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Ruby Drops Reflections of Rainbow on Ripples Naseha Sameen [email protected] WWW.SEVENSOLUTIONS.IN

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I wish they were poems. They are not. They are cries of my soul and happiness that dropped from my eyes as tears. They are witness to my flight of freedom and testimony of my shackles. I am but a rainbow, made of smile and tears, so are the Ruby Drops.

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  • Ruby DropsReflections of Rainbow on Ripples

    Naseha Sameen [email protected] WWW.SEVENSOLUTIONS.IN

  • Contents

    1. Woman, Me .........................................................................................................................................3

    2. Sublime Visage ....................................................................................................................................5

    3. Rusty Anchor .......................................................................................................................................8

    4. Bleeding heart ...................................................................................................................................12

    5. Terrified Times ..................................................................................................................................14

    6. My Canvass ........................................................................................................................................16

    7. Invisible Foe .......................................................................................................................................17

    8. Stringed Doll ......................................................................................................................................18

    9. Thirsty Lips.........................................................................................................................................19

    10. Unspoken Words ...............................................................................................................................21

    11. Unquenched Thirst ............................................................................................................................23

    12. Vulture Voice .....................................................................................................................................24

    13. Fallen .................................................................................................................................................26

    14. Dim December ..................................................................................................................................28

    15. Death of an Elf ...................................................................................................................................29

    16. Burning Desire ...................................................................................................................................31

    17. The Scream ........................................................................................................................................32

    18. The Promise .......................................................................................................................................33

    19. Silver Lining .......................................................................................................................................38

    20. Glorious Death ..................................................................................................................................39

    21. Companion ........................................................................................................................................40

    22. Dark Angel .........................................................................................................................................41

    23. The Choice .........................................................................................................................................43

    24. Faraway place ....................................................................................................................................45

    25. When Moments Live .........................................................................................................................46

    26. Life - Protectors .................................................................................................................................47

    27. Breathe another Day .........................................................................................................................49

    28. Goes On .... ........................................................................................................................................50

    29. Am Here .............................................................................................................................................51

    30. Nostalgic about future ......................................................................................................................53

    31. Lost Found .........................................................................................................................................54

  • 32. Undead Dead .....................................................................................................................................55

    33. Unknown Horizon Beckons ...............................................................................................................56

    34. Lonely heart.......................................................................................................................................57

    35. Forgotten Memory ............................................................................................................................58

    36. The Rain .............................................................................................................................................59

    37. Beaten Path .......................................................................................................................................60

    38. Searching Peace ................................................................................................................................62

    39. Pain of Rubaisha ................................................................................................................................63

    40. Afraid Heart .......................................................................................................................................64

    41. Silent Lord..........................................................................................................................................66

    42. Illusive Heart......................................................................................................................................67

    43. Equal Eye ...........................................................................................................................................69

    44. Wishing on a Falling Star ...................................................................................................................71

    45. I Opt for Curse ...................................................................................................................................72

  • Woman, Me

    Once again, I thread

    on the same ways I dread.

    Amidst questioning eyes ready

    to hunt in me, in manner greedy.

    These are the very eyes who,

    at times give me pedestals.

    These are the ones at times,

    who drag me to pedals.

    I am a darling daughter at times,

    And a burden when troubles chimes!?!

    Adorable wife am I, around which his world revolves.

    When I speak of my heart - Where does his love dissolve?

    A mother I am, gave out my life to bring another life.

    A Goddess in their eyes, running around for them. Is it all I strive?

    Is there no other image for me save those?

    Don't I have feeling both of highs and lows

    When they all speak, its the way world is

    When I do --- Its what vanity and ego is?

    Don't I have a right over a drop of tear?

    Why do I hide to shed them? Why this fear?

    How long will their wishes over-weigh mine?

    How long will I wear 'a changed me' for their eyes to shine?

  • December 30, 2004. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Sublime Visage

    This moment,

    A moment of realization.

    A moment of peace.

    The moment I talked to myself

    In a distance sublime vista

    Saw I myself, eyes red with

    Night soil of dreams last night

    Just before dawn, out in wetty dew.

    In a red saree crumbled under the

    Strains of fiery streaks of drops

    Of the stars that showered long

    Night of unknown hands of visions.

    Breathing full, twisting every bit of

    Strained me, into liberated self.

    Drawing back from the unseen arms of

    Unknown senses enthralled for long.

  • Sun was still sleeping, so was the

    Serpentine river in sedateness progress

    Trees whistling soft murmerous tune

    In its soft sleepy voice drowned in itself.

    Half opened eyes, half closed lips

    Plucked a fragrance of unknown

    Stranger known, felt and recognized

    To the every senses of mine.

    Smiling half wet-half baked soil

    Touching the inebriated steps

    Of deeply slept unslept night

    In the siesta of nameless realms

    Eyes had been elusive of him, not me.

    Whole night under the shadows of

    Flickering lamp in vibes of winter night

    I felt the warmth of summer evenings.

  • Night receded in slow pace to it settee.

    Morning yet to be awaken from the spell

    Allure of the untraced touch still stirring

    In a haze visage of the morning and mine.

    by naseha on Sunday, September 21, 2003 6:32:33 PM. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Rusty Anchor

    In borderless distant vista

    Covered with icy rocks.

    Saw I some rusty falling apart

    But strong anchors from by gone docks.

    Anchors, strong and proud of itself

    For steadiness it gave to ones rocking.

    Tearing the heart of the raging sea

    In depths itself and ship, locking.

    The tempest wrathed, raged and rocked

    Its screaming ferocious heart out.

    But steadily, majestically the craft waited

    Confidence on its anchor without doubt.

    Held the steady straight sturdy anchor

    The rocking craft over the wobbly waves.

  • Till sun was out from the dark billows

    Again were the waves an obedient slaves.

    Tempest passed, sailed she regally,

    With no shackles or fetters chaining her.

    Enjoying the ballad over the surf

    Floating on wings of air as light fur.

    Again tempest rose in sea,

    Anchors were dropped again.

    On every dark cloud and a drop

    The freedom of her was slain.

    Anchor held her safe, still killed

    Her stride every moment that yanked.

    No ears heard her complains, no eyes did

    The pain that within her heart clanked.

  • Sure, was her innocence, so was her gait

    Still why she wondered was the gale?

    Why she every sea-roar came her fetters?

    No matter it was staid or just a dale?

    Tired, worn out once of liberated self

    And again the chains ruling her soul.

    Unanswered of obligations of anchor yet

    Uncertain of the changing anchors role.

    Came she in insane stride hurtling in

    In the rocky icy dilapidated shore.

    Calmness fell upon her, no longer was

    The angst of next reverse role, no more.

    In peace she slept, disappearing slowly

    Slowly forgetting the turbulent time.

    But what remained was the rusty strong

  • Steady anchor remembering by gone clime.

    by naseha on September 21st, 2003. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Bleeding heart

    Peeping through window plane,

    The pale faced moon.

    Burns my heart like the melting,

    Sun of July noon.

    Fragrance of withering petals between,

    Pages of my poetry book.

    Brings reminiscence of yours back served,

    On edges of sharp hook.

    Those alleys where we walked together,

    Beckons us again.

    Where we lost our hearts to find others,

    To win the ultimate bargain.

    We met, flowed together and drifted apart,

    In turbulent times stream.

    But someday, somehow, well be back together,

    Its my belief, not dream.

    For your essence in some corner of my heart

    Still continues to beat.

    Resolving the promise, that some lanes exit

    Where again we shall meet.

    Holding hands we shall walk to far moor,

    Under the star lit night.

  • Or listen to our hearts throb with Philomela in woods

    Singing hidden from sight.

    The bonds in our heart of true love

    Is too strong for us to break.

    Innocent and pure as morning dew

    As lively as raki.

    But it hid under the mantle of ego

    For a moment or two.

    And we walked on different paths,

    A silly thing to do.

    Yet, I know image of mine in your heart

    Like fragrance still lingers on.

    Then why else I still live after you,

    My love, my life has gone.

    Hearts are the real crazy things can hear

    Across distance and across time.

    No words required, they understand hearts feeling

    As their throb echoes in climes.

    by naseha on February 19th, 2005. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Terrified Times

    Waiting for time to spread death

    Some scorpions in caves, hiding

    With death in one hand, destruction in the other

    On terror horses of planes, envelops and bombs - riding.

    Laughing children are silent today

    Blood oozing out of their stiff lips

    Sky is still ablaze with burning Center

    Lights are flashing all around, even as Sun dips.

    Terrified eyes look up again

    Again is the reign of terror

    From sky falls not the nectar

    Bombs come down as halls of horror.

    Streets wear a deserted look

    Houses are in the state same

    Crawling like worms today, men

    Depressed, blind, dead or lame.

    One savior and another terrorist

    They both did have a fight

    Perhaps who lost was the darkness

    Perhaps who won was the light.

    Caught between the warring camps

    Humanity did bleed

    Seeing bombs hi, planes crash

    Creams from terrified eyes did flee.

    In this mad power hungry racist race

    I know not, who won and who lost

  • Standing by the graves of innocent in East and West both

    I know human race has paid a high cost.

    by naseha on 25th Jan 2002. naseha, All rights reserved

  • My Canvass

    Not that I have no paint now,

    Nether has my feeling dried up.

    But still with blank canvass

    I sit with untouched water in cup.

    My hands want to move

    brushes nimbly against the white.

    To give a shape, to my unshared

    thoughts, red, blue, dark and light.

    Like fragrance they want to spread

    On the wings of air - my virgin feelings.

    Through the deepest pit, reaching out

    the unscaled heights of blue ceiling.

    All these and lot more come crowding

    to me as I sit with my brush dry.

    Should I color the canvass with

    tears of my smiles or the smiles of my cry?

    But then what do I paint and why in alien land.

    Where everybody speaks in alien tongue -- who would then understand.

    by naseha on 26th Dec 2001. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Invisible Foe

    Blood stands still when the

    leaf lazily frickles

    Somehow heart stops with fear.

    No matter where I go

    Every moment I do look back

    To see my invisible foe

    I run fast in all lanes known and unknown

    But that gripping fear follows me

    For him all lanes are too well known

    I stopped to think, who is my enemy

    whose eyes daunt me

    who creates a whirlpool within me

    Surprising as it seems, I found none

    who could eclipse,

    a bright day from my own Sun.

    But still that fear haunts and hunts me

    In vain I try to reason the hunter

    who daunts me? -- the Time, the Fate, You or its Me?!

    by naseha on 15th Sep 2001. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Stringed Doll

    I opened my eyes to find

    A big wide stage

    On which was I free from all binds

    Like a joyous flight of birds

    I did move here and there,

    Sans any eye of any herd

    Slowly did I find fragile, dyed in color of bone,

    silken, near-invisible, emerging string

    From my body growing to fingers unknown.

    Was it growing or was it there?

    --- Invisible yet existent from the beginning

    Like leeches, soon they grew to ropes from hair

    Watching close, what did I see,

    Tearing my skin they had grown

    My arteries, vein, capillaries, suspending me

    When into the fingers unknown

    My own blood vessels did suspend me

    To whom and how do I mourn?

    by naseha on 13 July 2001. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Thirsty Lips

    A burning fluid flows around me

    Yet nowhere does my thirst find water

    Crawl I on my torn and tarrered knees

    On barren dead mountain seeking nectar

    Relieved that drowning hadn't submerged my voice

    I asked for water to my friends around me

    Blank, questioning and rediculing eyes shot back

    Unknown, unheard tongue answered, perhaps questioning me

    After days of strangling thrist, burning breath

    And years of search on fast melting rocks

    A small stream like fragile thread of hope held

    back ebbing life and I throlled to where birds flock

    For the kiss of life and shower of breathes

    Impatient hands and desperate lips could hardly wait

    My lips burns and throat chocked as molten lava I'd drunk

    The nectar in cups of my hands was fluid from Hell's gate

    Burning fluid around me turned nectar into lava

    With thirst on my lips in front of blue nectar stream I stand

    Touch of my lips turned the sparkling gushing

    Cool river of water to hot red molten sand

    by naseha on 24th May 2001. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Unspoken Words

    They fly from the prison of lips,

    unknown, unspoken and unseen.

    Across the heavens to distant lands,

    where its dreams can learn.

    Like glittering light of first star,

    waking up from slumber deep.

    They shine like drops of soft silky dew,

    kissing, petals fallen asleep.

    Like gurgling brook, dancing they,

    in the exotic wilderness.

    Whisper in the ears thousand words,

    like honey of tenderness.

    These feather light words made up of

    a smile and a drop of tear.

    Liberates and chains the soul with a dash

    of laughter and a pinch of fear.

    In myriad hues they are colored

    like clouds floating around.

    A touch of them liberates the self

    and to unfelt emotions they are bound.

  • Refreshing sure they are as the

    first drop of first rain.

    They heal up all, and tenderly pick up

    all known and unknown pain.

    They hold people tight in their

    gentle ecstatic grip.

    So much so that all gloom for

    some moments slips.

    Still they pierce the heart like dart

    their tips laden with hammocks

    But again they bring the fresh light in

    after breaking all doors and locks.

    by naseha on 23rd May 2000. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Unquenched Thirst

    A tear drop of eternal love

    frozen on face of time

    Like the mystic smile of Mona Lisa

    on the rock s alone

    whose charm can never be

    robbed by clime.

    With unquenched thirst on lips

    serene marble, silent doom

    Wake up from slumber deep by the

    gentle touch of moon

    And breathes to life after the

    setting of heavy gloom.

    Opens its arms to embrace

    all the hearts that truly love.

    To repine for lost Eros or walk along

    with bellamoure its

    myriad alley in hand with

    moon smiling above.

    Like Phoenix it burns every night

    in solatium of past.

    Repining for love trickles the

    ruddy drops through

    the heart of Cupid from Eternity

    to the Day Last.

    by naseha on 23rd May 2000. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Vulture Voice

    Like sharp claws creeping on glass walls

    I do hear loud screeching sharp voice

    That rips my ear, tears the skin

    That bruising, beating, deafening voice

    Blowing hard with acidic salt

    On my cheek and in my eyes -- the wailing voice

    With loud sea roaring in throat

    Waiting to melt down -- the mourning voice

    Stillness of death in barren sand

    Under cloak of silence, adust voice

    In futile search of water, searching

    In land of mirage -- very thirsty voice

    In lowest of low volume speaks

    Under the shadow of dagger --- the conspiring voice

    Watching, waiting with dangerous looks

    Scheming, plotting -- like sharp aduncated voice

    In ruins of silence where I stroll

    With deafening whispers echoes those voices

    Shadowing me with unheard footsteps

    Waiting to tear me apart those crawling voice

  • Under shrouds of darkness or in deserted plains

    No where can I hide from those fearsome voices

    In drops trickles down blood from my ears

    As deeper pierces those boiling red hot voice

    Burning my existence like wet damp leaves

    In a slow painful pace --- those smoldering voice

    Holding me tight in their grip, they feast on me

    Day and Night, each moment those vulture like voice

    by naseha on February 18, 2005. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Fallen

    I feel like screaming

    Till my throat bleed

    May be Your deaf ear could

    Then see voice that I speak.

    You are lucky God, that you are not human.

    Made up of matters unknown.

    Do you ever know, the pain the screams in flesh.

    Or white salty drop that burns in eyes?

    The anguish of walking through the dingy lanes,

    With stinking breath of decaying walking remains,

    Ears filled with their hollow smiles and laughter.

    And eyes full of scorn, lust, arrogance and revulsion.

    The shade grey enveloping from all facades,

    Not white to smile back and not black to hate.

    A violet fluid warm fluid with pieces of ice!

    Pulled between two angles of a triangle.

    What is in Your mind Lord, a vengeance?

    A vengeance to pain the ones that caused

    Expanse between You and your loved angel.

    Threw him out of heaven but not Your heart.

    In reflection of white, Adam walked with bliss in heart.

    In the darkest shade of black, fallen tossed in pain.

    To You his heart complained and You ran to your fallen one.

    Closed your gaze when he entered the heaven gate.

    Tainted with fallen touch Adam walked on moist earth.

    Drunk with portions white and black, the sweet nectar,

    That inebriated with burning smoothness of the color grey.

  • I look around and finds grey encompassing me all over.

    With black burning mass of flesh, I would have choosen to walk away.

    Shady look straight from shady eyes, expect me, disturbs it me the least,

    How should I expect warmth from the fallens own?

    What pains is the warmth from the eyes that hunt me.

    And hunting skim from the eyes that has warmth for me?

    Can I turn away from the black who are dressed in white,

    Or go them who are black still dressed in white?

    I close my eyes and find them all grey, where do I sleep?

    Is Your love for fallen so much that in flesh you mixed both.

    To tear apart the decaying mind and distorting soul?

    A chastisement for all Adam and Eves to cause Your separation.

    To see them in conflict between Him and the fallen?

    Sure the pain of flesh brings smile to lips of fallen,

    A vengeance that he loved but could not have taken alone.

    There is pain in Your heart for the walking flesh, still a fulfillment,

    You helped most loved rebellious one who is far away - fallen.

    I feel like screaming

    Till my throat bleed

    May be Your deaf ear could

    Then see voice that I speak.

    by naseha on February 23, 2005. naseha, All rights reserved

    After 2 years I have written something.

    Message to God: God forgive me. I do not mean to hurt You. At times I feel too sad, felt like throwing

    poison out. Who else but You would understand I am not bad at heart. Don't want to keep pain or poison

    locked in for long. After lava flow the soil becomes fertile.

  • Dim December

    The night is foggy, heaviness of December in air.

    Deserted street, dimly burning lamps ....

    So different from the world I saw just few minutes ago.

    Few hours ago life was moving fast.

    Under the golden rays of sinking sun,

    Fast to get to the warmth of cozy home.

    Soon darkness fell and phantoms walked in streets.

    Covered in thick blanket of icy sheet

    I was alone in a speeding vehicle....

    Cutting the darkness where an inch before is tar,

    Moving ahead in freezing night, with air

    Killing, crushing the bones, piercing the skin.

    Wintry finger squeeze the air out from lungs,

    Heart cries in wild apprehensive pain,

    Tears float from eyes as mouth is open wide...

    Dimly distant horizon, winter as companion

    Pain is the quite poetry sung in lyrics of air,

    And I dance as a quivering leaf on dusty foggy winter night.

    by naseha on March 4, 2005. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Death of an Elf

    Fragrant tulips and roses laden with dust filled my breath,

    Shards of broken glassy dreams swirled in my watery eyes.

    Drums and cannons boomed raging fire in my melting ears,

    Blizzard of cold icy thoughts ran as blood clod my skies.

    Frail elves, dangling steps, blurry vision a borrowed breath or two

    Moans floated on lips of elves like mournful pluck on strained harp

    Bravely as he could, tried to stop the silver blood oozing life from body

    The thirsty red sand was gulping away live from his claws sharp

    On horizon floated a fairy or two, afraid to descend down

    On hard boiling raving war field where he just breathe his last

    Two drops of marbles flowed from eyes as a tribute to the fighter

    As they watched the raven world full with dead and death cast

    In one death cast was Lucifer, frozen not dead,

    Stiffed in his green slimy blood ready to be woken

    Frozen curse on lips, eyes parted wide clutching to

    Elfs dagger, pierced in his heart and in two broken

    Dusty death danced away, in glory was Lucifer smiling

    Elves, fairies, men, all.all were falling under the slimy blade

    War that was on since centuries was coming to an end

    Blood of slain evil, stuck them to ground till their lives were laid

    Bravery was lost, even the victors were loosing life

    No escape, no victory, Lucifer was wining and death was on

    Words of dire prophesy ran in ears of our tired fighting Elf

    Warm silver if run into the heart of green will he be gone

  • The world around him stopped, numbers had fallen short of deads

    With each slain Lucifer, an elf was gone and again did Lucifer rise

    Generation have risen and fallen but the war continued

    Never did the elves give up nor could they wave their flag in skies

    Pulled out a dagger, presented to him by his love, cleaned it

    And with smile for his love, to her opened his hearts cone

    With failing breath dipped it in his warm silvery blood

    Called out the stunned Lucifer and in his heart dipped his own

    A martyr laid the elf, the war ended and Lucifer was gone

    He was locked with dagger of purity and good in his heart

    Eternal as he is blessed by Him, waits, Frozen in time

    He waits for some one to remove dagger from his stone heart

    In my heart I often see the flight going on and on

    Why has the Elf need to die to kill the Lucifer?

    Why cant he rise again? Why in death too Lucifer kills?

    And why the dagger is always pulled out again of Lucifer?

    by naseha on February 7, 2008. naseha, All rights reserved

    Every day and night I do see death of an Elf....in office, on streets, at home....everywhere...sometimes even

    in my heart.

    I started writing this poem with its end in my mind. I never realized that this would be true words of

    prophesy for me. On 6th the doomsday for me (for some reason I cannot state here), I completed this

    poem.

  • Burning Desire

    All the passing years, fan the fire,

    Burning in my heart is a raging desire.

    Each breath I take burns me deep

    Each day, each night - awake or asleep.

    Of glory and fame have my share

    A bit of sky bright and fair.

    To walk the path walked by none,

    To shine like candle if not like Sun.

    To have a voice of my own

    A place in this world if not a throne.

    Moments fan a raging desire,

    Of glory, have my share

    Bit of sky bright, fair.

    by naseha on July 14, 2009. naseha, All rights reserved

    There are many more verses in between but this is closest to my life.

  • The Scream

    For Once, for once

    Give me a night's sleep

    Let my young but weary bones

    Feel the rustle of silkk

    For once let my soul feel

    Smile on lips without any dread

    For once let my eyes not see

    Pain in the mirror of my mind

    Under the curse, it seems I carry

    This burden of life and love

    For once let me feel the love

    Without the salt of pain

    My heart yearns to burst

    My feet can no longer walk

    My shoulders are bruised

    My eyes have turned stone

    I wish I could just like the yoke

    I wish for once I am a spirit again

    Im the lightness of eternity would I dissolve

    by naseha on July 16, 2009. naseha, All rights reserved

    I know it is not a poem but wrote what I felt

  • The Promise

    In the burning and scorching sand

    At a distance, I saw a cool spring

    My soul lifted with joy and in heart

    A thousand harps did in desire sing.

    I turned and looked from my path

    The destination was too far,

    My frail body was crumbling in,

    The thirst was too strong to mar.

    Stop commanded a voice in my mind

    Dont turn away from the known way

    I stopped, my journey was hard and

    The fresh spring was little away.

    I stopped with frozen salt in my eyes

    I turned back, my lips in pain revolting

    Come to me, carried on wings of cool moist air

    I heard a voice so soothing

    Come to me, for I know you are tired

    The refreshing voice in dry hot sun said

    Your heart longs to be heard!

    Its pain is as heavy as sack of lead

    Let your stony eyes feel the freshness and

    Tickle of feather like dreams

    Let me sock your blood tasting lips

    Of yours to wipe out all traces of screams

    I stood there, unable to move

    Of these two what to choose?

    And no, said the voice There is

  • No conflict nothing to choose!

    Come to me; let my breath lift your sprit

    Let my touch quench your fire

    Let me soothe every should of yours

    Then take me along in your journey dire

    I wish not to stop you

    But to fill you with zeal

    Carry you faster to your destination

    And to kiss your wounds that they heal

    I turned towards the spring

    Shiny, cool glimmering with life

    I smiled and walked towards it

    Like under a spell bees make it to hive

    I walked and walked my eyes fixed

    Smile on lips and promise in ears

    After long I would open my heart

    And let go the frozen tears

    Stop, again a voice begged

    Stop before it is too late.

    You are walking away

    No where in sight is the gate

    I turned again I had walked far

    No where could I see my trail

    My heart caught my breath

    In barren land would I fail?

    No, said the sweet voice

    You are not lost, walk to me a little more

    Touch me and let your

    Mind and body in sky soar

  • On flight of wingless air

    Would I carry you there!

    Refreshed, glowing and happy

    Ill carry your, love with care.

    I lit up my trust and

    Drove way the little fear

    I would walk back well in time

    Just a few steps, spring is near!

    I touched the cool water

    Let my soul soak in as well

    Opened my heart, removed the drapes

    For once, I had broken my shell

    Pink was giving to the dark

    Fire in horizon was cooling fast

    I had to return, to my path

    To be back on my track at last

    The spring I was with was nowhere

    The freshness in my heart was a pain

    No voice could escape my lips

    My soul it seemed was slain

    I am sorry, the enchanted voice spoke

    I am weak and nowhere can I go

    The sun is gone and so is my strength

    I am dying every minute-the fire goes low

    Of promises made-what happened to them?

    You promise me that youll come back

    A sad smile rang though I am a mirage

    Never was I there, Never could I be there

  • There is only sand in your water sack.

    Of pain vanishing, of my lips

    Drenched in cool freshness?

    I am an illusion though I love you

    Pray dont get me wrong

    It is not my selfishness.

    Though it pains and breaks my heart

    I am a mirage to lure is my nature

    Though I wish to deceive none

    Deceits sadly is my only signature

    I too am bonded by forces

    Cannot break this chain

    In shackles of guilt I live

    Only me whos ware of this pain

    The illusion around me vanished

    As the last ray of Sun died

    Skin bleeding, sand in mouth and body

    In some unknown corner would I hide

    The spell was broken and so was my soul

    In barren land, I crumbled down

    I had lost all that was mine and

    In return wore a nailed crown

    Another path had opened

    Though the gate I had left had gone

    Rough hard stony path called

    I had to start then and not at dawn!

    My pack weighed so heavy

    Was it the weight of sand or lost path?

    One thing I was sure of with tears

  • Mirage would be watching me from Suns bath

    My path now looks longer and tougher

    With thousand times increased load

    Every step kills me but for a moment

    I cant sit for a breath or unload

    I know not if seeking mirage was a sin

    That I am cursed to suffer till the end

    My innocent heart easily trusted

    For my virtues to living hell was I sent

    I know not when the curse will be lifted

    I know not when would I be able to sleep?

    Still I wait for You, the Unknown Force

    To lift me from this darkness deep!

    by naseha on July 16, 2009. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Silver Lining

    A thorn pierced in the heart

    Thorn Bird sings for long

    Blood trickles down the stem

    As she sings her last song

    Unseen hands play music

    For the song born in pain

    From the womb of death emerges

    A song of life an fain

    As after darkness of storm is over

    World is dressed in celestial light

    On the still mirror of lakes

    Moonbeams dances with delight

    Tears of a million stars

    Form a pearl in ocean deep

    Gushing fountain of joy is found

    Burried under the Sorrows' heap

    Her pain floats in air to "Nargis"

    Opening hearts to love and care

    Her last breaths blossoms the rare

    Flower, found in only rocks - bare.

    by naseha on July 18, 2009. naseha, All rights reserved

    Written in 2000 and last stanza is added today July 18, 2009

  • Glorious Death

    All through the day - 7th November.

    With tears in eyes the Sun remembered.

    Years ago, on the same day he had opened his eyes

    None knew then, he would be listed as glorious in Skies

    Now the stars burn in the depth of the night sky

    Darkness hangs from the bough of trees high

    Gusty winds sweep down the lane quiet

    In a corner is a fort deserted in sight

    A shadowy rider emerges from the dust cloud

    Carrying a sword with face covered in shroud

    He halted and swung open the massive door

    Life returned with the King to the fort once more

    Candles and disappeared torches once again did glow

    On beds of dried fountains, water began to flow

    The exiled king returned back to his native land

    To keep his promise to the fort of Red sand

    A King denied of 2 yards to rest beside bones of his father

    Every night return to kiss the dust, he loved as his mother

    by naseha on July 18, 2009. naseha, All rights reserved

    During Indis's first war of Independence, "Bahadur Shah Zafar" (age around 80) the last Mogul Emperor

    lost. He was jailed in Burma. I requested that he should be buried in India - Delhi. But it was denied. His

    body was buried in Burma. Could they chain his soul? A tribute to this last king of Delhi.

  • Companion

    After a long day when my eyes can no longer look at the sun,

    When I need a shroud to cover me, for I no longer want light

    When in darkness I want to submerge and dissolve in null void

    There I find him, smiling to me from the dark horizon

    He covers my watery eyes from all harsh light, and envelops me in

    Soothing calm smiling light, making sure I do not dissolve in void

    Showering trillion and trillions of sparking wishes and hopes, making sure

    That I am relaxed and ready for the day for my journey to other horizon

    by naseha on July 26, 2009. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Dark Angel

    Oh God, the sky is dark with my tears.

    I feel venomous coil strike my worst fears.

    I feel so lonely, like a baby lost in wood.

    Please take me once again under your hood.

    My pain bitters my tongue; I seek answer.

    Why was I cast away like lump of cancer?

    Take me to your arms, I have been neglected enough.

    For centuries, I have walked alone on the paths rough.

    I know deep in your heart, you too long for me.

    You cry in depths of pain when forsaken you see me.

    For a moment, I feel like throwing the burden of false sin.

    And again bask in the glory of love with my angel kin.

    I can hear you voice calling me to come out from void,

    Calling me to come out of dark depths of abysses hyoid.

    I know this can never be done.

    From my duties I can never run.

    I have seen you create night to show the freshness of day

    Torrential rains to appreciate the warmth of Suns ray

    I have seen you toil to make the balance of Worlds right.

    I have seen you tender feeble seed and nurture Mountains might.

    For the sweetness of water is forgotten in absence of thirst.

    You love and mercy not be remembered in absence of painful burst.

  • Your child has taken up this curse to show the world of your goodness.

    With smile on my lips, every moment I have sung of your greatness.

    You servant, your angel was never boastful and nor full with pride.

    You and only know the pain which he in his heart hides

    My love for you is beyond my pain.

    It transcends every border, visage or frame

    But to the world a dark side is to be shown, so your light can be seen.

    For all to feel bliss of your mercy, I need to be both dirty and mean.

    by naseha on December 29, 2009. naseha, All rights reserved

  • The Choice

    And I thought I would die....

    I stood there at horizon looking

    At my loves - no way could I leave morn

    Leaving dusk would take my breath away

    I would die as no way could I choose...

    With blank eyes, troubled soul, I waited

    The Golden Voice gave me all my strength

    The husky one held my hand when I cried

    Of two banks of the river, I wished

    I could have been a bridge, but a boat

    I what I am, tired and drifting

    Would need to choose a side soon

    War was on between heart and mind

    I needed one and was needed by one

    Gifted land with laughter, spring and care

    And unknown mysterious land of love and pain

    Letting my warm breaths writhe and die

    I let the sunny oar go, held to the dark one

    Wishing my cold body bring some warmth

    In the dark cold land of love, guilt and pain

    Wishing with my last sunny breath

    In dead, may my floating body find

    A curve too narrow and becomes a bridge

    Between the ones I love, care, need and want

    My death would become my life again,

    In realms of death, would I find life again

  • Else I still walk with cold breath tending this land

    Of love and pain that cares for me till sun shines on me again

    by naseha on October 13, 2010. naseha, All rights reserved

    I think I just needed to open my heart and tell the truth

  • Faraway place

    Lets run away to faraway place

    Where day ends in purple hue

    Night breathes in warm whisper

    And Morn peeps in through dew

    Entangling the souls, lets walk to the plane

    Where Brook fills up the silence of lips

    Sunshine drizzles on the stretch of minds

    And rain glides on blooming flowers tips

    In mellow silence, with eyes close we trifle

    On the panes of wet grass and melting sleet

    Under the winter sky, soaring on night gale

    On the last skyline, can hear passion tweet

    Let fiery eyes meet as we hold our hands

    Losing ourselves in time to find us all again

    In tip and toes we escape to our faraway place

    Beyond the boundaries of mounts and plains

    by naseha on October 15, 2010. naseha, All rights reserved

  • When Moments Live

    I

    Moments in which moments live

    Walking down the Times lane

    In the zombie land of broken ones

    To the silvery patch of the ones sane

    Hold my breath, keep my eyes open,

    Drift past the cliff of senses and sanity

    Open my sense to freedom of spirits

    In twilight island of hope and liberty

    Walking in the maze of forms n voice

    My moments live, unlived drops of time

    Feeling the eternity in a breath

    Ears filled with starry climes

    II

    Dont wake me from this wakeful dream

    Let not my sense ever sleep

    Awaked I wander in woods of lunacy

    Where sensibility runs deep

    Let me not see of the divided world, of greed,

    And deceit, usurper, and cries of humanity

    Let my spirit soar beyond the want,

    In the light of darkness, in mist of tranquility

    No more touch of the world real I feel

    Chimerical moments of eternity, I taste

    In living moments I live, I die, I bond, I liberate

    As sand in hourglass runs upwards and down in haste

  • by naseha on August 25, 2011. naseha, All rights reserved

    I really dont know what I am referring too. .. everything came like free flowing stream of images. May be

    my subconscious mind was writing it... All I knew, when I woke up was I had to write the images

    somehow, somewhere

    Life - Protectors

    No will to live, afraid to die

    Life continues to drag on.

    I wish, I could say - happiness

    once know is now gone.

    The well I dig caves in the moment

    A drop of water touches my lips

    For the next sip, again from the start

    I dig a well, till, I drink and luck flips

    For 30 long years, I lived in illusion,

    Trusting, waiting - now no more

    With eyes closed, I lived amidst tempest,

    While standing on the dry shore.

    The selfless love was dejection, expectation,

    Humiliation, jealousy and apathy in disguise

    In garb of truth, the seller of rosy dreams,

    Showered me in the torrents of lies.

    Yet I lived on, in trance of protective arms,

    Holding me safe from every eye and hand vile

    The arm was a phantasm, disappeared in the

    First light of Sun in some moldy caves aisle.

  • I wandered clutching to the hope beyond any reason,

    Believing in the fear instilled in my tender, frail heart

    Little by little the poison of fear was mixed in my blood

    Till flutter of a butterfly wings would give me a start.

    I could breathe only behind the bars, wings clipped

    Living in my cocoon, my sanctuary. A little by little

    My limbs were broken, followed by groveling spine

    Filled with false dreams, ambitions, and illusions brittle

    Happily in pranced in the hollow scoop choosing to ignore

    All the voices that warned me, brought me a window to the world

    Was told, fire burned deep, blinding eyes, sulling the soul

    Taste of the blue sky melting in my mouth, would have my blood curled

    I took the friends to be the ones with knives, I had them, my protector

    And so I thought, I needed no one, my world was perfect complete

    Time passed, at times the act slipped, the radiance of painted world

    Faded a little, confusing me with rusty blood stain of apathy and cheat

    Gathering shreds of courage for months, years, once for once did I ask

    A rightful place, a pound of love pure and true, a heart that understood

    My world snatched away, semblance torn, ripped down to bare

    From tower of Rapunzel, was I thrown out in street misunderstood

    No will to live, afraid to die

    Life continues to drag on.

    I wish, I could say - happiness

    once know is now gone.

    by naseha on September 19, 2011. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Breathe another Day

    Every morn light burns my dreams,

    They rise again, In the chill of pale moon ray

    Like Phoenix, from ashes they breathe

    Give me a sigh enough to breathe another day

    by naseha on October 6, 2011. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Goes On ....

    Again the life goes on,

    The battles yet to fight -

    The open wounds to tend ....

    On the horizon of hope,

    Red and blue merge,

    To moist lips colors they lend...

    Pull on the coat, walk on

    Sky is heavy, dark and weepy

    Put a smile on my lips ....

    Warmth of love from faraway land,

    Keep me warm in desolated

    Waste ice as the mercury dips ....

    by naseha on January 1, 2012. naseha, All rights reserved

    This is the story of a soldier who is in trenches, his friends have fallen, the battle is over, enemies have

    left - he is in icy barren land alone.... no habitant or life form in sight, he is alone in cold lifeless land....

  • Am Here

    I ride on the spirited waves alone

    Floating on the wings of air

    Feeling the drop of rainbow

    running down my eyes without care

    The frozen ocean whispers tales

    of countless nights and days

    The blazing sands sing opening

    their heart in lyrical ways

    Stars are but dust on which

    for eternity I endlessly tread

    Within my eyes, I hold the void on whose

    speck, the universe is spread

    I am an illusion, far greater for any to see

    I smile, when they say, they control me

    Death, Devastation and Darkness

    are all in me and so is Pain

    Hope, Creations and Light make me,

    My touch removes all Bane

    I am free, hold my hand, accept me in your heart

    and be as free as you can be

    Come to me, open your eyes, I am your thoughts

    There are no secrets between you and me

  • by naseha on June 10, 2012. naseha, All rights reserved

    We always divide pain as physical and mental. There are all the same. The worst pain can be inflicted by

    chained thoughts. Have seen this so often. This might not be fully in sync with the contest. For me this is

    also a disability and irony is 90% of the population suffers from it, without realizing it. I wanted to let as

    many people to know the pain chained thoughts can create and the way out is only to accept it and free it.

    Sorry if it is not what you are looking for.

  • Nostalgic about future

    Laying on green dew ridden grass

    Awake under the starlit night

    Breathing the barks of trees

    Listening to the distant brooks

    Feeling Shelley in hearts of heart

    Tasting the eternity in every moment

    by naseha on June 18, 2012. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Lost Found

    So many impressions, drop like shower of rain

    As I sit and watch them from the window pane

    One drop glistering like a rainbow and another

    Dark as shadow, some heavy so light as feather

    I run out to hold the falling drops on the land so green

    Drops touch me, I close my eyes, loose myself to the serene

    Drop hold me fast, take me to a journey across smile and tear

    From the land of mirth to the deep dungeons of dark fear

    I feel the voices again, rubbing against my skin

    I could breathe the words long gone in heart within

    In a moment, I live again the moments gone by

    Some happy and some that made me again cry

    I wanted to hold the moments, the moments took me

    In midst of swirling glimpse, clearly, I could see

    Lost in a silken labyrinth of future, present and past

    Time relives my emotions but in shades so vast

    by naseha on June 22, 2012. naseha, All rights reserved

    Don't know - just wanted to write, so many things, but felt lost in the universe of things I wanted to share.

    So, shared nothing. But was desperate to write to ease out the knot. So here it is - Lost Found.

  • Undead Dead

    Feeling so crushed, beneath the boulder of sky

    Air rips my heart, in desperation to break and fly

    My voice is drowned in the dunes of black sand

    On horizon, a blood smear knife, is it God's hand

    My sense revolt, my will crumbles, body fails all scopes

    Though the dark lanes, carrying the corpse of hopes

    Yes, I wear the crown, but the blood trickles down my head

    Why should I bear it all, the cross, the pain drenched in lead?

    by naseha on June 27, 2012. naseha, All rights reserved

    I wish I could have confided in someone or could have shed a tear. I have no such options. Lest, I can try

    to share something here ... hope strangers can understand what closer ones don't

  • Unknown Horizon Beckons

    I know not what my heart craves for

    Why all known streets seems so new

    The sky I look at calls me from a new horizon

    My days here seems to be a counted few

    The inky sky shows me a glimpses

    Of the world I never been

    The icy winds take me on the wings to

    The land I had never seen

    Why my heart rebels out,

    Why my place never belongs to me

    Why I feel belonged to unknown land

    which I never in dreams did see

    by naseha on August 8, 2012. naseha, All rights reserved

    This is a metaphor. Would like to know, if any of you has had a similar feeling. Or share with me what you

    think is this distant land

  • Lonely heart

    Lonely heart in lovely planet

    Travelling to places unknown

    Under the star lit canopy of dark

    Still searches for the breath known

    Jasmine laden air, heavy with sobs

    Fly past my stony eyes filled with ash

    In the brink of the horizon, in twilight of life n death, I stand

    Would I turn to life again or leave it all in a moment of rash

    by naseha on August 12, 2012. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Forgotten Memory

    Guess I am peter Pan,

    Forgotten all about Neverland

    But all knowing heat yearns for it,

    Like drop of rain on blazing sand.

    by naseha on September 17, 2012. naseha, All rights reserved

    Cant ... just can't express how drawn am I to something I don't know yet. Remembering the never visited

    land. Something calls me, know not what, but feel I am part of it, as I was a part of it.

  • The Rain

    Open up your heart, scream and roar

    You are my voice, you are me.

    Lash down the trembling plain,

    Cover and cloud up the mighty sea.

    Let not my silence, hold you anymore

    It soothes me, pour out your heart

    Not for revenge, not for pain, cry out

    Till the mountains roll and fall apart.

    Its my night tonight, tonight I would speak

    The dark inky sky, hide the show off stars

    I need not to cover dark, let the truth unfold

    Show the real us, hiding under face of ours

    Rain, rain hard, all night long, do not stop

    Wake the trees, from slumber deep

    Clap the bolts, flood the brown, yield not

    Till all bitterness, in sweet tears of your sweep

    by naseha on February 4, 2013. naseha, All rights reserved

    Well, did not turn up the way I wanted. Came up something completely different. Still, kindda liked it,

    anything that flows spontaneously has to be true. And truth is beautiful though at times, it might be scary.

  • Beaten Path

    Song on my lips, dust on my boots, and dark night around me I take a moment;

    A moment to look around as I travel the worlds unknown.

    My Arabian horse - Lester, smiles at me in the light on the lantern, we are lost

    again

    In the dense of the mossy thick forest, echoing with wings drone.

    The yellow parchment of my dog eared tanned leather bounded sweaty dairy;

    Which I so lovely call my logs, is eagerly waiting for my ink and quill

    The stars speak, the midnight has passed, I pack away the day,

    As I decrease the flame, from my mouth, see the creeping wet chill

    Lester is snoring; peaceful with the mossy air of forgotten foggy forest trail

    After a month and half in desolated the parched land of dust

    The spirit in me, forces me out of my cozy cottage filled with aroma of

    mushroom

    To take on the paths not known, under star, sun, or fog, walk I must

    Lester, my trench coat, my log, my quill as my companion, I travel to embrace

    The mist of the height, the thirst of stark, the lead of unseen brook

    The tame of terrain wild, the serenity of the rushing gale, warmth breath of trees

    Old, knotty, patchy, all safely, frozen for eternity, in pages of my book

    Off the beaten path, away from comfort of known souls, under the Canopus

    On creaking, dry mattress of a thousand yellow, green, and red

    Occasional ease of the stained bedding in a lonely Inn on a highway, lit by

    single lantern

    I give in to the insanity in me, to find, to seek, on virgin gravels to tread

    I close my eyes as I walk, to lose the known paths, in getting lost in terra

    incognita

    Only then can I chance upon inebriation of charting the chartless in rife

    Maybe with few silver coins in the pocket, no mansion to pass on, but richer by

    far

  • Lived a million lives with each unsung path, I chart in chronicles of my roving

    life

    by naseha on May 11, 2013. naseha, All rights reserved

    I am a big fan of old school of poem, depicting time and journey of travel in era of horse, pre electricity

    age, roadside inns ... Tried to recreate it ... Hope it takes us back to that age even for a second or two

  • Searching Peace

    Where will you go,

    The night is dark

    The Angels have fallen

    Sings no more the lark

    The swampy road breathes

    Of pungent sweat and heat

    The eyes searches for relief

    For moment within blood beat

    Hold on to the ever slipping life

    In moment of smile and despair

    Etch on the spirit to go on,

    On the very fabric of soul bare

    You wander, nomad in a desert for peace

    A head to bury your hearts deep

    Warm lips to pick up the hidden tears

    Locked up in your laughters keep

    I know not fighter, the end of this war

    Will you ever find peace or lose your away

    Unknown tongue will sing your tales

    In regime of the heart till end of day

    by naseha on July 19, 2013. naseha, All rights reserved

    Inspired by the character Dean Winchester from Supernatural. Loved that series and Dean. Heart goes out

    for him. Written this at the end of Season 8. Hope one day, Jensen and Supernatural team reads this.

  • Pain of Rubaisha

    Where are you, where do I seek you?

    Across the plains, lakes or island of clove?

    Wherever you are, you may be, near or far

    Let my voice reach you, my love.

    Without the sparkle from your eyes

    The world looks dark to me.

    Come, hold my hands, take me

    Across the mountain, desert and sea.

    Still cant believe you are not with me

    For your love in my heart still beats on

    Feeling of your breath lingers on my lips

    Like the fresh fragrance of new dawn.

    In my heart I know youll return

    That keeps me, my love, my life go on.

    Come on wind take call far and wide so

    That hell return from where he had gone.

    Wherever you are, you may be, near or far

    Let my voice reach you, my love

    Where-ever you are, there do I seek.

    Across mountains, or deserts, my love.

    by naseha on August 20, 2013. naseha, All rights reserved

    Ruabisha is a princess, who is in love with Arkush. But Arkush leaves her in midst of battle because his

    heart said no on grounds of principle. It is Rubaisha's pain which manifests in Arkush's Dreams. If this

    sounds good, then grab your copy today https://notionpress.com/read/rubaisha-1290987

  • Afraid Heart

    No will to live, afraid to die

    Life continues to drag on.

    I wish, I could say happiness

    once know is now gone.

    Know not a day, where tears not kissed

    my smile, burning to char my wounded soul.

    Longed for a day where I rise from slumber

    In midst of forest deep over a peaceful knoll

    I grew up in lonely world of illusions

    No friends, no companions I knew

    Locked in invisible ivory tower was I

    Kept blindfolded by loved few

    The selfless love was dejection, expectation,

    Humiliation, jealousy and apathy in disguise

    Push me down every moment to rise as hero

    Like shining bright angles in mine juvenile eyes.

    The well I dig caves in the moment

    A drop of water touches my lips

    For the next sip, again from the start

    I dig a well, till, I drink and luck flips

    A broken heart yearned for love,

    Heart to envelope me, and be mine

    My days became a dream and in bliss

    On me, sun of love and care did shine

    I held a heart, yet it was never all mine

    Showers of love I get, still a part remains aloof

    Stranger lives there deep in someone thoughts

  • And here I was waiting for my story to be a bouffe

    Every paid in tears for every smile

    Got cheated by life, in every turn

    Want to die, face away somewhere quite

    But still clutching to life, afraid of deaths spurn

    by naseha on February 13. naseha, All rights reserved

    I know it does not sound that good, and it is one of the poems I dont like. It is not convincing and does not

    have my style. Still I thought I had to write this. At least I needed to share something

  • Silent Lord

    Tattered soul, bleeding voice, dead life, I stand here, in front of you Lord

    Barren boiling sand, vultures circling, Screeching for a pound of me charred

    Dark red flesh fall from the decaying corpse of my in-satiate dreams

    Live cactus grow from the fraying crumbling, still crawling bones scarred

    Seeking a roof over my head, a hand to embrace me, and a heart to love me

    I wandered with bleeding feet, cracked hands, drooling lips, endlessly in life

    Here I am, standing bewildered in the end of world with unsolved questions

    Why is my life a story of abandonment, pain and wounds, bleeding in rife

    Helplessly alone, I wander to find refuge. Heart and lips in unison prayed for

    little love

    Words fell around me like burning brimstone from sky, curses echo from all

    around

    Each word bound me with an anchor that I drag all along, countless anchors

    pinning me

    Yet, to breathe I need to walk, every step I hope in dull coldness of pain my

    senses drown

    My throat tears from thirst, begging for a sip of my own blood or sweat

    The drop of tear that rolled down on my lips turned to flaming torrent of fire.

    Lord, You turned my life to living Tartarus, when Cronus I am not.

    Why do You give me a hope to live a day, just to break it the next day, Sire?

  • Illusive Heart

    Two decades have passed, I have become a stranger here,

    Still something treads on the dusty, foggy road of memories,

    Crumbling dry, neglected ferns, pushing through hanging

    Wilderness, walking to long forgotten door in state of reverie

    The gentle breeze on the river side, kissed with the touch of rain

    Is it just drizzle, or a long lost friends complaints for the missing years

    I feel whispers of days gone, I hear the shadows of people I love

    I see the conversations, some dewy pristine and some covered with grime

    A novel church stands. Gone is the century old desolated building, the tiring

    steep stair,

    No longer obscure bats and torpid pigeons on hearing our footsteps fly away in

    scorn

    Church bell still chimes in the old tongue, reliving some of my evenings of

    peaceful solitude

    Candles burns over mine, lighted decades ago on mossy cave where lush

    flowers adorned

    The mighty Gulmohour, the shy Champak, the knotty old man tree, all gone

    today,

    I still feel them, when a drop of tear, I shed for them who I could never say a

    good bye

    Why it seems their breath has touched me again when the gentle gale touches

    today

    As I walk down the unknown passage, I feel the old corridors as they were

    once, lofty and high

    When I opened the doors of my heart, some life has returned to those deserted

    ruins of past

    As long lost friend it held me in its arms, laughing, smiling, as if we were never

    apart

    Under the starlight night, threatened by distant thunder, it took me along as it

    traversed

  • Across time, through the passage of emotions to see the reflections of my

    illusive heart

    by naseha on March 3 2014. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Equal Eye

    Offering you the shards of my broken spine,

    Numb I stand in front of you.

    Dangling by frayed twine, my laughter, my life.

    Here I stand before you, trying to forget my questions

    Trying to look beyond me.

    I come here to you with a blatant confession.

    I wanted, I asked, my tears fell in your lap, every wish that was for me

    My tears, my sweat forced Your grace to be mine.

    Reluctantly they came, late and then slipped through my fingers

    For every smile that I borrowed from the Time, I gave a pound

    Of my flesh. I screamed, I cursed.

    Forgetting that I held for some time that which was never mine.

    Here I am, looking back at my follies, my happiness which for some

    Reflected as pride. I know not if my feet

    Crossed the invisible line dividing the world of achievement and ego.

    In attempt to put a smile on the lips of lives I touched, maybe

    I filled them with tears. I forgot that I was no creator

    My wish though noble, was cloaked in the invisible sheet called vain

    I may not realize, I may be wrong again. Again may be I am touched

    By green pride in some hidden corner of my heart

    Let my soul, know the truth, guide it to leave behind the shackles of want.

    Yes, I loved you like I loved none. May be it was but pure

    I wanted You in return. Every time I prayed, I asked

    Today, I want to purge the bonds of wants, desires and ambition.

    I stand here trying to stop asking, trying not to wait for your gaze to fall

  • On by bare body, and crumbling soul

    But to cut out all wishes of return gifts, all dreams of future, all sorrows of past

    I stand soaked in my own blood, trying to live for the heart beat and the breath

    That still reverberates in the hollow shell

    Savoring the smiling taste of that surrender, which results in honor or death

    I want to hold my heart which jumps in anticipation, weaving dreams of joy

    when every there is a knock on the door.

    Save it from crumbling as the drink slip before the touching my thirsty lips

    I dont want to be lifeless, but full of life but to live in serene calm of total

    submission to your will. Not giving up.

    But letting myself be lead without a doubt by You. I am blindfolded to see.

    To hold the eluding peace and calm of the breathing moment, as I walk

    Towards the destiny

    Embrace the contentment if my destination fades away or serenity of finding it

    I know the path is difficult and there would be thorns, and sharp stones slicing

    my feet, still I want to walk.

    I dont want that regret to follow me like my shadow that says, You did not

    try.

    by naseha on 23rd Feb 2015. naseha, All rights reserved

  • Wishing on a Falling Star

    To forget you for once in life

    Is my wish on a falling star

    Meet you walking down some

    Desolated, mossy roads bizarre

    To fall for your charm once again

    As you walk humming thoughtlessly

    To lose in the depth of your words

    To kiss you for the first time in rain

    To practice in front of mirror all that I had to say

    And to forget them seeing you walk in

    To dream about your lips on mine all day

    And to be too shy to tell you what you mean to me

    Waiting in my balcony waiting for the sun to sink low

    To see you with your friends, having a laugh

    Catching your eyes when the birthday candles you blow

    Knowing you were wishing for me

    Know you once again, love you again

    To meet you once again as a stranger

    To relive the story of love that is insane

    To lead another and another and yet another life with you.

    To forget you for once in life

    Is my wish on a falling star

    Meet you walking down some

    Desolated, mossy roads bizarre

    by naseha on 23rd May 2015. naseha, All rights reserved

  • I Opt for Curse

    Here I stand to be judged,

    Not a word would I speak in my defense

    My persecutor, should me my witness, My Jury,

    And my Judge, be Him who accused me

    If my Love is not enough, I opt for Curse of Hell

    But will love You in imperfect way I know, the way You created me

    For every rules that I broke, I followed my heart

    The same heart where You whisper sometime

    If that heart is so dark, filled with evil

    How can You live there, I sure did feel You

    Is submission is all You want?

    Is obedience greater than love?

    My heart does not agree to it. Had it been so,

    Resonating hymns of Angels, praying, carved in obedience

    Would have touched your heart, satisfied Your soul

    Yet, You looked for more. Carved me from Clay, Fire, & Water

    Sparkling tasteless water became sweeter but muddy

    The Fire that burned bright now glows with different hues

    You looked and smiled at the imperfection that You created

    Valued it over the perfect beings of submission and duty

    You created me with imperfection, my imperfections are me

    My submission is flawed, obedience has a mind of its own

    The only perfect imperfection I have is my heart that beats for You

    Each moment I breathe, I talk to You. I dont know what a prayer is

    Gave me wings, I want to soar the sky, taste the clouds, raindrop and sun

    I would fall at time and rise once again to feel the sky You have created

    Why do I need to live in a cage of rules that I do not understand, nor my heart

    does

  • In cage, I would be safe from the Eagles and Hawks, but I would taste the

    firmament

    May be my wings would be burnt in Sun, broken to pieces in tornado

    Still satisfied that I felt Your Love, touched Your Creation, Felt You in All of

    them

    Chain me no more to rules of obedience. Defiant, I am not

    But I follow whispers of my heart. A place where You live

    As imperfect as I am, my Love is all that I have

    Which I would keep offering You, that is my obedience

    If my Love is not enough, I opt for Curse of Hell

    But will love in the flawed way I know, the way You created me

    Sans all chains, sans all rules, sans all distance and formalities

    My love is wild, free, feeling You in me, and in every entity I see

    by naseha on 21st July 2015. naseha, All rights reserved