stages of parenting children with #dyslexia
TRANSCRIPT
Paren&ng Children with Dyslexia: An Odyssey of Stages
Carolyn D. Cowen June 8, 2015
HOT TOPICS In Dyslexia & Literacy
Dyslexia DiaBLOG © Cowen
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It’s been said that parents of children with dyslexia often travel through stages similar to “grief stages”
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GRIEF
READING
Kübler-Ross Stages of Grief
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Kübler-Ross Stages of Grief
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STAGES OF GRIEF HYPOTHESIS:
A series of five emotional stages are experienced upon the death of a
loved one
Kübler-Ross Stages of Grief
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REALITY IS MESSIER THAN CONSTRUCTS:
Of course, these aren’t ALL the possible emotions and they can
occur in any order, even recycle
Still, such frameworks can offer perspective in situations where people transition through stages
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PARENTING KIDS W/
DYSLEXIA
READING
My Child has Dyslexia!
Coming to terms with a child’s dyslexia can be an emotional journey
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For example, when our children are born, we tend to imagine scenes more like this … Above
Average
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(It’s called the “Lake Wobegone Effect.”)
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school
NOT scenes like this! Embracing a different scenario can be challenging
Search for answers
Diagnosis
Relief
@school
My Child has Dyslexia!
Crisis
Worries/Doubts
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STAGE I: Worries/doubts alternate with denial; crisis brings things to a head and triggers search for answers;
diagnosis brings relief but often anger, especially at school
Parent stages might look something like this ...
I.
Search for answers
Diagnosis
Relief
@school Fight for my kid!
Find community & support
Learn rights/responsibilities Nurture
my kid’s strengths
My Child has Dyslexia!
Crisis
Worries/Doubts
Learn to advocate
© Cowen
STAGE II: Learn to fight for child/refine advocacy skills; learn rights/responsibilities and how to nurture
child’s strengths; find supportive community
Parent stages might look something like this ...
II.
I.
Search for answers
Diagnosis
Relief
@school Fight for my kid!
Fight for kids like mine Find
community & support
Learn rights/responsibilities Nurture
my kid’s strengths
My Child has Dyslexia!
Crisis
Learn to advocate
© Cowen
STAGE III: Fight for ALL kids with dyslexia; learn more about dyslexia and related issues (sometimes becoming
an advocate or OG teacher); forge strategic alliances
Parent stages might look something like this ...
Worries/Doubts
Learn more about dyslexia & related issues
Forge strategic alliances/partnerships
III.
I.
II.
Search for answers
Diagnosis
Relief
@school Fight for my kid!
Fight for kids like mine Find
community & support
Learn rights/responsibilities Nurture
my kid’s strengths
Learn more about dyslexia & related issues
Learn about EBP, Implementation
Science, ed-policy, legislation, etc
(sustainable change)
Improve system for ALL kids My Child
has Dyslexia!
Crisis
Learn to advocate
Forge strategic alliances/partnerships
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STAGE IV: Go deeper—learn about things like evidence-based practices (EBP) and Implementation Science; work to improve the education system for ALL vulnerable children
Parent stages might look something like this ...
Worries/Doubts
III.
IV.
I.
II.
REMEMBER: This isn’t necessarily linear or hierarchical. And, depending on what’s going on with our kids, we might even recycle.
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(Other than Stage I, we might find a healthy way of being at any stage.)
PARENTING KIDS W/
DYSLEXIA
READING
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THE POINT IS As you work to help your child, sometimes it’s helpful to:
• Get out of the weeds • View the big picture • Understand some of your own milestones in the journey ahead
I.
II. III.
IV.
What stage(s) might you in? What stage do you want to be in?
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PARENTING KIDS W/
DYSLEXIA
FINALLY: You don’t need to travel through these stages alone. Many fine organizations are ready to help. The International Dyslexia Association (IDA)—with in-‐depth, evidence-‐based information—is one of the best!
eida.org
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carolyndcowen
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