w w w. t h e we e k l y b e a n . c a

(306) 463-6383 or e-mail:thebean@sasktel.net

October 20 2014

Of Course!Jonathan Thomas, 50, was charged with DUI and disorderly conduct in Washington Township, Indiana, in August after driving through two backyards one Friday evening and getting his vehicle stuck in the second. Police reported that Thomas “show(ed) his teeth to officers” and later “growled” at hospital security staff. Thomas’ day job is director of the Porter County Animal Shelter. [Times of Northwest Indiana (Val-paraiso), 8-4-2014]

Just Like the Script:

(1) In August, a Bradenton, Florida, deputy sheriff was forced to duplicate a classic scene from “Raiders of the

Lost Ark” when he was advanced upon by a menacing-looking, sa-murai-sword-swinging, 31-year-old man. The deputy, perhaps as non-plussed as Indiana Jones was, shot him dead.

(2) Rule No. 9: The 15-year-old granddaughter of Cliven Bundy (the Nevada rancher whose dispute with the federal government caused a notorious standoff in March) told Las Vegas’ KSNV-TV that her dad (Bundy’s son) was withdrawing her from her high school because offi-cials would not allow her to carry a knife on campus. She said her dad has taught his kids (just like “NCIS’s” Leroy Jethro Gibbs) to “always” carry a knife. [Bay News 9 (St. Petersburg), 8-28-2014] [KSNV-TV, 8-28-2014]

Town Office Hours: 8:30 am - 4:30 pmMonday to FridayBox 1269 ~ 106-5th Ave E. Kindersley, SK S0L 1S0 (306) 463-2675 www.kindersley.ca

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A BAT STORY

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and

began hassling him about where he got it. He told them to knock it off and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in. “OK, follow me,” he said and flew out of the cave with

hundreds of bats behind him. Down through a valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees. Finally he slowed

down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him. “Now, do you see that tree over there?” he asked. “Yes, yes, yes!” the bats

all screamed in a frenzy. “Good,” said the first bat, “Because I DIDN’T!”

Eating salads with oily dressings (instead of low-fat) helps to increase absortion of lutein

Dylan Ahrens, Delilah Entz, Karter Graham, Dawson Lynn Johnson, Edna Kleinsasser, Brandon Kleinsasser, Bradley Mallett, Amy Moore, Eve Motz,

Jayda Perry, Wilhelm Peters, Logan Reid, Kyla Sharmin Sacla, Klayton Vigneron, Coleman Wickstrom, Jayden Wurz, Naomi Wurz

Co-op Kid’s Club Birthdays of the Week

NOW ON

FALL SALE

ENDS NOVEMBER 8

Timmy was a little five year old boy that his Mom loved very much and, being a worrier, she was concerned about him walking to school all by himself when he started kindergarten. She walked him to school the first few days, but one day he came home and asked if he could walk by himself. He wanted to be like the

“big boys.” Not wanting to disappoint him, she decided to allow him to walk without her, via plan B (which consisted of recruiting a neighbor, Mrs. Goodnest, to repetitiously follow him to school, at a distance far enough behind him that he would not likely

notice he was being followed, but close enough to keep a watch on him).

Mrs. Goodnest was agreeable, since she was up early with her own toddler any-way, and it would be a good way for them to get some

exercise. So, the very next school day Mrs. Goodnest and her little girl, Marcy, set out to follow behind Timmy as he walked to school. Timmy was accompanied

by another neighbor boy he knew. As the boys walked to school each day, chatting, and kicking stones and twigs,

the little friend of Timmy began to notice that a lady seemed to be following them every day.

“Have you noticed that lady following us all week? Do you know her?” he asked Timmy.

“Yea, I know who she is,” Timmy replied “Well who is she?”

“That’s just Shirley Goodnest,” Timmy said. “Shirley Goodnest? Who is she? Why is she following us?”

“Well,” Timmy explained, “Every night Mom makes me say the 23rd Psalm in my prayers ‘cuz she worries about me so much. And in it the Psalm says, ‘Shirley Goodnest and Marcy shall follow me all the days of my life,’ so I guess I’ll just

have to get used to it.”

TRUCK AND CAR ACCESSORIES AND PERFORMANCE PARTS

My preacher is one of those guys who enjoys using enthusiasm while delivering his sermon. As he preaches, he often moves briskly about the platform, which jerks the cord

hooked up to his lapel microphone.Once, as he was becoming more involved in his sermon, he

moved and accidentally got wound up in the cord, nearly tripping himself before he managed to jerk free again.

After watching him make several of those circles and jerks, a little girl in the front pew (who was visiting) leaned toward her

mother and whispered, “If he gets loose, will he hurt us?”---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once, while waiting for my turn to see the doctor, a middle-aged man came

shuffling in, bent over at the waist and relying heavily upon his wife’s help and support to get into the doctor’s waiting room. A

nearby customer, also waiting, watched in sympathy before finally speaking.

“Arthritis with complications?” she asked.The wife only shook her head.

“No... Do-it-yourself with concrete blocks.”

Community Calendar

GROOVY ART CLASSES @ Groovy Dos Art Studio 425 Atlantic Ave, Kerrobert – Call Elaine @ 306-834-4300 Fall Registration Aug 1st to Sept 1stKids Art Classes Class size limited / Registration fee $35 PRE-REGISTRATION REQUIREDTwo kids classes to choose from:DRAWING & SKETCHING Appropriate for ages 9-18. $49* per month + art supply kit (approx $85)ART - IN - COLOR Appropriate for ages 6 and up. $69* per month – art supplies provided.CLASSES BEGIN 2nd week of Sept & run until last week of May following the school calendar for breaks ADULT ART -Projects are student choice. Many themes to choose from or bring your own idea to life. Realistic to Abstract / Landscape / Vehicles / Animals / People. Adult class registration can be booked on a month to month basis. CHEER & TUMBLE - Affordable Gymnastics Classes, ages 2-18, next session starts in April, now accepting applications! - Competitive Cheer Team, ages 5-14 - Birthday Parties Available!Check us out on Facebook Kerrobert Cheer & Tumble. Or Call Tajia @ 306-834-4364SUMMER LANDFILL hours are Tuesday 4:00pm-6:00pm, Thursday 4:00pm-6:00pm and Saturday 9:00am-1:00pm 2:00pm-5:00pm

Birth Matters Heartland offers:Birth Group: 3rd Friday of month Breastfeeding Moms Group: 1st Monday of month Mommy and Me Walk: Monday at 2, Wednesday at 11 For details and locations please checkwww.birthmattersheartland.com or find us on Facebook.PRAIRIE CROCUS QUILT GUILD meet 2nd Tues.of each month.iKids Club is every Thursday night at 6pm-8PM We follow the school calendar, so if there is a break at school, there is a break at iKids! iKids is $5 per child, there is a special rate for families! We also do birthday parties! Contact Becky for more info! Follow the fun at www.ikidsclub.ca and on facebook at iKids Club or email Becky becky@ikidsclub.caWALKING WITH PATHWAY TO WELLNESS Monday & Thursday - 9:30 a.m. - 11:30 a.m. Walking Track at the West Central Events Cen-ter(indoor shoes required) (wheelchair accessible/elevator)PARKINSON’S SUPPORT GROUP is held the 2nd Wednesday of ev-ery month at 2 p.m. in the Fischer Lounge of the Kindersley Hospital. For more information contact Nancy @ 306-463-4514.MENTAL HEALTH SUPPORT GROUP meeting every Wednesday at 7:00 p.m. at the Provincial Building 113 2nd Ave East Board Room. For people whose lives are affected by mental health issues. Everyone Welcome. For more information call Barb 306-463-4754.HAPPY HOLIDAYS GIFT & CRAFT FAIR- Home business vendors, crafters and artisans reserve your tables now for the November 8th Christmas Trade Fair at the Elk’s Hall. Contact heritageideals@outlook.com or call 306-460-4018 for moreinformation.STEP INTO BEGINNER FITNESS with Pathway to Wellness Mon. - Wed. 7:30pm-8:30pm Oct. 1 - Nov. 30 at the Walking Track at the WCEC.Flaxcombe Harvest Roundup Beef Supper at the Flaxcombe Hall on Sun. Nov. 2. Doors open 4:30Pm and supper begins at 5-7PM. Tickets sold at door. Adults $15, kids 4-11 $6 and under 4 free. Silent action which closes at 6:30pm. Everyone welcome.

The Great Calendar Of Events

KINDERSLEY TOPS (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) Chapter #1136:Anybody interested in joining or checking out the group are welcome to attend meetings any Monday at 7:00p.m., Kindersley Senior Centre, 115 3rd Ave. E.A.A. - Mon. 8PM at the Legion Hall. Tues 8PM Brock The Vesper Club, Tues. 8PM Leader United Church. Wed. 8PM Eston United Church, Thurs. 8PM Kindersley New Life Church, Fri. 8PM Kindersley Lutheran Church.AL-ANON Mon. 8PM at the Legion Hall Call 306-463-6654or 965-2659.THE OIL WIVES CLUB OF KINDERSLEY, LADIES, If your spouse or significant other, works in the oil patch, you are invit-ed to join the Oil Wives Club of Kindersley in a once a month, fun night of “Fostering Friendship.” contact Mary Ann at 306-463-6164 or 306-463-9352.INTERESTED IN PHOTOGRAPHY? Join us - the Gleneath Camera Glub on the first Tues. of the month at 7pm. Sept - June at the Kindersley Senior Centre, 115 3rd Ave E. SMILEY UNITED CHURCH FOWL SUPPER – Sunday Oct. 26th from 5:00 – 7:00 pm. Everyone Welcome.FRIDAY NIGHT DANCE - Oct. 24th at the Kindersley Elks’ HallMusic by “Yesteryear”8:00 – 11:30 pm. All ages welcome.Come join us for the first dance of the season.PRAIRIE CROCUS QUILT GUILD on Tues Oct 14 at 7pm at the Senior Centre. Everyone welcome.WELCOME NIGHT on Oct 29th @ 7 PM at the Elks Hall. Everyone Welcome! JUNE HUDY, a former Kindersley resident, will be at the Kindersley Library promoting her new book , Shadows of the Mind on Oct. 24 1-4pm. JERRY HAIGH, a Saskatchewan author, will be sharing his experiences as a Wildlife Vet in Africa. He’ll be at Caleb Village, Kindersley and is sponsored by the Kindersley Library. Open to everyone. Nov. 21 at 7:00pmMAD HATTER’S TEA PARTY and Bake Sale on Sat. Oct. 25 at the United Church Hall from 2-3:30PM.HAM SUPPER & SILENT AUCTION on Sun. Nov. 9 @ 5pm at the Masonic Hall. Tickets available at the door. Proceeds to local charities. Sponsored by Queen Alexandra of the Eastern Star.BREAST CANCER MOBILE BUS will be in Kindersley Nov 3 - Nov 21 on 4th Ave and Main Street. Early detection saves lives. Call 1-855-584-8228 to book your appointment.THE WEST CENTRAL CRISIS & FAMILY SUPPORT CENTRE is looking for volunteers for Santa’s Hut 2014. We host this event in 6 communities including Coleville, Eatonia, Eston, Kinders-ley, Marengo & Rosetown. If you are interested in helping with this Great Community Event and building self-esteem in the youth of our communities, please contact Doreen Gramlich @ 306.463.6655 or Misty Leismeister @ 1.403.548.4564

Hi Neighbours:

Last month SK grew by 5,000 people or, put another way, another Kindersley has sprouted up. Kindersley, and municipalities across the province, need help with housing and both hard (water, waste water, roads) and soft (pool/recreation/arts) infrastructure. Did you know that 130 SK municipalities have been advised by the province that they cannot develop more residential, commercial or industrial properties until their infrastructure is either expanded or updated? We are not one of those communities. We have plans and have been implementing them, but we still have our frustrations and challenges and are working hard to stay ahead of events without getting too far ahead.

Our housing situation is frustrating; I share many of your feelings about this issue. I’m appalled and saddened to hear of multiple families sharing two or three bedroom units in our and surrounding communities. Last winter we were working on a deals to bring in rental housing and homes around $150k per unit, but the deals didn’t work for reasons beyond our control. Currently the housing market in Saskatchewan is robust and developers are picking the low hanging fruit. Kindersley is not considered low hanging fruit because of the distance from major centres. The distance drives up costs. The esti-mates of the increase I have heard vary. We are grateful to those who have and are currently building in our community.

I, and Bernie, have spoken with people to develop apartments but there is nothing yet to announce.The provincial government has not provided extra funding to the local housing authorities and as a result there has been no new housing authority inventory for at least 25 years in Kindersley. I have spoken with the housing authority about building extra units but it is a question of funding. The only municipality in the province, to the best of my knowledge, to get extra housing authority inventory funding is Moose Jaw. Unfortunately, Council has little control over this frustrating issue, but we continue to work with the province for funds to build affordable housing.

People have expressed concern about the cost of the new townhouses and I do wish the market priced them lower. However, as Adam Smith said: we rely on “the invisible hand of the market’ moving things forward. How this works is very much what happened with Caleb: as people move from one type of residence to another the former residence is available. In essence, the market it is developing a flow so affordable units not currently available become available. (This is market theory).

Please write or phone if you would like me to discuss a particular topic. If you have any questions or comments, drop me a line at the town office or email me at mayorenns-wind@kindersley.ca. You can also check out my blog athttp://mayorjohn.blogspot.ca/. I appreciate your feedback.

DATING WORDS TO LIVE BY

4 If he asks what sort of books you’re interested in, tell him check books.

4 Men of quality respect women’s equality.

4 Remember a sense of humor does not meanthat you tell him jokes, it means you laugh at his.

4 If a man suggests that you take a breakfrom vacuuming the living room and relax,

what it means is he can’t hear the T.V.

4 The best way to get a man to do something is tosuggest they are too old for it.

4 Men are like....Teeth. You ignore them - you lose them.

Have you ever seen people campaigning for public office? Recently I went to see two candidates who had

somehow scheduled simultaneous campaign rallies in the same park of my city.

After a lengthy round of speeches, the candidates worked their way through the crowd -- shaking hands, kissing babies

and beaming mightily.

However, when without warning the skies opened and it began to rain, one of the candidates fled to take shelter in a nearby restaurant along with half a dozen regulars. But the other candidate continued to move through the crowd-shak-

ing hands, kissing babies, etc.

“That man’s persistent” I said to someone standing nearby. “Sure makes it easy to know who to vote for.”

“Yep,” he agreed. “Sure can’t see myself casting a vote for a man who hasn’t the good sense to come in out of the rain.”

Another busy day

at the office.Get expert advice today.

1.866.825.3301

Television Neighbors How well do you know your neighbors? We’ll give you the neighbors, you tell us the show... 1. Fred and Ethel Mertz a)Happy Days b)Good Timesc)I Love Lucy d)The Honeymooners 2. Jerry and Millie Helper a)My Three Sonsb)Leave it to Beaverc)I Love Lucyd)Dick Van Dyke Show 3. Jefferson and Marcie D’Arcy a)All in the Family b)Family Mattersc)Full Housed)Married with Children 4. George and Martha Wilson a)Family Matters b)Who’s the Bossc)The Jefferson’s d)Dennis the Menace

5. Rodger and Kay Addison a)Bewitched b)Growing Painsc)Married with Childrend)Mr. Ed

6. Gladys and Abner Kravitz a)Little House on the Prairieb)The Cosby Showc)All in the Familyd)Bewitched 7. George and Louise Jefferson a)The Cosby Show b)All in the Familyc)Bewitched d)Sanford and Son 8. Ned and Maude Flanders a)Happy Days b)The Simpsonsc)Threes Companyd)Married with Children

1. c 2. d, 3. d, 4.d, 5. d, 6. d, 7. b, 8. b

* The yo-yo originated in the Philippines, where it was used as a weapon in hunting.* All of the cobble stones that used to line the streets in New York were originally weighting stones put in the hulls of Belgian ships to keep an even keel.* The top layer of a wedding cake, known as the groom’s cake, is usually a fruit cake so it will last until the couple’s first anniversary, when they will eat it.* Months that begin with a Sunday will always have a “Friday the 13th.”* The dial tone of a normal telephone is in the key of “F”.* If you told someone that they were one in a million, you’d be saying there were about 1,800 of them in China.

Do you like chocolate?

Here’s a list of reasons why you should, if you don’t already...

* Chocolate is a vegetable: it is derived from cocoa beans. Beans are a vegetable. * Sugar is derived from either sugar CANE or sugar BEETS. Both are plants, which places them in the vegetable category. Thus (to repeat my point), chocolate is a vegetable. * To go one step further, chocolate candy bars also contain milk, which is a dairy product. So chocolate and candy bars containing it are a health food. * Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want. * If you have a problem of trying to figure out how you can get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car, I have the solution for you: eat it in the parking lot. * Diet tip: eat a chocolate bar one half hour before each meal. It’ll take the edge off your appetite, and you’ll eat less. * If you eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, isn’t that a balanced diet? Don’t they actually counteract each other? * Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger. * Put “eat chocolate” at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you’ll get one thing done. * A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Now, isn’t that handy?

The Value Of Time

Imagine there is a bank that credits your account each morning with $86,400. It carries over no balance from day to day. Every eve-ning it deletes whatever part of the balance you failed to use during the day. What would you do? Draw out every cent of course!

Each of us has such a bank. Its name is TIME. Every morning it credits you with 86,400 secondes & at night, it writes off, as lost, whatever of this you have failed to invest to good purpose.

It carries over no balance. It allows no overdraft. Each day it opens a new account for you & it burns the remains of the day. If you fail to use the day’s deposits, the loss is yours.

There is no going back. There is no drawing against the quota tomorrow. You must life in today’s deposits. Invest it so as to get from it the utmost in health, happiness & success in the running. Make the most of today.

To realize the value of ONE YEAR, ask a student who failed a grade in school.

To realize the value of ONE MONTH, ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby.

To realize the value of ONE WEEK, ask the editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize the value of ONE HOUR, ask the lovers who are waiting to be married.

To realize the value of ONE MINUTE, ask the person who missed the train.

To realize the value of ONE SECOND, ask a person who just avoided an accident.

To realize the value of ONE MILLISECOND, ask the person who won a silver medal in the Olympics.

Treasure every moment you have! And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special enough to spend your time. And remember that time waits for no one.

Yesterday Is History, Tomorrow Is A Mystery, Today Is A Gift - That’s Why It’s Called The Present!

A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. Alittle boy, playing in front of his house, saw him & called, “What have you got in your truck?”

“Fertilizer,” the farmer replied.

“What are you going to do with it?” asked the little boy.

“Put it on strawberries,” answered the farmer.

“You ought to live here,” the little boy advised him. “We put sugar & cream on ours.”-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

An elderly lady went to a tombstone-cutter’s office to order a stone for her husband’s grave. After explaining that all she wanted was a small one with no frills, she told him to put the words “To My

Husband” in a suitable place. When the stone was delivered, she saw to her horror this inscription:

TO MY HUSBAND - IN A SUITABLE PLACE.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“An Archaeologist Is The Best Husband A Woman Can Have; The Older She Gets, The More Interested He Is In Her.”

~ Agatha Christie