TheGood Practice

GuideParent

and ToddlerGroups

for

Building Relationships - Strengthening Community

Copyright © Care for the Family / The Mothers’ Union / The Salvation Army 2003All rights reserved.

Care for the Family aims to promote strong family life and to help those hurting becauseof family breakdown.

The Mothers’ Union exists to share Christ’s love by encouraging, strengthening andsupporting marriage and family life.

The Salvation Army is an international Christian church working in 109 countriesworldwide. As a registered charity, The Salvation Army demonstrates its Christianprinciples through social welfare provision and is one of the largest, most diverseproviders of social welfare in the world.

The Good Practice Guide for Parent and Toddler Groups:Building Relationships - Strengthening Community

Care for the Family, The Mothers’ Union and The Salvation Army are all committed tosupporting families, and that is why they have worked collaboratively to produce thisresource. They want to support you in the valuable job you’re doing, to provide practicalguidelines about how to run a successful group and to promote the importantcontribution that parent and toddler groups make to local communities.

Parent and toddler groups: making a difference 5

Making friends and finding support 6

Leader and team: the vital factor for a successful group 8

Creating a successful parent and toddler group 10

What happens at the group? 12

Parent and toddler groups: basic procedures 14

Keeping children safe: child protection issues 17

Health and safety issues 19

Communicating with your group and your community 22

Further support for families 24

Useful contacts and resources 25

The Parent and Toddler Group Charter 30

Sample welcome letter/parental agreement 31

Sample registration form 32

Sample weekly attendance record 33

Contents

3

Parent and toddler groups can be the only adult company that manyparents and carers have during the week. Because of this, the group hasa great impact on their lives; probably more than most group leaders can imagine!

That’s why I’m so pleased that Care for the Family, The Mothers’ Unionand The Salvation Army have worked together to produce this resourcefor parent and toddler groups. By doing so, they are affirming groupleaders and teams across the country.

These groups provide great places for parents and carers to meet andmake friends. They are places where children make friends, learn andinteract together too, which can’t be a bad thing! And these friendshipsoften carry on outside the group, as families visit each other’s homes –so much better than mums sitting at home feeling isolated. Suchfriendships can last a lifetime.

Not only do parent and toddler groups offer friendship, but they can belife-saving for families in crisis. The number of people who are helpedby parent and toddler groups is endless – not only the children andparents, but also their wider families and those they meet during theirday-to-day lives.

So as you carry out your valuable role, do take the support that thesethree organisations are offering here. I’m thrilled to be asked to endorseThe Good Practice Guide for Parent and Toddler Groups, and I do so withthe prayer that even more parents, carers and children will ultimatelybenefit from its wisdom.

Diane Louise JordanTV and Radio presenter

Building relationships -strengthening community

4

There you sit, quaking in yourshoes, waiting in the studio ofBBC2’s Newsnight programme.You’re going to be interviewedby Jeremy Paxman or one ofthose other interviewers theygrace with that terrifyingadjective ‘incisive’.

You’re being interviewed because you aregoing to start a parent and toddler group –or perhaps you’re already running one butyou want to make it even better. And this‘incisive’ interviewer is going to fix you withhis penetrating stare and his raisedeyebrow and ask: “What’s so special aboutparent and toddler groups?”

Here are some great responses:

Parent and toddler groups provide a safeand happy environment for children toplay, learn and interact.

They provide a welcoming place for allparents and carers to make friends andfeel supported.

Groups can be the basis for developinglong-lasting relationships for youngfamilies looking for friendship and support.

They can offer a lifeline to families incrisis, support for parents having a toughtime or just dealing with theongoing demands of children.

Groups can be a starting point to goforward, maybe branching out intoparenting groups and other supportivecourses. They offer a surrogate, orextended, family to the families thatattend.

Ultimately, parent and toddler groupsmake a great contribution to the life ofa community.

Care for the Family, The Mothers’ Unionand The Salvation Army are all committedto supporting families, and that is why theyhave worked collaboratively to producethis resource. They want to support you inthe valuable job you’re doing, to providepractical guidelines about how to run asuccessful group and to promote theimportant contribution that parent andtoddler groups make to local communities.

Parent and toddler groups:making a difference

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Our parent and toddlergroup isn’t just a morningsession to me, it’s alifestyle. The familiesthat come to my groupare important to mebecause they are part ofthe community in which Ilive. We go out formeals, watch videos; Iinvite them to parentinggroups and church. Ireally want to help buildmy community, andparent and toddler is anatural way of meetingfamilies.

Cathy, group leader

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It’s a typical morning at parentand toddler group and thehappy chatter of busy childrencan be heard around the crafttable, as they make friends witheach other and with the team.The children are cutting andcolouring animals to fit into agiant ark.

Josh is keen to pass on his news: “I’ve comewith Grandad today because Mummy hasgone to Tesco to get our new baby!”

The parents, carers and team membersaround the table join with Josh in hisexcitement, and exchange a knowing smilewith his grandad. “My daughter’s due tohave her third next month,” says agrandmother who has brought ‘the othertwo’ to the group. The two grandparentsstart to discuss their role as part-timecarers for their children’s children.

As they help their children to cut out theanimals, Kate and Emma are making friendswith a new mother who has come to thegroup for the first time.

“I first came here so Sarah could learn tomix with other children,” Kate explains.“And it was a way for us to meet newpeople when we moved to the area. Manyof my close friends now are the people I’vemet through the group.”

“I came here for my sake!” laughs Emma. “I wanted to get out of the house and seeother adults – life with a three- and one-year-old can sometimes be tedious. Now,

William loves the range of activities he cando – and all in 90 minutes.” She smiles,and adds: “For me, having a cup of teamade for me and eating ‘nice’ biscuits issuch a treat.”

Elsewhere in the room, while theirchildren play happily with the train set,Elizabeth and Pauline swap notes about thelifeline offered by the group.

“I like coming here as much as Thomas –it keeps him happy, so it keeps me happy!”says Elizabeth. “I’ve found the help andsupport from this group has helped methrough some tough times.”

“Parent and toddler has been a lifeline tome,” admits Pauline, encouraged to speakup by hearing that someone else has beenthrough tough times too. “I suffered frompostnatal depression and it was actuallyJoanne, the group leader, who encouragedme to seek help. Then she helped somemore, by babysitting and sometimes evencooking us a meal.”

Joanne, passing behind the women as theytalk, smiles to hear Pauline opening up toanother mother. A sign of a good recovery,she thinks, as she goes into the kitchen,where another team member is pouringthe children’s drinks in preparation for storytime. Joanne has heard so many painfulstories from parents and carers, and itmakes her happy every time she sees themovercoming their difficulties.

Take Nadia, for example – such a brightand intelligent woman, yet obviouslyweighed down by some hidden problem.She didn’t want to join in much; she evenrefused to join the rota of parents whohelped clear away the toys.

Making friends and finding support

6

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Some young mums livemiles away from theirown mothers. Sometimesthey just want to ask forthe tiniest piece of advicein passing. At othertimes, it’s a long heart to heart.Margaret

It was only after a year, when she said shewouldn’t be coming any more, that Joannefound out a little of her story. She had beengoing through a crisis in her marriage andfelt she just wanted to attend, but not takeon any responsibility. “But I’m so gratefulfor the support,” she said, “and now I’mhappier and I feel able to give somethingback. I want to share something of whatI’ve received from you.” She intended toget involved in a group closer to her homeand offer to help there, even when her sonno longer attended.

The refreshments are ready, so Joannegathers children, parents and carerstogether. Juice and biscuits are handed outto the seated children, and Joanne opensthe book.

“Our story today,” she begins, “is all abouta man called Noah…..”

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I went along to myparent and toddler grouplooking for a place to findcompanionship and formy children to meetother children. I endedup joining a parentinggroup and going along tothe church with thepeople who went to mygroup. I really got morethan I bargained for. Itwas great – my life iscompletely different now.

Claire

As leader, you will probably bethe one who carries the visionfor the group and makesdecisions about the day-to-dayrunning. Your role is tomaintain standards and tooversee the team, the sessionand the future of the group.You will be keen to make yourgroup an excellent one with agood reputation.

Ideally, a regular, reliable team is animportant part of a parent and toddlergroup. Therefore, try to find people fromall age groups and walks of life, who shareyour vision. Allow them to use their giftsfor the benefit of the group, whetherthrough craft activities or excellent listeningskills. Some will have faced difficulties in lifethat will enable them to empathise with agroup member, such as bereavement,infertility or postnatal depression.

Invest in your teamMeet socially outside the group setting;have at least an annual social outing. Talktogether as you work, and build up theirconfidence with heaps of praise. Supportthem and allow them to support you, too.

Welcome feedback from your team;encourage them to pass on their ideas andconcerns, and take seriously what they say.Be aware that they may be having difficultissues to deal with in their own lives, solisten sympathetically if they want to talk,and remember to keep asking how thingsare progressing.

If you have few team members and feelslightly overwhelmed, a rota of parents andcarers might be a good way of ensuringeveryone takes a turn in doing a particularjob. Asking them to participate in this waymakes parents and carers feel they areessential parts of the group. And whoknows, one of them may become a valuedmember of your team in the future.

Support for youYou should also try to find someone outsidethe group to support you so that you don’tbecome overwhelmed with the

responsibility of group leader. This mightbe a family member, close friend or, if

your group is affiliated to a church,the minister or leader.

Some parent and toddlergroups have a managementgroup which shares thedecision-making and carefor the team. Themanagement group shouldgive clear guidelines andinformation to the team,supporting them at all times.

Leader and team: the vital factor for a successful group

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I do feel the weight ofresponsibility sometimes.But I’m so delighted bythe people I meet, andby the impact we haveon people. I really thinkit’s worth it. My teammeans so much to me.Jackie, group leader

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Know your boundariesDon’t take on burdens that are not yours.If a member of your group needs furthersupport, you are not responsible forproviding it. But you can point them in theright direction. If your group is part of achurch, you will probably have links locallyto a vast array of skills, life experiences andprojects that you can draw on. Furtherhelp is available from the organisationslisted on pages 24-27.

Parents and carers are responsible fortheir children at all times. You are,however, responsible for anything that isin the best interest of the whole group.So, for example, if you have an ongoingproblem of one parent telling off otherpeople’s children, take the parent asideand explain that everyone is responsiblefor their own, not other people’s children.If one child is hurting another and their

parent does nothing about it, it islegitimate for you to step in and talk withthe passive parent. Explain that it is in thebest interest of the group for them tointervene in their child’s behaviour.

Do your best!There are a huge variety of parent andtoddler groups across the country, butyour group is unique. Whatever its sizeand however long it has been running,you are aiming to do the best you can.Always be on the lookout for new waysforward, but don’t be put off if you can’tachieve everything that is recommendedin this resource – for example, if you don’thave the money to buy so muchequipment. You will be valued for whoyou are by the people who come to yourgroup. And you are providing a valuableservice to the community.

We have great funtogether. We oftencombine cleaning toysand then going outtogether; we have agreat time. It’d be evenbetter if we didn’t haveto clean the toys!

Chris, team member

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Remember!• Gather together a good team with a

variety of skills• Invest in your team• Find someone to support you• Know your boundaries• Be on the lookout for new ways forward• Make use of resources

Give a genuine welcomeAt the heart of a good group are peoplewho draw others back time and time again.Always make sure everyone is given agenuine welcome, so that they will feelsecure and more likely to return for asecond visit.

Make your point of registration friendlyand informal. Give out an introductoryleaflet or letter (see page 31 for details). If you have several members on yourteam, one member should welcome andanother should take each new personthrough to show them the fire exits, toiletsand changing facilities, and introduce themto others.

Aim to introduce them to one or two ofyour most friendly group members whowill include them in conversations andactivities. It can be difficult for newcomersto remember more than a couple ofnames on their first visit.

If possible, have a comfortable chair forpregnant mums so they do not have tosit on a tiny children’s chair for thewhole session.

Extend your warmthbeyond the first sessionHowever friendly you areon that first meeting, youwill need to keep it up!It will take a fewsessions for anewcomer to feel athome. Aim toremember the child’sname and somethingabout the parent/carer.

Some will come purely so that their childcan play with other children, but others arehoping for much more than that. They maybe looking for friendship, advice, or timewith other adults. Your group can be aplace where they find sincere people whohave a true concern for them.

Nurture all who come to your groupCherish the parents, carers and children inyour group by letting them know they arespecial. You are providing security and lovefor the children, as well as the opportunityto play and develop social skills.

You can provide encouragement forparents who may be experiencing a time oflow self esteem. Parents and carers will feelthat they are an essential part of the groupif they are encouraged to help in itssmooth running. Encourage them tobefriend newcomers; ask them to assistwith craft activities or to help in tidyingaway equipment. Always remember to

Creating a successful parent and toddler group

10

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One mother came whowas married to anoverseas student. Shebarely spoke ourlanguage and we didn’tspeak hers, but we gotalong very well. She wastearful when the familyreturned home. She saidshe would really miss us.The group had meant somuch to her when shewas in a strange countrywith only her children forcompany.Lynn

thank them for any contribution they havemade and involve them by means ofconsultation. Listen to their suggestionsregarding the running of the group.

Offer a listening earIf a parent or carer is experiencing difficultcircumstances, you (or someone in yourteam) may be the person they need to talkto. Don’t undervalue the impact oflistening, and remember that listening is notgiving advice or making judgements. Bystepping in too quickly with advice you canstop people opening up any further.Listening attentively and giving people yourtime can, in many cases, be as much aspeople need.

Some people may require more than alistening ear, so attempt to find more help

for them. Don’t try to do it yourself! If yourgroup is affiliated to a church, the churchmay be able to offer resources forcounselling, help and care. Details of otherorganisations which provide further helpcan be found on pages 24-27.

Be the place where real friendshipsare made Ultimately, the parent and toddler group isa place where real friendships can begin;some just for the short term and othersmore lasting. It’s a two-way thing! Not onlywill parents and carers find friendship, butthe team will discover new friends too!Consider it a privilege to serve those whocome through your doors.

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Remember!• Give a genuine welcome• Extend your warmth beyond the

first session• Nurture all who come to your group• Offer a listening ear• Be the place where real friendships

are made

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I come to parent andtoddler because thepeople that run it arefun. They seeminterested in me.Nick

All parent and toddler groupsare unique and you will findthe right structure to suityours. The followingprogramme is a sample of atypical session which, if youwish, can be adapted to meet the needs of theparents/carers in your group.

The average time a group runs is twohours, but the time limit is up to you asteam leader.

Welcome and registration An important occasion – see page 10‘Creating a successful parent and toddlergroup’.

Unstructured beginningHave available toys such as the train set, carsand story area so children can play freelywhile their parents/carers chat with eachother and with team members. Do nothave sit and ride toys available at this stage.

Craft tableA craft table can operate throughout themorning, allowing the parents/carers andchildren to come and go. It provides agood place for parents/carers to chat to ateam member while helping their childwith the activity.

Your activity could tie in with the story youtell or mark significant dates in the calendar.For example:

Make decorations which you can useon the Christmas tree at the parent andtoddler Christmas party; tell the story ofthe nativity at story time.

Make cards for Mothering Sunday andFathers Day – but be sensitive as not allchildren live with both parents.

Make animal faces out of paper platesand tell the story of Noah’s Ark at story time.

Decorate biscuits to eat on children’s birthdays.

Story timeEncourage parents to listen to the storyalong with the children; this will help thechildren to understand that story time isnot a time to talk. Serve drinks and biscuitsto the children while they are sitting down.

Happy birthdayIf a child in your group is celebrating his/herbirthday, sing Happy Birthday at the end ofthe story. You could have special biscuits,an artificial cake with candles, or a birthdayboard (a notice board with a list of thechildren’s birthdays for that week, withbirthday cards on and a ‘happy birthday’banner across the top).

Free play for the children; tea/coffeefor parents/carersWhile the children play freely, serve hotdrinks with biscuits to parents/carers. Ensurethe children are safe from the hot drinks.

Sit and ride toysAs it nears the end of the session, it is agood time for children to play on the sit andride toys, thus enabling them to let offsteam before they go home. A safe area forthe babies, which must always be available,is particularly important at this time.

What happens at the group?

12

Song time and noticesAsk parents/carers to join in with theirchildren, and sit everyone in a circle. Askdifferent children for their favourite song,and sing three or four of these beforefinishing with one song; many groups finishwith the same song each week to mark theend of the session.

If you are a Christian group, include a faith-based song or prayer during the song time.

Link the song and the craft activity, wherepossible. For example, if your activity wasmaking animal faces, you could sing ‘Whobuilt the ark? – Noah, Noah’. For details offurther resources, see page 26 or contactyour own organisation.

The end of song time is a good opportunityto hand out notices for the following weekor future events.

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Remember!• Welcome and registration for all visitors• Unstructured beginning to the session• Have an ongoing craft table with a

structured activity • Tell a story and give the children

a drink • Sing Happy Birthday when appropriate• More play time and drinks for the adults• Time to sit and ride• Song time and give out notices

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During story time I wasreading The Three LittlePigs: ‘… and so the pigwent up to the man withthe wheelbarrow full ofstraw and asked if hecould have some strawto build his house..’.‘Don’t be silly!’ shoutedIsaac. ‘Pigs can’t talk!’Lynn

Before the meetingRegistration formNew parents/carers joining your groupshould fill in a registration form. You willfind a sample form on page 32. You maywish to use the contact details supplied toproduce an address list for theparents/carers involved in the group.

Data protection declaration: A statementshould be made on the form about howthe information supplied on it will bestored and used and who will have accessto it. The person completing the formmust be asked to give their written consentfor the information to be used in the waysindicated. The information supplied mustnot be used for any purpose other thanthose stipulated. For further advice, contactyour organisation.

Please note: Salvation Army groups arerequired to use the official Salvation ArmyData Protection Notice on all registrationforms.

Weekly attendance recordIn addition to the registration form youneed to keep a weekly attendance record.This allows you to keep track of every teammember, visitor, parent/carer and child thatis on the premises during each session. Thisis necessary if you have to evacuate thepremises in the event of a fire.

Medical conditions/allergy recordIt is essential (and can be life-saving) tomaintain a record of children’s medicalconditions (eg asthma, epilepsy), andallergies. It is also important to recordspecial dietary requirements. For example,some children may have a milk or nutallergy; others may be vegetarians and

therefore unable to eat certain biscuits.These details should be given on theregistration form, and a further note madein the daily register when the childrenarrive. Of course, parents/carers areresponsible for what their children eat anddrink, but it is helpful for the whole team tobe aware of the needs.

Accident book If a child or parent has an accident while atthe group, it must be recorded in anaccident book. The details needed are thetime, the type of injury, the first aidadministered and whether or not a visit tothe doctor or hospital was necessary. Theparent/carer should sign to show that whatyou have recorded is acceptable to them.Keep the accident book in a place whereany member of your team can find it easily.

Your organisation may have its own officialaccident book; if not, you can order onefrom your local branch of WHSmith (seepage 26).

Parent and toddler groups: basic procedures

14

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I really love it whenpeople say we are thebest group in the town.We’ve got a waiting listto prove it’s true!Jennie

Incident bookKeeping a record of other incidents, suchas two children persistently fighting, or achild damaging property, is also advisable.

Money mattersIf you are running a Salvation Army orMothers’ Union group, seek advice fromyour organisation about how to deal withfinancial matters, and their approach tocharging parents. If your group is anindependent one, work out the costsinvolved and decide how you are going tomeet them. For example, you may decideto apply for local grants. Decide what yourcharging policy will be; some groups leavea bowl out for donations, others have afixed charge.

If you open a bank account and keeprecords of the money coming in and out,you should have two signatories. If youhave a Management Committee, keepthem informed as to how the money is used.

If a parent or carer genuinely can’t pay,don’t penalise them. What you do if

someone won’t pay is at yourdiscretion. You could explain to

them what the fee covers(such as room hire,

refreshments, insurance,purchase of good qualitytoys). Explain that thefee is not for profit;any money left overwill be ploughedback into making thegroup even better. If someone stillrefuses to pay, it islegitimate to consider

refusing them a placein the group.

InsuranceYour group must have insurance cover incase an adult or child is hurt. Check withyour own organisation about the nature ofthe cover automatically provided forgroups running under their auspices, andassess whether this cover is appropriate.

If you are running an independent group,check whether the building in which youmeet has its own insurance – it is likely thatyou will be covered if you meet in churchpremises, for example. If not, there areinsurance policies available for parent andtoddler groups which can also cover theft.Keep an inventory of what you have andwhat it costs to replace the items listed.

If you are planning trips away from thepremises, the leader should take positivesteps to promote safety and ensureproper precautions are taken to preventaccidents. Particular thought should begiven to additional insurance and childprotection procedures.

Child protection/health and safetyThese vital subjects have been given theirown sections on pages 17-21.

On the dayOpen up and prepareKeys may need to be collected from andreturned to the owner or caretaker of yourpremises; ensure you know whoseresponsibility this is each week. Arrive ingood time to set out the toys and checkroom safety.

Team numbersMake sure there are enough teammembers to cover all necessary jobs –including making the refreshments.

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RegisterIt is essential to keep track of allparents/carers and children who are on thepremises at any group meeting. Anominated team member should beavailable to take the register, and if anyoneleaves during the session, this also shouldbe noted in the register. In the event of afire, the nominated person can thenreliably inform the fire service of anypeople left in the building.

Number limitThere are no fixed rules about how manyadults or children can attend. The numberwill be determined by the number of

volunteers available to assist, the size of thespace available, and how many childrenyou judge can play safely with the toys thatyou provide. Take advice from your localFire Officer if you are in doubt. In areas of high demand, group leaderssometimes enrol parents/carers in advance,and start a waiting list. Experience hasshown that usual attendance is around70% of those that enrol.

The group leader is responsible fordeciding the maximum number that can besafely accommodated, and for (tactfully!)turning away anyone who arrives after thatmaximum number has been reached.

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Remember!• Prepare a registration form• Keep a record of medical conditions,

allergies etc• Use an accident book and incident book• Manage your money• Put in place relevant insurance• Open up and prepare the room• Have enough people on the team• Keep a register• Decide and implement number limit

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It is vital that all parent andtoddler groups have an up-to-date child protectionpolicy in place. The notes onthis page do not constitute achild protection policy butserve to emphasise the needto have one.

Everyone concerned in any activity thatinvolves children (irrespective of whethertheir parents or carers are present) mustadhere to an up-to-date child protectionpolicy. All team members need to receivetraining in child protection issues, have acopy of the policy, and agree to implementit. Child protection policies should bereviewed annually.

This is for the safety and protection of thechildren – and for your own protection as a team.

Written information should be given toparents and carers, telling them about thepolicy and the specific measures taken toensure the safety of the children. A copy ofthe child protection policy should bedisplayed clearly while your group is insession.

For details of Mothers’ Union diocesanchild protection policies andprocedures, contact your diocesantrustee group or MU staff at MarySumner House. See page 24 forcontact details.

Salvation Army groups should adhere tothe Safe and Sound policy. See page 24for contact details.

If you are running an independentgroup and have no child protectionpolicy, several agencies offer freeadvice. The Churches Child ProtectionAdvisory Service offers outline policieswhich can be adapted to meet theneeds of specific activities. See page 25for contact details.

All policies will include guidelines about theselection process of volunteers who willcome into direct contact with children. Animportant part of this process is to ensurethat they do not have a record of childabuse, or other serious criminal offence,which would make it inappropriate forthem to work in this environment.

Applications for these checks have to besubmitted to the Criminal Records Bureau(CRB), the government agency set up toadminister the scheme, through aregistered body. The result of each checkis called a ‘disclosure’. Your childprotection policy will include details ofhow to assess each voluntary role in orderto determine which should be subject tothese checks.

Other important issues which childprotection policies should cover include:

Arrangements for ongoing supportstructures for volunteers.

Practical procedures for keepingchildren safe.

Definitions of the different types ofabuse.

Information about signs and symptomsof abuse.

Having a child protectionpolicy in operation willhelp to safeguard themost vulnerable insociety – the under fives,too small to protectthemselves.

David Pearson,Executive Director,The Churches ChildProtection AdvisoryService

Keeping children safe: child protection issues

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Instructions about what to do if abuse is suspected or reported, including thename of the person to contact ifspecialist advice is needed.

Children with special needs.

Sometimes urgent and immediate action isrequired. In that case, those present shoulddo what they can to protect the child, andshould themselves contact the area SocialServices Child Protection Team or thePolice Child Protection Team. As soon aspossible afterwards they should inform theperson named in their policy as theircontact in regard to concerns relating tochild protection issues.

At parent and toddler groups,parents/carers are the primary care-giversfor their children while at the group. It isimportant that they understand this. Nappychanges and supervising children’s visits to

the toilet should be undertaken by thechild’s own parent or carer.

The taking and use of photographs in yourgroup needs to comply with the DataProtection Act. Parent and toddler groupsmust have written permission from theparents/carers of the children (even if thereare 35 children in one photograph) to saythat they are happy with the photographsbeing used. In the agreement letter youshould set out where and when thephotographs will be used – for example ina newsletter, on a website, on a flyeradvertising your group.

Because parents/carers are the primarycarers, parent and toddler groups are not required by law to have anyinvolvement with Social Services, but it ishelpful to maintain a good relationship withthem and keep them informed of yourgroup’s activities.

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Remember!• Adhere to an up-to-date child protection policy• Protect the children in your care –

as well as yourself and your team• Team members should be trained in

child protection issues• Review your policy annually • Provide parents/carers with written

information about your policy• Display the policy while the group is in session• Obtain permission before taking or using

photographs• It is ESSENTIAL that these safeguards are put in place

Fire safetyInvite your local Fire Officer to visit theplace where your group meets. This mightbe the manager of the building you use foryour group. S/he will be up to date withfire safety regulations, and will be able togive instruction about fire exits and how topractice a fire drill. The Fire Officer will alsocheck the fire extinguishers in the buildingare of the correct type and in goodworking order. All fire extinguishers mustbe regularly maintained.

Make sure parents know who on your teamis responsible in the event of an emergency.This would usually be the group leader andin their absence, their deputy.

On page 27 you will find spaces to writedetails of your local emergency telephonenumbers. Make it a priority to fill them in.

First aid A well-stocked first aid box is essential andshould be accessible but out of the reach ofchildren. As a guide, a basic box shouldinclude the following items, and should berestocked regularly:

A leaflet giving general guidance on firstaid (eg Health Service Executive leafletBasic Advice on First Aid at Work).

20 individually-wrapped sterile adhesivedressings (assorted sizes).

2 sterile eye pads.

4 individually-wrapped sterile triangularbandages.

6 safety pins.

6 12cm x 12cm individually-wrappedsterile unmedicated wound dressings.

2 18cm x 18cm individually-wrappedsterile unmedicated wound dressings.

1 pair disposable gloves.

You should not keep tablets or medicinesin the first aid box.

At least one qualified first aider must beavailable at each session. Contact St JohnAmbulance for details of first aid courses inyour area (see page 26 for details).

Keep at hand a list of telephone numbersof local doctors and hospitals. You shouldbe within reach of a telephone in case ofemergency. If you are in a building that hasa phone system you may have to dial 9 foran outside line (9-999 in emergency). If atelephone is not available, make suresomeone has a mobile phone, or knowswhere to find the nearest public phone.

Venue safety and securityCheck the room you use before eachsession, making sure previous users haveleft nothing unsafe behind.

Find a secure place for buggies and prams.Leaving them in the entrance hallscompromises security and blocks the exit inthe event of emergency. You may need toinvest in some bicycle locks if you areunable to shut them away.

Doors should never be dead-locked incase of an emergency.

Safety covers should be plugged into allsockets. If you have heaters, use fireguards; if you have stairs, use stair-gates. Ifthere is no door between the kitchen andmeeting room, use a stair-gate to preventchildren gaining access.

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Health and safety issues

‘‘’’

The parent and toddlergroup was a life-saver. Itwas the only real outlet Ihad to meet with otherpeople in the sameposition as me. I madesome good friends there.

Anne

Hygiene All toilets and nappy changing areas need to be checked for cleanliness. All cleaningproducts must be kept in a lockedcupboard.

If there is not a facility to dispose ofnappies safely, ask parents and carers totake them home for disposal. Ideally,disposable nappies should be burned, orput into two bags and tied securely,before disposing of them.

Equipment and toysWhen buying toys, ensure they all carry therelevant symbols of safety and quality. Lookfor one or more of the following symbols:

Consider how the equipment you buy willfit into the space available. The layout ofthe equipment is important and carefulconsideration should be given to:

Having a safe area for babies.

Adequate storage.

The importance of children being visibleat all times (such as the use of transparent playhouses).

Care should be taken that fingers are nottrapped when children are using sit andride toys.

Toys should be regularly checked,maintained and cleaned. Broken toysshould be disposed of immediately.

Discourage gifts of second-hand toys andcheck the safety of toys children bring infrom home.

Toys provided should be appropriate to thedifferent age groups and varying stages ofchild development. Your local EarlyLearning Centre should give 10 per centdiscount to parent and toddler groupleaders; proof of charitable status isrequired. See page 27 for details.

The following list of suggested toys andequipment will encourage physical,intellectual, emotional and socialdevelopment. Don’t be discouraged by thelength of the list; start with a small numberof good quality items.

For babies under 12 months:Baby chairsRattlesSoft toysMobilesMusical instruments eg bells, shakers,tambourines

For toddlers aged 12 – 24 months:BooksPaper and colouring pencilsBuilding blocksToy buggiesWheelie toys Sit and ride toysProtective sheets for painting and play dough areaPainting overallsFinger paints (non-toxic)Climbing frame with safety matCushions/beanbags for readingcorner/puzzle areaWooden jigsaw puzzles

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CE mark

Lion Mark

BATR mark

‘‘’’

We had a great timewhen a fire-fightercame to do a fire safetytalk. He came in hisuniform – the childrenloved it. It was great forthe carers too!

Linda, team member

For children aged 2-3 years:Construction toys eg Sticklebricks,DuploDolls’ house, garageWheelie toys and bikesPlayhouseGlue stick for craft activities

21

Remember!• Put fire safety precautions in place• Fill in local emergency numbers• Keep an up-to-date first aid box • Have a qualified first-aider at all sessions• Be near a telephone• Check safety of the room before all sessions• Keep buggies secure and away from entrance• Maintain cleanliness and lock up cleaning

equipment• Use stairgates and fireguards• Dispose of nappies with care• Buy toys with safety symbols• Clean and check toys regularly• Provide a safe area for babies• Keep children in sight at all times

Be inclusiveMany groups have now moved away fromthe name ‘Mothers and Toddlers’, but thename ‘Parent and Toddler’ is still not atotally inclusive title. State clearly in all yourliterature that everyone is welcome –mums, dads, grandparents and carers. Alladult carers are in a parental role whenthey are at the group. However, if you arerunning an ‘exclusive’ group – a group forsingle mums under eighteen, for example –clearly state this.

Mention in your literature that the group isalso for babies, and is appropriate forchildren up to school age (although usuallychildren leave at three years to go toplaygroup or nursery school).

If you are a faith-based group you shouldmake that clear, but explain that youextend a welcome to people from differentreligious backgrounds and ethnic groups.Ensure people with disabilities know theyare welcome. But do make it clear ifwheelchair access is not available in thebuilding you use. Any concerns you haveabout accessibility should be referred tothe owner of the premises you use.

Some groups choose to call themselves bya different name (such as Stepping Stones,Sparklers, Busy Bees, Tiddlers). Thesenames are chosen in an attempt toemphasise that the group is not exclusivelyfor parents and toddlers, and also toengage children and build in an identity tothe group.

Group charterOn page 30 you will find a photocopiablesheet entitled The Parent and Toddler GroupCharter. This sets out the aims of a group,and shows that you endeavour forexcellence in all that you do. Display a

copy on the wall of your venue – thisdeclared intention will motivate you andyour team to offer the best service you canat all times.

Welcome letterPrepare a welcome letter or introductoryleaflet. Make it friendly and informative,keeping in mind that it is for new memberson their first visit, so it should cover all thebasic information they need to know.Include, for example:

The days and times of opening.

Any changes in meeting times duringschool holidays.

Contact name and telephone numberof group leader.

Health and safety issues such as areasallocated for pushchairs.

An explanation of how parents/carers canpass on comments or complaints to youand the team. Let them know “this is yourgroup and we welcome your input”.

Parental agreementAs part of your welcome letter, or as aseparate leaflet, set out parents’/carers’responsibilities. Your letter could read, for example:

It is important that every member of thegroup feels relaxed, supported, safe andsecure – and has fun – while they are here.May we remind you that when youregister each week you are agreeing tofollow a few simple ground rules that willhelp us enjoy our time together:

Your child’s safety, the way s/he relatesto and plays with other children, are

Communicating with your group and your community

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‘‘’’

One of the healthvisitors in the townrecommends our groupto new mums, especiallythose who are a bit low.People come herebecause it makes such adifference to their lives.Sharon

your responsibility. So if s/he’s about tothrow a brick – intervene!

If another parent expresses concernabout an action of yours or your child’s,listen graciously. Explore each other’spoint of view, even if you don’t agree,or feel you have been misunderstood.Stay friends!

Appreciate the team members who arehere to organise and facilitate thegroup, but who are also part of ourgroup family.

Look after, and encourage your childrento look after, the room, the equipmentand each other, and take care withdrinks, buggies and belongings.

Above all – have fun and enjoy beingtogether!

See page 31 for a sample combinedwelcome letter and agreement; you couldadapt this to suit your group.

NewsletterYou might like to produce an occasionalnewsletter which could provide more

‘ongoing’ information and which could bedistributed via doctors’ surgeries, playgroupsand libraries. In addition to the essentialstandard information included in thewelcome letter, it could include details of:

Parenting courses or other activities thatyou run or can recommend.

Fund-raising events, summer outingsand Christmas parties.

Where and when the group meets,what it costs and who can come, writtenin the languages spoken in the area.

Get recommendations You could arrange to meet with localHealth Visitors or the National ChildbirthTrust (NCT) in order to getrecommendations. People more readilychoose services when they arerecommended by people they respect. Thiscould be a more effective way to advertiseyour group than handing out leaflets.

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‘‘’’

Not surprisingly, I was ina minority as the onlydad. I actually felt veryspecial. The childrenloved having a manaround.

Dave

Remember!• Make sure EVERYONE knows they are

welcome• State clearly if you run an ‘exclusive’ group• Display the Parent and Toddler Group

Charter• Write a welcome letter• Prepare a parental agreement• Produce a newsletter• Get recommendations

Through your parent and toddlergroup, you are already helpingmany of your group membersmore than you will know. Youmay be inspired to take yoursupport one step further – suchas offering parenting groups orother activities, or locatingsources of help for families withparticular needs.

All three organisations that have producedThe Good Practice Guide for Parent andToddler Groups have resources and supportnetworks offering further help.

Care for the FamilyGarth House, Leon Avenue,Taffs Well, CardiffCF15 7YYTel: 029 2081 0800Fax: 029 2081 4089Email: Playtime@cff.org.ukWeb: www.careforthefamily.org.ukRegistered charity no: 1066905

Care for the Family produces a free emailnewsletter for leaders of parent andtoddler groups, providing encouragementand an opportunity to share ideas andinspiration. Other activities include family-building breaks for helping parents and theirchildren to grow closer, special networksfor single parent families and those whohave suffered the loss of a child.

The Mothers’ Union24 Tufton StreetLondonSW1P 3RBTel: 020 7222 5533Fax: 020 7222 1591Email: mu@themothersunion.orgWeb: www.themothersunion.orgRegistered charity no: 240531

The Mothers’ Union promotes the well-being of families worldwide through theprovision of practical projects establishedby volunteers within local communities. Inthe UK and Ireland, the MU facilitates anational network of parenting groups,provides a range of support for families andproduces resources on issues important toparents. To register for a free copy of theMU’s email newsletter, visit our website.

The Salvation Army Adult and Family Ministries Unit101 Newington CausewayLondon SE1 6BNTel: 020 7367 4956Fax: 020 7367 4711Email: afm@salvationarmy.org.ukWeb: www.salvationarmy.org.ukRegistered charity no: 214779

The Salvation Army provides a number ofspecialised services including FamilyTracing, Marriage Guidance, ResidentialFamily Centres for families at risk andCommunity Homes offering professionalchild care. Many Salvation Army Corps(Churches) have a community outreachprogramme giving practical support andassistance to families, plus a wide range ofactivities across the age spectrum.Arrangements can be made for infants tobe dedicated (christened).

Further support for families

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Criminal Records BureauPO Box 110LiverpoolL3 6ZZInformation line: 0870 90 90 811Registration application line: 0870 90 90 822Application line: 0870 90 90 844Minicom: 0870 90 90 344Web: www.disclosure.gov.uk

NSPCCWeston House42 Curtain RoadLondonEC2A 3NHTel: 020 7825 2500Fax: 020 7825 2525Email: infounit@nspcc.org.ukWeb: www.nspcc.org.uk

Churches Child Protection AdvisoryService (CCPAS)PO Box 133SwanleyKent BR8 7UQTel: 0845 120 4550Fax: 0845 120 4552Helpline: 0845 120 4551Email: info@ccpas.co.ukWeb: www.childprotection.info

Produces Guidance for Churches, acomprehensive guide to child protectionissues which includes model policies,sample forms and contracts and helpfulbest practice guidelines. CCPAS review andcomment on draft child protection policies,offer training throughout the UKand operate a 24 hour seven day helpline.

Useful contacts and resources

25

Child protection

Pre-School Learning AllianceNational Centre69 Kings Cross RoadLondon WC1X 9LLTel: 020 7833 0991Fax: 020 7837 4942Email: pla@pre-school.org.ukWeb: www.pre-school.org.uk

St John AmbulanceNational Headquarters27 St. John’s LaneLondon EC1M 4BUTel: 08700 10 49 50Fax: 08700 10 40 65Web: www.sja.org.uk

TiddlywinksScripture Union Mail OrderPO Box 5148Milton Keynes MLOMK2 2YXTel: 01908 856006Fax: 01908 856020Email: mailorder@scriptureunion.org.ukWeb: www.scriptureunion.org.ukDescribed as ‘the flexible resource for pre-school children and carers’, the Tiddlywinksbooks offer a user-friendly, fun introductionto Bible stories

WHSmith Retail LtdFREEPOST (sce4410)SwindonWiltsSN3 3XSTel: 0870 444 6444Email: customer.relations@whsmith.co.ukWeb: www.whsmith.co.uk

Parentalk115 Southwark Bridge RoadLondonSE1 0AXTel: 020 7450 9073Fax: 020 7450 9060ISDN: 020 7378 6593Email: info@parentalk.co.ukWeb: www.parentalk.co.ukProduces an eight-session course forparents who want to share theirexperiences, learn from each other anddiscover some principles of parenting.

Family Caring Trust8 Ashtree Enterprise ParkNewryCo DownNorthern IrelandBT34 1BYTel: 028 3026 4174Fax: 028 3026 9077Email: office@familycaring.co.ukWeb: www.familycaring.co.ukProduces a seven-session course forparents of children up to the age of six,aiming to enable parents to become moreconfident and learn new skills.

Positive Parenting Publications2a South StreetGosport HantsPO12 1ESTel: 023 9252 8787 Fax: 023 9250 1111Email: info@parenting.org.ukWeb: www.parenting.org.ukProduces a five-week course designed tobuild parents’ confidence.

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27

NSPCC(address as page 25)Produces a course for parents of childrenaged 2-7, enabling parents to find positiveways of managing children’s behaviour.

One Parent Families255 Kentish Town RoadLondonNW5 2LXTel: 020 7428 5400Fax: 020 7482 4851Email: info@oneparentfamilies.org.ukWeb: www.oneparentfamilies.org.ukMembership of this supportive organisationis free of charge for single parents.

Parentline Plus520 Highgate Studios53-76 Highgate RoadKentish TownLondonNW5 1TLHelpline: 0808 800 2222Email: centraloffice@parentlineplus.org.ukWeb: www.parentlineplus.org.ukProvides freephone helpline and parentingcourses via the Parent Network Service.Also includes the National StepfamilyAssociation.

Contact-A-Family209-211 City RoadLondonEC1V 1JNHelpline: 0808 808 3555Tel: 020 7608 8700Fax: 020 7608 8701Email: info@cafamily.org.ukWeb: www.cafamily.org.ukBrings together families whose childrenhave disabilities.

REGIONAL ADDRESSES You may find it helpful to record your ownlocal phone numbers

Police:

Fire Station:

Accident and Emergency:

Early Learning Centre: HQ: 01793 831300

Local number:

Sample handouts and forms

These can be photocopied/adapted for your own use

The Parent and Toddler Group CharterWe aim to:

Welcome EveryoneGive a warm welcome to everyone, whatever their age,relationship to the child, culture, religious background,colour, gender or disability.

Be ExcellentShow excellence in all that is done in our group, frommaking the coffee to comforting a person in distress. At alltimes we try to maintain our high standards.

Provide a Safe and Happy EnvironmentOffer a safe and happy environment for the team to workwith parents, carers and children.

Care for our TeamValue, encourage and care for every member of the team.

Offer FriendshipOffer true friendship to everyone who comes to our groupand to create an environment where friendships can bemade among our group members.

Involve Parents and CarersEncourage parents and carers to assist and participate so thatthey will feel they are an essential part of the group.

30

Dear Fiona

We’re really pleased you’ve joined St John’s parent and toddler group!

I’m Jenny Smith, your group leader, and together with the rest of the team I would like to

welcome you. We’ll do all we can to help you feel part of our happy group.

For your information, we are open on Tuesdays and Thursdays between 9.30am and 11.30am.

Please note that we run our group during school term time only.

We like to keep the entrance hall free for everyone’s safety. Please leave your prams, buggies or

other large items in the room on the right hand side of the hall when you arrive. There is an

additional fire exit at the end of the hall: this is only for use in emergency, so please do not leave

by that exit.

It is important that every member of the group feels relaxed, supported, safe and secure – and has

fun – while they are here. For that reason we have a maximum number limit of 50 adults and

children; as group leader I am responsible for ensuring that we do not go over the maximum. For

the same reason, may we remind you that when you register each week you are agreeing to

follow a few simple ground rules that will help us enjoy our time together:

• Your child’s safety, the way s/he relates to and plays with other children, are your responsibility. So if

s/he’s about to throw a brick – intervene!

• If another parent expresses concern about an action of yours or your child’s, listen graciously.

Explore each other’s point of view, even if you don’t agree, or feel you have been misunderstood.

Stay friends!

• Appreciate the team members who are here to organise and facilitate the group, but who are also

part of our group family.

• Look after, and encourage your children to look after, the room, the equipment and each other, and

take care with drinks, buggies and belongings.

We do value your comments on the group, and would also like to know if you have any concerns

or suggestions about how we can do things differently. Please let me – or any of the team

members – have your feedback. This is your group and we always welcome your input.

We also welcome any questions you have about St John’s Church – our parent and toddler group

is run by members of the church. From time to time we run parenting courses and discussion

evenings. You are very welcome to join us.

Above all – have fun and enjoy being together!

Jenny Smith Group leader

PS If you need to speak to me outside group hours, feel free to call me on ...

Sample welcome letter/parental agreement

31

Sample registration formParent/carer name:

Child’s name:

Child’s age:

Child’s date of birth:

Contact address:

Postcode:

Contact telephone number:

Registration date:

Medical conditions(eg allergies, asthma)

Special needs:

Signature of parent/carer

Date

Data protection declaration: A statement should be made on the form about how the informationsupplied on it will be stored and used and who will have access to it. The person completing the formmust be asked to give their written consent for the information to be used in the ways indicated. Theinformation supplied must not be used for any purpose other than those stipulated. For further advice,contact your organisation.

Please note: Salvation Army groups are required to use the official Salvation Army Data ProtectionNotice on all registration forms.

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Sample weekly attendance recordTeam member Visitor Parent/carer Child Date Date Date

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Notes

The Good Practice Guide has beenproduced for parent and toddler group leaders and teams.

It includes information about setting up and running parentinggroups, covering issues such as:

Basic procedures for running a successful groupPutting into place a child protection policyFinding new ways of communicating with the groupThe range of equipment needed for childrenCreating a safe and secure venue How to plan a group sessionWhere to find further support for families

It will help parent and toddler group leadersand team members to:

Support each other in their workAffirm the members of their groupCreate a welcoming environmentProvide the opportunity to make real friendshipsOffer a happy learning place for childrenMake a difference in their communityBe as excellent as they possibly can be

Parent and toddler groups can be the only adultcompany that many parents and carers have duringthe week. Because of this, the group has a great

impact on their lives; probably more than most groupleaders can imagine! Diane Louise Jordan