practitioner manual

Why Might I Want To Know About NLP? By Menachem Kasdan, Certified NLP Trainer

I

If you want to excel in any particular endeavor - or in many - as diverse as: developing communications or business skills, parenting or teaching skills, swimming, influencing others, being creative, cooking, negotiating, therapy skills, etc. - you would want to learn NLP. Why? Because NLP is the study of skill acquisition and mastery, how to identify, integrate, and apply to yourself and teach others, the skills applied by the experts in their field; how the experts themselves excel in what they do. How does N?LP do this? (And what do those letters "NLP" stand for?) Just like in all disciplines, NLP accomplishes its goals by being both an art and a science, an attitude and a technology. An art, because each individual brings his or her unique personality and style to what they do, and this can never be fully captured in words and techniques. A science because there are techniques, methods and procedures for discovering and for applying, the patterns and strategies used by the individuals who excel in their field. An attitude, because being curious and motivated to discover, implement and teach the structures of excellence is what drives the student/practitioner of NLP. Studying skill acquisition in this manner is called modeling. Modeling answers the question "how?" as opposed to a theory which answers the question "why?" And what a difference there is between the two! Just think of the different information you would get if you asked "why" a Nobel prize winnerwent about earning his distinction versus the information you would receive if you asked "how" he went about doing it. Only the second question and its answer would really teach you how to be more like him. Or, think of the difference between the answers you would get asking "why" the Wright brothers created the airplane versus "how" they did it. Based on this idea that a model teaches us how to perform successfully, another way for explaining what NLP is about, is to describe it as containing two parts: 1) a model of how to model human behaviors, and 2) a collection of the patterns (models) so far discovered. As a model of how to model, NLP is a system which trains an outsider how to discover the patterns of excellence in any field. As a collection of the patterns (models) so far discovered, NLP is also a library or directory of models of excellence.

For example, among the patterns NLP has discovered and catalogued are strategies for establishing instant rapport with almost anyone, quick - and permanent - (specific) phobia cures, public speaking skills, strategies to overcome difficulties in spelling, sales strategies, study skills, sharp-shooting, allergy relief, and many more. As noted above, if you can duplicate the strategies - the attitudes, behaviors, emotional states and communication skills - used by someone outstanding in business, parenting, teaching, swimming, influencing others, being creative, being kind and compassionate, negotiating, doing therapy, gourmet cooking, etc. you could begin to reproduce (or at least consistently approximate) the same outstanding results they so consistently produce. The NLP rule of thumb is: If someone can do it, you can also learn to do it. Thus, by using the approaches developed in NLP you would more quickly and more expertly master the field in which you want to excel and then naturally apply your learnings in your everyday life. How does NLP help you do this? (And what does NLP stand for?!)

II The underlying principle is that whether or not we succeed at any given task depends upon how we think and imagine we will do. Or, in more precise terms - which will shortly be explained - our success depends upon our subjective, internal representation of external reality. For example, remember some interesting event that you experienced within the last month. To do so will require that you imagine some pictures in your mind's-eye, that you "talk to yourself" about the event in your head, that you remember what it felt like, perhaps tasted and smelled as well. This memory in your head is an internal representation of a past external reality. However, we not only remember the past, we can also imagine future situations. In everyday language, we call this "planning". If the internal representation - our subjective "map of the world" - shows us how to succeed in the future, we will act accordingly. If we imagine failure, we will succeed at that too, because we will act externally according to our internal imagination. NLP therefore teaches us how to modify our internal "map" of reality so we can make our desired imagination occur. For example, the little child who imagines a little puppy as friendly, becomes happily excited and wants to play with it when he sees one, while an adult who imagines dogs as being aggressive, may actually run away when he sees the same little puppy. More than they are responding to the puppy "out there", they are reacting to their internal imagination, their internal "maps of reality". NLP claims that all of our thinking has a structure which can be modified in (reasonably) predictable ways. We think via internal pictures or, imageinations, sounds e.g. internal dialogues, and internal feelings. The particular contents of our internal pictures, sounds, feelings, etc. make up our map of the world.

As in the example of how different people respond to a little puppy by responding to their internal "maps" of "interactions with dogs", so too we respond directly to our internal "maps of the world" rather than directly to the outside world. By learning how an expert structures his internal thinking, and how he then acts upon them in the external world, we can imitate him. And, although we begin by imitating him, as we become more adept at the imitation, we begin to modify what we have learned so as to fit our unique personality,

who we are. Just as the expert does.

I I I NLP stands for Neuro-Linguistic Programming: "neuro" referring to the nervous system, through which all our experiences must be mediated, "linguistic" referring to language, both verbal and non-verbal, i.e. the different kinds of communications which our neurology must respond to, and "programming" referring to the human ability to organize knowledge and experiences into goal oriented plans or procedures (programs). We organize our programs by systematically communicating to ourselves and others. Since much of this occurs outside of our awareness, NLP studies both our conscious and unconscious ways of communicating and programming. The term "programming" also indicates that both our consciously re-producible behaviors as well as many of our habitual (usually unconscious) ones, have been "programmed" into our neurology, i.e. they have been learned, and therefore, most importantly, are modifiable. Its jawbreaker of a name notwithstanding, trainings in Neuro-Linguistic Programming are fundamentally simple, natural, and "user-friendly". You will be thoroughly enjoying yourself in an NLP training. (Humor is a serious NLP learning tool!) Almost immediately participants report using their learnings to improve themselves, their human relationships, and their professional effectiveness.

©Menachem Kasdan, Director Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 2001.

N L P A X I O M S F O R E X C E L L E N C E

1. A Problem is the gap between the Present State - what you have, & your Desired Outcome State - what you want.

2. A Solution is obtained by identifying & implementing the resources which move you from PS to DS, from where you are to where you want to be.

3. Every Problem has a Solution.

4. Experience has structure. We organize our thoughts, feelings, memories and behaviors in certain ways so that we obtain consciously and unconsciously desired outcomes. This internal organization of experience is our Map of the World. If we change the structure of our experience, our experience will automatically change. And we can change how we think, feel and behave.

5. We learn about our environment via our five senses. We then process this information via internal sensory representations (pictures, sounds, feelings etc.) The organization of our internal pictures, sounds, feelings, etc. make up our Map of the World. We communicate aspects of this map - our feelings, thoughts etc. - to others through our physiology (body language), voice tone & use of language.

6. The Map is not the Territory. The way we "are" in the world, is an expression of how we respond to our maps of the world. We respond to them, rather than directly to the world. It is easier to update our Maps than to change the world.

6. Every person is unique because of their internal Map which influences how he/she gathers information, processes and expresses it, as well as what s/he gathers, processes and expresses.

7. Distinguish between Person & Behavior. In interacting with others, respect the person and his/her values & model of the world. If criticism is appropriate, direct it to the behavior, not the person.

8. Accept experiences as information. Rather than judge - which is an imposition of your map upon someone else's - be aware that what has happened is your meeting up with another, different map of reality. Corollary: There is no (permanent) failure, only feedback. Life is ongoing learning. And since you can learn from a "mistake", it is not really a "failure". It is valuable information which when properly utilized will guide your next steps in coming closer to fulfilling your goals.

9. Every human being is endowed with all the resources s/he needs to accomplish his/her goals. Where needed those resources may be obtained from her/his surroundings. Corollary: If someone else can do it - you can also learn to do it.

10. Our beliefs motivate us. They also limit us. If you think you can (or if you think you cannot) you'll be right. Change a limiting attitude and you will expand

the scope of your outcomes. Enhance desired attitudes and enjoy enriched outcomes.

11. Everyone makes the best possible choice available to them at the time.

12. Behind every behavior - yours and other's - is a positive intention. Corollary: Every behavior is or was useful, adaptive and valuable in some context. Corollary: Rather than condoning or condemning a person's behavior, we can add newer and more effective behaviors which will satisfy the same intent.

13. You cannot NOT communicate.

14. The meaning of a communication is its effect, the response it elicits, the outcome it obtains; not the intention of the communicator. Corollary: You get the response you elicit.

15. The definition of Resistance is "lack of flexibility on the part of the programmer/communicator". If you meet "resistance" it means you have not yet crafted your communication so that it can be processed in your partner's map in the way you would like it to be processed.

16. "Power" is the ability to produce intended results. It is a function of the number of options and choices you have, and the flexibility you use to implement them appropriately. It is not "control over". It is the ability to be as you wish in any given situation.

17. The person with the most flexibility in thinking & behaving has the best chance of succeeding and will be the catalyst for change in the system.

18. There is always another way to accomplish what you want.

19. If you keep doing what you've done before, you'll keep getting the same outcomes you got before. Corollary: If what you've done till now hasn't worked - try something - anything - else.

20. Mind & body, conscious & unconscious thoughts, feelings & behaviors are all interrelated. Impact upon one and you'll affect the others.

21. The highest quality information is behavioral. Pay attention to what people DO, not what they SAY they do.

©Menachem Kasdan, Director Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 1999

Communication is the expression of our thoughts. What are thoughts? Clearly, everyone knows that thinking occurs inside themselves and is not available to others awareness. Thus one helpful way of thinking about thinking is that we are using our senses internally.

Competence = keep operating towards goal regardless of context. Keep your outcome constant, but vary your behavior so as to achieve it. You can't set a goal without limiting possibilities

PHYSIOLOGY of EXCELLENCE 1. P asks S to pick a recurring "stuck" state and to re-enter it. ["See what you saw, hear what you heard, feel what you felt, act and talk as you did etc.."]. 2. When S confirms and P can see that S is in the stuck state, P describes in sensory specific language what s/he sees, and asks S to "memorize" it. Note: Do not allow S to remain in this state longer than absolutely necessary to calibrate. 3. Break state. 4. Test that S can return to stuck-state physiology at will. Break state. Do this twice. Note: If unsuccessful, P gives correcting feedback till S does succeed. 5. P asks S to identify a resource state they would rather have in that situation and to access it. Repeat steps 1-4 for the resource state. 6. P guides S through the following sequence:

Neg Pos Neutral

P asks S to a. re-access stuck state by getting into unresourceful physiology, and

as soon as they begin to feel the stuck feeling, b. immediately move into resourceful physiology c. P observes physiological shifts and makes sure they correspond to

earlier observations. Break state

Do this three times. Note: Allow S to linger in and enjoy the positive state before guiding him/her out of it into neutral state. 7. Test/Future Pace. Ask S about the (former) stuck state and notice that

they begin to re-access that physiology but never quite finish because they shoot through to the positive state physiology without realizing it.

9. Practice several times daily for 2-3 days. ©Menachem Kasdan, Director Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 2001

Well-Formedness Conditions for

Outcome Frame

SPECIFIC OUTCOME STATED IN POSITIVES WHERE DIRECTION IS IN YOUR CONTROL i.e. INITIATED AND MAINTAINED BY YOU, WITH SENSORY DATA REALITY CHECK, i.e. WHAT YOU WILL SEE/HEAR/FEEL, AND WHICH IS CONGRUENT AND ECOLOGICAL

CREATING EXCELLENCE THRU SENSORY ACCUITY & BEHAVIORAL FLEXIBILITY

LANGUAGE IS A MAP OF A MAP

EYE ACCESSING CUES

PHOTOGRAPHERS MOVIEMAKERS V ARCHITECTS DESIGNERS Vc RADIOLOGISTS Vr SPORTS/ATHLETES DANCERS Kproprioceptive SURGEONS SCULPTORS MASSAGE- THERAPISTS Ktactile ADDICTION Kr COMPOSERS A

MUSIC Actonal

POET Ad MUSICIANS Artonal

© Menachem Kasdan, Director Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 2001.

Adi

Ar

Vr Vc

Ac

K

LEAD SYSTEM REFERENCE SYSTEM PRIMARY SYSTEM SYNESTHESIA TRANS-DERIVATIONAL SEARCH

Rapport (PACING)

"When people are like each other, they like each other"

Introducing NLP, p. 20.

Rapport = a process (not a state!) of acknowledging (=a way of saying: ”Hi there! Hello”) the other’s unconscious, i.e. their total self/communication = a process (not a state!) of creat ing , mainta ining

& enhancing Responsiveness in o thers

= the last step before attempting to influence other; ALWAYS GO BACK TO !

= creating a receptive state in other = a state of uncritical acceptance of your communication

= meeting your "opposite" in "sameness"; meeting him at his model of the world and creating conscious & unconscious affinity between the two of you = making yourself into a bio-feedback instrument vis-a- vis the other

= A situation in which you have 1. Attention (from others)

2. As an expert, i.e. one whose communication is important for them

Note: a. Because they will appreciate your interaction with the whole of who they are b. Because they experience themselves in you 3. As one who is non-judgmental. They will feel "understood without being judged"

Advantages: 1. Gets you attention from others 2. Allows you to better understand their model of the world

3. Makes it easier for them to accept your communication

Limitations to Using these Skills: 1. Your ability to notice others' behavioral patterns (gestures, voice characteristics, language patterns etc.)

2. Your skill at mirroring/matching the above 3. Your desire to do the above

Corollary: Know how to break rapport

Pacing Skills for Establishing Rapport

1. Mirroring a.Physiology

b. Voice Tonality

2. Matching

3. Cross-Mirroring

4. Linguistic Mirroring/Pacing: a. Backtracking b. Rep System Predicates c. Criteria d. Accepting objections [agreement frame]

(But -> And) 5. Meta-Programs

backtracking = review, for the other's evaluation, what they (&/or you) have communicated, verbally & non-verbally a. Establishes agreement b. Shows awareness of other's positions & therefore interest in them c. Maintains momentum d. Prevents misunderstandings e. Helps guide your next communication input/output Note #1: When Backtracking, constantly calibrate the other's responses in order to know if & how to change your behaviors appropriately (= in accord with their responses & your desired outcome). Let their behavior direct yours - towards your outcome. Note #2: Mirroring gestures during a Backtrack will not risk breaking the other's state & your rapport with them, as much as it might while they are gesturing and you are (supposedly) "just" listening.

4. Sort by Other - Let their feelings, thoughts, values, beliefs (as you imagine them), & behaviors direct your understanding of them, & not your own feelings etc.

5. Helpful Pacing Hints (assorted) a. Indicate Appreciation of their ideas e.g. don't be judgmental. If you must - indicate agreement before disagreement, approval before disapproval e.g. use "and" instead of "but" b. Pace their emotional state e.g. first pace their depression before (attempting to lead by) recommending they "cheer up" c. Appropriately pace their (sub)culture e.g. clothes food language values (taboos)

c Menachem Kasdan, Director Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 1999

REPRESENTATIONAL SYSTEMS - PREDICATES

VISUAL AUDITORY KINESTHETIC UNSPECIFIED

APPEAR TALK FEEL UNDERSTAND PERSPECTIVE REPEAT BALANCE COMPREHEND

HORIZON HEAR HARD EVALUATE LANDSCAPE SAY TOUCH SIMPLIFY

CLEAR SEE

STORY DIALOGUE

GRASP HAPPY

THINK DISTINGUISH

FOCUS LECTURE TAKE CONSIDER VIEWPOINT LOUD SHOCKING REMEMBER

LIGHTENING DAWN MOVIE

ARGUE CRY

DENY

TRANQUILLITY DEPRESSION

QUICK

JUDGE CONTINUE RESPECT

COLOR DISPUTE LIFT BELIEVE LOOK

[NAME OF COLOR]

WORD SOUND

CHATTER

EXCITEMENT OVERTURN

DULL

AWARENESS COMMITMENT

IMPORTANT PICTURE WHISPER OPENNESS VALUE

FADE OBFUSCATE

PALE DECORATIVE

SING GIGGLE

WHIMPER CRITICIZE

DISLIKE ATTACK STOLID

TEMPERAMENTAL

MEANINGFUL PERFECT

PLANNING

HUE WARBLE ASSERTIVE OLFACTORY BRIGHT LIGHT

CAMERA

MUSIC BELCH NAME

MARCH SLEEP

COLLECT

FRAGRANT ODOR SMELL

DISAPPEAR PRETTY

{ MUSICAL } {INSTRUMENT}

TREMBLE SOFTEN

NOSY STINKER

INVISIBLE SOPRANO SKIP PERFUME OPAQUE AUDITORY LOVE FUMIGATE REVEAL RHYTHM FLUTTER

ENLIGHTEN VISUAL

SHRIEK TELEPHONE

REPLACE WORK

PHOTOGRAPH DAZZLE

CALL MOAN

ENERGIZE POWERFUL

GUSTATORY TASTE

BEAUTIFY SHADE

TRANSPARENT MICROSCOPE

BLIND GLASSES

SHOW

LAUGH ORATORY

LILT THUNDER

BOOM! SHOUT RUMOR

TRANSFER RUNNING

FLOAT SUPPORT ATTACK THRUST

TAP INTO

SALTY SOUR

SWEET HUNGRY

SATED DIGEST

BRILLIANT DEBATE PULSATE FLUORESCENT PROCLAMATION FEEL REFLECTION ANSWER IMPRESS


R e p S y s t e m E x e r c i s e

Examples

1. My future appears pretty bleak Match: Visual: When I look ahead everything seems black Translate: Auditory: When I try to tune into it, my future sounds cacophonous Kinesthetic: When I think of moving into the future, it seems so painful 2. She's a nervous wreck over this project! Match: Kinesthetic: She's twisted up in knots by this project! Translate: Visual: She's completely unfocused by this project! Auditory: This project is making a babbling idiot out of her! 3. It sounds promising Match: Auditory: What I hear has a good ring to it Translate: Visual: Looks real rosy Kinesthetic: It feels like it could be a perfect fit

Exercise

1. I feel unappreciated Match: Translate: Translate: 2. What a delicious idea! Match: Translate: Translate: 3. I keep asking myself: "How did I ever get into this?" Match: Translate: Translate: 4. I just can't imagine how he sees it Match: Translate: Translate: 5. We'll just have to pick up the pieces and start all over again Match: Translate: Translate: 6. Why do I feel like I'm banging my head against a stone wall? Match: Translate: Translate: 7. One more word out of him, and I'll scream Match: Translate: Translate: 8. Looking back, I can see he was right Match: Translate: Translate: 9. I'll stand by my intuition Match: Translate: Translate: 10. He must come through for us Match:

Translate: Translate: 11. You have to be the voice of reason here Match: Translate: Translate: 12. Make it colorful and attractive Match: Translate: Translate:


accessing sorts for their ucs thinking Predicates sorts for their cns thinking = Primary rep system Lead system determined by initial eye accessing Most Favored rep system = who I think I am "Congruency" in Rep systs means all 3 are same

more congruency -> more powerful our communication -> more empowering/influencing others overlap - natural intersection from most to next to least favored rep syst & talk ab wht things wd naturally have to be there & then cycle back again overlap - A TECHNIQUE FOR RETRIEVING PERSONAL RESOURCES & CREATING NEW EXPERIENCES FOR THE CLIENT. THE CLIENT'S CONSCIOUSNESS IS GUIDED FROM THE REP SYSTEM IT IS IN TO AWARENESS OF ANOTHER CHANNEL, USUALLY BY A GUIDED FANTASY. Stay in Rapport long enough to gain control over the other's behavior/influence their behavior. Remember: All communication is a series of agreements Only move beyond what your last agreement was by one step Introduce some new idea' suggestion or move only after having secured an agreement just before. If someone disagrees verbally, to get rapport, say "that's right. You disagree" and now you're back in rapport & agreement. Rov stuff Dawna Markova Conscious Sub-Conscious Unc V A K V K A A V K A K V K V A K A V Rep systems - adjectives adverbs & verbs I Meaning of communication is resp - MM twice II Pace & Lead MK keep them talking repeat their words ask lead them through till feeling state e.g what like about vacation? what's something fascinating? exciting? loving? meaningful? adventurous? Have you ever been in a trance state before.... right now? Calibrate their resps & reverse as needed.

III Rep system story - round robin IV A tells story, B matches pred in questioning, commenting. C checks off preferred, next, third, least used syst (dist Ad & At) V Overlap - Use A's preferred (from prev exercise) & walk through the remaining ones 1) Universal gen'l incl what has to be before BE ARTFULLY VAGUE 2) start from their prefered most comfortable to least 3) switch at natural intersection 4) calibrate & reverse if necessary Cycle 3x Switch positions VI M-MM-M physiology VII M-MM-M tonality

PRESUPPOSITIONS

Vs. Mind Reads

Presuppositions are what must be true if a sentence or behavior is to make sense. Presuppositions are implicit assumptions – beliefs – about reality or values. Although they are not explicitly stated, they are "stated" implicitly. A Mind-Read is a possible but not necessary understanding of the sentence/behavior They may or may not be true.. Mind-reads are usually said straight out, and are projections or interpretations of the listener/observer. A classic example is "Have you stopped beating your wife?" where the (most important) unspoken assumption is that you've been beating her till now. (It also presupposes that you are male, married and are capable of hitting.) A mind-read in this example would be "You hate your wife" or "You're obviously doing that to help her prepare to be an Olympic team boxer". Identify the presupposition by recognizing the unstated, hidden assumptions which MUST underly the stated position. When you bring a presupposition into the open you make its veracity negotiable and/or arguable or testable.

EXAMPLES

STATEMENT: When he returned to the arena, he received a standing ovation

. PRESUPPOSITIONS MIND-READ He was there, left and returned He had already performed in the arena here was an audience to receive him The audience had been sitting

There was an arena. The audience consisted of Spaniards There is access to the arena

STATEMENT: As you sit in this chair, you will go deeper into trance.

PRESUPPOSITIONS MIND-READ You are already in trance. The chair is not broken. You can go deeper. You’re too tired to stand You are sitting. You enjoy being in a trance. There is a chair.


PRESUPPOSITIONS WORKSHEET What presuppositions underly these sentences? 1. How do you succeed so well at failing? 2. When we finish this, we can get down to work. 3. For use by staff members. 4. I don't look forward to the visit of aliens from the planet Ogronex. 5. I'll never eat another vegetable again. 6. He'll work harder than Joe did. 7. I see that you're as thick as all the rest. 8. She's far more considerate than Sally was. 9. Bob! Come back home! 10. Who ate the flowers? 11. What did your goldfish say? 12. He makes me angry! 13. So up to this point you still haven’t figured out how you’ll succeed? 14. What do you plan to learn from all the positive effects of the mistakes you’re going to make in life?

From

The Humor Depot @ TheHumorDepot.com

Here are some actual label instructions on consumer products that may tell us

that we are doomed through stupidity

(On a Korean kitchen knife): Warning! Keep out of children. (On an American Airlines packet of nuts): Instructions – Open packet, eat nuts. (On the bottle of a UK milk drink): After opening, keep upright. (On a Sears hairdryer): Do not use while sleeping. (On a helmut mounted mirror used by cyclists): Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you. (On a hotel provided shower cap): Fits on one head. (On a string of Chinese made lights): For indoor or outdoor use only.


PREDICATE SYSTEMS TRANSLATIONS

UNSPECIFIED

Ignore

Be aware of what's

happening

Synchronize;

Cooperate

Good idea!

That gets me involved

I erred

Educates

VISUAL

Look the other way

Keep a sharp lookout

See eye to eye

Brilliant!

Shows me the way

I

hallucinated;

I was looking at an

illusion

Enlightens

AUDITORY

Turn a deaf ear

Tune into things;

Keep your ear to the

ground

Be in harmony; agree

Witty!

That speaks to

me

Barking up wrong

tree

Instructs

KINESTHETIC

Turn one's back on

Get on right

track

Meeting of the minds

That's sharp!

Tickles my fancy

I was heading in the wrong direction

Conveys; Gets the

point across

OLFACTORY GUSTATORY

Lose one's appetite

Pick up the

scent

Have similar tastes

Gets the juices flowing;

Delicious!

Makes my mouth water

It gave me a bitter taste

Food for thought; What to digest


Broker: So how does this investment portfolio look to you? Can you see how we've watched out for the star stocks? Potential Investor: Well... I don't know. I'm sort of uncomfortable with the risks we'll be taking. B: Ok, I think I see the problem. If I could show you that the way is clear on these particular stocks Iit appears to me you'll recognize that it's really OK. Have I clarified this? PI: Well, I really feel uneasy... I don't feel I'm getting my point across. It's like unbalanced. My sense is that it's top-heavy in hi-tech and not strong enuff in more standard stocks. B: OK. I think I see the picture. What if we looked at it from this perspective. Hi-tech has been dazzling over the past year while the outlook on those standard stocks seems to be pretty bleak. PI: Well... My gut intuition is that I should sleep on it before going forward if at all. B: OK. I think I can grasp what's disturbing you. What if we approached the issue from the standpoint of the professionals. The really strong impression that they give is that hi-tech is going to soar, while they're much less confident & even worried about the more standard stocks. Does this come to grips with the problem? PI: Well I certainly feel better now that you've put it that way. Let me sleep on it, but I think there will be a meeting of the minds here.

PRESUPPOSITIONS

"WHY DID YOU BRING THIS BOY TO ME?" (--> he's not YET grown up)

PSYCH LITANY OF OFFENCES "YOOU! SIT DOWN!" "HOW SURPRISED WILL YOU BE WHEN YOU NOTICE YOU'VE COMPLETELY CHANGED NEXT WEEK?" "I'LL BE VERY SURPRISED" "TAKE THIS BOY AWAY." (MK: It's a message to the "boy"! Take the "boy" away... and become a man!) ALWAYS THINK - & EXPRESS YOURSELF (?) - ON LEVEL OF PRESUPPOSITIONS.

PRESUPPOSITIONS HELPFUL AS: GUIDE TO OTHERS MAP OF THEIR WORLD

(ALWAYS) THINK OF THEM AS MEANS OF GUIDING THE OTHER INTO TRANCE

or, at least, some other state

WHAT UNDERLIES PRESUPPOSITIONS?

ANSWER: NOOTHING! IT'S BEYOND WORDS! & that level is ineffable

at best you describe it by gestures or pictures

I PRESUPPOSITIONS OF EXISTENCE THE CHAIR IS IN THE FRONT OF THE ROOM ---> THERE IS A BACK OF THE ROOM. = THE ROOM. = THE WORLD OF DUALITY IN ORDER TO BE "YES" IN A PERSON'S LIFE, THERE HAS TO BE A "NO".

II PRESUPPOSITIONS OF AWARENESS "NOTICE, PAY ATTENTION TO, SENSE, REALIZE, CONSIDER, THINK, CONTEMPLATE, FEEEEL, PERSON'S ATT BECS DIRECTED TO WHATEVER IS SAID AFTER THESE WORDS EVEN IF FORMULATED NEGATIVELY, AWARENESS DIR TO IT BEC AWARENESS AWARE OF EVEN WHAT IS INEFFABLE & INDESCRIBABLE LINGUISTICALLY EXCELLENT SIMULTANEOUS PACE & LEAD!!! BEC EVEN IF NOT AWARE TILL YOU MENTION IT, ONCE YOU DO, THESE WORDS FORCE AWARENESS e.g. you may not be aware of your hand resting on the chair

III PRESUPPOSITIONS OF CAUSE & EFFECT

"YOU'RE UNDERSTANDING THIS INFO BECAUSE YOU'RE BEGINNING TO RECOG CERTAIN WORDS"

"IF YOU LISTEN TO WHAT I'M SAYING THEN YOU'LL UNDERSTAND THE CONSTRUCTION"

"JUST HAVING STUDIED NLP MAKES YOU AN ASTUTE OBSERVER"

"SINCE YOU LEARNED SENSORY ACCUITY, YOU'LL BE A BETTER COMMUNICATOR." "YOU'RE LEARNING HAS IMPROVED SINCE YOU DECIDED TO TAKE NLP"

"YOU'RE LATE, SO WE'RE NOT GOING TO MAKE IT." "JUST LEARNING SENSORY ACCUITY CAUSES YOU TO BE A BETTER COMMUNICATOR"

ALL THESE WORDS ARE L I N G U I S T I C M A R K E R S FOR SENTENCE CONSTRUCTED AS CAUSE-EFFECT STATEMENTS.

1. THE MIND WILL WORK HARD TO MAKE SENSE - & THEREFORE

JUSTIFY - THE STATEMENT (though beware of the mismatcher!)

2. YOUR AWARENESS FOCUSES ON THE END OF THE SENTENCE & RATHER UNCRITICALLY ACCEPTS THE FIRST PART

3. EMPIRICALLY & LOGICALLY - IT MAY -OR MAY NOT - BE TRUE

4. VOICE TONE & NON-VERBALS BECOME REALLY IMPORTANT BANDLER BEGAN EACH PARAGRAPH WITH "BECAUSE" SO THAT THE MIND FOCUSED ON THE REASON, BUT ACCEPTED UNCRITICALLY

A L L THAT PRECEDE IT!

IV PRESUPPOSITIONS OF COMPLEX EQUIVALENCE CLAIMS THAT "A" = "B"

L I N G U I S T I C M A R K E R S = IS, THAT MEANS THESE WORDS CONNECT "AS YOU'RE LISTENING TO MY VOICE & BECOMING MORE AWARE OF YOU BODY, & CONTINUE BREATHING QUIETLY THAT MEANS..." & THE MIND GOES: 1-2-3 TRUE..... OK; #4 ALSO TRUE.

V PRESUPPOSITIONS OF POSSIBILITY

CAN = HE PROCESS OF DOING SOMETHING CAN'T = ABLE TO DO PROCESS OF "NOT" DOING SOMETHING I CAN'T STOP DRINKING = ABLE TO DO PROCESS OF NOT STOP DRINKING IT'S INTERESTING THAT YOU'RE ABLE TO NOT [STOP DRINKING] WHAT IF YOU LEFT OUT THE "NOT"?

"AND YOU CAAN RELAX" = YOU SHOULD OR IT'S POSSIBLE? ANS: YES

VI PRESUPPOSITIONS OF TIME

"AS YOU'RE SITTING HERE LISTENING TO WHAT I'M SAYING RIGHT NOW, I'M NOT SURE HOW YOU'RE GOING TO BE LOOKING BACK ON WHAT IT IS THAT YOU'VE LEARNED

AND I WONDER WHAT IT IS THAT YOU'RE GOING TO KNOW THAT YOU HAVE LEARNED, LOOKING BACK ON WHAT IT IS THAT YOU HAVE LEARNED. BECAUSE YOU KNOW THERE WILL BE A TIME IN THE FUTURE WHEN YOU'RE NOT SURE THAT YOU'LL BE ABLE TO USE THIS INFORMATION AND HAVING LEARNED THE INFORMATION I WONDER WHAT IT IS THAT YOU'LL LOOK BACK ON & DISCOVER WAS THE KEY POINT THAT MADE IT POSSIBLE FOR YOU TO LEARN AND YOU ARE ALL GOING TO LEARN THIS INFORMATION REALLY WELL, AREN'T YOU? AND YOU'RE ALL GOING TO DO IT, HAVEN'T YOU?" THINK OF SMALL PROBLEM YOU REGRET I'D LIKE YOU TO CONSIDER WHERE YOU WERE WHEN YOU DECIDED TO DO THAT I'D LIKE YOU TO CONSIDER WHERE YOU WERE JUST BEFORE THAT & CONSIDER ALL THE OPTIONS AVAILABLE TO YOU NOW NOW, TRY & GET THE REGRET REGRET = THEY HAVE TO KNOW NOW WHAT THEY DIDN'T BEFORE = IF ONLY I WOULD HAVE SO IF YOU ORIENT TO BEF & ASK 4 OPTIONS --> NO REGRET THE SOLUTION WILL BE AS PERMANENT AS THE PROBLEM USED TO

BE ADVERBS/ADJ ECTIVES SUPPORT WHATEVER WORDS THEY MODIFY I DON'T KNOWWHEN/HOW YOU'LL CHANGE ---> PRESUPPOSE YOU'LL CHANGE (BEC HOW/WHEN SUPPORTS IT) WHY, WHETHER OR NOT AFTER, BEFORE, "I DON'T WANT YOU TO JUST THINK OF HOW YOU'LL CHANGE. I WANT YOU TO KNOW AFTER YOU CHANGED THAT YOU HAVE. AND WHAT WILL HAVE HAPPENED HAVING LEARNED THIS INFORMATION IN THE WAY THAT YOU DID NOW"

VII PRESUPPOSITIONS OF DICHOTOMIES

INCLUDES & EXCLUDES DOUBLE BIND = ILLUSION OF CHOICE CAN GET OUT BY LEAVING THE FIELD

VIII PRESUPPOSITIONS OF ORDER

"SO THE NEXT WE'LL BE DOING HERE AFTER THE BREAK...

"NEXT " PRESUPPOSES YOU ALREADY HAVE "SO THE NEXT THING WE'LL LEARN..."

"SO THE SECOND POINT..." "THE FINAL POINT..." IMPLIES MANY HAVE PRECEDED. NOW THAT YOU'VE COME BACK FROM WHERE YOU WERE, YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY SOMEWHERES ELSE. NOTICE HOW WHEN I TALK ABOUT REP SYSTEMS YOU UNDERSTAND. BECAUSE YOUR ABILITY TO RECOGNIZE PATTERNS OF LANGUAGE AND NON-VERBAL I THINK THAT WHEN YOU REMEMBER HOW UNAWARE YOU USED TO BE OF SO MANY LINGUISTIC & BEHAVIORAL PATTERNS - YOURS & OTHERS - BEFORE STARTING THIS COURSE I'D LIKE YOU THINK ABOUT HOW UNAWARE EXERCISE: 1. DESCRIBE STUCK STATE 2. UNCOVER THE UNDERLYING PRESUPPOSITIONS THAT MAKE IT NECESSARY TO HAVE THAT STUCK STATE KEEP ASKING WHAT MAKES IT NECESSARY TO BE STUCK IN THIS MANNER 3. IDENTIFY THE OPPOSITE PRESUPPOSITIONS WHICH, IF APPLIED IN THE STUCK STATE WOULD "UNSTICK" IT. 4. HAVE "STUCK" PERSON PRESUPPOSE THEM IN THIS SITUATION 4a. RE-CYCLE TILL THEY ARE ABLE TO APPLY THE NEW PRESUPPOSITIONS 5. HAVE THEM RE-EXPERIENCE THEIR "STUCK" STATE IN LIGHT OF THE NEW ASSUMPTIONS HOW DO THEY FEEL NOW? YOU HAVE TO PUT UP WITH ALL THE POSITIVE EFFECTS OF ALL THE MISTAKES YOU MAKE. ERIKSON DICTIONARY MISTAKE = MIS-TAKE --> SO TAKE IT AGAIN, like in a movie.

Why should you pause before the "and"?

III Uncovering the Subjective Blocking Point "What stops you from [accepting my opinion]?"

"What makes you think I'm not right?"

IV Uncovering the Motivator "What makes it so important for you [to be right/ that I

accept your opinion]?" "What would have to be for you [to accept my opinion]?"

V Uncovering the Subjective Outcome "What would be the problem if [you accepted my opinion]?"

"What would happen if [I were right]?"

c Menachem Kasdan, Director Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 1999.

TIPS ON HOW TO LISTEN

1. RESPECT

2. HEAR THE UNSPOKEN

3. HEAR THE TRUTH

4. TALK LESS, LISTEN MORE

5. DEVELOP YOUR RESPONSE AS YOU LISTEN & IN RESPONSE - NOT INSTEAD OF LISTENING

6. RE-COGNIZE THE VALIDITY OF THE SPEAKER'S POSITION

7. BACKTRACK

8. EXPRESS BODY LANGUAGE & VOICE TONE CONGRUENTLY

WITH THE ABOVE

INTRO to MILTON MODEL

We normally move between Ext & Int awareness states EXTERNAL Attention Out Uptime Driving a car, Sports Conversation with a friend Ongoing [=normal] orient to external stimuli Maximum: Ve, Ae, Ke, Oe, Ge

"Normal" awareness

INTERNAL Attention In Downtime Daydream, Chess Internal Dialogue Fading [=contracted] orientation to external stimuli Maximum: Vi, Ai, Ki, Oi, Gi

Trance

META-MODEL D I S T O R T I O N

Cause-Effect: How does X cause Y?

Mind Reading: How do you know that?

Complex Equivalence: Is(n't) it possible to have one without the other?

Have you ever done one without the other?

Lost Performative: Who says so (= by what authority do you make that assertion)?

When, where, and for whom? Under what circumstances might that not be so?

Nominalization: Convert back to verb & ask: specifically?

G E N E R A L I Z A T I O N S

Modal Operators (Necessity/Chance): What stops you? How do you stop

yourself?) What would happen if ..? What do you need in

order to...? Has there ever been an

exception?

Universal Quantifiers: Exaggerate the generalization

Has there ever been an exception?

What would happen if there would be?

D LETION

Simple Deletion: (to, of, by...) whom/what?

Comparative Deletion: As compared to whom/what?

Lack of Referential Index: Who/What specifically?

Unspecified Verbs: How specifically?


??"?

Justifying Feedback Failure-to-Feedback Frame

The facts themselves aren't meaningful. Our interpretation of the facts gives them meaning.

Thus, there is no failure, there is only feedback.

"Failure" is a label which interprets a process as having ended. In fact, when interpreted as information, or feedback, so-called "failure" can be appreciated as just one more step along the way towards your objective. It even provides valuable information as to how to proceed next. It instructs you to ask:

1. What can I What am I supposed to

learn from this intermediate step along my way?

2. How can I How am I supposed to

use what I learned from this experience in the future?

3. How can I In what way am I supposed to use

this particular outcome in the future? 4. What specific elements led to this outcome such that if they were changed, the outcome would have been different? 5. What specific changes might have resulted in the outcome I did want? 6. What prevented me from doing that the first time? 7. What is needed to implement those changes next time? 8. When and where and how quickly can I find the "next time" to test my hypotheses? c Menachem Kasdan, Director, Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 1995.

Problem Frame 1. What's your problem? 2. Why is it a problem? 3. Why do you have it? 4. How long have you had it? 5. Who or what caused it? 6. Why do you still have it?Why haven't you solved it? What are your personal imitations that stop you? 7. What other obstacles and limitations hold you back? 8. Who else is to blame for this? 9. What are some of the negative consequences of the problem? 10. Who else hurts as a result of this problem? 11. How do you feel whenever you think about this problem? 12. How does it affect your self-image? Solution Frame (What's your problem ---> What are you doing or feeling that you don't want?) 1. What do you want (instead of the problem)? How would you like to be? 2. How will you know you've gotten it? What will you see, hear, and feel/have seen, heard, felt? 3. What resources do you need to obtain your outcome? 4. When in the past have you demonstrated, or used, those resources (in some other context)? 5. Where else, or from whom, can you get, or access, the resources you have not found in yourself? 6. What do you need to do to begin employing them in the present situation? 7. What will be evidence along the way that you have moved closer towards your objective? What will you see, hear, and feel? 8. Where are you now, relative to your desired outcome? 9. What are first steps you can take? 10. Are those steps too small to keep you motivated, or are they too large and frustrate you? Adjust accordingly. 11. What are reasonable time frames for accomplishing the various steps?


Ecology Frame

A. Context: When, Where, With Whom?

1. When, Where, With Whom do you want this outcome? 2. When, Where, With Whom do you not want this outcome? 3. Who else will be affected? How?

B. Advantages & Disadvantages:

Is the Gain worth the Pain? 1. What will you gain? Do you really want it? 2. What will you lose? Is it really worthwhile? 3. What sacrifices must you make along the way? 4. Are you willing to make them?

C. "Cartesian Coordinates" 1. What will having your outcome do for you? 2. What will having your outcome not do for you? 3. What will not having your outcome do for

you? 4. What will not having your outcome not do for

you? ©Menachem Kasdan, Director, Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 2001.

Calibration Exercise

S says 8 phrases, each expressing a different internal state, e.g.

sadness, happiness pleasure, pain

anger, conciliatory defensiveness, openness to new learnings

Each phrase appropriately matches the internal state, e.g. "I'm so sad" (sadness) or "I'm so pleased" (pleasure). Each phrase is stated in a tonality which appropriately matches the internal state.

P calibrates S uses a neutral phrase (e.g. "Today it will rain") in the tonalities appropriate to each of the 8 internal states without specifying which internal state is being expressed. P identifies.


Examples of Everyday Anchors & Our Responses

Extended hand upon being introduced Siren Smell of roast chicken Being handed a note Hearing a commercial jingle e.g.......... Someone waves to you Nose itch Telephone Ringing Perfume President: ......... Revolving blue light in your rear view mirror Chalk scraped across a blackboard Cigarette smoke Hearing your name called

Examples of Everyday Anchors & Our Responses

Extended hand upon being introduced

Siren

Smell of roast chicken

Being handed a note

Old McDonald …..

Someone waves to you

Nose itch

Telephone Ringing

Perfume

President: .........

Revolving red light in your rear view mirror

Chalk scraped across a blackboard

Seeing the Flag

Cigarette smoke

Hearing your name called


Auditory Anchoring Exercise

A thinks of some aspect of their personal life where they feel stuck, or inhibited, or insecure, or unfulfilled, or lacking choice. DO NOT THINK OF THE MOST STUCK etc. of such EXPERIENCES! B calibrates. A rates how it feels on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 = severely problematical). B makes sure that A breaks state. A thinks of some very positive, very happy, very exciting, very pleasant, very enthusiastic, experience. A chooses one word which best represents his/her feeling state, and says it to B in a tone that is congruent, i.e. in a tone that also reflects that internal state. B repeats the word several times in the same tonality as A. A listens until s/he is satisfied that B can reproduce the word as A has said it. B makes sure that A breaks state. A thinks of the original negative state. B calibrates. When A is again absorbed in their original "stuck", "inhibited", etc. state, s/he nods to B. B says the anchor word, and calibrates. B asks A "How do you now rate that* experience when I say [the cue word]?" A rates on scale of 1 to 10. B calibrates. *referring to the negative experience. DO NOT NAME IT, if atall possible.


ANCHORS

Anchor = any stimulus which consistently, & therefore predictably, evokes a specific response

all cultures create predictable stimulus-response sets which characterize that culture

all languages are complex auditory anchors. People will therefore experience what they talk about

Naturally occurring anchors are unintentionally acquired anchors

Anchors are usually external, e.g. an alarm clock, a red traffic light, the smell of smoke, a familiar touch, etc. Anchors are usually responded to unconsciously. In creating one intentionally, you also probably want it to work unconsciously.

A linked association is created naturally, by repetition over time, or instantly, when linked with a strong emotion

Think back to your days at school (itself a powerful anchor!) Uninteresting facts took enormous repetition to remember Exciting ones, were quickly remembered The more your emotional involvement, the stronger the learning association; the less your emotional involvement, the more the need for repetition for the association to become set

Habits are unconscious anchors or anchor chains, e.g. tying your shoes, switching a light on, or driving a car

"Negative" Anchors

The word "test" for schoolchildren is a simple anchor which usually elicits a high degree of anxiety A phobia is an anchored association between a stimulus (a dog, a confined space, etc.) and an extreme feeling of panic Speaking in public for one who has anxiety attacks when he does

"Positive" Anchors Most habits Holidays Vacation Resorts Wearing clothes which are culturally or idiosyncratically associated with positive feelings

Since we can't not make associations, & since some anchors help us while others hinder us, the technique of Intentional Anchoring allows us to control (at least some of) those associations. Anchoring gives us the means to acquire anchors we would like to have, or change those we have already acquired.

© Menachem Kasdan, Director Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 2001

INTERESTING APHORISMS

if at first you don't succeed - give up i am a victim of circumstance - others determine my fortune work is something to be tolerated till vacation adversity is the sign of impending disaster

ANYTHING WORTH DOING - IS WORTH DOING -

EVEN BADLY!

I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR MY OUTCOMES WORK IS PLAY IN EVERY ADVERSITY IS THE SEED OF VICTORY & SUCCESS

either you're lucky - or you're not. commitment limits me too much only if someone does for me first will i help them

IMPROVEMENT COMES FROM APPROPRIATE ACTION not accident COMMITMENT IS THE KEY TO SUCCESS IF I GIVE TO OTHERS- THEY WILL RECIPROCATE

better not attempt unless you’re sure you won’t make any mistakes

GOOD JUDGMENT COMES FROM EXPERIENCE – EXPERIENCE COMES FROM

BAD JUDGMENT OBSTACLES ARE WHAT YOU

SEE – WHEN YOU TAKE YOUR EYES

OFF THE GOAL


Strategies

strategies = a series of internal (& external) representations which lead to a specific outcome a strategy is defined & named by its outcome - motivation, public speaking, decision, learning etc. strategies answers question: "How do they do something?" "How is the goal accomplished?" a) 1-step strategies b) synesthesias* (2 elements) c) multi-step strategies (TOTE model; 3 or more steps) *synesthesia = overlapping/pairing of 2 rep systems

e.g. see something & the K occurs immediately with it watch eye movements in 1 place & verbal predicates other

1-step strategy = How do you know when you're being loved? How do you know when the drawer is closed?


"Strategies

strategies = a series of internal (& external) representations which lead to a specific outcome a strategy is defined & named by its outcome - motivation, public speaking, decision, learning etc. strategies answers question: "How do they do something?" "How is the goal accomplished?" a) 1-step strategies HOW KNOW WHEN HUNGRY? ? . K in stomach

? . V look @ watch ?. A announcement; bell

SPELLING STRATEGY = Vr

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN DRAWER SHUT?

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU'RE BEING LOVED? A SPECIFIC TIME YOU FELT TOTALLY LOVED? As you think & go be there now what is the first thing you saw heard felt? CONVINCED? As you think & go be there now what is the first thing you saw heard felt?

EXERCISE: Ask above Note eye movements where eyes locked in Note predicates they use b1) synesthesias* (2 elements) = overlapping/pairing of 2 rep systems Watch eye movement e.g. where V eye movement & K predicates

e.g. see something & the K occurs immediately with it

watch eye movements in 1 place & verbal predicates other

TYPING STRATEGY = Ve / Ke

b2) 2-steps: e.g. V for being loved; K for reassurance or convincing e.g. Ad & K loop for running

c) multi-step strategies (TOTE model; 3 or more steps)

CHUNKING = Processing for patterns; Organizing & SEQUENCING of raw experience in way easy to make sense, to remember & to replicate

Strategies curiosity what do you need for succceeding in NLP? what are the 3 things you need? RR sign = Stop Look & Listen see tracks, hear bells RR sign JOLT you Flying = compare where you are & where you want to get to what do I have & what do I need? Satisfaction, Fits like a glove when they match up & feel just right

T O T E MODEL

T = Trigger CREATES or starts THE (state of) NEED TO OR WANT

so that you will begin TO GO THROUGH THE PROCESS.

BRINGS UP CRITERION in person WHICH NEEDS TO BE MET

answers: How do you know W H E N to [begin the process]?

o = Operations answers: How is an alternative to the PS generated? W H A T steps or operations or steps do you go through in order to do the process of finding the alternative?

T = Test COMPARES the NEED created by Trigger to the ALTERNATIVE created by the Operations stage answers: Does the alternative to the PS fit your CRITERIA for a match between the new alternative & the Desired Outcome? Does what you can get, match (sufficiently) with what you want?

E = Exit answers: Is the alternative acceptable - If YES - GO FOR IT! or

If NO (i.e. the alternative is NOT acceptable) - GO BACK to Operations stage


S T R A T E G Y N O T A T I O N

Representational Systems V = Visual A = Auditory K = Kinesthetic O/G = Olfactory/Gustatory Superscripts e - external i - internal r - remembered c - construct Subscripts t - tonal d - digital Syntactic Symbols ---> leads to / comparison / synesthesia m ---> meta ---> polarity p K----> Ad --->Ke

I n s t a l l a t i o n

I dk how long it will take/how soon it will be for you to V see how K stuck you'll get & notice if Ad if that makes sense to you - then do it & you can, haven't you (tag question)?

Submodalities

Visual

Location in space (= quadrant; up/down, right/left) Associated (= seen through own eyes) or Dissociated (observing self from the "outside") Brightness (brighter or dimmer) Framed or Panoramic/Unbounded Color Intensity/Black & White Size of Picture Movie/Still/Slides/Collage Size of Central Objects (real life, smaller, larger) Movement: Faster/Slower Depth (= 3-dimensional) or flat (= 2-dimensional) Distance (near or far away) Clarity (focused or blurred) Speed (if movie: faster or slower than usual) Intermittent or Steady Focus Angle Viewed From

Auditory

Volume: Loud or soft Pitch: high or low Location (above/below, right/left, inside/outside, stereo/mono) Tune Distance Words or sounds Duration Direction Cadence: (interruptions, grouping) Uniqueness of Sound Clarity: clear or muffled Speed Tone: soft or harsh Timbre: quality/fullness of sound Inflection (words marked off) Rhythm (regular/irregular)

Kinesthetic

Location Intensity Internal/External Size Pressure Texture (rough or smooth) Weight (light or heavy) Temperature Duration Shape Movement

Type: waves, needles Speed Sharp or dull Steady/Intermittent

c Menachem Kasdan, Director Jerusalem Institute for NLP, 1996

Submodalities Checklist: Map AcrossVisual

Location Associated or Dissociated Bright or Dim Color or Black & White Size of Picture Movie/Still/Slides/Collage Size of Central Objects Movement: Fast or Slow Framed or Panoramic/Unbounded

3-D or Flat Distance Clarity Speed Intermittent or Steady Focus

Angle Viewed From Auditory

Volume: Loud or soft Pitch: high or low Location: above/below right/left inside/outside stereo/mono Distance Words or sounds Cadence Tune

Duration Direction Uniqueness of Sound Clarity Speed Tone: soft or harsh Timbre Inflection Rhythm

Kinesthetic Location Intensity Internal/External Size Pressure Texture (rough or smooth) Weight (light or heavy) Temperature Duration Shape Movement Type: waves, needles Speed Sharp or dull Steady/Intermittent © Menachem Kasdan, Director Jerusalem Institute

for NLP, 2001

BELIEF CHANGE TECHNIQUE

Part 1

UNDOING LIMITING/PROBLEM BELIEF 1. Elicit a limiting belief. Pick one about identity [I'm not good enough; not smart; too lazy] or possibility [I can't do X].

Do you have a belief that limits you? Do not choose a belief about other people. If your partner offers a limiting belief concerning others, convert it into a belief about self by asking: "What do you need to believe about yourself so that you can react to them as you'd like" or "What do you need to believe about yourself so that that condition could more likely happen?"

2. Elicit a description of a picture representing that belief.

Do you have a picture representing that limiting belief? If you don't you could pretend having one - so the change will happen quicker; assuming that you'd want it to happen quicker. And you do want the change to be fast & easy & quick, don't you? So to that extent would it be OK if you just imagined you were aware of your pictures? That would be alright, isn't it?

3. Identify the submodalities. 4. Elicit OFFER a description of a belief which used to be true but no longer is true, e.g. you once were 10 years old & you know that's no longer true now. 4. Elicit the picture representing that belief. 5. Identify its submodalities. 6. Swissh the pictures, giving the limiting belief the submodalities of the belief which is no longer true.

Now shoot picture of limiting belief off way way out into distance & have it snap back to where picture of the belief which used to be true but no longer is & give the limiting belief the submodality characteristics of the no-longer true belief.


BELIEF CHANGE TECHNIQUE

Part 2

INSTALLING OUTCOME/SOLUTION BELIEF

1. Elicit the Desired Belief. What would you like to believe instead? Opposite of limiting belief. make sure it fits well-formedness conditions - in positives, control, ecology check... 1a. Ecology Check: OK, so you want to believe that .... & calibrate that they are unreservedly committed to it

2. Elicit the picture of the Desired Belief. Make picture of that belief, perhaps of you embodying that belief or any representation of that belief which you'd like. For Auditories, say it to yourself in that voice which has full conviction. Calibrate that they access it.

3. Identify its submodalities. 4. Elicit OFFER a description of an absolute utter belief, e.g. that the sun will come up tomorrow. Or breathing is useful. Theearth is round. (Not "I'm a good person" 'cause they don't always really believe it.) 5. Identify submodalities of utter belief 6. Now shoot picture of new belief, the one you want to believe in – the opposite of the old one which you no longer believe in – way way out into distance & have it snap back to occupy the same place where picture of the belief which you know to be absolutely true is located & with its other submodality characteristics, so that you don't see that picture of the sun arising but see the picture of the new belief in its place & with its submodality characteristics..

Have four voices to anchor the different beliefs by tonality! Remember: You're working with structure - not content!

7. Test:

a. Note physiological shift b. Try to retrieve old picture c. Ask why they believe new belief is true d. Try to get old feelings back e. FUTURE PACE - imagine how you'll be in the future


NEW BEHAVIOR GENERATOR

Identify a situation where you characteristically respond in a way which you'd like to change.

1. Ask yourself how you’d ideally like to be in that situation.

(eyes down to Ad position)

2. See yourself as you’d ideally like to be in that situation. Create a compelling DISSOCIATED PICTURE of YOU exactly the way you want to be ideally, having all the qualities, characteristics & abilities you want, as if you had already accomplished the change.

(eyes up to Vc position)

3. Float into picture to test it out. Do you feel totally satisfied?

(eyes down to K position)

If no, recycle back to beginning. If yes, exit


sUBMODALITIES ExerciseS

1. Think of a past experience, e.g. getting up yesterday morning. Think of a future one, e.g. getting up tomorrow morning. Elicit the submodalities differences. 2. Think of someone you like. Think of someone you don't like. Elicit the submodalities differences. 3. Think of a pleasant and resourceful experience. Elicit the submodalities. Think of a stressful and resourceless experience and elicit its submodalities. Change the submodalities of the stressful situation to those of the pleasant and resourceful one. How does that change your experience now?

S W I S H H H P A T T E R N

1 . A i d e n t i f i e s s o m e t h i n g s / h e w o u l d l i k e t o c h a n g e o r a s i t u a t i o n i n w h i c h s / h e w o u l d l i k e t o b e m o r e r e s o u r c e f u l . 2 . A i m a g i n e s / r e m e m b e r s t h e l i m i t i n g s i t u a t i o n . M a k e s u r e t h i s i m a g i n a t i o n / m e m o r y t r i g g e r s t h e r e s p o n s e i n A . 3 . I d e n t i f y t w o s u b m o d a l i t i e s ( u s u a l l y v i s u a l ) w h o s e c h a n g e s t r o n g l y c h a n g e s A ' s r e a c t i o n . ( F o r m o s t p e o p l e s i z e a n d b r i g h t n e s s a r e m o s t e f f e c t i v e . ) B t e s t s t h e m o u t . 4 . B r e a k S t a t e . 5 . B i n s t r u c t s A t o m a k e a p i c t u r e o f h o w s / h e / i t w o u l d b e i f t h e d e s i r e d c h a n g e h a d a l r e a d y t a k e n p l a c e . H o w w o u l d y o u l i k e t o b e ? H o w w o u l d y o u b e r e s p o n d i n g d i f f e r e n t l y ? T h e p i c t u r e s h o u l d b e d i s s o c i a t e d , i . e . A s h o u l d s e e h e r / h i m s e l f t h e w a y t h e y w o u l d b e i n t h e d e s i r e d s i t u a t i o n . M a k e s u r e i t i s e c o l o g i c a l . M a k e s u r e i t i s b e l i e v a b l e . M a k e s u r e t h e i m a g e i s c o m p e l l i n g e n o u g h t o p r o d u c e a s h i f t t o a m o r e p o s i t i v e s t a t e . 6 . B r e a k s t a t e . 7 . P u t f i r s t p i c t u r e i n b i g b r i g h t f r a m e d s q u a r e . S h r i n k t h e d e s i r e d s t a t e p i c t u r e t o t h e s i z e o f a b l a c k d o t a n d p l a c e i t i n o n e o f t h e c o r n e r s o f t h e f i r s t p i c t u r e . 8 . P l a c e t h e t w o p i c t u r e s a s i f t h e y w e r e t h e c a r s o n t h e c a b l e s u c h t h a t a s t h e f i r s t r e c e d e s t h e s e c o n d a p p r o a c h e s . B e x p l a i n s t h a t t h e n e a r e r p i c t u r e w i l l s l i d e b a c k a w a y i n t h e d i r e c t i o n o f t h e D S p i c t u r e . T h e c l o s e r o n e w i l l b e c o m e s m a l l e r a n d s m a l l e r a n d d a r k e r a n d d a r k e r u n t i l i t b e c o m e s a d o t , w h i l e t h e D S p i c t u r e w i l l b e c o m e l a r g e r a n d l a r g e r a n d c l e a r e r a n d c l e a r e r a s i t a p p r o a c h e s . M a k e s u r e t h i s h a p p e n s E X T R E M E L Y F A S T ! 9 . B u s e s g e s t u r e s a n d s o u n d s ( " S W I S H H H " o r " W h o o s h h h " ) t o a s s i s t .

1 0 . B r e a k s t a t e . 1 1 . R e p e a t 5 t i m e s q u i c k l y . 1 2 . H a v e A t r y t o l o o k a t t h e f i r s t i m a g e . I f t h e n e w o n e d o e s n ' t i m m e d i a t e l y a n d a u t o m a t i c a l l y o c c u r , r e p e a t s t e p s 8 - 1 0 s e v e r a l m o r e t i m e s . 1 3 . F u t u r e P a c e . H a v e A i m a g i n e w h a t w i l l h a p p e n i n t h e f u t u r e .

C H A I N I N G P r o b l e m S t a t e O u t c o m e S t a t e P r o c r a s t i n a t i o n - - - - - - - - - - - > M o t i v a t i o n S t u c k - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - > G o F o r I t W h a t f e e l i n g / e m o t i o n i s h a l f w a y b e t w e e n P S & O S .

1 . P r o c r a s t i n a t i o n - - - - - - - - - - - > 5 . M o t i v a t i o n 1 . S t u c k - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - > 5 . G o F o r I t What's right in the middle such that if I were to feel it, it would cause me to go for the outcome? Insertion closest to PS should have its directionality away from, while the emotion closest to OS should have its directionality towards . Modulate tempo with each emotion i.e. fast to slow (in our cases). ( P A N I C ) - > H E S I T A T I O N - > I M P A T I E N C E - > O N T H E V E R G E S T U C K - > C O N F U S I O N - > C U R I O U S I T Y - > G O F O R I T ! F E A R - > A L E R T - > C U R I O U S I T Y - > P O S I T I V E E X P E C T A T I O N

PERSONALITY

BEHAVIOR THEORY

Personality = an abstraction which is really no more than the sum total of a person's behavioral tendencies

NON-BEHAVIORISTS

Personality = the sum total of internal traits which cause a person's behavioral tendencies providing the word "behavior" includes cognitions (thinking patterns) and emotional reactions as well as motoric activities.

Personality theorists identify classify sameness differences between people sameness despite different biological & social pressures differences despite (seemingly) similar biological & social pressures The personality theorist recognizes that biology & socialization (incl all cultural pressures) are determinants of people's ways of "being" in the world & interacting with it. But they assume there is something within the HB - his "psychological" makeup which must also be included. And is often paramount. Recurring patterns of how people interact with their environment. Repetition & continuity often degrees of predictability. The personality theorist generally deals with groups he claims are representative, & he will deal with thoughts, feelings & behavior patterns relating to a person's GOALS & DIRECTIONALITY in life generally deals with adults Maddi: Personality is a stable set of characteristics & tendencies that determine those commonalities and differences in the psychological behavior - thoughts, feelings & actions - of people

that have continuity in time and which may or may not be easily understood in terms of the biol & soc pressures of the immediate sit MK The problem with framing a hypothesis is that you start searching for confirmation & disregarding alternatives STORY: FISH NY stories: TORN COAT TAXI DRIVER

CONFLICT MODEL

Individuality vs Social Pressures: Psycho-Social model Freud: basic tendency - maximize instinctual gratification while minimizing punishment & guilt 2 Fears: IntraPsychic Rank: basic tendency: minimize the fear of life (= separation, independence, individuation) minimize the fear of death (= merging, dependence, fusion)

FULFILLMENT MODEL

Actualization Model = "pressure" or "drive" or "push" in person to become whatever it is in their inherited nature/potentialities to be.

selfishness to Freud expresses man's "true" nature selfishness to Rogers is a distortion of man's true nature

Maslow physiological needs safety needs belongingness & love esteem Perfection Model = Adler striving to superiority (earlier: "will to power" but couldn't square with his own personal commitment to public service) Fromm variation on this model BOTH ABOVE MODELS STRESS SOME INHERENT NATURE OF MAN

CONSISTENCY MODEL : COGNITIVE DISSONANCE VERSION

Kelly: Man tries to predict & control; like a scientist McClelland: minimize large discrepancies between expectation & occurrence maximize small discrepancies bec when bored we desire it

CONSISTENCY MODEL : ACTION VERSION Maddi: maintenance of match between normal excitatory or tension levels CONFLICT MODEL Assumes 2 opposing life forces Success; Best life expectation = compromise balance betw forces Goal: minimize anxiety & conflict FULFILLMENT MODEL Assumes unfolding of some one great life force Success; Best life expectation = vigorous expression of force in everyday life

SUBJECTIVITY MODEL A person's commitment to a model of personality 1. Creating one 2. Accepting one = (f) cognitions & emotions in particular cultural context EXAMPLES: Consider probable impact of a deterministic standpoint e.g. BEHAVIORISM on a person who passionately values a sense of autonomy. Consider probable impact of a Sartrean ontology of radical freedom of the individual on someone who cannot bear the sense of responsibility & guilt such an approach demands of him to accept. CONTENT ORIENTED MODEL Psycho-biographical attempts to clarify "the network of conceptual, symbolic, & emotional meanings" making up the subjective "representational" world of the person being analyzed.

EXAMPLES: Freud - problems in relationship with mother & :. father Jung - scientific/poetic/mystic side PROCESS ORIENTED NLP - HOW CREATE & DU?PLICATE? NLP is a process & a model of a process

Therefore it doesn't really deal with a "theory" of personality

Personality = the sum total of internal 1) information processing tendencies and 2) the contents of that processing - the two making up that person's model of the world - which cause a person's behavioral tendencies, where "behavior" includes cognitions (thinking patterns) and emotional reactions as well as motoric activities.

LOGICAL LEVELS in NLP Spiritual, Transcendent - Mission? Identity - Who? Values, Beliefs - Why? Capabilities - How? Behavior - What? Environment - Where?

PERSONALITY

BEHAVIOR THEORY

Personality = an abstraction which is really no more than the sum total of a person's behavioral tendencies

NON-BEHAVIORISTS

Personality = the sum total of internal traits which cause a person's behavioral tendencies providing the word "behavior" includes cognitions (thinking patterns) and emotional reactions as well as motoric activities.

Personality theorists identify classify sameness differences between people sameness despite different biological & social pressures differences despite (seemingly) similar biological & social pressures 1. CONFLICT MODEL Freud 2. FULFILLMENT MODEL A. Actualization Model a. Rogers b. Maslow B. Perfection Model Adler 3. CONSISTENCY MODEL A. Cognitive Dissonance Model B. Action Model 4. SUBJECTIVITY MODEL A. Content Oriented Model Psycho-Biographical B. Process Oriented Model NLP NLP - HOW CREATE & DU?PLICATE? NLP is a process & a model of a process

Therefore it doesn't really deal with a "theory" of personality

"Personality" = the sum total of 1) information processing tendencies (internal and external) and 2) the contents of that processing - the two making up that person's model of the world - which explain a person's behavioral tendencies, where "behavior" includes cognitions (thinking patterns) and emotional reactions as well as motoric activities.

LOGICAL LEVELS in NLP

Spiritual, Transcendent - Mission? Identity - Who? Values, Beliefs - Why? Capabilities - How? Behavior - What? Environment - Where?

External vs Internal determined behavior Behaviorists vs Rest

Rest

Internal a priori Structure vs Rest Freud

Rest

Internal Expression of Self Allport Adler Expectationists Cognitive Dissonance Maddi Process

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