YOUR ATTITUDE IN

MARRIAGE MATTERSWhat are you looking for in your marriage?

How do you want to see your marriage

improve? You must hence change your

attitude.

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A good attitude will help your

marriage succeed.

Many times marriages fail, not

because of a lack of love, but

because spouses do not have a

good attitude.

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Your attitude has a huge impact

on your marriage. Unsuccessful

couples seem to find something

wrong, even in good times,

while successful couples strive

for an attitude of gratitude, even

in bad times.

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Marriage is supposed to grow. When people join in marriage, they are both amateurs. The attitude that they will possess can make the marriage grow or die. The big question is: WHAT ATTITUDE DO YOU HAVE IN YOUR MARRIAGE?

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Your outlook in marriage begins

with your thinking on what you

allow your mind to dwell on—it

shows up in your attitude.

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Philippians 4:8

‘Finally, brothers, whatever is

true, whatever is noble, whatever

is right, whatever is pure,

whatever is lovely, whatever is

admirable--if anything is

excellent or praiseworthy--think

about such things’. (NIV)

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I would agree with the Apostle

Paul fully. This is fully a positive

attitude. Most people don’t

enter into marriage with a

positive attitude. They come

doubting whether it will work or

not.

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1 Corinthians 13:4-7

‘Love is patient, love is kind. It does not

envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is

not easily angered, it keeps no record

of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil

but rejoices with the truth. It always

protects, always trusts, always hopes,

always perseveres’. (NIV)

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This is really positive attitude. If you love your spouse, you will always go an extra mile to ensure he/she is comfortable. This is the most important person in life. Enjoy times pamoja. (Pamoja is a Kiswahili word meaning together)

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If you come into the marriage

with negative thoughts, I can

assuredly advise you not to try.

It will not work out well. You will

either cause pain or you will

experience pain in that

marriage.

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One reason attitudes are so important is that they affect your actions–that is your behavior and words.

The reality is that you may not be able to control your environment but you are responsible for what you do within your environment. Your attitude will greatly influence your behavior.

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If you want to know your

attitude, look at your words and

behavior. If your words are

critical and negative, then you

have a negative attitude.

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If your behavior is designed to hurt or get back at your spouse, then you have a negative attitude. Guarding the attitude is the most powerful thing you can to affect your behavior. And, your behavior greatly influences your spouse.

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Maintaining a positive attitude

in a troubled marriage may

seem impossible, but the

Christian couple can seek the

Lord’s intervention. Asking the

Lord to help you in your

marriage will see your marriage

succeed.

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The way you view your spouse

and the thoughts that you have

towards your spouse are very

important aspects in improving

your attitude in marriage.

A positive attitude can save a

difficult situation.

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YOUR ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING IN

YOUR MARRIAGE.

If you are expecting and anticipating that your spouse is going to be complaining, that is what you are going to hear more of. Since you are expecting it, it will be what stands out most when your husband or wife speaks to you.

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If you expect your spouse to be

dissatisfied with you then you

are going to prepare an

appropriate response in

advance, even when that might

not have been your intention.

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Your Attitude Determines Your

Feelings and Actions

How you think about your

spouse, and what you think

about your spouse, will

determine your feelings and

actions.

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Attitude is what you get after you

develop a style of thinking

(positive or negative) and then

practice it so well that it seems

like you don't even have to think

it out before you respond.

Having an attitude is like pre-

thinking your next response.

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Negative attitude is what is

killing the marriages and it

brings lots of frustrations in

life. The children, unfortunately

will also be affected by the

negative attitude in the family.

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POSITIVE ATTITUDES IN MARRIAGE

A. Watch out for your own negative attitudes where you predict negative responses from your spouse.

When your spouse has a repetitive negative response to your behavior, think about the criticism and what you can do to make life better for the most important person in your world.

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B. Change your thinking and

your emotions will follow. Erase

your negative expectations and,

as much as possible, meet each

other with a clean attitude.

Expect to enjoy each other and

you're more likely to.

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If you are newly dating you

should try to change your

attitude, adjust your behavior,

and spend more time together,

no matter how busy you are.

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If you are serious about

improving your marriage you

have to examine your own

attitudes and be prepared to

make changes.

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If a negative attitude is wearing

your marriage out, make the

intentional decision to change

it. Identify what causes

negativity in your marriage. The

next time it occurs, try

something different.

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Always seek people that have

great attitudes. Learn from

them. Ask how they keep a

good attitude in difficult

situations.

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The cost of having a bad

attitude is high. Your attitude

affects everything in your life.

It’s the lens through which you

see the world.

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Taking charge of your

relationship in a positive way,

and with a positive attitude, can

lead you to a marriage that is

better than ever.

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Change your attitude, change

your marriage.

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