Session 3

Parent Lesson 8:

Parenting Styles

Objectives

Participants will:

• Explore four common parenting styles

• Identify your parenting style

• Gain skills in using a democratic style of parenting that is firm but fair

Icebreaker

Dominating

• Threatens, intimidates, commands

• Rigid and controlling

• Offers very little affection, warmth, encouragement or praise

• Enforces a clear set of expectations and monitors children’s activities carefully

Possible Child Outcomes

• Rebellious or submissive

• Manipulative and sneaky

• Power struggles with parents

• Only follow rules when parent is present

• Become power-oriented with peers (the bully)

• Have difficulty making decisions

• Act distrustful

Permissive

• Tries to be child’s friend

• Too busy or distracted

• Substitutes “things” for time or commitment

• Rescues

• Offers few guidelines

• Inconsistent

• Does too much for the child

Possible Child Outcomes

• Insecure

• Searching for boundaries

• Little respect for authority

• Poor self-control

• Self-indulging

• Doesn’t understand cause and effect

• Doesn’t follow rules

• Irresponsible

Unengaged

• Inconsistent

• Little nurturing

• No expectations

• Selfish

• Not emotionally or mentally engaged

• Little respect for children and others

Possible Child Outcomes

• Little respect for others

• No responsibility or may be too responsible for their age if expected to raise themselves and siblings

• High anxiety

Positive Parenting Style

• Firm but loving

• Sets clear boundaries

• Follows through with appropriate consequences

• Reasonable expectations

Positive Parenting Style

• Allow for learning from mistakes

• Model expected behaviors

• Are confident, flexible, respectful

• Model teamwork, give and take, and share the power

Possible Child Outcomes

• Confident

• Secure

• Respects self and others

• Responsible

• Self-disciplined

• Inner motivation

• Closer family relationships

What’s your style?

What will you work on?

• Be firm but loving

• Set clear boundaries

• Follow through with appropriate consequences

• Set reasonable expectations

• Allow for learning from mistakes

• Model expected behaviors

• Be confident, flexible, respectful

• Model teamwork, give and take, share the power

When Parents Disagree

“Out of balance” happens when one parent becomes

more strict or lenient in response to the other

parent’s style.

Out of Balance BalanceBalance happens when parents agree on the

issues and consequences, consider the outcomes

and support one another.

Gearing Up for Middle School

• Discoveries? • Questions? • Stories?

Thank you for participating!

See you next session.

Rock - dominating, rigid with rules to follow

The moon – has influence but seldom is seen and is very distance and uninvolved

Tennis ball – firm and flexible with clear boundaries

Marshmallow - manipulated easily, no substance