The Journal of Emergency Medicme, Vol 9, p 523, 1991 Printed in the USA. Copynght 0 1991 Pergamon Press plc

THE MOON IN THE MAN

There’s a moon in that man And he can’t be cured of anything Until it’s out. He came into the ER High on light At least in lunar orbit, Crying that he’d swallowed the moon I’m only an intem- I looked out the windows to check his story. It was a cloudy night, hard to be sure of anything. Doctor, my patient has swallowed A moon. Not the moon, the attending gasped. And looked out at the clouds. I can’t be sure, I wavered, But it’s in the differential. Did your patient lose consciousness at any time? Hit his head? Vomit blood? Family history of seizures? Medications? Allergies? Previous conditions? I kept it short. He just swallowed the moon.

Well, get a chest x-ray, young doctor! I already did, but the moon is radiolucent, sir. It could have embolized and lodged in his PA, He’s having problems breathing. Should we V.Q. scan the moon? Good heavens, no! The attending yelled. What heresy! Where’s your well-rounded training? Call a psychiatry consult, young doctor. Tell them to bring their moon-removal equipment. My eyes grew wide (as moons). Moon removal equipment! Lunar extraction devices! Psych. came and sized up the moon-eating man, Whom they called loony-I told them so. They put him higher with a little thorazine. Then, as if by magic, They led the moon right out of the ER On a leash. The moon is over at Mental Health right now, And I can’t quite figure out What that bright, round silver smile Joking in the night sky Is trying so hard to tell me.

SheriAnn Hunt, MD

Internal Medicine Milwaukee County Regional Medical Complex

8700 West Wisconsin Avenue Milwaukee. Wisconsin 53226

Humanities and Medicine provides a venue for essays, poems, and other expressions of the medical humanities. = Readers are encouraged to submit articles. This section is coordinated by Richard M. Rutzan, MD, University of Con- B necticut School of Medicine, Faxmington, Connecticut. RECEIVED: 15 March 1991; ACCEPTED: 24 April 1991 0736-4679/91 $3.00 + .OO

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