adapted from communication style inventory: a communication preference self-assessment tool, by...

Adapted from Communication Style Inventory: A Communication Preference Self-Assessment Tool, by Kenneth R. Phillips, Phillips Associates, 2003. Arrangement and modifications copyright by Gay Wakefield, 1997-2004.

Communication StyleCommunication StyleCommunication StyleCommunication Style


– Effective Communication enhances interpersonal relationships, builds trust and teamwork, prevents costly mistakes, motivates and gets things done.

– Understanding how you communicate in a situation is the 1st step in improving your communication effectiveness.

– In every interpersonal interaction situation, Communication behavior in is a function of two variables:

• Concern for self • Concern for others

Communication Situations


Definition:

• Willingness to assert your own wants, desires, thoughts, feelings, opinions, or ideas in an interaction,

• Extent to which you attempt to get them met or accepted

• Another way to describe this variable is “courage to speak up for yourself”.

Concern for Self


Definition:

• Willingness to listen to the wants, desires, thoughts, feelings, opinions, or ideas of others involved in the interaction

• Extent to which you attempt to meet or satisfy others’ concerns

• Another way of describing this variable is “consideration for others”.

Concern for Others


Concern for Others

Con

cern

for

Sel

f

LowHigh

High • One quadrant represents low concern for self and low concern for others.

Communication Styles Matrix

Low/Low


Concern for Others

Con

cern

for

Sel

f

LowHigh

High • Another quadrant represents low concern for self and high concern for others.

Low/Low Low/High



Concern for Others

Con

cern

for

Sel

f

LowHigh

High • The next quadrant represents high concern for self and low concern for others.

High/Low

Low/Low Low/High



Concern for Others

Con

cern

for

Sel

f

LowHigh

High • The remaining quadrant represents high concern for self and high concern for others.

High/Low High/High

Low/Low Low/High




Concern for Others

Con

cern

for

Sel

f

LowHigh

High

AGGRESSIVE

• Each quadrant represents one of four styles.

High/Low High/High

COLLABORATIVE

AVOIDING

Low/Low Low/High

ACCOMMODATING


Concern for Others

Con

cern

for

Sel

f

LowHigh

High

AGGRESSIVE

• Each style’s approach sets up a situation leading to differing results …

• and some results are more productive than others.

I win/You loseHigh/Low

I win/You win High/High

COLLABORATIVE

AVOIDING

I lose/You loseLow/Low

I lose/You winLow/High

ACCOMMODATING



The Avoiding Style

– May be described as … • Unwilling to confront unpleasant issues, • Wanting to keep the peace, • Uncomfortable sharing desires and needs with

others, • Passive/aggressive.

– Characteristics may include … • Agreeing to requests, but not following through, • Withholding important information, • Withdrawing from a difficult situation, • Speaking softly.


The Avoiding Style– Results may include …

• Not getting own needs met, • Having to explain failure to follow through,• Feeling a lack of control

– Others may respond with … • Lack of trust • Frustration

– Try these tactics to deal with avoiders: • Reward them for initiating difficult discussions • Set specific due dates • Bring up potential issues before they “fester”


The Accommodating Style– May be described as …

• Sacrificing or overdoing for others, • Letting others have their way without expressing

disagreement, • Sidestepping issues, • Unwilling to advocate own desires.

– Characteristics may include … • Yielding to another’s point of view when you

believe otherwise, • Allowing others to make decisions for them, • Speaking tentatively, • Avoiding discussions about the “real” issue.


The Accommodating Style

– Feeling angry or frustrated for not stating opinions or feelings,

• Failing to achieve own goals, • Experiencing resentment, • Giving more than they receive

– Others may respond with … • Manipulation, Contempt, Anger, Guilt.

– Try these tactics with accommodators: • Clarify that disagreement can help relationships• Encourage assertive behavior from them


The Aggressive Style– May be described as …

• Commanding, • Critical, • Controlling,

• Uninterested in others’ perspectives. – Characteristics may include …

• Attempting to defeat the other person,• Blaming, • Interrupting others, • Using judgmental statements, • Speaking loudly• Talking past the “real” issue.


The Aggressive Style

– Results may include … • Getting what they want at others’ expense • Jeopardizing relationships

– Others may respond with … • Humiliation, • Defensiveness, • Vengefulness, • Avoidance of the aggressor

– Try these tactics with aggressors: • Use strong assertiveness skills• Plan and practice what to say in advance.


The Collaborative Style– May be described as …

• Focusing equally on what they and others want, • Smoothing rough situations, • Seeking common ground, • Generating creative results, • Easy to work for and with.

– Characteristics may include … • Conversational tone and volume, • Focus on the “real” issues, • Concern for feelings and opinions, • Spontaneous responses,• Exploring misunderstanding to find basis for

mutual understanding


The Collaborative Style– Results may include …

• Positive feelings about individuals and interactions, • Greater self-confidence and self-control, • Synergy and competitive advantage.

– Others may respond with … • Trust and freedom to express opinions and desires, • Feelings of affirmation, positivity about the results

– Try these tactics with collaborators: • Assume mutual regard and a positive outcome • Treat them the way they treat you in discussion: • Don’t interrupt, respectfully share feelings and opinions


Communication Styles

• Most people have dominant and supportive communication styles. – If your dominant style is not working, you will likely

switch to your supportive style(s) in an attempt to accomplish your objective.

– Your current dominant and supportive styles are comfortable because you learned them during childhood.

• But your dominant and supportive communication styles may or may not be the best in business settings


The Collaborative Style

• Strong business communicators use a collaborative style. WHY?

• Business results are produced with and through others, requiring a Win/Win approach. Therefore …– If your dominant style is not collaborative, you

need to adapt interaction strategies to achieve more success with others.


Build Your Collaborative Style

– How can you be more collaborative? • Use respectful vocal tones and phrasing. • Identify areas of confusion, then clarify meaning

– Listen Attentively • Do not interrupt others; hear them out. • Listen for meaning and emotion. • Rephrase what you think you’ve heard. • Ask nonthreatening, clarifying questions.



– Communicate nonverbally • Welcoming gestures • Leaning forward • Direct eye contact • Conversational tone • Relaxed posture • Friendly smiles

– Remember: How it’s said communicates more than what is said



– Interact openly • Focus on the meaning behind the words. • Be polite. • Keep an open mind. • Tactfully share your perspectives with others.

– Visualize being collaborative • Picture collaborative behaviors. • Imagine how it feels to collaborate. • Envision positive results to collaboration.



– Ask for feedback to check progress of collaboration

– Set communication development goals • Take assertiveness and listening skills training. • Learn to deal with other cultures. • Continuously work on improvement.


Keep Your Eye on the Goal

Concern for Others

Con

cern

for

Sel

f

LowHigh

High

AGGRESSIVE

I win/You loseHigh/Low

I win/You win High/High

COLLABORATIVE

AVOIDING

I lose/You loseLow/Low

I lose/You winLow/High

ACCOMMODATING

adapted from communication style inventory: a communication preference self-assessment tool, by...

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