shaadi: life time investment. marriage : a crisis? marriage in islam benefits of marriage essentials...
TRANSCRIPT
Shaadi: Life Time Investment
Marriage : A Crisis?
Marriage in Islam
Benefits of Marriage
Essentials of Muslim Marriage
Spouse Selection
Essential Tips
Outline
Marriage: A Crisis?
Marriage : A Crisis?
• Married couple with children= 37.4%• Married couple without children =
33.1%• Family break down = 50%
in Western SocietyFamily Crisis
(Canadian census 2001)
Marriage : A Crisis?
• Every two marriages, there is one divorce
• 2.04 million males are single parents.• 9.68 million females are single
parents.• 28% parents live with one parent.
In the USADivorce Rate
(Divorce Magazine)
Marriage : A Crisis ?
• Divorce rate on rise: California: 37% Georgia: 29% Turkey + Egypt: 10%• Lack of reference
points for second generation and younger families.
Impact onMuslim Societies
(Dr . Illyas Ba-Yunus, Professor Sociology, State University of New york)
Marriage In IslamA Life time Investment
NIKAAHA form of Ibadah in Islam
Staus of Marriage In Islam
Rasulullah(saw) has referred to it as “half of Deen”.
NIKAAH
Status of Marriage In Islam
Islam considers marriage a social obligation, an act which is greatly
admired by Allah.
Social Obligation
Status of Marriage In Islam
Nikaah - is the (only) natural
relationship between man
and woman.
Natural Relationship
Status of Marriage In Islam
O mankind, fear your Lord, who created you from one soul and created from it its mate and dispersed from both of them many men and women. And fear Allah , through whom you ask one another, and the wombs. Indeed Allah is ever, over
you, an Observer. [An-Nisa: 1]
In the Light of Qur’an:
Status of Marriage In Islam
And We have already sent messengers before you and assigned to them wives and descendants. And it was not for a messenger to
come with a sign except by permission of Allah . For every term is a decree.
[Ar-Raad, 13:38]
In the Light of Qur’an:
Status of Marriage In Islam
Who will inherit me and inherit from the family of Jacob. And make him, my Lord,
pleasing [to You].”Verse 6: Surah maryam
In the Light of Qur’an:
Marriage in Islam
• Family status• No age barrier• Variations in
Nikaah: – Badal: Exchanging wives
– Before birth – Shighar: Exchanging
sisters and daughters in marriage so no dowry or mehr
– Maqaat: Marrying step mother
Pre-Islamic Arabia
of Marriage in Islam
Foundation
Foundation of Marriage in Islam
And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquillity in them; and He placed between you affection and
mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.
Al-Rum: 21
For People who give thoughtSigns
Foundation of Marriage in Islam
They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them.
Al-Baqarah: 187
For Each otherGarments
Of MarriageAdvantages
Advantages of Marriage
‘’When Allah grants one a righteous wife, He has helped him (by that) to preserve half of his religion. Let him then fear and revere Allah in regard to the other half.”
(At-Tabarani)
Preservation of
Faith
Advantages of Marriage
Abdullah bin Mas'ud (RA) reported that Allah's Messenger (SAW) said to us:
0 young men, those among you who can support a wife should marry, for it
restrains eyes (from casting evil glances) and preserves one from immorality; but he who cannot afford It should observe fast for it is a means of controlling the
sexual desire. (Muslim)
Preservation of
Chastity
Advantages of Marriage
Al-Baqarah: 187
Enjoying
Love Mercy Security
Benefits of Marriagefor society
Benefits of Marriage for society
Preservation of
HumanRace
Benefits of Marriage for society
Preservation of
KinshipTies
Benefits of Marriage for society
Safeguarding Society from
MoralDegradatio
n
Benefits of Marriage for society
Establishing
FamilyEnvironme
nt
Benefits of Marriage for society
Increasing number of
MUSLIMS
For Muslim MarriageEssentials
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
Commitment
Contentment
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
Compromise
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
MutualCaring
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
Practice
SkillsCommunication
MannersExcellent
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
Learning to
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
Empathize
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
SINCEREBeing
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
LOVE
Essentials for Muslim Marriage
Forgiveness
Spouse Selection
Spouse selection
“ Women are married for four qualities, some are married for wealth, some for
the family(lineage) status, some for beauty and some for the Deen (piety). Marry a woman for her Deen and you
shall be happy/successful.” (Bukhari/ Muslim)
Spouse selection
“If a man comes to you seeking marriage, and you are satisfied with
his din and character, marry him- lest a fitnah and great destruction
become rampant on the earth.” (Tirmadhi)
Spouse Selection
WhereAnd how do you select?
Pre-Wedding
Islamic Principles
1. Let family check
out for you and
priority is piety.
2. Do Istikhara.
3. See each other
before marriage
Steps to Islamic Principles
To Do’s
Pre-Wedding Islamic Principles
4. Significance of Kuff
5. To take members of one`s family to propose
6. To keep making dua to Allah to guide one and to give one the correct partner
7. The proposal should be submitted to the Wali (guardian) of the girl.
Steps to Islamic PrinciplesPre-Wedding Islamic Principles
To Do’s
Steps to Islamic Principles
‘For, indeed, it is an adulteress who gives herself in marriage (without her wali’s consent).’
(Ibn Majah)
• ‘A Marriage Contract is not valid without a Wali.’ (Abu Dawood)
• Father, grandfather, son, brother, Uncle etc.
Woman’s Wali
Steps to Islamic Principles
• To date and court the woman before Nikaah.• To phone each other.• To send a proposal to a divorcee/widow during
her iddat.• To submit a proposal when someone else has
already proposed to the same woman. Rasulullah (saw) has stopped us from doing this.
NOT ALLOWEDWhat one is
Steps to Islamic Principles
• Presence of Wali• Ejab O Qabool• Khutba Nikaah• Mehr
Compulsory Components
Of Nikah
Examples of Some Marriages
The Prophet’s Model• Hazrat Khadija
and Prophet Mohammad SAW– She was 40, he was
25– First Muslim to
accept Islam– Devoted and loving
wife– Always stood by the
Prophet in moments of trial and difficulty
• Hazrat Aaisha and Prophet Mohammad SAW– Got married at a young
age– Examples of love and
affection– Source of pleasure, joy
and comfort to her husband
– Vast treasure of Islamic knowledge and a teacher of scholars and experts
• Which month?• How to announce?• How to enjoy?
RitualsIn Marriage
Avoiding Poisonous Elements
ElementsPoisonous
GREED
Avoiding Poisonous Elements
Show Off
PoisonousElements
Avoiding Poisonous Elements
Excessive Spending
PoisonousElements
Avoiding Poisonous Elements
• Adopting Haraam customs
PoisonousElements
Some Tips
Some Tips
• How to Simplify?• How to avoid extravagance• How to handle photo shoot
session?• How to handle unexpected free
mixing at wedding?• How to minimize extravagance?
On your own Wedding
Tackle Smart
Some Tips
• Practice simplicity
• Provide support for Halal to bride and groom
• Avoid extravagance
• Cut out Haraam rituals
Save Yourself
Some Tips
Make Dua
Get Married, Not for yourself, but for the future of your
children, they are getting late for school and the fee is increasing day by day
Think Economically