what to do about bullies - adult protective services · 2013-10-10 · cyber-bullying e-mail cell...
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What to do About Bullies
In Long Term Care Settings
Lori Goetz and Sandra Newbauer,Minnesota Board on Aging
Office of Ombudsman for Long Term CareJune 2013
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Definition
Bullying is intentional repetitive aggressive behavior involving an imbalance of power or strength
Includes verbal, physical or antisocial behavior that occurs in the context of social relationships that cause emotional distress
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Verbal Bullying
Name calling
Teasing
Insults
Taunting
Threats
Being bossed
Sarcastic remarks
Pointed jokes
Loud arguments
Targeting
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Non-Verbal Bullying
Mimicking one’s walk or disability
Making offensive gestures or facial expressions
Turning one’s head away when the other person speaks
Using threatening body language
Encroaching on personal space
Disrespectful
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Cyber-Bullying
Cell phone pictures
Texting
Facebook/Twitter
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Antisocial Bullying
Shunning, excluding or ignoring
Gossiping
Spreading rumors
Negative non-verbal language
Hounding people for money or cigarettes
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Bully Dynamics in LTC Settings Resident Resident
Resident Staff
Resident Family
Staff Staff
Staff Resident
Staff Family
Family Resident
Family Staff
Family Family
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Why Does Bullying Occur in Long Term Care Settings?
Resources are shared
Closer quarters
Childhood behavior problems continue into adulthood
Vulnerabilities
Fear
Change
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Characteristics of Those Who are Bullied
Defenseless
Powerless
Passive◦ Emotional, anxious, insecure, shy…
Provocative◦ Annoying, irritating, poor boundaries…
Dementia, developmental or neurological disorder
Social status
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Intolerance of Social Status
Dementia
Mental Health or Disability
Sexual Orientation
Race or ethnicity
Gender
Economic Status
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Characteristics of Bullies
Low self esteem
Need for power and control at the expense of others
Difficulty tolerating individual differences
Lack of empathy
Few positive social relationships
Loss (income, loved ones, independence, social status)
Don’t fit in
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Circumstances that contribute to Bullying Behavior
Medications
Dementia
Anger
Emotional pain
Physical pain
Loneliness and loss
Fear
Feeling entitled
Lack of control
Lost abilities and functions
Resentment for life circumstances
Jealousy
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The Impact of Bullying
For Person Bullied For Consumers & Staff
Reduced self esteem
Feeling of rejection
Depression
More health problems
Functional changes
Thoughts of suicide
Problems eating and sleeping
Isolation
Creates culture of fear, disrespect and insecurity
Threatens staff loyalty and retention
May contribute to retaliatory bullying
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Solutions for Individuals
Research bullying to differentiate actual bullying or temporary moods
Remember this is not your fault
Confide in someone close
Discuss with professionals, advocates or clergy
Develop a support network
Document incidents, times and dates to create record and verify pattern
Use “I” statements and try to be kind, gentle and understanding with bully
Be assertive in early stages
Keep distance and walk away if necessary
Enlist help from reliable source
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The Cycle of Bullying Adapted from: msn.com
The Bully
Defender and Passive Defender who tries to help
the Victim
Disengaged Onlooker
Supporters and Passive Supporters
Follower or Henchman
The Victim
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Systemic Solutions to Bullying
Resident, tenant and family councils
Rules and expectations for consumers and staff
Partnerships between consumers, staff and community
Education (tolerance, conflict resolution and bullying awareness)
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To ensure
A Bully Free Zone
Clear policies, procedures and
lease agreements
with consequences
for bullying that are enforced
Training for staff, resident, tenant
and family councils to
identify bullying and act
responsibly to protect oneself
and others
Identify Hot Spots and
develop steps to create a
community culture of
respect, dignity and diversity
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References
http://www.examiner.com
http://www.stopbullying.gov
http://bullyingstatisctics.com
http://voices.yahoo
http://www.retirement-living.com
http://www.mybetternursinghome.com
http://www.aarp.org
http://kcboomeragent.blogspot.com
http://www.agingcare.com
http://www.metrowestdailynews.com
http://www.pacer.org