The Pyramid of Well-Being:

a framework for happiness and Success

By Sam Spurlin

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The Pyramid of Well-Being: A Framework for Happiness and Success www.samspurlin.com

about the author

My passion is helping people close the gap between who they envision themselves being and who they actually are. Most of us are striving for a better and more complete version of ourselves. I believe that by looking at the positive aspects of what it means to be a human being and systematically trying to improve those components I can help you reach previously insurmountable heights. I study the science of positive psychology because it uses the exact same approach to the study of the human mind, behaviors, and capabilities.

From October 2009 to June 2011 I developed and ran a popular simple living and minimalism blog, The Simpler Life. It was my vehicle for sharing my experiences with living and developing a more conscious lifestyle. At the same time, I was leading the University of Detroit Mercy hockey team as head coach. Lastly, I was in the classroom teaching high school economics and government. Through these three avenues I realized helping people improve their lives is my true passion. With this new-found clarity I applied and was admitted to study Positive Developmental Psychology at Claremont Graduate University. In June 2009 I decided The Simpler Life was too narrowly focused to achieve my mission of positive personal development so I started a new website and business, SamSpurlin.com. With my coaching and writing I explore what it means to live a conscious life focused on personal development and growth.

I’ve self-published two other e-books to positive acclaim, Living the Simpler Life: 8 Essentials to Practice Everyday and Regaining Consciousness. You can download Living the Simpler Life for free here. More information about Regaining Consciousness can be found here.

I thank you for taking the time to investigate my writing and I hope you’ll be willing to contact me with any questions or feedback at any time.

Thank you and good luck!

Sam Spurlinsamspurlin@gmail.comSkype: samspurlin@samspurlin

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The Pyramid of Well-Being: A Framework for Happiness and Success www.samspurlin.com

introduction

There’s a scourge ravaging the countryside, the city streets, and the picket-fenced yards of suburbia. It’s sapping our energy, excitement, happiness, joy, and zest for life. It’s leaving unfulfilled dreams, failed goals, and shattered aspirations in its wake. If it were a medical disease, there would be a worldwide alert and legions of scientists desperately searching for a cure. People would be lining up to buy the latest medicine and taking extreme caution to prevent catching this pervasive contagion. You don’t want to catch this affliction — and yet, most people already have.

The disease is unconscious living.

Unconscious living is the result of going through the motions of daily life. Zombie-like, we react to external stimuli instead of our own internal values. The loudest, closest, and most urgent information is what prompts our reaction. This leaves us at the mercy of advertisers who know the quickest avenue to our wallets is through our attention. It results in politicians exaggerating and magnifying our fears in a bid for unquestioning support. It means filling our bodies with cheap, unhealthy and unsustainable food because it’s readily available, it’s what everyone else is eating, and we’ve never thought about a better option.

The symptoms of unconscious living read like the fine print at the end of a medicine commercial: “May cause apathy, depression, unease, unfulfilled dreams, listlessness, disinterest, boredom, hostility, squandering of natural abilities and extreme laziness.”

Even more worrying, this disease affects not only individuals, but society as a whole.

A society built of individuals who mindlessly wander through life is like a building set upon sand. Individuals make up the base of society, and when individuals are weakened by unconsciousness, the entire structure is likely to collapse. Look around you, read a newspaper, or flip on CNN to see this disintegration happening in real time.

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The Pyramid of Well-Being: A Framework for Happiness and Success www.samspurlin.com

Our society, on a national and global level, is being decimated by a multitude of ills. Environmental destruction, obesity and starvation, political apathy, pervasive poverty, violence on both a local and genocidal scale, educational mediocrity, lack of innovation, crime, drug use and a myriad of other problems are tearing at the seams of our world. The causes of each are varied and nuanced, but they all speak to a larger theme.

The problems of society cannot be blamed on anything but our own shortcomings as human beings.

Luckily, therein also lies the solution. Though we as individuals are the separate and flawed pieces of society, we also hold the answer. With personal development and improved consciousness we can drive societal development and improvement. Shaking off the scourge of unconsciousness and cultivating the skills and mindfulness needed to reclaim our autonomy as human beings will improve the world.

Societal improvement is irrevocably and irreparably tied to personal improvement. All positive change, like all negative change, is tied to individuals. Individuals make up the larger institutions, the governments, and the companies that impact the world. It’s only by improving ourselves that the problems of the world are addressed.

The problem, however, is that most of us are fast asleep.

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The Pyramid of Well-Being: A Framework for Happiness and Success www.samspurlin.com

Waking Up

Living consciously, or waking up from our malaise of disinterest, aimless living, and apathy, is the answer to problems both small and large. On the individual level, gaining control of our consciousness opens a number of doors toward improving our lives. Where lives were characterized by boredom and apathy, conscious living is marked by excitement, motivation, and profound interest in the world around us. Being an unconscious zombie means ignoring our values, goals, and dreams. On the other hand, waking up our consciousness aligns our values with our actions. It makes our goals more than just abstract yearnings but actual projects that can be worked on and completed. It makes our dreams more than just ephemeral thoughts but tangible and attainable realities.

Living consciously can be described by one word: control. A conscious life is a life of individual control. Control over our thoughts and emotions. Control over our actions and our words. Control over how we live our lives, treat our bodies, and interact with people around us. At first glance, this may seem unnecessarily rigid or disciplined. I’m not describing the type of control a drill sergeant has over a recruit. I’m talking about liberating ourselves as much as possible from forces that strive to make decisions for us, or what I call external decision makers. Indeed, what more is there to life than living according to your values? A life outside

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The Pyramid of Well-Being: A Framework for Happiness and Success www.samspurlin.com

your control is no different from a zombie stumbling around in the endless search for brains. The symbol of the zombie is our antithesis.

We can become more than that.

We must become more than that.

A Framework For Better living

For the past couple of years I’ve been taking steps to live my life more consciously. What started as an effort to get rid of the detritus in my overcrowded dorm room has turned into a voyage that has seen me change my career path, start a popular blog, become a runner, begin meditating, and generally live a happier life. Thinking about my own experiences over the past couple years, I’ve also been observing the people around me that have been making similar changes. Blogging has given me a front seat to the “minimalism” and “lifestyle design” movement that’s currently popular. I now realize that there is an almost natural process toward more conscious living.

The Pyramid of Well-Being is a framework I developed that describes the natural process I have observed in my own life and others. It leads people to a more conscious and deliberate life. I don’t think it’s the only way to reach this end, but from what I’ve observed in my own life and through my experience as a personal development coach, I think it’s a natural progression that happens on its own. By articulating the various levels of the pyramid I can help you progress through them more efficiently and effectively than if left to your own devices. For example, you could teach yourself tennis and improve your skills over time, but having a coach who knows the game and can break it down into manageable chunks will inevitably help you. This framework is your coach leading you toward a conscious life.

The Basics

The pyramid consists of four levels that build upon each other. You cannot successfully and smoothly move to the next level until you have spent some time at the lower levels. Each level sets a strong foundation

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The Pyramid of Well-Being: A Framework for Happiness and Success www.samspurlin.com

for the rest of the pyramid. The following chapters will explain these levels, give you resources to help you, and advice for overcoming the most common pitfalls.The four levels of the Pyramid of Well-Being are:

1. Clarifying and Articulating Values

2. Physical and Mental Decluttering

3. Regulating Time and Attention 4. Cultivating Consciousness

It’s certainly possible to wwork on physically decluttering your living space before articulating your values, but you’ll find it to be a much more rewarding experience if you’ve taken the time to think about what truly matters to you (articulating values) first. In the same way, it’s difficult to make decisions about where you’re willing to spend your most preciously finite resources, your time and attention, before you’ve decluttered and cleared your mind.

Despite the pyramidal shape of this model, it’ not a direct journey to the top. It’s easy to assume that once you’ve reached the top of the pyramid the journey is over and you have officially “made it” as a conscious person. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, the whole process is much more cyclical than my simple pyramid metaphor. You may work yourself up to the third level of the pyramid only to discover that some of the values you originally articulated at the first level are no longer valid. You may feel compelled to step back and revisit that level before moving on. In fact, reaching the top of the pyramid means nothing more than the fact that you’re probably conscious enough to step back to the previous levels and make adjustments where needed. Even the

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The Pyramid of Well-Being: A Framework for Happiness and Success www.samspurlin.com

most stately of buildings has maintenance workers that keep it in top shape. Likewise, you will constantly be on the lookout to patch cracks, strengthen foundations, and make improvements to the pyramid of your life. Indeed, you’re the stewards of your own life.