yo mama jokes encyclopedia.....the worlds funniest yo momma jokes!
TRANSCRIPT
Table of Contents
1. Yo Momma’s so Ugly2. Yo Momma’s so Fat3. Yo Momma’s so
Skinny4. Yo Momma’s so Dirty5. Yo Momma’s Breath
Smells so Bad6. Yo Momma’s so
Stupid7. Yo Momma’s so Old
8. Yo Momma’s so Short9. Yo Momma’s so
Cheap
1. Yo Momma’s so UglyYo momma’s so ugly her ownshadow’s ashamed to be seen with herin public.Yo momma's so ugly, when she lookedin the mirror her reflection screamed inhorror.Yo momma's so ugly her birthcertificate was a restraining order.Yo momma's so ugly, when we went toa haunted house, she came out with apaycheck.Yo momma's so ugly, when she wasdoing door-to-door sales, someonetold her it wasn't Halloween yet.Yo momma’s so ugly, when she andyour daddy go for walks they tell yourdaddy to put a leash on his dog.
Yo momma's so ugly, when we went tothe zoo, a little boy pointed to her andsaid, “Daddy, can I feed that monkey abanana?”Yo momma’s so ugly, when she wasborn the doctor apologized formalpractice and gave her momma arefund.Yo momma's so ugly people give herdog treats at the pet store.Yo momma’s so ugly the last time Isaw something that looked like her, Ipinned a tail on it.
2. Yo Momma’s so FatYo momma's so fat she hopped in anelevator to go up and it went down.
Yo momma's so fat she makes amonster truck a low rider.Yo momma's so fat she goes to arestaurant, looks at the menu, and says,"Okay!"Yo momma's so fat she sank theTitanic.Yo momma's so fat I had to take a trainand two buses just to get on her goodside.Yo momma's so fat she has to iron herpants on the driveway.Yo momma's so fat, when we went to akid's birthday party, everyone thoughtshe was the bounce house.Yo momma's so fat, she went to RedLobster for endless shrimp last monthand she's still there.
Yo momma’s so fat, when she walksdown the street, they have to redirecttraffic.Yo momma’s so fat her belly button hasan echo.Yo momma’s so fat she dislocated hershoulder trying to scratch her back.Yo momma’s so fat your daddy gaveher a spare tire as an engagement ring.
3. Yo Momma’s so SkinnyYo momma's so skinny, when I lockedmyself out of my apartment, sheslipped under the door and let me in.Yo momma's so skinny a thong bikinilooks baggy on her.
Yo momma’s so skinny she turnedsideways and disappeared.Yo momma's so skinny, if she haddreads I'd grab her by the ankles anduse her to mop the floor.Yo momma's so skinny she usesChapstick for deodorant.Yo momma's so skinny people inEthiopia are collecting donations forher.Yo momma's so skinny I can blindfoldher with dental floss.Yo momma's so skinny she can hulahoop in a Fruit Loop.Yo momma's so skinny when she worea yellow dress she looked like a No. 2pencil.
Yo momma's so skinny she was theunderstudy for the tree in MerryChristmas, Charlie Brown.Yo momma's so skinny everyonethought she was the coat rack at yourbirthday party.Yo momma's so skinny she fell throughthe cracks on the sidewalk.Yo momma's so skinny your daddy usesher as a toothpick.
4. Yo Momma’s so DirtyYo momma's so dirty homeless peoplethrow change at her when she sits on apark bench.Yo momma’s so dirty, when she toldyour daddy to take out the trash, he put
her out on the curb.Yo momma’s so dirty, when I calledher on the phone I got an ear infection.Yo momma’s so dirty when she shookher hair out, your little sister yelled,“Oh look, it’s snowing!”Yo momma’s so dirty, when hermomma threw her out on the street shegot a fine for littering.Yo momma’s so dirty she turned SnowWhite black.Yo momma's so dirty her elbows leaveskid marks on the dinner table.Yo momma's so dirty she stains yourdaddy's clothes when they hug eachother.Yo momma's so dirty she leaves a ring
around the public swimming pool.Yo momma's so dirty she went to thecar wash and still couldn't get clean.Yo momma's so dirty she swam in thelake and all of the fish died. 5. Yo Momma’s Breath Smells so BadYo momma's breath smells so bad,when she starts talking, the sewer ratsask each other what's that nasty smell.Yo momma's breath smells so bad thatskunks hold their nose when shebreathes out.Yo momma's breath smells so bad herteeth didn't fall out, they ran away.Yo momma's breath smells so bad herdentist has to wear a gasmask.
Yo momma's breath smells so bad Idon't know if I should give her a TicTac or a piece of toilet paper.Yo momma’s breath smells so bad shemakes onions cry.Yo momma’s breath smells so bad thedog won’t even lick her face.Yo momma’s breath smells so bad,when she exhales her eyes tear up.Yo momma's breath smells so bad,when she stuck her tongue out it was ona stretcher.Yo momma's breath smells so bad, it'sconsidered a weapon of massdestruction.
6. Yo Momma’s so Stupid
Yo momma's so stupid, when I wasdrowning and yelled for a life savershe asked, "Cherry or grape?"Yo momma's so stupid she thoughtmenopause was a button on the VCR.Yo momma's so stupid she put apeephole in a glass door.Yo momma's so stupid she asked mewhat kind of jeans I had on. I said,"Guess," so she said, "Levi's."Yo momma’s so stupid, when I told herto butt out, she dropped her pants. Yo momma's so stupid, when she sawthe Exit sign above the door, sheimmediately left the building.Yo momma's so stupid, when I askedher if she was good at spelling, shetold me she didn't know magic.
Yo momma's so stupid, when I told herI had chicken pox, she asked me if theywere grilled or crispy.Yo mama is so stupid that when shetook you to the airport and a sign said"Airport Left," she turned around andwent home.Yo momma’s so stupid she put aquarter in a parking meter and waitedfor a gumball to come out.Yo momma's so stupid she went out tothe garden with a measuring spoonwhen the recipe called for two cups offlour.
Yo mama is so stupid that when shewent to take the 44 bus, she took the 22twice instead.
Yo momma's so stupid, when they told
her she had to repeat eighth grade, shesaid, "Eighth grade."
7. Yo Momma’s so OldYo momma’s so old, after I boughtcandles for her birthday, the storedidn’t have anymore in stock, so I hadto go to another store to get some more,and then another one after that, and Istill don’t have enough for her damncake!Yo momma's so old she knew Mr.Clean when he had dreadlocks.Yo momma's so old, when God said,"Let there be light," she flipped theswitch.Yo momma's so old, when she was in
school there was no history class.Yo momma's so old she used to play inthe sandbox with George Washington.Yo momma's so old she remembersAbraham Lincoln as a baby.Yo momma's so old the fire departmentcame when we lit the candles on herbirthday cake.Yo momma's so old the date on herbirth certificate says B.C.Yo momma's so old she used to hitch aride to work with Fred Flintstone.Yo momma's so old she named theNina, the Pinta, and the Santa Maria.Yo mommas so old her first babypicture is carved in a cave somewhere.
8. Yo Momma’s so ShortYo momma's so short she has to use aladder to get up on the curb.Yo momma’s so short she has to standon her tippy toes to drink out of astraw.Yo momma's so short, when I dissedher, she tried to jump kick me in theankle.Yo momma's so short she broke her legtrying to get off the toilet.Yo momma's so short she goesmountain climbing on ant hills.Yo momma's so short she tripped overa thimble.Yo momma’s so short, when she toldyour daddy she wanted to live in a
bigger place, he moved her intoBarbie’s Dream House.Yo momma’s so short her aboveground pool is a cereal bowl.Yo momma’s so short she uses awashcloth as a beach blanket.Yo momma's so short she has to get arunning start to jump in bed.Yo momma’s so short she has to drivea matchbox car.Yo momma’s so short she goes figureskating on an ice cube.
9. Yo Momma’s so CheapYo momma’s so cheap, when you spit,she yells at you for wasting water.Yo momma’s so cheap she only
showers when it’s raining.Yo momma’s so cheap, for your firstbirthday, she put a bunch of stuffedanimals in the backyard and said youwere at the zoo.Yo momma’s so cheap she demanded arefund at the dollar store.Yo momma’s so cheap, for Halloweenshe threw a pillowcase over your headand called it a costume.Yo momma’s so cheap she let her hairfall out to save on haircuts.Yo momma’s so cheap she tried to usecoupons at a yard sale.Yo momma’s so cheap she refuses topay attention.Yo momma’s so cheap she goes to the
mall food court and hides free samplesin her cheeks. Then she spits them outon a plate and says, “There’s yourdinner.”Yo momma’s so cheap she collectscereal box prizes and gives them toyou on Christmas.Yo momma’s so cheap she uses plasticbags as luggage.
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