three types of behaviour non-assertive aggressive assertive
TRANSCRIPT
Three types of Behaviour
Non-assertive
Aggressive
Assertive
Non-Assertive Behaviour
Behaviour that involves:
failing to stand up for your rights or doing so in such a way that people can disregard them
expressing your needs, wants, opinions, feeling or beliefs in apologetic, diffident of self-effacing ways
failing to express honestly your needs, wants, opinions, feelings or beliefs.
Aggressive Behaviour
Behaviour that involves:
Standing up for your own rights, but doing so in such a way that you violate the rights of others
Ignoring or dismissing the needs, wants, opinions, feelings or beliefs of others
Expressing your own needs, wants etc. inappropriately
Assertive Behaviour
Behaviour that involves:
Standing up for your own rights without violating the rights of others.
Expressing your needs, wants, opinions, feelings and beliefs in a direct, honest and appropriate way.
The Effects of Non-Assertive Behaviour on You
A growing loss of Self Esteem
Increase in Anger, Hurt, Self Pity
More Internal Tensions(e.g. nervous energy)
and/or
increasing inability more healthto act assertively problems
The Effects of Non-Assertive Behaviour on Others
Others feel sorry for you
They feel guilty/indifferent (about taking advantage)
They feel irritation
They cease to respect you
They restrict their contact with you
The Effects of Aggression on You
Aggression
Guilt or shame Blaming others
Constant state of alert
Apologising profusely or Drained of energybeing over helpful
Hate and mistrust against large groups of people
Isolation
The Effects of Aggression on Others
Others may admire you or They may feel anger, hurt or humiliation.
They retaliate or go underground.
They take fewer risks
They become resigned
or they leave
The Effects of Assertion
You have made clear what your needs, feelings, opinions are.
The other person is clear where you stand.
You can be clear where the other person stands.
Problems can be resolved and decisions made openly
Assertive Communication
Decide what you want to say
Say it clearly
Support what you say by the way that you say it
Do not get side-tracked
Listen
Aim for “Win Win”
In Order to Buy Time We must Realise that:
We do not have to respond immediately and positively to request demands or criticism.
And We can refuse to be rushed into a quick or automatic response to someone else’s apparent crisis or emergency.