1 arc discovery projects: 100 word summaries and keywords professor bill griffin faculty of science...
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ARC DISCOVERY PROJECTS:
100 WORD SUMMARIES AND KEYWORDS
Professor Bill GriffinFaculty of Science
And
Professor Stephen CrainFaculty of Human Sciences
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Cross Faculty Seminar for DP13 applicants (100 word summary
and key words) How to get assessor’s attention in
the first 5 minutesProfessor Bill Griffin
Faculty of [email protected]
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Example 1:
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Example 1:
Comments:
[1] The whole thing is so vague that it is not clear what will be studied, or HOW – not at all clear what actually will be done with the $$$$
[2] Why do we care? Why is this a “major challenge”?
[3] VERY FRUSTRATING
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Example 1: Suggestions for 100 word summary
100 word summary (750 characters)The males of most animal species try to mate with as many females as possible; the evolutionary advantages of spreading their genes as widely as possible are clear. However, there are many examples of monogyny, in which a male mates with only one female throughout their lifespan. What are the evolutionary advantages of such a strategy? Can we gain new insights into the processes of evolution by understanding male faithfulness? We will use (XXXX techniques) to compare the (XXXX characteristics) of XXX species of (insects and spiders) known to have different mating strategies, and analyse the relative effectiveness of these strategies by XXXX. Besides improving our understanding of basic evolutionary biology, the results will have broad implications for taxonomy (XXX because taxonomy is related to evolution through XXXX).
Possible improvement (from non-biologist) (701 characters)Original text:
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Example 1: Suggestions for media release
Media release 50 words (350 characters)Why do the males of some species remain faithful to one mate, while others mate with as many females as possible? The project will study the XXX of (insects and spiders) to understand the advantages and drawbacks of such different mating strategies. The results will provide new insights into the ways that evolution works in practice.
Original text:Possible improvement (from non-biologist) (336 characters)
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Example 1: Suggestions for keywords
Key words1. Monogyny;2. Evolutionary biology;3. Mating strategies;4. Insects and spiders (?)
Original: Possible improvement:
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Example 2:
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Example 2:Comments:
1. Title is far too complex and messy. Note title mentions “natural sources” but summary and media release are unclear on whether this addresses “natural” emissions (from what? Rocks?) or includes industrial pollution, and which is larger.
2. 100 word summary: second and third sentences mixed up – puts solution before problem. Logic of last sentence is lost because it just repeats previous sentences in vaguer form. Not clear what actually will be done (measured) or how.
3. “Air-surface” etc appear in title, and key-words, but not in 100-word summary or media release; Media release not bad, but jumbled
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Example 2: Suggestions for 100 word summary
100 word summary (750 characters)
Mercury is a global pollutant; it is ubiquitous in the environment and is a threat to the health of humans and the global ecosystem in which we live. There are essentially no Australian data on our emissions of mercury, nor on its biological and chemical cycling between land, water and atmosphere. This lack of data seriously hampers scientific and policy debates surrounding mercury’s role in Australian and global environments. We will use XXXX technology to measure mercury emissions from XXXX, and levels of mercury in air, soil, plants and water in different ecological systems, to quantify the emission and deposition of atmospheric mercury. The results will provide a better basis for informed policy-making.
Original text:Possible improvement (from non-expert) (716 characters)
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Example 3: Suggestions for media release
Media release 50 words (350 characters)Mercury is a critical hazard to human and environmental health, but there are few data on levels of Hg in the Australian environment. We will measure the levels of mercury in key environments, and the chemical and biological mechanisms that recycle Hg, to provide a better basis for informed policy-making.
Original text:Possible improvement (from non-expert) (257 characters)
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Example 2: Suggestions for title
Project Name
Atmospheric mercury in the Australian environment: roles of chemical and biological cycling
Original text: Possible improvement:
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Example 3:
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Example 3:
Comments:
1. Overall, not bad at all – these are not the reasons the proposal failed. But can be improved, mainly by making some sentences more direct
2. Title could be inverted?
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Example 3: Suggestions for 100 word summary
100 word summary (750 characters)
A lack of suitable lasers that operate in the mid-infrared spectrum is constraining progress in many fields of science and technology, including several areas of high national priority. Silicon and germanium are highly promising mid-infrared laser materials due to a host of outstanding optical, thermal and manufacturing-cost advantages, but suffer large intrinsic nonlinear losses. In this project the primary loss process, called two photon absorption, will be mitigated by using novel and highly efficient non-collinear pumping approaches. We will create practical mid-infrared laser devices that have the properties demanded by important applications such as the stand-off detection of chemical hazards for security and defence.
Possible improvement (from non-expert) (742 characters)Original text:
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Example 3: Suggestions for title
Project Name
Overcoming parasitic loss in silicon and germanium Raman lasers to drive mid-infrared applications
Project NameSilicon and Germanium Raman lasers for mid-infrared applications: Beating the parasitic two-phonon absorption problem
Original text: Possible improvement:
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Example 4:
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Example 4:
Title: Note catchy start, then more details – says exactly what the aim is
Project Name
What lies beneath: Unveiling the fine-scale 3D compositional and thermal structure of the subcontinental lithosphere and upper mantle
Comments:
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Example 4:
Sentence #1: What is the aim and why is it important?Sentence #2: Why do we need to do more research?Sentences #3-4: What we will do and how we will do it – note indication of novel approachesSentence #5: Expected outcome and why it is a Good Thing
100 word summary (750 characters)
Characterising the compositional and thermal structure of the lithosphere and upper mantle is one of the most important goals of Geoscience. Yet, a method capable of providing robust estimates of these two fields in 3D has still not been achieved. This limitation is the focus of this project, which will develop the first full 3D method that integrates multiple geophysical and petrological datasets. We will apply our methodology to image the fine-scale thermochemical structure of the lithosphere beneath Australia, South Africa, and western USA. This project will not only help us understand the evolution of continental lithosphere but its outcomes will be translatable into predictive exploration methods for Australia's Deep Earth Resources.
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Example 4:
Media Release: What we will do, and how it will benefit society
Media release 50 words (350 characters)We will produce the first high-resolution images of the thermal and mineralogical structure of the Earth's mantle beneath Australia, western USA, and South Africa. This information represents the key to our understanding of society-relevant activities such as ore and energy exploration and natural hazard
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Example 4: Keywords
Key Words: mostly repeated in the title and/or summary
Key words1 Lithosphere architecture2 Mantle composition3 Geophysical methods4. Lithospheric modelling
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Lessons - 1Lessons – 100-word summary (and media release) – see Proposal #4 1. First lines – What is the problem and why is it important?
2. Next – What will you do to solve it? Approach, methods. Must be simple but direct. If possible, stress novelty or innovation aspects of your approach.
3. Finally – What will the results be, and how will they benefit science and/or society (or some other grouping)
4. Don’t leave the referee with questions like the ones I have highlighted in yellow.
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Lessons - 2
Thoughts on Titles: 1. Try to convey the problem, and some excitement, already in the title
2. Keep it short and direct
3. See Proposal #4: something “catchy”, then real info
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Lessons - 3Other advice:
Avoid jargon (i.e. words a non-expert will not know) (or explain it)
Use straightforward declarative sentences, with no unnecessary adjectives or hype
Avoid using nouns (especially strings of them) as adjectives/adverbs (e.g. “gaseous mercury air-surface exchange” air-surface exchange of gaseous Hg)
Check for consistency between title, summary and keywords. Don’t have a new idea suddenly appearing in the media release or keywords……
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And now, over to Stephen…
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Some general points:
Make reviewers feel smart Make what you write accessible to someone who is
smart and open-minded, but not an expert in your field.
Hemingway, not Proust Sentences should be short, simple, and succinct.
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Avoid vague expressions: ‘in terms of’, ‘involved’, ‘in relation to’
Presupposition versus assertion: include all the logical steps Avoid presuppositions that reviewers might not make
Reviewers should read, not think
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Don’t start a sentence with a citation
Avoid rhetoric and jargon Rhetoric and/or jargon can be useful in early drafts.
Delete this in later drafts.
There is no perfect sentence.
Introduce spontaneity in the 14th draft
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Example 1:Original
Title: Identity checks in four dimensions: Improving the process of identity verification using stereoscopic and moving images
Many security situations and financial transactions rely on the verification of identity from photographs (e.g. passport checking, surveillance, credit card/driver’s licence verification, etc.). This involves the comparison of an unfamiliar, corporeal face to a flat, motionless photograph. Although humans are expert at processing familiar faces, our ability to accurately match unfamiliar faces in such situations is extremely poor. This project aims to improve identity-checking performance using motion and depth information, and to advise improvements to ID verification systems for situations such as border security, surveillance and financial transactions, saving lives and millions of dollars in Australia and abroad.
Revised
Title: Verifying the Identity of unfamiliar faces: Are four dimensions better than two?
Security transactions typically rely on the ability to verify the identity of an unfamiliar person using a flat, motionless photograph (e.g. a passport, credit card, or driver’s license). Whereas humans are expert at processing familiar faces, we are poor at matching unfamiliar faces to ordinary photographs. This project asks if our capacities to process unfamiliar faces improves when we are presented with photographs that contain information about motion and depth. The outcomes could lead to improved ID verification systems for border security and for surveillance of financial transactions, thereby saving lives and reducing security costs in Australia and abroad.
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Example 2:Original
Title: Thought set to music: Effects of background music on cognition
We frequently listen to music while doing something else, yet there is little understand of how background music affects our ability to think. The aim of this research is to examine how music listening interacts with ongoing cognition, including benefits that arise when music stimulates physiological arousal, and costs that occur when music is distracting. One block of experiments will examine how background music influences the time it takes to perform simple or routine tasks, focusing on the association between musical tempo and mental speed. Another block of experiments will focus on interactions between background music and language processing. The findings will have relevance for public policies involving education, health, and safety.
Revised
Title: Setting our thoughts to music
Little is known about how background music affects our thinking. This project investigates how background music influences ongoing cognition. The potential outcomes include both potential benefits such as stimulating physiological arousal, and potential costs such as distracting us from our tasks. One series of experiments investigates the associations between musical tempo and the speed of mental calculations, examining how background music influences the time it takes to perform simple, routine tasks. Another series of experiments investigates the influence of background music on language processing. The empirical findings promise to lead to evidence-based improvements in public policy, in education, health and safety.
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Example 3:Original
Title: When and how does remembering with others help memory, especially as we age?
We remember our past in the company of others almost as often as we remember alone. This project aims to investigate if remembering with a long-term partner can minimize memory loss, especially as we age. This project is significant because it: (1) tests a theory that predicts the positive and negative consequences of remembering with others, (2) extends a major cognitive memory paradigm to measure these consequences, and (3) applies this theory and paradigm to healthy younger and older adults, both couples and strangers, including older adults who complain of or show memory decline. The outcomes of this project will be new theory and data on when and how remembering with a partner can promote and protect "healthy memory".
Revised
Title: Is it better to remember with others, or to remember alone?
We remember past events in the company of others almost as often as we remember them when we are alone. This project investigates the extent to which remembering with a long-term partner minimizes memory loss, especially as we age. The project extends a major memory paradigm to evaluate the positive and negative consequences of remembering with others. The experimental populations include both couples and strangers, as well as older adults who are experiencing memory decline. The outcomes of the project will enhance our understanding of how remembering with a partner promotes "healthy” memory, potentially leading to important social benefits for an aging population.
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Example 4:Original
Title: A cross-sectional study of the proximal and distal influences on young children’s activity levels
The widely held assumption that children naturally engage in high levels of physical activity is now known to be false. Improvement in measurement of physical activity has led to consistent findings of low levels of moderate-vigorous activity, even in contexts designated for play. This raises serious concerns for children’s short and longterm health and development. Educators, health professionals and the wider community, including governments, are motivated to act. Unfortunately, efforts have been in the absence of a clear understanding of the main contributors to children’s physical activity and potentially different influences for boys and girls, age and socioeconomic status. Findings will inform future interventions for children.
Revised
Title: A cross-sectional study of factors that influence children’s physical activity Research has disproved the widely held view that children naturally engage in high levels of physical activity. Improved measurement techniques reveal lower than expected levels of physical activity in the moderate-to-vigorous range, even during periods of play. The findings raise concerns for our children’s short-term and long-term health. The present study is designed to identify the factors that stimulate children’s physical activity, including factors that differentially influence boys versus girls, and factors that are beneficial to children at different ages and from different socioeconomic backgrounds. In the absence of a clear understanding of the causal factors that promote increased physical activity, educators, health professionals and government officials will not be sufficiently motivated to implement interventions. The outcomes of the present studies will inform evidence-based interventions and social policies.
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So long, and thanks for all the fish