africa. how to handle living in south africa how to handle living in south africa
TRANSCRIPT
Keeping our kids safe.
Presented by Sheryl Cohen
Africa
Keeping our kids safe
•How to handle living in South Africa
Anxiety and fear
•Normal anxiety•Fear vs. Fantasy•Behaviors
Response to anxiety
•Fight or flight•Physical symptoms•Denial•Anger•Freeze•Sadness•irritability
Response to fear
•Cognitive errors•Rituals (helpful and unhelpful)
•Talk about them•Future V Present•What if thinking
Safety
•@ home•@ play•On the way …
A constructive approach
Knowledge is empowering Reassurance doesn’t reassure Responsible exposure Helpful behavioral habits Creative containment
@ home
Help your children to know!
› Have the chat!› Stranger danger› Flight, Fright, Freeze
@ home
Once the news is out … show them what to do!
› Prepare› Practice› Role play› Remind› Empower
@ home
Develop ‘’WE BELIEVE’’ family statements
We believe that we are safe unless otherwise indicated
We believe that nothing bad happened to us yesterday so the chances are nothing bad will happen today
We believe in our inner voice to tell us if we feel safe or if we don’t
@ home
Creative containment of difficult feelings
› Worry wart› Dream catcher› Sharing worries› Drawing worries/badies and burning them› Normalize worries › Share your own childhood experiences
@ play
Know: where, when, who, how, what …
Create ‘’what if discussions? And responsible solutions’’
Let go …
On the way …
Helpful behavioral habits
› moving in and out the car quickly› listen to mommy or daddy› Window positions› Seat strapping› Scheduled vigilance (e.g.: when driving into
home)› Bag under seat › Greeting strangers› Sweets; stuff (distractions)› Balls in road (distractions)
When it happens?
DAMAGE CONTROL
What to do:
Listen carefully
Acknowledge feelings
Look out for fears and fantasies
Go for mastery
Call a trauma debriefer
Common symptoms of traumatic stress
Recurrent and intrusive recollections of the event Recurrent and distressing dreams of the event (or any
nightmares in children) Intense distress when exposed to cues from the trauma Efforts to avoid thoughts and feelings or conversations
associated with the trauma Efforts to avoid activities, places or people associated with
the trauma Inability to recall important aspects of the trauma Diminished interest in significant activities Feelings of estrangement or detachment Restricted range of affect Sense of foreshortened future Difficulty with sleeping; concentration difficulties Hyper vigilance; exaggerated startled response; anger
When to call for help?
When these symptoms get worse rather than better
When these symptoms persist for more than 1 month
When these symptoms impair normal social and work/school functioning
TROUBLE SHOOTING
•How Much is too much ?
TROUBLE SHOOTING
•When is anxiety normal and when is it not ?
Common myths:
It can’t happen on holiday It can’t happen to me Everyone has the same standards of
safety as I do Asking for help is a sign of weakness. I
can manage it on my own Its all fate and there is no way to avoid
what happens to me