Suggestions for TeachingElaboration

Adapted by Kristine Gooding from: OSPI Instructional Support Materials for Writing

 

• To share teaching strategies that will help students develop a piece of writing that elaborates on a single idea and addresses the needs and interests of a particular audience.

• Elaboration is critical for clear and effective writing.

Purpose

Alignment with K-2 GLE for WritingEALR 3: The student writes clearly and effectively.Component 3.1: Develops ideas and organizes writing.

GLE K 1 2

3.1.1

Analyzes ideas, selects topic, and adds detail.

•Draws and labels pictures. •Dictates ideas that match pictures to a scribe when necessary.

•Uses words and pictures to express ideas.

•Uses multicultural picture books as models to generate ideas.

Analyzes ideas, selects topic, adds detail, and elaborates.

•Develops ideas for topics orally and visually (e.g., discusses, draws, and/or writes to develop ideas).

•Develops and chooses from a list of general topics for writing (e.g., pets, friends, favorite places).

•Elaborates on ideas using descriptive words and phrases (e.g., My yellow striped cat jumped on my bed.).

•Selects title for a piece of writing.

Analyzes ideas, selects topic, adds detail, and elaborates.

• Develops list of specific topics for writing (e.g., playing with a pet or friend).

• Selects from a list of specific topics for writing.

• Maintains focus on a specific topic (e.g., writes and draws in a science journal about scientific observations such as the life cycle of a plant or animal).

• Includes supporting information (e.g., adjectives, explanatory sentences, examples, and personal experiences).

• Selects appropriate title for a piece of writing.

Alignment with 3-5 GLE Writing

EALR 3: The student writes clearly and effectively.Component 3.1: Develops ideas and organizes writing.

GLE 3 4 5

3.1.1

Analyzes ideas, selects topic, adds detail, and elaborates.

• Selects from a wide range of topics (e.g., friendship, volcanoes).

•Maintains focus on specific topic.

• Provides details and/or support (e.g., examples, descriptions, reasons). • Uses personal experience and observation to support ideas.

•Develops characters, setting, and events in narratives.

• Selects appropriate title for a piece of writing.

Analyzes ideas, selects a narrow topic, and elaborates using specific details and/or examples.

• Narrows topic (e.g., from general topic, such as “pets,” to specific topic, such as “My dog is smart.”).

•Selects details relevant to the topic to elaborate (e.g., adds detail to each main point using more than one sentence; uses specific words and phrases, reasons, anecdotes, facts, descriptions, and examples).

• Uses personal experiences, observations, and/or research to support opinions and ideas (e.g., collects, organizes, and uses data to support conclusions in math, science, or social studies).

• Develops character, setting, and events within plot when writing a narrative.

Analyzes ideas, selects a narrow topic, and elaborates using specific details and/or examples.

•Narrows topic with controlling idea (e.g., from general topic, such as baseball, to specific topic, such as “The Mariners are my favorite baseball team.”).

•Selects details relevant to the topic to extend ideas and develop elaboration (e.g., specific words and phrases, reasons, anecdotes, facts, descriptions, examples).

•Uses personal experiences, observations, and research to support opinions and ideas (e.g., data relevant to the topic to support conclusions in math, science, or social studies; appropriate anecdotes to explain or persuade).

•Varies method of developing character (e.g., dialogue) and setting (e.g., through the eyes of a character) in narratives.

Alignment with K-2 GLE Writing

EALR 3: The student writes clearly and effectively.

Component 3.2: Uses appropriate style.

GLE K 1 2

3.2.2

Uses a variety of words.

• Builds a rich vocabulary through talking, listening, and language activities.

• Uses words from environmental print (e.g., stop signs, cereal boxes, logos).

• Uses classroom resources (e.g., word walls, name charts, labels, other student/teacher-generated resources).

Uses a variety of words.

•Builds a rich vocabulary through listening, talking, signing, writing, and language activities.

• Uses descriptive words (e.g., color words, sensory words, size words).

•Uses classroom resources (e.g., personal dictionaries, word walls, other student/teacher-generated resources).

Uses a variety of words.

•Builds a rich vocabulary through listening, talking, writing, and language activities.

• Uses descriptive words (e.g., color words, sensory words, size words).

• Uses classroom resources (e.g., personal dictionaries, word walls, other student/teacher-generated resources).

Alignment with 3-5 GLE Writing

EALR 3: The student writes clearly and effectively.

Component 3.2: Uses appropriate style.

GLE 3 4 5

3.2.2

Uses language appropriate for a specific audience and purpose.

•Selects specific words (e.g., hollered vs. said) and specialized vocabulary (e.g., transparent vs. clear).

• Selects interesting and effective words from various sources (e.g., multicultural literature, television, environmental print, cultural background).

• Uses literary devices (e.g., onomatopoeia,

alliteration).

Uses language appropriate for a specific audience and purpose.

•Uses precise words (e.g., vivid verbs — screeched, hovered, absorbed; specific nouns — granite, longhouse, cedar).

•Uses specialized vocabulary in informational writing (e.g., tessellate, parallelogram, butte, carbohydrate).

• Uses literary and sound devices (e.g., similes, personification, and alliteration).

Uses language appropriate for a specific audience and purpose.

•Uses precise language (e.g., powerful verbs, specific descriptors).

•Uses formal, informal, and specialized

•language (e.g., photosynthesis, ratio, expedition) appropriate for audience and purpose.

•Uses literary and sound devices (e.g., similes, personification, rhythm).

•Selects words for effect.

Alignment with K-2 GLE Writing

EALR 3: The student writes clearly and effectively.Component 3.2: Uses appropriate style.

GLE K 1 2

3.2.3

Understands sentence fluency.

•Listens to and discusses different sentence structures in read-alouds (e.g., “Do you notice that some sentences are short and some are long?”).

•Participates in shared reading/writing of poems, songs, chants, and prose.

Understands sentence fluency.

•Participates in shared reading/writing of poems, songs, chants, and prose.

•Uses simple and some compound sentences.

Uses more than one sentence type and structure.

• Writes a variety of sentence beginnings (e.g., starts with a prepositional phrase: “After recess, we will start our writing workshop.”).

• Writes a variety of sentence structures (e.g., “My best friend sat by me at lunch. We talked as we ate our burritos.”).

• Writes a variety of sentence types (e.g., declarative, imperative, exclamatory, interrogative).

• Writes poetry with patterns.

Alignment with 3-5 GLE Writing

EALR 3: The student writes clearly and effectively.Component 3.2: Uses appropriate style.

GLE 3 4 5

3.2.3

Uses more than one sentence type and structure.

• Writes a variety of sentence beginnings (e.g., starts with an adverb: “Quickly, the snake slithered away.”).

• Writes a variety of sentence lengths.

• Writes a variety of sentence structures (e.g., “I went outside. The streets were muddy after the storm ended.”).

• Writes a variety of sentence types (e.g., declarative, imperative, exclamatory, interrogative).

• Writes free verse poems with repeated sentence beginnings.

Uses a variety of sentences.

•Writes a variety of sentence beginnings (e.g., starts with an introductory adverb clause: “If you want to see an ant up close, you should use a magnifying glass.”).

•Writes a variety of sentence lengths.

•Writes a variety of sentence structures (e.g., “My dog enjoys music and howls when we listen to certain songs. It makes me laugh. After his song is over, I give him a treat.”).

•Writes song lyrics with a specific rhythm.

Uses a variety of sentences.

•Writes a variety of sentence lengths.

•Writes a variety of sentence beginnings (e.g., starts with a participial phrase: “Laughing loudly, they walked down the hall.”).

•Writes a variety of sentence structures (e.g., “Tran, busy with his homework, didn’t hear the telephone at first. Although he wanted to keep working, Tran took the call. He kept it short.”).

•Writes with a rhythm pattern.

Links to the Writing WASL

The quality of elaboration is directly related to scores on COS portion. The best writing has multiple layers of relevant elaboration.

Specific layered elaboration was the most critical element that differentiated between scores of “2” and “3” and scores of “3” and “4.”

Top scoring WASL papers show clear audience awareness.

Elaboration Module Agenda

Session 1: Defining Elaboration

Session 2: Asking Questions that Lead to Elaboration Recognizing Elaboration Show, Don't Tell

Session 3: Specific, Concrete Details versus General

Language Elaboration within Sentences Criteria for Assessment

DEFINING ELABORATION

What is Elaboration?

To tell the reader more using…

• Descriptions or Definitions• Examples• Anecdotes• Facts or statistics

Using descriptions to elaborate…

Descriptions create vivid images for the reader.

When my room was a mess there were clothes that my brother left on his bed and there were papers all around the room. Toys, crayons, robots, and my big robot were taken apart and bargain hunter cards scattered everywhere. I didn’t make up my bed. You think that was all? There was some food around the room.

Develop your idea with description.

One day when I came home from school, my mom said go to your room. But I said I never go in there. I could die. An avalanche of underwear would fall on me. But she said get in there. Sure enough, an avalanche of underwear fell on me. Boy, did it stink. When I got out of it, I said to myself I’m going on a journey. I was going through a T-shirt tunnel when suddenly around the corner I saw a snake. Good, it was only a rubber one. When I got out of the T-shirt tunnel, I went into the sock domain. I walked around for a few minutes when I turned a corner. I saw a lion, when it was only a stuffed animal. When I got out, I went into a small thing called a pants city. When I turned a corner and saw an alligator, I busted through the robes and ran through the door. When I got out, I told my mom I’m never going in there again. I was almost killed.

Description - your turn

• When describing something in writing show don’t just tell your reader. Be specific and try to create an image for your reader.

• Work with a partner to write a paragraph that describes a room in your school. ELABORATE using sensory details.

Using definitions to elaborate…

• Definitions are restatements of an unfamiliar word or phrase to tell what it means. This sounds like…

The best part of our hot lunch program is the A La Carte. What I mean by A La Carte is the little deli line past the lunch line where you can buy cookies, slushies, and candy bars.

Develop your idea with a definition…

Dinosaurs

Animals are one of the most interesting things. But the animals that I think are the most interesting are the dinosaurs. They are extinct, not living anymore, but I still like them. My four faivorite are the Triceratops, Stegasaurus, the Anklyasaurus and Tyrannosaurus Rex. Why do I like these paticualar dinosaurs? Because they have good protection. Take the Triceratops for instance. It has three horns on it’s head. It was one of the only dinosaurs that could beat Tyrannosaurus Rex. Speaking of Tyrannosaurus Rex he was the most feared dinosaur. He had six inch long teeth. I wonder if he brushed his teeth. Oh well. Another well protected dinosaur was the Anklyasaurus. This dinosaur had protection of a armed ball, like a hardshell, and sidespikes.

Definition - your turn

• Defining specific words shows an awareness of audience.

• Talk to a partner about some educational “lingo” used at schools. What would you do to define it for parents?

Using examples to elaborate…

• Examples provide more specific information about an idea. This sounds like…

The cats were all acting like they were crazy. For example, one jumped at me with all …

We had a barrage of different weather last week: hail, rain, snow, and sunshine.

My brothers always seem to pick on me. For instance, they may hide my soccer shoes before a game.

Develop your idea with an example…

The game of golf can be played for an entire lifetime and also by yourself. People of any age can go out and play a round of golf whenever they want as opposed to team sports. For example, football, soccer, and volleyball take an entire team of people to play. How many times are you going to call up ten or more of your friends and go play sports?

Examples - your turn

• Examples are an effective way to help the reader understand your ideas.

• Tell your partner about a situation in your life and provide him or her with an example.

Using an anecdote to elaborate…

• An anecdote is a short narrative inserted into an essay that develops an idea. This sounds like…

Hey, I remember the time when I had to carry my . . .

Once when I was in middle school, the kids would always. . .

Develop your idea with an anecdote…

Rainy DayA rainy day does not have to be

boring... I say it’s fun when you think of some games to play. One rainy day last month, I played Hands Down and I played girl talk with my sister. I also played Hands Down with my family. It’s fun to play games when it’s a rainy day. It can be fun, you can play games like hide in seek on a riany day. Games are fun to play inside on rainy days.

Anecdotes - your turn

• Think of someone you know that tells lots of stories.

• This is another effective way to make or develop an idea.

• Share some anecdotes with your partner.

Develop your idea with facts or statistics…

Does Healthy Food Sound Disgusting?

Does healthy food sound disgusting? Well, it is not. Some fruits and vegatables are very tasty. There are carrots, corn, celery, potatoes, tomatoes, and lettuce, grapes, apples, oranges, strawberries, peaches, and plums are good too. Yet fruits and vegatables aren’t the only health food. Breads such as muffins, bagels, rolls, waffles, and pancakes are good for you too. Meats and meat alternatives such as nuts, chicken, eggs, and fish are wholesome for you. Dairy products are immensely healthy for you. It’s still okay to eat ice cream and cake, but don’t eat them so often. Why should you eat healthy food? The problem is that if you eat junk food, you’re eating food you don’t’ need. Another thing that happens is that you can get very fat, 40% of children are obese, but if you eat healthy food, you won’t get fat very easily and you will have more energy. Even if you will be less popular, tell your friends that eating right is much better.

Using facts or statistics to elaborate…

• Facts and statistics are the numbers (data) and information that help support your idea. This sounds like…

Mom, did you know that 98% of all my friends get to stay up until 1:00 AM on weekends?

Well, son, did you know that 3 out of 4 parents would have grounded you for staying out so late?

Kids who smoke at an early age are prone to heart attacks later in life.

Facts and Statistics - your turn

• Talk to a partner about a statistic from your school.

• Think of what statistics would convince an audience.

• Share your idea with the group.

Before the next meeting, I agree to try the following with my students…• I will teach my students two

techniques for elaboration.

• Students will practice elaborating using the techniques.

• I will bring three student samples to share at our next meeting.