What Did You Say? !

Intercultural Expectations, Misunderstandings, and Communication

!Greetings! I am pleased

to see that we are different. May we together become greater

than the sum of both of us. !

Surak in the Savage Curtain episode of Star Trek !

Frederick Zarndt

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it

has taken place.

George Bernard Shaw,1925 Nobel Peace Prize for Literature.

?

• I most enthusiastically recommend this candidate with no qualifications whatsoever.

What did you say?

• In my opinion you will be very fortunate to get this person to work for you.

What did you say?

• Please revert as soon as possible.

What did you say?

What does this mean?

Fine for Parking

Here

What do you see?

The young girlis turning away...

The old womanis very sad...

What do you see?

Why (better) communication is necessary

Wiio's laws of (mis-)communication

Osmo A Wiio in “Wiion lait - ja vähän muidenkin” cf. http://www.cs.tut.fi/~jkorpela/wiio.html

1. Communication usually fails, except by accident

1. If communication can fail, it will

2. If communication cannot fail, it still most usually fails

3. If communication seems to succeed in the intended way, there's a misunderstanding

4. If you are content with your message, communication certainly fails

2. If a message can be interpreted in several ways, it will be interpreted in a manner that maximizes the damage

3. There is always someone who knows better than you what you meant with your message

Osmo A Wiio in “Wiion lait - ja vähän muidenkin” cf. http://www.cs.tut.fi/~jkorpela/wiio.html

4. The more we communicate, the worse communication succeeds.

1. The more we communicate, the faster misunderstandings propagate.

5. In mass communication, the important thing is not how things are but how they seem to be.

6. The importance of a news item is inversely proportional to the square of the distance.

7. The more important the situation is, the more probably you forget an essential thing that you remembered a moment ago.

Wiio's laws of (mis-)communication

Exercise: Introductions

• Introduce yourself and say where you were born

• Say one thing about you that you really like

• Say one thing about you that you don’t so much like

• Tell one unique thing shared by all / most members of your native culture that is different from other cultures

• Do this is 2 minutes or less!

Goals

Personal goal: Through my behaviour in thought, word, and deed to be and to become a better person

Business goal: Everyone wins as measured by the 4 way test*

1. Is it the truth? 2. Is it fair to all concerned? 3. Will it build goodwill and better friendships? 4. Will it be beneficial to all concerned?

Your goals?

* Adapted from Herbert Taylor’s 4 way test. See http://www.rotary.org

Simple principles for communication

1. Be impeccable with your word

2. Don’t take anything personally

3. Don’t make assumptions

4. Always do your best

5. Be mindful

Adapted from The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz

The basic human

Genetic difference at most 0.5%

• Estimated number of neurons in an adult human brain 10,000,000,000 (1011)*

!• Estimated number of synapses in an adult human brain:

100,000,000,000,000 (1014) !

• Estimated number of synaptic connections for each neuron: 7,000 !• Number of combinations of n (1011) neurons with s (7000) synapses

C (n, s) = C (1011, 7000) is very large (for example, the number of combinations of n (52) cards taken 5 at a time C (52,5) is 2,598,960

* Another estimate is 86 x 109 total neurons, 16.3 x 109 in the cerebral cortex and 69 x 109 in the cerebellum.

Genes, neurons, and synapses: How humans are different

• Humans have about 3,000,000 nucleotides. Maximum genetic variation based on

!• single nucleotide polymorphism is 0.1% or 1 difference in 1000

base pairs • copy number variation resulting from deletions, insertions,

inversions, and duplications is 0.4% !

• Total maximum genetic difference between two randomly selected humans is ~0.5%.

!• Genetic difference between human and chimpanzee is ~4%.

Genes, neurons, and synapses: How humans are alike

Reticular activating system

!The Reticular Activating System (RAS) is a structure common to mammals that is necessary for consciousness to occur.

RAS filters data coming to your mind so that your perception of events agrees with your past experience.

Everything you see, hear, smell, feel and touch is a message entering your brain. RAS filters through all these messages and decides which ones will get attention from your consciousness.

Midbrain

Pons

RASMedulla

Exercise (+)

Noise (+)

Basic human nature

Physical Vehicle comprised of “meat” body and its needs. (Latin physica ‘things relating to nature’.)

Emotional Motivational force for human activities. (Latin emovere ‘move’.)

Mental Sets goals, creates problems, solves problems. (Latin mens ‘mind’, Indo-European / Sanskrit ‘revolve in the mind, think’.)

Spiritual Relationship to creator. (Latin spirare ‘breathe’.)

Regardless of culture, humans have 4 basic natures. With only slight racial and geographic differences, the physical body is the same for all cultures. How humans meet their physical needs -- water, food, shelter, procreation -- and fulfill their emotional, mental, and spiritual natures differs from culture to culture and from person to person.

Basic human activities

Relationship Manner in which one connects to and interacts with other humans. (Latin referre ‘bring back’.)

Work Physical and mental activity intended to achieve a purpose or result or to create something.

Recreation Activities done for enjoyment and to re - create oneself. (Latin recreare ‘to create again, renew’.)

Devotion Activities to fulfill and develop spiritual nature. (Latin devotionem ‘to dedicate by a vow’.)

Basic physical needs -- water, food, shelter, procreation -- are fulfilled in variety of culture specific ways. Once these needs are met, humans from every culture engage in 4 fundamental activities.

Culture is like the color of your eyes: You cannot hide it and can change it only with difficulty, and although you yourself cannot see it, it is always visible to others when you interact with them.

Culture Any knowledge passed from one generation to the next, not necessarily with respect to human beings. Culture is a collective phenomenon shared with people within the same social environment.

Culture is learned, it is not innate.

Culture is different from personality but the border between culture and personality is fuzzy.

Definitions of culture

Culture

Personality

Human Nature

Learned

Inherited and Learned

Inherited

Specific to Individual

Specific to Group

Universal

Levels of mental programming

Cultural expectations

Cultures similar Cultures different

Behaviors and values

Culture stereotypes

Advantages of stereotypes Disadvantages of stereotypesPrediction of cultural behaviors Stereotypical behavior does not match real

behavior

Illuminates intent Expected intent disguises real intent

Helps one avoid giving offense

Ability to put things in conceptual categories is fundamental to perception.

Exercise: Cultural stereotypes

Think of a cultural stereotype from your own or from another culture. Think of advantages, disadvantages, and dangers of the stereotype.

…realize that there is no color in the natural world and no sounds — nothing of this kind; no textures, no patterns, no beauty, no scent…. the “world out there” is synthesized in our consciousness.

Sir John Eccles,1963 Nobel Peace Prize for Medicine.

Perception

To become conscious of or aware of through the senses (Latin perceptiōn or perciptio: comprehension, taking in)

Process of perception

1. Observation

2. Interpretation

3. Evaluation or judgement

He mustbe late...

That manis running

Those foreignersare always in

a hurry!

Perception: ObservationPerception: JudgementPerception: Interpretation?

Exercise: Judgement

Think of one of your own judgements about someone else or a judgement that you witnessed. It may have been the result of your own personal or cultural programming or the result of your assumptions about a situation, relationship, or the circumstances.

Some more equal than others: Power distance

Power distance is the extent to which the less powerful members of an organization within a country expect and accept that power is distributed unequally.

Small power distance

DirectorEmployee

Large power distance

DirectorEmployee

Small power distance Large power distance

Inequalities among people should be minimized Inequalities among people are expected and desired

Hierarchy in organizations means an inequality of roles, established for convenience

Hierarchy in organizations reflects existential inequality between higher and lower levels

Managers rely on their own experience and on subordinates Managers rely on superiors and on formal rules

Subordinates expect to be consulted Subordinates expect to be told what to do

Privileges and status symbols are frowned upon Privileges and status symbols are normal and popular

Manual work has the same status as office work White-collar jobs are valued more than blue-collar jobs

There are fewer supervisory personnel There are more supervisory personnel

Parents treat children as equals Parents teach children obedience

Teachers are experts who transfer impersonal truths Teachers are gurus who transfer personal wisdom

Power distance cultural differences

Small Power Distance Large Power Distance

Power distance cultural differences

Small Power Distance Large Power Distance

Exercise: The emperor’s new clothes

You are an operator with 3 years experience. For the last year, you have been part of a 5 person team of equally experienced operators at the Tweedle Dee Corporation. One day during a team meeting, the team leader asks the team to change the way zoning is done. The new way is very different from the old way. What do you do?

[2]

I, we and they: Individualism and collectivism

In individualistic cultures ties between individuals are loose, everyone is expected to look after himself or herself.

In collectivistic cultures people from birth onward are i n teg ra ted i n to s t rong , cohesive in-groups, which throughout people’s lifetimes continue to protect them in exchange for unquestioning loyalty.

Collectivist Individualist

Purpose of education is learning how to do Purpose of education is learning how to learn

Employees are members of in-groups who will pursue their in-group’s interest

Employees are “economic men” who will pursue employer’s interest if it coincides with their interest

Employer-employee relationship is basically moral, like a family link

Employer-employee relationship is a contract between parties on the labor market

Relationship prevails over task Task prevails over relationship

High-context communication prevails Low-context communication prevails

On personality tests, people score more introvert On personality tests, people score more extrovert

Harmony should be maintained and direct confrontations avoided

Speaking one’s mind is a characteristic of an honest person

Interdependent self Independent self

Occupational mobility is lower Occupational mobility is higher

ingroup outgroup

ingroup

P

outgroup

P

Perception of relationships

INDIVIDUALISTIC CULTURES

COLLECTIVISTIC CULTURES

more perceived

less perceived

intercultural distance

intercultural distance

Individual / collective cultural differences

More individualism More collectivism

Individual / collective cultural differences

More individualism More collectivism

Exercise: Who is responsible?

A new employee joins an experienced production team. The employee receives the usual training (same training that all production teams receive) and passes a proficiency exam. During her/his 1st week on the production line, s/he makes a mistake that cause several days of production to be recalled. Who is responsible?

[2]

He and she, masculine and feminine, tough and tender

A culture is masculine (tough) when emotional gender roles are clearly distinct; men are supposed to be assertive, tough, and focused on material success, whereas women are supposed to be more modest, tender, and concerned with the quality of life.

A culture is feminine (tender) when emotional gender roles overlap: both men and women are allowed to be modest, tender, and concerned with the quality of life.

Masculine Feminine

Challenge, earnings, recognition, and advancement are important Relationships and quality of life are important

Men should be assertive, ambitious, and tough Both men and women should be modest

Women are supposed to be tender and take care of relationships

Both men and women can be tender and focus on relationships

Brides need to be chaste and industrious, grooms don’t Bridegrooms and brides are held to the same standards

People live in order to work People work in order to live

Resolution of conflicts by letting the strongest win Resolution of conflicts by compromise and negotiation

There is a lower share of working women in professional jobs

There is a higher share of working women in professional jobs

Students overrate their own performance; ego-boosting Students underrate their own performance; ego-effacement

Women shop for food, men for cars Women and men shop for food and cars

EducationCo-educative schools, same content of

classes for girls and boys, same qualification for men and women.

High professional qualification is most important for men.

CareerEqual professional opportunities for men

and women are necessary.Career and professional advancement is less important for women than for men.

HomeAll housekeeping is done by both parties

to a marriage in equal shares.Housekeeping is primarily the duty of the

woman.

DecisionsNeither partner dominates; solutions do

not always follow the principle of finding a concerted decision.

In case of conflict, man has the last say, for example, in choosing the place to live,

choice of school for children.

ChildrenMan and woman share equally in raising

children.Woman is the primary care giver.

Australia • Denmark • France • Germany • India Japan • Laos • New Zealand • Norway • Singapore • USA

Exercise: Rank national cultures

Masculine / feminine cultural differences

More masculine More feminine

Masculine / feminine cultural differences

More masculine More feminine

What is different is dangerous: Uncertainty avoidance

Uncertainty avoidance is the extent to which the members of a culture feel threatened by ambiguous or unknown situations, often expressed through nervous stress (anxiety) and in a need for predictability.

Weak uncertainty avoidance Strong uncertainty avoidance

More changes of employer, shorter service Fewer changes of employer, longer service

There should be no more rules than necessary There is an emotional need for rules, even if these will not work

Hard-working only when needed There is an emotional need to be busy and an inner urge to work hard

There is tolerance for ambiguity and chaos There is need for precision and formalization

Focus on decision process Focus on decision content

Low stress and low anxiety High stress and high anxiety

What is different is curious What is different is dangerous

Top managers are concerned with strategy Top managers are concerned with daily operations

Teachers may say “I don’t know” Teachers are supposed to have all the answers

Exercise: Risk seekers / Risk averse

Australia • Brazil • China • Denmark • Finland • France • Germany Great Britain • India • Ireland • Japan • Laos • New Zealand • Norway

Pakistan • Singapore • Switzerland • Thailand • USA !

!From the list above, choose 2 cultures that are likely to foster individuals that will readily take risks and 2 cultures that are likely to foster individuals that are risk averse. Justify your choices. !

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Exercise: Risk seekers / Risk averse

The year is 2050. A company headquartered on Mars has sent you a very attractive employment offer. The offer requires a minimum commitment of 5 years on Mars. Under what conditions (if any) would you accept employment? !!!! Fact for this Exercise: More than 21,000 people have emigrated to Mars and about one hundred children have been born on Mars.

Uncertainty avoidance cultural differences

Strong uncertainty avoidance Weak uncertainty avoidance

Uncertainty avoidance cultural differences

Strong uncertainty avoidance Weak uncertainty avoidance

Yesterday, now, or later: Long- and short-term orientation

Cultures with long-term orientation foster virtues oriented toward future rewards, in particular, perseverance and thrift.

Cultures with short-term orientation foster virtues related to the past and present, in particular, respect for tradition and fulfilling social obligations.

Long-term orientation Short-term orientation

Perseverance, sustained efforts toward slow results Efforts should produce quick results

Respect for circumstances Respect for traditions

Concern with personal adaptiveness Concern with personal stability

Willingness to subordinate oneself for a purpose Concern with social and status obligations

Leisure time is not important Leisure time is important

Focus is on market position Focus is on bottom line

Main work values include learning, honesty, adaptiveness, accountability, and self-discipline

Main work values include freedom, rights, achievement, and thinking for oneself

Investment in lifelong, personal networks Personal loyalties vary with business needs

Marriage is a pragmatic arrangement Marriage is a moral arrangement

Exercise: What will you do?

!A distant, wealthy relative recently died. In his will he left you USD $10,000. There are no conditions on the inheritance except that you must invest or spend the money as follows: Invest the money in the XYZ hedge fund* or spend the money on a holiday in Hawaii. What would you do and why? !!*The hedge fund is 10 years old and has had an average historical annual return that barely exceeds inflation.

Long-term / Short-term orientation

Long-term orientation Short-term orientation

Long-term / Short-term orientation

Long-term orientation Short-term orientation

Exercise: Cultures with long-term and short-term orientations

Australia • Brazil • China • Denmark • Finland • France • Germany Great Britain • India • Ireland • Japan • Laos • New Zealand • Norway

Pakistan • Singapore • Switzerland • Turkey • USA !

!From the list above, choose 1 culture with long-term orientation and choose 1 culture with short-term orientation. Justify your choice.

Richard Lewis’s cultural categories

Linear-active cultures tend to be task-oriented, highly organized planners who complete action-chains by doing one thing at a time, preferably in accordance with a linear agenda. !Multi-active cultures are loquacious, impulsive, like to do many things at the same time, and attach great importance to feelings, relationships and people-orientation. !Reactive cultures rarely initiate action or discussion, preferring first to listen to and establish the other’s position, then react to it and formulate their own. Reactive cultures listen before they leap.

Adapted from Richard D Lewis

Cultural types model

Figure copyright Richard D Lewis

Culture category statistics

Adapted from Richard D Lewis

Linear-active 600,000,000

Multi-active 3,300,000,000

Reactive 1,700,000,000

Hybrid (multi-active and reactive) 290,000,000

Total (approx.) 6,000,000,000

Exercise: What will you do?

You must fly to a business meeting in another country. You ask your good friend to drive you to the airport. Whilst driving to the airport, your friend hits and seriously injures a pedestrian. S/he drives on without stopping. Later the police catch her/him and expect you to testify in court. What can your friend expect you to say?

Culture and emotions

• “Universal” emotions such as anger, contempt, disgust, fear, happiness, sadness, and surprise are common to all cultures.

• Individualistic cultures tend to direct attention to inner states and feelings (such as positive or negative affects).

• Collectivistic cultures tend to direct attention to outer sources (adhering to social norms or fulfilling one’s duties).

• The correlation between life satisfaction and the prevalence of positive affect is higher in individualistic cultures, whereas in collectivistic cultures affect and adhering to norms are equally important for life satisfaction.

What is this man feeling?

AngerDisgust Neutral FearJoySurprise Sadness

What is this man feeling?

Anger Disgust Neutral FearJoy Surprise Sadness

Basic communication

How do you communicate?

• Communication is at most 30% verbal!

• Remainder - 70% or more - is comprised of gestures, facial expressions, tone of voice, posture, odors, ...

• Telephone communication removes gestures, facial expressions, posture, odors, etc. Only words and tone of voice remain.

• Written communication - email, letters, etc - removes all modes of communication save for words.

Simple principles for communication

1. Be impeccable with your word

2. Don’t take anything personally

3. Don’t make assumptions

4. Always do your best

5. Be mindful

Adapted from The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz

Be impeccable with your word

• Take responsibility for your words and actions.

• Respect others and yourself.

• Be mindful of your intent.

• Consider the effect that your words will have on those who hear them.

• Do not lie to yourself or to others.

• Do not gossip.

Don’t take anything personally• To take stuff personally is

expression of selfishness: You assume that everything is about you.

• Nothing others do is because of you: It is because of the others’ programming.

• Act, don’t react: When you take stuff personally, you feel offended by others’ words and your reaction is to defend your beliefs thus creating conflict.

Act, don’t react

William Ury , co-founder of Harvard's Program on Negotiation and Senior Fellow of the Harvard Negotiation Project.

“Humans are reaction machines.”

“When you are angry, you will make the best speech you will ever regret.”

Don’t make assumptions• The human has the need to explain and understand everything. It

doesn’t matter if the explanation is correct -- the explanation by itself makes us feel safe.

• Problem with assumptions is that we believe they are the truth.

• Do not assume that your partner (business or personal) knows what you think and therefore you don’t have to say what you want.

• Do not assume that others think the way we think, feel the way we feel, and judge the way we judge.

• Stop making assumptions: Have courage to ask questions!

• Make sure communication is clear. Even then don’t assume you know everything about a situation.

• Communicate “This is what I want. That is what you want.”

Perception

Much of what you think happened or what you think you heard is based on misperception.

Perception• Mother and daughter

Perception• Mother and daughter

• Innocence Project • Eyewitness misidentification is the single greatest cause of wrongful

convictions, playing a role in more than 75% of convictions overturned through DNA testing.

• Exonerated 289 wrongfully convicted men (as of Feb 2012)

Perception• Mother and daughter

• Innocence Project • Eyewitness misidentification is the single greatest cause of wrongful

convictions, playing a role in more than 75% of convictions overturned through DNA testing.

• Exonerated 289 wrongfully convicted men (as of Feb 2012)

• Crab Nebula supernova • In 1054 a star in the region of what is now know as the Crab Nebula

exploded. For several days it was the 3rd brightest object in the sky, bright enough to be seen in daytime.

• The supernova was observed and recorded by Chinese, Japanese, and Arab astronomers and by native Americans. There are few and very obscure recorded European observations.

Exercise: Misperceptions

Think of one of your own misperceptions or a misperception that you witnessed. It may have been the result of your own personal or cultural programming or the result of your assumptions about a situation, relationship, or the circumstances.

Why (better) communication is necessary

No communication ... !

Why (better) communication is necessary

No communication ... Little communication ...

Why (better) communication is necessary

No communication ... Little communication ... Poor communication ...

Why (better) communication is necessary

No communication ... Little communication ... Poor communication ... Reduced communication ...

!

Why (better) communication is necessary

No communication ... Little communication ... Poor communication ... Reduced communication ...

... all result in more assumptions about

Always do your best

• Do no more or less than your best.

• Reasonable balance.

• Your best changes one moment to next.

• Don’t beat yourself up when you fail to do your best.

Be mindful

• Mindfulness is being in touch with and aware of the present moment, as well as taking a non-evaluative and non-judgmental approach to it.

• When the mind is not mindful and attentive, it follows its habitual patterns of liking, disliking, rejecting, pursuing, projecting, and being for and against things. Clear attentiveness is awareness that is free from the process of reacting, without adding or subtracting anything from the experience.

Be mindful

Why (better) communication is necessary

• Because effective communication results in better understanding and ...

• Better understanding of each other’s personal / business needs leads to ...

• Better personal / business relationships which in turn leads to ...

• More harmony in personal / business relationships, and ...

• Understanding is more fun than misunderstanding!

Basic communication principles

Simple Keep It Simple Stupid (KISS principle)

Repeat Say it twice in different ways

Listen Repeat what you hear

Respect Respect yourself and others

More communication principles

• When we speak to others in a language that is not our own, we often unconsciously transfer elements from our own language into the other.

• When someone speaks your language, you tend to assume that they also share your thoughts and assumptions.

• Unless you understand very well proverbs from a language that is not your own, don’t use them.

• Humor does not translate well!

• Conversational taboos usually include religion and politics as well as questions about health, age, weight, income.

• Effective verbal communication is expected to be explicit, direct, and unambiguous. Say what you mean as precisely and straightforwardly as possible.

• Some western cultures view a person who is being indirect as tricky, deceptive, and of questionable integrity. At best indirect communication is viewed as a waste of time.

• Some eastern cultures view a person who is being direct as rude and of questionable honor. At best direct communication is viewed as impolite.

Organizing information

• Open-minded people seek out (more) information before making a decision

• Close-minded people see only a narrow range of possibilities and ignore the rest

• Most cultures produce close-minded people!

Exercise: Close-minded or not?

Do you agree with the statement that most cultures produce close-minded people? Why?

Exercise: Invent a gesture

Invent a gesture that a driver can use to apologize for unintentionally cutting off another driver. The gesture must be usable in any country.

[2]

Frederick Zarndt !

Coronado CA 92118 USA

+1.801.361.3204 frederick@frederickzarndt.com

心善人品美 人美家庭和 家和国势荣 国荣天下安

Where there is light in the soul, There is beauty in the person.

Where there is beauty in the person, There is harmony in the home.

Where there is harmony in the home, There is honor in the nation.

Where there is honor in the nation, There is peace in the world.