Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

1

On the menu of a New Orleans restaurant:

“Blackened bluefish”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

2

In a Maine restaurant:

“Open seven days a week and weekends”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

3

On an established New Mexico dry cleaning store:

“Thirty-eight years on the same spot.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

4

On a New York convalescent home:

“For the sick and tired of the

Episcopal Church”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

5

Outside a country shop in West Virginia:

“We buy junk and sell antiques.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

6

In a Tacoma, Washington men’s clothing store:

“15 men’s wool suits - $100

They won’t last an hour!”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

7

A sign seen on a restroom dryer at O’Hare Field in Chicago:

“Do not activate with wet hands.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

8

In a New York restaurant:

“Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the

manager.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

9

In the offices of a New Jersey loan company:

“Ask about our plans for owning your

home.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

10

In the window of an Oregon general store:

“Why go elsewhere to be cheated, when

you can come here?”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

11

In downtown Boston:

“Callahan Tunnel - NO END”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

12

On a Tennessee highway:

“Take notice: when this sign is under water, this road is

impassable.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

13

On the grounds of a private school in Connecticut:

“No trespassing without permission”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

14

In a New York medical building:

“Mental Health Prevention Center”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

15

In a Florida maternity ward:

“No children allowed”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

16

In front of a New Hampshire car wash:

“If you can’t read this, it’s time to wash your

car.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

17

In a Los Angeles clothing store:

“Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and

17 necks.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

18

On a California freeway:

“Fine for littering”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

19

In the window of an Atlanta clothing store:

“Sid’s Pants is Open”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

20

On the wall of a British Columbia cleaning service:

“Able to Do the Worst Possible Job”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

21

In a New York jewelry store:

“Genuine Faux Pearls”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

22

In a Kansas City oculist’s office:

“Broken lenses duplicated here”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

23

In a Boston fast-food parking lot:

“Parking for Drive-Through Customers

Only”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

24

Billboard on Florida highway:

“If you can’t read, we can help”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

25

On the Triborough Bridge in New York:

“In Event of Air Attack Drive Off Bridge”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

26

On a Lockhart, Texas gas station and minimart:

“We’re out of Rolaids,but we’ve got gas.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

27

At the basketball court in a Gastonon, North Carolina YMCA:

“Anyone caught hanging from the rim will be suspended.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

28

On a Rapid City store:

“Give That Bride a Good Case of

Worms or Other Fine Bait”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

29

On the door of an Ellsworth, Maine, restaurant:

“The Indian Trading Post will be closed

for Yom Kippur”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

30

In a Grand Rapids restaurant:

“Half baked chicken”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

31

In a Dayton barbershop:

“During vacation of owner, a competent

hair stylist will be here.”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

32

On a Jacksonville, Florida bookstore:

“Rare, out-of-print, and nonexistent

books”

Signs that don’t quite give the

intended message.

33

On a library in Marlboro, New Hampshire, honoring Robert Frost:

“Frost Free Library”