thank you for your rejection letter
TRANSCRIPT
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an absolutely no-bullshit guide to
handling literary rejection,or any kind of rejection really,by
THANK YOU
FOR YOUR
REJECTION
LETTER
AUDREY EL-OSTA
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Dear Mr. Editor, (or Ms. but lets be honest, its usually Mr.)
Thank you for your rejection letter. I
regret to inform you that I will not be
accepting your totally sincereform letter, and
will definitely take this to heart for a day or
two. I will mope and have a cry, and I will
wring my hands to high heaven wishing I
were good enough for you.
Im sorry to say that I will be in
absolute fear of submitting again, as you
encourage me (and no doubt hundreds of
others) to do before you sign off, with your
fancy acronyms. BA. BLitt. EIC. MFA. WANK.
Im just not a good fit for your magazine.
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1. shock: you skim, the eyes find
we regret to inform you, andsenses shut down, the fingers
go numb.
2. self doubt: why am I even
writing? Am I even any good?How much effort, how many
more hours of labouring over
imperfect drafts until I realise
this is futile?
3. depression: what is the fuckingpoint of it?
4. anger: what the fuck do they
know? Im a genius, a great
mind, like Plath or Adrian
Mole.
5. (begrudging) acceptance: sighs
and redrafts.
note: stages may cycle, skip and/orrepeat depending on the stage of
our career.
THE 5 STAGES OF GRIEF
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After a day or two of crying and
wailing and acting like a miserable
sook, Im sorry to say Im gonna start
to hate you. Im gonna hate you and
everything your rag of a literary
magazine because anything with a
domain name and a duotrope listing is
automatically a respectable journal of
arts and culture stands for.
I will hate you for as long as I
need to, as long as that may be.
Maybe until those pieces are accepted
somewhere else, or a completely
different acceptance comes along.
Maybe that is all it takes to chisel you
free from my icy grudge list.
Maybe until you yield to my genius
after an appropriate number of
redrafts. Or ma be forever.
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Have this system in place, in advance. emails are instant.
1. Have a champion. Find them, and talk to them. Achampion is a person who believes in you, your art and yourwork completely. Talk to them and let them remind you of
how wonderful you are.2. Have tea and coffee stores fully stocked. Calming chamomilefor anger and rage, mint and green for shock and despair,and English Breakfast for redrafts
3. Drink lots of water, and stay hydrated. Even if you dontcry all that much, or at all. Drink water!
4. Visit a petting zoo, or failing that, the cutest animal owned
by someone who isnt you. The physical touch, comfort,intimacy and acceptance afforded by a non-human cutie helpsa lot.
5. Treat your self! You work hard, soon you will workharder. Enjoy your break.
SELF CARE
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You can potentially combine steps 1
+ 5, with telepathy and love.
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why hold on to this hatred? why
hold on to a feeling that doesnt
serve me? why hold on to you?
because I gave you something I
poured myself into. I gave you a partof me, my body, my life, that I
worked on for hours and days and
you looked at it for 15 minutes andyou said
naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
the way when someone
declines chinese food whentheyre craving pizza
the way when someone declines a
drink with someone they hate at the
office but dont have the guts to bemean to
the way when someone tries
to be polite but doesnt tryhard enough, & dont care.
the way you get to say no, when itsnot your heart getting told no.
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At least you werent vague, and offer me the
honour of your so very CONSTRUCTIVE
CRITICISM, limited to three words total:
This. Needs. Work.
Yeah, I got that from you not wanting it,
wanna be a bit more specific>? Is it my
voice, my word choice, my structure and
style? Is it my age, and limited life
experience, my bio photo or my more-ethnic-than-yours name? Is it my content,
my subject, my feminist leanings? Is it
something I can fix with practice, or
something I should scrap?
I dont care for it.Thats fantastic, how can I make you care
for it? More characterisation, less
sympathy and pity?
Please read the journal.
I assume you mean again? Because I have,
Ive read and re-read, what more do you
want me to do?
And finally, a speck of specificity:
More prosody.I STUDY LINGUISTICS YOU PIECE OF FUCK,
IVE GOT PLENTY OF PROSODY.
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1. You are not your work. You are a person, andyou are always worthy.2. Your work is wonderful, and will be wonderful.
You are young, in age and in your art. Letyourself grow, and accept when you are remindedof that.
3. A rejection is an opportunity for growth.4. You are not limited by the extent of your success,
you have not peaked.
5. Accept all this, as difficult as it may seem, andaccept yourself as an artist, as a poet, as a writer,and as a human being because for fucks sake, no
one is perfect and youre a fool if you try to be.
SELF WORTH
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Im done deferring to opinion.
Im done searching and yearning
for approval from people who
havent even heard of the women
who inspire my poetry.
Im done defining my worth as a
person and my merit as an artist
by the indignity of rejection from
your journal.
My poetry is beautiful, and
visceral. This doesnt change
when it isnt wanted forpublication.
I must be strong, I must be thick-
skinned. I must be kind, and I
must be forgiving.
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So, Mr. Editor,
Thank you for your rejection letter.
Thank you for promptly letting me know that
my work can be improved.
Thank you for giving me the fire to make my
work better, and better, so much so that it
eclipses your little magazine and is
remembered in years to come.
Thank you for raising my bar,
so I may climb it,
pole-dance on it,
do chin ups with it
and melt it down
when Im done.
Thank you, Mr. Editor. Really.
Kindest Regards,Audrey El-Osta
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Iamagreatmind
though,andyouare
amassivedick-butt.
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Audrey El-Osta is a Melbourne writer, studying
Linguistics & Literature at Monash University.
She is the Poetry Editor of Slink Chunk Press,
Vice President of the Monash Creative WritersClub and Creative Writing Coordinator of grotty
commie,a Monash-based newsletter.
Her work explores femininity, sexuality andmental illness, has won competitions and been
published internationally.
Recent publications include Bop Dead City
(Third Flash Poetry Contest Winner), Horror
Sleaze Trash, Make Your Mark #8, Danse
Macabre andCrack the Spine!
facebook.com/cafegradepoetryaudreyelosta.tumblr.com
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THANK YOU
FOR
READING
YOU ARE MY
FAVE, XO