Bulletin No 16, 2017/18

Bulletin report by Russell Bridge

President Ken Jenkyn opened the meeting at 7pm and welcomed all Members, Exchange Student Keiichiro Kita, Member’s guest Ross Paterson (Don Paterson), J Head (Ken Warne), Honorary Rotarians Rigo and Joy Tidow and District Governor Bruce Lynch and his wife Glenda.

Invocation: Ewin Stewart

Raffle winner: Ewin Stewart

President’s Report: Ken Jenkyn A meeting with NRM was held this Wednesday re Bayonet Head

infrastructure A board meeting will be held this Wednesday at 7pm. Important to discuss

the budget and ‘Friends of Rotary’ proposal Esperance Show last weekend – merry-go-round, fish van and drinks van –

fantastic effort by everyone, a big thank-you to all. Allan will give us more details as they come to hand. Thank you Allan on a fantastic effort on your part.

The Board met with DG Bruce this afternoon.

Secretary’s Report – Barry Rollond: Received leave of absence request from Jamie Hart from October 30 until the

end of harvest

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Bulletin

Rotary Club of Esperance

Meeting: Golf Club, October 23, 2017Bulletin No 16, 2017/18

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Treasurer’s Report – Brian Colliver: No Report

Club Administration – Director Rob Gurney: Rob thanked the drinks van helpers. Water was the biggest seller

Community Report – Director Allan Timmins: Allan thanked all for the effort at the Show on the weekend. Estimated profit for fish van and drinks van is $17,930 Fish van needs cleaning 8am October 24 Rotary lookout – the handrail will be going up this week

Youth Report – Director Scott Mackie: No report

Vocational Report – Director Matthew Scott: No report

International Report – Director Rob Leiper: No report

Membership Report – Director Bob Boord No report

From the Floor: Kim Beale reported that the lid for the wishing well has arrived from the east Ewin Stewart said that the gate takings from the Show were up $10,000 on

last year and general revenue was also up

Sergeant’s Session

Sergeant Chas Brodie-HallSergeant’s Assistant – Shane Meyer

The usual fines were dispensed for no badges, arrival taxes and wine winner Ewin.

Ted was fined for his 43-year anniversary as a Rotary member, well done Ted. Paul Mather fined for his four-year Rotary anniversary. Jamie Hart was fined for winning a first prize at the show for his canola and Neil McCallum was fined for winning the RFDS raffle. Michael Pederson was fined for taking over the fish van on his first outing (job well done). Graham McKenzie was also fined for his mechanical prowess on his vehicle.

Guest Speaker – DG Bruce Lynch

Bruce has been in Rotary for 24 years now and spoke on change happening in the organisation. District’s role is to support clubs with their specific needs which will drive change from Rotary International, so change will be driven from the clubs that are at the coalface of community needs.Bruce explained that Ian Riesley, president of Rotary International, says the focus is on three things:

1. Support and strengthening clubs2. Focus and increase on humanitarian service / needs to be sustainable3. Enhance public image and awareness of Rotary

Points raised under these banners were:A challenge to plant trees, one for every member in Rotary worldwideMembership is 23% female world-wide and RI would like to see this riseFebruary 23 will be “wear club shirt day“ to promote Rotary in the communityRotary.com website to promote ourselvesRotary Foundation, together with Bill Gates, has committed to end polio in the world with Bill to donate two dollars for every one dollar raised by Rotary to help end polio. A commitment by Rotary to raise $150,000 for the next three years will thus turn into $1.35 million.Bruce also promoted District Conference to be held in Margaret River March 16/18 next year.

Attendance Report – Paul Mather:

Members – 42 Present – 25 Honorary Members – 2 Leave of Absence – 8 Apologies – 9 Silent – 0 Members’ guests – 2 Visiting Rotarians 0 Exchange student (Keiichiro) 1 Percentage – 86.2

Next meeting’s program – Ewin Stewart:

Rotary Shed, October 30, 2017

Guest Speaker:

Invocation: Don Paterson Sergeant Assist: John Grigson Student Host: Matthew Scott Welcome Host Guest Speaker Intro: Guest Speaker Thanks: Standby: Rob Lieper

President Ken thanked Members, Exchange Student Keiichiro Kita, Member’s guests and DG Bruce Lynch and wife Glenda, closing the meeting with the National Anthem.

Calendar reminders

October 30 Shed meetingNovember 17: Chamber of Commerce, Rotary Business After Hours

Please note: if you have not received your Bulletin by Friday of the week of the meeting please inform Paul Goldie at paul.goldie1@bigpond.com

The Club has a dedicated phone for apologies either by verbal message or SMS text.Please notify by 10am on the day of the meeting. The phone number is 0419 924 686.

Club Website details: www.esperancerotary.org.auLog-in and password: as per Rotary email 17/4/14

Ken Jenkyn is available to assist any members who are having difficulty in accessing the Rotary website. He can also assist with recovering forgotten passwords and log-in details. Contact him at ken@perdita.com.au or 0411 119 003.

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… just for a laugh

DelusionYou are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed.

On your right side is a sharp drop off, and on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you. Directly in front of you is another galloping horse but your horse is unable to overtake it.

Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the horse in front of you. What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?

Get your drunken self off the merry-go-round!

Monkey on his backA boy with a monkey on his shoulder was walking down the road when he passed a policeman who said, "Now, now young lad, I think you had better take that monkey to the zoo."

The next day, the boy was walking down the road with the monkey on his shoulder again, when he passed the same policeman.

The policeman said, "Hey there, I thought I told you to take that money to the zoo!"

The boy answered, "I did! Today I'm taking him to the cinema."

Don’t askQ: Why do the French eat snails?

A: They don't like fast food.

Religious differencesA priest, a minister, and a rabbi wanted to see who was the best at his job.

So they each go into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. Later they get together.

The priest begins: “When I found the bear, I read to him from the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy water. Next week is his first communion.”

“I found a bear by the stream,” says the minister, “and preached God’s holy word. The bear was so mesmerized that he let me baptize him.”

They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying on a stretcher in a body cast.

“Looking back,” he says, “maybe I shouldn't have started with the circumcision.”

Cunning as a poodleA wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her poodle along for company.

One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, discovers that he's lost.

Wandering about, he notices a hungry-looking leopard heading rapidly in his direction. The poodle thinks, "Uh, oh!"

Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat.

Just as the leopard is about to leap, the poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?"

Hearing this, the leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees.

"Whew!" says the leopard. "That was close! That poodle nearly had me!"

Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard.

So off he goes, but the poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard.

The leopard is furious at being made to look a fool and says, "Here, monkey, hop on my back so you can watch me chew that poodle to bits!"

Now, the poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?"

But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet, and waits until they get just close enough to hear.

"Where's that damn monkey?" the poodle says.

"I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!"