t he mk e xperience u nderstanding y our m issionaries ’ c hildren
TRANSCRIPT
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THE MK EXPERIENCE
UNDERSTANDING YOUR MISSIONARIES’
CHILDREN
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WHY CARE FOR MKS?
Their Presence
Their Parents
Their Potential
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WHY CARE FOR MKS?
Their Presence
Their Parents
Their Potential– Language Skills
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WHY CARE FOR MKS?
Their Presence
Their Parents
Their Potential– Language Skills– Cross-cultural Skills
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WHY CARE FOR MKS?
Their Presence
Their Parents
Their Potential– Language Skills– Cross-cultural Skills– World View
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WHY CARE FOR MKS?
Their Presence
Their Parents
Their Potential– Language Skills– Cross-cultural Skills– World View– Maturity
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WHY CARE FOR MKS?
Their Presence
Their Parents
Their Potential– Language Skills– Cross-cultural Skills– World View– Maturity– God View
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness - “There’s no place like home”
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness - “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance culturally
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Foreigner
Looks DifferentThinks
different
Hidden Immigrant
Looks alikeThinks different
Adopted
Looks different
Thinks alike
Mirror
Looks alikeThinks alike
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CULTURE IS LIKE AN ICEBERG
How much do you see?
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There’s a lot more to it
than you may realize!
How much is unseen?
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•Language•Behavior•Externals (food, clothing, hairstyles, entertainment, etc.)__________________________
BeliefsWhat is true/right?
ValuesWhat is important?
AssumptionsWhat is obvious to everybody?
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally Lots of Unknowns
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally Lots of Unknowns Special knowledge without use
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally
Out-of-Sync Developmentally
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally
Out-of-Sync Developmentally Vocationally
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally
Out-of-Sync Developmentally Vocationally Socially
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally
Out-of-Sync Developmentally Vocationally Socially Identity
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally
Out-of-Sync Developmentally
Unresolved Grief
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally
Out-of-Sync Developmentally
Unresolved Grief
Insecurity in Relationships
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally
Out-of-Sync Developmentally
Unresolved Grief
Insecurity in Relationships
Synthesizing Identities
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CHALLENGES MKS FACE
Rootlessness “There’s no place like home”
Off-balance Culturally
Out-of-Sync Developmentally
Unresolved Grief
Insecurity in Relationships
Synthesizing Identities
Healing from trauma
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WHAT YOU CAN DO
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WHAT YOU CAN DOOFFER EMOTIONAL SUPPORTIf possible, cultivate the relationship when they are young so you are in a position to help when they are older. PRAY FOR THEM!!Learn about the transition process so you’ll know what is normal (if unsettling). And be patient and gentle when they’re in transition – they’ll stop acting so “crazy” and negative in a year or two.
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STAGES OF TRANSITION
Honeymoon stage (typically lasts 1 week-1 month)– Everything is great! Reverse Culture Shock (lasts a few months to 1-2 years)– Avoidance (Avoiding everything)– Anger (“Everything is different and bad/wrong”)– Mockery (“Everything is different and stupid”)Readjustment– Tolerance (“Things are different but OK”)– Understanding (“Things are different but reasonable”)– Creativity (Things are different but open to interaction”)
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WHAT YOU CAN DOOFFER EMOTIONAL SUPPORTIf possible, cultivate the relationship when they are young so you are in a position to help when they are older. PRAY FOR THEM!! – Learn about the transition process so you’ll know what is normal (if unsettling). And be patient and gentle when they’re in transition – they’ll stop acting so “crazy” and negative in a year or two.LISTEN!!!!! Don’t take it personally when they criticize the U.S. and constantly compare it unfavorably with overseas. Don’t assume you understand – and never say you do unless you are an MK (or TCK) yourself. Be careful about minimizing their experiences or pain. Be alert for signs (verbal or non-verbal) of serious trouble (severe depression, suicidal thoughts, risky behavior, etc.).
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WHAT YOU CAN DOOFFER PRACTICAL HELPBe a cultural mentor and/or help them find a peer mentor.Offer them a “home away from home.” Invite them to be part of your family activities…then invite them again! Send notes/cards, emails, care packages, etc. to remind them you are thinking of them and praying for them.Offer practical assistance with new things:•Getting a Driver’s License •Banking and finances
•Completing income tax or financial aid forms
•Applying for jobs
•Getting to the doctor or dentist (and understanding their health insurance)
•Storing their stuff during summer vacation
•Getting around (transporation) •Finding summer accommodations
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