Bill Cameron, President, Drug Free Scotland Haider Ali, President , Drug Free Nation, Pakistan Safia Umer, Program Manager, Drug Free Nation, Pakistan

Preface Every parent dreams of educating and preparing their

children to become good citizens, able to meet the

challenges of our competitive society in the good health

necessary to achieve this.

To be healthy means to be free from all drugs and

preventing drug misuse ought to be an integral part of

effective parenting. Parents are largely untrained to provide

the complete and appropriate supervision in such traumatic

circumstances at home.

Most of the advice given here is written to support you in

the situation you find at home with teenagers. Still, it will

be useful awareness for all parents whose children must

grow up in a society where drug abuse thrives.

This booklet suggests seven strategies to enable parents to

cope with their own family’s drug abuse problems at home.

Riffat Sadiq

1

1 Find out as much as you can about

drug addiction, current illegal drugs

and the problems they cause

2

1 Find out as much as you can about

drug addiction, current illegal drugs

and the problems they cause.

Parents are not only here to provide food and

protection but are also responsible to ensure

they are adequately prepared for situations

they may face in life, such as drug abuse.

In order to achieve this, parents must be well

informed themselves and consistently aware of

the dangers faced in our society on a day to

day basis in their own locality and nationally.

Parents must know, also, where their children

are at any given time of the day and what

company they keep at school and at play.

3

Today our society is aware of the rapid increase of

drug abuse problems and we must realize that

parents can play a huge part in coping with drug

addiction; therefore, knowledge of illegal drugs and

their effects is paramount.

4

HOW TO GET INFORMATION

Search any newspapers, magazines and books

that deal with drug addiction.

Search the website for any information.

If you are not connected to the internet

then you can talk to people over this issue.

Speak to parents who are currently affected

by this social scourge – ask them how they

are coping?

It is likely that your local school has

information and possibly a group for you to

attend.

5

You can talk to doctors working in your

residential area and local drug treatment and

rehabilitation services may be able to advise

you as a parent.

You must consistently observe any of the

following signs of drug misuse in your home.

.

6

KEEP WATCH FOR THE FOLLOWING!

Change in daily routine

Change in eating habits

Change or lack of sleeping habits

Trembling of body parts/hands

Nausea/vomiting

Watery or red eyes

Sudden change in behaviors

Mood changes

Impulsive or lethargic behavior.

Failing grades in school.

.

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Irritation, unusual anger, sadness

Poor concentration

Disobedience at school and home

Isolation or change of friends

Lack of interest in family or school

Truancy from school

.

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If any of these signs persist for a week or

more or have done for longer, consult mental

health professionals as soon as

possible, since many of these symptoms may

suggest a deeper problem and further mental

status.

If you suspect your child taking drugs, then

handle him/her patiently.

Avoid criticizing and threatening him/her.

Talk to the professional and deal your child

according to his/her instructions.

Do not be harsh with your child.

Discuss dire consequences of drug abuse for

his/her health.

Try to keep yourself aware of your situation

so that you may guide your children

appropriately and with truth.

(ALWAYS BE TRUTHFUL)

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2. A Trusting

Relationship Is Required

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A Trusting

Relationship Is Required

A trusting relationship between parent and

child may be difficult in this situation due

possibly to the child’s guilt and lies that he/she

may have engineered to protect him/her or a

member of his peer group. Parent-child

relations do facilitate the emotional growth of

child and further develops a sense of trust

between child and parent.

This relationship will reduce the “gap” between

parent and child, possibly to the extent that

the child may share much more concerning

his/her own relationships with friends and

generally what is going on in his/her life that

you may not be aware of. It will also help

him/her to handle peer pressure.

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HELPING TO BUILD TRUST Gratify all basic needs of your child including

need for love and affection on an

unconditional basis.

Listen to him/her what he/she wants to say

Sit with him/her, hug and love him/her.

Ask him/her about activities going on in

school, his/her likes/dislikes, etc.

Let him/her share feelings and thoughts

Give him/her space if he/she makes a

mistake.

This advice, depending on the age of your

child, must be tempered with your own

insistence that drugs are not acceptable in

any way in your home.

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3 Provide Quality Time

To Your Family

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Provide Quality Time

To Your Family

Quality of time often resolves conflict within the

environment of the family. A positive family

environment is essential to prevent drug abuse

amongst siblings.

Quality of time demands appropriate supply of

attention to child’s needs. Appropriate supervision

for one hour is better than inappropriate handling

for 4 hours.

Quality of time given to child also makes him/her

understand that parents are keeping their eye on

his activities. Parents will ask him/her if he or she

gets involved in anything wrong.

Quality of time is often ineffective if the child is

using drugs and not willing to share his/her

feelings. It may simple be time to listen or time to

let him/her know your feelings.

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How To Provide

Quality Of Time To Child?

Talk to your child in friendly way

Discuss something informative to him such as

media, career choice and introduce the

subject of drugs to let him/her know you are

aware that such things exist in your area.

Take tea/juice, or eat something sitting with

child so that you are both at ease and use

sense of humor, jokes to make your time

together interesting.

Let him/her share his future plans but take

care that this session does not turn into an

interrogation.

If he/she is using drugs, he/she will know

precisely what answers you require and also

that this quality time is an excuse to talk

about his/her drug misuse.

There are thousands of parents in the same

situation all over the world. Take heart.

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4. Aim To Maintain

Family Equality

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Aim To Maintain Family Equality

Inequality, injustice or inappropriate

criticism make child feel rejected and ignored.

Such thoughts may lead them to a seek release

through taking drugs or continuing to use.

Especially adolescents are very sensitive to minor

irritation. When you hug one of your children,

another may feel rejected so share your affection

and attention wisely despite the fact that you

may know that your current “problem” maybe

benefit more at this time.

It may be necessary to explain to other siblings

why you are taking so much time with another

brother or sister, so it may be beneficial to include

them all in your feelings and advise them how to

cope with your family problem.

Is it feasible to suggest that younger brothers and

sisters of a teenager at home who uses drugs might

well be aware of his/her addiction? They will need

advice and support to cope too.

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5. Maintain

Religious & Social Values

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5. Maintain

Religious & Social Values Values are essential to shape civilized behavior.

Present your religious and social values to children

in appropriate way. Make your values easy to be

followed.

First you will have to follow your values in order to

teach your children. Appropriate social and

religious values develop the sense of right and

wrong.

If your child learns from beginning that his/her

religion and society strictly prohibit alcohol and

other drugs, then he/she will be less likely to use

them in later life, even living in a society where

drugs are openly used.

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Religious/Moral Values

Taught By Example

Children of different ages must be taught

religious and social values with no

discrimination and according to their ability

to appreciate these values.

Use positive and negative reinforcement

while teaching values. For instance, a small

gift as a token of positive and the removal of

a facility (television) as a negative token.

Do not punish your child harshly because it

may make him/her aggressive and sabotage

your plan to enforce further values.

You, too, will have to follow the values which

you are going to teach your child.

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6. Be A Role Model

For Your Children

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Be A Role Model For

Your Children Try to present a positive role model for your

children. You will not achieve success, if for

example, you attempt to guide your child away from

drugs with a cigarette in your own mouth or by

sending him/her to the store for alcohol.

You are effectively displaying to the child that it

is okay for you but not for him/her. Your own

actions, words and life style teach.

Children also learn via observation so if you are

using, even privately, any of these substances –

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STOP NOW

YOUR CHILD WILL KNOW!

You have used any drugs as a teenager; alcohol,

cigarettes, marijuana etc, never boast about it to

your child unless you are prepared to justify that

these substances are not harmful.

AND THAT IS NOT THE CASE—EVER!

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7. Be An Honest Bread Earner

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Be An Honest

Bread Earner

Support your family honestly and fairly. Your

honesty and sincerity to your job also portray your

positive image to your children. It is a fact that

tomorrow you will reap whatever you sow today but

there is always time to change – the time is always

now.

Your source of earning teaches numerous lessons

to your children such as; differentiating between

right and wrong, gratification of needs in legal and

moral way, developing sense of self-

made/hardworking and so forth.

Your moral and religious values are important and

your local religious leader will be able to explain the

connection. Seek him/her for support.

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How To Be An Honest Bread Earner?

Try to find work somewhere that does

not oblige you to break your moral or

religious codes through employment, for

example, in a factory making cigarettes or

alcohol.

If you are a shopkeeper, would you be

able to sell betel nut, tobacco, paan, gutka

or tobacco – even to meet household

expenses? Think on that.

Avoid even minor contact with anything

that you are convinced is immoral or

dangerous.

Make a point, as far as drugs go, to be as

well informed as possible for your society,

your local town, your family and yourself.

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