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September issue of WNC Parent

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  • 2 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 3

  • 4 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 5

    Are you amember?Join the conversation,

    post photos and connectwith other parents atWNCParent.com.

    Look for WNC Parent onFacebook and Twitter.

    .com

    c o n t e n t sThis months features

    In every issue On the cover

    As I write this note for the baby issue, Ivejust sent my babies off to school, my babieswho are now 10 and 13 years old. Its true,what they say about time flying.

    My son is in his last year of elementaryschool. As we waited together for him toboard the bus on the first day, we reminiscedabout how, when he was about 3, he insisted oncoming out every morning, sometimes inpajamas, to wait for the bus with his oldersister. I can hardly believe that was so longago. And now he is just as content waitingoutside by himself, with a reassuring, Imfine, Mom.

    When you have a baby (or two), it is hard to imagine your kidsas old enough to see themselves off to school. Instead, youreworried about diapers and baby food. To ease those concerns,weve got a story on each this month. Learn about how to go greenand go local with your diapers in our story on Page 14. And getsome ideas on how to make your own baby food on Page 9.

    Another worry: to work or stay home? Some Asheville momsdecided they didnt want to choose, so they turned their ideas intoa home business. Meet them in our story on Page 6.

    For parents of older children, one debate is whether to usemoney as an incentive for grades, sports or chores. We talked toarea families to find out how they handle this. Get their takes onPage 16.

    Lastly, its fall (almost), which means festivals and football.Find a roundup of area family-friendly autumn events on Page 36.And meet a fewWNC families with a great enthusiasm for collegefootball on Page 19.

    Heres to a great fall!

    The baby years

    Kids Voices .....................35

    Growing Together............39

    Dads View ......................42

    Librarians Picks ...............45

    Story Times .....................45

    Divorced Families ............46

    Nature Center Notes ........46

    Artists Muse ...................48

    FEAST .............................49

    Kids Page ........................66

    Calendar .........................71

    Working at homeWNCmoms buildbusinesses and raise kids.

    Make your ownBaby food doesnt need tocome from a jar.

    Night schoolA few evening classes areavailable for parents whowork.

    Green diaperingLocal companies make andsell cloth diapers and more.

    Money asincentiveDo you pay your kids forgood grades or athleticperformance?

    Football funThe whole family gets intothe festivities for collegefootball.

    Milk sharingMoms who cant nurseturn to others for milk.

    Diner fareMake the burgers, friesand milkshakes at home.

    Scary moviesParaNorman kicks off astring of scarier moviesfor kids.

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    By Kaelee Denise Photography,www.kaeleedenise.com.

    WNC PARENT EDITORKatie Wadington [email protected]

    FEATURES EDITORBruce Steele

    [email protected]

    P.O. Box 2090, Asheville, NC 28802828-232-5845 | www.wncparent.com

    PRESIDENT AND PUBLISHERRandy Hammer

    ADVERTISING/CIRCULATIONBrittany Martin 232-5898, [email protected]

    CALENDAR CONTENTDue by Sept. 10. E-mail [email protected]

    ADVERTISING DEADLINEAdvertising deadline for the October issue is Sept. 1

  • For parents who want to stay at home with their little ones,earning an income at the same time can be challenging. But,as many moms (and dads) have found, with hard work andperseverance, it can be done.

    Nearly two years ago, Asheville momsMarsha Almodovar andSandra Brown met at a Mommy andMe yoga class and instantlybonded. Now, they own a business together, Lango Asheville, animmersion-based language program with classes in Spanish,French andMandarin for children ages 18 months to 11 years.

    One of the main reasons we started Lango Asheville was so wecould spent as much time possible at home with our babies, saysAlmodovar, who like Brown, has a background in education. An-other reason was our amazement at the ability of our own kids to

    TRANSFORMINGANIDEAINTOINCOME

    By Pam J. HechtWNC Parent contributor

    Marsha Almodovar, left, with her son, Wyatt, and Sandra Brown with her daughter, Lilianna Sofia, started LangoAsheville so they could work and remain at home with their children. JOHN FLETCHER/[email protected]

    Savvy momsstart home-based

    businesses

    6 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 7

    learn several languages this young.Almodovars son, Wyatt, is 2, and

    Browns daughter, Lilianna Sofia, is 20months old.

    Before her son turned 1, Almodovar, astay-at-home mom, became a single par-ent. She wanted to continue being at homewith her son but needed to find a careershe was passionate about that could sup-port herself and her son, she says. Brownalso wanted a job that was home-based sothat she could spend more time with herdaughter. Knowing the benefits of learninga foreign language at an early age, theysaw the need in Asheville for a foreignlanguage program.

    The challenges have been juggling itall, says Almadovar. The most importantthing is time management and keeping to aschedule.

    Both teach classes but do most of thework from both of their homes. Sandrasmother helps take care of Sophia; Mar-shas live-in, 21-year-old niece helps withWyatt; and at times, Brown and Almodovartake turns watching the kids.

    For Brown, not overworking herself isthe biggest challenge, she says.

    Sometimes I find myself working waytoo many hours during the night when mydaughter is sleeping, Brown says. I ne-glect my own sleep so I can get thingsdone and be able to enjoy with my daugh-ter fully during the day.

    Having a home business has allowedme to create my own work schedule whichis always attuned to my daughters ownschedule, Brown adds. Being your ownboss and having plenty of schedule flex-ibility is definitely one of the biggestperks.

    TV producer changes the channelStephanie Carroll Carson, of West Ashe-

    ville, never intended to have her own busi-ness. But with the birth of her first child,working as an Emmy-award winning net-work producer for CBS did not allow herthe flexibility she had always wanted as aparent.

    After relocating to Asheville from Phil-adelphia before her second daughter wasborn, she turned the freelance work shewas doing on the side into a home busi-ness, working part-time and later, a flex-ible, nearly full-time schedule once heryoungest started preschool. Now, shesable to have more quality time with herdaughters, Elise, 4 and Aubrie, 2, whilestaying in the field she loves.

    Its different than the freelance work Iwas doing before theres not as much of

    a commercial market in Asheville, shesays. So I had to reinvent myself.

    Carsons company, Out of the Box Pro-ductions, produces video content for com-mercial and corporate clients, events, anddocumentaries, as well as wedding video.It also provides media relations consult-ing. As a freelance journalist, Carson alsoruns the North Carolina and Florida bu-reaus of the Public News Service, an on-line news content provider.

    I wouldnt have it any other way, saysCarson, who appreciates her ability tothrow in a load of laundry while workingdown the hall in her home office.

    Being able to set her own schedule alsoallows her to be more available to herdaughters, who attend a preschool acrossthe street from home.

    But like Brown, setting boundaries and

    deciding when to shift gears and stopworking can be challenging, she says.

    I always want to check off everythingon my to-do list and make clients happyits a never-ending process, Carson ex-plains.

    Crafter marketshandmade accessories

    When Amanthus Lunns son, Orlen, 2,was born, she was intent on keeping herfocus on him. But with the familys needfor some extra income, she began thinkingabout how to translate another passion crafting into a side income, while stillremaining at home to maintain the house-hold and care for her son.

    Lunn decided to market her handcraft-

    Stephanie Caroll Carson, owner of Out of the Box Productions, in her home office with herchildren Elsie 4, and Aubrie, 2. JOHN COUTLAKIS/[email protected]

    Continues on Page 8

  • 8 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    ed dog apparel and accessories for chil-dren and adults made of sustainable fab-rics such as up-cycled clothing or materi-als made of organic, bamboo or recycledplastic bottles.

    Working from home made sense toLunn, who needed the flexibility to bal-ance family life, she says.

    Having my own business is somethingI can do creatively that goes beyond beinga mom and partner, says Lunn, of WestAsheville. I love being at home with myson, but at times I need something formyself and any money that I can contrib-ute financially is helpful.

    After selling by word of mouth, Lunn isexpanding her business, Miss Ladyfingers,and her products will soon be available atlocal stores as well as online, she says.

    For Lunn, the challenge is finding ded-icated time for her business without get-ting distracted.

    Her fiance helps take care of Orlenand a baby sitter comes twice a week forseveral hours.

    I also try to utilize naptime and eve-nings, says Lunn, who is setting up ahome studio with space for Orlen to playalongside her.

    Tips for home business successLunn, Carson, Almodovar and Brown

    each turned to Mountain BizWorks, forhelp getting their businesses off theground. The Asheville-based nonprofitprovides loans, consulting and training to

    emerging and established small busi-nesses.

    A variety of additional resources arealso available in the area, and many offerservices that are low cost or free. Find outwhat each has to offer to find the best fitfor your needs, says Jill Sparks, executive

    director of Asheville-Buncombe TechnicalCommunity Colleges Small Business Cen-ter in Candler.

    Start with A-B Techs SBC or elswhere,Sparks adds, for free classes on a varietyof business topics, confidential counseling,and referrals to other resources.

    Go through the process of creating abusiness plan, including financial and timeimplications, and define your product andmarket, says Annie Price, small businessdeveloper at Mountain BizWorks. Withoutenough planning and systems put intoplace, the business can run you creatingemergencies and fears instead of viceversa.

    Be realistic about what will work, cre-ate a doable timeline and start with some-thing youre passionate about, says Sparks.

    Price suggests networking, gettingprofessional support and finding otherswho have home businesses to help buildyour business and so that you dont feelisolated.

    If carving out time to work in the begin-ning is a challenge, take baby steps ithelps to use a timer and to start out work-ing in 15-minute, laser-focused incre-ments, Sparks says.

    And create a dedicated work space anda time that the family respects, Price says.

    Remain authentic, but professional, sheadds.

    You dont have to hide the fact that youwork from home, Price says. But nobodyneeds to know that you havent showeredor you have spit up on your shoulder.

    Pam J. Hecht is a freelance writer, editor and tutorbased in Asheville, North Carolina. E-mail her [email protected] com.

    Amanthus Lunns son, Orlen, models a bibmade by his mom. Lunn is working to turnher passion for crafting into a side income.SPECIAL TOWNC PARENT

    IDEAS TO INCOMEContinued from Page 7

  • Making baby food at home is notnearly as challenging as youwould think. In fact, for ripe ba-nanas and avocados, the process only hastwo steps: peel and mash.With many parents trying to avoid certain

    additives and preservatives, preparing baby foodfrom scratch is becoming more common.We have a whole-foods philosophy in our home, said Megan Schneider, Brevard mom of Noah, 4,

    and Maggie, 2. We try to do as much garden-to-table meals as we can. Were a very food-centeredfamily and aim to make most of our meals from scratch.Jennifer Henry, North Asheville mom to Vivian, 16 months, prepares baby food from her own kitch-

    en to keep a better eye on what her daughter eats.

    MADE BY

    By Susanna Barbee, WNC Parent contributor

    W N C P A R E N T . C O M 9

    taking care of baby

    With a little effort, gardencarrots become pureedcubes of baby food.

    Continues on Page 10

    MOM

  • 10 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    I started making baby food because Iwanted to know that what was going intoher body was fresh and organic, that therewere no added sugars or preservatives,she said.

    According to Karin Knight and TinaRuggiero, authors of The Best Home-made Baby Food on the Planet, the ingre-dients used to make store-bought babyfoods are heated to very high temper-atures to sterilize them and increase their

    shelf life. In the process, the foods loseflavor and some key nutrients.

    Benefits of making your babys foodinclude improving freshness, limitingpreservatives, enabling parents to providea wider variety of textures and foods, andlower costs, said Dr. Colby Grant, a pedia-trician at Asheville Childrens MedicalCenter.

    Not only can homemade baby food bemore nutritious and flavorful, but thereare many more options as to the types offruits and vegetables parents can offertheir babies. While many stores carry thetypical apples, bananas, pears, peas, sweetpotatoes, carrots, and squash, its rare that

    foods such as avocado, mango, apricots,blueberries, collards, and spinach evermake it to the baby food aisle. When mak-ing baby food at home, the options arelimitless.

    Make and freezeThe how-to process may vary by par-

    ent, but basically, all you needs to getstarted is a way to cook the fruit or vegeta-ble and an appliance to puree it. There aremany baby food makers on the market butfor most, a commercial maker it not neces-sary.

    Most things I steam first to maintainas many of the vitamins and nutrients as

    Jennifer Henry, of North Asheville, prepares food for her daughter, Vivian, to make sure she isnt getting additives in her food. SUSANNABARBEE/SPECIAL TOWNC PARENT

    MADE BY MOMContinued from Page 9

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 11

    possible, said Henry. I then use a handmixer or food processor to mash to thedesired consistency, adding a little wateralong the way. Breast milk or formula canbe used in place of water.

    To store homemade baby food, youllneed BPA-free ice cube trays with lids(find these at stores like Bed, Bath andBeyond), freezer zip-top bags and a per-manent marker. Keep fresh no more than aa two-day supply. The rest of the batch canbe frozen and used within four weeks.

    Once food is ready, I put it in ice cubetrays, freeze them, then pop them out andput in freezer bags. Each cube is approxi-mately 1 ounce, so if your baby is eating 2ounces, use two cubes, Henry said. Labeleach bag with type of food and date pre-pared.

    To thaw, either place freezer bags in thefridge overnight or transfer cubes to aglass bowl and heat in the microwave,stirring every five seconds. Only thawwhat you will use within one to three days,and do not refreeze any leftovers.

    Beyond fruitsWhen thinking of homemade baby food,

    many parents consider only fruits andvegetables, but baby cereals can also bemade from scratch.

    I got a lot of diversity from grains bymaking them at home, Schneider said. Iused quinoa, millet and brown rice. Then Iwould put flax seed in for omega-3s.

    As with fruits and vegetables, grocerystore offerings of cereals can be limited,typically only rice, oats and barley. Somestores, like Earth Fare and Greenlife,carry many grains in bulk. Parents canpurchase a variety of grains, grind them topowder in a coffee grinder, store in airtight containers and then measure out tocook.

    However, Grant issued a caution aboutmaking your own cereal.

    In contrast to homemade baby cereals,commercially made cereals are fortifiedwith iron, the pediatrician said. Breast-fed infants may not get enough iron frombreast milk alone once they are 6 monthsof age.

    For parents who make baby cereals,Grant recommended giving babies a vita-min with iron or offering other foods highin iron such as beans and meats, oncetheyre 6 months old. Further, the iron willbe better absorbed if paired with foodshigh in vitamin C, such as apples and avo-cados.

    DownsidesWhile there are a number of benefits to

    making homemade baby food, there aresome disadvantages. Store-bought varie-ties are more convenient. Its much easierto throw a jar of baby food in the diaperbag than to take the homemade version.

    It does take a little more time to planoutings, Henry said. When going out,you have to put the homemade baby foodin with an ice pack.

    There are also some safety and healthconcerns when it comes to homemadebaby food.

    Some drawbacks of making your

    babys food are the risk of choking if thefood is not strained or well pured or pos-sible bacterial contamination, Grant said.In order to reduce the risk of contamina-tion, it is important to clean the materialsused to prepare the food thoroughly, fullycook meats, avoid contact with surfacesused to prepare rawmeat or eggs, andwash hands well.

    Honey and home canned foods shouldnot be used in baby food due to a risk ofbotulism, he added. Homemade spinach,green beans, carrots and squash shouldnot be given to babies under 6 months ofage because they are high in nitrates.

    Many moms and dads just dont havethe time to make baby food; its quicker topurchase food from the store and have itreadily available. If you are a workingparent and would like to make some or allof your babys food, many baby food reci-pe books suggest spending one Sunday amonth in the kitchen preparing batches tofreeze for the next four weeks.

    Ultimately, it comes down to personalpreference and parents opinions regard-ing whether or not the benefits outweighthe drawbacks.

    For me, making baby food at home wasa given. Its the best possible food for theleast amount of money, Schneider said.

    Jennifer Henry prepares carrots to make baby food for her daughter. SUSANNABARBEE/SPECIAL TOWNC PARENT

    LEARNMOREThere are numerous resources available

    to help parents make their own babyfood. Jennifer Henry learned how to makebaby food from other moms; she nowblogs about it on the DIY page of herblog, www.redheelsandbananapeels.com. Megan Schneider used the bookSuper Baby Food by Ruth Yaron forinspiration.Many recipes can be found online using asimple Google search.

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    Youre a working parent who doesnt leave the office until 5 p.m. too late to attend many classes thatparents can take with their young children.

    Unlike you, stay-at-home parents and those who work later in the day have lots of dayside events andclasses they can take with their toddlers and older children, frommusic lessons to foreign language classes.But thats not true for moms and dads who get off work about the same time that many child-oriented busi-nesses and institutions are closing for the day.

    There are lots of parents that work9-to-5, and they want to do things withtheir little ones, said Kari Richmond,director of (and a teacher at) AshevilleArea Music Together. So many parentsasked her if she offered classes in theevening that she created some two inAsheville and one in Marshall.

    Asheville Area Music Together offers6 p.m. classes on Thursdays, startingSept. 6, and 10 a.m. classes on Saturdays,

    starting Sept. 8, both at the Reuter Fam-ily YMCA in South Asheville. Theresalso a parent-child music class at TheTree House, a caf on Merrimon Avenuein North Asheville, at 5 p.m. Tuesdaysbeginning Sept. 4. As of press time, Mu-sic Together hadnt worked out the timeand day for its new class in Marshall, butRichmond said it would be after-hours aswell.

    Music Together classes are a mix of

    music and large and small movements,depending on a childs development andinclination. Through singing, dancing,finger play and overall play, children andparents incorporate music into everydayactivities such as brushing teeth andgetting ready for bed. The idea, Rich-mond said, is to integrate music intochildrens lives through the examples oftheir role models their parents.

    The more that parents make music

    Fitting in classes

    By Paul Clark, WNC Parent contributor

    Parents who work 9-to-5 have tough timefinding evening activities

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 13

    with them, the more the children will do itin their own lives, Richmond said. For alisting of dates and fees, go to www.ashe-villeareamt.com.

    The Little Gym of Asheville (www.the-littlegym.com) has classes on Wednesdaynights. The class at 5:40 p.m. is for chil-dren 19-30 months, and the class at 6:30p.m. is for children 30 months to almost 3years. Both classes use songs and play toteach things like motor development. Thelatter class phases out parent participa-tion to get their children ready for pre-school, said Anna Bartlett, The LittleGyms program director. Free introduc-tory classes help parents determine if TheLittle Gym is right for them and theirchildren.

    Asheville Music School (www.ashe-villemusicschool.com) in downtown Ashe-ville has put together a new schedule ofpiano, voice, guitar and music explorationclasses that parents and children can taketogether. They can also take joint musiclessons on instruments as varied as didge-ridoo and classical bassoon (as well asnearly all conventional instruments).

    A students success depends on whatthey do between lessons, said Amy RaeStupka, Asheville Music School director.If you have parents and kids having funand learning together at their lesson inclasses, chances are they will have funand learn together between classes.

    Helping fill the after-hours void are afew institutions and businesses that offerparent-child classes on Saturdays. Hereare some of them:

    The Asheville YMCA(www.ymcawnc.org) in downtown Ashe-ville and the Reuter Family YMCA inSouth Asheville offer several swim class-es on Saturdays that parents can take withtheir children up to age 3.

    The Tree House has a one-hour artsclass on Saturdays that begins at 10 a.m.Children 12 to 48 months recently madepapier-mache bowls out of yarn (theyounger ones glued yarn to cardboard).Classes are different every week, thebusiness said.

    Parents also may want to check mar-tial arts studios in the area.

    Sun Soo Tae Kwon Do (www.martialar-tasheville.com) in West Asheville has anadult/family mixed-rank class from11:45a.m.-1:15 p.m. Saturdays.

    DojokuMartial Arts (www.dojo-ku.com) in South Asheville offers a 45-minutes family class at 6:15 p.m. Mondaythrough Thursday. Its one of our biggestclasses, owner Raymond Cagle said.

  • Wonderfully soft, the world of white cloth diapers isbenefiting from green technology in a way that allowsmothers to be as good to the environment as they are totheir babies.There are several green companies in the Ashe-

    ville area that offer services for babies and parents.They make organic material diapers, salves and balmsprimarily because they believe the products are betterfor babies and less harmful than chemical-filled dis-posable diapers and ointments that have been popularfor years. But they also make them in ways that are envi-ronmentally sound and less harmful to the Earth.

    White means greenBabee Greens, an Asheville seller of organic, fitted cloth diapers and other

    baby products, estimates disposable diapers cost a family $2,000-$3,000 in achilds first two or three years, compared with a few hundred dollars for clothdiapers. Disposable diapers use twice as much water, three times as much ener-gy and 20 times the rawmaterials as cotton ones to make, said Tia Gilbert, ownerof Babee Greens. They generate 60 times as much waste and are estimated to take250-500 years to decompose, she said.

    Ruth Gavin, an Asheville seamstress who sells cloth diapers through her company Roly

    By Paul Clark,WNC Parent contributor

    Asheville companies market clothdiapers and more to parents

    Baby products go

    GREEN

    Roly Poly diapers, from small to large, snap together at the hip and are sold atGreenlife Grocery, French Broad Food Co-op and elsewhere around Asheville.

    Online, theyre available at Ruth Gavins etsy website, www.rolypolycrafts.etsy.com

    14 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    taking care of baby

  • Poly, said you can keep a ton of waste outof landfills by diapering a baby for twoyears with cloth diapers. And studies in-dicate babies in cloth diapers potty trainfaster than those in disposable ones, BabeeGreens states on its website.

    Plus, cloth diapers end their lives as thesoftest imaginable rags coveted by peoplewho wash cars and polish furniture, saidErika Richie, owner of Smarty Pants Dia-per Service in Asheville.

    Babee Greens (www.babeegreens.com)sells certified organic diapers, covers,wipes and other products. Ten years old,owned and operated by mothers, BabeeGreens offers diapers (with snaps, notpins) and related products made in Ashe-ville frommaterials made in the UnitedStates. The products, free of chemicalfertilizers, pesticides and insecticides, aremade of organic cotton or cotton/hempblends and made with cotton thread andelastic and non PVC poly resin snaps.

    Gavin started making diapers years agoto save money and broaden her sewingskills. Now, her company Roly Poly(www.rolypolycrafts.com) sells reusablecloth pocket diapers, covers, wipes, diaperpail liners, snack bags, gowns, onesies,quilts, T-shirts and other products. Herpocket diapers have three layers abright, outer one made of waterproof fab-ric, a soft suedecloth or microfleece wick-ing inner one and an absorptive, anti-bac-terial middle one made of organic hempand cotton.

    Roly Poly diapers, from small to large,snap together at the hip and are sold atGreenlife Grocery, French Broad FoodCo-op and elsewhere around Asheville.Online, theyre available at Gavins etsywebsite, www.rolypolycrafts.etsy.com.

    They last through a zillion washes,Gavin said.

    Smarty Pants Diaper Service(www.ashevillediaperservice.com) offers aservice any parent would love and deliverswithin a 30-mile radius of downtown Ashe-ville. On a familys designated day of ser-vice, they leave the dirty diaper bag out.Smarty Pants picks it up and in its place, ina sparkling clean pail liner that it supplies,is an allotment of unbleached, fresh,downy diapers. Whats not to like?

    A few weeks before the baby is born,Smarty Pants owner Erika Richie meetswith parents to get them oriented and todeliver the first weeks allotment (shelleven show parents how to use a cloth dia-per). Smarty Pants recommends 80 dia-

    pers a week for newborns, 60 for infantsand 40 for toddlers. But it is happy toadjust, depending on a familys needs.

    Theres this perception out there thatcloth diapering is difficult, but its reallynot, Richie said. Im dealing with cus-tomers who have never seen a cloth dia-per before, and theyre so easy to put on.

    Cloth diapers dont have to use safetypins anymore. Richies use pinless closuresystems.

    Beyond diapersFounded 30 years ago, i play

    (www.iplaybabywear.com) is an Ashevillecompany that offers blankets and sheets,

    towels and washcloths, clothing, outwear,rainwear, swimwear and UV protectiveplaywear, as well as accessories for new-borns to toddlers. It also sells dishes,bottles, cups, bibs and other feeding itemsfor young children, as well as toys.

    All are made from eco-friendly petro-leum, PVC- and BPA-free materials. Itoffers biodegradable and compostableecoplastic products that are safe forbabies and good for the Earth, i playclaims. Feeding accessories are madefrom cornstarch and potato starch. i playdesigns its products in Asheville and man-ufacturers them in China, Thailand, Koreaand Taiwan, adhering to fair labor andenvironmentally responsible standards, itstates on its website.

    Theresa Victa, a licensed massage andbodywork therapist in Murphy, has anonline business Mountain Spirit Essen-tials (www.mountainspiritessentials.net) that offers the baby product CalendulaBaby for diaper rash. Its made from cal-endula flower extracts, olive oil, beeswax(and nothing else).

    Ginger Rose Herbal (www.artandherb-als.com), an Asheville company, makesseveral baby (and mother) herbal prod-ucts. Its Healing Bottom Butt Salve con-tains candellila wax and olive oil-infusedSt. Johns Wort, calendula and comfrey. ItsHealing Bottom Baby Powder is madefrom arrowroot powder, kaolin clay, slip-pery elm and comfrey root. Its SoothingBabyMassage Oil infuses chamomile androse petals in almond oil.

    A comebackCloth diapering has seen a resurgence

    locally at least since 2006, when Gavin hadher first baby, she said. She started mak-ing cloth diapers in part because shecouldnt find them.

    When you have your first baby, itskind of shocking to see howmany paperdiapers and wipes you begin to accumu-late, she said. Moms want to be greenerand to reduce waste. Cloth diapers aregetting bigger and bigger every year.

    Babee Greens, which buys the cash-mere and merino wool in its diaper coversfrom local Goodwill stores, estimates itsretail sales figures jumped more than 150percent from last year, Gilbert said.

    Its amazing how people are startingto pay attention to this, for the benefit oftheir babies and for the environment,Gilbert said. Its something to feel reallygood about.

    Ashevilles Babee Greens sells organic,fitted cloth diapers and other babyproducts. Disposable diapers use twiceas much water, three times as muchenergy and 20 times the raw materialsas cotton ones to make, said Tia Gilbert,owner of Babee Greens. SPECIAL TOWNCPARENT

    W N C P A R E N T . C O M 15

  • 16 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    The pre-game warm up is complete andthe pep talk in the dugout is well underway for Fairviews Pink Lightning, an 8Ugirls softball team coached byWendySayles.

    Dont forget, Sayles tells the girls,who are full of giggles in anticipation ofthe game, theres a dollar for every homerun and every pop fly caught.

    With a hearty cheer, the girls race totheir positions on the field. Sayles teamwas undefeated in the regular 2012 softballseason winning 20 games. She started

    using money as an incentive to moti-vate her players and as a reward forthose who performed well. The girlsget excited about that dollar, Sayles, ofFairview, says. It gets themmotivatedto play hard and do their best, and itgets them excited about the game.

    When it comes to her own kids, how-

    By Betty Lynne LearyWNC Parent contributor

    Brandon Crisp, 12, started his own small business during his summer vacation by mowing and weed eating for extended familymembers. SPECIAL TOWNC PARENT

    OPINIONS VARY ONWHETHER KIDS SHOULD RECEIVE MONEY FOREVERYTHING FROM CHORES TO GRADES TO ATHLETIC ACHIEVEMENTS

    TO PAY OR NOTTOPAY?TOPAY?

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 17

    ever, Sayles, the mother of Ethan, 13, andBraylin, 8, lets the grandparents dole outthe cash.

    Our parents pay both kids for homeruns and pop flies, she explains. And thegrandparents also pay for grades. Forexample, Ethan was rewarded by hisgrandmother for staying on the honor rollall year long. At home, Sayles and herhusband, Shane, do not financially rewardtheir kids for helping out around thehouse.

    They have to do chores, Sayles says.Thats a part of being in this family. Sheadds, however, that if Ethan goes aboveand beyond with outside chores on theirsizable family farm, his father or grandfa-ther will slide Ethan a few dollars for hisefforts.

    The Perkin family, of Swannanoa, usesmoney to a certain degree with their threeboys, ages 10, 13, and 14. Louisa Perkinbelieves in giving the boys an allowanceand says, We use it as a tool. There are norequirements to receive the allowance;however, it does come with responsibil-ities.

    The boys receive their allowance andare expected to calculate the 10 percentthat is to be tithed. From there, each boydetermines what goes into savings, anamount that, according to Perkin, fluctu-ates from week to week.

    Because they receive this allowance,they are expected to cover some of theirown expenses such as a movie when outwith a friend, Perkin says. When summerrolls around with all of its extra treats, theallowances stop as Perkin feels mom anddad should cover those expenses. Sheunderstands, however, her boys desire toearn money so they give the kids summerchallenges.

    Both Tim and John had a challengethis year which could earn them up to$80, she says. So there is serious moneyon the table. This summers challengewas to read The Story, an abridged,chronological version of the Bible thatreads like a story.

    This challenge was self-driven, and Ididnt harp on them to get it done, Perkinexplains. And the questions at the end ofeach chapter had to be completed to keepup their writing skills. She signed a con-tract with the boys to pay them $2 perchapter, and if they completed the lastchapter before school started, it was worth$20. Like the Sayles family, the Perkinsesdont pay for chores.

    We believe that families have to work

    Continues on Page 18

  • 18 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    together and do a wide variety of chores tobetter the family, she says. It is expectedand not rewarded with money.

    Paul Fugelsang, a licensed professionalcounselor who works with adults, kids, andfamilies in Asheville, agrees that usingmoney as an incentive for chores is a badidea.

    I dont recommend using money tomotivate kids, Fugelsang says. If a childis raised to believe that he will get a re-ward every time he does something hessupposed to do, then he will assume thathis value in the family is primarily con-nected to the pay he receives and not theeffort he puts forth.

    This method will backfire, according toFugelsang, when the child becomes anadult and those monetary rewards arentalways forthcoming.

    When she becomes an adult, your childwill be disappointed by the lack of mone-tary incentives in the real world, Fu-gelsang says. When she isnt paid extrafor getting to her job on time or doing her

    work, disillusionment and decreased ef-fort is likely to occur.

    Fugelsang encourages those in hispractice to give their kids a set, weeklyallowance that is unconnected to chores.This gives kids the opportunity to learn to

    handle money and learnabout fiscal responsibilityat an early age when, as henotes, the consequences ofspending poorly are muchless expensive.

    The Crisp family, ofFairview, includes Brianand Charon plus their threekids Brittainy, 14; Brandon,12; and Brooke, 10. All threeattend Asheville Christian

    Academy, which precludes the kids receiv-ing money for grades.

    We already sacrifice a lot to pay fortheir education, Charon Crisp explains,so we feel they should be giving theirbest efforts for themselves, not becausetheyre being paid. At home, when thekids were younger, Crisp would offer thema quarter or 50 cents to do some chores,but the money wasnt enough to inspireanyone.

    I was so cheap, no one was interested,

    Crisp says, laughing. Now they do every-thing anyway with no pay benefits.

    However, if the family is running late,she admits to offering Brooke a couple ofdollars to feed everyones animals nosmall chore with ducks, rabbits, dogs, cats,fish and chickens in two locations. Andthis summer, Brandon started earningmoney by mowing and weed eating formembers of his extended family.

    The kids also lend a hand, free ofcharge, with their grandparents cabbagepatch in Henderson County. The familyplants more than 35,000 cabbages eachyear, and the Crisp kids are right thereplanting, fertilizing, hoeing and harvest-ing.

    I feel you do some things, like workingthe cabbage field, just to help other peo-ple, Crisp says. Not everything in lifeshould be based on money.

    Even if she had more disposable in-come to share with her kids, Crisp says thekids should be willing to help their par-ents, not just see dollar signs in exchangefor their efforts.

    If I help my kids as they grow up,Crisp says, I hope they will be there tohelp us when we get older without expect-ing money for their love and support.

    TO PAY OR NOT?Continued from Page 17

    PaulFugelsang

  • As fall brings cooler weather, weekly festivals and chang-ing leaves, this cherished time of year also brings footballseason. And for many families, its the latter thats the most anticipated. Aftermonths of being outside at the beach or the pool, many folks are ready for Saturdaycollege football on TV and tasty snacks on the coffee table.

    FOOTBALL

    FUNBy Susanna Barbee,WNC Parent contributor

    College football drawsfamilies together

    Continues on Page 20

    W N C P A R E N T . C O M 19

  • 20 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    For three WNC families, football is anexciting part of their lives. Including theirchildren in the fun makes the tailgatingand spectating even more special.

    The Solomons,Tennessee

    Fletcher mom Raegan Solomon and herhusband, Hunter, are both graduates of theUniversity of Tennessee. To make it afamily affair, they include 3-year-old Ley-ton, 1-year-old Griffin and the dogs whencheering on their Volunteers.

    When we watch games at home, every-one gets their UT gear on. Even the boxershave UT shirts, Raegan Solomon said.We sing and dance to Rocky Top to getrevved up and ready. During the game, we

    cheer, clap, dance and give high-fives. Thekids love the excitement.

    Hunter Solomon grew up going to UTgames with his grandfather, and now bothparents look forward to taking their ownkids to Knoxville.

    We have not made the trip with thewhole family yet. Were hoping to get to agame this year though, Raegan Solomonsaid.

    In the Solomon family room, visitorswill find UT basketballs signed by coachesPat Summit and Bruce Pearl, along withvarious UT photographs hanging on thewalls. True fans, the Solomons even namedtheir two boxers Rocky Top and Peyton(after famed UT quarterback Peyton Man-ning). Daughter Leyton always makes sureto include the dogs in their Rocky Topdancing.

    With a couple of changes to the UTcoaching staff over the past several years,the Solomons are looking forward to asuccessful year of UT football.

    The kids love watching for the guys in

    orange and finding mascot Smokey duringthe game. We wear our UT colors proud-ly, Solomon said.

    TheWhitners,Appalachian State

    Lindsay Whitner and her husband,Zane, of Weaverville both attended Uni-versity of North Carolina at Wilmington, aschool with no football team. When Lind-says brother began attending AppalachianState University, the entire family, in-cluding 1-year-old Bryn, began pulling forthe Mountaineers.

    It has been fun keeping up with theteam through my brother, hearing of sto-ries and continuing to rib our Michiganfamily over the University of Michiganloss to App State, Whitner said. We madeit to a game last year with our newestaddition, Bryn, when she was about 6weeks old. A tradition we hope to continuewith her for many years to come.

    Lindsay and Zane Whitner, with daughter Bryn, cheer for Appalachian State. The couple attended UNCWilmington, which doesnt have afootball team, so they put their loyalties with Lindsays brothers alma mater. JOHN FLETCHER/[email protected]

    FOOTBALL FUNContinued from Page 19

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 21

    The entire Whitner crew travels toBoone in their App State colors to tailgatebefore games.

    Tailgating is such a blast, Whitnersaid. We pack a picnic of sandwiches andsnacks, fill up a cooler and just hang out.We buy face tattoos, wear gold and black,and even dress Brynie in her colors.

    When visiting Boone, Whitner and herfamily always visit the bookstore to look atand buy ASU T-shirts, hats and face stick-ers. Now that daughter Bryn is older, it willtruly be a family affair.

    We are hoping to pull Bryn in more thisyear; she was too little last year. She lovesto clap when other people are and her un-cle loves to spoil her, so I am sure it will bea good time! said Whitner.

    The Dunnings,Ole Miss

    Jody Dunning, of Swannanoa, attendedOle Miss as did both her parents. So whenfootball season rolls around, she and herkids Asher, 8, and Frederick, 6, look for-ward to cheering on the Rebels.

    We travel to at least one out of towngame a year and to Oxford every otheryear, Dunning said. When we watchgames from home, its very casual. Wehave the TV on all day on Saturday. Wehave two TVs and watch back and forth.The kids run in and out: playing footballoutside, eating snacks and watching thegames.

    The Dunnings love tailgating at TheGrove at Ole Miss. The Grove is one of themost famous tailgating stations in thecountry. With white linens on the tables andcandelabras hanging from the tents, TheGrove is the epitome of Southern charmand hospitality.

    Oxford is the best game because of TheGrove. Tailgating is a very formal affairthere, Dunning said. There is also a walkof champions where the marching bandand the entire football team goes through.My boys love that part.

    Although the adults in the Dunningfamily are faithful Ole Miss fans, Asherand Frederick lean a little toward UT. Withtheir aunt being a former Volunteer andthe school being closer in proximity, theboys have UT football uniforms and lovepulling for the guys in orange and white.

    With ties to UT, Ole Miss and Florida,the Dunnings see numerous touchdownseach fall and have a lot of fun from Augustto January.

    Our family definitely loves football,Dunning said.

  • 22 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    PREPARING FOR SCHOOL

    Holly Hageman loves watching her daughter, 3-year-oldBrooklynn, learn new concepts.

    Alphabet flashcards, books and shapes and numbers puz-zles are a just few of their favorite activities at home in Atco,N.J.

    She likes to learn, and I try to make it as fun as possiblefor her, says Hageman, a human relations specialist. Mak-ing learning fun keeps her attention longer.

    Many parents take on the role of being their childrenspreschool teacher and the responsibility of readying them for

    Help yourpreschoolerlove to learn

    By Candy Grande, Gannett

    Brooklynn Pigott shows her mom a flashcard. Holly Hageman makessure her home is stocked with educational games and puzzles for herdaughter to explore. GANNETT

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 23

    kindergarten.To achieve this goal, it is important for

    parents to introduce a variety of subjects ina positive and playful manner.

    Learning should not be forced, saysMarion Godwin, who has taught first gradein Moorestown, N.J., for more than 30 years.It should be taught according to what theyknow and do best and that is play. Whenteaching them, play games and have funwith the subject.

    Godwin says parents should try to createa nurturing learning environment in theirhomes by filling it with books, puzzles,blocks and other stimulating toys. And par-ents should always be looking for teachablemoments.

    You want a child to be a lifelong learner,so you want to show them learning is every-where, says Godwin. If parents take thetime to lay a strong educational foundation,their children will keep building on it.

    Introduce children to science with hands-on activities that interest them, such asgrowing plants from seeds, discussing ani-mals and how to care for pets, and observingthe chemical changes that occur duringcooking, says Godwin.

    Holly Hageman studies the alphabet with her daughter Brooklynn Pigott at their home inAtco, N.J. JOSE F. MORENO/GANNETTContinues on Page 24

  • 24 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    Sorting activities, simple patterns andcounting games are a great way to teachchildren the basics of math, and takingthem on field trips, singing songs andreciting rhymes also are ways to preparethem for the first day of school, she says.

    I think children are naturals when itcomes to computers, says Godwin. Letthem play educational games on the com-puter and teach them how to type theirfirst names using the keyboard. When theyare more familiar with using the comput-er, let them find pictures of animals andplaces on the Web.

    Beth Ann Garofola of Marlton, N.J., is amother of four children, Grace, 6; Ellie, 5;Katie, 2; and 1-year-old Luke. As a part-time independent contractor for the Chil-drens Literacy Initiative, she knows theimportance of reading to her children.

    If you read with your children for atleast 15 minutes every day it is going to bea huge help for them, says Garofola. Itwill make them become better readers.The kids and I dont just read the words in

    a book either. We discuss the title, authorand illustrator, where a sentence beginsand ends, and make inferences with thepictures while we read.

    Garofola says she tries to help herchildren understand that every lettermakes a sound with fun activities andphonics games.

    When we go to the grocery store everychild brings their own list, she says.Even Luke has a list with A, B and C on it.I help him find something that begins witheach letter and make the sound of theletters.

    As a former elementary school teacher,Garofola knows the importance of prepar-ing her children for school. And anotherimportant learning aspect to consider, shesays, is socialization.

    I think socialization is one of the most

    important parts of school, she says. Doactivities with your child like sitting downand reading, following instructions andother social cues a teacher may give.There also are a lot of free programs likestory times at libraries and book storesthat can introduce a child to socializingwith others.

    Hageman visits the park every week-end so her daughter, Brooklynn, can makefriends and play with other children.

    At first she didnt want to play withother kids, she says. But now she likesgoing to the park and interacting with herfriends. She also enjoys playing with myfamily and friends children.

    If you notice a particular subject achild is struggling with, it is important tostay positive, says Godwin.

    Dont criticize the child, she says.You cant force them to learn something.If they dont get something right, so what?Smile and be happy and make the experi-ence joyful.

    Parents need to understand that if achild gets something wrong, they maythink something is wrong with them. Keepworking with them and when they get theright answer make sure you tell them howhard they worked to get the correct an-swer.

    You want a child to be alifelong learner, so you want to

    show them learning iseverywhere.MARION GODWIN

    a first-grade teacher for more than 30 years

    Love to learnContinued from Page 23

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 25

    About 4 million Bumbo Baby Seatswere recalled Aug. 15 after at least 84incidents in which babies fell, includingmore than 20 skull-fracture reports.

    The recall comes five years after 1million seats were recalled to add awarning label about using theseats on raised surfaces, whichwas howmost of the new in-cidents occurred.

    Bumbo International, theSouth African maker of theseats, said it would provideowners with a repair kit to add astrap to secure babies in the seats something consumer groups hadbeen urging for months. The seats areused to prop up babies before they can situp on their own.

    Because its neither an infant carriernor a walker, the Bumbo seat isnt coveredby any federal or even industry standards.But the Consumer Product Safety Com-mission does have the authority to recall aproduct if it isnt covered by a safety stan-dard and presents a substantial producthazard, agency spokesman Scott Wolfsonsaid in March.

    Nancy Cowles, executive director ofadvocacy group Kids in Danger, questionsthe need for the seats at all, as they areonly recommended for babies from thetime they can hold their heads up untilthey can sit unassisted. Says Cowles: Itmight be better even with the fix to passon this product.

    Cowles and the Consumer Federation of

    Americas Rachel Weintraubrecommends parents insteadopt for infant carriers orbouncy seats, as both arecovered by voluntary safetystandards that require themto restrain children.Weintraub says adding re-

    straints to the Bumbo seats issignificant but says, Too many

    children were injured while using thisproduct.

    Erika Bowles, who is moving to Rich-mond, Va., just had a yard sale and sold theBumbo seat she used briefly for herdaughter, who is now 3. Bowles says shenever felt comfortable with the seat afterlearning of safety issues and seeing howher daughter could tip backwards in it.

    It wasnt worth the space of saving forpotential baby number two, says Bowles.

    The Bumbo seats, priced between $30and $50 each, were sold online and atstores including at Walmart and Toys R Usfrom August 2003 through August 2012.

    As of the recall date, all new Bumboseats will include the restraint belt. Someseats still in stores may include the re-straint repair kit, but most will have italready attached, Bumbo says.

    Jayne ODonnellUSA TODAY The Bumbo Baby

    Seat withrestraint-beltrepair. U.S.CONSUMER PRODUCT

    SAFETY COMMISSION

    4 million infant seats recalledafter babies are hurt in falls

  • 26 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    Tegan Beyer doesnt want her baby todrink formula. No way. No how.

    The 34-year-old married mother of twohas a track record on this issue. When shehad her son, Talon, four years ago, shewasnt able to get him to nurse at thebreast. So she pumped her milk everythree hours around the clock, producingenough to keep him well fed from a bottle.She pumped for 20 months.

    When daughter Joslyn arrived in Janu-ary and successfully latched on the firsttry, it was a joyous event.

    I produced a lot of milk, said Beyer, atattoo artist who lives in Mount Laurel,N.J. I was made for making milk.

    But Beyer cant nurse her baby any-more. On June 6, a suspicious lump shediscovered in her breast shortly afterJoslyns birth was at last diagnosed asinvasive ductal carcinoma. She was or-dered to stop nursing her baby immedi-ately and prepare for more tests, surgeryand chemotherapy.

    Beyer called her friend, Cristin Maho-ney of Cherry Hill, N.J., a breast-feedingmomwhose youngest daughter is justthree months older than Joslyn.

    She asked me if I had any breastmilk, said Mahoney. I did have 32 ouncesin my freezer, so I got that over to her.Since then, Ive been pumping everynight, enough to provide one bottle forJoslyn each day.

    It was the beginning of a monumentaleffort by a local community of breast-

    Some momswho cantnurse bankon breastmilk sharingBy KimMulfordGannett

    Tegan Beyer, 34, feeds her infant, 6-month-old Joslyn, a bottle of donated breast milk. Beyerwas recently diagnosed with breast cancer and is recovering from a bilateral mastectomy.GANNETTContinues on Page 28

    taking care of baby

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 27

  • 28 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    feeding mothers and their supporters.Since then, Beyers baby has been fed withdonated breast milk collected through aclosed group on Facebook.

    People have come out of the wood-work, said Beyer, during a phone inter-view from her hospital bed where she wasbattling an infection following a bilateralmastectomy. She drinks 30 ounces a dayright now.

    Its called informal milk sharing informal because the donated milk is notscreened, tested or processed to ensure itdoes not contain viruses, harmful bacteria,medications or illegal drugs. Instead, thearrangement relies on honesty, opennessand trust between its donors and recipi-ents.

    While the American Academy of Pedi-atrics and the U.S. Food and Drug Admini-stration recommend babies drink breastmilk for at least one year, both organiza-tions recommend against informal milksharing.

    Instead, says the FDA, after first con-

    sulting with your health care provider andif you have decided you still want to usehuman milk, you should only use milkfrom a source that has screened its milkdonors and taken other precautions toensure the safety of its milk.

    Thats hard to do when the nearest milkbank is in Ohio, and only dispenses milk tohospitals or with a doctors prescription,according to Diane Spatz, the leadingbreast-feeding expert at Childrens Hospi-tal of Philadelphia and a professor at theUniversity of Pennsylvania School ofNursing.

    Human milk costs about $4.25 perounce, Spatz said. That means it could cost$100 or more each day to feed a growingbaby and thats if the milk is available.

    We dont really have a sufficient num-ber of milk banks in the United States,said Spatz. Currently, theyre really justmeeting the needs of hospitalized babies.That puts women like (Beyer) in a reallychallenging position. They understand thevalue of human milk, they dont have ac-cess to milk banks and they dont have analternative to informal milk share.

    As a health care provider who prac-tices in the United States, its hard for meto recommend (milk sharing) as a practicebecause there could be risks associatedwith it, said Spatz. Its very understand-able that women do it.

    Long-standing practiceMilk sharing has been practiced since

    the beginning of time, its advocates say.Indeed, the World Health Organizationrecommends wet nursing (breast-feedinganother womans child) and milk sharingbefore using formula when emergenciesforce nursing mothers to stop breast-feeding. It recommends first testing donormothers for HIV.

    Im finding theres a lotof people looking for

    milk and people willingto travel for milk.

    NICOLE BURATTIcoordinator for Eats on Feets New Jersey,

    Sharing breast milkContinued from Page 26

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 29

    Eats on Feets, an online community ofmilk-sharing advocates, also offers a listof recommendations for arrangementsbetween milk donors and recipients, in-cluding specific blood tests and questionsto screen donors.

    Nicole Buratti, coordinator for Eats onFeets New Jersey, said demand is high fordonor milk, especially in New York andPennsylvania, though she has more donorsthan recipients at the moment.

    Im finding theres a lot of people look-ing for milk and people willing to travelfor milk, said Buratti.

    Myriad reasons parents seekdonor milk

    Usually, parents search out the donormilk for medical reasons that preventbreast-feeding, anything from lowmilksupply to breast cancer. Adoptive parentsand gay couples who have used a surro-gate to have a baby also sometimes seekout human milk for their babies.

    In other countries like Brazil andFrance, milk banks are much more acces-sible, making it easy to get donor milk,Spatz said.

    She wants to see more grassroots ef-forts to increase the number of milk banks

    in the United States so donor milk that hasbeen screened and treated is accessible toall women who need it. She also wantsinsurance companies to pay for breastmilk if it is needed.

    But the United States is a long wayfrom that ideal.

    Our culture isnt really at the point

    that we value human milk above all else,said Spatz, whose hospital views breastmilk as a medical intervention for its in-fant patients. A lot of people see formulaas an OK alternative.

    Despite the risks, Beyers network ofsupporters are passionate about the valueof their breast milk and their work to feedher baby.

    Breast milk contains antibodies andnutritive qualities that cannot be repli-cated by formula, they said.

    Thalla-Marie Choxi is one of the admin-istrators for Beyers milk sharing Face-book page, and a donor herself.

    In Beyers arrangement, Choxi said,mothers are asked to only donate milk ifthey would feed it to their own kids. Theyare also asked to alert the administratorsif they have taken any medications, andthey are asked not to donate if they drinkalcohol or smoke.

    Beyer said their work has enabled herto focus on getting better. Her baby girl ishealthy and growing fast.

    You do really have to trust people, butat the same time, its milk theyre feedingtheir own babies, Beyer said. If theyregoing to feed their babies, you have tohave faith. You have to have trust.

    We dont really have asufficient number of milkbanks in the United States.Currently, theyre really just

    meeting the needs ofhospitalized babies.

    DIANE SPATZa breast-feeding expert at Childrens Hospital ofPhiladelphia and a professor at the University of

    Pennsylvania School of Nursing

  • 30 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    Kids Voting needs volunteers

    ASHEVILLEKids Voting BuncombeCounty needs help to provide a real-lifevoting experience for Buncombe Countystudents on Election Day.

    The Nov. 6 election will have more than80 precincts. Kids Voting is looking to havea booth for youth votes at each site. Thenonpartisan, nonprofit organization islooking for volunteers to serve as precinctcaptains at these sites.

    Adults, high school students and fam-ilies can volunteer to be captains. Thosewishing to serve as captains must: attend abrief traning in October; recruit friends,family and colleagues to staff the KidsVoting booth from 7:30 a.m.-7:30 p.m. onElection Day; set up the booth; collectballots and materials and return them toElection Central (at 85 Mountain St.) afterthe polls close.

    For more information contact KidsVoting at 775-5673 or [email protected]

    Mother Earth Producelaunches school fundraiser

    ASHEVILLEMother Earth Produce,co-owned by former teacher Andrea Du-Vall, is offering a partnership to local WNCschools to support ongoing fundraising.

    Support Our Schools enables schools toraise funds, while supporting local farmsand businesses, as well as health in WNCscommunities. Schools can sign up withMother Earth Produce, a farm-to-frontdoor delivery service of organic produce

    and local edibles, to raise funds for theirschools by selling bins of produce andedibles.

    For the first 100 veggie bins sold, theschool receives $4 per bin, or $400. Schoolsreceive $2 per bin for any number of binssold after the initial 100 bins throughMay31, 2013. Schools must be within a 50-mileradius of Asheville to participate. Ordersfrom both new and repeat customers counttoward fundraising.

    To learn more and register, visitwww.MotherEarthProduce.com and clickon School Fundraising.

    Stroller Stridesfitness program starts

    ASHEVILLERegistration is under wayfor Stroller Strides of Asheville, classesthat offer both fitness and support for newmoms.

    Stroller Strides offers a great combina-tion of getting fit after the baby whileenjoying the support of other moms expe-riencing the newness, joys and challengesof motherhood, said Susanne Willis, owner

    of Stroller Strides of Asheville.Stroller Strides is a unique fitness pro-

    gram for newmoms incorporating both thebaby and stroller. In 60 minutes, partici-pants can get a total body workout thathelps improve cardiovascular endurance,strength and flexibility. Along with walk-ing, Stroller Strides uses the environmentas a gym by doing intervals of body toningusing exercise tubing and the stroller.

    The class registration ranges from asingle-class or 10-class pass to a monthlymembership. Classes are ongoing; registeranytime by contacting Willis at [email protected] or visitingwww.strollerstrides.net/asheville.

    Stroller Strides of Asheville also hosts afree Moms Club that schedules play-groups, moms night out, and quarterlycommunity service projects. Having agroup of parents who are going through thesame amazing and exhausting experienceof living with a baby is so important, saidWillis. If you have a great support system,everything else, including fitness, is somuch easier.

    parent news in brief

    StrollerStrides ofAshevilleoffers afitnessprogramusingstrollers andmore to newmoms. SPECIALTOWNC PARENT

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 31

  • 32 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    PREPARING FOR SCHOOL

    NASHVILLE, Tenn. Bhalika Rajan isartsy and instrumental. Her twin brother,Beema, is more into video games and theoutdoors.

    But as different as these two siblingsare, they are about face the same chal-lenge navigating middle school.

    Like many new sixth-graders, the Ra-jans are excited to begin a stage in life thatfeels more adult, but with cliques, crush-es, acne and pop quizzes, transitioning tothe locker-lined hallways can be as testingas it is educational.

    Over the last few weeks, as thousandsof tweens begin a new grade at a newschool, parents and students alike will

    learn what it means to be a middle school-er. They will adapt and adjust with somestrife and, hopefully, much more enjoy-ment.

    I do think it will be fun, said BhalikaRajan,. There are going to be more chal-lenges, and you get to face those chal-lenges. I find that fascinating.

    Big changes afootSometimes, mom Vicki Thompson said,

    the middle school transition is harder onthe parents than the kids.

    You really have to step back, she said.And, for a lot of parents, its the first timethey havent sat and helped with home-work at night or walked their kids to classevery day.

    Thompson, of Bellevue, Tenn., has al-

    ready made the transition once with hernow 15-year-old daughter, Piper, but shestill feels some anxiety as 9-year-old Paigebegins middle school this week.

    While elementary school is so insular,middle school is really the first major stepwhere students learn to deal with responsi-bility, different people and differentthings, Thompson said. The kids will ad-dress worries like mastering locker com-binations, mapping out unfamiliar hall-ways between classes, dealing with newteachers and a bigger workload.

    But perhaps the biggest transitioncomes in adjusting to new classmates,groups and activities.

    Theres just so many social chal-lenges, Thompson said.

    Middle schoolers are crazy. They are

    Middle school transition bringstweens, parents new challengesBy Jessica BlissThe Tennessean

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 33

    just a great big ball of raging hormones,and they dont know what to do with it.You have to help teach them that some ofthe things they think are the biggestdrama in their entire life are not that big.Thats hard to teach.

    Book offers guidance

    In her new novel, Lucy and CeCeesHow to Survive (and Thrive) in Middle

    Sudha Rajan, second from right, helps her son Beema, 11, try on new clothes as theyprepare for the first day of school as father Naga and sister Bhalika look on at their homein Franklin, Tenn. THE TENNESSEAN

    MIDDLE SCHOOL SURVIVALGUIDEWhat: Lucy and CeCees How to Survive (andThrive) in Middle School, by Kimberly DanaWhere: BarnesandNoble.com andAmazon.comCost: $17.95 (iUniverse)

    Tips on the transitionBe informed: Becoming familiar with newsurroundings is important, said Franklin, Tenn.,dad Naga Rajan, who has a rising high schoolsophomore in addition to 11-year-old twinsBhalika and Beema. Get to know the school,Rajan said. Go to the website and attendparent orientation sessions. Take the kids tothe student orientation session and talk tocounselors to find out what you can expect.Get organized: Talk about responsibility, saidLori Eggleston, a high school guidance counsel-or. Encourage them to write assignments in aday planner immediately.Have fun: And get involved, she said. Col-leges do want GPA and test scores, but theyalso want to know you get along with peopleand contribute to community. And school ismore than just reading and writing, theres alot of fun stuff, too.

    Continues on Page 34

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    School, teacher Kimberly Dana attemptsto impart a few of those lessons with abook for pre-teens that she said is funnyand also authentic and useful.

    Dana, a middle school English teacherin Nashville, Tenn., reveals what happensin the hallowed halls of junior highthrough the eyes of two radically differentcharacters: CeCee, the shy and studiousgirl, and Lucy, her impulsive and boy-crazy BFF. The girls chatter through notesthey pass in school, personal diary entriesand lists they make lots and lots of listsabout everything from how to handle gos-sip to homework excuses. Sprinkledthroughout is tween-esque lingo like un-hinged and mega-ancient.

    Dana who said eighth-grade algebrawas the bane of my existence and, forbetter or worse, her social life was No. 1supplements the book with her own obser-vations, as well as real stories from her18-year teaching career. The result is alighthearted novel that also tackles seriousissues like cyber bullying, boyfriends,eating disorders and self-esteem.

    These kids are evolving, Dana said.They are neither child nor adult theyare in the middle. They are growing upsocially, academically and mentally, andits a very confusing time.

    This book is a big hug. It says, Itsgoing to be tough, but you can do it.

    Sweet freedomEleven-year-old Logan Eggleston does

    have a few worries about middle school more classwork, more homework andmore tests, for example. She also is notlooking forward to going from being theoldest in the school as a fifth-grader to thebottom of the ranks again in middle school.

    Now were right back to being theyounger ones, she said. But, she is eagerto see her friends and start a new school.I feel older because I get a locker now,she said.

    Her mom, Lori, also is excited. Loganhas made lots of connections with futureclassmates through the sports she is in-volved in, Lori Eggleston said, and Lorifeels good about her daughters organiza-tional skills and ability to prioritize. Thebiggest learning curve for Logan may bethe autonomy she is given.

    They just grow so much, said Lori, ahigh-school guidance counselor. Loganmay be really surprised at the level offreedoms that they have in middle school.

    Tween transitionContinued from Page 33

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 35

    As the weather cools and autumn arrives, we asked second-graders in Linda Rogers classat Hendersonville Elementary what they like best about fall. Here is what they told us:

    My sister and I like tothrow colorful leaves intothe air. It is very, very funwhen we run throughthem.

    Mellany, 7

    Fall is a beautiful sea-son. I like when the leaveschange and the cool windblows in my face.

    Garrett, 7 1/2

    I like fall because squir-rels scatter in my yard look-ing for nuts. Thousands ofthem live in our trees.

    Ava, 7 1/2

    The thing I like bestabout fall is that you canclimb trees. It is easierbecause there are barelyany leaves on the trees.

    Maci, 7

    In the fall, my dad trimsthe leaves every month. Hepiles them up and I like tojump in the leaves andthrow them up in the air.

    Lily, 7

    In the fall you can seethe stunning colors of theleaves. We can feel the gen-tle breeze of the fall.

    Ingram, 8

    I like fall because foot-ball season comes. I like towatch CamNewton maketouchdowns.

    Sam, 7

    I like jumping in leaves.They splatter everywhere. Itmakes your yard colorful.

    Anthony, 8

    I like fall because Hallow-een comes. I go house to houseand get awesome candy. I eatevery bit!

    Mason, 7

    I like fall becauseThanksgiving comes inNovember. I like the smellof the yummy dinner mydad and mom cook.

    Gabriela, 7

    What I like about fall isHalloween. Halloween is a funtime when you scare people.Last year, I scared mymom!

    Allie, 7

    In the fall, my friendsand I like to play in my yardwith our dogs in the coolbreeze. One is a Chihuahua,one is a dachsund and one isa Shih Tzu.

    Amaya, 7

    kids voices

    Fall favorites

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    Aug. 31-Sept. 3N.C. APPLE FESTIVAL: Street fair with arts andcrafts, food, entertainment, apples, childrens activ-ities and more on Main Street in downtown Hen-dersonville. Schedule of events online at www.ncap-plefestival.org.

    Aug. 31-Sept. 1SMOKYMOUNTAIN FOLK FESTIVAL: Two nightsof traditional Southern Appalachian music anddance beginning at 6:30 p.m. in Stuart Auditoriumat Lake Junaluska. Children's show with songs andstories. Refreshments available. Visit www.smoky-mountainfolkfestival.com.

    Sept. 1-2LEXINGTON AVENUE ARTS AND FUN FESTIVAL:Art, food, performers and more on Lexington Ave-nue in downtown Asheville. Visit www.lexfestashe-ville.com.

    Sept. 2MILE HIGH KITE FESTIVAL: Annual festival inBeech Mountain. 10 a.m. Free admission; free kitesto the first 150 children younger than 13. Kite clubswill demonstrate flying techniques, staff clinics andhelp visitors build their own kites. Visitwww.beechmtn.com or call 800-468-5506.

    Sept. 7-16NCMOUNTAIN STATE FAIR: Family oriented agri-cultural fair with competitions, displays, midwaygames, food and more at the WNC Ag Center inFletcher. Friday and Saturday from 9 a.m.-midnight,Sunday from 9 a.m.-11 p.m., Monday-Thursday 3p.m.-11 p.m. Tickets are $7 for adults, $3 for ages6-12 and 65 plus. Group discounts available. Visitwww.mountainfair.org.

    Starting Sept. 7ELIADA FIELDS OF FUN CORNMAZE: Corn mazeon campus of Eliada Home in West Asheville. Visitwww.fieldsoffun.org.

    Sept. 8KIDFEST: Guided hikes, games, storytellers, musicand more at Grandfather Mountain. 9 a.m.-4 p.m.Visit www.grandfather.com.

    Sept. 15MOUNTAIN LIFE FESTIVAL: Demonstrations in-cluding soap making, hearth cooking, cane mill,apple butter, cider and more. At Oconoluftee VisitorCenter, Great Smoky Mountains National Park.www.nps.gov/grsm

    Sept. 15-16HERITAGEWEEKEND: 32nd annual event at FolkArt Center with sheep shearing demonstrations,experts on beekeeping, rifle making, coopering,

    heritage toy making, natural dyeing, spinning andmore. World Gee HawWhimmy Diddle competitionis 2-3 p.m. Sept. 15. Visit www.southernhighland-guild.org.

    Sept. 22FALL INTO THE FARM: A free family festival at CarlSandburg Home National Historic Site in Flat Rock.Programs include square dancing, dairy goat dem-

    onstrations, bird walks, nature tours and more. 10a.m.-3 p.m. Visit www.nps.gov/carl.MILL AROUND THE VILLAGE: Festival celebratingthe heritage of bluegrass music and other Appa-lachian specialties. Includes childrens activities. AtBeacon Mill Village, Swannanoa. Visit www.milla-roundthevillage.com.OLD TIMEY DAY: Henderson County Curb Marketsevent with sausage and ham biscuits cooked on awood stove, music, antique display, demonstrationsand more. 8 a.m.-2 p.m. at the Henderson CountyCurb Market. Call 692-8012 for more information.YOUTH ARTS FESTIVAL: 9 a.m.-3 p.m. at JacksonCounty Green Energy Park, Dillsboro. Visitwww.jcgep.org.

    Sept. 28-Oct. 27GHOST TRAIN: Tweetsie Railroads 23rd annualcelebration, Fridays and Saturdays through Oct. 27.After dark, see Halloween characters and GhostTrain engineer Casey Bones, visit the haunted house,go trick-or-treating. Visit www.tweetsie.com.

    Sept. 29-30FLOCK TO THE ROCK: Learn about the birds ofChimney Rock. Weekend of birding events includingguided walks, workshops ranging from bird photog-raphy to hummingbirds, hawk watches, familynature walks and kids activities. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Sept.29 and 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Sept. 30. Free with admission.Visit www.chimneyrockpark.com.

    Oct. 2-6100th ANNUAL INDIAN FAIR: Entertainment,midway games, food, traditional and contemporary

    FAMILY-FRIENDLY FALL EVENTS

    George Buckner and Carol Rifkin performwith Pauls Creek Band at a past HeritageWeekend at the Blue Ridge ParkwaysFolk Art Center. The 32nd annual event isSept. 15-16 and features traditional music,dancing and heritage craftdemonstrations. JOHN FLETCHER/[email protected]

    Stilt-walker Sita Luna makes her way down Lexington Avenue as part of the LexingtonAvenue Arts and Fun Festival, or LAAFF, which is Sept. 1-2. JOHN FLETCHER/[email protected]

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 37

    arts and crafts. At Cherokee Indian Fair Grounds, U.S.441, Cherokee. Visit www.visitcherokeenc.com.

    Oct. 6FARM CITY DAY: Antique and modern farm equip-ment, music, square dancing, clogging, food, pettingzoo, more. 10 a.m.-4 p.m., Jackson Park, Henderson-ville. Visit www.historichendersonville.orgGREAT PUMPKIN PATCH EXPRESS:Weekendsthrough October at Great Smoky Mountain Rail-roads Bryson City depot. Meet the Peanuts charac-ters, select a pumpkin, hay rides, live music, storytell-ing, more. Wear costumes and trick-or-treat. Ticketprices include admission to model trains museum.Starting Oct. 6, train rides 3 p.m. Fridays (startingOct. 12), 11:30 a.m. and 3 p.m. Saturday and Sunday.$53, $31 age 2-12. Visit www.gsmr.com or call 488-7000 or 800-872-4681.HEY DAY: 36th annual fall family festival withgames, crafts, music, animals and more. 10 a.m.-5p.m. at WNC Nature Center, 75 Gashes Creek Road,Asheville. Call 298-5600 or visit www.wncnaturecen-ter.com.

    Oct. 6-7LAND OF OZ: Tour the old Land of Oz theme park.Hayride or shuttle from Beech Mountain to enchant-ed forest with live music, tour of Dorothys house, anOz museum and more. Trips at 10 a.m., noon and 2p.m. Tickets are $16.50 in advance, $20 day of (ages 2and under free). Not accessible to wheelchairs orlarge strollers. Visit www.autumnatoz.com.

    Oct. 12-14, 19-21& 26-28:STINGY JACKS PUMPKIN PATCH: Fall festivalfeaturing Stingys Illuminated Pumpkin Trail created

    by local artists out of pumpkins that light up when thesun goes down. At Mountains & Meadows EventsCenter at Turkey Pen, 324 McGuire Road, Pisgah Forest.Visit www.stingyjackspumpkinpatch.com

    Oct. 13MINERAL CITY HERITAGE FESTIVAL: Food, crafts,childrens activities and more, Spruce Pine. Visitwww.sprucepinefestivals.comMOUNTAIN GLORY FESTIVAL: Street festival with artsand crafts, food, quilt show, childrens area, more. InMarion. Visit www.mtngloryfestival.com

    Oct. 13-14OKTOBERFEST: Food, music, crafts, lift rides, childrensactivities and more at Sugar Mountain Resort. Visitwww.skisugar.com

    Oct. 18-21CRAFT FAIR OF THE SOUTHERN HIGHLANDS: U.S.Cellular Center. www.southernhighlandguild.org.LAKE EDEN ARTS FESTIVAL:Weekend of art, musicand outdoor fun at Camp Rockmont in Black Moun-tain. Visit www.theleaf.com.

    Oct. 19-20PUMPKINFEST: Hayrides, trick-or-treating, a pumpkinroll, more, in Franklin. Call 524-2516 or visitwww.pumpkinfestfranklin.com.

    The North Carolina Apple Festivals KingApple Parade marks the final day of theHendersonville festival, which runs Aug.31-Sept. 2. ERIN BRETHAUER/[email protected]

    Continues on Page 38

    CORNMAZESBLUE RIDGE CORNMAZE: Six-acre maze at 1605 Everett Road,Pisgah Forest. Times by appoint-ment, Monday-Friday; 2-8 p.m.Saturday-Sunday. $7 for ages 13and up, $5 for ages 6-12, free for 5and under. Group rates. Visitwww.blueridgecornmaze.com orcall 226-0508.COLDMOUNTAIN CORNMAIZE:4168 Pisgah Drive, along N.C. 110,south of Canton. Opens Sept. 15,4-9 p.m. Wednesday-Friday and1-9 p.m. Saturday-Sunday throughNov. 1. Admission $8 for ages 4and older. Haunted maze opensOct. 1. Group rates. Call 648-8575or visit www.themaize.com.ELIADA FIELDS OF FUNMAZE:Twisting trails, with a small story-book trail with the story of Spook-ley the Square Pumpkin, at 2Compton Drive, Asheville. OpenSept. 7-Oct. 28. Visit www.field-soffun.org.

  • 38 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    Oct. 20APPLE HARVEST FESTIVAL: 24th annual eventwith arts, crafts, entertainment, food and apples.10 a.m.-5 p.m. in downtownWaynesville. Visitwww.haywood-nc.com

    Oct. 20-21WOOLLYWORM FESTIVAL: Arts and crafts,music, food, the woolly worm races and more. 9a.m.-5 p.m. Oct. 20 and 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Oct. 21. Indowntown Banner Elk. Visit www.woollyworm-.com.

    Oct. 21HARDLOX: Jewish food and heritage festival,with traditional music and dance, crafts, food,childrens activities. From11 a.m.-4 p.m. at PackSquare Park, downtown Asheville. Visit www.har-dloxjewishfestival.org

    Oct. 25-27FALL HARVEST DAYS: Crafters, demonstrations,farm tools, antique engines, antique tractor pulls,more. At WNC Agricultural Center. $8 per day,children under 12 free with paid adult. Visitwww.applecountry.org.

    Oct. 27BEARY SCARY HALLOWEEN: Crafts, natureprogram, costume contest and more, 10 a.m.-3p.m. at Grandfather Mountain. Visit www.grand-father.com.HALLOWEEN CARNIVAL: Games, face painting,prizes and costume contest. Kates Park in Fletcher.Call 687-0751 or visit www.fletcherparks.org.HALLOWEENFEST: Tiny tot pumpkin bowl, cookiedecorating, inflatables, costume parade, haymaze, trick-or-treat, pumpkin patch, 5K race andfun walk. In downtown Brevard. Call 884-3278.

    HOWL-O-WEEN: Games, presentations, crafts andmore at the WNC Nature Center. Come in costume.From10 a.m.-4 p.m. Visit www.wncnaturecenter-.com.PUNKIN FEST: Costume parade and trick-or-treat-ing in Dillsboro. Visit www.visitdillsboro.org.

    Oct. 31TRICK-OR-TREAT STREET: 4:30-7:30 p.m. at gazeboon Main Street, downtown Hendersonville. WithHalloween costume contest for children and petsand the Monster Mash entertainment.

    WNC NatureCenter hostsits 36thannual HeyDay event onOct. 6. COLBYRABON/WNC

    PARENT PHOTO

    FALL EVENTSContinued from Page 37

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 39

    We dont participatein your insurance plan.Your total is $171.

    If Id had a drink inmymouth, I would havespewed it across thecounter like one of TheThree Stooges.

    We were on a long weekend vacation one of those school is about to start andwhere did the summer go getaways when my daughter came down with an earinfection. We knew from past experiencethat she needed prescription ear drops andfortunately, we have a good relationshipwith our pediatrician, who believed usenough to call the pharmacy.

    So the tiny, thumb-sized bottle of eardrops was $171. Ultimately, we went downthe street to a pharmacy that accepted ourinsurance and we paid $25. Retrieving ourpresumably gold-infused vial of drops, I

    overheard a dad with a similar plight. Aprescription for his son was going to cost$245. No thanks, he said.

    After breathing a prayer of thanks formy husbands job and our terrific healthinsurance, I thought about what I would doif I had to shell out hundreds or thousandsof dollars every time one of my children gotsick. I wouldnt be able to do long weekendsat the beach, thats for sure. Heck, I mightnot be able to buy groceries. My kids areteenagers now, so it would have been expo-nentially worse when they were little, witha propensity to play host to every new virusand bacteria they encountered.

    It also made me realize that I have be-come insulated in a way I wasnt when Ipracticed law. Daily, I worked with peoplefor whom a steady income was all but im-possible. They thought things like healthinsurance and a primary care provider fortheir sick kids were laughable conceptsthat were reserved for rich people. (I dontfeel rich. Perhaps thats the problem.) Ev-ery day, I left work feeling thankful that I

    could help in some small way and thankful,too, that I didnt walk in their shoes.

    There, but for the grace of God, go I. Itwas mymantra. Its one Ive forgotten outhere in suburbia, shopping at Whole Foodsand IKEA, having organic produce deliv-ered to my doorstep and grumbling aboutinconsequential things like how the restau-rant forgot my order of tofu curry and howslowmy Internet connection is today.

    For that, I am ashamed of myself. Dontmisinterpret: I am a firm believer in cap-italism and the free market, but for me, itseasy to slip into complacency and comfort,with blinders blocking out anything outsidemy household. Those hurting out of mysight are all too frequently out of mind.

    Thats not what I am called to do as ahuman or as a parent, and thats certainlynot what I want to teach my children. Andso we dig out and reach out, a bit at a time.

    Chris Worthy is an attorney who took down hershingle to be a stay-at-home mom. Contact her [email protected]

    growing together

    By Chris WorthyWNC Parent columnist

    Getting out of your familys shell

  • 40 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 41

  • 42 W N C P A R E N T | S E P T E M B E R 2 0 1 2

    Did you take afamily vacation thissummer? If so, per-haps you traveledby plane. If so, per-haps you noticedhow hazardous fly-ing is for smallpeople. Well, not the flying part. If youmade it into the air congratulations!You successfully navigated the realdanger zone for children: the airport.

    Many malpractice law firms haveadded airport injuries to their list ofspecialties. Huge numbers of peopletravel through airports each day some on foot, some on escalators andelevators, some on vehicles and manyof them in a hurry. In this fast-pacedenvironment, accidents happen. Littleguys are the most susceptible.

    First, most airlines charge fees to

    check luggage, so more travelers arecarrying bags onto planes. Big bags. On arecent trip to Connecticut, I saw one ofthese monsters fall off the conveyor beltand land on a ladys foot. Thank goodnessit didnt fall on a child.

    Second, the security line essentiallyrequires passengers to get naked. Peopleripping off leather jackets, bulky com-puter bags swinging off shoulders, foot-wear flying into buckets, belts unsheath-ing and snapping like lassos the sceneresembles a pre-rumble of well-dressedpeople. Best to keep your children close,lest they catch a boot to the head or a beltbuckle to the eye. Smart bet: Bring ashield.

    Make it through security and you en-ter Digital Distractionville. Having beenseparated from their cellphones in secu-rity purgatory, folks are now frantic toreconnect. Its amazing how many Grou-pon emails you can miss in four minutes.Plop a small child down in Digital Dis-tractionville, and they will be gone in 60

    seconds, steamrollered by what I calliPeople a hybrid of human and iPhone.

    If your child safely navigates the iPe-ople, surely she will be clipped by atransportation vehicle. On any givenday, the Charlotte airport looks like apublic golf course on Saturday morning.Only the airport carts look more likeHummers, carry 8+ people, and average15 mph. These vehicles are better suitedto Fast Track at EPCOT. Advice for keep-ing your little ones safe: Leash them. Beready to pull when you hear loud beeping.

    What if your flight is delayed? Themeal you thought you were going to eatwhen you got to your destination will nowcome from the airport. Popular choices:Sbarro, Dunkin Donuts and Panda Ex-press. Thats like choosing among bad,worse and worst. To be fair, most airportsdo offer at least one healthy eatery, but itmay be in a different terminal, whichcould require a golf cart. (Better to be onone than hit by one.) Advice: Bringenough food to keep the kids happy for

    Airports are hazardous to small peopleBy Scott TiernanWNC Parent columnist

    dads view

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 43

    four or more hours.Finally, the stampede. Weve all been

    there. The call is made for boardingZone 1, and people start popping out ofseats and charging like theyve beencalled down on The Price is Right.Toting their humungous carry-ons, theymake for the counter like fleas to a dog,oblivious to anything and any(small)onearound them. Advice: Board last andgate-check your bags.

    From here youre safe. Find yourseats, get the kids buckled in, and send26 texts before the flight attendant re-minds you that all cellular devices mustbe turned off during take off. Just hopethe person sitting next to your allergic-to-shellfish daughter hasnt brought on athree-course meal of prawns, lobsterstails and shrimp. And be wary of thedrink cart that fits down the aisle like asize 10 foot in a size 9.5 shoe. Your childis one dangling ankle away from a trip tothe ER after you land. At least there willbe a golf cart waiting at the airport togive you a ride.

    Scott Tiernan is an education and communica-tions consultant and a freelance writer. Readmore at http://scott-tiernan.blogspot.com.

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    Parents and other caregivers whodemean, bully, humiliate or otherwiseemotionally abuse children may not knowthe harm they can cause and often do notget the help that they and their childrenneed, says a new report from the Amer-ican Academy of Pediatrics.

    Psychological maltreatment is just asharmful as other types of maltreatment,says a report in an August issue of Pediat-rics. Yet it is not rec-ognized, understoodor studied as much asphysical or sexualabuse, says a team ofauthors that includesmembers of theAmerican Associationof Child and Adoles-cent Psychiatry.

    Even experts canstruggle to tease outwhen words or actionscross the line fromless-than-ideal par-enting to emotionalabuse, says co-authorRoberta Hibbard, director of child protec-tion programs at Indiana University andRiley Hospital for Children, Indianapolis.It is abuse when an interaction betweena parent and child inflicts harm andcauses difficulty with the childs emotion-al well-being and development, she says.Anything from repeated insults to threatsto ignoring a child may qualify. But youreally cant pinpoint and say that the onetime that you called the child stupid isthe reason they are having these prob-lems, she says.

    The report, which updates one issuedin 2000, says emotional abuse:

    Is linked with mental illness, delin-quency, aggression, school troubles andlifelong relationship problems amongthose who were abused.

    Can be especially harmful in the firstthree years of life.

    May be the most common form ofchild maltreatment.

    But theres little research on prevent-ing emotional abuse or helping mistreatedchildren, the report says.

    Parents can inflictemotional harm,not realize itBy Kim PainterSpecial for USA TODAY

    HALLMARKSOF ABUSEEmotional abusecan include ignor-ing, verbally as-saulting, over-pressuring, bully-ing, rejecting,isolating (keeping achild away fromothers).Source: Prevent Child

    Abuse America

  • W N C P A R E N T . C O M 45

    Silliness is fun. It canbe in a song or a joke. Itcan be in a riddle or adance. Sometimes silli-ness is in a facial ex-pression.

    There are no betterdiscerners of silliness than kids. Kids whoenjoy being silly are open to the experi-ence and not embarrassed by it. Thesebooks are for them.

    What I Do with Vegetable Glue byauthor Susan Chandler and illustratorElena Odriozola tells the extravagantlysilly story of a little girl who runs intotrouble when she refuses to eat anythingbut cake.

    She is not tempted by freshness orgreenness: I wouldnt eat cabbage,/Orturnips or beans,/I didnt like carrots,/Ididnt like greens. As a result of her stub-born, unhealthy eating habits, randompieces of her body start falling off: an armhere, her head there.

    The problem is that her body is out ofvegetable glue, the stuff that keeps all thebody parts together. If only she could play,sneeze and cough without having to worryabout pieces of herself ending up on theground!

    Preschoolers will enjoy the humor inthe girls outrageous predicament, and willlike guessing what the cure is. What I Dowith Vegetable Glue makes a good pointand will keep readers giggling while itdoes so.

    If All the Animals Came Inside byauthor Eric Pinder and illustrator MarcBrown is wish fulfillment from a kidspoint of view. A little boy imagines what itwould be like if wild animals came to liveat his house.

    Sure, The walls would tremble. Thewindows would shake. Oh, what a terriblemess we would make! But riding an ele-phant and playing hide-and-seek withmonkeys makes up for it.

    The story continues with messy snackswith a skunk and panda, taking a bath withan octopus, and watching TV with a rhi-noceros family.

    Toward the end of the day, the inconve-nience and mess of having so many animalvisitors begins to wear on the boys nerves,which is why it is a good