MARGARITAVILLEMEMIORS- THE FIRST2005 QUARTERLY PUBLICATIONOF THE PARROTHEADS OF THESAVANNAH RIVER-“PROUDLYSERVING THE CSRA”

CAPTAINS LOG-2005

Well Mates it has been a banner year. We have donated $3000.00 to our localcharities and had a great time doing it,we truly know what it means to " Partywith a Purpose". And that doesn'tinclude the pounds cat and dog food,school supplies for The Children’sPlace and Christmas toys for MCG andBirkie's kids. Our January meeting we will be planningour charities and fundraisers for 2005.Do you believe it? Seems like Y2K wasjust yesterday. Also be thinking aboutnew officers and board members. Whodo you think would do a good job? Maybe it's you.In the last year or so the club has grown,I would say doubled and we areexperiencing some growing pains. Whenthere were only ten of us it was easy tokeep track of events and change inplans. Since we have become largerthings are a little more difficult andSusie has suggested a calling tree andhas volunteered to be our

club's membership coordinator.We need to thank Becky W. for hostingour Christmas Party and the Jell-Oshots. I think everyone had a great timeand has always we had an abundance ofgreat food. Also thanks to everyone forthe toys. Barbara, John, Becky W.Johnny and I delivered the toys to MCGand Burkie this week.Well it is less than eleven months untilwe go back to the Keys. This year wasthe goody bags were excellent, the bandswere great and JB showed up at the Casaon Thursday night. He played about anhour and a half, did an acoustic set,talked a lot and really seemed to beenjoying himself. And yes, I havepictures if anyone would like to seethem. Remember registration for 2005opens January 1st.I hope to see you all at our next meetingJanuary 15th, 5PM at the Fox's Lair. Also if you want to know what ishappening at the Lair the other threeweeks of the month, give Birkie youremail address and he will send you hisweekly schedule.Fins Up, Connie

Conch Man’s Corner Happy Holidays to all youFRUITCAKES! As 2004 ends, letsreflect back at the year we have had. Itwas great to say the least; New members,new meeting place, and most of all “lotsof money raised for our community”. AVery Well Done Job to ALL I am very proud to be a part of thisorganization. I see the future as more ofthe same. We seem to get better everyyear.The last few months have ran togetherwe are still fun to be around and verycharitable. Our club came in ThirdPlace for raising $$$$$for Austin’sArmy. Not bad for an all volunteer force.However, I did notice that we need topractice just a little in the marchingdepartment- some of us were out of step.Thanks to all who attended our Parrot-Head Wedding. Most of all a veryspecial thank you to Susan for herattendance. I still can’t figure out whyshe showed up, but I am extremelyhappy that she did. Our First Halloween Party at Joe’s Barand Grill was a Big Hit. Thank you Abeand Janice. I do believe someone (me)had the band thinking- “What did we getinvolved in”?Key West and MOTM 2004- this wasmy fourth meeting in a row. In my fouryears of attending MOTM, Jimmy hasshowed up two times. I have still yet tosee him there though. The first year, Iwas busy being a tourist and missed him.This year, I was “too drunk” and missedhim again. Oh well, maybe next year. As we close out 2004 and the conchdrops to being 2005, we will do solooking forward to whomever andwhatever we can help. Keep up thewonderful work and I will see you at thePolar Bear Express Party at Joe andBecky’s on New Year’s Day. Onceagain, thank you for allowing me to be

your Second In Command at the Helm-Vice President. And Thank You Conniefor doing such a nice job as ourCommander In Chief. Thanks to allofficers and board members – GreatJob!!! Our motto for 2004 was “let’sparty with a purpose in 04”. So letscontinue to strive in “05”. Karl- The Conch Man- Blowing YourWayALL MY SAILS ARE A FLYIN’

UPCOMING PHLOCKINGS"Come along let's have some fun The hard work has been done... "

February 5th- First Annual Chili CookOff @ Mama Bears aka Joe’s Bar andGrill-1PM set up- $3 to taste. Winner ofcook off donates all proceeds to charityof choice. Mardi Gras theme party-socome dressed in your best gold, greenand purple outfit. Raffle/auction tobenefit our 10th Anniversary in 2006.February (3rd Saturday)- Fox’s Liar- 5o’clock somewhere- Club will decide oncharities for the year.March (3rd Saturday)- Fox’s Liar- 5PM -Club Officers/Board MembersElections. If anyone is interested inrunning for an office-submit your nameat the Feb. Meeting.April (3rd Saturday)- Fox’s Liar- 5PM.Page 2-

PAST PHLOCKINGSOctober- Halloween Party at Joe’ Bar& Grill. Best Buffett Related CostumeTrophy went to Susie Sadowsiki forDesamona’s building a Rocket ship. November- MOTM-Key Westfeaturing Jimmy himself. A few of ourfriends saw Jimmy up close andpersonal. Also November’s GeneralMonthly Meeting at the Fox’s Lair-upcoming events and charities discussed.December- Christmas Party at BeckyW’s. Seems Becky had a Real SmokeOut of a party- to many Christmascandles lit the Yule Tide Logs in thefireplace. Great food and good times. Wecollected lots of toys for the MCG KIDS.January- Meeting at the Fox’sLiar- General Meeting-Fundraisingevents discussed. Thanks to Birkieand Carol- GREAT spaghetti and Funkaraoke. Welcome new members.Don’t forget to register of MOTM.

1. FOR THOSE THAT MISSED JBAT MOTM---- (INCLUDING ME -THE EDITOR and KARL)Thursday November 4, 2004 West Lawn of the Casa Marina KeyWest, FL.Surprise Appearance at the Peter

Mayer Show-- The scheduled showwas for Peter Mayer, but Buffett showedup along with most of the Coral ReeferBand. They played 15 songs;1. License To Chill 2. Carnival World 3. Waiting in Vein 4. Havana Daydreamin' 5. It's 5'o Clock Somewhere(w/Mac) 6. Hey Good Lookin' 7. Woman Goin' Crazy onCaroline Street (Just Jimmy) 8. I have Found Me A Home(Just Jimmy) 9. Distantly in Love (JustJimmy) 10. Coast of Carolina 11. Piece of Work 12. Scarlet Begonias 13. Fins 14. Southern Cross Encore: 15. A Pirate Looks at Forty (JustJimmy)

..it's a jungle out there kiddies, have avery phruitful day ! Page 3 (aka-DOOR # 3)

Show Notes The last time "Waiting in Vein" wasplayed was April 3, 2002 in West PalmBeach, FL The last time "Havana Daydreamin" wasplayed was November 2, 2002 in Miami,FL.The last time "Woman Goin' Crazy onCaroline Street" was played wasNovember 7, 1998 in Key West, FL The last time "I Have found me aHome" was played was December 5,2003 in Key West, FL The last time "Distantly in Love" wasplayed was March 21, 2002 in WakkiBeach, HI

Band Members at MOTM- Jimmy - Guitar, Vocals Peter Mayer - Guitar, Vocals Mac McAnally - Guitar, Vocals Roger Guth - Drums Jim Mayer - Bass, Vocals Tina Gullickson - Vocals Robert Greenidge - Steel Drums T.C. Mitchell - Saxophone Doyle Grisham - Steel Guitar

2. Jimmy sings a song "An Attitudewith Gratitude" on Marlo Thomas's Cdtitled "Thanks and Giving All YearLong". All sales and profit goes to St.Jude Children's Research Hospital.

3. Interpretations of LTC---Buffettwants to relax and enjoy life (“TripAround the Sun” with MartinaMcBride). On “Anything, Anytime,Anywhere” he assures a special lady,“Tell me what you need/I will surelycome through.” Sailboats are a metaphorfor unfulfilled dreams the singer is readyto pursue (“Boats to Build” with AlanJackson). Amid sober reflections, a manclaims to have learned from his mistakeson “Scarlet Begonias.” The irreverent“Coastal Confessions” finds a cocky,

unrepentant man prattling to a priestabout impure thoughts and marijuanause, saying, “Bless me father/Yes, I havesinned/Given the chance I’ll probably doit again.” Strangers have a fling thatinvolves cruising bars and buying athong (“Conky Tonkin” with Clint Black).With bad-boy aplomb, the spirituallyconfused Buffett calls himself a “Pieceof Work” (a Toby Keith duet). Aided byKenny Chesney on the title track, hemisuses Jesus’ name, ogles half-nakedwomen and calls his boss a jerk.Profanities mar several cuts. Beyond ans-word, “Simply Complicated” imaginesreceiving perverse news about familymembers.

4. The Alan Jackson/Jimmy Buffett hit"It's Five O'clock Somewhere" wasnamed ASCAP Country Song of theYear at the annual gala.

5. How does one spot a parrothead?Just as Trekkies have distinctiveuniforms, parrotheads have unmistakablecharacteristics. First, look for strangehomemade hats, often containing plasticfruit, tropical flora, stuffed parrots, andcheesburgers...hats you wouldn't wear onHalloween.

PAGE 4- Now he lives on the islands,fishes the pylons, and drinks his greenlabel each day.

6. 1977- Margaritaville hits No. 13.Follow-up Changes in Latitudes,Changes in Attitudes reaches No. 24.

1984- When the Wild Life Betrays Meclimbs to No. 42, followed by BiggerThan the Both of Us, which peaks atNo. 58. 1985 -Three hits: in chronological order,Who's the Blonde Stranger (No. 37),Gypsies in the Palace (No. 56), If ThePhone Doesn't Ring, It's Me (No. 16). 1986 - Please Bypass This Heart-bypasses the top 40, topping out at No.50. 1993 -Sam Cooke remake -AnotherSaturday Night squeaks onto the chartfor one week at No. 74. 1999- Duets with Alan Jackson onMargaritaville, a track from Jackson'sroots- salute album, Under the Influence.

2003- Guest shot on Jackson's- It's FiveO'Clock Somewhere pays off with aNo. 1 placing. 2004- Hey Good Lookin', with fivecountry superstar cameos, reaches No.13 (and may climb higher).

7. The 38th Annual Country MusicAssociation Awards Show yielded noawards to Jimmy Buffett. Buffett wasnominated in two categories - VocalEvent of the Year for "Hey GoodLooking," and Music Video of the Yearfor "It's Five O'Clock Somewhere." BradPaisley and Allison Krauss'. "WhiskeyLullaby" took the honors in bothcategories.Buffett has had four CMA nominationsover the years, winning one of them. In1977, he was nominated for Single of theYear for "Margaritaville." In 2003,Buffett and Alan Jackson won the awardfor Vocal Event of the Year for "It'sFive O’clock Somewhere."

8. Photo Gallery - Making the Video:"Trip Around the Sun" Megastars Jimmy Buffett and MartinaMcBride on the set of their brand newmusic video, "Trip Around The Sun,"shot near Charleston, S.C. The exclusiveCMT program, MAKING THE VIDEO:JIMMY BUFFETT & MARTINAMCBRIDE, premiered Wednesday, Nov.10 –And still showing.

9. The Miami Herald has an article onBuffett's November 23rd show inOrlando. Jimmy Buffett's latest CD might becalled License to Chill, but he's notslacking when it comes to hurricanerelief efforts.The beloved singer/songwriter and hisCoral Reefer Band performed a specialconcert on Nov. 23rd in Orlando toraise hurricane relief funds for Florida,Alabama and the Caribbean.

Page 5--They're Ugly and Square They Don't Belong There They Looked a Lot Better as Beer Cans.

Jimmy Buffett and the Coral ReeferBand performed a hurricane reliefbenefit show dubbed "Surviving theStorm" at the TD Waterhouse Centre inOrlando, Florida.The show was the first show to bebroadcast live on screens atMargaritaville Cafes in Key West,Myrtle Beach, Las Vegas, New Orleans,and at Lulus at Home Port Marina inGulf Shores, Alabama..Jan. 06. 2005------Buffett Signs Harley forTsunami victims: Jay Leno is auctioning off a classic HarleyDavidson motorcycle on Ebay to benefit thetsunami victims. The bike is being signed byJay's guests to increase the bidding. On thisevenings (Thursday the 6th) Tonight Showjust after Jay finished his monologue Jimmycame out and said he was just stopping by tosign the bike. He signed the right(passengers side) of the gas tank. Aftersigning the bike Jimmy looked at his watchand said "It's 5 O'clock somewhere I gottago."10. In the latest issue of the CoconutTelegraph, Jimmy describes how hereally did pay the mini mart back. "Yes I did pay the minimart back severalyears after my struggling college days. Iwas out of debt and doing quite well andI found myself on a long bus ride fromTennessee to New Orleans. It was verylate at night when we passed throughHattiesburg and I had my bus driver pulloff the interstate and go through town,where I got out at the two stores I used tofrequent and slipped a couple of hundreddollar bills under the door of each andthen headed down the road. I don't know who got the money, but inthe way I see things, I had made the rightdeposits in my karma bank. It seems tohave worked out."

11. Jimmy made the followingappearances to promote his new book.Live on CNN - Monday, November

29 .Today Show - Tuesday, November30.Regis & Kelly - Thursday, December2nd.

12. If you missed this “LIVE”, HighDefinition simulcast of Jimmy Buffettreturning to his writing roots in NewOrleans on December 8th- then youmissed one GREAT SHOW. Anevening of readings from and storiesabout his new book- A SALTYPIECE OF LAND. He also answeredthe questions that bother us so andperform with his beach band.According to Margaritaville, this DVDshould be out in early 2005.Jana and I (Myra) had theopportunity to attend and may wesay “Better than any concert that wehave ever been to”. Laid back, veryentertaining and enchanting”. Threeand ½ hours of BUFFETT in his ownWORLD.

13. Parrothead: “ A Deadhead with aCredit Card”. - Jimmy Buffett, On Livewith Regis and Kelly - 12/2/04--- That’swhat WE are.14. Here's a Buffett quote Ipulled from a Dec. 6 USA Todayarticle:

Quote:

Buffett can't do book signings, because"they turn into Parrothead events, andpeople at book stores get freaked out."

Page 6“And the walls that won't come down We can decorate or climb or find someway to get around”

15. According to Margaritaville severalnew Cheeseburger in Paradise have and

will open soon. They are Myrtle Beach-open, Greenville, SC-TBA, Polaris, OH-Dec. 04, Ashville, NC-early 2005,Warrensville Heights, OH- March 2005,Dunwoody, Ga- Nov. 2005, Hillard, OH-late 2005, Chesapeake, Va-late 2005,Woodbridge, Va-April 2005 andPasadena, MD- Dec 2004. There are atotal of 30 Cheeseburgers in Paradiseopening on the east coast. Check outMargaritaville.com .The Asheville Citizen-Times has anarticle "Jimmy Buffett to playbenefit show at new Ashevillerestaurant" http://www.citizen-times.com/cache/article/news/73228.shtml Legendary singer-songwriterJimmy Buffett played a surpriseshow in Asheville next Tuesday,Jan. 11, at his new Cheeseburgerin Paradise restaurant, organizerssaid Monday. All proceeds willbenefit the Eblen Foundation,which last week quietly sold 260tickets - each priced at $250.16. According to Steve Huntington, DJfor Radio Margaritaville, "Piece ofWork," Buffett's duet with Toby Keith,will be the next single released off ofLicense to Chill. "Hey Good Lookin'"and "Trip Around the Sun" have beenreleased off the album so far.

17. Buffett shares life withadoring fans

N.O. event packs the house

By PETE TATTERSALLTHE SUN HERALD

NEW ORLEANS - Shortly after 8p.m. Wednesday, Jimmy Buffetttook the stage at the MahaliaJackson Theatre of thePerforming Arts and for the nexttwo hours proceeded todeconstruct and examine the

myth that is the man. Officiallytitled "A Coastal Confession: AnEvening With Jimmy Buffett," amore apt description would be"Buffett 101: A master's course inParrot Headology," a notionBuffett, a Pascagoula native whostudied journalism at theUniversity of SouthernMississippi, may dispute. "It's notlike you're going to class," he toldthe assembled audience. "Youdon't have to take notes, and thebar will be open late." Early in theevening, a mini-revolt at theMahalia Jackson Theatreappeared imminent whenconcert-goers learned of a houserule limiting beverageconsumption to the lobby. Facedwith outraged cries of blasphemy- a dry Buffett concert?-Management quickly relentedand suspended the rule for theevening. Buffett, one of the mostsuccessful and savvyentrepreneurs in show business,has for more than two decadessuccessfully packaged and soldan idyllic vision of Caribbeanwanderlust that has warmed thehearts of many a snow-boundworker bee trapped in anondescript office eight or morehours a day. With the recentrelease of his newest book, "ASalty Piece of Land,"Page 7- "There's come a lot ofMondays, since the phone booththat first night..."

Buffett said Wednesday he wantedto return to the roots of his writing:New Orleans. Buffett has indeed led

a colorful life. On Wednesday hediscussed his family, his childhoodand major influences in a life thathas been fodder for his innumerablesongs. "I was an altar boy 'til I was17, and by 18-“ I was dropping acidand seeing ghosts in the FrenchQuarter," he said. Throughout theevening, Buffett was preaching tothe converted. Not only did thevenue sell out (reportedly in minutesat $50-$60 a pop), the event wassimulcast live to more than 50 movietheaters throughout the nation,where the devoted happily shelledout $15-$18 for admission. Wearingblue jeans and a blue, untuckedoxford, a barefoot Buffett wasaccompanied by a stellar band thatincluded several longtime members.Throughout the evening, Buffettwould play a song or two, put downhis acoustic guitar, pick up his newbook and read selected passagesaloud. He also fielded questions,both from the New Orleans audienceand via satellite, and read entriesfrom a diary he'd kept during histravels. The evening was steeped inGulf South culture, with a nod toevents such as mullet tosses (howmany internationally acclaimedsingers, after all, have a song titled"I Will Play for Gumbo"?). Ticketssales, in fact, were limited to thoseliving in Louisiana, Mississippi, SouthAlabama and the Florida Panhandle.More than anything, the eveningserved as an opportunity to get toknow the singer better, somethingmany longtime fans have longed forfor years. Toward the end of theevening, Buffett appeared toacknowledge this phenomenon.

"Being a legend in your spare timegets to be an interesting thing," hesaid.18. RADIO MARGARITAVILLE WINS2004 SILVER MICROPHONE AWARDSJimmy Buffett’s Radio Margaritavillehas been named a National Winner in theSilver Microphone Awards for the year2004. The competition, in its 20th year,is designed to select the best local andregional radio commercials, audioprograms and Web sites created byadvertising agencies, audio productioncompanies and radio stations in theUnited States.

Page- 8- Buffett- Live inNew Orleans

19.

Confirmed Tour Dates for 2005:

From Margaritaville.com: Thursday Feb 17th, 2005 – Columbia, SC -Colonial Center Saturday Feb 19, 2005 - Ft Lauderdale, FL -Office Depot Monday Feb 21st, 2005 – Jacksonville, FL -Jacksonville Arena Wednesday, Feb. 23 - Charlotte, NC -Coliseum Saturday Feb 26, 2005 - Tampa, FL - FordAmphitheater

All shows go on sale January 22.

Put a conch shell to my ear, and Itook off for the ocean, I was searchingfor the coast.. 20. Margaritaville looks at twenty.We're asking ourselves how wegot here ( we haven't a clue ) andwe're asking the Big Guy for hisremarks and recollectionsregarding the last two decades.Now you have a chance as well.Jimmy wondered what the Parrot

Heads would like to ask, not yourrun of the mill "did you pay theMini-Mart back" type of question,but rather something that wouldreally make him pause and thinkabout.

This is your opportunity to ask thequestion that bothers you so. While we can not reply to all, wewill forward the queries that wefeel are of interest to the majorityof Parrot Heads.

http://margaritaville.com/ask_jimmy.htm

HISTORY LESSON

In early 1989 Scott Nickerson of Atlanta, Georgia decided he had met so many great people "tailgating" before Buffettconcerts that he should do something to get those people together more than once a year. His idea was to create somethingdifferent than a typical social club or fan club, by forming a group that would not only enjoy a wide variety of socialactivities but also provide volunteer support for local (and beyond) community and environmental concerns. After all,Jimmy had set the example with Save the Manatees Club, Friends of Florida, etc., so it seemed a good bet that thisconcept would appeal to most parrot heads.After 3 months of brainstorming, and receiving blessings from Margaritaville Key West, Scott put an ad in a free, weeklyentertainment newspaper in hopes of starting the first organized parrot head club. Scott figured it was hit or miss, butinquiries came pouring in. Within a month, a core consisting of Scott and two other parrot heads had organized the firstgroup meeting.On April 1, 1989 approximatedly 15 parrot heads met at Chastain Park (the site of many previous Buffett concerts inAtlanta), for the first official parrot head club meeting, then headed to a local patio bar for margaritas. More and morepeople began to flock to the club's bi-weekly happy hours, and it became obvious that the Atlanta Parrot Head Club wasgoing to be a hit. During the next year or so, the club participated in several volunteer events with: the Red Cross,Children's Wish Foundation, S.I.D.S., UNICEF, the Atlanta Community Food Bank, Chattahoochee River Clean Up, andan "underwater monopoly" event that not only raised over seventy thousand dollars for Muscular Dystrophy but alsobroke the Guinness Book record! The club has been involved in the same types of activities ever since. Page9

A short blurb about the Atlanta Parrot Head Club appeared in the Coconut Telegraph, written by Marty Lehmann (editor).Parrot head subscribers from everywhere began to call in to ask how to start the same kind of club in their own towns.Marty was impressed with the way the Atlanta club was running, so he asked Scott to write this "Guidelines" handbook tohelp start, and promote consistency between clubs. Three years later, Scott was asked to handle all club-related inquiriesand be consultant to all newly forming clubs.

By the end of 1992, clubs had emerged in Beaumont, Dallas, New York City, Orlando, Detroit, and New Orleans. TheFirst Annual Parrot Head Convention, or "Meeting of the Minds" as it is fondly referred to, was organized by Jerry Diazof the Beaumont club to take place in New Orleans, Louisiana, home of the newest Margaritaville Store & Cafe, in lateDecember '92. Approximately 80 people attended and all had a fantastic time. After all expenses were deducted from thecollected registration fees, $200 was left over and donated to New Orleans Artists Against Hunger & Homelessness. Theclubs also "honored" Jimmy with the lifetime achievement "Silver Chalice" award, which can still be seen high over theregister at the Margaritaville store.

Nearly a year later, a second convention in New Orleans was put together by Scott Nickerson and the Atlanta Club forlate October '93. By this time, 19 clubs existed and more were on the way. 165 parrot heads attended this convention,which was highlighted by a parrot head party at Margaritaville Cafe. The party was opened by a surprise video welcomefrom Jimmy on the big screen over the stage, followed by Scott's Buffett Tribute band, A1A, getting the party into fullswing playing everyone's favorite Buffett songs. $400 was donated to N.O.A.A.H.H. out of the registration funds thatyear. During the convention, a stronger connection was made with Margaritaville by Sunshine Smith's (Jimmy's businesspartner) presence at our meeting. Prior to that meeting, Sunshine named Scott official liaison between the clubs andMargaritaville, Inc.

Inspired by Sunshine, the national organization, Parrot Heads In Paradise was established in early 1994, in essence, toprovide further guidance and support to the ever-growing number of local clubs and to give the associated clubs nationalrecognition.

In Nov., 1994, the 3rd Annual "Meeting of the Minds", was again held in New Orleans. By this time there were over 50active clubs. At least 30 founders or representatives showed up to meet and discuss parrot head club achievements, andover 325 parrot heads attended this convention. Key West, the Band, provided their renditions of Buffett's music, andoriginals, for the parrot head party at Margaritaville Cafe.

It was evident that the conventions had roughly doubled in size each year! By the 4th Annual Convention in Nov. 1995

SO YOU THINKYOU KNOWEVERYTHING?

A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue. –sounds like most men.

A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.

A goldfish has a memory span of threeseconds. Again – sounds like mostmen.

A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for1/100th of a second.

A shark is the only fish that can blinkwith both eyes. Not my husband.

A snail can sleep for three years. That’smy husband.

Al Capone's business card said he was aused furniture dealer.

Page 11-"Anything, anytime, anywhere --For you.”

All 50 states are listed across the top ofthe Lincoln Memorial on the back of the$5 bill. I wouldn’t know this- myhusband never has any of these-I

wouldn’t know this.

Almonds are a member of the peachfamily.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.So is my husbands.

Babies are born without kneecaps. Theydon't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6years of age.

Butterflies taste with their feet.So does my husband.

Cats have over one hundred vocalsounds. So does my wife.Dogs only have about 10- so does mywife."Dreamt" is the only English word thatends in the letters "mt".

February 1865 is the only month inrecorded history not to have a full moon.

In the last 4,000 years, no new animalshave been domesticated. See myhusband for a prime example.

If the population of China walked pastyou, in single file, the line would neverend because of the rate of reproduction.

If you are an average American, in yourwhole life, you will spend an average of6 months waiting at red lights.

It's impossible to sneeze with your eyesopen.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.

No word in the English languagerhymes with month, orange, silver, or

purple.

On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flagflying over the Parliament building is anAmerican flag.

Our eyes are always the same size frombirth, but our nose and ears never stopgrowing.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients ofdynamite.

Rubber bands last longer whenrefrigerated. Wish my husband was arubber band.

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typedwith only the left hand and "lollipop"with your right.

The average person's left hand does 56%of the typing.

The cruise liner, QE2, moves only sixinches for each gallon of diesel that itburns.

The microwave was invented after aresearcher walked by a radar tube and achocolate bar melted in his pocket.

The sentence: "The quick brown foxjumps over the lazy dog" uses everyletter of the alphabet.

Page 12- Haul the sheet in as weride on the wind that our ”Forefathers” harnessed before us.

The winter of 1932 was so cold thatNiagara Falls froze completely solid.Sounds like my husband.

The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level'are the same whether they are read left toright or right to left (palindromes).

There are 293 ways to make change for adollar. Wish my husband knew thisinformation.

There's no Betty Rubble in theFlintstones Chewable Vitamins. Sorry GIRLS!!!!!

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies'room during a dance.

Women blink nearly twice as much asmen.

Your stomach has to produce a new layerof mucus every two weeks; otherwise itwill digest itself. Wish my husbandwould digest himself.

SoutherneseA redneck family from the hillswas visiting the city and theywere in a mall for the first timein their life. The father and sonwere strolling around while thewife shopped. They wereamazed by almost everythingthey saw, but especially by twoshiny, silver walls that couldmove apart and then slide backtogether again. The boy asked,"Paw, What's 'at?" The father(never having seen an elevator)responded, "Son, I dunno. Iain't never seen anything likethat in my entire life, I ain't gotno idea'r what it is." While the boy and his fatherwere watching with amazement,a fat old lady in a wheel chairrolled up to the moving walls

and pressed a button. The wallsopened and the lady rolled between them into a smallroom. The walls closed and theboy and his father watched thesmall circular numbers abovethe walls light up sequentially.They continued to watch until itreached the last number andthen the numbers began to lightin the reverse order. Then thewalls opened up again and agorgeous, voluptuous 24-year-old blonde woman stepped out.The father, not taking his eyesoff the young woman, saidquietly to his Son, "Boy, go gityo Momma.... "

THOU SHALL NOT EAT THYNEIGHBOR'S WIFE......'S POPCORN!

Page 13- Only Time Will Tell- if itwas time well spent.

“BUFFETTISM” "In four hundred words or less, this iswhat happened form earlyadolescence until now: I broke out ofthe grip of Catholicism and made it

through adolescence without killingmyself in a car. I flunked out ofcollege. I learned to play the guitar,lived on the beach, lived in the FrenchQuarter, finally got laid, and didn't goto Viet Nam. I got back into school,started a band, got a job on BourbonStreet, graduated from college,flunked my draft physical, broke upmy band, and went out on the roadsolo. I signed a record deal, gotmarried, moved to Nashville, had myguitars stolen, bought a Mercedes,worked at Billboard Magazine, putout my first album, went broke,wrecked the Mercedes, got divorced,and moved to Key West. I sang and worked on a fishing boat,went totally crazy, did a lot of dope,met the right girl, made anotherrecord, had a hit, bought a boat, andsailed away to the Caribbean. Istarted another band, worked theroad, had my second and last hit,bought a house in Aspen, startedspending summers in New England,got married, broke my leg three timesin one year, had a baby girl, mademore records, bought a bigger boat,and sailed away to St. Bart's. I gotseparated from the right girl, sold theboat, sold the house in Aspen, movedback to Key West, worked the road,and made more records. I rented anapartment in Paris, went to Brazil forCarnival, learned to fly, went intotherapy, quit doing dope, bought myfirst seaplane, flew all over theCaribbean, almost got a seconddivorce, moved to Malibu for moretherapy, and got back with the rightgirl.

I worked the road, moved back toNashville, took off in an F-14 from anaircraft carrier, bought a summerhome on Long Island, had anotherbaby girl. I found the perfect seaplaneand moved back to Florida. CameronMarley joined me in the house ofwomen. I built a home on Long Island,crashed the perfect seaplane, livedthrough it thanks to Navy training,tried to slow down a little, woke upone morning and I was looking atfifty, trying to figure what comesnext."JIMMY BUFFETT

At the Country Music Awards WHO’S THE Blonde Stranger???

Page 14- I'm just hanging on while thisold world keeps spinning.....

MOTM History Lesson

1933How long has Sloppy Joe’s been locatedat Duval and Greene Streets?Since 1937.Who said to Josie Russell (originalowner) “Joe you run a sloppy place, youshould call this place Sloppy Joe’s”?Ernest HemingwayWhat was the name of the 300-poundhearty black bartender at Sloppy Joe’s inthe ‘30s?"Big" Skinner

What era was ending when Sloppy Joe’sopened?ProhibitionInside Sloppy Joe's bar hangs a Cubanrecord Marlin caught by journalist andauthor Phil Caputo. How much does itweigh?569 pounds.Ernest Hemingway was born July 21,1899. Each year around the authorsbirthday Sloppy Joe’s hold what event?The Annual Hemingway Look-Alikecontest.True or False. Sloppy Joe’s has a menuwith quality, reasonably priced food.True.True or False. Sloppy Joe’s has liveentertainment.True. Live entertainment 365 days ayear, from Noon to 2:00am each day.Sloppy Joe’s Retail Shop has over ___souvenirs to choose from.Over 300 items.What event does Sloppy Joe’s hold eachOctober during Fantasy Fest?Sloppy Joe’s Annual Toga Party

Escape to Buffett's 'Salty' land

By Eric J. Blommel, Special to theNewsNovember 24, 2004

Jimmy Buffett, the singer-songwriterprobably most famous for his 1970s hitsong Margaritaville, delights andamuses with his new novel A Salty Pieceof Land.

In it he continues the tropical adventuresof Wyoming cowboy Tully Mars, whichhe began in Tales From Margaritaville.The mood is joyful and lighthearted.Both the plot and the characters arereplete with goofy, good-natured humor.Rather than the short-story format ofTales, A Salty Piece of Land is a full-length novel that recounts a series ofhappy accidents and the quest for a lightbulb. Well, not a light bulb exactly, but avery specific kind of kerosene-poweredlight source for lighthouses known as aFresnel lens. The quest doesn't actuallybegin until a third of the way into thebook. The story first centers on Tully'srun from the law. His legal troubles arethe result of a less-than-graceful meansof quitting his job in Wyoming. Hismaniacal ex-boss and poodle rancherThelma Barston not only trumps upcharges against him but sends bounty

"Don't try todescribe the ocean if you've never seenit”---Page 15

hunters after him. So, Tully makes hisway to the Yucatan Peninsula with his

horse Mr. Twain. The two of them catcha ride from Alabama on a convertedshrimp boat known as the CaribbeanSoul, which is owned and operated byone Capt. Kirk. On the way, Tully issurprised to encounter his country-musichero Willie Singer, who pulls up inanother boat looking for some freshshrimp. Almost upon arriving at PuntaMargarita, Tully lands a job as a fly-fishing guide, helping tourists fish theflats near the Lost Boys resort. He makesthe acquaintance of his co-guide andMayan shaman Ix-Nay, who becomes aconstant companion. After Tully'sformer girlfriend Donna Kaymysteriously arrives, delivers a shockingmessage and then leaves, Tully takes abreak to ponder his love life on thebeaches of Cancun. It's there he meetsthe Caribbean version of a fairygodmother in the guise of 103-year-oldsailboat captain Cleopatra Highbourne(who doesn't look a day over 80). Andon it goes, with a host of eccentriccharacters and adventures that willeventually take readers back to the questfor the kerosene-powered light source.Buffett's writing style has been describedas "tropical escapism." In the case of thismeandering plot, that phrase is perfectlyapt. The overall tone of good-natured funprobably makes these digressions notonly forgivable but desirable for mostBuffett readers. With his wit, humor andknack for telling a good yarn, Buffettmanages to deliver another salty piece oflife in the tropics to his fans. A SaltyPiece Of Land moved from #4 to number #7on the New York Times Bestseller List.That's 5 weeks in a row now to be on thebestseller list.

Hey Guys, Johnny Mon here. Just got backfrom the Keys. Man what an awesometrip it turned out to be. I'll get to therecipe soon enough. This is moreimportant. Connie and I arrived in KeyWest along with Susie, Ed, Becky, andMona. We checked in to the KnowlesHouse and then took off for the Casa toget our goody bags and check in. Thegoody bags were the best. They hadgoodies inside of them like J.B .for President ball caps, all kinds ofcoupons for the bars and restaurants, anda bottle of tequila. The Mini Mart waskick butt too. Well- we headed back tothe Knowles House and got ready to goout to dinner. We ended up at TurtleCrawls for some .33 steers. and somebrews. Then back to the Casa for somePeter Mayer jam session. That’s when ithappened. Peter said there would be achange in the line up and that he hope noone would mind, and then out walksJimmy Buffett. He was so close-- it beatany concert I've ever seen. I mean beingon the beach on the Atlantic Ocean andhaving J.B. on stage jamming with theboys 2 hrs. I might add he played 2hrs.He even did an acoustical set. To say theleast, that was most definitely thehighlight of our trip to the Keys. We hada great time with our group at theKnowles House.

Page 16“ If the phone doesn't ring, it's me”

I believe we had Bloody Mary’s everynight and day. I can't remember howmany of those I had over the course ofthe weekend. Oh the Jell-O shooters, twobatches-- geez they were right. Friday,we went to Finnegan’s Wake and haddinner with some of the gang. Saturday,we went out for breakfast at the BlueHeaven. The lobsters eggs benedictwere to die for. It cost a small ransombut it was goooood. We finally got to seea sunset on Sunday evening. We alsohung mileage sign to Augusta on thepost by Turtle Crawls. Kudos to Karl for bringing the screwgun. Thanks to Karl, Susan, John andBarbara for hauling our stuff down there.Well there’s so much tell but I'm suresome are Semi- True stories. All in all itwas a great trip with great friends havinggreat times. Johnny MonNow for the recipe--------------- JOHNNY MON’S GALLEY Tonight’s special will be a liking to all Ibelieve. Shrimp Victoria This dish will serve up to 6 people perbatch. List of ingredients: 1) 1 and 1/2 lbs of medium shrimp-peeled and deveined 2) 1 & 1/2 cup of sliced mushrooms(fresh) 3) 6- green onions diced 1/4 4) 1- cup of whipping cream 5) 1- table. spoon of real butter 6) 16- oz of sour cream 7) 1- lb of pasta or rice (which ever youprefer) I like pasta myself Well here we go!!!!!!!!!! First sauté the shrimp with butter tillthey are just about pink. Then add thegreen onions and mushrooms, salt andpepper to taste. Sautee those for anadditional minute or so just heat them.

Then add the whipping cream and thesour cream stirring slowly. Turn the heatdown and be careful not to boil as thesour cream will curdle. (Thus ruining the dish). While doing allof this, cook your pasta or rice then servehot over either. Well there you have itstrait from the Johnny Mon’s Galley.Happy Eating Everyone, hope you like it.

I’M GROWING OLDER BUTNOT UPQ: I've heard thatcardiovascular exercise canprolong life. Is this true? A: Your heart is only good for somany beats, and that's it...don'twaste them on exercise.Everything wears outeventually. Speeding up yourheart will not make you livelonger; that's like saying youcan extend the life of your carby driving it faster. Want to livelonger? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meatand eat more fruits andvegetables? A: You must grasp logisticalefficiencies. What does a coweat? Hay and corn. And whatare these? Vegetables. So asteak is nothing more than anefficient mechanism ofdelivering vegetables to yoursystem. Need grain? Page 17“You better lava me now or lava menot”

Eat chicken. Beef is also a goodsource of field grass (greenleafy vegetable). And a porkchop can give you 100% of your

recommended daily allowance ofvegetable products.

Q: Should I reduce my alcoholintake? A: No, not at all. Wine is madefrom fruit. Brandy is distilledwine, that means they take thewater out of the fruity bit so youget even more of the goodnessthat way. Beer is also made outof grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate mybody/fat ratio? A: Well, if you have a body andyou have body fat, your ratio isone to one. If you have twobodies, your ratio is two to one,etc.

Q: What are some of theadvantages of participating in aregular exercise program? A: Can't think of a single one, sorry.My philosophy is: No Pain...Good

Q: Aren't fried foods bad foryou? A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!Foods are fried these days invegetable oil. In fact, they'repermeated in it. How couldgetting more vegetables be badfor you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent mefrom getting a little soft aroundthe middle? A: Definitely not! When youexercise a muscle, it getsbigger. You should only be doingsit-ups if you want a biggerstomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me? A: Are you crazy? HELLO ....Cocoa Beans ... anothervegetable!! It's the best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for yourfigure? A: If swimming is good for yourfigure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape importantfor my lifestyle? A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!

Well, I hope this has cleared upany misconceptions you mayhave had about food and diets.

We received this email from Jake Taterof the Boats Drunks; some of us heardthem at the MOTM's. His uncle was killedin Iraq the same day they were playingthere. Date: Wed, 19 Jan 2005 15:03:19 +0000

Johnny and the Savannah RiverPHC~ Thank you so much foryour thoughts and prayersregarding my Uncle Mike. It wasa difficult holiday season for myfamily, but we’ve made itthrough and have a brand newyear ahead of us. The cards andemails from parrot heads allover the country have trulytouched me. I am convincedthat parrot heads are thekindest folks in the world! Myuncle Mike died happy—he waswhere he wanted to be doingwhat he wanted to do. I just askthat you pass along themessage that my uncle’spartner Page 18gave me… no matter how youfeel about the war, pleasesupport our men and womenfighting for us.

I hope to meet you all one day—if you ever catch our show,please introduce yourselves soI can thank you personally! Jake TatarThe Boat Drunkswww.boatdrunks.com

Boat Drunks at MOTM

My Reason For DrinkingBeerNATURAL SELECTION AT IT’SBEST—FROM THE EDITOR"Well you see Norm, it’s like this.....aherd of buffalo can only move as fast asthe slowest buffalo. And when the herdis hunted it is the slowest and weakestones at the back that are killed first. Thisnatural selection is good for the herd as awhole, because the general speed andhealth of the whole group keepsimproving by the regular killing off theweakest members. In much the same way, the human braincan only operate as fast as the slowestbrain cells. Now, as we know, excessiveintake of alcohol kills brain cells. Butnaturally it attacks the slowest andweakest brain cells first. In this way,regular consumption of beer eliminatesthe weaker brain cells, making the braina faster more efficient machine. And that Norm, is why you always feelsmarter after a few beers."

If you saw Jimmy and hecould only play 3 songs thatnight, what would yourchoices be?How beautiful it is to do nothing,then rest afterwards!

Jimmy is on the cover of Men'sJournal for January of '05 (Volume13 / Number 12)

Page 19Don't let tomorrow find you wishin'Boy you've got a missionShake it, rattle and roll

“ WE’RE GOING CONKY TONKIN”

Christmas Day 2004 – TheWeather Channel was calling for awinter storm warning. I knew thatit was time to hit the road. I loadedup the luggage, took Buffee &Colby to the sitter and off wewent. “I gotta go where it’s warm.”Made it almost to the Fla. line afterrunning into sleet and rain most ofthe way. Got up the next morningand continued our journey. Firston the agenda were some of theafter Christmas sales. This tooklonger than we realized. It wasgetting close to dark thirty so wedecided to stop for the night. I stillhad some lighthouse chasing todo: Hillsboro Inlet and then KeyBiscayne (they were worth the tripespecially Key Biscayne). Finallywe hit the Keys, first stopAlabama Jacks. As we weresitting there overlooking thewater, listening to the CaribbeanCowboys, two manatees justhappen to swim by. They were anawesome sight swimming ever sograceful. After eating some of thebest conch fritters in the world,we got back on the road again. Itwas almost dark and we weregetting disappointed about drivingthrough the Keys in the dark whenall of a sudden that changed. Westarted seeing all kinds ofChristmas lights and decorations;people go all out in the Keys,especially with the palm trees. Wefinally arrived at the KnowlesHouse about 9 PM Monday night. Ican’t begin to tell you how nicethis place is for those who havenot stayed there yet.

Les and Paul go out of their wayto make sure your stay iseverything you want it to be. Weliked it so much we have alreadymade reservations to go back inJune and again for MOTM. Thenext day, as we started the DuvalCrawl, we stumbled into CaptainTony’s Saloon. He just happenedto be there. He was so happy tosee the “Girls” again “you knowwhat I mean”. (Ha Ha) I got his autograph again butunfortunately it washed off. Thenext few days we toured KeyWest, the cemetery, Shrimp BoatSound and all of the other touristspots. On our last day there wetook a seaplane out to FortJefferson / Dry Tortugas. This wasso cool; I took some great aerialphotos of Key West, the FortJefferson Lighthouse and the DryTortugas Lighthouse. Landing onthe water was awesome, now Iknow why Buffett loves it somuch. I highly recommend thistrip for anyone going to Key West.It’s a little expensive but wellworth it. You know what Buffettsays “spend it while you canmoney’s contraband. You can’ttake it with you when you go”. Well that’s my story and I’msticking to it.Jana

Page 20

OH THE STORIES WE COULDTELL

We had only come for chicken.

Playing every Sunday at the OrangeGrove Stand

One has to learn fun is just smiling…

The skies over Cuba (Key West)-MOTM-2004

I think I’ve got a touch of island fever.

Enduring Echo’s- MCG Kids Gifts

Page 21

There’s no such thing as an easy run-I’m a tree top flyer.

The Polar Bear Express- Parrotheadsof the Savannah River Style- Jan. 1st.-2005. An Exclusive Club.

She’s got a passion for cookies

It was my first look-Aerial Key West

Rag Top Days

Thank God The Tiki Bars’ Still Open

Page 22

The Top Ten Reasons To Join TheParrot HeadS Of The SavannahRiver

We can look for that Lost Shaker of Salt together We never show up alone BUFFETT!!!!!! And all the crazy folks who understand our southeast of disorder ways! When we travel, we don't visit -- we start the party! Because a tropical state of mind is a terrible thing to waste Waste.Because there are never enough occasions/reasons to wear A coconut (s) bra. To get "Lei'd" often 'Cuz the world needs more Parrot Head excitement,and Jimmy only comes around once a year (we're luckier than most)! For the thrill of the fear that people will find out what WE are really like. and the number one reason to join the Parrot Heads... Party with a Purpose! What could be better?

1) Daiquiri A) Presents ToSend You

2) Scotch B) Landfall

3) Bloody Mary C) Changes InLatitudes...

4) Gin D) Brahma Fear5) Tequila E) Big Rig

6) RumF)Grapefruit/JuicyFruit

7) Pouilly Frusse G) The WeatherIs Her...

8) Red Wine H) Tryin' ToReason...

9) Whiskey I) When SalomePlays...

10) PinkChampagne

J) Son Of A SonOf A Sailor

THE ANSWERS TO THE LASTEDITIONS TRIVIA QUESTIONS

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Growing Older but not Up!

Jana Anderson - 1/5 John Creson- 1/27Carol Ayer - 1/31 Cindy Griffin -3/18Johnny Mon Johnson - 2/25Susie Sadowski - 3/14Becky Worthy - 1/18Karl Keene - 2/8Tom Watts - 2/9Deb Erickson- 3/26

If we left you out of our “GrowingOlder but not Up” – it’s because youdid not tell us – or as Karl’s versionreads —“I was sick that year , don’tcount it.”

Page 23

From the Editor

Thank you for allowing me tocumulate and edit this newsletter. Itallows me to come down and talk tome when the coast is clear. And aboveall it leaves meaningful tracks in mymind. Thanks to everyone for theircontributions and life stories. TheParrot Heads of the Savannah River isa very SPECIAL CLUB. We have alot of talent and dedication whichmakes us unique creatures of theearth.However, the fine print still remains:“If we print or photograph anythingthat should be offensive to you- Seeour attorney- “ Berney the Attorney-aka- Billy Clyde”. We only print whatwe see- your interpretation is yours. OUR ATTORNEY

Membership/DuesOur membership timeline is from January1st through December 31st. Unless youjoined in November or December, your duesfor 2005 are now due. If you do not pay up,this will be your last newsletter, and wewould hate for you to miss all the fun wehave planned this year, including our FirstAnnual Chili Cook-Off Contest, scheduled

for Sat. Feb. 5, beginning at 2 p.m. at Joe'sBar and Grill in New Ellenton (now calledMama Bear's). We hope to have linedancing lessons to Jimmy Buffet songs,silent and live auctions and other good stuff.So send me your money and the completedform below and then get out your cookbook! 2005 Membership Form (Please completethis mini-form, and send it with your checkfor $20-Single Membership OR $30-FamilyMembership to Susie Sadowski, 5 CypressLane, Aiken, SC 29803. Questions: CallSusie at 803-642-3778.)

1st Member Name:Birthday (Month and Day only. Year isoptional):Complete Address:Telephone Number:E-Mail:

2nd Member Name:Birthday (Month and Day only. Year isoptional):Complete Address:Telephone Number:E-Mail:

3rd Member Name:same info as above, pleaseWhen joining the Parrot Heads of theSavannah River, you agree to abide by theby-laws and guidelines of our organizationand will remain a member in good standing,respecting all guidelines and by-laws of thePHIP (our parent organization).Office Use: Date Form and Dues Received: Cash Received in the Amount of: Check Received in the Amount of: Check No: Date Money Forwarded toTreasurer: Other:Thanks, Susie

Page 24- “Sometimes, I may be sarcastic-most times that’s the way the story goes”.From-----12 Volt Man.

Anchors and Bouys ( Our ODDS AND ENDS )

1. Embroidery items- jackets-$20, hats-$10 etc. If you havequestions about anyembroidery items, pleasecontact Susie Sadowski.

2. Hey Everyone, We’re very excited to announce that ThePeter Mayer Group will be at Parrotstock this year! We have anexcellent line up of entertainmentincluding The Caribbean Cowboys withMatt Sluder, Joe Bennett, Erik Smith, TheRockafellas and Rodger Harrison. Wehave negotiations under way with acouple of other Entertainment Groups aswell. When we have confirmation, I'll passthe word on. Parrotstock will be held June 9-12 inMyrtle Beach at The Ocean Dunes Resort. We have great games planned,a balcony decorating contest, hula girls,a Saturday morning partywith entertainment and free adultbeverages and many more funactivities planned. A Logo design contestis underway. Please send all logos to myemail address at _mlfanalyst@aol.com_(mailto:mlfanalyst@aol.com). The winnerof our logo design contest will have freeregistration and your design featured onthe official Parrotstock T-shirt andbadge. The Board of Directors forParrotstock will be judging the entries.So, put your creative mind to work andgive us your interpretation of Parrotstockin Myrtle Beach, South Carolina! I knowyour Guys can come up with somegreat ideas! The deadline in April 15th. Registration for Parrotstock will closeMay 5th and the rooms blocked at The Ocean Dunes

Resort will be released that date as well. All rooms in the PS block are 134.00.This includes, Ocean Front rooms, OceanView suites and Villas. The rate willreturn to 160-170 after May 5th. Three days of Entertainment and fun inbeautiful Myrtle Beach South Carolina. This promises to be a party you won'twant to miss!Please see_www.parrotstock.com_(http://www.parrotstock.com/) for more information. PS.The New CIP andMargaritaville are great! I visited themboth this weekend! Mary FisherParrotstock Director

WE Welcome You Aboard

Our New Members:• John Creson- Happy Birthday• Chris Garner• Doug and Cindy Griffin-

Happy Birthday Cindy

From Barbara: Our QuarterlyMental Floss ----“Life should not be ajourney to the grave with the intentionof arriving safely in an attractive andwell preserved body, but rather toslide in sideways, chocolate in onehand, margarita in the other, bodythoroughly used up, totally worn outscreaming----WOO HOO- What ARide!!!!!!

Page 25"This world is full of strange behavior.Every man has to be his own savior. Iknow I can make it on my own if I try, butI'm searchin' for a great heart to stand meby.