Organs of the BodyOrgans of the Body

Who is to become the President of the Concert of Organs?

Concert of organs 1Concert of organs 1

Concert of organs 1Concert of organs 1

Mr Renal Kidney Mr Cardiac Heart Mr Intestinal Intestine

Mr Splenic Spleen Mr Cerebral Brain Mr Hepatic Liver

LiverLiverI am number 1 in the human body. Without me, a man cannot live. I watch over the metabolism of the body, removing waste and synthesizing very many enzymes and peptide products. Without me a man will go crazy in the condition called hepatic encephalopathy.What can man do without me? If I am diseased, a man has to get a replacement of me through transplantation of organ which is very scarce. Perhaps, the new method of cloning will make me more easily available. But who wants to be available. Only cheap things can be available at all times! But watch it! Even when I am available for transplantation,I still make sure I get rejected by the host, suggesting I should be the President of the concert of organs. I hereby nominate myself forthis important post.

KidneyKidneyI should be the President of the concert of organs. I take care of excretion in the entire human body. Without me, urea, creatinine and other waste products of metabolism will accumulate and the man will die. When urea accumulates in the body because I am not available, the individual cannot have any rest. The condition is called hyperuricaemia and it is very debilitating. No wonder people seek me out in organ transplantation when I am diseased. But I am very generous, because I am bilateral. If one of me is diseased, the other can take over, although I still make sure I exercise my control over the whole body by causing hypertension if the diseased side of me is not removed immediately. My hypertension is more devastating than that of the heart itself, suggesting I am more important than the heart. Vote me in as the President of the concert of organs.

SpleenSpleenI should be the President of the concert of organs. I am the largest lymphatic organ of the body. When I am removed, a man becomes more susceptible to certain infections, of which pneumococcal one is the commonest. I am therefore very vital to sicklers, although they do not realise my value and therefore destroy me in the process known as autoinfarction very early in their lifes. Those who have attempted to remove me in the condition like hypersplenism, when I cause anemia, have regretted their folly. Do not forget that most humoral antibodies are generated inside me, and I am very useful for the production of monoclonal antibodies.

IntestineIntestineDo not be deceived. Those who are talking are talking out of stupidity. Who feeds them all? I do!. Without me they cannot eat and they will therefore all die. Who is Mr Brain to complain. Can he survive even 5 minutes without oxygen or glucose? No! How about Mr Heart who says he is very important for emotional activity and circulation. Can he pump blood without food? If I refuse to digest the food, can they all eat? They seem also all to be obsessed with Transplantation of organs. Who can transplant me? Nobody. I therefore conclude my short speech. No one else is more important Than Mr Intestine. I am the most qualified to be Mr President.

HeartHeartI am Mr Heart. I pump body around the whole body and circulate the food. Mr Intestine has just finished talking a lot of rubbish. Without me, can the food he says he provides go round even to he himself? Can he eat the food directly without me?NO. No one can take food without me circulating and bringing the food to his door step and hence no one is more important than Mr Heart. Contrary to popular opinion, I am not interested in emotions, or love. Cupid has nothing to do with me. Cupid should find his friend in the brain,who is also the weakling interested in emotions. I am very masculine; I do not weep. I do my duty of circulating bloodwithout any fuss. I am therefore the most qualified to be the President of the concert of organs. Artificial hearts are being produced, but no one has seen any of them perform for 70 years like I do. The day I pack up is the doomsday of a man.

BrainBrainOf course I am the President of the concert of organs. Anyone should know that. To prove this, I shall talk very little and perform my act. I shall withdraw all my services from all the organs here present and see if they can perform like President. If they can, I will give up my claim to presidency. All I need to do is provide no more personality, and the heart itself may go on functioning but forwho? When a man is certified dead, I am the one that is dead. If I am still alive, a man cannot be said to be dead. That is to say I decide whodies,and not the heart or liver or intestine. I cannot be transplanted, nor replaced nor changed. I am self sufficient! I am the person, the personality, the individual and the man; i am that i am.

Now VOTE!Now VOTE!

NO, WAIT A SECOND

Concert of organs 2Concert of organs 2

Concert of organs 2Concert of organs 2

Mrs Clitoral Clitoris Mrs Uterine Womb Mr Pulmonary Lung

Mr Penile Penis

LungsLungs

I have been relegated to the secondary position by my colleagues. I am now to take part with women . Imagine someone as important as me being placed in the same group as Mrs Clitoris who has no function. She is removed daily in the process of female circumcision. What a pity. Yet without me no one can breath oxygen or live on planet earth. I am the Father of all!

UterusUterusI am the womb, the mother of all creatures. I am a woman. And the Queen of the earth. Who can be more important than me? Anyone who has not tasted of my motherly care should take over as President.There is no man living on earth who has not been nourished by me.Even the so- called test tube babies pass through me and are not nourished in the test tube more than 48 hours at most. I do not intend to be President of the concert of organs. I am the mother of all of them! No one has been able to design an artificial uterus,despite its importance. This is because I am so complex. I produce small and minute hormones and even big ones. I am equal to the brain in the function of regulating my environment in the function of the placenta which anchors inside me. I m the greatest!

ClitorisClitorisI am Mrs Clitoris. Many think I am not important, but I wish to convince you all that I am more important than all the organs that have come before me. Firstly, I am the whole essence of sexual intercourse and activity. Without me, there can be no real sexual intercourse. It then become animalistic. Without proper sexual activity, women find it difficult to get pregnant. They do not even like to get pregnant without me or without enjoying sexual activity or romance. Without proper sexual activity there can therefore be no good marital harmony and no love in the home. Without love there can be no home. Without home there can be no shelter. Without shelter there can be no succour. We can go on and no but I will stop here. Those who remove me in the process known as female circumcision are in serious error. A man whose mother has no clitoris is not a man but an animal!

PenisPenis

I am the very king of all. I am stronger than any organ and even as strong as bone. I cause pain, pleasure, joy and sadness. Without me, there can be no babies, either test tube or other wise. I am a strong tower and pillar to lie on. I am the rock of Gilbraltar. I can cause evil, or pain. But sadly, I am always controlled by the clitoris and the vagina. Those two organs make me weak. Perhaps I am no good as President of the Concert of Organs after all. For although I appear very strong, I am actually a weakling!.

Disqualification NoticeDisqualification Notice

Mr Penis has been disqualified

The endThe end