Contents:

South Park: The Stick of Truth

Game Review

Goat Simulator Mini Review

Magic 2014 Tips #5

Frozen Movie Review

Community Pic of the Month

Announced PC Game Releases

(May - June)

News:

New Photo Albums - The new photo

albums on the webpage allow players

in the community to not only find

pictures much faster and hopefully

spur more people to share their

gaming adventures with us.

Facebook Comment box - A new

Comment box can be found on the

Community homepage under the tab

"More" allowing you to share your

thoughts with both the gamers on the

page as well as the ones that follow us

on Facebook.

Tazer Sponsors - A new face turned

up one day at the office looking lost

and hungry, so we adopted the

youngster and set him to work.

CorkyHD is a new Youtuber and we

liked his videos. So help us to

welcome Corky to the Tazer family by

having a gander at his channel and

hopefully like his page. Let us know if

he gets out of line, we have a ruler on

standby.... (To measure his errors of

course).

.... Because reasons - As a little note

on the side. One of the Gazette's

writers will be indisposed of for a

couple months to come, as such the

series Magic 2014 Tips might be left

out or under new management for

the coming month. But we will work

to fill in the spot and with any luck we

(we say "we" but what we really mean

is "he") will be able to perform as

normal, be that good or bad.

South Park: The Stick of Truth

By Nathan Scullard

Hello fellow gamers, and welcome to another

Tazer PC Gaming Review. This month I will be

covering South Park: The Stick of Truth, and

the first thing I need to say, is that I have not

yet finished this game, and that is due to the

fact that my Gaming PC has been out of action

now for about 4 weeks, and so far is not

looking like returning anytime soon, which for

many different reasons is infuriating! I am

missing out on so much Titanfall right now

you would not believe how much I miss that

game, but to be totally honest there is a game

I am missing MORE the Titanfall, and that of

course is...Plants Vs. Zombies! Nah, only

kidding! It’s South Park: The Stick of Truth.

I have always been a fan of South Park and

even though I haven’t watched much of it in

recent years, it has always been something

that I enjoyed watching. So when I heard

about the game being released, it

immediately tweaked my interest, and I’m

sure some of you may have noticed that it

was one of our “Tazer Top Picks” Trailers for

months.

Now the game has been out a little while and

many many people have had a chance to

review it and express their opinions on it I

would just like to take a second to say...”I

bloody told you so!” LOL. I knew the game

was going to be good from the off, and not

just because I liked South Park. A lot of people

were pre-judging the game based on its

previous instalments. I’m of course talking

about the likes of South Park (1998), South

Park: Chef’s Luv Shack (1999) and South Park

Rally (2000), we will ignore the more recent

arcade attempts at a game that were both

abysmal, but them aside, all three of the other

games had the same huge flaw... they were

terrible!

The original game tried to create the beloved

characters in a 3D interpretation of the show,

which mainly consisted of throwing snowballs

at evil rampaging turkeys, a pretty shallow

storyline to be fair and a terribly cheap tie-in

game that was meant to make money rather

than entertain its owners. Chef’s Luv Shack, in

my opinion was a brilliant game, or at least it

could have been had it not been for the really

irritating Americanised game show style mini

games that made up the bulk of the game. But

at the same time it was the first time they had

been true to the show, not afraid to not tone

it down for a the audience. And then they

released South Park Rally, in which they

totally threw out everything I just said and

decided to go back to the child-friendly 3D

model <SIGH>.

So I will admit that their gaming history has

not been great, but when I started hearing

things about the Stick of Truth (SOT), it still

tweaked my interest. And the more I found

out about it the more excited I began to

become, so when I finally bought it, it was

make or break time. It was either going to be

amazing or a total flop, and I am happy to

announce that it was f**king awesome!

The game follows a wonderful style of play in

which it feels like an immersive interactive

South Park episode, and is almost broken

down into the style with sleep dictating the

start and end of certain chapters of the story.

The story itself is, to start, all about two

factions fighting “Dungeons and Dragons

Style” over ‘The Stick of Truth’. But with so

many side plots and missions the story soon

digresses into a hilarious culmination of crazy

stuff. Including; Aliens and Anal Probing, Nazi

Zombies and Underpants Stealing Gnomes

(Hilarious Scene! Those of you who have

played the game will know what I mean...).

There is a lot more besides that but those are

the three main ones I have come across so far,

as I have already mentioned I have not yet

been able to complete it.

The game itself only suffers from one or two

minor problems as far as I can see. The first is

the occasional glitches in the videos. Several

times my character has disappeared in the

video clips, either that or he just flickers,

which is a real shame because it does tend to

distracted you from the otherwise funny and

interesting plot. I have heard of worse glitches

than this in the game though. NerdCubed for

example, could not play his game to begin

with as one of the scenes in the early tutorials

just froze and refused to go any further.

Apart from the occasional glitch in the game

the only other issue I have is with the ‘Turn-

Based’ (TB) combat system they decided on

for the game. I really hate TB systems anyway,

I think they are slow and dull, and if you get

stuck on one you can’t get past then it can be

really frustrating too. However, having said

that, the story begins with them in a

‘Dungeons and Dragons’ style game so TB

gameplay actually fits quite well with the

genre. And it was certainly more interesting

than Final Fantasy’s latest

instalment...seriously what the hell have they

done to that game?!

I really am looking forward to finishing this

game when I get my main PC back up and

running and definitely will be going around

getting all the collectibles that are littered

throughout the map, which to be honest isn’t

huge but still benefits from a good fast travel

system, which would otherwise have caused

me to have some real issues with the game

due to a lot of the back and forth missions

that mean you have to visit several of the map

locations on multiple occasions, a trait that

would have become very annoying very

quickly if it wasn’t for the fast travel system.

A lot of people slate South Park for its bad

animation and outdated jokes. But I

personally think that South Park is best when

taken at face value. It’s a silly, rude and

shallow show on purpose, as is the animation

style, and I am pleased to say that the game

takes all of that across with it and nothing is

lost in translation.

So what are you waiting for, give it the benefit

of the doubt and let yourself be pleasantly

surprised by this amazing game.

Thank for taking the time to read my review.

If you liked this then don’t forget to check out

my new Minecraft Series on our YouTube

channel where YOU, yes YOU...can help me

choose what to build.

See you next month gamers! Byeeeeeee!

Goat Simulator (Mini Review)

Reece Corkhill (CorkyHD)

What is Goat Simulator?

Goat simulator is basically what it says in the

title, a goat simulator. It is a very good but

also very strange game to play. It consists of a

wide selection of playable goats and just to

top it all off, you can also play as an Ostrich

and a Giraffe. Weird right?

Then you just do what you want. You can

head-butt and lick things till your heart’s

content. And I’m not joking. The aim isn’t to

complete the game, it is to have fun whilst

playing the little side challenge, which are so

fun as they are really crazy stuff.

I have already played hours and hours of goat

simulator, probably way too much and still

haven’t completed all of the side challenges

yet as I have been having far too much fun

without needing to do them much. They are

optional after all so you don’t HAVE to do

them, only if you choose to.

So I would suggest if you get this game, have

fun and at least try some of the challenges,

like I said they are NUTS!

And as the game goes on, the aims get better

and better as you have to be as destructive as

you can in any way you like, and DO mean

ANY!

Since this is my first review, I don’t really

know what to write but I would love to play

through some of the goat simulator future

patches, as there are rumours of some sort of

multiplayer. So keep an eye out for them on

my channel and of course on the Tazer

Channel too.

If I could give this game a rating out of 10, I

would give it a 6 because although the game

is really fun, the game has no actual aim to it

which I personally believe it does need in

order to give the game some sort of direction.

As far as the visuals go, the graphics aren’t

amazing but the gameplay really compensates

for that and it seems to me that that is really

what this game is all about...the fun...and

licking things.

So I rate this game 6/10!

Thank you for taking the time read my first

review, and if you like this kind of stuff don’t

forget to Like, Follow and Subscribe to mine

and all the Tazer stuff for more great content.

Hello summoners and welcome back to this

month’s Magic tips. This month's tips might

be a bit shorter considering the nature of the

deck. And I'm going away a bit from the

normal decks you get in the game and I

wanted to talk to you about the Masks of the

Dimir. This was originally an extra deck that

came out on launch. The deck is strong if used

right but it lacks a lot of strong creatures in

my opinion. I think the strongest one in it is a

7/7 golem creature but I'm not going to talk

about that. I built this deck in order to mess

with my human opponents and not to be the

best deck against the A.I. So let me get started

then and I hope you like this deck, just a short

heads up, all these cards are those I have in

the deck myself. So they are not the strongest

cards but it’s the build I'm using, and so far,

against human opponents, it’s fun. Not the

strongest, but fun it is.

First off I wanted the

Dimir Guildmage in the

deck, not only because

it’s the name of the

deck but also for its

ability. It’s a weak 2/2,

but looking at the

ability it's worth it.

Paying four mana will

activate its ability, using a black card will allow

you to force one enemy to discard a card, but

playing with a blue mana will make you draw

a card. Or for that matter, ANYONE you like to

draw a card.

It’s a good ability that

ties in with the other

cards I use in the deck.

Last Grasp is just a basic

instant card that I use to

debuff those stronger

creatures that I can't

deal with right off the

bat. Giving a strong

creature a nice -3/-3 is always a good idea if

it's going to be in your face a lot. Not the most

amazing card but it has its uses, especially so

in this deck with very few high strength

creatures in it.

Next card in the deck is

Treasure Hunter. It’s a

card draw that can

potentially draw you a

lot or just nothing at all.

It works by revealing

cards from your library

till you run across a

basic land card. All cards

revealed in this way are then moved to your

hand. So it could give you a lot, usually it

averages two to four cards in my deck, but

there are times when it gives me only one or

zero. Still it goes with the deck theme.

The card Mind Rot is a

doom for many players

as it will force them to

throw away two cards

every time I use the

spell. And I think there

are four cards in the

deck as I have it. And it’s

hilarious every time I

have my opponents throw away their winning

cards.

Mark of the Vampire is

one of the few Aura

cards in the deck, it

bestows a nice +2/+2

and lifelink to the

creature it’s attached

to. With no other way

of getting life back in a

pinch I felt that I wanted it in the deck just to

have an opportunity to use it. And again with

the lack of many high strength creatures

having something that can give them power is

something I like to have.

Dire Undercurrents ties

in to the main theme

about the deck, drawing

cards or making the

enemy throw them

away. It's an

Enchantment that

allows me to draw a

card for every blue

creature that enter the game under my

control I can make the target player draw a

card, and for every black creature I can have

them discard a card. Very funny and very

useful.

Fools Demise is another

Aura card that adds to

the creature’s

survivability. Should

enchanted creature die

it will be returned to

the battlefield under

your control. The Aura

itself will be returned to

your hand, creating the possibility to use it

over and over again. And with few big

creatures it's important to keep the ones you

have alive.

Another Aura card

although not as

powerful is Illusionary

armour, it gives a

creature +4/+4 for a big

powerhouse but since

it's an illusion it will give

it the special rule that

we talked about last

month. If it becomes the target by a spell or

an ability it will be destroyed. So it usually

doesn’t last too long unfortunately. Still I need

the power in the deck.

Shadow Slice, I like these

cards, it causes 3 damage to

my opponent and I can put it

on a creature card thanks to

its Cipher rule. Meaning that

every time the creature

attacks I can cast the spell

for free every time as long as

the creature is alive. And

while I'm on the subject

Mental Vapors has the same

Cipher rule but in this one it

will make my opponent discard yet another

card. They are two cards in basically the same

league and with that Cipher rule you can cast

them over and over again free of charge.

Now we get to talk

creatures again,

Necropolis Regent is

one of the few good

creatures in the deck.

Not only is it kind of

powerful in its own

right it also has a special

ability. Every time a

creature does damage to an enemy, it will get

that many counters on it. So if it does two

damage to a player it will get two +1/+1

counters, making them stronger every time

they get to do damage. It’s a good card but

will in many ways be the target of a lot of

spells as your opponent won't let you keep it

alive for very long.

Mindleech Mass is one

other creature that will

become the target of

many enemy spells. Not

only can it do damage

but if it does it will allow

you to cast a non land

card from their hand for

no cost. Allowing you

access to their spells and abilities, which is

kind of nifty if you ask me.

The last card of this

month's deck is Avatar

of Will. It's just a 5/6

with flying for the cost of

six colourless mana and

two blue. However, by

now you should have

been able to whittle

down some of your

opponents cards, and if you have they might

not have any cards at all. If so this card will get

more affordable with a whole six in mana

cost, taking it down to just two blue mana for

a 5/6 creature with flying, not so bad.

Just remember to keep your creatures alive,

there are more in the deck but they are far

from the most powerful, and they might need

a bit of back up in order to survive for long.

That’s all for this month's deck, and as always

I hope to see you out there.

Happy Gaming people.

Frozen (Movie Review)

By Nathan Scullard

My daughter pestered me for months to

watch this film, and finally a couple of weeks

ago when the dvd came out, I gave in and

bought it for them and was subsequently

forced to watch it over and over and over,

until all I wanted to do was rip my eyeballs

out and eat them. A feeling I beleive I share

with many parents on Facebook regarding this

movie.

Its not that it’s a bad movie, it’s just how

much your kids go on and on about it. I’ve

never known another movie that spurred such

an irritating reaction from children.

The story is about two sisters, Elsa and Anna

(or Arna as they pronounce it in the movie)

who as young children were very close. Elsa

has a special gift where she can create and

manipulate snow and ice with a touch of her

hand. But one day while the girls are playing

together Elsa accidently harms Anna with her

power and her parents have to rush Anna to a

special shamen who can heal her, but the

shamen explains that for Anna’s sake she

must have her memory erased of all

knowledge of Elsa’s ability so that the same

thing does not happen again.

This also forces Elsa to grow up and live a life

of solitude, always shying away from human

contact and interaction. A trait which

confuses and upsets Anna, who cannot

understand why Elsa acts this way.

But one fateful night their parents are lost at

sea, and the two sisters have to once again

reconnect for the sake of the kingdom left to

them by their late parents. But as expected,

not all goes to plan, and when Anna meets an

interesting and attractive man she

immediately falls head over heels in love and

announces to Elsa that she is going to marry

him after only knowing him for a single day.

Understandbly, Elsa loses her cool, but this

causes her to lose control of her ability, and

she accidently brings on an endless winter and

flees the kingdom.

The film does have a really great interesting

story, and as with all disney movies the

characters are memorable and engaging. In

fact no matter how much I really want to slate

this movie for being so goddamn irratating, it

is on the whole a very good film.

And I have to say I absolutely loved Olaf, the

little snowman character and even after

watching this film for the third time, he was

the one part of it that didn’t get old or boring.

I did however get a little tired of the rest of

the movie, but I am not going to base my

opinion of the film on how many times I had

to watch it before I got bored, as many films

would have bored me after watching them

three times.

Although it probably won’t be held in the

same esteem as the likes of Beauty and the

Beast, Toy Story or Aladdin, it is still a very

good disney film and does what every good

disney film should do... it inspires droves of

children to dare to dream.

So, that being said I really can’t give it a bad

review just because I myself don’t feel the

same way about it as my daughter does, but

thats because your not supposed to. I want

each and every one of you to think back to a

Disney film you saw as a child, I don’t need to

tell you which one to think about, because the

first one that pops into your head will be the

one you loved as a child and felt the most

attached to. For me it was Aladdin.

Well that is what this film is all about, as is

almost every Disney movie on the market.

They are about creating memories for kids

and for that, I give Frozen a 10/10, as a movie

it would probably be a 7.5/10. So just

remember that next time your son or

daughter goes on and on about Frozen or

another film they absolutely love. You were

that child once.

“Killing People is Bad! Go and Stand in the corner and think about what you have done!”

Thanks to SaintsTerror for this issues Pic of the Month!

If you would like YOUR screenshot featured in the Community Pic of the Month, then

please go to the Community Homepage on the website and Submit your pictures via the

upload function at the bottom of the page.

Even though we can't feature all the picture on the Community Pic of the Month we will

show all of them on the website's Community Photo Album.

Outlast: Whistleblower PC

Action , Adventure Red Barrels

May 6, 2014

Tesla Effect: A Tex Murphy

Adventure PC

Adventure Atlus

May 7, 2014

Killer is Dead PC

Action Deep Silver

May 9, 2014

The Last Tinker: City of Colors PC

Action Mimimi Productions

May 12, 2014

Wolfenstein: The New Order PC

Shooter Bethesda Softworks

May 23, 2014

Transistor PC

Action , RPG Supergiant Games

May 20, 2014

Tropico 5 PC

Strategy Kalypso Media

May 23, 2014

Watch Dogs PC

Action Ubisoft

May 27, 2014

Monster Madness Online PC

Shooter Trendy Entertainment

May 2014

Kill the Bad Guy PC

Puzzle Exkee

May 2014

1849 PC

Simulation SomaSim

May 2014

MouseCraft PC

Puzzle Crunching Koalas

May 2014

Dynasty Warriors 8 Xtreme Legends --

Complete Edition PC

Action Tecmo KOEI

May 2014

Kick-Ass 2 PC

Action UIG Entertainment

May 2014