1st grade writing samples and annotations
DESCRIPTION
1st Grade Writing Samples and AnnotationsTRANSCRIPT
1st Grade Writing
Samples
1st Grade Writing SamplesAurora Public Schools
w r i t i n g
Evidence and ElementsPersonal Narrative1st Grade
a n n o t a t i o n s
Personal Narrative
First Grade
Scaring Sister
Elements Evidence Focuses on one important moment of the
author’s life
The small moment is about a time that
the author was scared by her brother.
Central character is the author The piece is written in first person.
Plot is developed by taking a focused
moment and stretching it out to
describe important events
The writer includes some events to
stretch out the moment.
For example:
The brother plotted to scare the sister.
The brother dressed like a ghost.
The mother told him to stop.
Plot usually involves a problem that is
solved, a tension that is resolved, or
something big that changes
The tension is resolved when the
brother wants to scare his sister and
then he scares her.
Structured with a beginning, middle, and
end
B – Brother thought about how he could
scare his sister
M- Brother scared his sister
E- Sister told on her brother
Chronologically sequenced The events happened in order.
Includes a setting (time and place) The setting is “one perfect night”.
Next Step: Include more information
about the place that it happened.
Uses details to describe events and
people
Next Step: Include more details
Includes reactions, thoughts,
observations, and feelings of characters
Includes the reaction “I was scared”.
Contains closure or reflective
statements
The closure is: “I told my mom, “Mom
Jorge scared me.” “Stop,” said my mom.
May contain dialogue Contains some dialogue
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Evidence and ElementsHow To1st Grade
a n n o t a t i o n s
How To
First Grade
How To Make an Ice Cream Sundae
Elements Evidence Gives instructions or directions on how
to do something
This piece explains how to make an ice
cream sundae.
Title introduces topic
Title – “How To Make A Ice Crame
Sunde” describes the genre and topic.
Contains a list of what will be needed List contains – “Sprinkels, syrup, bowl,
banana, chery, and ice crame.”
Sketches and words provide a series of
general steps or actions for carrying out
a procedure or activity
Sketches include detailed pictures and
numbered steps.
Steps and actions are organized in order
by time
Steps are organized by numbers.
Numbers or transition words are used to
indicate sequence of steps or actions
Numbers are included, and there are two
transition words.
Details help the reader to understand
the instructions
There are some details like “a little bet
of carmel syrop”.
Next step: The author could include
more details like “put a lot of cream on
top of everything”.
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Evidence and ElementsAll About1st Grade
a n n o t a t i o n s
All- About
First Grade
All About Cats
Elements Evidence Contains facts and information focused
on one subject
This All-About has facts and
information about cats.*
Title announces topic of text The title of “All About Cats” describes
both the genre and the topic.
Main topic is divided into subtopics
which become separate chapters or
sections
Main topic is divided into subtopics
which become separate chapters. “What
is a Cat? Different Kinds of Cats, What
Do Cats Eat?, Fun Facts, How To Care
for a Cat, and Cat Diagram.”
Organized by table of contents Contains a table of contents.
Contains features of nonfiction texts
that relate to topic such as: labeled
diagrams, headings, captions, and
pictures
Contains headings, subheadings, pictures
that illustrate the information, and a
labeled diagram.
Contains pages with unique purposes
(e.g.: how-to page, parts-of page, fun
facts page, and different-kinds-of-
something page)
There is a Fun Facts section on page six,
a How-To on page seven, and a Parts-of
Page on page eight.
May include a simple concluding sentence The How-To section includes a simple
concluding sentence.
Contains names and vocabulary related
to topic
Includes the vocabulary and names
related to the topic, “mammal, coat,
kittens and the names of different kinds
of cats.”*
*It’s important to note that the child chose this topic. She used the pictures from
a nonfiction book about cats to describe different kinds of cats. The majority of
the facts were from her background knowledge.
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tront ents
Whot is o Cat?
Diffe rent kinds of Cots 2-4
Whot"do Cots eat?
Fun Focts
How to care f or o Cat
Cat Diogrorn
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A cot is not o f ish. A cqt is o rnornrnol.5o me cots ljve in hornes. so me cots arewild. Some cafs sre srnoll ond some conbe big.
What is a Cat?;1',1.,.o.n* |"i:ij
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Diff erent kinds of Csts
Colifornio Spongled CotThe Calif ornio Spon gled cat hos strips.They look like smoll cheetohs.
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Bomboy CatThe Bornboy cot is o shiny cot. They hove
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Burmese CotThe Burm ese cot hos o brown coot.
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cots con eat d.y or wet cot food. so rnecots eat tuno.
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Chm ter 4Fun Facts
All kittens hove blue eyes to begin withond then they cono?Qnge.
turn green, yellow or
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First , give the cot plenty of f ood. Next,give the cat plently of weter. Th ?fr, keepthe cot's bed in o [ruorrn ptoce. Lost , givethe cot plenty of {ove. Thot's how tocare for o cot. \,T
How to Care f or o Cat
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w r i t i n g
Evidence and ElementsAuthors As Mentors1st Grade
a n n o t a t i o n s
Authors As Mentors
First Grade
Swinging Chair
Elements Evidence Adding ellipses in their drafts
Yes, effectively uses ellipse. “Then I went too
fast and…fell off the swinging chair.”
Repeating key phrases (comeback lines)
Next step: She could have taken “swinging chair”
and made it into a comeback line.
Orienting the reader by starting with time (e.g.:
It is early in the morning)
Yes, she says, “One afternoon…”
Using precise details gathered from researching
or visualizing This cannot be determined by looking at a writing
sample. The teacher would need to observe this
behavior.
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w r i t i n g
Evidence and ElementsPoetry1st Grade
a n n o t a t i o n s
Poetry
First Grade
Brain
Element Evidence Describes ordinary things in fresh
new ways
Describes the brain as a “think box”.
Chooses topics that elicit strong feelings Next step: Select topics for poems that would
elicit strong feelings.
Chooses a small object, moment, or detail that
represents the big feeling
Author choose a small object – the brain, but
didn’t represent a big feeling.
Have their own special music
The repetition of the word “brain” gives the poem
it’s own music.
Contain topics that matter to the poet
The topic of a brain is important and relevant to a
first grader.
Have language, rhythm, form, line breaks, music,
and meaning
Author uses unique language to describe the brain
as a “think box” that “holds” things.
Next step: Use line breaks in a way that adds to
the music of the poem.
Convey feelings by “showing, not telling” The author attempts to “show, not tell” by using
the simile, “A brain is like a think box”.
Next step: Use more descriptive words.
Writes in different poetic voices:
o Speaks to the subject/object of
the poem (speaking to the
object)
o Tells a story with breathless
urgency (storytelling voice)
o Speaks to the reader and says
something that is the deepest,
truest sound of the poet’s heart
(lyrical voice)
o Uses dialogue (conversational voice)
In this poem, the lyrical voice is used to describe
the brain.
Uses patterns that support the meaning of the
poem
The word “brain” is used in a pattern to support
the meaning of the poem.
Rereads poems aloud over and over and decides
how the poem should be read
This cannot be determined by looking at writing
sample. The teacher would need to observe this
behavior.
Changes words so poems sound like music
Next step
Rereads poems for honesty and revises words
until they are precisely right
Next step
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Science is Elementary
Elementary ScienceAurora Public Schools