october 1996 - binghamton review
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University J-Board Covers CrimeTRANSCRIPT
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University J-Board Covers Crime
Binghamton Review Fights For Its Right
Administration Interferes I n The Removal Of The VPMA
A Freshman's First Impression Of BU
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BINGHAMTON REVIEW Volume 10, Number 2 October 1996
Departments
3 Editoriul: Binghamton Review comes under attack by the Student Association's Financial Vice President.
Campus Presswatcb 4 12 The Right Side !t 's back and better than ever, Two pages of our
senseless and tasteless humor
23 Quibbles & Bits Someone changes their name to Ross Perot, a Senator becomes an advocate for beer
Features
5 Alex Galltsky
To Catch a Thief, Part II , Binghamton Review
fights with the University J-Board
11 Paul Torres
The administration's meddling in matters
that are not their concern
20 Nathan L. Wurtzel The multiculturalists fonn a new regime
on campus
9 Jason Kovacs
A Freshman talks about his worldly experiences
at Orientation
15 John Carney An exploration
on the demise of our educational system
Next Month -The latest developments and opinions on the Diversity requirement °An Update of the status of the student representative to BU Council -For those or you who miss it, a report on our guest speaker Erik VonKuhneltLeddine
The next issue will be available on November 1, 1996
OcroBER, 1996 ~
• • • • )a -_.' ----.~ EDITOI~IAL r; BINGHAMTON REVIEW 3
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Binghamton Review Comes Under Attack With the most conservative Student Association Executive Board in years, one would think the last
campus organization to have problems with the SA would be the Binghamton Review. But the Review is under attack by Financial Vice President Erik Kopelman. He has demanded that we put all our money in an SA account and hand over control of our money to him.
Binghamton Review is a privately funded organization. All of our funds come from private donations and paid advertisements. We do not rely on your student activity fee, making us the only independent news source on campus. The Review has chosen to be wholly independent because we do not want to be subject to the power and authority of the Student Association. Free from their control, we can focus on reporting the news as accurately as possible. The rest of the campus media does not have this privilege because they must fear the wrath of the SA, which could take away their ftmds or freeze their accounts.
There are good reasons for the campus media to fear the tyranny of the Student Association Binghamton Review was originally ftmded by the SA. In 1989, they froze our funds because they did not like a cartoon we published in the paper. Rather than cave-in to SA demands, the Review went independent
In my three years at Binghamton, two other publications have experienced the totalitarian rule of the SA. Both these incidents happened in the spring semester of 1995. The SA threatened to freeze Pipe Dream's funds because they were going to pnnt an article critical of the SA. They also froze the Coup de Tete's (now known as fair use) funds because they believed the organization had violated copyright laws. Their funds were frozen before the SA checked into the matter. Upon further investigation, the SA discovered that Coup de Tete had done nothing wrong. Yet, the SA still required them to submit their issues to the SA for prior approval before publication. It was said that this was being done to insure that there were not any more possible copyright infringements. It may only start as checking for copyright infringements, but where does it end? There is nothing to stop the SA from making editorial policy for and censoring the campus media
The SA has not bothered the campus media in a while, so I guess they figured it was about time to do it again. It seems like it is the Review's turn to be harassed by the SA. Financial Vice President Erik Kopelman already controls over a million dollars, but now he wants to control even more. He has come to the Review insisting that we put our private money in a SA account. He says because we are SA chartered the SA can be held liable for anything we print, and because of this we have to give him our money. Essentially what he is saying is that he wants to have control of what Bin8hamton Review prints.
It may be feasible for a ftmded group to have to subnut to the FVP's authority, since he is elected by the student body to oversee the ftmds generated by the activity fee, but he has no claim to the ftmds of Binghamton Review. Our funds do not come from the activity fee. They are private funds. Kopelman might as well ask me to tum over my personal checkbook. There is no difference between the two demands. People donate money to Binghamton Review so we can fight the SA's dictatorial reign over the student's at Binghamton. They do not donate money so we can submit to the SA, and allow Kopelman control over how we spend our money.
Binghamton Review does not recognize the authority of the SA over our money. Nowhere in the SA Constitution or By-Laws does it say we must give them our money. They do say that if any organizations is elligible for funding it must have an SA bank account. We have an SA account, we simply choose not to use it. A member of our staff asked Erik Kopelman to show us something in writing that says we must put our money in the hands of the SA. Kopleman has failed to show us anything that remotely suggests we must turn over our funds.
Our faithful readers and sponsors, do not fear, Binghamton Review is, and will remain, a completely independent student journal. We will not trust the SA with any of our funds. We will not submit to theIr tyrannical attempts to control us. Binghamton Review will continue to fight for our First Amendment right to freedom of the press.
Editor-In-Chief Amy L. Gardner
a.
4 BING HAMTON REVIEW .... ,. ... ~---... ~ , \\ lI'l S PRI SS\\ \I ell ~ OctOBER, 1996 -.... ... --..,...~c •...
Pipe Dream October 4th, 1996
Michael DUllckley, a freshman and SA Rep. for Rafose Hall, is eager to say and do anything to defend his beloved VPMA. His intelligence is eloquently expressed through his adroit usage of the English language ...
"Hold up America. don ' t you fucking dare tTy to silence me ... not this American boy."
Pipe Dream September 6th, 1996
Brent Landau, the Voice of Rea- should be able to supply some son describes student sentiment on comrades ... many issues ...
" In the past, students have united to protest things which they percieved as being unfair, such as budget cuts to the SUNY system, advertisements featuring holocaust revisionism .. . and the absence of a meaningful diversity reuquirement.
Editor: On that last item, whatever you say Brent ... students will not protest your abscence from the Pipe Dream.
Pipe Dream October 4th, 1996
Felipe Ayala speaks out at the recent Affirmative ActionlVPMA press conference ...
"As the revolution starts, we want soldiers, not bystanders."
Editor: Ever try calling Fidel... he
Pipe Dream September 6th, 1996
Jessica Flores calls students to take action. ..
"You as a B. U. student here have the option of running for a position on the Student Assembly. It is no surprise Anthony 's plans include dissolving this assembly. Your empowerment is still withing your grasp. Vote or run for assembly position, join a student organization, chal lenge Benardello to a public forum on his actions as SA president, attend a Binghamton Coalition meeting, interrogate the Binghamton Review, take action and voice yourself. "
Editor: Apparently students took Flores ' advice, but we don! think she is satisfied with the results so far. For one thing the Review has yetta be interrogated ..
Pipe Dream September 6th, 1996
Business as usual for our VPMA, up to an old bag of tricks ...
"Benardello alleges the woman in question is VPMA Natalie Bledman ... He says she called him a ' fucking italian guinea' . Gormly questioned a SA office staff member who witnessed the event while checking the mail.
The staff member said she overheard part of the conversation. ' What! heard her say was ' guinea bigot',' and she did not hear the curse, she said."
Editor: If "guinea bigot" is not a curse ...
Fair Use October, 1996
The socialists are back, and afier hiding behind a series of names, they have finally rested on "Fair Use ". We appreciate the friendly mention we 're given in the masthead ..
"Here's a breif synopsis of what we is ... ' Fair Use' is your psychedelic enema, whereas the Binghamton Review should be used to wrap fish."
Editor: Grammar checking time ... Fair use of "Fair Use" would entail either a birdcage, a toilet bowl, or, as suggested by "pyschedelic ", a joint. Actually, your bird might be offended ..
OcroBBR, 19% ~ ~ BING HAMTON R EV IEW 5 .••• > .... ~- --....... .....~- - .... ~ < •• •. To CCltch . .
a}j~2.9 Dealln~ with the Judicial Doard and the Duckle~ f\MendMent
by Alex Galitsky
fairs Stephen Nelson to find out
It seems impossible to get through four years at Binghamton without being
screwed by the University Administration at least once. As the real student advocate, Binghamton Review has always
provided a strong opposition to
staff member Jeff Golant, and create turmoil on campus. Then, after the April issue of the Review provided evidence on who the culprit was , large
about the scheduled University J-Board hearing. Nelson informed Wurtzel that the hearing would not take place because he
quantities of the issue were had already resolved the case. stolen. Joe Testani, a member of Nelson said that he met with
LASU, was caught red-handed Testani in early September and the University's numerous stealing issues of the Review.
criminally corrupt policies and Binghamton Review was procedures. The latest Review informed that it could not press
they reached a resolution that was ' satisfactory' from the University'S point of view. Nelson also stated that under the federal law he is not permitted to tell
investigation clearly shows how the university covers up campus
crimes. The evidence presented in this article is sufficient enough to initiate a civil law suit against the university.
To refresh the memory of
criminal charges, thus, in May, the Office of Public Safety referred the case to the Binghamton Review the outcome University 's Office of Judicial of the resolution. Affairs for its final resolution. Later that day I had a one
In mid-September former hour conversation with Stephen editor-in-chief of Binghamton Nelson. I asked him if he could
returning students and to inform Review, Nathan Wurtzel, con- describe the actions the Unifreshmen and transfers I'll tacted Director of Judicial Af- versity Judicial Office took on
briefly mention the events of the last semester that are relevant to this story. It all started last spring. Losing ground the multicultural forces of evil turned to extreme measures. First , there was a ' Memo ' containing racist, homophobic and sexist slurs which attempted to smear SA AVP and Review
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6 BING HAM ION REVIEW
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the case from the time it received there is nothing he can do. I Several days ago I contacted the repo rt from the Office of asked Nelson ,-___________ --, M i c h a e I Public Safety to the present time. if he could Nelson answered, "I followed up provide a copy on the case, and that's all I can of the Buckley tell yo u." When asked what Am-endment federal law prohibits him the so I could see release of information, Nelson in writing that stated the Federal Educational his statements Rights and Pri vacy Act of 1974, are sound. He commonly known as the Buckley searched his
Amendment. Furthermore, file but could
I am not permitted under federal law
to tell you the outcome
- Stephen Nelson
Hiestand, a staff attorney for the Student Press Law Center. He informed me that uni versities ' abuse of the Buckley Am-
Nelson made a distinction be- not find a L-___________ ---l endment is
tween the violent and non-violent crime, saying that in cases where the former occurs the Buckley Amendment would permit him to release the information. How-
copy. He told me that as soon as he finds it he will let Binghamton Review know. Three weeks later we are still waiting.
The problem is that Stephen ever, if the crime is non-violent Nelson will never find any
currently a hi-ghly debated topic nation-wide. There have been no court cases in New York State challenging the uni versi ties ' abuse of the Buckley Amendment. Ifthere were, according to Hiestand, the university would most likel y lose the case. Hiestand pointed out the recent precedent Red & Black Pub. vs . University of Georgia (1993).
Director of Judicial Affairs S tephen Nelson
supporting evidence In the Buckley Amendment that would prohi bi t him to disclose any judicial record from the public. Bing-hamton Review did extensive research on the Buckley Amendment and came to the conclusion that the
Binghamton Review care
fully analyzed this case and found many similarities between the abuse of the Buckley Amendment by the University of Georgia and Binghamton University. Red & Black, a
University is deliber- student newspaper at the ately misinterpreting University of Georgia was this federal law. The denied access to Organizational Review beli eves that Court records involving hazing Binghamton Univer- charges against two fraternities. sity uses the Buckley The University of Georgia stated Amendment to shield the same reason Stephen Nelson, criminals. i .e. Binghamton University
OcroBER, 1996 .... ~ ..... --..... ~ J-BOARD ~ B INGHAMTON REVIEW 7
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considers judicial records to be a part of educat
records , otherwise the Buckley Amendment is not applicable. Do jud
Binghamron Review Thief Joe Testani
records have any thing to do with educational
stated to Binghamton Review
the Buckley Amendment prohibits the disclosure.
records? According to the Supreme Co
urt of Georgia, the answer is NO. According to Stephen Nelson, the answer is YES.
The Supreme Court of Georgia further affirms that the purpose of the Buckley Amendment is "not to grant individual students the right of privacy or access to educational records, but to control the careless release of educational information on the part of many institutions. " If Stephen Nelson released the information about the actions of the Judicial Office, would that be considered a careless release of educational information? I don ' t think so.
In addition, the Review
found nothing in the text of the Buckley Amendm ent distinguishing the release of records of violent crimes and non-violent crimes, as stated by Stephen The Supreme Court of
Georgia ruled in favor of the student newspaper, stating that
In his letter to Binghamton Nelson. Review, Stephen Nelson writes, The student newspaper at the
"documents involving charges of "". 1 am not permitted under University of Georgia won the violations of university rules and federal law to tell you the case because the documents regulations ". were not edu- outcome ... " The Supreme Court were subject to Georgia Open cational records within meaning of the Buckley Amendment; records were not of the type the Buckley Amendment was intended to protect, that is, those relating to individual student academic performance, financial aid, or scholastic probation and were similar to records maintained solely for law enforcement purposes, whi ch were expressly excluded from Buckley Amendment's pur-
of Georgia states the following, " ... the Buckley Amendment does not prohibit disclosure of records . Rather, the Buckley Amendment provides for the withholding offederal funds for institutions that have a policy of practice of permitting the release of educational records." As one can see, the Supreme Court of Georgia states one thing, Stephen Nelson states the opposite.
Records Act and were not exempt by disclosure from the Buckley Amendment.
Al though, the purpose and application of the Buckley Amendment was interpreted by the Supreme Court of Georgia, it is highly doubtful that the Supreme Court of New York would interpret it in a different way. Otherwise, there would be a discrepancy in interpretations of the law by di fferent states
8 BING HAMTON REVIEW .... ,. ... ~---.. ~ J-BOARD r;; OcrOBER, 1996 .... ~--... ~< ••..
which would have to be settled statistics reports in accordance In other words the ones who are in the United States Supreme with the Federal Crime Aware- harmed have absolutely no say Court. Thus, under the New York ness and Campus Security Act of Freedom of Information Law 1990. However, do these reports Binghamton University must provide a true picture about release its judicial records . crimes on campus? Not neRefusal of the Administration to cessarily. Some of the campus do that is a violation of state law. crimes are handled internally by
According to the United the Judicial Affairs Office and States Student Association the never disclosed. The University research done at Southwest simply considers them a part of Missouri University found that student's educational record.
MIAMI UNIVERSITY, OHIO - Here on this idyllic campus, possession of a beer by an underage leads to automatic suspension. Yet sexual assault cases are allowed to be mediated. At worst, a student found guilty of sexual assault could get probation. For a victim of a rape, this is a bitter in campus justice. But, it gets worse. Erin R. (last name withheld) is a survivior rape in Februaury of 1995. Yet an official campus brochure sent out to 16,000 students listed zero rapes between January and June, 1995. Two other rapes were reported in February were not counted. Neither were 21 rapes reported to university agencies between January and June.(New Yorl< Times, May 5, 1996)
"about 80% of the student Where is the guarantee that newspapers surveyed had at- the incidents happening at
in the process. This is justice the Binghamton University way.
Imagine John Doe spraying your car with black paint, breaking a window in your apartment, or even worse stealing your personal belongings. Let's say John Doe gets caught. He is brought up on university judicial charges. Would you feel better now, knowing that you will never know if John Doe was ever punished for what he did? Unfortunately, this is not a fiction. This is a reality at Binghamton University.
Nathan Wurtzel speaks up for the staff of Binghamton Review, "As usual , the University is hiding behind the Buckley Amendment in an attempt to avoid dealing with crime in a responsible manner. We will continue to press this issue on behalf of not only ourselves, but for all students
tempted to gain access to campus Miami University, Ohio are not who have fallen victim to the crime reports; of those, 70% of happening here at Binghamton? University's policy of neglect. " those newspapers were denied One of the most frightening direct access to the actual cam- things about the refusal of -Alex Galitsky is a senior
pus crime reports and 30.4% records disclosure is that the majoring in history and is an
reported that Buckley Arnend- victim cannot find out the abjunct in SOM. He is ment was cited as the reason to punishmentfor the perpetrator of Distribution Manager of
deny access. " a crime, or whether the Binghamton Review. Binghamton Uni versity perpetrator was ever punished, or
releases its annual crime was even rewarded for his crime.
OctoBER, 19% ~ ~ BING HAMTON R EVIEW 9 .••• > ... ~---....... ..... -< •••.
mNGHAMTON AND THE WORtD
~ ~ElHMANT PERSPECT/~
Being a freshman is a lot like being Bob Dole; it's difficult to get respect,
and when you do, someone always brings up the age issue.
Yet, once again, I find myself as a freshman (or rather, in the politically correct lingo, first year student), this time of the college variety. For me, my biggest fear going into college was not, as you might expect, the twenty page term papers (if you're lucky), the trappings of dorm life (just try to go to sleep before 3 AM), or the food (two words for you: mystery meat). It was that college would be this place where 95% of the student body would be bed-wetting liberals, and the 5% that wasn' t would be too scared to speak out against them.
You see, in my high school, I was one of the five or six known Republicans around, so I was always one of the guys (and they were all guys, strangely enough) who had to defend the party of Abraham Lincoln, Theodore Roosevelt, Dwight Eisenhower, and Ronald Reagan. It was an arduous task, but one that I felt I was
by Jason Kovacs
up to at the high school level. So, with fears in check, a copy
of the BU Bulletin in one hand, and a two day supply of Hot Pockets in the other, I headed off to Orientation last July. After registration , my parents and I were whisked into the Nelson A. Mandela Room (Nelson A. Mandela Room?) and officially welcomed to the University. As the Orientation Advisors introduced themselves , one of their names sounded familiar, so I checked it out in my nifty little Orientation Handbook. Yup, I was right. One of the OAs was a junior named Brent Landau, who had gone to my high school back in Kingston, N.Y Back in high school, he was a well-known Student Association member who was interested in law. I guess it 's true: the more things change, the more they remain the same. Surprise, Surprise.
I met Landau four years ago at an academic competition at SUNY New Paltz called the Citizen Bee. It was similar to a Spelling Bee or Geography Bee, except that the questions all had to do with American History and Gov-
ernment. I was a twerpy little freshman (wow ... that sounds familiar) and Brent was a Junior. This also occurred during one of those several episodes when Mario Cuomo was the governor of our illustrious state, and there were rumors that President Clinton would appoint him to the Supreme Court. As a result, Cuomo's mug and an obnoxious headline were plastered on the front page of the New York Post. My father, who was reading a copy of the Post, turned to Brent's father and committed a classic social faux pas:
"Hey, this is great. Maybe this way we can get him out of New York."
Brent's father looked my dad straight in the eye and replied, "Well, there are actually some New Yorkers who like the job Cuomo's doing."
"Oh ... I see." Thus, I leamed of the Landau
Family's political persuasion. All came out well, though; in the next election, Governor Cuomo lost to a freshman state senator from Peekskill. However, Brent did beat me in the Citizen Bee. Oh well, I
IO BINGHAMTON REVIEW .~
.••• >4l1li ... --..... -:. FRESHMAN r:; OcrOBER, 1996 .... ~--..... < •••.
was only a freshman On the second day of Orienta
tion, I was wandering around the University Union looking for something to do. I started reading things that were on the floor, and I eventually came across a copy of the Binghamton Review. You can imagine my surprise after I read the Review's interview with Anthony Benardello. Here was I, freaking out all spring about going to a liberal college campus in the fall, when the new president of Student Association was basically a die-hard conservative (I've heard other adjectives describing him in the months since, but hey, let's keep it clean here). I was a bit more than shocked, to say the least. It seems like I, and the other members of the Class of 2000, have arrived here at Binghamton at an excellent time; a time when the student body has as its leaders students who are committed to bringing common sense, fiscal responsibility, and equal representation to the students of Binghamton University. Anybody for Colonial pride?
The rest of my two day jaunt toBU in July went without a hitch. On the afternoon of the first day, I struggled with my OA, trying to figure out my schedule . She helped me out quite a bit, actually. I picked out four decent classes, a host of alternates, and went back into the Mandela Room to hear a lecture about how to regi ster (oops, I mean request) classes on
this B. U.S.1. computer something of the sun before I turned into Pete or another. Yeah, like this is so Sampras, and I went home, a bit hard we need to listen to an hour- disappointed, extremely tired, but long dissertation about how to do very excited about the fall. it. Anyway, after the staff ex- After finishing up my summer, plained how to use the system, Binghamton was calling. In bethey picked a student at random tween my parents, friends , and to register his classes in front of advisors yelling at me, "GET INeveryone, to show how it's done. VOLVED" and "DON''T BLOW This Iud.), soul would not have to IT," I somehow managed to get stand in line in the blazing July sun my college career off the ground. for an hour like everyone else. As Am I excited to be here? Defiit turned out, the student who was nitely. Am I a little nervous? Abchosen at random was from my solutely. Will I still defend the conhigh school, and he didn' t decide servative cause? You better beto go to Binghamton until some- lieve it. time in early June, while poor me, who applied here Early Decision, -.fasonKovacs is afreshman mahad to wait in line to request joring in history classes for an hour. Luckily, I got
0cr0BER, 1996 ~ ~ BINGHAMTON REVIEW 11
· · · • ,. .-----~ .... -- - C···· TheVPMA
and the meddlesome adminis:tration
It is of no doubt that historically the University Administration has done nothing more
than show a tacit approval, condoning, and even encouraging such abominations as the Vice President for Multicultural Affairs. This is especially evident in recent letters written by Dr. Roger Summers and Ms. Marguerite Allington to the pipe dream. The VPMA should be an entirely student issue. The University Administration recently espoused this policy themselves, and yet their actions have yet to ring true to it.
The letter by Dr. Summers in pipe dream, on Sept 10, 1996, was aptly described as darkly threatening at points. The sentiments of Dr. Summers, and undoubtedly a good portion of the Admiiristration, on the removal of the VPMA were made clear in his letter stating, " ... two letters ... were sent to the SA president informing him that the SA is subject to all university policies and state and federal laws regarding compliance with affirmative action. These letters asked him to respond in writing how the organization will meet these requirements in light of the E-Board's ruling that the SA VPMA position 'is not valid'." There are many substantial implications present in this statement.
These letters were in part pro-
voked, according to Dr. Summer's letter, by some students: " ... several students have met with me and other University Administrators to voice their concerns and to encourage university intervention into this matter." The impetus is clear. Obviously some students are in disagreement with the removal of the SA VPMA from the E-Board because of its invalidity, but is this any justification for the Administration to intervene on the part of an obviously partisan/ideological debate within the student government? Apparently some students think so, believing that they know better than the rest of the voting majority. Perhaps, in appealing to the Administration, they believe that the Administration will come to their rescue. Should the Administration come to their rescue in any future drastic action, it will simply serve to finally prove how disgustingly partisan, and ideologically biased some of the Administration may actually be.
The other shocking implication is that supposedly the VPMA is required, by some magic trick, in order to "meet" affinnative action requirements, and other requirements mentioned in Dr. Summer's letter. The implications are clear, the SA will be guilty of violating a university policy, an affirmative action policy, and a state or a fed-
by Paul Torres
erallaw, if the SA does not act to meet these requirements in light of the removal of the VPMA.
It is not even plausible that the removal of the abomination of the VPMA, constitutes in any way shape or form a violation of state or federal law. The contention that an affinnative action or university policy has been violated is debatable, but that depends upon whether or not the VPMAis a part of such- policies, which of course is a question only the university can answer since the university determines this policy unilaterally. It would be an mtdue and flagrant intrusion by the administration upon the student government to include such an office as the VPMA as a part of its general university policy.
It was not much farther into the letter submitted by Dr. Summers that were reminded in a somewhat dark tone that "the university grants recognition to the association and acknowledges its fimction as the representative body of the students ... th~ university provides space to the association and to many of the organizations char:tered by them. This space is owned by the university, and the use of this space is solely at the pleasure of the university. To maintain its recognition, the SA must follow
12 BING HAMTON REVIEW .... ,. ... ~---.. ~ RIGIIT SIDE r;; OcroBER, 1996
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Do Any Of These Virus Concepts Ail Your Computer?
The Hilary Rodham Clinton Virus: Files disappear, only to reappear mysteriously a year later in another directory.
The Bob Dole Virus: Could be virulent, but it's been around to long to be much of at threat.
The Colin Powell Virus: Makes its presence known, but it doesn't anything. Secretly, you wish it would.
The Pat Buchanan Virus: Your system works fine, but it complains loudly about for eign software.
The Ross Perot Virus: Activates every component in your system, just before the whole thing quits.
The Bill Clinton Virus: (Sorry this is a family magazine). The Dan Quayle Virus: Their is sumthing wrung with your komputer, but ewe cant
figyour outt watt! The Congressional Virus: The computer locks up, and the screen splits in halfwith
the same message appearing on each side of the screen. The message says that the blame for gridlock is caused by the other side. -------,.
... t M~t-l ~~ C~. \<~"O~KIA~ "e:~~ ~ .
OcroBER, 19% ~ .... ~~.~--..... ~ RIGHT SID ~ BINGHAMTON REVIEW 13
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SA President Anthony Benardello, looking at an old issue Newsweek upside down, asked who the cute girl on the cover was. When he saw it rightside up,it turned out to be Hillary Clinton.
The organization formerly known as Binghamton Review is now known as Binghamton Review to be more inclusive.
Top Ten Alternative Titles For "The Voice of Reason"
1 0) Blah, Blah, Blah 9) Bear With Me 8) The Voice of a Schmuck 7)This Space For Rent 6) Here I am, Look at Me 5) Hi! I'm a Dork 4) Sour Grapes from a Sore Loser 3) The Voice of Treason 2) Will Write For Sex 1) If you think I look stupid ... Read This
14 BINGHAMTON REVIEW .••• > ... ~--.... ~ VPMA ~ OcrOBER, 1996 .... ~--..... < ••• -university policies , including those which relate to affirmative action/equal access." Describing this as darkly threatening may actually be putting it lightly; this statement was just short of an ultimatum.
It is interesting to note that there was never a word from the Administration during last year's attempts to instate the VPMA, which incidentally failed twice. Dr. Summer 's letter stated that " .. . the university would only become involved directly with the association were there to be a violation offederai or state lawor university policies. The university does not intervene if there are violations of the association's constitution, by-laws, or policies." And yet the ·resolution of the issue of the VPMA through its removal was an issue regarding a breach of the SA constitution, the university is obviously becoming involved in the affairs of the association.
The negative and only responses we have seen include such questions as " ... the question is how the Student Association Executive Board plans to comply with Binghamton University 's affirmative action/equal access policy. As the University 's compliance officer, I eagerly await the response." This statement came from Ms. Allington, Assistant to BU's president for Affirmative Action, in the September 20, issue of pipe dream. Do any other
students wonder just what this particular "compliance officer", and other administrative officers are wai ting for, or what steps will they take to enforce compliance to the supposed "guidelines" and "policies" they point out as needing some form of supposed "compliance"?
The University Administration, ifit is truly concerned with following the letter of the law, and seeing that the law is followed in the SA, has but one course of action.
•
They must remain removed from SA politics, and allow the democratic process to work on our campus.
Perhaps this is an order to tall for this administration. The last thing the administra.tion should be concerned with is how the SA will "meet" any requirements, lest it be automatically found guil ty of some supposed violations.
- Paul Torres is a sophomore in Harpur College.
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OcroBER, 1996 ~ .... ,..II----~ ~ BINGHAMTON REVIEW 15 .... ---.• -c •. ·· No Latin
Less (jree/< Lots of Diversity
by Joh,n Carney
With marches through on the Sabbath and venerate the Our youngsters now learn more the Union, a faculty- fOWlding fathers, we are said to be about Seneca Falls and Marcus led occupation of the in a crisis of old-fangled euro- Garvey than the Constitutional
administration building and. pints centrism Convention and Cotton Mather. of ink spilled in the campus pa- Exactly the opposite is true: Latin has all but disappeared pers, it almost seemed as if a di- BU students are being deprived of from our public chools, and Greek versity requirement debate went their education by the lack of fo- is gone from even the better prion at Binghamton University. But, eus on our European heritage. vate schools. At the highly touted as classicist Thomas Fleming--------------- "blue-ribbon" public school reminds us, the word "debate" Binghamton students attended by my youngest
implies two parties, and the are bei ng deprived brother, the students read no spectrum of the current discus- Hawthorne or Melville, but sions was limited to the deeper of their education. they do read the poetry of shades of pink, since neither Maya Angelou aJid Alice
~------------------~ the white flag of reaction nor the Binghamton graduates seniors Walker's The Color Purple. black flag of anarchy was raised. who know no Latin, less Greek, The grade schools are increas-
No one wants to admit that the and very little about the history of ingly dominated by the twin evils Empire State already has a these United States, to say noth- of Outcome Based Educationmulticultural diversity require- ing of the history of Europe or the which has very little to do with ment, a ''rainbow curriculum" pro- three-fold root of our civilization, education, and everything to do duced by a coercive education ca- Athens, Jerusalem, and Rome. with social engineering designed bal whose membership includes Still, someone will say, don't to produce officially sanctioned atthe New York State Board of Re- we learn all that in high school? titudes toward women, homosexugents, the teachers unions, the Sadly, our high schools are even als, and preferred minorities-and school boards in most areas, and a worse than our little university. Whole Language instructioncombination of professional edu- Years ago, history and geog- which Wendell Berry perfectly cators and bureaucrats whom the raphy gave way to social studies, described as education based on multiculturalists have either politi- which recently gave way to some- the theory that "literacy does not cized or intimidated into going thing calling itself global studies. involve knowing the meanings of along with the "diversity" agenda Rainbow curriculum standards words, or learning grammar, or
Because some BU students have corrupted the teaching of reading books." still celebrate Columbus Day, American history, forcing even ,The situation will only get watch sports played by white decenttea.cherstoexposetheirstu- worse as the Board of Regents owned teams nicknamed the dents to social history radicalized piles on new loathsome and danRedskins or the Braves, worship by the genn of multiculturalism. gerous requirements, and bad:edu-
16 B ING HAM TON R EVIEW
.••• > ... ~---.. ~ DIVERSITY ~ ~OBER, 1996 .... ~--..... < •••.
!i=-"'"- ..". .. .".. .. """-",,--= === ===========-.--.-- -----,
Visit the New SA Web Page
cation crowds out good. The clearest account of our de
cline comes from Plato, who realized that bad education undermines virtue. Before a discussion along these lines can get any further, the multiculturalists interrupt with Meno's doctrine that there are all sorts of virtues, depending on circumstances.
From the stupid faction of this crowd, we are exhorted to adopt the diversity agenda as a consequence of the Meno doctrine. "You have to deconstruct yourself, and realize that your dominant position in our hegemonic system conditions your ideology,"
http://www.sa.binghamton.edu
All groups can now obtain space on the SA Web Server, including a web page and e-mail accounts
For information on the SA Web Page, contact Mark Bloch at x6503 or email [email protected]
Deborah Cowell used to shout at opponents of the diversity requirement.
The smart faction of the multiculturalists turns away from this in embarrassment, knowing that if there are only many circumstantially relati ve virtues , then there is no essential or universal virtue, and no normative admonishment makes sense. Or, as Stanley Fish puts it, "The point is that there is no point, no yield of a positive programmatic kind to be carried away from these analyses."
The same logic multiculturalism uses to undermine the traditional hierarchy of better and
worse undermines the multiculturalists attempt to claim superiority for their agenda. And this dead end is exactly where we should expect to end up when we follow Meno's trail, shown to him by the famous rhetorician Gorgias, who argued that nothing at all exists, and ifit did we couldn' t know it, and even if we could know it, we couldn' t talk about it It is a path to nowhere and nothing. In
short, the multiculturalists want to deny the existence of an essential virtue in order to claim diversity as the overriding virtue. Butas we used to say on the Damariscotta River-you can't
Ocromm, 1996 ~ .... ,..-----~ ~ BINGHAMTON REVIEW· 17
~.---"--C .. ·· get there from here.
In their boldest moments our local liberals-whether they are professors, students, or former editors of the Binghamton Reviewscold the stupid and smart multiculturalists for violating academic freedom. If I thought it would do any good, I could explain why there is no such thing as academic freedom, and why this is a good thing too. For now it is enough to point out that academic freedom has become a convenient shield with which professors protect themselves while abandoning their students to the diversity agenda
I do not see how our liberal professors can sleep at night knowing that they teach at a uinversity requiring classes in "the nature of oppression" and "inequalities of power." Perhaps, with nights of hard drink flowing
wo~d explain the noses spotted be sure, Binghamton 1996 is a red with broken capillaries and the long way from Ithaca 1969, when cracked-windshield look of blood- several Cornell professors re-shot eyes~~ ________________ ~ ____________ _
thatmarfa- The triumph of disruptive culty faces d - I- -II· with an ra Ica Ism WI win many other~!se converts to the cause of surpnslng
frequency. chaos and violence. Comp-~--------------------------------~
liant professors must be even more signed in protest when the univerashamed when they recall that the sity administration caved-in to new diversity requirement was es- violent black radicals. tablished after the National Women's Rights Organizing Coalition stormed the meetings of the Harpur College Council, where members such as Joel Haynes promised to bring AK-47 assault rifles and other arms to campus, while coalition leader Emily Cratz urged her comrades to threaten students who refused to go along with the program.
By not standing up to the multiculturalists, the liberal professors prove correct every leftwing and right-wing critic who claims that liberalism is too soft
ca ernie ree om as ecome a convenient shield with which professors protect themselves while abandoning their students to the diversity ~genda.
to survive. To borrow another saying of Dr. Fleming's, 8lthough I have never been a liberal, I have always been prepared to accept the liberal compact of live arid let live. Let me alone to go crazy according to my own hmacy and venerate my own God, and I will let others alone with their foolish theories and theologies. Given enough time, I may even come arotDld to . respecting my fellow students and my professors. But force me to bow down before multiculturalism and study "the nature of oppression" and I will reach for my
like the river Lethe, constantly and full of forgetfulness, the horrors BU inflicts on its students slip the minds of our liberal professors. If there is truth in wine, there is consolation in whiskey, and this
The violent multiculturalist broadsword. threw respect and toleration out If the liberals have lost control the window and there demands of campus, all bets are off and we wereaccepted. Wherearethepro- are going to have to nm the unifessors who ought to be leading versity by older rules. The first the defense of the tmiversity? To thing we have to learn is that we
18 BING HAM10N REVIEW ~ ...• >. - ...... ~ DIVERSITY ~ ~OBER, 1996
...... - - .... -C ••••
cannot work within the liberal procedural system. Democracy only works among democrats, and in the wake of the diversity struggle, the system of proposing questions before parliamentaIy bodies such as the SA and the Harpur College Council is nothing more than fraud. Real power, the multiculturalists have taught us, springs from the end of bull hom, the strength of the mob and, ultimately, from the barrel of a gun.
For most, resistance will simply involve refusing to submit to the diversity requirement. Already Binghamton hosts a small under-
ground of conscientious objectors fi ce. I would not be surprised if to multiculturalism. I suspect some angry students decided to these students will not have much destroy the computer records of trouble shrugging off the offend- the university, making it imposing requirements. Simply tell aca- sible to tell who has and who has demic advising No, and they most not fi lled the diversity quota. The likely will find a way to exempt triumph of disruptive radicalism you. will win many converts to the
If the administration will not cause of chaos and violence. release resistant students from the diversity shackles and threatens to prevent them from graduating for their insubordination, some dissenters will no doubt take a page from the multiculturalist book and forcibly occupy the registrar, academic advising, or the dean 's of-
For those of us not inclined toward anarchy, the other path is the restoration of a traditional liberal education. By liberal education I do not mean the failed timorous system favored by liberals, but the muscular liberal education that dominated American colleges un-
"A. liberal is a man who is willing to spend somebody else's money"
- G utcr Glass, quolcd in the New York 7imes
A message from
Senator Thomas W. Libous
0cr0BER, 1996 ~ ..•• ,. -11----.~ r. BINGHAMTON REVIEW 19
~.---.II-C •• • • til the last turn of the century. To a great extent, our country owes it's existence to the liberal education of our founders, and a return and reconstruction must precede the rebirth of our freedom from the two-fold danger of multicultural tyranny and anarchy. This means rebuilding this university according to an architecture describing the education suitable for free men and women, the original meaning of liberal education.
We must prepare students to speak publicly about matters of urgency and permanency, and it is only prudent that we begin this task by exploring what the greatest minds have said on these matters. In short, this requires our university concentrate on the study of Greek, Latin, and mathematics.
I am sure American and British history and literature will find
a place in the new order, and there will eventually be room for the history, languages, and philosophies of Europe. These will be taught not as distinct departmental majors but as part of an integrated and coherent curriculwn. I cannot say the same for many of the other departments. Most will continue as graduate and professional schools, but undergraduates will be too busy with the difficulties of grammar, logic and rhetoric to concentrate on the specialized or vocational subjects.
This reactionary vision of the university is conservative in cleaving to tradition and order, but radical in its demand that we attempt a full accounting of ourselves and redirect our lives. Nothing less will do.
Most liberal professors assume that enough remains of the
old liberal university to make it worth preserving. They are wrong. The diversity requirement is an abonrination, and it dooms this university as we know it. Protests that there still are some good folk left at BU will not forestall the end: God's answer to Abraham was to remove him from Sodom
So we say to the decent liberal professors, you have your chance to leave this university in protest of its policies.
Better yet, you many join us. Our position is simple. We do not propose to be educated as slaves. We will not bend a knee to the multiculturalists. Not for another year, not for another day.
-John Carney is a senior major~ ing in English and PPL.
Thursdays 8:00 pm UUI03 Come and voice your opinion!
20 BINGHAMTON REVIEW ...• ,. .II----.~ ASS I
F. 0cr0IJBR, 1996 .... ---.. _-C .. ·· Multi-Cultis form New Gouernment
SH HUP dumps Ship to d~in New Hllies
T he PQlitical community at Binghamton University was (lealt a shock wave of earthquake proportions
this month as several personalities who purport to represent "underrepresented" students have announced the formation of an alternative student government The new government, which will be called the Association of Suppressed Students (ASS), is encouraging "cultural" unions and likeminded leftist student organizations to withdraw from the Stupid Associa,tion (SA) andjoin their pirate regune.
"We have been forced to do ~s~ethemUrum~has rejected our ideas," said Steven Jeffries, head of the Weird Student Union. Results of Stupid Assembly elections indicating that mUlticulturalist candidates had been sO\Uldly defeated in all communities exce~ Dickinson played anugorrolein the decision to split from the SA, Jeffries said.
''To be Latinato is to resist," added Jessie Torres, former president of Latinalo American Socialists in Solidarity with Louis Farrakhan. "We must meet this challen~e by naming away from it By fonntng ASS, we can have a subterfuge to launch Qur evil and maladjusted ideas upon the WlSUSpeeling student body." _ Torres begged off further comment, claimmg she was on her !f8.Y to interrogate members of HJBl1 Hopes in lier quest to expWlge 00-genng elements of conservatism from C8IJ..1Pus.
Anotlier individual who assisted in the formation of ASS, Fwmy Mushroom, a graduate student m the Department of Revi-
sionist History, extolled the virtues of the new multiculturalist ministry: "We have successfully constructed our own space in which to confront the systematic oppression which is institutionalized at Binahamton University. We hope to aecenter as many fellow comrades .. " mean, stu(ients, as possible so they will realize their position at the bottom of the hierarchy and join in our morious revolution. I find it ironicid that it could be otherwise."
Reaction from S~idAssociation President Anthony J. Bowlajello was surprisinJdy upbeat. "Let's face it," he saia When reached by cellular telephone at a local rifle range, "we W!ped them [the multicultUralists] off the map m the last six months. Th~ do not have the ability to work with regular ~ple, so It's completely natural that they would go off and hide rather than join with us." "Could you haftg on a second?" Bowlajello asked Muted sounds of the SA President bellowing, "PulH" emitted from the phone, followed by an earthshattering explosion.
'Thanks," he said, retwning to the cell phone. "God~ I love the Second Amendment! '
Executive Vice President Christopher Yabbadabbadoo did not share Bowlajello's optimism Commenting wllile supervising the installation of a beer tap which will be used to accommo(iate the new Greek representatives during Assembly meetings, in room 221A of the UniverSity Union, Yabbadabbadoo exj)ressed regret at the formation of the new government.
"I just wish this didn't have to
by Nathan L. Wurtzel
happen," he sighed. "I mean, I had an apolitical elections committee and eve1}1:hing. I just try to be as fair and down the center as possible."
Helping an elderly lady cross the street, Yabbadabtiadoo added that ifhe had to do it all over, he would have set aside several seats for the multicul-turalists so that they would have been represented in the Assembly despite the will of the students. .
"Oh, but I'm still opposed to affirmative action," Yabbadabbadoo concluded.
Erik Kopelperson, Financial Vice PreSident of the SA, said he was optimistic that both factions could come to a settlement soon, "We'll sit do~ )Ve'll have cake, we'll have coffee ... before you know it everything will be solved"
Perl1aps the most sllg)rising~ sponse was that of Academic Vice President Jeff Armyant, who annOWlced that he was vacating his office and joining ASS as their Vice President for Unicultural Affairs. Armyant could not be reached for comment, but close friends said that the move was precipitated by the fact thatArmyant was alw~s listed fourth among the memtiers of the SA executive board.
"Look at it from his perspective," said Dustin Graft. "Jeff wanted to be first and this was his big opportunity. This doesn't excuse tlie fact that he's a yellowbellied traitor, but at least we can understand his motive."
"Yeah." added Marx "Communist" Bloc, editor of the Stupid Advocateh"Jeff m~ be a weasel, but now a's the liead weasel. I
OcroBER, 19% .••• > .... ~---.. just hope he's happy."
Officials of ASS had no comment on Annyant's defection, but an anonymous source released a memo to Binghamton Review which explicitly details a qUid pro quo exchange of sex oetween Annyant and an unnamed ASS executJve.
Public Safety is investigating the memo, but ULED Union President Doug Chains and whips wamed not to expect a resolution "until hell freezes over," or at the very least, "until Rodger Winters is run over by a tractor trailer."
Administrative responses to the formation of ASS varied. In a press release, University President Lucy Bee Deflowered disavowed knowledge of the situation, but expressed support for the new government, stating that the University "must be a marketplace of ideas, unless the ideas are those of Anthony Bowlajello. He doesn ' t
thirik through everything he says, as opposed to Rodger Winters, my Vice President for Student Affairs . "
Winters himself was apparently caught unprepared for the situation. In an initial press release, he asserted "the entire incident resulted in a wound less than an inch long on Anthony Bowlajello." After being informed that no one had been injured as a result of the formation of the pirate government , Winters amended his statement to reflect his wish for "affirmative action now and affirmative action forever. "
"After all .. he said " lots of people have j~bs as a result of affirmative action. Lots of Vice Presidents for Student Affairs, for example."
University Comptroller Don Pokethat refused to comment on whether the University would di-
BING HAMTON R EVIEW 21
~--... ~< ••.. vert funds to operate ASS, noting that he was required to defer to Vice President Winters "in this and all other matters"
Campus Director of Judicial Affairs Steve Halfuelson, who was not solicited for this article, sent a note to Binghamton Review stating that he would like to comment, but according to his interpretation of the Buckley Amendment, he "cannot speak on any topic, ever."
Reaction from the campus literary community was supporti ve of ASS. Rompe del Cabeza editor Beef Barley was ebullient, vowing that " the formation of ASS will strike a dagger into the heart of fascism. Actually, I don ' t even understand what fascism is, but I love that word! Fascism, fasci sm, fascism. " Binghamton Review was initially unable to reach Wet Dream editor Carlos Pequefia, but he finally
Crisis Authori11
Thursday October 17th 8 pm FA209
22 BINGHAMTON REVIEW .... ,. .. ----phoned our offices, statin~ that this was his "one phone call. 'He said that he had been "detained," but expected to be free to analyze the situation "as soon as I post bail. " Wet Dream writer Brat Handblow, in his column "The Voice of a Schmuck," writes: "ASS is a good idea, but it is important that it has student support. I will personally call for a public oj>inion poll to gauge the aepth 01 such support for a second government. But I'm definitely for it, and after all, my opinion IS the only one that matters. There's no such thing as enouclt government."
C'"ultural groups do not appear to be en~rgized 6y the fonnation of ASS. Yiddish Student Union president Rose N. Berg has already refused to get involved in the controversy. 'We're just going to sit here on our tuchises and do nothing, just like we always do in an important situation," she asserted.
One possibility for the lack of
interest in ASS is the fact that many of their infonnation sheets were stolen upon distribution. Bystanders posItively identified Joe Testicle, a member of Latina! o American Socialists in Solidarity with Louis Farrakhan, as the cUlprit.
"I did it," said Testicle. "I screwed up. I thought they were copies of Binghamton Review."
Testicle's Ultimate pwrishment for stealing ASS information sheets is protected from public knowledge by the Buckley Amendment, SaId Halfnelson, but a source at Judicial Affairs said Testicle would be locked in a closet with Graduate Socialist Organization president Benjamin Jester for two days, during which Jester would reai:l aloud the complete works of Edward Said. This punishment is usually fatal when tested on laboratory animals.
Most student government watchers are uncertain as to the ultimate fate of ASS. "Torres and
OcrOBER, 1996 ------c .... the radicals bear watching," said Bowlajello, "but I think in the end they are playing with losing cards." Not so, says Torres. ''We ~ be a bOOCh of hapless extremist losersi but at least we'll all be wrifiea hapless extremist losers," she added.
Perhaps the most enlightened opinion on the controversy comes from Noah Ark, chainnan of the Department of Zionist Studies and distinBuished professor of Strategic Dlseng~ement. "Listen," Ark postulates, ' we alilmow just what goes into ASS. Therefore, experience tells us that we can also be pretty sure just what will come out of it."
-NathanL. Wurtzel used to be the editor ojBin~amton Review. He now spends his fjays cavorting with scantily clad co-eds on the Italian Riviera.
Have You Been Written Up By Your RA? If so, call a Student Association Ombudsperson for free advice on university legal proceedings
An Ombudsperson will ensure that your rights are respected
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OcroBBR,1996 .... ,..-----~ ~ BINGHAMTON REVIEW 23
~.---"--C .. ·· Light Up Everybody
Carlos Granda, Editor-inChief of the pipe dream, was charged with tmlawful possession ofmarijuana He was fOWld smoking a marijuana cigarette, with a friend, on the hill overlooking the pre-school play ground near Bingham Hall. Maybe this is why pipe dream has been looking a little strange lately. (Press & Sun Bulleffln, September 18, 1996).
Hush Little Baby Don't You Cry
According to Idaho Senator Larry Craig, eveIY American child "is born already owing $18,500 as his or her share of the national debt. No wonder babies cry so much ... " (The American Enterprise, July/August 1996).
What Would You Do For A Million DoDars?
Someone called the Oliver North radio show complaining that the Republican Party was the party of the ri ch. The call er spouted a statistic that one in five delegates to the Republican National Convention was a millionaire. Oliver North responded, ~~Did you know that four out of four of the media~ta1king heads' who gave you that fact is a millionaire?" (Washington Times Weekly, September 8, 1996)
True Feminism
Noelia Garcia, a leading French model, has also gained
fame, for joining in abortion clinic ~~escues. " She says, "I am a tru feminist. .. 1 don't want eveIY boy ... to regard me as a potential aborter, a piece of meat. How can a man respect a girl if he thinks she will abort a baby?" (The American Enterprise, July/August 1996)\
Other People's Money
Willie Brown, the Mayor of San Francisco, when asked how he could authorize a lawsuit by the city against tobacco companies that had donated to his campaign, said, "Hey, if you can't take people's money and then screw'em, then you've got no business being in the business." (Newsweek, July 29, 1996)
Friendly Protesters?
A group of protesters gathered outside the Whie House to protest Clinton signing the Welfare Reform Bill. A more memorable sign read "With Friends Like Bill Clinotn, Who Needs Bob Dole?" (Washington Times Weekly, September 8, 1996)
Would the Real Ross Perot Please Come Forward
Director of Washington State's Department of Agriculture, Jim Jesernig, respnds to his brother Bill's petition to legally change his
name to Ross Perot, "It's just something Bill has decided he wants to do . There's nothing the family can do to stop him." (Newsweek, August 19, 1996)
Can I Buy You A Drink
Senator Kent Conrad was quoted as saying, 'You have to have beer. If you don't have beer, what kind of country
have you got?" He was complaining about budget cuts to subsidies to barley growers, which in tum would hurt U.S. beer production. (Washington Times Weekly, September 8, 1996)
Do Computers Belong to Political Parties?
Microsoft Word 7.0 has a partisan speUchecker. It recognizes the names Kennedy, Johnson, Carter, and Clinton. However it does not recognize Nixon (for which it offers the substitute 'Nikon') or Reagan ('regain or reign'). Either Bill Gates favors Democrats or he appreciates that conservati ves do not need spellcheckers. (National Review , September 2, 1996).
The Couper Papers
118, ••• 1.8 Reyie.
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