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1 November 1999: Issue 1155
: ' 1 busies
on
Fight clubs force Union shut-down A N D R E W OFOR I
S tudents in D B s o n W e d n e s d a y 2 0
O c t o b e r w e r e s u b j e c t e d to p a r t i c -
u lar l y l ively f o r m of e n t e r t a i n m e n t
as a b r a w l o n the s t a g e c l o s e d the
U n i o n early.
A p a c k e d v e n u e d e s c e n d e d
in to a n a r c h y as s p o r t s t e a m s
c l a s h e d . T h e l i c e n s e e s t o o k the
d e c i s i o n to c l o s e the U n i o n at
1 2 . 4 5 a m as the s i t u a t i o n b e c a m e
u n s a f e . The s t ewa rds du l y r e s t o r e d
a f r a g i l e c a l m a n d the U n i o n w a s
c l e a r e d .
T h e f i gh t b r o k e o u t w h e n
p u s h i n g a n d s h o v i n g b e t w e e n
spor t s t e a m s led to t e m p e r s f l a r i ng
o n s t age . T h e first un fo r t una t e
w a s a p e a c e m a k e r , w h o w a s struck
as he t r i ed to d e f u s e the s i t ua t i on
l e a d i n g to t w o s p o r t s m e n tu s s l i ng .
S t ewa rds spl i t up the p a i r on l y f o r
the f ight to e s c a l a t e to a n a l t e r c a -
t i o n b e t w e e n r o w e r s a n d f o o t -
b a l l e r s .
T h e s i t u a t i o n e r u p t e d o n c e
a g a i n o u t s i d e the U n i o n a n d c o l -
l e g e secur i ty we re c a l l e d to d e a l
w i th the i n c i d e n t . O n e s p o r t s m a n
e n d e d the n igh t with a b r o k e n
n o s e p r e c l u d i n g h i m f r o m a l l his
t e a m ' s m a t c h e s s i nce the event . A
f o o t b a l l e r c o m m e n t e d " T h e w h o l e
t h i n g was a d i s g r a c e . "
A n o t h e r s p o r t s m a n a d d e d , "I
d idn ' t k n o w w h a t w a s g o i n g o n , it
a l l just b l ew up . A l l I d i d w a s try to
s t o p my m a t e d e c k i n g s o m e
b l o k e "
M a r k H o m e , the Ents a n d
M a r k e t i n g M a n a g e r felt the I C U
s t e w a r d s h a d f o l l o w e d p r o d u r e
a n d re fu ted c l a i m s that s o m e i n d i -
v i d u a l s h a d b e e n t rea ted ha rsh l y
" S t e w a r d s a r e the r e f o r p e o p l e ' s
safety a n d o c c a s i o n a l l y tha t m e a n s
b r e a k i n g u p a f i g h t "
H e w e n t o n to say " I t 's a
s h a m e ; b e c a u s e of a s m a l l g r o u p
of p e o p l e w e h a d to shut the n ight
d o w n , but w e h a d to g i ve c o n s i d -
e r a t i o n t o p e o p l e in t he r e . I h o p e it
w o n ' t be r e p e a t e d . "
The ma t t e r is cur rent l y b e i n g
dea l t with by the l i c ensees . A
n u m b e r of p e o p l e h a v e b e e n t e m -
p o r a r i l y b a n n e d f r o m the U n i o n as
a n i n v e s t i g a t i o n in to the i n c i d e n t is
c a r r i e d ou t .
Contractor cock-up causes costly computer chaos
GARETH M O R G A N
S u b s t a n t i a l d a m a g e w a s c a u s e d
to the D e p a r t m e n t o f C o m p u t i n g ' s
new c o m p u t e r l a b by a f l o o d last
w e e k e n d .
B u i l d e r s w o r k i n g o n the M a t h s
l i b r a r y in the H u x l e y b u i l d i n g
n e e d e d to r e m o v e a n d r e p l a c e a
w a t e r p i p e , s o f r o z e it w h i l e they
w o r k e d . U n f o r t u n a t e l y the p i p e
c o n t a i n e d ho t w a t e r w h i c h m e l t e d
the i c e , a n d a l a r g e v o l u m e of
w a t e r e s c a p e d b e f o r e it c o u l d b e
t u r n e d off.
S t u d i o B, w h i c h o n l y o p e n e d
at the e n d of S e p t e m b e r , s u f f e r ed
m o s t o f the d a m a g e - " A d i s a s t e r "
a c c o r d i n g to D e p u t y D e p a r t m e n -
tal A d m i n i s t r a t o r A n n e O ' N e i l l , as
this is D O C ' s m a i n t e a c h i n g l a b .
Roofing looking decidedly soggy
Lab 2 0 6 , a n o t h e r t e a c h i n g l a b o -
ratory , w a s a l s o d a m a g e d . T h e r e
Photo: Joel
a re a l s o repor t s o f d a m a g e to
l o w e r l eve l s , a l t h o u g h this h a d not
b e e n c o n f i r m e d as Fel ix wen t to
p ress .
B u i l d i n g c o n t r a c t o r s A B B a re
cur ren t l y a s s e s s i n g the d a m a g e ,
but Peter S c h r e i b e r , Pro jects C o -
o r d i n a t o r in the Estates d i v i s i o n
w a s u n f o r t u n a t e l y no t a v a i l a b l e to
c o m m e n t .
R e m e d i a l a c t i o n has s e e n a
n u m b e r o f i n d u s t r i a l hea te r s d r a f t -
ed in to s p e e d up the d r y i n g
p r o c e s s , w h i l e a n u m b e r o f the
c o m p u t e r s h a v e b e e n p r o t e c t e d .
O n e b e m u s e d D O C s tuden t
s a i d "I w o n d e r w h a t the h e l p d e s k
w o u l d h a v e s a i d if I h a d r a n g up
a n d c o m p l a i n e d tha t my m o t h e r -
b o a r d w a s s q u l e c h i n g . "
The extent of the d a m a g e a n d
the p o s s i b l e r e p a i r b i l l c o u l d be
h u g e .
2 s x
The Notional Union of Students -
o n t o
H I i
Buying beau: we investi-
• • .. .
thMtsslfSiiirfoilld^ il^;
l l l n i o n
Ji jhi i O' 1 • 'i 1 1 1 1 i' • - communi-
cation: front.
Columns
week's
the directors of the Wi tch Pr
S ill • V ^ i '
G l i d i n g , moun ta inee r ing a n d
Rad io d r o p by to soy " h i " .
We ' re
Commemoration Day '99 DAVID ROBERTS
C o m m e m o r a t i o n D a y p a s s e d off
o n c e a g a i n without any real note ,
save the a n n u a l invas ion of ex-stu-
dents in strange outfits c l o g g i n g up
the c a m p u s last Wednesday .
The g r a d u a t i o n ceremony , wh i ch
c o m m e m o r a t e s the visit of K i n g
G e o r g e VI a n d Q u e e n El izabeth in
1 9 4 8 to ce lebrate the centenary of
the Roya l S c h o o l of Chemis t r y ,
p a s sed off wi thout a hitch, a n d was if
anyth ing slightly shorter than last
year ' s p r o g r a m m e . As well as the
1 3 0 0 o r so graduates w h o were
p a r a d e d in front of the C h a i r m a n of
G o v e n o r s , the a f te rnoon a l s o i n c l ud-
ed the presentat ion of four new H o n -
orary C o l l e g e Fe l lows, a n d the c o m -
m e m o r a t i o n of the fiftieth anniversary
of the f o u n d a t i o n of the C o l l e g e
Cho i r .
The day cu lm ina t ed with the
C o m m e m o r a t i o n Ba l l , o rgan i s ed for
This year's graduate await their fifteen minutes of fame Photo: Jonas
the g r a d u a t e s by the U n i o n .
A l t h o u g h this t oo passed without any
notab le inc ident it c o u l d prove m e m -
orab l e in future years as the last ever
Ball of it's type. A t h o r o u g h review is
cur rent l y u n d e r w a y to e x a m i n e
whether the U n i o n c a n truly support
both this event a n d the S u m m e r Ball
(for more detai ls see this week ' s State
of the U n i o n o n p a g e 9).
In Brief C H A R I N G C R O S S SALE
Ru m ou r s have b e e n f lying r o u n d the
o f f i ce ' of U n i o n hacks al l week
r e g a r d i n g a poss ib l e shake up at
C h a r i n g C r o s s l ibrary.
A l t h o u g h no th ing conc re te has
b e e n sa id the of f ic ia l l ine is that the
a d m i n i s t r a t i o n a r e " r e v i e w i n g
s p a c e " with a poss ib l e v iew to m o v -
ing two f loors of journa ls a n d p e r i -
o d i c a l s d o w n to the b a s e m e n t of the
m a i n b u i l d i n g into the s p a c e that is
current ly o c c u p i e d by the U n i o n .
Pr imary C a r e w o u l d most l ikely
t ake ove r the s p a c e left.
N a t a s h a N e w t o n , U n i o n Presi-
dent , a n d Becky E n g l a n d , I C S M S U
President , a re p l a n n i n g to meet with
the adm in i s t r a t i on at C h a r i n g X o n
the 2 9 t h to get a better i d e a of what
is h a p p e n i n g .
It is un l ike ly that e i ther St M a r y ' s
o r C h e l s e a a n d W e s t m i n s t e r ' s
l ibrarys wi l l b e sub jec ted to s im i l a r
rev iews.
WAIVERS WAR
A c c o r d i n g to the A U T last M o n d a y
was a W O W day. It formed part of
the c a m p a i g n aga in s t university staff
hav ing to rout ine ly s ign away their
e m p l o y m e n t rights. The W i p e O u t
Wa i v e r s day c o i n c i d e d with the
re lease of the E m p l o y m e n t Re lat ions
A c t 1 9 9 9 . The A U T have n o w
p u s h e d for current wa ivers s i gned
by staff to be r e v o k e d . The g e n e r a l
secretary of the A s s o c i a t i o n c o m -
men ted "This is a n issue of fa i rness .
N o staff in H i g h e r E d u c a t i o n s h o u l d
ever be o b l i g e d to s igh away their
e m p l o y m e n t r ights . "
C & G U N IGHT B O M B S
Ci ty & G u i l d s U n i o n he ld the i r
t h e m e d Star W a r s night last Fr iday
in the J C R . It w a s i n t e n d e d to
rep l a ce last yea r ' s b o a t party w h i c h
f l o p p e d in s p e c t a c u l a r fashion. The
e n g i n e e r s o r g a n i s e d a c a s i n o ,
d i s c o , ba r a n d a b i g sc reen p l a y i ng
the entire series of Lucas ' s p a c e
o p e r a . Desp i te a n impress ive poster
c a m p a i g n f e a t u r i n g T a r a n t i n o -
e s q u e m i s q u o t e s the event was
repor ted to have f l o p p e d with on l y
3 5 - 4 0 p e o p l e t u r n i n g u p . The
C & G U Pres ident , D i n e s h G a n e -
sa r a j ah , admi t t ed the event h a d
m a d e a loss of £ 3 6 6 , a n d c o u l d
offer n o exp l an a t i o n for the l ow
turnout . H e d i d not think the £5
ticket pr ice o r the h igh m a l e - f e m a l e
rat io in G u i l d s w a s to b l a m e a n d
a d d e d that the p e o p l e p resen t
s e e m e d to have en j o ye d the night.
" W e m a y have suf fered a m i n o r
se tback , but it is hard ly s ign i f i cant in
v iew of C & G U ' s largest venture this
t e rm , the Freshers D i n n e r " c o m -
m e n t e d Mr . G a n e s a r a j a h . " Th i s
event has a s t rong reputa t ion a n d is
a perfect i n t roduc t i on to this U n i o n .
I a m c o n f i d e n t we wil l not see a
repea t o f the Stars W a r s n ight a n d
the pre-sa le b o o k i n g s a re g iv ing
ea r l y i n d i c a t i o n of yet a n o t h e r
s t o r m i n g n igh t . "
A C C E S S T O W O R K
The restr ict ions o n in te rna t iona l s tu-
dents w o r k i n g wh i l e s tudy ing in the
U K have b e e n e a s e d . O v e r s e a s
students w h o are not na t iona l s of
the E u r o p e a n E c o n o m i c A r e a a re
no l o n g e r r equ i r ed to ind iv idua l l y
o b t a i n the p e r m i s s i o n of the Sec re-
tary of State fo r E d u c a t i o n a n d
E m p l o y m e n t .
T h e a s s e s s m e n t o f s tuden t s '
f i n a n c i a l m e a n s by U K i m m i g r a t i o n
has a l so b e e n a l t e r ed . Part-time
work at a h ighe r o r further e d u c a -
t ion institute is not t aken into c o n -
s ide ra t i on
1 s 3
Nobel Peace Prizewinner launches lecture series
CARSTEN ROHR
W h a t w o u l d you d o if s o m e o n e
a s ke d you to bu i ld a n u c l e a r b o m b ?
This is not a ques t i on that m a n y
of us are l ikely to cons ide r , but last
M o n d a y , N o b e l l au rea te Sir J o s e p h
Rotblat sha r ed his t hough t s , e x p e r i -
ences a n d mot i va t i on fo r e m b a r k -
ing a n d s u b s e q u e n t l y r e s i g n i n g
f r om the a t o m i c b o m b pro jec t d u r -
ing the S e c o n d W o r l d War .
Born in 1 9 0 8 , Sir J o s e p h spent
his first thirty years in P o l a n d be fo re
m o v i n g to L i ve rpoo l to work o n
n e u t r o n s c a t t e r i n g u n d e r J a m e s
C h a d w i c k . D u r i n g his t ime at Liver-
p o o l a n d a l m o s t s i m u l t a n e o u s l y
with o t h e r g r o u p s , S i r J o s e p h
d e d u c e d the c h a i n - r e a c t i o n f o r
n u c l e a r f i ss ion a n d b e c a m e a w a r e
of the e n o r m o u s quant i ty of ene rgy
that c o u l d be r e l e a s e d . H e s p o k e
with C h a d w i c k o v e r the poten t i a l
uses of such a n energy s o u r c e a n d
a g r e e d that it c o u l d b e c o m e a
potent ia l l y devas t a t i ng w e a p o n .
Short ly after Sir J o seph ' s d i s c o v -
ery, w a r b r o k e ou t in E u r o p e .
A t o m i c scientists in the U S A wrote to
Pres ident Rooseve l t , w a r n i n g of the
d a n g e r s p o s e d by a G e r m a n a t o m -
ic w e a p o n a n d u rg ing h im to funne l
r e s e a r c h in to m a k i n g a n a l l i e d
a t o m i c b o m b . Rooseve l t g a v e his
c o n s e n t to the pro ject , c o d e - n a m e d
the " M a n h a t t a n Pro jec t " , o n e day
be fo re the Pearl H a r b o u r b o m b i n g .
U n d e r the d i rec t ion of Robert J
O p p e n h e i m e r , the p ro j e c t w a s
b a s e d at Los A l a m o s , N e w M e x i c o
a n d c a l l e d a l m o s t every t op- rank ing
a l l i ed scientist to its c a u s e .
Sir J o s e p h a g r e e d with the p r o -
ject 's m o t i v a t i o n , that it was vital
that the a l l ies d e v e l o p a n a t o m i c
w e a p o n be fo re the N a z i s , to sa fe-
g u a r d d e m o c r a c y aga in s t the worst
k ind of to ta l i t a r i an i sm. Howeve r ,
w h e n in te l l igence sources r evea l ed
that the G e r m a n project was f l o u n -
d e r i n g , the mot i va t ion to bu i ld the
b o m b c h a n g e d a n d Sir J o s e p h t o o k
the u n p o p u l a r d e c i s i o n to res ign .
H is c o l l e a g u e s pre fer red to stay
until the first test h a d been c o m p l e t -
e d , yet most later vo ted aga in s t
d i rec t ing the b o m b u p o n c iv i l i an
targets. By that s tage the b o m b h a d
b e c o m e a po l i t i ca l a n d mil itary c o n -
ce rn .
Sir J o s e p h m o v e d into m e d i c a l
physics whe re he c o n t i n u e d his d i s-
t i ngu i shed c a r e e r a n d spent m u c h
of his t ime c a m p a i g n i n g for p r a c t i -
ca l a n d soc ia l l y r e spons ib l e a p p l i -
ca t ions of s c i ence . H e is the only
surv iv ing s ignatory of the Russell-
E ins te in m a n i f e s t o , a d o c u m e n t
wh i ch led to a mee t ing of scientists
in a sma l i C a n a d i a n t o w n , P u g -
w a s h , to d iscuss the ro le of s c i ence
a n d w o r l d affa irs . S ince t h en , the
" P u g w a s h C o n f e r e n c e s " h a v e
b e c o m e a n inf luent ia l b o d y of e m i -
nent scientists that con t i nue to v o i c e
o p i n i o n s u p o n the a p p l i c a t i o n of
sc i ence today. It was Sir J o seph ' s
efforts that e a r n e d h im the N o b e l
Peace Prize, toge the r with the P u g -
w a s h o r g a n i s a t i o n in 1 9 9 5 .
In the s a m e spir i t , a " S tudent
P u g w a s h " g r o u p has b e e n set up at
Imper ia l C o l l e g e a n d Sir J o seph ' s
lecture m a r k e d the first in a series of
lec tures , a i m e d at e x p l o r i n g the
soc i a l r espons ib i l i t i es of scientists.
The g r o u p wil l be act ively i nvo l ved
in the f o r t h c o m i n g Pugwash C o n f e r -
e n c e o n S c i e n c e a n d W o r l d Affa irs
he ld in C a m b r i d g e in A u g u s t 2 0 0 0 ,
a n event that d r aws inf luent ia l s c i -
entists f r o m a r o u n d the w o r l d . The
next lec ture wi l l be g i ven by Dr.
J o h n H a s s a r d f r o m the Phys ics
D e p a r t m e n t a n d prev ious ly of the
Roya l C o m m i s s i o n o n N u c l e a r
Energy. H e wil l s p e a k o n " W i l l C l i -
m a t e C h a n g e Dr ive N u c l e a r Prolif-
e r a t i o n ? " at 1 p m o n Thu r sday 4th
N o v e m b e r in the U n i o n D i n i n g
H a l l .
W e e k l y mee t i ngs a re o n Thu r s-
days at 1 p m in the B rown c o m m i t -
tee r o o m , a n d eve ryone is w e l -
c o m e ! . M o r e i n f o r m a t i o n o n the
s o c i e t y c a n be f o u n d at
w w w . s u . i c . a c . u k / p u g w a s h .
Overseas Societies
Comittee elected at last
DINESH GANESARAJAH
O n the 5th at tempt to ho ld e lec t ions
for a new c o m m i t t e e fo r the 1 9 9 9 /
2 0 0 0 A c a d e m i c year, the O v e r s e a s
Students C o m m i t t e e ( O S C ) s eems
to f inal ly have a set of off icers to
represent the ove rseas soc iet ies of
Imper i a l C o l l e g e U n i o n . S e n
G a n e s h was v ic tor ious in w i n n i n g
the O S C C h a i r , with M o g a i n i n g
V i c e - C h a i r a n d S a c h i n a t t a i n i ng
Treasurer. The prev ious efforts to
ho ld e lec t ions h a d b e e n unsucces s-
ful d u e to the low turnout o f e l ig ib le
voters (the cha i rs o f the i nd i v i dua l
O S C societ ies) .
W i th 3 0 % of Imper ia l C o l l e g e
m a d e up fo re ign s tudents , O S C is
seen as p l ay ing a n impor t an t ro le in
Imper ia l C o l l e g e . The h igh l igh t of
the O S C c a l e n d a r has a lways been
Internat ional N i g h t , w h i c h in recent
years has c o n t i n u e d to consistent ly
m a k e heavy losses. Trad i t iona l l y a
f o o d fa i r f o l l o w e d by a s h o w a n d
d i s c o , Internat ional N igh t is the o n e
o c c a s i o n whe re overseas societ ies
are g iven the oppor tun i ty to reveal
their cul ture to the rest of Imper ia l .
Howeve r , there have even been
sugges t i ons that a n o t h e r d isaster
wil l spel l the end of this a n n u a l
event.
In this l ight, the new commi t t ee
wil l have a t o u g h task a h e a d . N o w
that the new a c a d e m i c yea r is fully
u n d e r way, with the new personne l
on ly hav ing b e e n e lec ted recently,
the c h a l l e n g e fo r the new c o m m i t -
tee l ooks to be even tougher . The
c h a l l e n g e s wi l l i n c l u d e p l a y i n g
ca t ch up to b e c o m i n g f inanc ia l l y
t r a ined a n d versed in the b u r e a u -
cracy of I C U , as wel l as i m p r o v i n g
c o m m u n i c a t i o n be tween the O S C
g r o u p a n d its soc ie t ies , the lack of
wh i ch has b e e n the very r eason fo r
the late e lec t ions . W i th Internat ional
N i g h t just ove r 3 months away, the
1 9 9 9 / 2 0 0 0 A c a d e m i c year l ooks
to be a n interest ing o n e fo r O S C .
Undergraduate
Research
Opportunities
Programme
• Undergraduates assist academic staff with their
researches
• Directory of 1999-2000 opportunities available from
Room 313C Mechanical Engineering
• Information meeting (including Delaware,USA,
exchange scheme) Wednesday, 3 November 13.15 -
14.00 Room 342 Mechanical Engineering Building
• Discover more on http://www.hu.ic.ac.uk/urop/
Help academic staff and help your career:
Join U R O P now
HU
Them and NUS DAVID ROBERTS
A s we a l l (hopeful ly ) know , Imper i a l
C o l l e g e isn't a f f i l i a t e d t o the
N a t i o n a l U n i o n of S tudents . W h y
not? Af ter a l l , p rac t i ca l l y every o t h e r
c o l l e g e a n d univers i ty u n i o n in the
coun t r y is a m e m b e r , [with the
e x c e p t i o n of mos t of the Scot t i sh
H i g h e r E d u c a t i o n inst i tut ions (of
wh i ch m o r e later) a n d , as of last
m o n t h , U M I S T ] , yet s i n c e the
1 9 3 0 ' s Imper ia l C o l l e g e U n i o n has
b e e n a m e m b e r fo r a g r a n d tota l of
six years . [ ICU last left in 1 9 7 9 ,
w h e n Trevor Phi l l ips (a f o r m e r I C U
P res iden t a n d p o t e n t i a l D e p u t y
M a y o r of London ) was l e a d i n g the
N U S ] .
s
Re-aff i l iat ing to the N U S w o u l d cos t
I C U be tween £ 2 0 K a n d £ 5 0 K a
year, d e p e n d i n g o n w h o y o u ta lk to ,
but in a l l p robab i l i t y the f ina l f i gu re
w o u l d be a r o u n d £ 3 0 0 0 0 . H o w e v -
er, that's on l y a fifth of w h a t we pay
the Univers i ty of L o n d o n U n i o n , o r
3 % of the Un ion ' s tota l C o l l e g e
grant , s o is it real ly that m u c h ?
W e l l , f r o m a cos t e f fec t i veness
po in t of v iew, m e m b e r s h i p of the
N U S pr imar i l y m e a n s m e m b e r s h i p
of N U S S L ( N U S Serv ices Ltd), w h i c h
is r e g a r d e d by most s tudents un i ons
as the m a i n r e a s o n fo r s tay ing wi th
the n a t i o n a l body . N U S S L is e f f ec-
t ive ly a p u r c h a s i n g c o n s o r t i u m
w h i c h a l l o w s u n i o n s a c c e s s t o
c h e a p supp l i e s of beer , s tat ionary ,
f o o d , sports kit a n d o t h e r s tudent
staples - in o t h e r w o r d s it's the r e a -
son that s tudent ba rs up a n d d o w n
the count ry m a n a g e to k e e p the i r
pr ices so low. It's a l s o the r e a s o n
that the Scott ish univers i t ies d e c i d e d
to l eave the n a t i o n a l b o d y - as they
weren't a l l o w e d to d isa f f i l i a te f r o m
o n e w i thout a u t o m a t i c a l l y qu i t t ing
the other, they r e s i g n e d f r o m the
N U S as a w h o l e in protest .
Howeve r , b a r pr i ces at) IC a re
as low as any o t h e r s tudent b a r in
L o n d o n - so d o e s IC subs id i s e it's
pr ices o r buy it's b e e r o n the b l a c k
marke t ? N o , it's m u c h s i m p l e r -
ins tead of r ig idly a d h e r i n g to o n e
c o n s o r t i u m I C U uses a mixture of
N o r t h e r n Se rv i ces (a p u r c h a s i n g
g r o u p set u p by the Scot t i sh s tu-
dents u n i o n s , w h i c h a n y o n e c a n
jo in fo r a tiny fee) , T U C O (the C o l -
lege p u r c h a s i n g g roup ) a n d l o c a l
c o n s o r t i u m s , a n d c o n s e q u e n t l y
gets , by a n d l a rge , the s a m e (if not
better) pr ices t han every o ther u n i o n
in the country.
n
O K , so what 's the po in t of h a v i n g a
n a t i o n a l r ep resen ta t i ve b o d y f o r
any g r o u p of p e o p l e ? To exert
p o w e r at the h ighes t leve ls , push fo r
the rights of it's m e m b e r s , ensu re
fa i r a n d e q u a l t rea tment a n d p r o -
v ide a system of suppo r t a n d t r a i n -
i n g , r ight? In theory, that's exact ly
wha t the N U S is s u p p o s e d to d o . In
reality, however , it's c a m p a i g n i n g
r e c o r d in recent years has b e e n less
t han e n v i a b l e . O p p o s i t i o n to fees
w a s so bad l y o r g a n i s e d a n d inef-
fect ive it has p r o v o k e d d a m n a t i o n
f r o m every sec to r of H i g h e r E d u c a -
t i o n . O p p o s i t i o n to the a b o l i t i o n of
g ran ts w a s e q u a l l y non-ex is tent ,
a n d it's on ly now, with the dec i s i on s
in p l a c e a n d a l m o s t ent irely u n a l -
t e r a b l e , that m a r c h e s a n d d e m o n -
strat ions of a n y note a re b e g i n n i n g
to fi lter t h r o u g h f r o m the l e ade r -
sh ip . N o n e t h e l e s s , n a t i o n a l r epre-
sen ta t i on a n d c a m p a i g n i n g is a n
essent ia l r e q u i r e m e n t if we a re to
have any input in the way H i g h e r
E d u c a t i o n is run in the next m i l l e n -
n i a - so w o u l d n ' t it be better to be
o n the i n s ide ? The diff iculty is that
the p r o b l e m with N U S is e n d e m i c
ra ther t han i ssue-spec i f i c . Unt i l the
ent i re na t i ona l s tudent m o v e m e n t
u n d e r g o e s a r a d i c a l s h a k e - u p ,
n o t h i n g ' s g o i n g to c h a n g e . . .
So wha t the p r o b l e m ? Lack of
c o m m u n i c a t i o n ? P o o r m a r k e t i n g
a n d PR? O r is it s imply the c a s e that
the N U S l e a d e r s h i p puts it's po l i t i ca l
g o a l s a h e a d of the n a t i o n a l student
interest. The fact that w h e n , in the
last r o u n d of e l e c t i ons , N U S Presi-
den t A n d r e w Pakes was re turned fo r
a s e c o n d te rm by a n a r r o w m a r g i n ,
it t h r e a t e n e d to be the first t ime in
seven teen years that L a b o u r S tu-
dents (the youth w i n g of the L a b o u r
party) h a d not c o n t r o l l e d N U S is
p r o b a b l y a s t rong s ign of the po l i t i -
ca l na ture of the o r g a n i s a t i o n . A n d
whi lst any k ind of po l i t i ca l ag i t a t i o n
is g o i n g to s e e m f o r e i g n to p r o u d -
to-be-apo l i t i c a l IC , the s h e a r level
of beh ind-the-scenes m a c h i n a t i o n s
o r g a n i s e d by M r Pakes s h o c k e d the
entire N U S C o n f e r e n c e . In a d e s -
pera te a t tempt to c l i ng to p o w e r v i a
spl inter sec t ions of the L a b o u r b l o c k
vo te , M r Pakes w i thd rew the L a b o u r
S tudent e n d o r s e m e n t f r o m severa l
of his c o l l e a g u e s a n d p a s s e d it o n t o
a set of h a n d p i c k e d p u p p e t s c h o -
sen f r o m the key inst i tut ions a n d
vo t ing g r o u p s . H e is now, of c o u r s e ,
t i pped fo r a very s en io r job in the
L a b o u r Party's next e l e c t i on c a m -
p a i g n ( another interest ing statistic
shows that after the last e l e c t i o n
there were s ixteen di f ferent L a b o u r
M P s w h o h a d prev ious l y he ld the
pos i t i on of N U S Pres ident . . . ) .
s
Bas ica l ly , they ' r e aren ' t any a l t e r n a -
tives. Trades U n i o n ' s in g e n e r a l
don ' t t end to w o r k o n a c o m p e t i -
t ive, free marke t bas is - after a l l ,
wha t k ind of na t i ona l r e p r e s e n t a -
t ion c o u l d be a c h i e v e d if there were
two na t i ona l b o d i e s c a m p a i g n i n g
in o p p o s i n g d i r ec t i ons . The on ly
b o d y that c o m e s c l o se is the A l d -
w y c h G r o u p , w h o s e a i m s , o b j e c -
tives a n d m e m b e r s h i p a r e very dif-
ferent . For starters, the G r o u p was
set up to represen t the students of
the " b e t t e r " univers i t ies ( a l though
recent L e a g u e t ab les m ight di f fer
subs tant i a l l y with the identi t ies of
the f i f teen m e m b e r s ) a n d has as it's
p r imary ob jec t i ve the a v o i d a n c e of
t o p - u p , means- tes ted a n d tutor ia l
fees fo r h o m e s tudents . M o r e o v e r ,
a l t h o u g h I C U is a m e m b e r (as
m e m b e r s h i p is free) , the A l d w y c h
G r o u p ' s r e c o r d o n s e c u r i n g c o n -
crete a c c o m p l i s h m e n t s is n o m o r e
impress i ve t han that of the N U S
itself.
Effectively, I C U d o e s n ' t n e e d to
af f i l ia te to the N U S in the ful l
k n o w l e d g e tha t the N U S c a m -
p a i g n s (howeve r ineffectively) o n
be h a l f o f it's s tudents anyway. Put
s imply , n o t h i n g wi l l c h a n g e until a n
a p p r e c i a b l e n u m b e r of u n i o n s
l eave N U S - a n d c o n s i d e r i n g the
n u m b e r of s t u m b l i n g b l o c k s that the
l eade r s of the n a t i o n a l b o d y t end to
put in the way of po ten t i a l leavers ,
such a n o u t c o m e is m o r e than
unl ikely, at least in the shor t t e rm .
For n o w we ' l l just con t i nue to sit
happ i l y o n the o u t s i d e , awa i t i ng
d e v e l o p m e n t s .
FELIX NEEDS YOU
E
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,
,
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E
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Last week, amidst a storm of media and scientific controversy,
auction site ronsangels.com went on-line, attracting over a
million hits in it's first day alone. Rather than selling household
goods, antiques or bric-a-brac, ronsangels.com is exclusively
dedicated to the sale of human eggs and sperm from Ameri-
can models. Is it moral? Is it legal? Is it ethical? Above all, is it
true? David Roberts investigates.
T h a n k s to r e f o r m e d p o r n o g r a p h e r Ron H a r r i s , y ou i n c r ea s e the succes s of y o u r c h i l d r e n f o r centur ies to
n o w h a v e the o p p o r t u n i t y to buy beau ty f o r y o u r ch i l- c o m e . . . a n y gift that c a n be i m p a r t e d , such as beauty ,
d r e n . Fork ou t e n o u g h c a s h (anyth ing up to a qua r t e r i n t e l l i g ence o r s o c i a l sk i l l s , wi l l h e l p y o u r c h i l d r e n in
of a m i l l i o n do l l a r s ) a n d , a c c o r d i n g to M r H a r r i s , y o u r the i r ques t f o r h a p p i n e s s a n d s u c c e s s " . H e ' s a d a m a n t
c h i l d r e n c a n be the s u p e r m o d e l s o f t o m o r r o w . T h e r e ' s that f o c u s i n g ent i re ly o n l o o k s at the e x p e n s e of any
just o n e d r a w b a c k - they won ' t be y o u r c h i l d r e n . W h a t o the r f ea tu re o r h u m a n qua l i t y is not a s h a l l o w o r
y o u ' r e b u y i n g he re isn ' t state-of-the-art g e n e t h e r a p y d e m e a n i n g pursu i t , a n d is utterly u n a p o l o g e t i c a b o u t
o r the ab i l i t y to pred i c t w h a t y o u r kids wi l l l o o k l ike - his i d e o l o g y " B e a u t y is it 's o w n r e w a r d - this is the first
i t 's the unfer t i l i sed e g g s o r s p e r m of A m e r i c a n m o d e l s . soc ie ty to truly c o m p r e h e n d h o w i m p o r t a n t beau t i fu l
G i v e n a ga l l e r y of " b e a u t i f u l p e o p l e " , wi th p i c tu res , g e n e s a re to o u r e v o l u t i o n " ,
a g e s a n d (of course ) m e a s u r e m e n t s , y o u c a n b id t o ,
effect ively, have the i r c h i l d r e n . Still in te res ted? T h e n
visit w w w . r o n s a n g e l s . c o m . Barely Legal
I . m" A l t h o u g h the site w o u l d be i l l ega l in the U K , it 's entire-
The Science ly p e r m i s s i b l e in mos t U S states. H o w e v e r , the l a u n c h
o f the site h a s (unsurpr is ing ly ) t r i g g e r e d a n urgen t
% S o , pr ior i ty o n e , wi l l it a c tua l l y w o r k ? W i l l this s m a l l rev iew of the s t a n d a r d s a n d r e g u l a t i o n s s u r r o u n d i n g
\ f o r t une a c tua l l y g u a r a n t e e y o u a c h i l d w h o ' l l be a b l e e - c o m m e r c e in the U S , with q u e s t i o n s a l r e a d y b e i n g
„ a j j j to ca r ve out a c a r e e r in B a y w a t c h ? W h o ' l l be the a s k e d in C o n g r e s s . The l e a d i n g p o l i t i c a l s p o k e s m a n
o b j e c t o f des i r e fo r every o t h e r s ixteen yea r-o ld o n the o n the sub|ect ( and a u t h o r of the on l y F e d e r a l r egu la-
/ b l o c k ? W h o ' l l be w o r k i n g the ca twa l k be fo re they sit t ions o n the fertility industry) Ron W y d e n , a D e m o c r a -
i the i r G C S E ' s ? E r . . . n o . A c c o r d i n g to p rac t i ca l l y every t ic S e n a t o r f r o m O r e g o n , c o m m e n t e d that " th is is a
b i o l o g i s t q u e s t i o n e d o n the sub jec t , o n e g o o d - l o o k i n g t r o u b l i n g e x a m p l e of h o w b i g b u c k s a n d f lat-out c o m -
/ ", pa r en t ce r ta in l y won ' t p r o d u c e a s t r eam of beau t i fu l m e r c i a l i s m d o m i n a t e a f i e ld w h e r e the re a re so m a n y
c h i l d r e n . P ro fesso r G e o r g e A n n a s o f B o s t o n Un i ve r s i - v u l n e r a b l e p e o p l e " b e f o r e p r o m i s i n g that he ' l l be
ty put the mat te r blunt ly, "It's l u d i c r o u s - n o k id ' s " l o o k i n g into this o n e " .
/ g o i n g to l o o k l ike the m o d e l ' s p i c t u r e . . . o f t e n g e n e s M e a n w h i l e , Ron H a r r i s ' site has b e e n a t t a c k e d
| 1 wi l l sk ip a g e n e r a t i o n a n y w a y " . Bes ides , as any G C S E f r o m al l s ides - S e a n T i p t o n , s p o k e s m a n f o r the A m e r -
b i o l o g y c o u r s e wi l l tel l y o u , gene t i c s is d e p e n d a n t o n i c a n Soc ie t y f o r R e p r o d u c t i v e M e d i c i n e , s imp l y b r a n d -
b o t h paren ts a n d a hefty s l i ce of p robab i l i t y - as D r e d the c o n c e p t " u n e t h i c a l a n d d i s t a s t e f u l " , whi ls t D r
G e o r g e H a r d a c r e , f r o m the C a l i f o r n i a n Institute of C o n n o r R e e c e , c h a i r o f the c ross party c o m m i t t e e o n
G e n e t i c s , w a s swift to po in t ou t , " N a t u r e is not that m e d i c a l e th i cs , w a s truly d a m m i n g , d e e m i n g the site
s i m p l e " . to be " the worst p o s s i b l e e x a m p l e of the internet b e i n g
1 ' N o n e t h e l e s s , M r Ha r r i s sees the p r o c e s s as " D a r - used for c l ! 'he w r o n g r e a s o n s . . . w h a t s h o u l d have
w in ' s na tu ra l s e l e c t i o n at it 's very b e s t " . I n d e e d , he ' s b e e n the grea tes t sc ien t i f i c t o o l o f the cen tu ry has
d e v e l o p e d his o w n very p e r s o n a l v i ew o n e v o l u t i o n , b e c o m e a p l a y g r o u n d fo r m o n e y - g r a b b i n g low-l i fes
H «~JBU, " c h o o s i n g e g g s f r o m beau t i fu l w o m e n wi l l p r o f o u n d l y p e d d l i n g d u b i o u s p r o d u c t s a n d suspec t t h e o r i e s " .
1 e
Bidding Wars
D e s p i t e the n e g a t i v e p r e s s , R o n s a n g e l s ( n a m e d ,
a c c o r d i n g to M r H a r r i s , in t r ibute to l o w g r a d e 7 0 ' s
cult ser ies C h a r l i e ' s A n g e l s ) , has n o n e t h e l e s s d o n e
a m a z i n g bus iness , r eg i s t e r i ng 1.1 m i l l i o n hits o n it 's
first d a y a l o n e . O f these , m a n y wi l l s imp l y b e v is i t ing
f o r s h o c k v a l u e , but never the less e n o u g h po ten t i a l
pa ren ts s t u m p e d up the $ 2 4 . 9 5 m e m b e r s h i p fee
( requ i red be fo re y o u c a n b i d , c h e c k o u t the d o n o r s o r
f i nd ou t m o r e t h a n the b a r e m i n i m u m a b o u t the site)
to p u s h a s k i n g pr i ces w a y a b o v e the i r s tar t ing leve ls .
I ndeed , e v en b e f o r e the o f f i c i a l l a u n c h o f the " se r v-
i c e " , M r Ha r r i s w a s o f f e r e d $ 4 2 0 0 0 f o r the e g g s of
o n e of the m o d e l s by a w o m a n s imp l y iden t i f i ed as
Beth. S p e a k i n g in U S A Today , the 4 2 y e a r o l d T V p r o -
d u c e r e x p l a i n e d her r e a s o n i n g , " T h e w h o l e po i n t o f
this is t o f i nd a n e g g d o n o r w h o l o o k s l ike m e - that
way I m igh t n e v e r h a v e to e x p l a i n the fact that I u s e d
s o m e o n e e l se ' s e g g s " .
Man or Monster?
Ron H a r r i s , the m a n r e s p o n s i b l e fo r the site has a past
that c o u l d be d e s c r i b e d as " c h e q u e r e d " at best. A
one- t ime p o r n o g r a p h e r , d i rec to r , p h o t o g r a p h e r a n d
author , he ' s best k n o w n f o r his p r e v i ou s ven tu re into
c o m m e r c i a l b r e e d i n g - he u s e d to ra ise A r a b i a n h o r s -
es b e f o r e se l l i ng t h e m o n f o r $ 2 0 0 0 0 a p i e c e . A s a
p h o t o g r a p h e r he c l a i m s to have p r o d u c e d c o v e r ar t-
w o r k f o r V o g u e , E l le a n d C o s m o p o l i t a n , a n d has a
lengthy c a r e e r with P l a y b o y (for w h o he has a l s o
d i r e c t ed a ser ies o f "a r t i s t i c s p e c i a l s " ) .
U l t imate l y , he ' s a c l a s s i c en t r ep reneu r , h a v i n g
d a b b l e d in every f i e ld as m a rke t s c h a n g e a n d m o n e y
shifts. A p h o t o g r a p h e r in the sixties he b e c a m e a p u r -
veyo r o f p o r n in the seven t i es , b e f o r e m o v i n g in to
exerc i se p r o g r a m m e s a n d v i d e o s in the hea l th c o n -
sc ious e igh t i e s . A f i na l f l ou r i sh with the ex t reme e d g e
of e - c o m m e r c e is thus ent i re ly in cha rac te r . . .
Parental Responsibility
F r o m the m o m e n t I h e a r d a b o u t the site f o r the first
t ime , two q u e s t i o n s have f l a s h e d a r o u n d my h e a d .
Firstly, w h a t k i nd of p e o p l e w o u l d w a n t to effect ive ly
buy the i r c h i l d (or, p e r h a p s m o r e a ccu ra t e l y , the i r
c h i l d ' s parent ) in this way. But the s e c o n d , a n d pe r-
h a p s m o r e i n t e res t i ng , po i n t is w h a t k ind of p e o p l e
w o u l d w a n t to put t h e m s e l v e s o n the m a r k e t in such a
w a y ? A f t e r a l l , i t 's not l ike t ry ing to sel l a k idney o r
b o n e m a r r o w to m a k e a fast buck - w e ' r e t a l k i n g
a b o u t se l l i ng off the rights to a ch i l d that is, b i o l o g i -
ca l l y s p e a k i n g , 5 0 % yours . O f c o u r s e , h u n d r e d s of
m e n d o n a t e to s p e r m b a n k s every day, a n d e g g d o n a -
t ions a re f a r f r o m u n c o m m o n ( a l t hough the p r o c e s s
invo lves in tens ive g e n e the rapy a n d c o m p l e x surgery ) ,
but t hose a re (usually) a n o n y m o u s . A s with a d o p t i o n ,
the d o n o r c a n neve r k n o w the identity of the i r o f f sp r i ng
- o r even if the i r o f f e r i ng p r o d u c e d a c o n c e p t i o n -
a n d so p a r e n t h o o d c a n r e m a i n a n u n k n o w n , r e s p o n -
sibi l i ty-free, quanti ty . In this c a s e , however , the d o n o r
must meet (and a g r e e terms with) the buyer, a n d wi l l
f o r e ve r be a w a r e of the ex is tence of the i r c h i l d , whi ls t
the c o u p l e c o n c e r n e d wi l l l ive the k n o w l e d g e of the
identity o f the i r c h i l d ' s true p a r e n t a g e . W i l l they,
i n d e e d s h o u l d they, tell the i r ch i l d ? A n d w h a t h a p p e n s
if the c h i l d wants to get to k n o w it's b i o l o g i c a l m o t h -
er? I ndeed , in the l i t iga t ion f renzy that c o n t i n u a l l y
gr ips the U S , w h a t h a p p e n s w h e n o n e of the c h i l d r e n
d e c i d e s to sue that se l f-same m o t h e r fo r d e s e r t i o n . . .
But b a c k to the first po in t - w h a t k ind of p e o p l e
put the i r e g g s up f o r s a l e ? O n e of the m o d e l s i n v o l v e d
in the s a l e , 2 6 y e a r o l d Mis ty M c F e r n (who des c r i be s
herse l f as a s t rugg l i ng actress) put it s imply , " I 'd ra ther
d o this t h a n d o P l ayboy o r P e n t h o u s e " . A l t h o u g h
m o r a l l y d u b i o u s , it 's a di f f icu l t po in t to a r g u e , a n d , as
she says " I 've neve r e v en h a d c h i c k e n p o x , m u m p s o r
m e a s l e s . D o n ' t y o u th ink those a re pretty g o o d g e n e s
to pass a l o n g ? " M o r e o v e r , it cer ta in ly isn't the m o d e l s
w h o a re the v ic t ims - they get to se lect the winner ,
nego t i a t e con t rac t s a n d d o c t o r s , a n d wi l l k e e p a l l the
m o n e y fo r t hemse l ves (Harr is c h a r g e s a n a d d i t i o n a l
2 0 % c o m m i s s i o n o n t o p of the f ina l fee) . I n d e e d , the
site w e l c o m e s a p p l i c a t i o n s f r o m w o u l d - b e d o n o r s -
you just have to be " y o u n g , b e a u t i f u l , hea l thy a n d
in t e l l i gen t " to app ly .
The Future
In a l l probab i l i t y , the marke t c e i l i ng wil l a l r e a d y have
b e e n r e a c h e d by the t ime you read this, a n d both H a r -
ris a n d his m o d e l s wi l l have m a d e a tidy profit f o r the i r
e n d e a v o u r . But whilst they b e g i n to p r e p a r e f o r the ha r-
r o w i n g p rocess that wil l l e a d to t h e m fu l f i l ing the i r e n d
of the b a r g a i n , he wil l be p r e p a r i n g fo r next m on t h s
a u c t i o n to g o o n l ine - this t ime o f fe r ing the s p e r m of
m a l e m o d e l s (at c o n s i d e r a b l y l owe r pr ices ) . M e a n w h i l e
the U S G o v e r n m e n t wil l b e g i n to rush t h r o u g h the l e g -
is la t ion that m a k e s the ent i re c o n c e p t i l l e g a l . A l l that
r e m a i n s to be seen is whe the r o r not they c a n d o so
be fo re s o m e o n e m a t c h e s m o d e l e g g with m o d e l s p e r m
a n d creates the i r o w n DIY ca twa l k c h i l d . . .
8 n x
THE CITY & GUILDS COLLEGE UNION SECTION reengineering the
way you think
Following a last minute mix up with IC's Medical Union, CGCU are back after only a fortnight...
Atlantis - C&G Freshers Dinner
An a m a z i n g a q u a t i c experi-
ence with a s u p e r b three
c o u r s e m e a l followed by a
fantastic Carnival of dance, casi-
no, games, late bar and cinema.
At l an t i s is the res ty led C i t y &
G u i l d s C o l l e g e U n i o n A n n u a l
F reshers even t a n d is p o s s i b l y the
mos t p r e s t i g i o u s F reshe rs e ven t at
Impe r i a l C o l l e g e . T h e even t wi l l
be h o s t e d o n 1 9 t h N o v e m b e r a n d
p r o m i s e s to be b i g g e r a n d bet ter
t han e v e r b e f o r e . M u c h l ike a n y
o t h e r d i n n e r , the even t starts w i th
a r e c e p t i o n w h e r e y o u wi l l be
g i v e n the c h a n c e to m e e t y o u r
pee r s f r o m y o u r o w n a n d o t h e r
d e p a r t m e n t s . But this is n o o r d i -
nary d i n n e r . In a d d i t i o n to a la te
bar , at e x t r a o r d i n a r i l y l o w p r i c e s ,
Friday 9th November 1999, 5 / 7
this y e a r sees the i n t r o d u c t i o n of
the A f t e r D i n n e r C a r n i v a l at the
Freshers D inne r .
T h e A t l a n t i s C a r n i v a l i n c l u d e s
a c a s i n o tha t wi l l f e a t u r e m a n y
c l a s s i c g a m e s s u c h as B l a c k j a c k
a n d Rou l e t t e . E a c h gues t wi l l b e
g i v e n s o m e m o n e y to g a m b l e the
Networking Buzz
What is N e t w o r k i n g ? In the
time that C & G C o l l e g e
has been in exis tence, the
students that have g r a d u a t e d f r o m
this sect ion of Imper ia l C o l l e g e have
g o n e o n to take p rom inen t pos i t ions
in industry. W o u l d it not be a n
except iona l a d v a n t a g e to the cur-
rent gene ra t i on of C & G C o l l e g e
students if they c o u l d get to k n o w
the students that have g o n e be fore
them? A t ta in ing insight a n d contacts
in your c h o s e n e n g i n e e r i n g industry
c an only a d v a n c e you towards you r
ca ree r amb i t i ons . The Ci ty & G u i l d s
C o l l e g e A s s o c i a t i o n is the co rpo ra t e
a s soc i a t i on of C & G C o l l e g e , a n d as
such prov ides oppor tun i t i es to link
to o l d students. The h ighl ight is the
a n n u a l G r a d u a t i n g Students Ne t-
w o r k i n g Recep t i on , Tuesday 16th
N o v e m b e r . A i m e d at the oppos i t e
e n d of the C & G C o l l e g e student
s p e c t r u m to A t l an t i s : The C & G
Freshers D inner , the event is the
def in ing oppor tun i ty fo r g r a d u a t i n g
students to network with f o r m e r stu-
dents in industry a n d g a i n a n a d v a n -
tage in the job market . M o r e in for-
ma t i on is a va i l ab l e f r om A d r i a n ,
Sher f ie ld 3 0 1 .
Raiders Of The Lost Bus - Brighton
I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e gett ing o n you r
I nerves? The w e e k e n d ho l iday to a
I far away p l a ce l o o k i n g e x p e n -
sive? W e have just the answer .
Raiders O f The Lost Bus is the f a n -
tastic day excurs ion to Br ighton o n
Sunday 7th N o v e m b e r . The trip f o l -
lows r o u n d the s t r eaming route of
the Veteran C a r Run , in wh i ch o u r
moto r i s ed m a s c o t , B o , part ic ipates
with hundreds of other pre 1 9 0 4
cars . O n c e there , the Br ighton ho l i -
day resort offers a vast array of
pubs , piers a n d other enter ta in-
ments. The £5 bus ticket (there is no
c h e a p e r return ticket to Brighton)
c a n be b rough t n o w f rom Water-
stones a n d C C S S h o p .
n i gh t a w a y w i t h . Pr izes a r e a w a r d -
e d to the p e o p l e wi th the mos t
m o n e y at the e n d . But the re is
m o r e - C G C U wi l l be s h o w i n g a
m a j o r b l o c k b u s t e r f i l m f ree to a l l
gues t s . The m o v i e wi l l be run a l l
n igh t s o that gues t s won ' t miss o u t
o n a l l the o t h e r a t t r a c t i o n s o n
offer . If a l l this is not e n o u g h to
e n t e r t a i n y o u the re wi l l a l s o be
t a b l e g a m e s s u c h as p o o l a n d
t a b l e f o o t b a l l o n offer .
T h e C a r n i v a l w i l l start s o o n
a f te r the d i n n e r a n d f ea tu re a
d i s c o wi th s o m e of Impe r i a l C o l -
lege 's p r e m i e r D Js . If the re is o n e
e v e n t y o u s h o u l d a t t e n d m a k e
sure its this o n e ! T i cke ts cos t £ 1 5
f o r F reshe rs a n d £ 1 7 f o r a l l o t h e r
s t u d e n t s . T i c k e t s a r e a v a i l a b l e
n o w f r o m W a t e r s t o n e s , C C S s h o p
a n d y o u r C i t y & G u i l d s C o l l e g e
U n i o n D e p a r t m e n t a l Soc ie ty .
F o r m o r e i n f o r m a t i o n p l e a s e
c o n t a c t the C G C U in p e r s o n , v i a
t e l e p h o n e e x t e n s i o n 4 8 0 7 3 o r
t h r o u g h the i n f o r m a t i o n s u p e r -
h i g h w a y , at g u i l d s @ i c . a c . u k .
The Director's Cut By Dinesh Ganesarajah, C G C U President
Felix is f r a n c h i s i n g off a p a g e
a w e e k to the C o n s t i t u e n t
C o l l e g e U n i o n s ( C C U s ) .
H a v e y o u n o t i c e d ? T h e i d e a is a
fantas t i c o n e . To the reader , y o u
n o w have the c h a n c e to d i s c o v e r a
g l i m p s e of s o m e of the th ings we
d o . To the C C U , the s t r ange by-
p r o d u c t is that if the C C U is not
d o i n g a n y t h i n g , they a r e n o w
f o r c e d to d o s o m e t h i n g if they a re
to i n c l u d e a n y t h i n g in the i r p a g e ,
as m o n t h l y s t r eams of "he l lo - its us
a g a i n ! " d o not b o d e we l l f o r the
state o f the C C U . For tuna te l y f o r
this C C U , C i t y & G u i l d s C o l l e g e
U n i o n , we a r e n o w d o i n g so m u c h
that a for tn ight ly s e c t i on in Fel ix
w o u l d no t s t re t ch the w r i t i n g
c a p a c i t y of the act iv i t ies we a re
current ly i n v o l v e d in . U n f o r t u n a t e -
ly, we have not b e e n g r a n t e d this
p r i v i l ege .
If you have b e e n f o l l o w i n g this
sec t i on of Felix av id ly , y o u wil l
have o p e n e d this issue e x p e c t i n g
the return of the M e d i c s to "do
the i r stuff". Un fo r tuna t e l y , desp i t e
h a v i n g e x c i t i n g th ings to c o m e
f r o m the M e d i c s ' S o c i a l Reps , it
w o u l d a p p e a r s o m e sort o f mis-
c o m m u n i c a t i o n in I C S M S U , a n d
the d y n a m i c ab i l i t y o f G u i l d s m e n
to p r o d u c e qua l i t y w o r k o n a 3 a m
T h u r s d a y m o r n i n g , has m e a n t o u r
ear l y r e tu rn .
At this i n s t a n t a n e o u s po in t in
t i m e , C G C U is very events o r i e n -
t a t ed . The r e a s o n ? B e c a u s e that is
al l p e o p l e no t i c e o n a phys i ca l
l eve l . I a m not in the s l ightest bit
w o r r i e d if at this p h a s e in the y e a r
the events a r e not ent i re ly s u c c e s s -
ful - it is g o o d e n o u g h that we
have events a n d p e o p l e a re no t i c -
ing these events . O n c e C G C U is
c o n s i s t e n t l y d e m a n d i n g p u b l i c
a t t e n t i o n , f o r g o o d o r b a d , w e c a n
u n ra v e l s o m e m o r e exc i t ing p r o d -
ucts, i n c l u d i n g those that a re not
e v e n t s o r i e n t a t e d , w h i c h a r e
b o u n d to b i a s the g o o d . . .
1 n 9
The State of the Union Aldwych
There a r e 19 top Univers i t ies in the
country, c a l l ed the Russell g r o u p .
T h o s e Universit ies have 1 9 U n i o n s ,
c a l l ed the A l d w y c h g r o u p . A l d w y c h
was set up to fight fees. A s the top
Universit ies w e a re most at risk of
extra cha rges (top u p fees) b e c a u s e
p e o p l e will pay extra fo r a better
deg ree . As o n e of the Presidents
wh i ch m a k e up the g r o u p , I a m o n
the l o o k up for h i d d e n cou rse costs.
If y ou think that you are be ing
c h a r g e d extra c o m e a n d see m e o r
the D P E&W, Kevin Butcher. Thus f a r
Imper ia l has been p l ay ing very fair,
(would we expec t anyth ing di f fer-
ent?) but C a m b r i d g e have h a d a
3 5 % increase in H a l l rents, s o m e
p laces are be ing c h a r g e d fo r h a n d -
outs o r even to g o to the i r o w n g r a d -
ua t i on ! !
Up for grabs
There are still a few ' e l e c t e d ' p l aces
o p e n fo r U n i o n commi t t ees . H a v e a
l o o k o n the not ice b o a r d outs ide the
U D H . M o s t of t h e m m e a n n o work
on your part , just a c h a n c e to see the
inner work ings of I C U . S u m m e r Ba l l
cha i r is as m u c h work as you w o u l d
By Natasha Newton, Imperial College Union President - This Week's Union Meetings -
Monday 1st
• B U S A D i v i s i ona l mee t ing
Tuesday 2nd
• 1 p m - Arts & Enter ta inments
B o a r d t r e a s u r e s m e e t i n g ,
Resou r ce C e n t r e
• 6 p m - U n i o n F i n a n c e c o m m i t -
tee , R e s o u r c e C e n t r e
• 7 p m - M e d S c h o o l U n i o n
m e e t i n g
Wednesday 3rd
• 2 - 3 p m - A c c o m m o d a t i o n C o m -
mittee, C l u b s C o m m i t t e e R o o m
Thursday 4th
• 1 2 . 3 0 p m - R e c r e a t i o n a l C l u b s
C o m m i t t e e t reasurers m e e t i n g ,
Resou r ce C e n t r e
• 6 p m - I C U E x e c , R e s o u r c e
C e n t r e
• 6 p m - R C C G e n e r a l mee t i ng
• U L U M e d g r o u p
Friday 5th
• T B A - R A G m e e t i n g , e m a i l
f a r h a d . c o o p e r @ i c . a c . u k if you
are in teres ted .
want to m a k e it. Lots p repa ra t i on
has b e e n d o n e over the S u m m e r
a n d there 's a t e a m of pe rm an en t
staff to he lp y o u , what we don ' t have
is s tudent input . If y o u think you
k n o w what a S u m m e r Bal l shou ld
l ook l ike, s ign up !
Final years
The c o m m e m o r a t i o n day Bal l has
b e e n a n a n n u a l event f o r years a n d
years . Recently it has been poor ly
a t tended as p e o p l e c h o s e to say bye
bye t o thei r yea r g r o u p at the S u m -
m e r Bal l rather than o n g r a d u a t i o n
day. For the last two years the n u m -
bers have g o n e d o w n a n d d o w n a n d
n o w it looks totally unv iab le . BUT, I
d idn ' t think it was fa ir to b in it for you
o n the bas is of wha t this yea r ' s guys
have d o n e . . . . s o this is h o w it
works . There will be an I C U s u m m e r
ba l l this a c a d e m i c yea r (with tickets
as c lose to £55 as poss ib le ) . D o you
think there shou ld then be a late
O c t o b e r ba l l fo r your year ? (Aga in
a r o u n d £55.)
A n s w e r s o n a p o s t c a r d o r
pre ferab ly v i a e m a i l to the usua l
a d d r e s s : [email protected].
decisions A leading European e-commerce solutions provider
eFounded in 1998, netdecisions has grown to over 140 people, with offices in London, Cambridge and India, netdecisions works with leading traditional companies to embrace the booming internet economy. Our aim is to integrate skills in business strategy, user interface design, technical web and database development, with complex network integration. If you are interested in advancing technology in a young and dynamic environment we'd love to hear from you.
b
ASPs, HTML, Perl, C++, Java or Javascript
e
Oracle version 7-8, Microsoft SQL Server 6.5-7, Informix, SyBase and DB2
k
Unix or NT, in particular FreeBSD, Solaris and Linux
sOutstanding academic record required with a passion for business and the Internet
Please send your CV and covering letter to Christine Grady at netdecisions, Elsinore House, 77 Fulham Palace Road,
London W6 8JA [email protected]
10 Feedback Felix • 1 November 1999
Point S o m e of you m a y have no t i c ed that
I wasn ' t here last week . G i v i n g my
soc i a l c o n s c i e n c e its a n n u a l o u t i n g ,
I went up to C a m b r i d g e to de l i ve r a
fr iendly rap o n the knuck l e s a b o u t
the pr ice of C h i n e s e t ake-aways .
N a t u r a l l y , the l o c a l b o b b i e s
repressed m e brutal ly a n d l o c k e d
me in p r i s on , ev ident ly c o n c e r n e d
for Pres ident J i a n g ' s f r ag i l e menta l
state. Sl ightly p e e v e d , I re turned to
L o n d o n only to f ind that after yet
a n o t h e r cons t i tu t iona l rewrite, I C U
has m o d e l l e d itself o n the Peop l e ' s
Repub l i c .
F o l l o w i n g the b e n i g n a n d
p leasan t rule of Pres ident H e l ' a d ,
the c o m m u n i s t s have ins ta l l ed Pres-
ident Ta ' sha to run the Peop l e ' s
U n i o n . (That's not the on ly c o i n c i -
d e n c e : in 1 9 9 7 , a l a rge ly s u c c e s s -
fu l , yet tiny c o l o n y w a s c o n s u m e d by
its g i g a n t i c n e i g h b o u r a n d c h a n g e d
to a n admin i s t r a t i ve r eg ion ) . N o w it
w o u l d s e e m that M i n i s t e r fo r C u l -
ture J in Q u i n ' t r i is seek ing to s u p -
press d i ssen t ing vo i ces in the n a m e
of ' The P e o p l e ' , in o r d e r to establ ish
his o w n s u c c e s s i o n to rule.
H o w very wel l t i m e d this a l l is.
Last w e e k , the g o v e r n m e n t
a n n o u n c e d a bil l w h i c h wil l f ina l ly
g ive you the right not to r ead any
fi les that C o l l e g e keeps o n y o u ; last
w e e k , the Fo re ign O f f i c e instructed
y o u r p o l i c e f o r c e to s u p p r e s s
p e a c e f u l d e m o c r a t i c pro tes t in
o r d e r to protect t r a d e ; a n d last
w e e k , m e m b e r s of the U n i o n Exec-
utive d e c i d e d to use their in f luence
to suppress o p i n i o n s that d i f fered
f r o m thei r o w n .
Let's m a k e it c l ea r : this c o l u m n
wi l l r e m a i n a n o n y m o u s in spite of
pathet i c b l ea t i ng f r o m u n a c c o u n t -
a b l e hacks . W i t h o u t anonymi ty , it
c a n n o t be written. If p e o p l e knew I
wrote B reakpo in t , t hey ' d e i ther tell
m e n o t h i n g , o r tell m e a l o a d of
t r a sh . M a n y letters to Fel ix a re
u n s i g n e d , a n d the o p i n i o n s g i ven
a re of ten m o r e sens ib le than those
of the egot ists w h o s imply wish to
see their n a m e in print. This c o l u m n
is subject to the a p p r o v a l of the
Felix Editor, in exact ly the s a m e way
as any letter is. The Felix Ed i to r is,
by the way, D a v i d Roberts , not o u r
M in i s t e r of C u l t u r e , o r a n y o n e e lse
fo r that matter.
For those of you unsure , Break-
Point has c o m e a b o u t as a result of
d e s p e r a t i o n at the apa thy s h o w n by
you r typica l IC student. I C U has
g r e a t p o w e r s a n d i n f l u e n c e at
Imper i a l , a n d it sca res m e to think
of it b e i n g u s e d w i t h o u t o p e n
d e b a t e h o l d i n g o u r ' e l e c t e d ' o f f i -
cers to a c c o u n t . So B reakpo in t a i m s
to start that d e b a t e , in the lecture
theatres , in Sou ths ide a n d the sports
f ie lds . N o l e a d e r writer in Fleet
Street s igns their c o l u m n s ; if you
d o n ' t a g r e e with t h e m , you ei ther
put up o r shut up . The s a m e a pp l i e s
here .
W h y is it s o i m p o r t a n t to k n o w
w h o B reakPo in t is? If you d i d know,
dou b t l e s s the repl ies to my c o l u m n
w o u l d not t ack l e the subs t ance of
the d e b a t e , but mere ly be pe r sona l
insults - a n d that gets us n o w h e r e
fast.
S o until the ed i t o r g ives m e my
m a r c h i n g o r d e r s , you ' l l f ind m e
here s h a r i n g this p a g e with Kev in .
I'll k eep r a k i n g the l awn a n d revea l -
ing any h i d d e n t reasures I m a y f i nd .
For you r part , I h o p e you keep
r e a d i n g , a n d a i m to d i s cove r the
truth fo r yourse l f .
O h , a n d by the way - fo r those
of you w h o sa id my first c o l u m n
(Felix 1 1 5 2 ) was m a d e - u p n o n -
sense , I c o m m e n d y o u to r ead T im
Tra i lo r ' s q u o t e o n last weeks front
p a g e : " T h e r e ' s a l so a p l an to ra t io-
na l i se the sports g r o u n d s . Tha t s u g -
gests that they p l a n to sell Tedd ing-
t o n " . I t h a n k y o u .
ABSENTEE MASCOTRY
The ta , current ly the on ly v io l a t e C o n s t i t u e n t C o l -
lege U n i o n m a s c o t at Impe r i a l , d i d not a t tend a l l
of the Roya l C o l l e g e of S c i e n c e Freshers d i n n e r s .
Kev in , h o p i n g to f ind i n t r i gu ing stor ies of a n
i n g e n i o u s theft, c o v e r e d up by the R C S U has
been inves t iga t ing . The best excuse the twenty
t h o u s a n d p o u n d s wor th of t h e r m o m e t e r c o u l d
c o m e up wi th , w a s that it w a s a w a y f r o m c o l l e g e
gett ing p o l i s h e d . Kev in sees this as a b o u t as
pathet i c as : " So r r y .. I can ' t c o m e , I'm d o i n g my
hai r . "
HARD TO COMMENT
The S e n i o r C o m m o n R o o m (SCR) , a n d sur-
r o u n d i n g a r e a s o n the first f l o o r of Sher f i e ld a re
to be r e fu rb i shed . Estates has exp ressed c o n c e r n
at the lack of c o m m e n t s o n the p l ans that they
have rece i ved f r o m staff a n d students . Kev in
thinks he m a y have a n e x p l a n a t i o n , o the r t han
typ ica l IC apathy . At the t ime of wr i t ing Kev in
not ices that e-mai ls to s c r c o m m e n t s @ i c . a c . u k ,
the a dd r e s s to w h i c h c o m m e n t s were inv i t ed , a re
b o u n c i n g .
A recent ar t ic le in staff newslet ter ICD i s to r te r
a l so stated that de ta i l s c o u l d be v i e w e d f r o m
www.ad.ic.ac.uk/estates, yet the p a g e is still
awa i t i ng the a p p r o p r i a t e l ink.
JACK HAMMER ATTACK
Estates have stated that they a re keen to keep
no i se a n d d i s rup t i on to a m i n i m u m d u r i n g the
S C R pro jec t , w h i c h wil l run f r o m direct ly after
C h r i s t m a s , to the e n d of J une . T h o s e r e spons ib l e
a re ev ident ly a w a r e of fears of a repea t of the
d e b a c l e that a c c o m p a n i e d the Library ex tens ion
Mish Mash
A Mostly Harmless Column by Kevin, a random entity who
knows nothing about nothing w h i c h resul ted in students t a k i n g e x a m s in a tent
ou t s ide Sou ths i de a n d have stated that " s tudents
s h o u l d not f ea r no i se d u r i n g e x a m s " .
To ensure they have e v i d e n c e to b a c k up
their s ta tements con t r ac to r s with jack h a m m e r s
have b e e n dr i l l i ng into wa l l s a r o u n d Sher f i e ld to
see the effect o n the G r e a t H a l l . Kev in was not
e n c o u r a g e d by the fact lectures in the Reed a n d
P i p p a r d Lecture Theat res were d i s rup ted by n o i s -
es s im i l a r to jack h a m m e r s d u r i n g the w e e k of
the tests.
PRICE WAR HERE WE COME
The I C U run n e w s a g e n t s o n the w a l k w a y wil l
r e loca te to the J C R t e m p o r a r i l y f r o m J anua r y
d u r i n g the S C R w o r k s . S tudents a n d Staff wi l l be
f a c e d with a c h o i c e be tween Q T ' s , a n d the I C U
out le t , w h i c h wil l be s i tua ted o p p o s i t e e a c h
other. Kev in e n c o u r a g e s students to c h o o s e I C U ,
as profits benef i t s tudents , r a the r t han b e i n g
s w a l l o w e d by She r f i e ld . T h e U n i o n newsagen t s is
of c o u r s e s u p e r i o r to Q T : it wi l l r e m a i n the on ly
o n e with n e w s p a p e r s a n d m a g a z i n e s , a n d is a l so
c h e a p e r o n s t a n d a r d l ines s u c h as dr inks a n d
cr i sps . " ' . i i S M W S l < i
THE MILLENNIUM HAMSTER
The h u g e M i l l e n n i u m W h e e l o n the b a n k of the
T h a m e s is n o w v is ib le f r o m parts of c o l l e g e .
Kev in was d i s a p p o i n t e d to learn that Imper ia l
B io log is ts a re not i n v o l v e d in the c r ea t i on of the
h u g e M i l l e n n i u m H a m s t e r that wi l l be ev ident ly
be r equ i r ed to p o w e r it.
To comment or contribute: http://come.to/mishmash
7 1 !M
^www«mckinseyxom^-
^www«mckinseyxo,uk)-
^Lngrad_rec@mckinseyxomJ-
2 k x
Felix
Editor. David Rooer*s
Deputy .Mane Nicholnou � (Reviews) ... Joel Lewis
Assi (Layout)
News Andrew Ofori
l-'hi . togropy.
: , .
V-
' • •
Books Russeli Cummei
V,
Nicholaoj, Andy Ofori. Dinesh
I
Lewis, Gus Paul, Dave Edwcrds,
;
Feedback
Felix, The Portacabins, Prince
Consort RcL London' SW7 2BB
URL : w w w . s u . i c . a c u k / F e l i x .
E-mai l : fe l ix (a ) ic .ac .uk
Felix s p r o d u c e d fo r a n d o n
beha l f o f Imper i a l C o l l e g e
U n i o n M e d i a G r o u p a n d i s :
pr in ted a t M C P Li tho L im i ted ,
Uni ts B2 & B 3 , H a t t o n S q u a r e ,
1 6 - 1 6 a B a l d w i n s G a r d e n s ,
L o n d o n f . C I N 7RJ
Felix
A RETURN F R O M THE GRAVE
D e a r D a v e ,
H a v i n g b e c o m e a little f i dge ty
in my s e l f - i m p o s e d r e t i r emen t , I
felt it w a s t i m e to o f fe r my two
' p e n n e t h to the Imper i a l t h r o n g .
Fel ix this y e a r s e e m s to h a v e star t-
e d w e l l a n d w i l l , I a m c o n f i d e n t ,
g o f r o m s t rength to s t rength o v e r
the year . It d o e s s e e m , howeve r ,
that this y e a r ' s c o l u m n s a r e g e n e r -
a t i n g a f e w p r o b l e m s . O f c o u r s e ,
t h a t ' s the re r o l e , but the re a r e
p r o b l e m s a n d the re a r e p r o b l e m s .
Firstly, I mus t fu l ly a g r e e wi th
J o h n Q u a n t r e l l ' s p o i n t a b o u t
a n o n y m i t y , l e a d i n g , I s u s p e c t , to
s o m e c o n f u s i o n , in y o u r e d i t o r i a l .
A s a c o l u m n i s t f o r the p r e v i o u s
f o u r y e a r s , I w o u l d n e v e r d i s a g r e e
w i th the p r o t e c t i o n of s o u r c e s .
H a d I not p r o t e c t e d m i n e , the
V o i c e of R e a s o n w o u l d neve r have
l a s t ed as it d i d . D e s p i t e w i t c h -
h u n t s o f w h i c h J o e M c C a r t h y
w o u l d have b e e n p r o u d , they still
d o n ' t k n o w w h o h e / s h e / i t / t h e y
i s / a r e , s o it 's not a p r o b l e m if
y o u ' r e c a r e f u l . H o w e v e r , that is a
t o t a l l y d i f f e r e n t i s sue t o the
a n o n y m i t y o f a u t h o r s . Y o u a r e , I
fea r , qu i t e w r o n g to s u g g e s t that ' i t
w o u l d i r r e v o c a b l y d a m a g e the
ab i l i t y o f the wr i ters to c o l l e c t
i n f o r m a t i o n if t he i r ident i ty w a s
k n o w n . ' O n the con t ra r y , my e x p e -
r i e n c e s s u g g e s t that it is i m p o s s i -
b le to d o a g o o d j o b in the c o l -
u m n g a m e w i t h o u t o n e ' s ident i ty
b e i n g w i d e l y k n o w n . O v e r the f o u r
yea r s I w a s in the cha i r , I must
h a v e b e e n a p p r o a c h e d by h u n -
d r e d s of p e o p l e , o f f e r i n g i n f o r m a -
t i o n , s u g g e s t i o n s f o r a r t i c l es e tc .
W i t h o u t a n a m e a n d that d e l i g h t -
ful p h o t o , I w o u l d h a v e b e e n
s tu f f ed . T h e r e a r e o n l y t w o s c e n a r -
ios in w h i c h a u t h o r a n o n y m i t y
w o u l d be jus t i f i ed : if the a u t h o r ' s
life o r p l a c e at C o l l e g e w e r e in
j e o p a r d y , in w h i c h c a s e wr i te it
e l s e w h e r e in Fe l ix , o r if the c o l u m n
w e r e s o e x e c r a b l y aw fu l tha t the
a u t h o r d i d not h a v e the guts t o put
his o r h e r n a m e to it. The f o r m e r
ce r t a i n l y hasn ' t a p p l i e d at IC , a n d
it is p r o b a b l y bet te r if I reserve
j u d g e m e n t o n the la t ter p o i n t ,
b e y o n d s a y i n g that I a l w a y s , w i t h -
ou t e x c e p t i o n , u s e d my c o l u m n to
s a v a g e the c r e d i b i l i t y o f a n y
a n o n y m o u s a r t i c l e o r le t ter in
Fe l ix .
S e c o n d l y , I f ee l it necessa r y , at
the risk of s o u n d i n g p a t r o n i s i n g
(mo i ? ) , to o f f e r a little a d v i c e to
the c o l u m n i s t s , B r e a k p o i n t in p a r -
t i cu la r . Y o u s h o u l d h a v e l ea rn t by
n o w that y o u d o N O T , u n d e r a n y
c i r c u m s t a n c e s , a t t a ck I C U o n s p e -
c i f ic , i ssues un l ess y o u r f ac t s a re so
i r r e f u t a b l y w a t e r t i g h t tha t Perry
M a s o n , R u m p o l e a n d K a v a n a g h
t o g e t h e r w o u l d g i ve up a n d g o
h o m e ra the r t h a n c h a l l e n g e y o u .
A n y less t h a n this p o s i t i o n m a k e s
f o r a very t e d i o u s letters p a g e . A
b r o a d b r u s h , bu t f a c t u a l ,
a p p r o a c h wi l l be m u c h m o r e s u c -
c e s s f u l , c o n c e n t r a t i n g o n the
g ross l y ine f f i c i en t b u r e a u c r a c y that
c h o k e s I C U d r i v e n by the m i s g u i d -
e d a i m of ' b e i n g i n c l u s i v e ' , w h i c h
m e a n s a l l o w i n g e v e r y o n e to sit o n
o n e of a t h o u s a n d po in t l e s s c o m -
mit tees that on l y surv ive b e c u a s e
of the u n p a i d status of mos t of
t h e i r m e m b e r s . Less c h a r i t a b l e
sou l s t h a n myse l f h a v e s u g g e s t e d
tha t o u r n e w P r e s i d e n t is no t
exac t l y a Sir J o h n H a r v e y - J o n e s
o n the o r g a n i s a t i o n a l m a n a g e -
m e n t f ron t , s o the last t h i n g she
n e e d s is to h a v e wr i te letters t o
Fe l ix every w e e k .
I w o u l d po i n t ou t that t he r e ' s a
s m a l l d e p a r t m e n t o n c a m p u s that
s e e m s to g e n e r a t e p lenty of m a t e -
ria l f o r c o l u m n i s t s a n d p r o b l e m s
f o r the rest o f IC. Y o u m a y h a v e
h e a r d of it, B r e a k p o i n t ? It's n e a r
the Q u e e n ' s Towe r a n d it 's c a l l e d
the She r f i e l d B u i l d i n g . Its m a c h i -
n a t i o n s a l w a y s use to the b a n e of
a l l o f o u r l i v e s , a n d I d o u b t
t h e y ' v e c h a n g e d m u c h . They mus t
be t h i n k i n g it 's C h r i s t m a s c o m e
ear ly , s o why not , in the m o d i f i e d
w o r d s of H a r r y T r u m a n , c o m e
i n s i de the tent a n d start p i s s i ng
o u t , r a the r t h a n the o t h e r w a y
r o u n d , as y o u have d o n e r e l en t-
lessly to d a t e .
A l l t he best ,
S i m o n B a k e r
A N O N Y M I T Y :
THE DEBATE C O N T I N U E S
D e a r Felix (and Kevin),
O k , so what exactly is the p r o b -
lem p e o p l e have with Kev in . I've
read his c o l u m n s ince it started last
te rm, a n d yes, I have to admi t , it p ro-
v o k e d e m o t i o n . G o o d o n h im say I,
as to p rovoke any sort o f response in
this apathet i c university must m e a n
he is d o i n g some th ing right! ! !
Peop le c o m p l a i n that he slags
off their cou r se , but f r om what I
r e m e m b e r ( cons ider ing I'm a n idiot,
without any b a c k issues of Felix) he
has c o m m e n t e d a b o u t many differ-
ent d isc ip l ines . A l s o , if peop l e are
really stressed with wha t he has writ-
ten , why don ' t they write directly to
h im? O r are they be ing t o o stupid
that they don ' t actua l ly r ead his E-
mai l address at the bot tom of the
p a g e . N o w cal l m e foo l i sh , but is
this there so that p e o p l e c a n contact
h im?
As to f ind ing out w h o m Kev in is,
I think will be rather diff icult, as p i n -
ning h im d o w n to on e p l a ce must be
h a r d ! I say this, b e c a u s e last term he
a t tended s o m e physics lectures (as I
r emember ) , a n d this term he is sitting
in med i c a l lectures - h m m m . This
c o u l d therefore l ead to the c o n c l u -
s ion that Kevin is actua l ly the Rector.
But w o u l d I really l ike to join the rest
of the g a n g a n d jump to c o n c l u -
s ions, rather than take the c o l u m n at
face va lue , the way I think that its
i n t ended !
T E F F H
(A s e c o n d yea r entity)
D e a r D a v e ,
W e med i cs tend to get a b a d
press a n d I think that we are not
g iven e n o u g h credit . W e r e it not for
us, Felix w o u l d have a lot of empty
space a n d a dw i n d l i n g numbers of
readers . After a l l , we tend to feature
prominent ly in every issue a n d it is a
lot eas ie r to g r a b p e o p l e ' s interest by
laying into the med i c s (as we tend to
a rou se a lot of passion) than it is to
under take decen t , investigative jour-
The deadline for letters intended for publication is Wednesday 12 noon - drop into the porta-
cabins or email [email protected]. Letters may be edited for length but not grammar or spelling.
1 k 3
O h dear , the Ed i to r is h igh l y t
at the m o m e n t , f i n i s h i n g
i , . .v lnch l eaves me to v.
this h igh l y a n o n y m o u s guest <
t o r i a l .
V H A T ' S A N ED ITOP IA I I
N o r m a l l y a n ed i t o r i a l is a cht i
to ref lect u p o n t f iose issues rai
w i th in the p a g e s of the p u b l i
t i o n a n d use ih is pos i t i on of p
s e c t i o n s 1 hat the true b a r g a i n s
a r e t o be f o u n d . Y o u c a n usua l l y
pii k up d e c e n t ( f j ' s fot a b o u t € 3
d u e to the b l a n k e t p r i c i n g po l i cy .
H o w e v e t it va r i es f r o m o n e s h o p
to a n o t h e r a n d I h a ve p e r s o n a l l y
p i c k e d u p " T h e C u l t of An t a n d
[)( c " for on l y ' ., as!
V i d e o s a r e s i m i l a r l y p r i c e d and; :
this is a g o o d p l a c e to p i c k up a l l
na l i sm in a n attempt to write well-
b a l a n c e d informat ive p ieces .
You refuse to n a m e the writer of
BreakPoint because " n o self-respect-
ing Edi tor . . .would de l iberate ly reveal
the identity of a n a n o n y m o u s
source . . .as it w o u l d i r revocably d a m -
a g e the abil ity of the writers to co l l ec t
i n f o r m a t i o n if the i r ident i ty w a s
k n o w n " . O h , c o m e o n . Its hardly
M I 5 . I'm sure you r ' b l o w i n g their
cove r ' will not result in t hem be ing
cap tured a n d tortured with pliers
until they reveal g o v e r n m e n t secrets.
I assure you that w e won ' t send the
heavies to d o them over. W e w o u l d
just like to see wh i ch pathet ic little
creature it is that g o e s r ound p e d -
dl ing half-truths a n d p r o p a g a n d a .
I s e e m to recal l that M i s h - M a s h
was o n c e a c c o m p a n i e d by s o m e
weird l ook ing kid with g lasses . W h o
is he? I a s s u m e he is not a m e d i c so
why is he at C h a r i n g C r o s s for l ec-
tures? N o n e of us bother g o i n g . I
f ind his c o n d e s c e n d i n g tone to be
highly irritating a n d his use o f wo rds
such as ' rowdy w a n n a b e doc to r s '
annoy ing . The vast majority of us
ARE g o i n g to be doc tors . I t ake it that
he has s o m e future p lans t o o , in
wh ich case he must be a snide
w a n n a b e someth ing-or -other.
I a m g l ad that T im Tra i lor is stick-
ing to his w o r d in trying to keep
B U S A hybr id entry a n d to prevent the
sale of Tedd ing ton .Hybr id entry (or
dua l entry if it c o m e s to that) is
essential as otherwise w e wil l e n d
with a few elite t eams p lay ing o n a
W e d n e s d a y whilst those w h o d o not
m a k e the cut kick their heels . C a n I
remind B U S A a b o u t " spor t for a l l " ?
G i v e n that the p roceeds of the
'secret ' sa le of Tedd ing ton will be
insufficient to he lp f und the Sports
Cen t r e , c a n I p r o p o s e a n al ternat ive.
In 5 years the grave l extract ion at
Ha r l i ng ton will be c o m p l e t e , f ree ing
up g o d knows h o w m an y lucrative
acres in a perfect d e v e l o p m e n t spot
for Hea th row Termina l Five. This wil l
sell f o r many, m an y t imes what we
w o u l d get for Tedd ing ton . There is
r o o m e n o u g h for a l l IC a n d I C S M
sports t eams at C o b h a m as G K T are
leav ing . There fore , we shou ld use
reserves for the m o m e n t then sell
Ha r l i ng ton , keep Tedd ing ton , get a
new Sports Cen t r e a n d al l m o v e to
C o b h a m .
Everyone 's a winner.
K a s h Akhtar ,
4th yea r M e d i c i n e
WATERSTONES. A H E M .
D e a r D a v e ,
Th is w e e k , I f o u n d myself in
n e e d of a t ex tbook . Desp i te there
b e i n g a " c o n v e n i e n t " b r a n c h of
Wa t e r s tones l o c a t e d o n c a m p u s , I
f ind buy ing t ex tbooks a f rustrat ing
a n d t i r e s o m e e x p e r i e n c e . W h y ?
B e c a u s e m o r e o f t en t h a n n o t ,
Wa t e r s tones d o not s tock the b o o k s
I r equ i r e - there is n o t h i n g p e c u l i a r
a b o u t these b o o k s ; i n d e e d they a re
t o p o n my d e p a r t m e n t ' s list of p re-
s c r i b e d texts a n d have b e e n f o r
m a n y years . M o r e o v e r , o r d e r i n g a
b o o k f r o m Wa te r s tones on l y a d d s
t o the f rus t ra t ion , a n d on two o c c a -
s ions prev ious ly , it t o o k over a
m o n t h fo r t h e m to o b t a i n a s ing le
c o p y o f a we l l -known a n d p o p u l a r
t ex tbook .
The o l d I C U b o o k - s h o p ' g u a r -
a n t e e d� to stock
���� ��� t ex tbook
p r e s c r i b e d by a l l a c a d e m i c d e p a r t -
ments at Imper i a l , a n d w h a t d o
Wa te r s tones of fer? A m i sh-mash of
" t r e n d y " nove l s a n d " T h e Joint-
Ro l l i ng H a n d b o o k " - a pa the t i c
a n d pa t ron i s i ng a t tempt to w o o
s tudents , a n d h igh ly i n a p p r o p r i a t e ,
g i v e n c o l l e g e ' s ze ro- to l e r ance p o l -
icy t owa rds d r u g s .
Wh i l s t there is m u c h s c o p e fo r
p r i v a t e e n t e r p r i s e o n c a m p u s ,
m a n y t h o u g h t it c rass to s c r a p the
I C U B o o k - s h o p , wh i ch h a d b e e n
p r o v i d i n g a r e l i ab l e a n d ef f ic ient
serv ice to students fo r years . Two
years after o p e n i n g , Wa te r s tones
have still no t l e a r n e d f r o m thei r
m is takes , a n d con t i nue to p r o v i d e
a second-ra te serv ice .
G e o f f H e w i c k ( C o m p u t i n g 4)
A N D FINALLY...
D e a r Sir,
I a m d i s tu rbed to not i ce that ,
as yet, you d o not s e e m to have
p u b l i s h e d a s i ng l e ar t ic le p r o m o t -
ing the l e g a l i s a t i o n of c a n n a b i s .
B a s e d o n the con ten t of p rev ious
years I h a d c o m e to be l i eve that
l e g a l i s a t i o n w a s a key Fel ix pol icy .
H a v e I b e e n m i s i n f o r m e d ?
Yours ,
A n o n
I c o u l d talk a b o u t a var ie ty of
t h ings : m e d i c s , spo r t s , a n o n y m i t y ,
C o l l i q i • '< tt r s tones , d m '
just f r o m the letters p a g e . H o w e v -
e r I a m i n s t ead g o i n g to u s e th is
a u g u s t p l a t f o r m fo r the o the r e d i -
t o r i a l r ight . Tha t of w i b b l i n g o n
a b o u t t h o s e th ings c l o s e t o my
o w n hear t , c h e e s e , C a s h C o n -
verters a n d h o r r o r f i lms .
C H E E S E
W a t c h i n g the news o n the TV last
n i gh t a " t y p i c a l " Br i t ish s h o p p e r
w a s a s k e d w h e t h e r they w o u l d
b o y c o t t F r e n c h f o o d in r e s p o n s e
t o the i r b a n n i n g o f Br i t i sh beef .
T h e y r e p l i e d that they w o u l d - but
h o w c o u l d they. I m e a n i m a g i n e a
w o r l d w i t h o u t b r i e , c a m e m b e r t ,
r o q u e f o r t o r the m u l t i t u d e o f
o t h e r c h e e s e s ( i gno re that r ank
g o a t ' s c h e e s e t h o u g h ) that w e
g l ee fu l l y i m p o r t f r o m o u r F r e n c h
b r e t h r e n . C a n y o u truly i m a g i n e
a n a l t e rna t i ve to a b r i e & t o m a t o
b a g u e t t e at c e r t a i n t i m e s ? N o w ,
to a c e r t a i n extent the soft c h e e s e
g a p c a n be f i l l ed by I ta l ian c l a s -
s ics s u c h as d o l c e l a t t e , c a m b a z o -
l a a n d g o r g o n z o l a b u t b l u e
c h e e s e is not to e v e r y o n e ' s l i k i n g .
I p e r s o n a l l y w i l l no t n o w b e s h o p -
p i n g at B u d g e n s o r S o m e r f i e l d s ,
so w e ' l l see h o w they l ike tha t !
B A R G A I N S
e x p e r i e n c e d t h e a w e s o m e
de l i gh t s of this c h a i n of s h o p s .
T h e s e s tores a r e h e a v e n f o r t h o s e
l o o k i n g f o r e l e c t r o n i c a l b a r g a i n s .
T h e p r i c e s f o r T V ' s , v i d e o s , Hi-F i
e q u i p m e n t a n d c o m p u t e r s a r e a l l
O K b u t it is in t h e v i d e o a n d C D
W i t h the r e- r e l ea se o f T h e E x o r -
cist a n d the h y p e s u r r o u n d i n g the
B l a i r W i t c h P r o j e c t ( cu r r en t l y
a v a i l a b l e o n D V D o r p i r a t e
C D / v i d e o n e a r you ) h o r r o r is
o n c e a g a i n at the c i n e m a . N o w , I
c a n w h o l e h e a r t e d l y r e c o m m e n d
J o h n C a r p e n t e r ' s V a m p i r e s
( d e s p i t e the l u k e w a r m r e v i e w
s a w t x o r c i s t o r l e x a s
a w M a s s a c r e ( o n e of the
i s t u rb i ng - b u t no t s c a r y -
of a l l t ime ) . W h a t y o u
be w a t c h i n g V a m p i r e s f o r
f an t a s t i c " m a n cut in t w o
c e " a n d J a m e s W o o d ' s
b l e " t r u c k / s t a k e g u n " . Th i s
T H E E N D
A h h , stil l s p a c e to w r
f i n i s h e d o n m y threi
c h o i c e . It h a s t a k e n
t h a n it s h o u l d d o tc
( an d it 's not very g<
c o n g r a t u l a t i o n s g o tc
; I'll f i n i sh of f by s a y i n g that
are p r o b a b l y m o r e i m p o r -
ings to w o r r y a b o u t in this
t h a n spor t s g r o u n d s o r the
All complaints should be addressed to the Editor. If no satisfactory
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yr
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y
s l
e
s
n r
s
g
d A i
s
t
t n
C
g
c x
frequency N / \
Right, first o f a l l s t op r e a d -
ing this c o l u m n a n d sort
yourse l f out a n entry in the
D e a t h in V e g a s c o m p e t i t i o n
d e t a i l e d in the c o l u m n
o p p o s i t e . A n d d o it now.
Yes, now. N O W .
O k a y , y o u ' v e d o n e it, so
n o w let 's cha t a b o u t tunes .
Start ing this w e e k ' s m u s i c is
a d u o of w o n d e r f u l d i v a s ,
G a b r i e l l e a n d M a c y G r a y .
T h e n after s o m e C h a r l a t a n s
a c t i o n , we have a c h a t to
T im f r o m D e a t h in V e g a s
a n d there ' s that c o m p e t i t i o n
(you have en te red haven ' t
you? )
... frequency...
... music for you...
After the adver ts w e ' r e b a c k
with a sp l a sh of s i n g l e s , a
qu i ck EP a n d then the re ' s the
first ins ta l lment of J azz in f re-
q u e n c y - a n d a b o u t t ime t o o
(b l ame m e fo r this). Anyway ,
f o l l o w i n g this c o l u m n we ' l l
h o p e f u l l y be s o r t i n g o u t
s o m e o t h e r s p e c i a l i s e d
m u s i c c o l u m n s f o r y o u r
r e a d i n g p l e a su r e in the not
too d is tant fu ture . By the
way, d o e s a n y o n e w a n t to
write a b o u t i nd ie me ta l o r
m a y b e even fo lk m u s i c ?
As wel l as o u r b i g D e a t h in
V e g a s b l a g , the o the r g rea t
event in this w e e k ' s f r e q u e n -
cy is a p o e m in o u r c l u b b i n g
sec t i on . A scep t i c d o u b t e d its
o r i g i n , but hey I'm a be l i e ve r
so never m i n d any of that
a n d r e ad o n . . .
Macy Gray
On How Life Is
(Epic)
This is the debut a l b u m f rom 29-year-old soul s inger M a c y Gray , currently
Amer i ca ' s "hottest sensat ion" , who's beg inn ing to replicate the attention over
here a n d th roughout Europe . H e r unusua l vo ice has mostly been c o m p a r e d
to Billie Ho l iday , but that impl ies it to be rather o ld-fash ioned. In truth, there
is a l so the sound of s o m e o n e like T ina Turner in her '60's heyday. G r a y refus-
es to be p i g e o n h o l e d but if push ing stupid birds into smal l open ings is your
thing then her mus ic w o u l d best be descr ibed as raw soul with large chunks
of h ip-hop , rock, r 'h b a n d funk thrown in. In short, an eclectic concoc t i on
of beats a n d me lod ies .
Born with a vo ice that suggested she was the offspring of Tricky a n d M a r g e
S i m p s o n , she rarely spoke for fear of be ing teased . It was only after mov ing
to Los Ange l e s to join a f i lm schoo l that she b e g a n songwrit ing with fr iends.
W h e n singers for her songs didn't a p p e a r she was reluctantly roped in . .
Mus i c i ans hear ing the tape were taken by her un ique s inging vo ice : equa l
parts scat, rap a n d sweet sou l . She was s n a p p e d up by Epic early last year
a n d was given the un ique opportunity of g o i n g on nat ionwide tours before
the release of any record ings .
We l l , that's a nice fairy tale story fo l low ing the usual rags-to-riches m o u l d ,
but is her a l b u m m u c h c o p ? First track W h y Didn't You C a l l M e sets the scene
nicely - a p l ead ing soul/rock voca l with lush ha rmon ies in the back ing voca ls
(provided by G r a y herself) over funky h ip-hop beats. Whi lst the lyrics hint at
despera t ion , there's a genera l g o o d vibe running through this song . She turns
as funky as J ames Brown o n the huge Sex-O-Mat i c Venus Freak, spitting out
her lustful words like a disgrunt led Shirley Bassey. G i v e n that she c la ims al l
her lyrics are based o n persona l exper iences , the track I've C o m m i t t e d M u r -
der - abou t ki l l ing her boyfriend's boss as revenge for firing h im - is more
than a bit worry ing. Undoubted l y the a lbum's highl ight, however, is her
break through single I Try. Its steady c l imb into the U K Top Ten proves the
song's lasting a p p e a l . Its style is rather different to other tracks on O n H o w
Life Is, perhaps because it is on e of the few songs where G r a y wrote the
mus i c as well as the lyrics. Performed in the m a n n e r of a 7 0 ' s starlet, I Try
swells a n d scrambles its way to a r ip-roaring chorus , G r a y battl ing between
her two voca l tracks as if the g o o d and evil in her mind are both trying to
m a k e themselves hea rd .
If the a l b u m had a b a d point it w o u l d be that, while e a c h track c o m b i n e s a
variety of styles there is not e n o u g h difference between the actua l songs . But
as a debut a l b u m , it is more than sufficient a n d hints at a bright future.
Ryetar
Gabrielle
Rise
(WEA)
This is Gabr ie l l e ' s third a l b u m a n d def i-
nitely her best. Whi lst the first a l b u m c o n -
ta ined such 'gems' as D r e a m s a n d the sec-
o n d con ta ined noth ing m e m o r a b l e at a l l ,
it c o u l d never be said that her vo i ce was
anything less than excellent. The third
a l b u m finally sees her mature into the style
that suits her vo i ce best. That style is a
voice-driven crossover between soul and
p o p a n d works well for most of the tracks
on this record . A l o n g with these three
a l b u m s G a b r i e l l e seems to have under-
g o n e three i m a g e changes to suit the
c h a n g e in style of e a c h . She has m o v e d
f rom the eyepatched record c o m p a n y driv-
en ha rd w o m a n n e e d i n g g i m m i c k s ,
through relative 'normality' (= uninspiring)
to where she is now. That p lace is the very
b ig ha i red soul q u e e n look that looks as if
it's m o d e l l e d o n D i a n a Ross
O n e of the ma in p rob l em s with this a l b u m
is that there is noth ing to pick out lyrically
between the tracks - the two variat ions
seem to be 'we're in love, it's perfect' a n d
'we were in love but n o w we're not a n d it's
your fault 1. Wh i l e these may have their
p l ace in the song-writ ing wor ld they c a n
be , a n d many t imes have b e e n , much
more inspir ing than the lyrics f ound here.
However , Gabr ie l l e ' s vo i ce m a n a g e s to
d r a g them f rom awfulness a n d prope l
them towards a height where you can just
a b o u t let their crossness sl ide.
Wh i l e there is noth ing really outstanding
o n this a l b u m the overa l l quality is g o o d .
Unfortunately when c o m p a r e d to other
records such as that f rom M a c y G r a y it just
can't ho ld its a p p e a l a n d is easily ec l ipsed .
Tim
1 c
frequency N / \
The Charlatans
Us and Us Only
(Universal)
Us and Us Only is the fo l low up
to the excel lent Telliri Stories
a l b u m . The Cha r l a t ans are sur-
prisingly the only real survivors of
the M a n c h e s t e r scene (which
inc luded the Stone Roses a n d
the H a p p y M o n d a y s ) , s o m e -
thing that is reflected in the c o n -
f idence of the a lbum's title.
Wh i l e a n u m b e r of the songs ,
like A H o u s e Is Not A Home
quite strongly recal l their ear l ier
mater ia l (in this case the country
rock of North Country Boy), this
is not necessari ly such a b a d
thing. Indeed, there are a l so
more b o l d , exper imenta l tracks
not least the mightily impress ive
s ingle, Forever. Bu i ld ing slowly
f rom a bass-led intro into a great
universal love s o n g , it is o n e of
the best songs they have r e c o r d -
ed . It brings to m i n d the Stones
a n d Pr ima l S c r e a m , yet still
mainta ins their fairly un ique
sound of guitars b l end ing s e a m -
lessly with H a m m o n d g rooves .
O n e g rumb le is pe rhaps that the
majority of the songs are a little
too d o w n t e m p o . There a l so
aren't really any obv ious s ingles
in the vein of say O n e To Anoth-
er. Yet, whi le many of their m o r e
i l lustr ious peers have e i ther
f aded o r are s tumbl ing (e.g. the
Roses a n d Oas i s ) , the C h a r l a -
tans cont inue to consistently p ro-
duce g o o d a lbums .
Max
Death in Vegas
Interview-A Chat With Tim
Dea th in Vegas's recent a l b u m , The C o n t i n o Sessions, was a del ic ious
mixed b a g of surprises. Their assoc ia t ion with the Heavenly label and c lub
nights w o u l d p robab l y l ead on e to expect a nice poppy a l b u m full of
dancey tracks and a real feel g o o d factor. O n listening t h ou g h , The C o n -
tino Sessions is far f rom a p o p record , T im f rom the band exp la ined when
Felix writer Boycey had a quick chat with him last week . . .
Boycey: So what's al l this Heveanly Soc i a l , big beat stuff about ? It seems
to m e that you boys have more than just a few musica l sounds inf luencing
your beats. Please exp la in .
Tim: The Heaven ly Soc ia l was never abou t big beat music . The music p o l -
icy was to play g o o d music of any genre as long as it was g o o d . There
was house , rap , sou l , ind ie , absolutely anything. Those c lub nights were
bril l iant. S o m e of the DJs at the Big Beat Bout ique c lub in Brighton had a
s imi lar pol icy so I suppose that was where the assoc ia t ion started. Big beat
mus i c is mus ic by numbers t h ou g h . Pretty much in one ear and out the
other. A n y o n e cou ld m a k e a n okay b ig beat track with a few hours on a
g o o d computer . Wi th Death in Vegas , myself and Richard try to d o quite
a bit more . W e trying to m a k e mus ic that pushes back barriers. I'm thirty
eight a n d Richard is late twenties so we've been a r o u n d for a whi le
Boycey: Thirty-eight? That's quite o ld for a p o p star.
Tim: I've d o n e a lot of different things in my t ime, a n d my exper iences have
c h a n g e d m e a lot. I used to want to be a fish farmer, and then s o m e work
exper ience showed m e that fish farmers were all Ba rbour wear ing uppe r
class tossers. I've a lso lived a few years of h edon i s m and b e d l a m . I used
to m a k e regular trips to A m s t e r d a m , and a l though I've c a l m e d d o w n a lot,
I still think the p lace is great. I love little picturesque Eu ropean cities.
Boycey: So will on e ot these cities be your cho i ce for your m a d mi l len ium
party, o r will you be DJ ing a r o u n d the wor ld?
Tim: There's this little is land just off the west coast of Scot land ca l led Beaut,
a n d I think I'll be there with a few c lose fr iends. I can't be arsed with m a k -
ing a b ig dea l of it so I'm opt ing out. I suppose it's my a g e a g a i n . I'm not
bor ing really! It's a l so just after the tour we ' re d o i n g so it will be g o o d to
be ab l e to relax
Boycey : A n d finally before we run out of space , it's Felix cheesy quest ion
t ime W e all k n o w that there ain't no party like a n S-C lub Party, so w h o
w o u l d it be Rache l , H a n n a h , Jo o r the other o n e ?
Tim: Sorry mate , I haven't got a c lue what you're on about .
Boycey spoke to Tim f rom Death in Vegas courtesy of C a r l i n g
Death in Vegas's s e c o n d a l b u m The Contino Sessions is out now
Massive Competition!
10 tickets, 10 t-shirts,
beer + a whole lot more
Q u i t e h o w this has h a p p e n e d n o o n e is
su re , but s o m e h o w this w e e k we ' v e m a n -
a g e d o u r b igges t b l a g eve r at Felix
M u s i c . I s u p p o s e s o m e m igh t ca l l it luck ,
s o m e might ca l l it fate a n d s o m e may
even sugges t t h a i it's a l ie. But it 's not
a n d it 's g rea t .
The w i n n e r ge t ' s 10 free tickets to see
D e a t h in V e g a s o n the 7th N o v e m b e r at
S h e p h e r d ' s Bush E m p i r e , ten free T-shirts
a n d a b ig cra te of larger .
Phew ! Tha t ' s e n o u g h stuff f o r even the
saddes t f o o l to m a k e s o m e f r iends - o r
perfect if you ' r e the mos t p o p u l a r boy o r
gir l o n the b l o c k . Runners up prizes
r a n g e f r o m m o r e b e e r to t-shirts to b a g s ,
a n d there ' s t onnes so eve r yone s h o u l d
enter.
W h a t ' s m o r e is that the q u e s t i o n is easy
(the a n s w e r is in the ar t ic le to the left a n d
is p i c k e d out in b o l d ) , s o you ' ve n o
excuse w h a t s o e v e r fo r m i s s i ng out .
To enter s imp ly a n s w e r the q u e s t i o n
b e l o w a n d ge t y o u r a n s w e r s to
f e l i x @ i c . a c . u k o r p o p into the o f f i ce with
you r a n s w e r o n a free p o s t c a r d f r o m the
U n i o n a n d p o p it in the bo x with your
n a m e o n it. M o r e t han n i ce !
What
Death Vegas's
... a n d don ' t f o rge t to enter ! Howeve r ,
just in case you r entry d o e s n ' t w in you a
M A S S I V E n ight out o n the C a r l i n g Pre-
m i e r tour, you c o u l d a lways pay fo r you r-
self, but that w o u l d n ' t be as m u c h f un .
W o u l d it?
R I 1
.1
m m m 0 :
h
s 1 mi J 1
c x
frequency * A
Robbie Williams
She's The One / It's
Only Us
Recent ly R o b b i e has
mostly been head l in ing
stadiums - h o w d id that
h a p p e n ? O f this d o u b l e
A s ide, It's Only Us is just
a ve rage , but She's The
One is a n in fec t ious ,
p i ano- led love s o n g in
the Angels ve in , w h i c h ,
whi le hardly essential lis-
t e n i n g , wi l l p l e a se his
fans even more than a
cance l l ed lecture w o u l d
your ave rage IC student.
Ocean Colour Scene
So Low
(Island)
S o L o w f inds the O c e a n C o l o u r
S c e n e boys c l ea r l y in b a l l a d m o d e .
W h i l e pe r sona l l y I prefer t hem w h e n
they cut l o o s e , l ike o n Hundred Mile
High City, this is a we l l written s o n g
w i th n i c e v o c a l h a r m o n i e s a n d
unde r s t a t ed gu i tars . They've s h o w n
in the past t h o u g h that they're c a p a -
ble of d o i n g this type of s o n g far bet-
ter t h a n this , so a bit of a d i s a p p o i n t -
ment al l t o l d .
Geneva
Dollars in the heavens
(Nude)
G e n e v a return after a two year hiatus
with another t rademark soar ing ep ic .
The f a m i l i a r i ng red ien ts of c h o r a l
voca l s , high produc t ion va lues , a n d
sh immer ing celestial guitars c o m b i n e to
create a mov ing a n d thoughtful racket.
Mus ica l l y Dollars In The Heavens is not
a mi l l ion miles f rom early Suede , but
whilst their labe l mates pedd le the
sound of the gutter, G e n e v a br ing us
someth ing a bit more stellar.
ID
Shack
Pull Together
(Destiny)
A c lear single of the week
for me . Taken f rom the
rather w o n d e r f u l HMS
Fable, Pull Together is a
st irr ing, an them i c s o n g
with a great sentiment of
t a k i n g o n the w o r l d
together. It's the kind of
s o n g that b a n d s l ike
O C S , w h o they are sup-
port ing, w o u l d kill to write
Inhale
Feed
(Jam Inc)
F rom the m o m e n t y o u
hea r the o p e n i n g riff
you k n o w wha t you ' re
in fo r with this - angs t
rock . W h i l e they m a y
a d d s o m e k e y b o a r d s to
the m i x , there ' s n o
d e n y i n g tha t I nha l e
bas i ca l l y try p o o r l y to
r ep l i c a t e the l ikes of
N i r v a n a a n d R a d i o -
h e a d but w i t h o u t
a d d i n g a n y t h i n g of
the i r o w n . U n i n s p i r i n g .
The Lightning Seeds
Life's Too Short
(Epic)
A d e e p l y une th i ca l expe r imen t by M r
B r o u d i e , in w h i c h he sees fit to infect
o n e of his i n f a m o u s p o p c h o o n s
with the virus of d i s c o . The result is
a p r e d i c t a b l y s l i ck a n d s o u l l e s s
p r o d u c t in w h i c h the g rea t s a g e
o p e n s o u r m i n d s to his take o n life
the un iverse a n d every th ing . W a r n -
i n g : t hose pos s e s s i n g a c o n v e n t i o n -
al m o r a l o u t l o o k may be o f f e n d e d
' by the unsett l ing subtext of i n ces tu-
ous buggery .
Morgan
Miss Parker
(Source)
In w h i c h M o r g a n m a n a g e s to stuff a
fa i r p l e t ho r a of i deas into less t han
three minutes . S t range C a r i b b e a n
f l a v o u r e d o r g a n work u n d e r p i n n e d
by s o m e su i tab ly l a i d-back beats -
o n t o p we get the m u s i n g s of little
M o r g a n junior. M o r g a n sees fit to
th row in bits of b rass , s t r ings, stutter-
ing guitar , a n d un iden t i f i ab l e e l e c -
t r o n i c n o i s e w h e n a p p r o p r i a t e .
M o s t p l eas ing l y of a l l , he f inds r o o m
fo r p s e u d o - t h e r e m i n m e a n d e r i n g s
a n d a worthy bass l i ne .
Stereosister
Shamefaced
(Freakout records)
If this b a n d were p l a y -
ing in a p u b they c o u l d
be f o rg i v en as a b u n c h
of b l o k e s h a v i n g a
l a u g h . Un fo r tuna te l y ,
as s o m e c o k e d - u p
r e c o r d e x e c u t i v e h a s
d e c i d e d to u n l e a s h the i r
a r t i s t i c o u t p u t o n a
wea ry p u b l i c I fee l it my
duty to p r o v i d e a w a r n -
i n g . D o not u n d e r any
c i r c u m s t a n c e s buy this
i n s i p i d , m o r o n i c , de r i v -
ative w a n k . Like the
S e a h o r s e s c o v e r i n g the
Wonders tu f f .
.Singles
by
Michael...
1 c
Urusei Yatsura
Yon Kyoku In EP
(limit break)
Urusei Yatsura are o n e of
those bands w h o shou ld be
amaz ing l y popular , but no-
one's ever hea rd of t hem.
Imagine, if you wi l l , the a t m os -
phere in an intimate venue
when this b a n d , the superb
Scottish successor to the Pix-
ies, hits the stage letting fly
with viciously g o o d alternative
rock. The songs Kewpies Like
Wa te rme lon a n d S la in By Elf
have a lyrical sillyness not seen
s ince Terrorv is ion 's D o g
C h e w e d The H a n d l e , bely ing
the e m o t i o n a l m e s s a g e
beneath .
This latest EP is all that, yet a
little m o r e - da r e I say -
mature? It takes a new d i rec-
tion like the proverb ia l fresh
new pa i r of pants ; strange at
first, then just b e c o m e s a part
of y o u . Kayt ron ica is the first
track a n d the most t rad i t iona l-
ly Yatsura with s o m e fami l i a r
h igh p i tch t w a n g i n g . Still
Exp lod ing eases us into new
u n e x p l o r e d terr i tory a n d
sounds suspic iously like their
fe l low Scots, Idlewild. Next up ,
the acoust i c , N o b o d y knows
we're Stars is sensitive a n d
mel low, if a little frustrated. W e
finish on M o t h e r of the M B K , a
very unusua l s o n g wh ich c a n
only be desc r ibed as be ing
like a superpos i t ion (please
don't hit me , please) of the
other three songs .
H a r d y
frequency . A
9
Talking All That Jazz
London Jazz Festival -12 to 21 November
You have to a d m i t that jazz is best en j o ye d w h e n l is tened to in a s m a l l ,
noisy, s m o k y c l u b , o v e r c r o w d e d by sexy a n d c lassy c o u p l e s . H o w e v e r ,
s o m e artists' i n t e rn a t i on a l success m e a n s they c a n on ly p e r f o r m in b i g
c o n c e r t ha l l s o n the i r w o r l d t o u r s ; a n d that m e a n s n o a t m o s p h e r e ,
l a ck of style e t c . . . doesn ' t it? W e l l , m a y b e not : there was a C u b a n
B o n a n z a at the B a r b i c a n H a l l o n Fr iday 15th with the b a n d s r e s p o n -
s ib l e f o r the s o u n d t rack of the h igh ly success fu l f i lm ' B u e n a V i s t a
S o c i a l C l u b ' .
They m a y have b e e n a r o u n d 5 0 years o l d o n a v e r a g e , but the m u s i c
w a s f a b u l o u s . The rhythms were i r res ist ib le a n d most of the c r o w d
p rog res s i v e l y s tar ted d a n c i n g in the a i s l es ! F u r t h e r m o r e , at the e n d of
the f i e s t a 1 , the b a n d inv i ted s o m e of the c r o w d to d a n c e on s t age . The
C u b a n f ire h a d sent the B a r b i c a n ha l l o n a o n e way trip to S a n t i a g o !
Th is p roves that jazz conce r t s don ' t h a ve to be r e p e n t a n c e , a n d m o r e
impor t an t l y , they're the on l y way to l isten to the best m u s i c i a n s a l i v e !
A n d tha t ' s not e x a g g e r a t i n g .
That 's why you s h o u l d try a n d get t ickets to s o m e of the acts o n o f fe r
at the L o n d o n J azz Fest iva l in N o v e m b e r . The Z a w i n u l S y n d i c a t e ,
B r a n d f o r d M a r s a l i s , D i a n n e Reeves a n d Taj M a h a l a re s o m e of the
jazz l e g e n d s c o m i n g to L o n d o n , a n d they wi l l assist Brit ish f ront s c e n e
artists l ike C o u r t n e y P ine a n d A n d y S h e p p a r d in o f f e r i ng s imp ly the
best jazz conce r t s y o u c a n get .
T h e two acts that wi l l steal the s h o w , a r e : D i a n n e Reeves a n d J o e Z a w -
i n u l . D i a n n e Reeves is a n o t h e r o n e of these artists w h o c a n set any
c o n c e r t ha l l o n f i r e ; a n d so she d i d a yea r a g o at the Roya l Fest iva l
H a l l , p a c k e d with y o u n g b l a c k w o m e n w h o cou ldn ' t s top exp res s i ng
the i r love f o r the m u s i c . H e r v o i c e is i r res is t ib le , he r scat i m p r o v i s a -
t ions w o u l d m a k e a p a r a l y z e d 90-yea r-o ld s t and up a n d d a n c e , a n d
her s o n g s a b o u t f i gh t i ng f o r surv iva l a n d b e i n g s t rong m a k e he r s h o w
u n m i s s a b l e bo th f o r the m u s i c a n d fo r the i deas c o n v e y e d . J o e Z a w -
i n u l , k e y b o a r d i s t f o u n d e r of the g r o u n d b r e a k i n g g r o u p 'Wea the r
Report ' , mixes funk , r o ck , s a m p l e s a n d jazz to revive M i l e Dav i s ' e l e c -
tric p e r i o d . H is m u s i c is very u p b e a t , a n d I p r o m i s e y o u , you won ' t
s l e ep t h r o u g h that o n e !
T h e s e c o n c e r t s aren ' t exact ly c h e a p , a n d y o u have to b o o k in a d v a n c e
to ge t the best seats f o r the lowest p r i c e s ; but n o jazz-fan s h o u l d miss
t h e m . N i c e .
Etienne
H e r e ' s a list o f the c h o i c e s t cuts f r o m the
L o n d o n J azz Fest iva l . H o p e f u l l y I'll be
m a k i n g it to m o r e t han just a few of
these so m a y b e I'll see you there?
G r e a t !
14th November
Courtney Pine @ Hammersmith Apollo
The t o r c h b e a r e r of British J azz in recent
years . G u e s t s wi l l b r i n g jazz a n d hip-
h o p f r o m bo th s ides of the A t l an t i c .
14th November
Khaled @ Royal Festival Hall
The t o w e r i n g f igure of r a i . A p r o m i s i n g
b luesy n ight with exot i c f l avo rs .
J5fh November
Brandford Marsalis @ Royal Festival Hall
A rare L o n d o n a p p e a r a n c e f o r the
y o u n g sax l e g e n d , p r o m o t i n g his p h e -
n o m e n a l last r e l e a se : ' Requ i em ' .
16th November
The Zawinul Syndicate @ Barbican Centre
See ar t i c le
16th November
Taj Mahal @ Royal Festival Hall
T h e A m e r i c a n b lues l e g e n d in a f a s c i -
na t ing adven tu r e b e t w e e n b lues a n d his
A f r i c a n roots .
20th November
Andy Sheppard @ Royal Festival Hall
C a r l a B ley a n d S teve S w a l l o w wi l l
a c c o m p a n y the s u p e r b sax player. Three
m u s i c i a n s at the t o p of the i r art.
2?sf November
Dianne Reeves @ Royal festival Hall
See ar t i c le .
Etienne
c x
frequency * A i r ~ i j
I til i l | l : i r ~ i
Planet V
@ Fabric
The o p e n i n g n ight at o n e of
London ' s newly b i l l ed 'super-
c lubs ' w a s a d r u m - n - b a s s
s p e c i a l , w i th p o s s i b l y the
largest n u m b e r of DJ's o n
any l ine up this year. First up
was O p t i c a l , w h o p l a y e d his
cus tomary h a r d bass l i nes . It
was o b v i o u s that there was
n o such th ing as a w a r m up
here : the c r o w d was h a v i n g
it f r o m the start.
The c l u b w a s split into three
r o o m s . Two w e r e p l a y i n g
d rum-n-bass , with the th i rd
r o o m p l a y i ng host to s o m e
of the finest h i p - h o p a n d
g a r a g e DJ's a r o u n d . T h e
s e c o n d r o o m has w i thou t
d o u b t a l r e a d y b e c o m e o n e
of the largest a t t rac t ions of
Fab r i c : u n d e r n e a t h the f l o o r
is a set of sp r i ng l o a d e d sub-
w o o f e r s , w h i c h m a k e the
f l o o r v ibra te with the bass .
This t h ing w a s o n a n o t h e r
l eve l , a n d w h e n Ron i S ize
d r o p p e d the beats the f l o o r
went m a d .
Top pe r fo rmers of the n ight
were A d a m F a n d J . M a j i k ,
w h o p l a y e d to a p a c k e d
m a i n r o o m . F a b i o t o o k o n
a n o t h e r l eve l a n d j a z z e d
th ings up with a l a id b a c k
set. How ev e r , it was A n d y C
w h o real ly r i p p e d the p l a c e
u p , d r o p p i n g n o n - s t o p
ro l l i ng b-lines. Top v e n u e ,
-top n ight , t o p t ime a l l r o u n d .
G a v
Techtonics @ The Pleasure Rooms
.. River Journey...
C l u b e x p e r i e n c e s n e v e r fa i l t o a m a z e m e . F r o m n e v e r h e a r d b e f o r e
m a d t u n e s , to the p e o p l e y o u m e e t - i t 's a l w a y s a l a u g h . T h a t ' s
w h a t m a k e s w r i t i n g a r t i c l e s a b o u t t h e m so m u c h f u n . Th i s w e e k
h o w e v e r s e e s a r e m a r k a b l e f irst f o r t h e c l u b p a g e in Fe l ix . Yes ,
s o m e h o w I've g o t a p o e m f o r y o u ! Last F r i day n i g h t w a s s p e n t in
T h e P l e a s u r e R o o m s f o r the i r m a s h up T e c h t o n i c s c l u b , a n d it w a s
d e f i n i t e l y a g o o d n i g h t - p e r h a p s t o o g o o d f o r m e to put in to
w o r d s . S o I w o n ' t . I ns tead I'll pas s o n this p o e m , w h i c h w a s g i v e n
to m e o n the n i g h t . A l t h o u g h i t 's not m u c h to d o wi th c l u b b i n g it
p r o v i d e s be t t e r r e a d i n g t h a n t h e m a s h tha t I n o r m a l l y c o m e o u t
wi th so a g a i n I'll shut u p a n d let y o u r e a d the g o o d stuff. . .
J a m e s
River Journey by Roslyn Taylor
" O C a p t a i n o f my s h i p , w h e r e d o e s the r iver l e a d ? "
"To the s e a ! To t h e s e a ! O n a j o u r n e y t o the s e a ! "
S p r u n g f r o m the b e d r o c k of my hea r t
F e d by the w e l l s p r i n g o f my y o u t h
A n d the t e n d e r e s t of t ea r s
Th i s r i ve r o f l o v e in m e
W i n d i n g its w i l f u l w a y t h r o u g h the s e a s o n s o f my s o u l
M e l t e d e m o t i o n in fu l l f l o o d
A f o r c e t o o p o w e r f u l to d a m
A c u r r e n t t o o swift t o resist
I a m s w e p t a w a y t o a g a i n s t a l l be t te r j u d g e m e n t
W i t h o u t c o n t r o l in t h e s e r a p i d s o f t h e s o u l
M y h e a r t , t o o f l imsy a cra f t t o sa i l in these wa t e r s
Is s h i p w r e c k e d o n the g a g g e d r o c k s of r e a s o n
B r o k e n a n d d i s c a r d e d by the f l o o d of first l o v e
N o l o n g e r a s e a w o r t h y vesse l
" A b a n d o n s h i p ! " t he c a p t a i n c r i e s
T h o u g h he h a s s t r u g g l e d m a n f u l l y
To s tee r us f r o m this f a t e fu l c o u r s e
T h e cry c o m e s t o o la te f o r m e
I a m t a k e n a w a y wi th h e r to a w a t e r y g r a v e
W h e r e the c a l m e r c u r r e n t s d w e l l
To the d e s t i n a t i o n of my h e a r t
I h a v e a l w a y s k n o w n to be
"To the s e a ! To the s e a ! To a n d e n d i n g in the s e a . "
Recommended
Clubbing
If you l ike a lot of c h o c o l a t e o n y o u r b i s-
cu i t , j o in o u r c l u b . O r g o to o n e of the
f o l l o w i n g .
Monday 1st November
Skin Two Rubber Ball @ Fabric; £38
W i t h a strict r u b b e r a n d P V C dress c o d e
this is the a n n u a l b a s h fo r the best of the
fet ish c l u b s . I s u p p o s e it 's not fo r the
n a r r o w m i n d e d o r those short of c a s h ,
but if you ' r e up fo r it you can ' t fa i l to
h a v e a g o o d t ime . I'm a f r a i d I'm just a
bit t o o t imid f o r this o n e t h o u g h .
THIS! 6th Birthday @ Bar Rhumba; £4
A n d then they we re six! Yes, G i l l e s Peter-
s o n a n d c o get a n o t h e r m en t i on he re ,
but it rea l ly is a n exce l l en t n ight a n d fo r
this party they ' l l be j o i n e d by o r i g i n a l
res ident J a m e s Lave l l e . G e t d o w n .
Tuesday 2nd November
Bullit @ The Dogstar; FREE!
Shit ho t h i p h o p m e a n s plenty o f oppu r -
tunit ies fo r b o p p i n g at this Br ixton v e n u e .
It's a l so f ree a n d o p e n till two . Y o u ' d
have to miss y o u r n ight at La S c a n d a l e
t h o u g h ! D i l e m m a s , d i l e m m a s !
Wednesday 3rd November
Cafe Noir @ Cafe de Paris; £12
H o s t e d by the C a r w a r s h t e a m , this night
is b e c o m i n g o n e of the wi ldest nights on
the c l u b c i rcui t . A p p a r e n t l y there a re
w o m e n d r e s s e d in f r e s h frui t a n d
w h i p p e d c r e a m ly ing o n tab les in the
p l a c e . N e e d I say m o r e ?
Swerve @ The Velvet Rooms; £5
Future funk a n d f u n , f u n , fun f r o m m a s -
ter DJ F a b i o a n d his pa l s . A l w a y s f un .
To have your club added to this list just
invite us along, we'll check it out and if
we like it we'll put it down
e-mail: [email protected]
phone: 020 7594 8072 ask for James
S I S - THE BUSINESS SOCIETY *. V * -V *t * * *• * » * * * # * •* * * * * » « * * * *• * » * * * W * * * » « * * * * * *> #• * * * * * * *> *- * * : * » * : * * * : *
Register for Event Updates at www.su.ic.ac.uk/sis
K P M G
How to become a partner
in a big consultancy y
g
G
e
s x
m e t h o d ^
Kronos Quartet o Philip Glass Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee... Time's running out
V i d e o c o m p l e t e with s o u n d t r a c k a n d C D a v a i l a b l e
Be l a Lugosi 's suave p e r f o r m a n c e in the 1 931 f i lm of
D r a c u l a is w ide l y c o n s i d e r e d to be the c l ass i c inter-
pre ta t ion of B r a m Stoker 's b l o o d s u c k e r C o u n t .
Techn i ca l l imi ta t ions of the t ime m e a n t that this ear l y
' talkie ' l a c k e d a s c o r e . N o w , two of the l e a d i n g f i g -
ures in c o n t e m p o r a r y m u s i c , the K r o n o s Q u a r t e t
a n d c o m p o s e r Ph i l ip G l a s s , have j o i n e d fo r ces to
rectify this a n o m a l y .
Reviews of the C D of this new s o u n d t r a c k have b e e n
s o m e w h a t l u k e w a r m ; the m u s i c suffers f r o m G l a s s '
t endency to re-use a n d recyc le t h e m e s f r o m ea r l i e r
works - in this c a s e , his p rev ious str ing quar te ts .
This isn't ent irely a b a d t h i n g , as his str ing quar te ts
a re e x c e e d i n g l y f ine p i e ces of m u s i c : n e w l isteners
cer ta in ly won' t suffer. Fo r those with p rev ious e x p e -
r ience of G l a s s ' m u s i c , however , the s o u n d t r a c k
a l o n e m a y be a d i s a p p o i n t m e n t .
The live p e r f o r m a n c e is a d i f ferent matter. The K r o -
nos Q u a r t e t - j o i n e d by the c o m p o s e r o n k e y b o a r d s
- p e r f o r m b e h i n d a semi- t rans lucent s c r e e n , o n t o
w h i c h the f i lm is p r o j e c t e d . As the l igh t ing that fa l ls
o n t h e m c h a n g e s , so they f a d e in a n d ou t of v i s i b i l -
ity, l ike ghos ts in the b a c k g r o u n d of the f i l m . Ifs a
s tunn ing ly a t m o s p h e r i c effect that neve r intrudes
u p o n the f i l m , on ly a d d s to it.
Ifs in this context that the mus i c c o m e s into its o w n .
Supe rb l y p e r f o r m e d , it g o e s a l o n g w a y to res tor ing
s o m e of the a t m o s p h e r e of d a r k n e s s the f i lm must
have h a d fo r 1931 a u d i e n c e s . If s o m e aspec t s of
the f i lm are m o r e a m u s i n g than 'horr i f ic ' f o r a m o d -
ern a u d i e n c e , G l a s s ' s co re p rov ides a d e l i c i o u s l y
s p o o k y b a c k g r o u n d that lets us l a u g h w i th , a n d not
at, this mos t c e l e b r a t e d of h o r r o r f l i cks . A l t h o u g h
your rev iewer is not a w a r e of any future U K pe r-
f o r m a n c e s of ' D r a c u l a ' , a v i d e o of the f i l m , c o m -
plete with the new s o u n d t r a c k , has b e e n r e l e a sed by
Un i ve r sa l S tud ios .
Proud Ga l l e r i e s
B u c k i n g h a m Street. Neares t Tube C h a r r i n g C ros s
F ioat like a butterfly, sting like a bee . . . . 25 serene p h o t o g r a p h s
show Al i in t ra in ing before humi l ia t ing the f ea r some G e o r g e
F o r e m a n
Th ink of M o h a m m a d A l i , think of the greatest box ing l egend that
ever re igned in the seventies. A m a n full of ' cocksu re a r r o g a n c e '
but ' hea r ten ing humi l i ty ' , he often pred ic ted wh i ch rounds he
was g o i n g to win his fights. His fights were not only enterta in ing
but a l so resourceful to the y o u n g box ing genera t ion of that t ime.
T h e n , every k id in the b lock wanted to box like A l i . They b o u g h t
every souven i r of h im a n d a lot of them even s igned up for a m a -
teur box ing , but unfortunately never m a d e it pro .
Every on e of his fights was often p r e c e d e d by a great dea l of
s h o w m a n s h i p a n d Al i was a lways at the centre of it a l l . This inf lu-
ence a l on e m a d e his fights more capt ivat ing as mi l l ions w o r l d -
w ide turn on their screens to see Al i live up to his p romise . H e
rarely d i s appo in t ed , often w inn ing in a un ique f a sh ion . This
c o u l d never have been truer than in Za i re in O c t o b e r 1 9 7 4
when Al i fought a n d beat G e o r g e F o r e m a n with a techn ica l
knockou t in round eight. After watch ing a replay of that f ight on
the ' b i g ' screens of Proud Ga l l e r i e s , to say that I was flabber-
gasted w o u l d be a n understatement. W h e n he c l a i m e d to ' f loat
like a butterfly, sting like a bee ' few c o u l d a rgue .
That was the legendary Rumble in the Jung le . I have never seen
a pro box with so m u c h skil l , speed a n d power, but more i m p o r -
tantly, with inte l l igence aga inst a more daunt ing o p p o n e n t . A fact
that w o u l d m a k e M i k e Tyson quite jea lous .
M a n y w h o k n o w h im wel l c o m m e n d e d his 'hear ten ing humi l i ty ' ,
his ' a m a z i n g sense of h u m o u r ' a n d his 'artistic abi l i ty ' . A great
inspirat ion to many, of w h o m was p h o t o g r a p h e r D a v i d K ing .
'Let's get this straight (folks),' sa id K ing in a recent interview, ' I
was not interested in box ing . I was interested in A l i . His abil ity
t r anscended box ing . ' K ing 's 2 5 b lack a n d white p h o t o g r a p h s
cap tu red Al i in t ra in ing in the Pennsylvania mounta ins before that
l egendary fight that many critics regard as the most cruc ia l f ight
of his career. Al l the pictures are s i gned , da t ed a n d n u m b e r e d
o n the reverse side.
to see
At the River S ide studios - nea r-
est tube H a m m e r s m i t h .
R o m e o e G i u l i e t t a . He re it is
a g a i n , the c l ass i c love story.
T h e o r i g i n a l l a n g u a g e of
S h a k e s p e a r e set to the mus i c
of Be l l in i . C o m b i n e d with e l e-
ments o f puppet ry a n d C o r n -
m e d i a dell'arte.
Finishes 7th November
T h e S L G (South L o n d o n
Ga l l e r y ) is o r i g i n a l a n d expe r i -
menta l with its d isp lays . Two of
them are f in i sh ing this w e e k
a n d l o o k we l l wo r th the t r ip ;
Intimate H o u s e a n d F rancesco
V i l a l t a - O l l e .
Intimate H o u s e uses the s tage
a n d w h o l e s p a c e to create a n
" Int imate S p a c e with the a u d i -
e n c e " This s eems to m e to be
either h igh ly o r i g i na l o r h ighly
e m b a r r a s s i n g .
Finishes 6th November
F r a n c e s c o V i l a l t a - O l l e
at tempts to redef ine w o m e n as
c o n s t r u c t e d iden t i t i e s . She
d o e s this t h r o u g h the e x p l o -
rat ion of t hemes such as s u b -
ject iv i ty, sexua l i t y , l a n g u a g e
a n d des i re .
Finishes 2nd November
ID J o s e p h ID Henry Odil Ben
1 s 5
b o o k s Cool Classics and
Books You Should
Have Read
Timeless ! G r o u n d b r e a k i n g ! Insp i ra t iona l ! A w o r k
of p r o f o u n d cul tura l i m p o r t a n c e ! A d a m n e d
g o o d r e a d ! C o o l C l a s s i c s a n d Books Y S H R , the
Felix feature where y o u get to learn a b o u t o l d
b o o k s that m a k e you s e e m m o r e cul tural ly awa re
than you really a re , a n d m a y b e even read o n e .
A r thu r i an l e g e n d has recent ly f a l l en into d i s r epu te . A s p e r h a p s o n e of the m o r e easi ly a c c e s s e d stories of
Eng l i sh/Ce l t i c myth it has in turns b e e n r o m a n t i c i s e d , d e m y t h i c i s e d , o ve r s imp l i f i ed a n d used as f o d d e r fo r S a tu rday
a f t e r n o o n t e l ev i s i on . A n d o n a less i n n o c e n t note I c a n say that the n a m e Lance lo t has b e c o m e s y n o n y m o u s with t e l -
ev i s ion p r o g r a m m e s i n vo l v i ng a c r i ngewor thy p lot a n d lad ies of a d u b i o u s nature .
Yet I have p l a c e d mysel f in the unce r t a i n pos i t i on of try ing to p e r s u a d e o the r p e o p l e to r e ad The O n c e a n d Future
K ing w h i c h is u n d e n i a b l y a c l a s s i c nove l d e a l i n g with the A r thu r i an cyc l e , 'K ing A r thu r a n d the Kn ights of the R o u n d
Table ' f o r t hose less en thus ias t i c t han m e .
It is essent ia l l y a quar te t of b o o k s of w h i c h the first, The S w o r d in the S tone is p r o b a b l y the best k n o w n - p e r h a p s
t h r o u g h the a n i m a t e d ve r s i on r e l e a s e d severa l years a g o if not in the written f o r m . The S w o r d in the S tone is a b e a u -
tiful t a l e . The cha ra c t e r s a re d e f i n e d a n d d e s c r i b e d in a l m o s t c o m p l e t e l y h u m o u r o u s terms a n d that h u m o u r is w o n -
derful ly Eng l i sh . O f the w h o l e quar te t this sec t i on is the l ightest in t o n e a n d cheer fu l les t in subject matter ; the ta le of
a sma l l boy, a f f ec t iona te l y k n o w n as the W a r t , g r o w i n g u p in a fantas t i c e n v i r o n m e n t u n a w a r e that he is o n e d a y to
be the K i n g . It m a y s o u n d s i m p l e , it m a y even s o u n d pre ten t ious , but the wr i t ing is so de t a i l ed a n d so en te r t a in ing
that a n o l d e r r e a d e r c a n f i nd i m m e n s e sa t i s fac t ion in it.
It is not a rea l is t ic t a l e in any sense of the w o r d ; s i tuat ions a re f anc i fu l a n d i m ag i n a t i v e in the ex t reme , excep t pe r-
haps fo r the r a n d o m l e c tu res ' o n h o w heavy a r m o u r real ly w a s in the o l d days a n d h o w that restr icted the p a c e of a
d u e l . The p r o b l e m s that the W a r t e n c o u n t e r s a s he g r o w s up tend to be of the p h i l o s o p h i c a l a n d theore t i ca l k ind ra ther
t han rude a n d d a m a g i n g e n c o u n t e r s with the ha rshness of l ife.
But this m a k e s f o r a n i n n o c e n t , l ight , w o n d e r f u l l y s en t imen ta l , s i t-by-the-f i re-and-munch-Chr is tmas p u d type r e a d .
W h i c h is neve r a b a d t h i n g , n o mat te r wha t the l iterary types say.
The o the r three b o o k s c o n t a i n e d wi th in The O n c e a n d Future K i n g d e a l with the m a i n cha rac t e r s a n d the events l e a d -
ing up to the des t ruc t i on of the R o u n d Table a n d the d e a t h of Arthur. C o n s e q u e n t l y these b o o k s d o not have the br ight
chee r fu lness that is i nhe ren t in T h e S w o r d in the S tone . A s adu l ts the cha rac te r s a re a l l o w e d to have m o r e c o m p l e x
e m o t i o n s a n d to the re fo re exist in a m u c h m o r e c o m p l i c a t e d w o r l d . A l l except fo r A r thu r that is, w h o reta ins the s i m -
ple e m o t i o n s a n d i d e a l i s a t i o n s of his c h i l d h o o d . This is w h e r e the nove l as a w h o l e d e v e l o p s its pa th os . The cent ra l
c h a r a c t e r has the i n n o c e n c e of a s te reo typ i ca l ch i l d whi lst a l l the cha rac te r s s u r r o u n d i n g h im a re i n v o l v e d in s o m e
s c h e m e o r p lo t . W h a t I l ove a b o u t these three b o o k s is that the a u t h o r d o e s not d e a l t o o harshly with the ' b a d ' c h a r -
ac te rs ; he shows t h e m to b e h u m a n , that a n y o n e c o u l d m a k e the mis takes that these cha rac t e r s m a k e .
I r e c o m m e n d this to those w h o love r e a d i n g a b o u t d i f ferent p e o p l e , to those w h o love myths, to those w h o wan t to
lose t hemse l ves fo r a little wh i l e in a w o r l d that is n i ce r t han IC , a n d to those with lots of w o r k to d o .
Fl ic
Felix Recommends E a c h of the b o o k s w h i c h is r ev i ewed in Felix c a n be p u r c h a s e d f r o m the Waters tone ' s b o o k store o n c a m p u s , next
to the m a i n l ibrary, at a d i s c o u n t of 2 0 % d u r i n g the w e e k of the review. Waters tone ' s a i m is to p r o m o t e r e a d i n g in
g e n e r a l , by i m p r o v i n g the ava i l ab i l i t y o r titles r e c o m m e n d e d a n d by o f fe r ing them to Felix readers at a r e d u c e d
p r i ce . Be sure to s top by the store a n d see if you a g r e e with o u r rev iews.
Fugitive
Pieces, Anne
Micheals
Wr i t t en as a m e m o i r , start-
i ng wi th y o u t h a g a i n s t the
b a c k - d r o p of the S e c o n d
W o r l d W a r a n d the H o l o -
c a u s t , Fug i t i ve P i eces is a
n o v e l o f s i n g u l a r l y beau t i f u l
p r o s e a n d p o w e r f u l image r y .
T h e first nove l by M i c h e a l s ,
w h o p r i o r t o P i e c e s w a s
k n o w n f o r he r ski l ls as a
p o e t , FP ' d e q l s w i th history,
m e m o r y , l o v e , c rue l ty a n d
the c a p r i c i o u s n a t u r e of
t i m e .
A r ev i ew c a n n o t d o just ice
to the t ask of e x p l a i n i n g
w h a t m a k e s this b o o k so
s p e c i a l . It is f i l l ed with short
s e n s u a l e p i s o d e s t h r o u g h
w h i c h the r e c o l l e c t i o n s of
J a k o b B e e r b e c o m e his
story. F o r e x a m p l e , the m u r -
d e r of his p a r e n t s w h i l e
J a k o b h i d e s :
' N o i s e s n e v e r h e a r d b e f o r e
t o r n f r o m my f a t h e r ' s
m o u t h . T h e n s i l e n c e . M y
m o t h e r h a d b e e n s e w i n g a
b u t t o n o n my shirt . S h e kept
he r bu t tons in a c h i p p e d
sauce r . I h e a r d the r im of the
s a u c e r in c i r c l e s o n the f loor .
I h e a r d the sp ray of bu t tons ,
little wh i t e t e e t h . '
R e a d it.
Wa te rs tone ' s is o p e n M o n d a y - F r i d a y 9 : 0 0 a m to 7 : 0 0 p m a n d Sa tu rday 1 0 : 0 0 a m to 5 : 0 0 p m . • Russel l
6 s x
s c r e e n • �� • • • • • • ; :
Hav ing seen their debut project The Blair Wi tch Pro-
ject storm to massive f inanc ia l a n d critical success
across the wor ld , directors Dan ie l Myr ick a n d
Edua rdo Sanchez are now two of the hottest p r o p -
erties in H o l l y w o o d . So are they really a c o u p l e of
talented you n g hopefu ls o r a pa i r of mov ie brats?
We l l , here's your c h a n c e to f ind out, with ou r very
own interview.
Your brain is tell ing you it's real a n d you're trying to
tell yourself it's not so it's easy to thing it's real .
Is it true that Heather Donahue earned a knife with
her during the shooting of the film?
DAN: Yeah , it was a pretty big knife. H e r m o m d i d -
n't want her to d o the film with a bunch of strangers
in a w o o d so she bought this big knife. Just in case .
really fortunate with an eight minute trailer we p ro-
d u c e d , as John Pearson had a show ca l led 'Split
Screen' in N e w York City a n d wanted to air ou r
trailer on that show so he pa i d us s o m e money for
the rights to that and it he lped us out. W e didn't
have to raise a lot, but $ 3 0 , 0 0 0 when you're b roke
might as well be $ 3 0 mi l l ion - but we m a n a g e d to
scrape it together.
Are you planning to do any sequels or prequels to
The Blair Witch Project?
ED: We're ta lk ing to Art isan a b o u t d o i n g anothe r
Blair f i lm. It's not g o i n g to be a sequel but we have
an idea for a prequel that is pretty c o o l but we're
g o i n g to have to see if they're g o n n a let us d o it or
not. It's really up to them. They own the fi lm n o w ;
they o w n Blair W i t ch . It looks like they might let us
d o it but it has to be the right t ime for us and the
right t ime for them.
What were Heather, Josh and Michael like after the
film shoot?
DAN: W h a t you guys watch is 8 2 minutes of a b o u t
twenty hours of raw foo tage . They knew it was us
running a r o u n d the tent 'cos we shot the fi lm in this
who le real-time format were we had the actors g o
out there and run this improv isa t ion s i tuat ion. The
whole process was a n exper iment. It was tough on
everybody. W e had a 2 4 7 shoot on ou r side as
wel l . O n one s ide, it was very t ough a n d very d r a i n -
ing but as a n actor, they had the opportunity to d o
an eight-day play 2 4 hours a day in charac te r with
total creative f r e e d o m . They're p robab l y never
g o n n a get that opportunity a g a i n . As tiring as it was
at the e n d , it was really reward ing for everybody.
Do you know of anyone who saw the film and
thought it was real?
Ed: A friend of ours t ook the mov ie w h e n we had
just f inished edit ing it a n d p o p p e d it into his V C R at
h o m e a n d his m o m e n d e d up watch ing it a n d he
didn't tell her it wasn't real . Everybody has a c a m -
corder a n d as s o o n as a fr iend pops in a vaca t ion
v ideo you're conv inced it's real because there's
shaky c a m e r a a n d the s a m e th ing works for Blair.
Was there any inspiration from films like Man Bites
Dog and Cannibal Holocaust?
ED: I've never actually seen ' M a n Bites D o g ' , it's on e
that's on a long list of films to see when we get
h o m e . As for C a n n i b a l Ho locaus t we didn't f ind out
that f i lm existed until s o m e o n e at Sundance told us
that it h ad the same premise as Blair W i t ch . So we
went h o m e a n d went to a v ideo store that rent r ea l-
ly obscure boo t l eg type films and we checked it out.
It's the exact s ame premise as Blair. This d o c u m e n -
tary c rew goes to Peru or South A m e r i c a in search
of a cann iba l tribe a n d they f ind it a n d never get
out. I guess they are eaten. W e didn't even finish it.
It's pretty brutal . They kill an ima ls on screen a n d
that's their gore . There's on e scene where we're sure
they use a h u m a n corpse for on e of the effects.
W h a t really inspired Blair were those o ld d o c u m e n -
taries. In the states they had these p s e u d o - d o c u -
mentaries with Leonard N i m o y narrat ing abou t
U F O ' s , B igfoot and stuff like that and as kids Ed
a n d I were terrified by those things so that was rea l-
ly the inspirat ion beh ind Blair.
Do you think the film works better on the big screen
or will it be better on video?
Ed: I think it works well on the big screen but I think
it does work better o n v ideo . A lot of peop l e w h o
g o to the mov ie say that f i lm didn't scare them a n d
I a lways write to them a n d say "When the mov ie
c o m e s out on v ideo , rent it, g o to your house a lone
at 1 a m and p o p it in a n d tell me if it scared you. " I
think it works better that way
Did you find it easy to finance the film?
Dan: N o , most of the f inanc ing was out of our own
credit cards , savings, fr iends, and family. W e were
Did you actually attempt to show what was harass-
ing the actors in the film?
Dan: Back to the documenta r i e s of the seventies -
there's really nothing conc lus ive abou t them. You
see a grainy pho to of a U F O o r Bigfoot running
th rough the w o o d s . It was the real ism abou t those
things at the t ime that got to us. O u r pr ime d i rec-
tive was to keep everything real . W e didn't have the
budget o r technica l know-how to show someth ing
that was conv inc ing ly real . A lmos t out of necessity,
we fo l lowed this line of keep ing it real . Anyth ing in
the raw foo tage that l o o k e d cont r i ved ; we got rid of
it.
Do you think you are marketing a myth or concept
rather than just a film?
Dan: Exactly, yes. I think that's what's un ique abou t
Blair W i tch . That it is a who l e wor ld that it is a who le
mythology a n d the fi lm you see is really just a part
of it. It didn't start out that way but it certainly
evo lved over t ime. That's what I loved about Star
Wars o r Star Trek. They had a who l e wor ld created
a r o u n d those films a n d on a smal l level that's what
we d id with Blair W i t ch . The w e b site has enab l ed
us to have this comp lemen ta r y exper ience that
showed the mythology a b o u t the mov ie a n d it was
definitely this c o m p o n e n t thing of this b igger th ing.
Is the film called The Blair Witch Project after Linda
Blair in The Exorcist?
Dan: it was n a m e d after Blair h igh schoo l in M a r y -
land and it's a g o o d gener ic n a m e that sound like
a bunch of other mythology in that a rea so it just
b l ended in with truth. There's no reference to The
Exorcist in any way; it's just co in c idence .
He len
1 s 7
screen
CINEMA What's on at ICU Cinema Vampires
ODEO Pushing Tin Competition
At las t , I h a v e w i t n e s s e d the n e w l o o k I C U
c i n e m a f o r myse l f . G o n e a r e the d a y s
w h e n y o u c o u l d o n l y h e a r the f i l m if y o u
b o r r o w e d y o u r g r a n n y ' s h e a r i n g a i d .
T h a n k s t o the m a r v e l l o u s n e w D o l b y D i g i -
tal s o u n d , y o u d o n ' t h a v e t o l i p - r e a d a n y -
m o r e . Y o u d o n ' t e v e n h a v e t o s q u i n t a n y -
m o r e w h e n the f o c u s g o e s as they 've f i n a l -
ly s o r t e d tha t o u t . S o , hey p r e s t o , w e n o w
h a v e a m a s s i v e s c r e e n tha t ge ts u s e d to it's
fu l l p o t e n t i a l a n d is a c r e d i t t o o u r U n i o n .
Th i s w e e k I C U c i n e m a is s h o w i n g the
c l e v e r a n d f u n n y G o ! a l o n g s i d e the a l l -
a c t i o n T h o m a s C r o w n A f f a i r . B o t h f i lms
a r e b e i n g s h o w n o n M o n d a y a n d T u e s d a y
e v e n i n g .
G o ! is a story t o l d f r o m t h r e e p e r s p e c t i v e s .
It's a b o u t a b u n c h o f y o u n g C a l i f o r n i a n s
t ry ing t o ge t s o m e c a s h , d o a n d d e a l s o m e
d r u g s , a n d a c q u i r e sex in Las V e g a s . T h e y
a l l just w a n t t o e x p e r i e n c e the rush o f l i f e .
G o ! is sor t o f a t e e n f l i c k bu t d o n ' t b e put
off as it is d e f i n i t e l y w o r t h w a t c h i n g .
T h e T h o m a s C r o w n A f f a i r s tars P i e r ce
B r o s n a n a n d Rene R u s s o in a r e m a k e of
this f i l m a b o u t a b o r e d m i l l i o n a i r e w h o
l ikes to s tea l art . It tu rns i n t o a c o m e d y
w h e n the l e a d i n g c h a r a c t e r s f a l l in l o v e
a n d Russo 's c h a r a c t e r f i n d s he r se l f m a k i n g
a t o u g h d e c i s i o n .
In c a s e y o u haven ' t f o u n d t h e c i n e m a yet it
is l o c a t e d in the c o n c e r t h a l l in the u n i o n
b u i l d i n g a n d is p r o b a b l y the o n l y c i n e m a
tha t y o u c a n t a k e y o u r b e e r in to s u p o n
w h i l e w a t c h i n g a g o o d f i l m .
A l s o , d o n ' t f o r g e t t o l o o k at the p o s t e r s o n
the w a l k w a y f o r the t i m e s a n d d e t a i l s o f
the s h o w i n g s .
A ho r ro r mov ie by John Carpen te r , d i rector of such
cult f l icks as The T h i n g , V i l l age of the D a m n e d a n d
H a l l o w e e n , shou ld be a n event not to miss. The sad
truth is that his latest f i lm , Vamp i r e s , wili p robab l y
pass by wi thout m u c h a c c l a i m .
The story fo l lows J ack C r o w (James W o o d s ) as leader
of T e a m C r o w ' , a g r o u p of M e r c e n a r y V a m p i r e slay-
ers f u n d e d by the C a t h o l i c C h u r c h . By ' c lean ing out a
nest 1 s o m e w h e r e in M e x i c o - enter over use of a m i g o
a n d pad re - they incur the wrath of a power fu l mas-
ter v a m p i r e n a m e d Va lek w h o dec ima tes the entire
t e a m except C r o w a n d M o n t o y a (Dan ie l B a l dw in ,
ano the r of the Ba ldw in brothers). It is left to them to
prevent Va lek f r om f ind ing the Berziers C r o s s . This
cross w o u l d a l l ow h im a n d al l vampi res to walk by
day, m a k i n g them imposs ib l e to ki l l .
This story is a g o o d i d e a ; it has so m u c h p romise but
is s o m e h o w left a little th in. The m m is s low-paced
a n d de l i be r a t ed . It is s o m e w h e r e be tween a spaghe t-
ti western (over l ong shots of tough m e n in a desert
b a c k g r o u n d ) a n d a h a m m e r hor ro r (latex body parts
a n d plenty of b l ood ) . Still the p roduc t i on qual i t ies are
h i g h , espec ia l l y cons ide r i ng the modes t budge t of
$20 m i l l i on . For a hor ro r it is rarely scary, l eav ing you
firmly roo ted at the back of your seat. This is p r o b a -
bly b e c a u s e you feel little empathy with any of the
charac te rs , part icular ly W o o d s , w h o seems deter-
m i n e d to d o things the hard way.
It w o u l d be unfa i r to say that o n c e the f i lm h a d start-
ed I wasn't interested in the e n d , a n d the c i n e m a t o g -
raphy is certainly g o o d ; but s o m e w h e r e a l o n g the
l ine, it just fai ls to capture the i m a g i n a t i o n . Perhaps
this is b e c a u s e it t reads a n uneasy line be tween trying
to be g r o u n d b reak ing whi le still keep ing to the v a m -
pire ethos. The vamp i r e s may be i m m u n e to ga r l i c but
they still w e a r go th i c even ingwear .
For a Friday night out this f i lm is hardly r e c o m m e n d -
a b l e , but for a c h a n g e f r om the usua l H o l l y w o o d
b l o c k b u s t e r it m a y be worth a l ook .
Ka ther ine a n d D a v e
Th is w e e k the O d e o n K e n s i n g t o n have
benevo l en t l y d o n a t e d five pa i rs of t ickets to
see ' P u s h i n g T in 1 s t a r r i n g J o h n C u s a c k
( G r o s s e Point B lank) a n d Billy B o b T h o r n t o n
( A r m a g e d d o n ) .
Push ing Tin is a c o m e d y a n d d r a m a a b o u t
l i fe , l o ve , a e r o p l a n e s a n d o t h e r b u m p y r ides.
Set in the h igh- tens ion a t m o s p h e r e of the
c h a o t i c a i r traff ic c o n t r o l cent re fo r N e w
York's three m a j o r a i rpor t s this f i lm is a b o u t
terr i tor ia l f ee l i ngs b e t w e e n m e n a n d h o w
they d e a l with t h e m .
A s a lways a l l you have to d o is a n s w e r a s i m -
ply q u e s t i o n , This w e e k the ques t i on is
Who connects Pushing Tin and
Four Weddings And A Funeral?
A n s w e r s o n a virtual p o s t c a r d to
be fo re W e d n e s d a y 3 N o v e m b e r .
The w i n n e r of last w e e k s B la i r W i t c h c o m p e -
tit ion has w o n the fan tas t i ca l l y a m a z i n g B la i r
W i t c h g o o d y b a g , a n d that p e r s o n is
Jennifer Edwards
A n d the runners up w h o a l l go t the ques t i on
r ight, get a pa i r of t ickets to see this mos t ter-
rifying f i l m . They are
S Comber
E Mavrikas
N Balakumaran
C Gamonpilas
J Williams
P lease ca l l by the Felix o f f i ce to co l l e c t your
t ickets.
8 s x
r e a c t © *
S
S
E
Joy Tech Jordan Grand Prix Steering Wheel Carmageddon (PSX)
Viv: It w a s with g rea t a n t i c i p a t i o n that I first l a id my h a n d s o n Joy Tech's
PSX w h e e l . E n d o r s e d by J o r d a n G r a n d Prix I h a d v i s ions of m i m i c k i n g the
D a m o n Hi l l of o l d . . . B o a s t i n g a F l c a r style w h e e l , g e a r c h a n g e a n d built
in fo rce f e e d b a c k this p i e ce o f h a r d w a r e cer ta in ly c o m e s w e l l - e q u i p p e d .
Howeve r , a l l this p r o m i s e t u rn ed to dust w h e n I even tua l l y j u m p e d in the
driver's seat a n d f o u n d that s teer ing was ra ther m o r e d i f f icu l t t han first
h o p e d . A d j u s t i n g sensitivity m a d e little d i f f e r ence , the c a r e i ther wou ldn ' t
turn at a l l o r ins tead went into a n u n c o n t r o l l a b l e swerv ing m o t i o n , e n d i n g
up with a n artistic s p i n . A s f rust ra t ion a n d r o u g h h a n d l i n g i n c r e a s e d , the
fo rce f e e d b a c k v ib ra t i ons b e c a m e ba re l y n o t i c e a b l e . A n o t h e r p r o b l e m
c o m m o n to most w h e e l con t ro l l e r s is that a n a g g r e s s i v e turn w h e n you ' re
trying to bea t a sha rp c o r n e r usua l l y results in y o u r l ift ing the whee l in the
air, - whee l s a re s imply not heavy e n o u g h f o r se r ious d r i v i ng . At the e n d
of the day you've g o t to ask yourse l f whe the r its wor th h a v i n g such a bu lky
a c c e s s o r / - pe r sona l l y I don ' t be l i e ve any of t h e m are wor th the desk
s p a c e .
Ben's View: M y v i ew of the J oy t ech
whee l c a n be s u m m e d up in o n e
w o r d - d i s a p p o i n t i n g . W h i l e the
whee l g ives a m u c h better f e e l i ng
of ac tua l l y d r i v i ng a car, w h a t it
doesn ' t g ive you is any sort of c o n -
trol o v e r the g a m e . I f o u n d mysel f
constant ly w e a v i n g f r o m left to
right a n d s p i n n i n g off the t rack in
every r a c i n g g a m e I p l a y e d . The
w h o l e po in t of a s p e c i a l i s e d dr i v-
ing w h e e l is that it m a k e s it eas i e r
to d r i ve , not harder . If I'd p a i d
m o n e y f o r this t h ing I'd be b a c k at
the s h o p by n o w d e m a n d i n g a
re fund .
Mark's View: It's b i g , b l a c k a n d
l o o k s i m p r e s s i v e (not tha t t h i n g ,
t h e o t h e r t h i n g ) . I'm t a l k i n g
a b o u t t h e J o y t e c h s t e e r i n g
w h e e l . It d o e s l o o k g o o d a n d
o n e w o u l d h a v e t h o u g h t w o u l d
b e the i d e a l a n s w e r to a l l t h o s e
h a r d - t o - c o n t r o l d r i v i n g g a m e s
( G r a n d T o u r i s m o a n y o n e ? ) .
Su r e l y a j o y p a d s h a p e d l ike a
w h e e l is g o i n g to b e the c l o s e s t
w e c o m e to the r e a l t h i n g . It is a
g o o d i d e a but s a d l y the w h e e l is
just a t a d t o o sens i t i v e a n d tu rns
h a r d g a m e s i n t o i m p o s s i b l e
o n e s . A s l ight n u d g e of the w h e e l
d o e s n o t h i n g bu t a n ex t r a m i c r o n
of p r e s s u r e a n d y o u a r e d o i n g
3 6 0 ' s a l l o v e r the s h o p . It t ake s a
bit o f p e r s e v e r a n c e t o maste r .
O n c e m a s t e r e d it is g o o d f u n but
I t h i nk it stil l n e e d s s o m e f ine-
t u n i n g . O n c e this is d o n e I'm
su re it wi l l be a sure- f i re hit . It
wi l l g i v e a h i g h e r p l a y a b i l i t y a n d
p l e a s u r e to a l l r a c i n g g a m e s . 2
o u t o f 5 but w i th t u n i n g a n e a s y
4 o u t of 5.
• • •
Part ia l ly b a n n e d f o r its v i o l e n t
nature , C a r m a g e d d o n is a wi ld r a c-
ing g a m e . Set in the yea r 2 0 2 8 , a
new sport has been b o r n to con t ro l
a ca t as t roph i c a c c i d e n t that t rans-
f o r m e d part of the h u m a n race into
z o m b i e s ( cou ld h a p p e n ) .
There are severa l ways in wh i ch you
c a n p lay this g a m e . Firstly you c a n
treat it as a s t anda rd rac ing g a m e
a n d c o m p l e t e the a l lo t ted a m o u n t
of laps faster t han a n y b o d y e lse .
Th is , however , is du l l a n d s o m e -
th ing you c a n d o with any o ther
dr iv ing g a m e . A l ternat ive ly you c a n
waste any th ing that m o v e s . This
involves m o w i n g d o w n the z o m b i e s
in a gra tu i tous f a s h i o n o r k i ck ing
the out of the o ther cars by
r a m m i n g them to bits but p re fe rab l y
bo th . It's the way that you c a n pe r-
fo rm these ac t ions that m a k e it al l
wor thwh i le t h o u g h . For ins tance ,
r a m p i n g off a 100-s torey b u i l d i n g
wh i le p e r f o r m i n g a tr iple somersau l t
to l and o n a po l i c e c a r sco res h i g h -
ly, as d o e s a h a n d b r a k e turn at 1 0 0
m p h into a g r o u p of z o m b i e s . That
earns you a " c o m b o bonus " . S q u a s h
the d e a d m e n w a l k i n g into a wa i i
fo r a "p i ledr i ver b o n u s " a n d you
might even ea rn a p p l a u s e fo r "artis-
tic i m p r e s s i o n " . There a re a l so lots
of w a c k y power-ups that c a n a id
you in the quest o f c a n i n g you r
o p p o n e n t s , such as the hot r od a n d
o p p o n e n t f r eeze , but there a re o t h -
ers that c a n s o m e w h a t h inder you r
p rog ress , such as jelly su spens i on
a n d l una r gravity. You must not fo r-
get that d u r i n g you r z e a l o u s c a r -
n a g e you r o w n c a r will be gett ing
p u m m e l l e d s o y o u must co l l e c t
credits so y o u c a n repa i r you r c a r in
o r d e r fo r you to con t i nue the r a m -
p a g e .
I l o v ed this g a m e b e c a u s e it was
o r i g i n a l a n d the g a m e p l a y is h ighly
add i c t i v e . The re isn't any a rs ing
a r o u n d with ca re fu l d r i v i n g ; you ' r e
not try ing to w in the g r a n d prix o r
any th ing . It is pure p l easu re , just
l ike b e i n g in a c rocke r y s h o p a n d
b e i n g a b l e to g o comp le t e l y a p e
a n d b e i n g r e w a r d e d fo r you r t r o u -
ble in d o i n g so . Fantast ic .
M a r k
1 s 9
r e a c t © III! . ' |!f! I Hi ' :'; '
R/C Stunt Copter (PSX)
A n a i r b o r n e r a d i o - c o n t r o l l e d v eh i c l e is of ten the
d r e a m present f o r m a n y k ids . Un fo r tuna te l y
h o w e v e r it 's usua l l y on l y the pre ten t ious little r ich
gits that eve r get h o l d of o n e . R/C Stunt C o p t e r
f r om Interplay a l l ow s e ve r yone to s a m p l e the
f l a vou r of f ly ing a r/c he l i cop te r , w i thou t the f ea r
of h a v i n g to fork ou t h u n d r e d s if you c r a sh the
d a m n t h i n g . . .
Stunt C o p t e r was d e s i g n e d to work with the
Playstat ion D u a l S h o c k cont ro l le r , e n a b l i n g the
player to use o n e a n a l o g u e stick fo r d i rec t iona l
ro ta t ion a n d the o ther fo r thrust. If you don ' t have
this con t ro l l e r the left a n d right cont ro l pads o n
the o r i g i n a l j o ypad wil l suff ice. Initially m o v e m e n t
is extremely tricky a n d you' l l f ind yoursel f c o n -
stantly h a v i n g to jugg le y o u r c o n c e n t r a t i o n
be tween a l t i tude , thrust a n d a n g l e as you e d g e
o n w a r d a n d u p w a r d . This c a n be very frustrat ing,
espec ia l l y c o n s i d e r i n g the fact that it's p l a in o b v i -
ous wha t you have to d o , it's just diff icult to exe-
cute the a c t i o n . For o n c e then the t ra in ing levels
are abso lu te l y necessary a n d a n y o n e w h o g o e s
d i v ing in at the d e e p end wil l get a so rd id c o n f i -
d e n c e b a s h i n g . S u p p o s e d l y you s h o u l d be ab l e
to en joy the g a m e m o r e after t r a in ing , hav ing
g a i n e d c o m p e t e n c y in integrat ing al l aspects of
f ly ing wi thout t o o m u c h thought . A fine theory,
but you need to be pat ient e n o u g h to reach that
s tage , a n d I fo r o n e certa inly wasn't. W h e t h e r it
be s l a l o m courses o r b a l l o o n s h o o t i n g , the mis-
s ions themse lves a re highly d i s a p p o i n t i n g a n d
rarely last l o n g e r than a c o u p l e of minutes . Even
the 2-player m o d e is fairly poor , with e a c h p layer
t ak ing their turn to c o m p l e t e the level object ives ,
rather than f ly ing s imul taneous ly . The most fun to
be h a d actua l l y c o m e s w h e n you're wa t ch ing you r
o p p o n e n t , as y o u c a n dr ive t hem m a d by st icking
a w h o p p i n g great h a n d in front of their v iew (wit-
ness screenshot ) .
The y a n k e e c o m m e n t a t o r wi l l a l s o p r o v i d e s o m e
l ight rel ief - that is until he gets a n n o y i n g . G e n -
era l ly s p e a k i n g the s o u n d a n d g r a p h i c s a re quite
g o o d fo r this sort of g a m e a n d the con t ro l is wel l
d e s i g n e d , but these fac tors d o not m a k e up fo r
the repe t i t i ous , d i f f icu l t a n d b o r i n g g a m e p l a y .
Stunt C o p t e r isn't b a d , it just doesn ' t present
e n o u g h to k e e p a l l but a sma l l g r o u p of fana t i cs
interested fo r l o n g .
Viv
LMA manager (PSX)
C o n s o l e s a re not r e n o w n e d fo r c o m p l e x , m a n -
a g e m e n t type g a m e s , but C o d e m a s t e r s ' L A M
m a n a g e r is a ser ious n o n - c o n f o r m e r w h e n it
c o m e s to such s tereotyp ing . At last there is a foo t-
ball m a n a g e m e n t g a m e fo r a c o n s o l e wh i ch c a n
match the very best a v a i l a b l e fo r the P C - a n d
that's wi thout a k e y b o a r d a n d m o u s e .
As with most footy s ims, the p layer c a n be assu red
of up-to-date stats (the current 1 9 9 9 - 2 0 0 0 s e a -
son c o m p l e t e with its real-life fixture list is your
starting point) a n d total con t ro l of their c l ub - if
they wan t it. For the less pat ient g a m e r tasks such
as p layer t ra in ing a n d sponso r sh ip d e a l s c a n be
ass igned to assistant m a n a g e r s wi thout detract ing
too m u c h fun f r om the g a m e . Wa t ch ing your
t e a m in ac t i on is highly enter ta in ing a n d recreates
s o m e of the tens ion you get f r om watch ing your
favour i te c lub o n T V O f cou rse , if the game's not
g o i n g so wel l you c a n al ter t e a m tactics o r br ing
in fresh b l o o d at any t ime dur ing the match . After-
math ma t ch analys is a n d 3 D highl ights a re s im i-
larly excel lent with c o m m e n t a r y f r om Ray Stubbs
a n d the woeful ly g o o d A l a n H a n s e n .
U p g r a d i n g your s tad ium is a fantast ic way to
waste money , espec ia l l y o n a c lub like Br ighton
where the a t tendance rarely rises a b o v e the 5 , 0 0 0
mark . C o a x i n g qual i ty players to your c l ub is a
feat to b e h o l d in the lower d iv is ions , but this is
where you shou ld start as its fa r m o r e satisfying
tak ing a lowly D iv is ion 3 side al l the way to the
top , rather than starting out with a ready-made
premiersh ip member . The youth s q u a d prov ides
a n excel lent p o o l of potent ia l y o u n g stars, a n d if
you are part icular ly s c h e m i n g then you ' l l p romote
t hem al l to the first t e a m a n d f log ' e m off the next
s e a s o n . If the 5 0 year ca ree r m o d e does not
a p p e a l then there are a n u m b e r of cha l l enges to
be tried out, a n d you'l l be ab l e to c o m p a r e your
f inal s core with others over the Internet. Take on
a f la tmate in 2-player m o d e a n d prepare for
s o m e ser ious compet i t i on in the l e ague . (Just for
the record I l anded 13th pos i t ion for Br ighton in
the 1st s ea son whi le my room-mate at ta ined re le-
ga t ion for Torquay. . . h ahaha ! )
L A M manager has been so magni f i cent l y e n g i -
neered a r o u n d the Playstat ion that the myr iad of
opt ions a v a i l a b l e c a n be a c c e s s e d a n d c h a n g e d
with m i n i m u m fuss, us ing a s imp le L/R button
m e n u system. A l l m a n a g e r i a l screens are c lear ly
presented with easy to read text, a n d excel lent
m in i-an imat ions t o o . Deserved ly so , L M A m a n -
a g e r nestled in at the top of Playstat ion sales
charts everywhere . Nuf f s a id .
Viv
m^iJi^ , ^ : t y | | S ;
i l l i S i P ' . •
• • . • • :. :
: " . • '
0 n x
F X V N y
Standing Room
Only
L i v e r p o o l v B r a d f o r d ,
l ive f r o m A n f i e l d .
If L i v e r p o o l w a n t to
be a n y t h i n g less t h a n
a l a u g h i n g s tock this
s e a s o n , t h e y ' d better
w i n . W i t h o r w i thou t
little St M i c h a e l .
8 p m d a V i n c i ' s
Win £50 c a s h or a
c r a t e of lager
8 p m , da Vinci's
XS
C l a s s i c pa r t y t u n e s
f o r the p o s t - m a t c h
party , p l u s c o c k t a i l
b a r a n d c h i l l o u t
r o o m . 9-1 a m , dBs
Standing Room
Only
C h e l s e a v Her tha
Ber l in , 7 p m d a V inc i ' s
l l b l a x a n d c o o l d o w n
w i th the c h e .
5 i y c : ici'IB
Utopia
It's Fr iday nights, it's
cheesy , it 's p r e -
d i c t a b l e , but it's d a m n
g o o d f un .
9 - 2 a m , dBs .
Contact Simon �� n
(sime»n.kahn@ic o c uk)
Archery
Fencing Club
U n i o n G y m , 1 2 p m
Wine Tasting
6 p m , dB ' s
Canoe Club
Pract i ce s e s s i o n , 7 p m
CAG
S o u p run , 8 . 3 0 p m
Shooting Pugwash
Talk f r o m D r J o h n
H a s s a r d , 1 p m , U D H
C&GU
O & M C , 6 p m , C & G
O f f i c e
CAG
S o u p run , 8 . 3 0 p m
W e e k ' s B a s e m e n t
c Stereolab @
Heaven; £ 1 0
G r o o v e a l o n g to the
ever-re l iab le a m b i e n t
popsters .
Remy Zero @
Embassy Rooms; £ 7
| | b d i o h e a d - a p p r o v e d
e m o t i o n a l rock f r o m
p $ e o t h e r s i d e o f the
Super Furry Animals
@ Brixton Academy;
£12.50
T h e f r a z z l e d W e l s h
p o p - m o n g e r s return
with the i r twisty tunes .
Longpigs @ Heaven;
£9
Af te r s h e d d i n g the i r
B r i t p o p s h a c k l e s , this
lot a r e s h o w c a s i n g
Warp 10th Birthday
@ Z Rooms; £10
W a r p Reco rds c o n t i n -
ue the i r c e l e b r a t i o n s ,
w i th A u t e c h r e a n d
S q u a r e p u s h e r .
Film
Pushing Tin
dy w i th John Cusak.
Virgin Fulham Road
3 50, 6.20, 9 00
2.50, 5.40, 8 .30 )
Bowfinger
S o - s o c o m e d y
M a r t i n & Murphy .
UCI Whiteleys
4 . 4 0 , 6 . 4 0 , 9 . 3 0
Virgin Chelsea
3 . 3 0 , 6 . 1 5 , 8 . 4 5
T a r z a n
with Of f- the-sca 'e o f fe r ing
f rom the M o u s e House .
Odeon Leicester Sq
Virgin Chelsea
2 . 3 0 , 4 . 3 0 , 6 . 3 0
Blair Witch Project
It's real ly rather scary
apparent ly . . .
ABC Tottenham Ct Rd
5 . 2 5 , 7 . 4 0 , 9 . 5 5
Odeon Kensington
4 . 5 5 , 7 . 0 5 , 9 .15 )
Virgin Fulham Road
Odeon Kensington
TV Hollywood Greats
1 0 . 4 0 p m , BBC1
The ser ies b e g i n s by
p ro f i l i ng o n e of wes t-
e rn c i n e m a ' s a l l t ime
g rea t s - C a r y G r a n t .
t The Big Match
7 .30pm, ITV
It's c r u n c h t ime f o r
C h e l s e a - w in a n d
they ' r e t h r o u g h , lose
a n d say g o o d b y e .
11 O'clock Show
hones t , I th ink not.
Have I Got News...
9 . 0 0 p m , B B C 2
This year, M e r t o n &
H i s l o p a r e b a c k in
qual i ty " take-no-pr i-
s i o n e r s " m o d e . C l a s s .
s
•99 9 BG Ftwlographer
s just
pjatual H i s to ry M u s o -
Moscow State Circus
T r a d i t i o n a l C i r c u s in
State o f the art B ig
Top .
Fu lha im B r o a d w a y
£6 - <;24
•il Ski and
Snowboard show.
v.sia
Jents
Audacily
Amuss ing Fringe p ro-
duction on the "sludge of
mediocrity.
Barons Court
£5 Cone .
fa
lexindf JV.
Pay what you can Friday
1 n 1
D A Y y I
World Cup Rugby
The Final, live from
the Millennium stadi-
um in Cardiff M y
money's an N e w
Zealand beating
Australia, but whoev-
be a damn entertain-
i ng match Go L o m u
Kung Fu Club
(Wu S h u Kwan)
Sou ths i de G y m
4 : 3 0 p m - 6 : 3 0 p m
Red Hot Chili Peppers
© W e m b l e y ; £18 50
Expensive, but the
Chili's will m a k e even
this v enue seem inti-
East is East
H o w cou ld you possibly
resist anything bi l led as
"A c o m e d y o f fami l ies ,
a ch ip shop , a n d a very
randy d o g " . C h e c k
local press fo r t imes.
Rugby World Cup
2 00pm, ITV
The final, live f r o m
Cardiff,' should see
N e w Zealand thrash-
ing the Aussics
Intimate House
Live art . A c t o r s c r e a t e
a n i n t i m a t e , e r o t i c
s p a c e with th ie r a u d i -
e n c e . O h errrr...
South London Gal lery
£1.50 Cone .
Death In Vegas @
Shepherd's Bush
Empire; £10
C o o l sounds you c a n
hear for free if you win
ou r c o m p o n p. 1 7.
V a m p i r e s
G r i m offering from
Warner West End
Virgin Trocodero
Bremner, Bird
and Fortune
C 4 , 9 p m
W a t c h t h e sa t i r i s t ' s
r ip the piss o u t of
T o n y ' s P e o p l e . N i c e
Romeo e Giulietta
Fresh a n d o r i g i o n a l
a d a p t a t i o n of t h e :
c l a s s i c Love:story.
R iver S ide S tud ios
£1 6 C o n e .
W h a t m o r e d o you
LFF
The London Film Festi-
val gets into gear, with a
multitude of screenings
every day at the N a t i on -
al Film Theatre and the
O d e o n West End.
With eight w e e k s to
go until the millenni-
u m ,
-
schedules and break
out the cash. C o o f .
s
c
p
eh
h
weekly celebration S u n d a y s 3pm & 6pm
i m p e r i a l M e d i c a l C a m p u s ( c h a r i n g C r o s s )
T h e D r e w T h e a t r e , R e y n o l d s B u i I d i n g ,
S t . D u n s t a n s R d , H a m m e r s m i t h , W6
midweek cell s
v
ardent daily prayer s
32 s x
Mountaineering Society
BEN PICKERSGILL
At first t h ou g h t , it al l s e e m s ra ther
m a d : p i l i ng into a m i n i b u s o n a
c o l d Fr iday n ight , b o m b i n g up the
M l for a c o u p l e of hours a n d then
w a n d e r i n g into a f i e l d , at m i d n i g h t ,
with a to rch as y o u r on ly l ight
sou rce in w h i c h to pitch a tent!
O k a y , so it is m a d , but why not?
O h , a n d the r e a s o n fo r th is? To get
two a w e s o m e days , c l i m b i n g the
gr i ts tone c r ags of the Peak Distr ict .
As a relat ive nov i ce to the w o r l d o f
rock c l i m b i n g , I wasn ' t qu i te sure
wha t to expec t , but just the t h o u g h t
of l eav ing L o n d o n for the w e e k e n d
was r e a s o n e n o u g h to g o . W a k i n g
up o n Sa tu rday m o r n i n g to the
s o u n d of whis t l ing b i rds ra ther t han
rush-hour traf f ic , with the c r a g on ly
a few minutes away , I was c o n -
v inced I h a d m a d e the right d e c i -
s i o n !
W i th al l the ban te r f r o m m o r e
e x p e r i e n c e d c l ub m e m b e r s a b o u t
past t r i u m p h s a n d p l ans for the day,
I w o n d e r e d if it w o u l d be poss ib l e
to c l i m b any th ing w i thout l o o k i n g
tota l ly pa thet i c . The skill of these
p e o p l e , however , m e a n s that o n e is
a b l e to d e v e l o p at their o w n p a c e
in a re l axed a n d safe en v i r on m en t .
W e were very lucky as there was no
rain a l l w e e k e n d , with the a d d e d
b o n u s of sun o n Sunday , m a k i n g
those first m o v e s even m o r e en joy-
a b l e !
Return ing to L o n d o n o n S u n d a y
n ight , I felt r e f r e shed , a lbe i t t i red ,
a n d ready to take o n those 9 a m
lectures ! It was cer ta in ly o n e of the
best w e e k e n d s I've h a d in two years
of b e i n g at Imper ia l .
As wel l as these t r ips , wh i ch a re
run every o the r w e e k e n d , the c l ub
visits a L o n d o n c l i m b i n g wa l l every
W e d n e s d a y . This is where I d i d my
first c l i m b , a n d a l t h o u g h o u t d o o r
c l i m b i n g is a di f ferent g a m e to wa l l
c l i m b i n g , it is a n exce l l en t way of
s e e i n g what c l i m b i n g is all a b o u t ,
w i thout the c o m m i t m e n t of a w h o l e
w e e k e n d away. C l i m b i n g wa l l s
a l s o he lp you to i m p r o v e you r t e c h -
n i q u e , w h e t h e r you d e c i d e to g o
Gliding Club
CHRIS SMART
It has b e e n a busy a n d success fu l
s u m m e r for I C G C , a l l- in-a l l . The
new c o m m i t t e e have t a k e n up the i r
posts n o w that a new term has
star ted, but the c a p t a i n c y h a d b e e n
v a c a t e d ear ly by A n d y H o l m e s '
depa r tu r e for p i lot t r a in ing with BA .
I C G C wishes A n d y a l l the best fo r
the future a n d g o o d luck on his
cou r se .
O n o u r o w n s u m m e r c o u r s e
(the first w e e k of the vaca t i on ) a
few hardy i nd i v i dua l s b r a v e d the
p o o r w e a t h e r to get s o m e so l id
t ra in ing in late in June , a n d o v e r
the c o u r s e s u m m e r of the s u m m e r
a lot of g e n e r a l f l y ing was d o n e in
ou r 2-seater, 4 9 6 . It is g o o d to see
it in use out of te rm t i m e . The c u l -
m i n a t i o n of this w a s 2 f irst-solos at
the e n d of s u m m e r fo r H e m r a j
N i t h i a n a n d a r a j a h a n d D u n c a n
Ashley . We l l d o n e guys , a n d k e e p it
up !
W e have s o l d o u r bas i c s ing le
seat g l ider , 2 9 6 to a D u t c h c l u b ,
a n d it is s o o n to be r e p l a c e d with a
h ighe r p e r f o r m a n c e r a c ing gl ider .
This is part of a n o n g o i n g p l an to
keep the c lub ' s e q u i p m e n t up to
date a n d compe t i t i v e fo r those w h o
are at c o m p e t i t i o n s t a n d a r d .
O n the c o m p e t i t i o n f ront , Luke
R e b b e c k t o o k o u r A S W 2 4 , 9 6 , out
to the first W o r l d J u n i o r G l i d i n g
C h a m p i o n s h i p s at Terlet, H o l l a n d .
C a p t a i n C h r i s Smar t a l s o went ou t
to c rew fo r h im . H igh l i gh t s of the
trip i n c l u d e d get t ing stuck in a
F rench traff ic j a m , g l i d e r in tow,
with a n in f l a tab le p last ic c o w no
the roof of the car. N o t at a i i c o n -
s p i c u o u s t h e n ! A l s o we go t the g l i d -
er t ra i l e r f l a shed by a s p e e d c a m -
era o n the way h o m e . G o o d job
the t ra i l e r w a s there , o r they m igh t
have b e e n a b l e to see the n u m b e r
p late a n d work out w h o I w a s ! Luke
f i n i shed 2 5 t h o v e r a l l , a g o o d result
c o n s i d e r i n g he was the younges t
pi lot there . H e f o l l o w e d this up with
a 2 n d p l a c e in the British Jun io rs .
Contact Chris
l l l l i l i^
o u t d o o r s o r not. S o , you feel l ike
h a v i ng a g o ? T h e n just turn up a n d
c o m e a l o n g . W e meet at the c o l -
lege c l i m b i n g wa l l (off the wa lkway ,
next to STA Travel) on W e d n e s d a y s
at 1 p m . A!! you n e e d is yourse l f
(well , a n d a b o u t ten quid! ) By
a b o u t 6 p m we tend to leave the
wa l l a n d h e a d for a p u b s o m e -
w h e r e a r o u n d c o l l e g e f o r a n
e v e n i n g of cha t t i ng a n d r e l axa t i on .
S o , my a d v i c e to a n y o n e gett ing a
bit f ed up with da i l y c o l l e g e l ife: f o r-
get S o u t h s i d e , fo rge t tutor ia l sheets.
Pack y o u r r u cksac k a n d jump in the
m i n i b u s . Be l i eve m e , it's a blast !
Contact Megan
ICU Jazz and Rock presents.
CALAMARI l
P
http://listen.to/calamari
Debut EP " A little More" now available
Catch C A L A M A R I live at :
7/11/99 : The Monarch, Camden
On stage @9.00pm
Bar open until lam
£5/£4 with flyer
Flyers available from Union office
1 s 3
IC Radio
The Back Room Launch Party - FREE BEER -
- T O P Q U A L I T Y DJs -
- C L A S S S O U N D S Y S T E M -
IC Rad io has just invested o v e r
£2000 in o u r cosy venue at the e n d
of Souths ide Bar. You c a n n o w e x p e -
rience cr isp t reb le , s u p e r b mus i c a n d
a t hunde rous bass (courtesy of two
18 inch subwoofe rs ) , thanks to a
b rand new s o u n d system.
To d e m o n s t r a t e just h o w g o o d
the system is, o u r t o p DJs wi l l be
p lay ing a var iety of m u s i c f r o m the
latest u n d e r g r o u n d s o u n d s , t o
t r ance , a n d every th ing in b e t w e e n .
A l s o to ce l eb ra t e the o p e n i n g we
wil l have a 9 0 pint keg of FREE
C a r l s b e r g o n of fer to a l l w h o c o m e
d o w n . The al l-star DJ l ine-up is as
f o l l ow s :
19:00-19:30 - Laur ie (house)
19:30-20:15 - J a m e s Dynes
(trance)
20 :15-21:15-Tom G . & J a m e s
[Back2Back] (trance)
21:15-22:00-Mat t (hard house )
22:00-23:00 - A l i ck Sethi (under-
g r o u n d e lec t ron ica )
22:45-Close - DJ Lethal (d rum &
bass) + M C
:
Thursday , 4 th N o v e m b e r
1 9 : 0 0 - Ba r C l o s e .
:
The B a c k R o o m - at the e n d of
S o u t h s i d e (past the toi lets , f o l l o w
the mus i c ) .
How:
If y o u l ike wha t you hear , we DJ
in the B a c k R o o m EVERY T h u r s d a y
a n d Fr iday n ight f r o m 8 till late . W e
DJ a l l var ie t ies of m u s i c f r o m the
C h e e s i e s t 7 0 s m u s i c a l l the way to
the latest u n d e r g r o u n d t e c h n o a n d
d r u m & bass .
Contact Dave Edwards
The Felix Crossword, by Turnip Henry
Answer to 1154
Across: D e c i m a t e , s c o p e s , g u a c a mo le , a t t i c , s ah ib , s t eps , s to t s , v i a I,el l i pse , ve rd i , i ndus t r i a l i -
sa t ion ,c rypt , t a n t r u m , o r e s , p a r k s , c h e a p , t h i e f , e n a t e , m a c d o n a ! d , a s s i s i , i n d e c e n t .
Down: O r g a s m , d r a k e , c l a s s , m o o r s , t h e seven acts of m a n , c r a b s , p o t p o u r r i , c h i a n t i , c u s h -
i o n s , p i l a u , mi nt ,mi nee p i e , d a y b r e a k s , ref r a i n , s e t s , t ough , spades , s t ews , soc l e , c l o ve , exa l t .
PS. Sorry a b o u t the n a m e c h a n g e s . This o n e s h o u l d stay. But t h en , w h o knows ?
Fo r that matter : w h o c a r e s ? luv Turn ip .
s 1. G l a c i a l h o l l o w has n o
vowels . (3)
4. Ot is and co . like insects. (9)
8. G i r l makes you s low
d o w n . (5)
9. Fire he used to m a k e
cow. (6)
1 1. She rpa b loke has P i cas-
so . (5)
1 2 . L a b i u m ? O h . Ph i l ip ,
Imperial C o l l e g e , has a n
affinity fo r fat. (10)
13 . The Span i sh Aus t ra l i an
utility veh ic le washes out. (5)
14 . G o b a c k w a r d s after
m e d i c a l of f icer p lay ing syn-
thesizer. (4)
1 6.� o r b lock of stone. (7)
1 8.Pub profit is c h e a p . (7)
2 0 . N eg a t i v e p l easure for
f l o o d survivor. (4)
2 3 . Real m a n keeps k i n g -
d o m . (5)
2 5 . D e c e m b e r . In adver t
H e - M a n is mult i- faceted.
(10)
2 7 . The who l e orchestra likes
ice-cream without fruit. (5)
2 8 . C o o k e r f r agmen t has
m a g i c r ing. (6)
2 9 . C a m e r o n exc la ims it
conta ins d i v a l ence . (5)
3 0 . Ministry of D e f e n c e hes-
itates at e ins te in ium: it
restrains. (9)
31 . Turn the barre l over : it
c a n be t igh tened . (3)
n 1. C o i n - o p m a n m a k e s
f r i end . (9)
2. S tone ba l l . (6)
3. C h a r g e d part ic le v o d k a
gets you to H e a v e n . (1 0)
5. M o n t y says " C h i p s ,
s a u s a g e , e g g s , b a c o n ,
s a u s a g e , e g g s . . . " ? (3,4)
6. A l is ta i r l ikes boys a n d
girls: he has a n excuse . (5)
7. M a s t e r is upr ight . (3)
9. C o o l post off ice is huge
a n d has w a r m b l o o d . (5)
1 0 . D ie t ecstacy is the best.
(5)
1 2 . Wet vege tab l e . (4)
1 5 . G r u n t ! A n a g a is huge !
(10)
1 7 . C o m p l i c a t e d integrals
are the most twisted. (9)
1 8 . O v e r heat river. (4)
1 9. C o m m u n i s t in c o m p a n y
has a bel ief system. (5)
21 . O h ! Trev d o e s s o m e r -
sault openly . (5)
2 2 . Lady ' s outfit s o u n d s
hairy. (7)
2 4 . D o g moun ts sheep . (6)
2 6 . E lec t ron ic sheep w a n -
ders a r o u n d at a w a l k i n g
p a c e . (5)
2 8 . O n o m a t o p o e i c stench (3)
4 s x
Bart s outplayed by skillful IC
Football - amazingly long report for minor match
Impe r i a l VI 2
S B L H III
Fo r th is , o u r s e c o n d l e a g u e g a m e
of the s e a s o n , the o m e n s w e r e
b a d : t he kit b r i e f l y f o r g o t t e n ,
w a l k i n g t h r o u g h H y d e Park in the
p o u r i n g r a i n , a s e v e r e p l a y e r
s h o r t a g e , the re w e r e e v e n p r o b -
lems l o c a t i n g o u r c o a c h ! In the
e n d it w a s a p a s t i c c i o o f n e w c o m -
ers , p l a ye r s l o o t e d f r o m the sev-
enths ( chee rs , J am i l ) a n d sixth
t e a m ve t e r ans w h o t o o k the f i e l d
a g a i n s t Bar ts . E ven c a p t a i n M i k e
N i k o l i c h w a s unf i t to p lay , i n s t e a d
t a k i n g the ro l e o f r e f e r e e , thus
r es to r ing e x - c a p t a i n R o b D a v e n -
por t t o s k i p p e r f o r the day .
H is first d e c i s i o n - to k i ck in to
the w i n d d u r i n g the o p e n i n g 4 5
m i n u t e s - r a i s e d a f ew e y e b r o w s
but by the b r e a k he w a s fu l ly v i n -
d i c a t e d , w i th I m p e r i a l c o m i n g in a
g o a l t o the g o o d . Th i s a r r i v e d
a f te r o n e of m a n y IC b r e a k a w a y s
d u r i n g the first ha l f , w i th B o o t h
f ina l l y s l o t t i ng the b a l l h o m e f r o m
a n a r r o w a n g l e . M e a n w h i l e , the
m e d i c s c o n t e s t e d tha t the b a l l h a d
a l r e a d y run ou t of play . In fac t ,
w i th a c o u p l e o f g o a l s o n the
o p e n i n g d a y a n d a hat-tr ick in a
m i d w e e k f r i end l y , J a m e s is a l r e a d y
f i l l i ng the v o i d left by the d e p a r -
ture o f U L U L e a g u e G o l d e n B o o t
w i n n e r T o m W i l s o n t o the f i f ths.
The m e d i c s t h e m s e l v e s m a d e
little use of the w i n d y c o n d i t i o n s
d u r i n g the o p e n i n g p e r i o d , every
u n i m a g i n a t i v e t h r o u g h b a l l b e i n g
e i t he r d e a l t w i th wi th c o n s u m m a t e
e a s e by n e w c e n t r e - b a c k p a i r i n g
D e n B r a b e r a n d H e a d , o r e lse
s k i d d i n g off the wet turf in to the
g r a t e f u l a r m s o f k e e p e r A n d y
P e a s e , w h o d i d n ' t miss a t h i n g a l l
day .
W i t h the s e c o n d p e r i o d ha rd l y
s t a r t ed , any t h o u g h t s o f a n S B L H
o n s l a u g h t w e r e l a i d f i rmly to rest
as m i d f i e l d p l a y m a k e r D a n W i l s o n
f o l l o w e d u p a s t r ing o f a t t empts in
the Bar ts a r e a to fire h o m e the
l o o s e b a l l : t w o - n i l . D e s p i t e p lenty
of t i m e to d r a w l e v e l , the m e d i c s
w e r e n e v e r in the g a m e pas t th is
p o i n t , w i t h R o b s t a m p i n g o u t
eve r y th i ng in m i d f i e l d .
T o w a r d s the e n d o n e of the
f rus t r a t ed S B L H p l aye r s r e so r t e d to
s o m e s t a m p i n g of his o w n , t h o u g h
of a d i f f e ren t k i n d , a n d w a s du l y
w a r n e d of his c o n d u c t by the ref-
e r e e , w h o h a d a c o m p e t e n t g a m e
a l l r o u n d . E v e n w h e n Ba r t s
s c r a p p e d the i r f ive m a n m i d f i e l d
a n d rever ted to 4-4-2 it w a s n o
use , w i th the i r a t t a ck p r o v i n g just
as i m p o t e n t as b e f o r e . I m p e r i a l
l o o k e d d a n g e r o u s o n the c o u n t e r
t h r o u g h o u t the ha l f , w i th Lu is
Q u a r a n t a o n the le f t-wing r u n n i n g
the o p p o s i t i o n a merry d a n c e ,
wh i l s t D a n M y a t t a n d J a m e s d i d
l i kew i se up f ron t . D o u g H i n e s u p -
p l i e d a s t r ing of qua l i t y c r o s s e s
f r o m the r ight a n d it is true to say
that the v i c to ry w o u l d h a v e b e e n
f a r m o r e c o m p r e h e n s i v e h a d it
not b e e n f o r the h e r o i c s o f the
o p p o s i t i o n n o . 1.
S o , a g r e a t t e a m p e r f o r m a n c e
b u r i e d the g h o s t of a f ew m o n t h s
a g o . A f t e r a s e c o n d ha l f d o w n -
pour , a r a i n b o w g r e e t e d the f i n a l
wh i s t l e , h o p e f u l l y h e r a l d i n g a n e w
d a w n f o r the sixth t e a m a f te r the
d o u r p e r f o r m a n c e s so far. A t the
very least , w e t a k e f r o m the g a m e
o u r first th ree po in t s o f the l e a g u e
s e a s o n a n d a l a r g e b o u t o f c o n -
t en tmen t .
Football 4ths
G K T IV
IC IV 2
A n o t h e r m a t c h day , a n o t h e r r a n -
d o m t e a m wi th o d d s a n d ends
he re a n d the re - w e s h o u l d rea l l y
h a ve t h r a s h e d this t e a m s ince
they a re a d i v i s i o n b e l o w us, but
yet a n o t h e r g a m e o f m i s s e d
c h a n c e s a n d d u b i o u s m i d f i e l d
p lay r esu l t ed in o n l y t w o g o a l s .
T h e first c a m e in the first ha l f wi th
J a v i e r h a v i n g a s p e c u l a t i v e shot
at the a w f u l G K T g o a l k e e p e r w h o
let it c r e e p pas t h i m into the net.
T h e s e c o n d c a m e f r o m a g o o d
m o v e ea r l y in the first ha l f wi th
B o l a p l a y i n g it o u t w i d e to N i m a
w h o w h i p p e d a l ow c ross into the
b o x that w a s n i ce l y s lo t ted in by
Knut f o r his s e c o n d g o a l of the
s e a s o n .
W e d e s p e r a t e l y m i s s e d C a p -
ta in A i d a n B a n k s up f ront with his
k i l l e r ins t inct a n d g r e a t f i n i s h i n g ,
c h a n c e a f te r c h a n c e went b e g -
g i n g but n o t h i n g w a s c o m i n g
a l t h o u g h the f o r w a r d s , M a x a n d
J a v i , r an the i r hear ts o u t a n d L a u -
rie in the s e c o n d ha l f h a d a few
g o o d t o u c h e s . Pey rouz hit the
pos t w i th a g r e a t sho t a n d h a d a
f ew g o o d trys at g o a ! at o the r
t imes but h a d to c o m e off at half-
t im e d u e t o a d o d g y a n k l e .
Shotguns at dawn
Rifle Shooting
At 9 . 0 0 a m the d r e g s of s o c i e t y
g a t h e r e d at the S p o r t s c e n t r e , yes
the R P C w a s g o i n g o n a s h o t g u n
t r ip . By 1 0 the d r e g s m o v e d to the
m i n i b u s a n d a fa i r l y u n e v e n t f u l
j o u r n e y t o J J 's S h o t g u n a r a m a
E m p o r i u m e n s u e d .
O n a r r i v a l a n d a f te r s e v e r a l
c u p s of t e a a n d s u i t a b l e a p p r e c i -
a t i o n of the K i n g C h a r l e s p u p p i e s
we g o t o n w i th the t ask o f s h o o t -
i n g . E a c h o f the f o u r g r o u p s p e r -
f o r m e d w e l l w i th little d r a m a -
s h o o t i n g v a r i e d b e t w e e n e x c e l l e n t
a n d e n t h u s i a s t i c . G u y p e r f o r m e d
w e l l , w i n n i n g the m e n ' s t r o p h y
wi th a s o l i d 3 4 , wh i l s t R a c h e l t o o k
h o m e the l a d i e s t r ophy . A n d the
w o o d e n s p o o n w a s jo int ly s h a r e d
b e t w e e n J a k e a n d A d e l i n e w h o s e
s h o o t i n g c o u l d o n l y b e d e s c r i b e d
as a g r e a t s t e a m i n g p i l e o f e n t h u -
siasm.
O n c e the s h o o t i n g t h i n g h a d
b e e n d o n e w e g o t o n w i th the rest
o f the day , a n d the c l u b d i v i d e d
b e t w e e n the d r u n k s a n d the s h o p -
p e r s . " S e v e r a l h o u r s / b a r g a i n s /
p in ts l a te r we b e g a n to w e n d o u r
m e r r y w a y h o m e . T h e s t ra ins o f
" S t a y i n ' A l i v e " a n d Rol f H a r r i s
a n d the a c c o m p a n y i n g d a n c e
c h o r e o g r a p h y e n t e r t a i n e d the
t ra f f i c a l l the way.
W e c o n g r a t u l a t e D a v e Tu rne r
f o r s n a p p i n g his g u n , M a r k C a r t e r
f o r o n c e a g a i n ge t t i ng his f a c e in
the way , a n d B e n , o u r d r i ve r , f o r
his m a n y k i n d to i l e t s t o p s .
If y o u ' d i ike to c o m e a l o n g
a n d try s h o t g u n s , s h o p p i n g , r i f les ,
a r c h e r y o r a i r g u n s c o m e d o w n t o
the S p o r t s C e n t r e in P r inces G a r -
d e n s a n d l o c a t e the P ro j e c t i l e
Join up for ICU's newest club - Military Coup Soc
H a l l , w h e r e y o u ' l l f i nd a f r i e n d l y
b a n d of r e s p o n s i b l e p e o p l e w h o
wi l l s h o w y o u h o w to jo in u p .
T h e Rif le a n d P isto l C l u b .
1 t 5
Surprise-disco boys win Seconds flatten Bart's Hockey - Disco Squad Men's Rugby
IC III
U C L
O v e r m a n y y e a r s o f g l o r i o u s
h o c k e y IC h a d n e v e r b e a t e n U C L
- u n t i l t o d a y tha t is . U n d e r the
i n s p i r e d l e a d e r s h i p o f s t a n d in
C a p t a i n C a s a n o v a , T h e D i s c o
Boys s t r o l l e d o u t o n t o the f i e l d o f
d r e a m s a n d g a v e the U C L R a b b l e
a g o o d w h i p p i n g .
T h e m i g h t y s u n m e d a l l i o n
w a s s h i n n i n g f r o m t h e o f f a n d a
g o a l a l w a y s l o o k e d i n e v i t a b l e .
A f t e r s o m e s e r i o u s n o c t u r n a l
act iv i ty at the w e e k e n d the S u n -
d a n c e K i d w a s s u r p r i s i n g l y a c t i v e
a n d w e a v e d s o m e m a g i c a r o u n d
the d e f e n c e . W h i l e U C L s t o o d
m e s m e r i s e d by S u n d a n c e ' s River-
d a n c e style f o o t w o r k , H a e m o r -
r h o i d s s l i p p e d a craf ty o n e pas t
the k e e p e r .
W h e r e o n e h a d l e d m o r e
w o u l d su re l y f o l l o w . H a v i n g p o l -
i s h e d o u r s h o r t c o r n e r in a n
i n t e n s i v e t r a i n i n g s e s s i o n , F i l t rum
m a n a g e d t o s c r a m b l e o n e i n .
W i t h F i l t rum g i v i n g a g o o d
s e r v i c i n g t o a n y o n e , w h o w a n t e d
it, J e sus s l o t t ed in a b e a u t y f r o m
the t o p of the D. A f t e r i nv i t i ng
h i m s e l f a l o n g Twat d e m o n s t r a t e d
a l l h is sk i l l by s c o r i n g f r o m 2
i n c h e s .
T h e s e c o n d ha l f w a s a d m i t -
ted l y c r a p w i th n e i t h e r t e a m s c o r -
i n g , bu t w e ' r e 2 9 g o a l s u p f r o m 3
B U S A g a m e s . N i c e !
ICI I
St Bart 's
7 4
.. 0
Desp i t e p l a y i ng wha t was poss ib l y
o u r worst g a m e in three yea rs , we
none the less des t royed a n o t h e r set
of m e d i c s . W i th a s ide that cons i s t-
e d of only six of last w e e k ' s s tar t ing
l ine up we started with a f resh , if
i n e x p e r i e n c e d l ine up . As the s e c -
o n d s start, it s o o n b e c a m e c l e a r
that even the new s e c o n d s s ide
c o u l d kick s o m e arse e ven w h e n
they were p l ay ing wel l b e l o w par.
The first try c a m e s o o n af ter the
whist le with a p e r i o d of p lay that
the a l l -b lacks w o u l d have b e e n
p r o u d of, be ing conve r t ed by J im
S o p p e r u n d e r the posts. M o r e
tries c a m e eventua l ly with the s e c -
o n d s b e i n g a b o u t 3 5 - 0 up at half
t ime .
A f t e r a roya l roas t ing the s e c -
o n d s d i d not i m p r o v e but still m a n -
a g i n g to put m a n y tries d o w n u n d e r
the posts . In the e n d , the s co re d i d
not rea l ly s h o w the d o m i n a n c e of
s e c o n d s with a s co r e l i n e 1 5 0 - 0
b e i n g m u c h m o r e representa t i ve .
A t the e n d , m a n of m a t c h N i c k
Parker e n d e d with 3 tries a n d a
tota l o f 2 9 po in t s . Tries a l s o c a m e
f r o m G l T i m D e n y e r with 3, freshers
c a p t a i n T i m C o l l i n s with 2 a n d a try
e a c h f r o m J im S o p p e r , Jeff M a c e ,
U g o , a n d J an S t e p h e n s o n .
How ev e r , w e k n o w w h e n the
h a r d t e a m s start p l a y i n g us in B U S A
we wi l l n e e d to i m p r o v e by 4 0 0 %
C o m e o n the s e c o n d s .
IN BRIEF ICSM Hockey Netball
I C S M I .
R U M S I
This f a t i g u i n g m a t c h e n d e d bo th
o n e g o a l a p i e c e , a n d o n e d i s l o -
ca t ed s h o u l d e r a p i e c e at Pad . Rec.
The skill s h o w n by both s ides w a s of
a surpr is ing ear ly s e a s o n qual i ty,
but the f in ish ing was at t imes w o e -
fu l , cu lm ina t i ng in a missed penal ty
flick by R U M S in the 65 t h minute .
I C S M s c o r e d first t h r o u g h a
c lass ic p o a c h e r ' s strike f r o m Jez
Boyle , after a short c o r n e r b r e a k -
d o w n , a n d then was ted a series o f
g o o d oppor tun i t i es to kill off the
g a m e . After the restart the R U M S '
centre mid f i e ld b e g a n to take a n
o m i n o u s s t r ang l eho ld o n the mid-
f ie ld , until fortuitously f o r I C S M he
d i s l oca ted his shou lde r , f o u l i n g in
cent re f ie ld . N o t to be o u t d o n e ,
N i c k Keysel l went a n d p o p p e d his
s h o u l d e r out a t tempt ing a power fu l
c l e a r a n c e , a n d in the e n s u i n g c o n -
f u s i o n N i c k ' s o p p o s i t e n u m b e r
s c o r e d with I C S M still in tac t i ca l
d i sa r ray . A t ense 1 5 m i n u t e s
r e m a i n e d as both s ides a t t empted
to spurn as m a n y c h a n c e s as p o s -
s ib le , a n d w h e n the f ina l whist le
b l ew bo th t e a m s left to l ick their
w o u n d s a n d r ebuke themse l ves fo r
their o w n waste fu lness in front of
g o a l .
IC I 1 7
St G e o r g e ' s 1 7
This w a s (yet aga in ) a ser ious ly
c l o s e m a t c h .
T ight m a r k i n g f r o m S t . G e o r g e ' s
d e f e n c e (and s o m e d u b i o u s eye
s h a d i n g u n d e r the p r e t e n c e of
mark ing ) m e a n t that the IC g o a l
f l ow was r e d u c e d to a few o u t s t a n d -
ing shots f r om R e b e k a h a n d S a r a in
the first half. Pau la " the r o a d r u n n e r "
d i d he r th i ng , f e e d i n g the bal l in
a n d a r o u n d the c i rc le to set up the
shoo te r s , a n d a f i red up Kirstie kept
the St G e o r g e ' s W A wel l u n d e r c o n -
tro l . At half t ime , the s co re was 9-9 .
A few substitut ions later a n d
with Becky, the u m p i r e , mutter ing
" h o w d o e s this pen w o r k ? " the s e c -
o n d half got unde rway to a fu r ious
p a c e . Jess a n d J a n e z o o m e d
a r o u n d the court , a n d the de fens i ve
c o m b i n a t i o n of A lex ( occas iona l l y
l o o k i n g rather surpr i sed w h e n the
ba l l b o u n c e d in front of her) a n d
Kathryn in the IC c i r c le , kept us in
con ten t i on . Th ings were l o o k i n g up
with 1 3 m i n s to g o w h e n the St.
G e o r g e ' s centre twisted her ank l e
a n d the i ce p a c k s were b r o k e n
o p e n . A s St G e o r g e ' s h a d n o s u b -
stitutes, w e t o o k the oppor tun i t y to
try a n d bury her u n d e r a pi le o f
coa ts u n d e r the pretext of keep in g
he r w a r m , thus r e d u c i n g the i r t e a m
to 6 p l a ye r s . U n f o r t u n a t e l y her
team-mates d i d not forget a b o u t
her, a n d her injury w a s not ser ious
so she was a b l e to p lay o n . In the
dy ing m o m e n t s of the g a m e , two
quick-f ire g o a l s s aw IC d r a w level
a n d c l a i m a we l l -dese r ved draw.
W e l l p l a y e d e v e r y o n e ! N e x t t ime
we W I N !
Men's Football (5ths)
K i n g s V 3
IC V 4
A f t e r a p o o r p e r f o r m a n c e in the
l e a g u e o n Sa tu rday , l o s i n g 2-0 to
LSE VI , we n e e d e d a b o o s t in this
g a m e a g a i n s t a t e a m f r o m the
d i v i s i o n a b o v e to k i ck start o u r
l e a g u e c a m p a i g n . O n c e the
o p p o s i t i o n h a d m a n a g e d to f i nd
the i r o w n g r o u n d , a n d s o r t e d ou t
w h i c h o n e of t h e m w a s c a p t a i n ,
the g a m e g o t u n d e r w a y , with K i n g s
l o o k i n g l ike a b u n c h of thugs w h o
m i g h t k n o w h o w to p l a y f o o t b a l l .
W e s t a r t ed b a d l y , c o n c e d i n g
a g o a l e a r l y o n , w h e n t h e i r s t r i ke r
(the c o c k i e s t b a s t a r d e v e r k n o w n )
c o l l e c t e d the ba l l a n d sent a l o w
sho t i n to the c o r n e r . K i n g s l o o k e d
l ike a t e a m w h o e x p e c t e d t o w i n
1 0-0 wi th e a s e . But IC V n e v e r l ie
d o w n (except in the b a r at the e n d
o f the night) a n d w e c a m e s t o r m -
i n g b a c k wi th a g r e a t f i n i sh f r o m
Si " M a h a t m a " G a n d y . W e w e r e
n o w p l a y i n g s o m e g r e a t f o o t b a l l ,
w i th e v e n W i l l " G O D " (or is tha t
" D O G " ) D o w b o r ge t t i ng in to the
g a m e . T h e s e c o n d g o a l c a m e
a f te r t he i r k e e p e r f u m b l e d a s a v e ,
r ea l l y p i s s i n g the c o c k y gits off.
But o u r f o o t b a l l w a s s a d l y Kee-
g e n - e s q a n d they m a n a g e d to
f l u k e a g o a l b a c k t o m a k e it 2-2
at ha l f t i m e .
A f t e r the b r e a k , the s e c o n d
h a l f s t a r t e d . Th i s w a s h a n d y , as it
a l l o w e d o u r r e s i d e n t d i n o s a u r to
c o m p l e t e h is ha t t r i ck wi th a n e a t
b a c k h e a d e r in to the t o p c o r n e r ,
a n d a n o t h e r f i ne f i n i s h a f t e r a
g r e a t m o v e d o w n the left. K i n g s
late c o n s o l a t i o n m a d e it 4-3 at
the e n d , but they k n e w they w e r e
w e l l b e a t e n , e v e n a s k i n g the ref to
ca l l a halt early. . . C o m e o n K ings ,
t ake it, t ake it!
6 t x
Football firsts double up QMW Men's Football
Q M W I 2 c o r n e r f r o m W a r r e n w a s s m a s h e d O n a w i n d y S a t u r d a y i C f a c e d a
IC I 3 i n t o t h e net f r o m t h e h e a d o f o n - s t rong Q M W s q u a d .
( BUSA) f o r m F o u l s t o n e . Q M W e q u a l i s e d W e f a c e d the w i n d in the first
W e d n e s d a y s a w the return o f the a g a i n w h e n a p a r r i e d s h o t fe l l to hal f a n d , as e x p e c t e d , w e r e u n d e r
firsts to C h i s l e h u r s t , a p l a c e w e the fee t o f the i r g r a t e f u l s t r i ke r the c o s h . But, the three at the
are g r o w i n g to l o v e ! w h o m a d e n o m i s t a k e . Q M W b a c k of C h r i s , J a m i e a n d par t i cu-
F r o m the k i ck-o f f , n o q u a r t e r w a s t e d a f e w g o l d e n o p p o r t u n i - lar ly D a v e kept ou t the threa t ,
w a s g i v e n in a n y a r e a o f the t ies a n d they w e r e m a d e to pay In the s e c o n d ha l f it w a s a dif-
p i t c h . M i d - w a y t h r o u g h the f i rst w h e n Dirty W a r r e n f o u n d his scor ing ferent story, we l o o k e d t h r e a t e n i n g
ha l f a m e s m e r i s i n g r un f r o m m i d - boots : Latching o n to a h e a d e r f rom every t im e we h a d the ba l l a n d ,
f i e l d by S teve w a s r e w a r d e d w h e n A lex , War ren ' s exquisite lob left the a f t e r W a r r e n s p u r n e d a f e w
he w a s b r o u g h t d o w n in t h e b o x : Q M W keepe r s t randed . c h a n c e s , a n d J a m i e h a d his
Penal ty . U p s t e p p e d F o u l s t o n e Impressive debu t pe r fo rmances pena l t y s a v e d by the Q M W keep-
w h o s l o t t e d the s p o t k i ck c o o l l y f rom Al ista ir a n d D a i , contr ibuted to er, we t o o k the l e a d t h a n k s to a
into the b o t t o m c o r n e r . ano the r we l l-pol ished display f r om F o u l s t o n e f ree-k ick (c rap keepe r ) .
T h e s e c o n d h a l f s a w Q M W the firsts. S c o u s e s a v e d us n e a r t he
hit b a c k w h e n the IC d e f e n c e w a s d e a t h a n d the m i d f i e l d of S teve ,
f i n a l l y b r e a c h e d . U n d e t e r r e d , IC Q M W I 0 J u a n , D a n , Ph i l a n d c a p t a i n
d u g in a n d e a r n e d a w e l l - I C I 1 c o u r a g e o u s R i ch h e l d ou t f o r a
d e s e r v e d s e c o n d g o a l w h e n a (ULU League ) w e l l - d e s e r v e d v ictory.
Opposition rolled over by IC virgins Ladies Rugby
IC V i rg i n s 2 0 IC V i rg i n s 3 4 the s c rums out , a n d started r u ck i ng
K ing ' s 5 G K T 5 a n d m a u l i n g p roper l y . A f te r a l o n g
(Wed 27th ) (Sat 23 rd ) p e r i o d of t ight d e f e n c e by G K T ,
A l t h o u g h it w a s a h a r d g a m e w e H a v i n g lost a l a rge n u m b e r of 1st a n d m a n y s c r u m s , Betsy b r o k e
t r i u m p h e d a n d k i c k e d K i n g ' s c h o i c e p layers we went into the t h r o u g h to s c o r e a try.
A r s e ! T h e start w a s g r u l i n g bu t m a t c h with a little t r e p i d a t i o n , as The s e c o n d ha l f s ta r ted wi th
w e kep t it in t h e i r h a l f a n d R o m y we bea t G K T in a h a r d f o u g h t f ina l e v en m o r e p ressu re f r o m G K T , but
b r o k e t h r o u g h to s c o r e h e r f irst o f last year. a we l l p l a c e d h i g h k ick f r o m Romy,
4 t r i es ! It c a n no t be d e n i e d tha t N o n e the less we f o u g h t the c h a s e d by Betsy, r esu l t ed in a run-
K i n g ' s d i d ge t a try bu t they ra in a n d a s l ippery b a l l , a n d h a d a a w a y try.
w o r k e d h a r d a n d it w a s t h e i r f irst p r o m i s i n g start. A n ear ly try f r o m U n f o r t u n a t e l y , o u r l ine outs
a n d l as t , s o a f t e r w e s c o r e d o u r C a r i a n n e set o u r spirits h i g h a n d we re n e v e r up to s t a n d a r d . They
th i rd try w e f o r g a v e t h e m . T h e d e m o r a l i s e d the a l r e a d y w e a r y s t o l e o u r b a l ! a n d c r a s h e d
s c r u m s w e r e nas ty w i th us o f t e n G K T . Romy c o n v e r t e d to leave us t h r o u g h , put t ing the b a c k s o n t o
l o o s i n g g r o u n d but C a d g y s to l e f ee l i ng very con f i den t . the w r o n g f o o t , a n d they s c o r e d ,
m o s t o f t h e i r s c r u m s , a n d w e F r o m the re-start w e were b a c k H o w e v e r , a q u i c k start f r o m Romy
m a d e u p g r o u n d in t h e r u c k s a n d into the i r 2 2 . T h e pressure eventu- w a s c h a s e d d o w n a n d q u i c k han-
m a u l s , p l u s s o m e e x c e l l e n t al ly t o ld o n t h e m a n d exce l lent d l i n g a l l o w e d C a r r i a n e to s c o r e
spr in t s by the b a c k s . T h i s m a y be h a n d s f r o m the b a c k s a l l o w e d A l i B a g a i n .
d u e t o J o w i th h e r w a r cry a n d to put a l ! those pizzas to g o o d use The pressure m o u n t e d still fur-
v i s c o u s w a y s s c a r i n g o f f t h e a n d p o w e r o v e r for a 2 n d try. ther, but with c l e ve r w o r k f r o m the
K i n g ' s p l a y e r s . It w a s a h a r d Fo r the rest of the half , th ings f o r w a r d s , A l i B m a n a g e d to s c o r e
g a m e , bu t the t e a m p u l l e d it t i gh t ened up a n d a h a r d f ight fo l- u n d e r the pos ts , t a k i n g a d v a n t a g e
t o g e t h e r a n d w e w o n ! l o w e d . F ina l ly the fo rwards sor ted of the o v e r l a p . Romy c o n v e r t e d .
S C O R E B O A R D
H O C K E Y
I C S M 1 1 -1 R U M S 1
IC III 4 - 0 U C L
F O O T B A L L
IC 1 3 - 2 Q M W 1
IC IV 2 - 0 G K T
IC V 4 - 3 K ings 3
IC VI 2 - 0 S B L H III
R U G B Y
IC 1 4 3 0 S B L H 1
IC II 7 4 - 0 S B L H II
IC V i rg i n s 2 0 5 K ings
B A D M I N T O N
IC 1 6 - 3 Q M W
IC W o m e n 0 - 9 Kings
B A S K E T B A L L
IC M e n 5 0 - 71 G K T
IC W o m e n 5 4 - 2 4 G K T
N E T B A L L
IC I 1 4 - 1 4 St G e o r g e s
S Q U A S H
IC II 2 - 3 K C L
Sports reports.
Wednesday evening.
Anytime.
A n d n o w s o m e en te r ta in ing
whi te s p a c e :
think that dese rves a n e n c o r e
N i c e .