how life works andrew matthews
TRANSCRIPT
HowLife
Works
writtenandillustratedbyAndrewMatthews
SeashellPublishersAUSTRALIA
HowLifeWorksCopyright©2014byAndrewMatthewsandSeashellPublishers
Publishedby:SeashellPublishers,POBox325,TrinityBeach,Queensland,Australia,4879
Email:[email protected]:www.seashell.com.auFacebook:AndrewMatthewsAuthor
ISBN978-0-9872057-8-0
FirstpublishedMay2014
Nopartofthispublication,textorillustrations,maybereproducedinanyformorbyanymeans,electronic,mechanical,photocopying,recordingorotherwisewithoutthepriorconsentoftheauthorandthepublisher.
Alsobythesameauthor:“BeingHappy!”“MakingFriends”“FollowYourHeart”“HappinessInaNutshell”“BeingaHappyTeen”“HappinessNow”“HappinessinHardTimes”“StoptheBullying!”
DEDICATED
ToJockandAngus
THANKYOU
ToJulie,mywifeandpublisher
Youareamazing.
Thankyouforyourloveandguidance.
Thankyouforallyouhavedoneovertwentyyearstotakeourbookstotheworld.Nobodyknowshowhardyouhaveworkedorthesacrificesyouhavemade.
Iaminaweofyourvision,yourcourage,yourpersistenceandyourgenerosity.Iamblesseddailybyyourbeautifulspirit.
ToIanWard
Thankyouforpublishingmyfirstbook,BeingHappy!Whennootherpublisherwantedmyrawmanuscript,youandNormagavemethechanceofalifetime.Iamsogratefultoyouforyourforesight,yourgenerosityandyourrelentlesscommitment.Youchangedmylife.
ToCarolineDey
Thankyouforyourinterestinthisbookfromthebeginning–andforyourmanyhelpfulsuggestions.Thankyouforbeingmyfriendforthirtyyearsandforalwaysmakingmelaugh.
ToDrGeorgeBlair-West
Foryourfriendship,fortheall-nightchatsonyoursailboat,forourcountlesssessionsonSkypeandyourgoodadvice–thankyou,buddy!
ToJuergenSchmidtThankyouforsharingyourwisdom–andthankyouforyourencouragement.
Contents1.WhenBadThingsHappen
2.WhatControlsYourLife
3.WhyDotheSameThingsKeepHappeningtoMe?
4.HowWeSeeOurselves
5.WhatIsaThought?
6.YouGetWhatYouFeel
7.TheLawofAttraction
8.WhentheLawofAttractionFails
9.Imagine!
10.TheWorldIsYourMirror
11.HowimportantIsAction?
12.Resistance
13.LetGo!
14.WhenEverythingIsGoingWrong
15.Acceptance
16.Forgiveness
17.YourMiraculousBody
18.YourHeart
19.WeAreAllConnected
20.Inspiration
21.ABetterWaytoAchieveGoals
22.ASketchofHowLifeWorks
23.BeGrateful
24.LivingintheNow
25.LoveYourself
26.“WhyAmIHere?”
Books
AboutAndrewMatthews
References
1.WhenBadThingsHappenLateonenightTrentwascruisingdownthehighwaywhenastraycowdecidedtocrosstheroad.Trentswervedbuthitthecowhead-on.Hiscarrolled.Thecowdied.
Trentsurvived.Trentfixedhiscar.Buthistroublesweren’tover...
Trentneededtorelax.Hewentfishingandcuthisfootonarock.Itwasasmallcutbutitwouldn’theal.Tobesafe,Trentsawadoctor.Thedocsaid,“Forgetit!Itisonlyaninflamedtendon.”Butwhenhisrightfootbecamethesizeofawatermelon,Trentsoughtasecondopinion.Thesurgeontoldhim,“Youhaveamassiveinfection.Youmightloseyourleg.”
Trentspentthenexttendaysinhospital.Theysavedhisleg.
Backatwork,Trentwasdrivingdownacountryroadandroundedacornertodiscoveranout-of-controlToyotaCorollaonthewrongsideoftheroadcomingstraightathim.Trenthitthebrakes–andtheCorolla.
Trentsurvived,buthistroublesweren’tover…
Trenthadgottensomefinancialadvice.HeinvestedallhismoneywithacompanycalledStormFinancial.Everythingwasperfect–untiltheGlobalFinancialCrisis,whenStormFinancialhittheperfectstorm.Trentsurvived,butStormFinancialdidn’t.
Trentlosthislifesavings.
Trent’sstoryisyourstoryandmystory.Whydobillsandbaddriverscomeinbunches?
Dowehavecontroloverseeminglyrandomevents,orislifealotteryofstraycowsandrampantbacteria?We’llgettothisshortly…
WhenGoodThingsHappen
Janeisthirtyishandsingle.Allhergirlfriendshaveboyfriendsorhusbands.Janewantedone,too.Shewondered,“Whatiswrongwithme?”
Findingamanbecameherobsession.Whenevershewalkedintoasupermarketoranelevatororontoaplane,shewouldaskherself,“Willhebehere?”
Heneverwas.
Whenevershedidhaveadate,itevaporated.Theguygotpneumoniaandcancelled.Theguy’sItaliangrandmotherhadaheartattackandheleftthecountry.Janetriedinternetdatingandhatedit.Finally,shehadhadenough.Shetoldherself,“Idon’tneedaman.I’lldosomestudy.I’llgetadog!”
ShejoinedanonlineChineselanguageclass.Shereconnectedwitholdgirlfriends.Shewenttothetheatre.Shestartedenjoyinglife.Sheboughtapuppy.
Andyoucanguesstherest.Thedaysheditchedtheideaofaboyfriend,menbeganshowingupbythetruckload.
AhandsomeneighbourrescuedherpuppyfromthestairwellandtookheroutforcoffeeAfriendfromhighschool–completewiththe“I’mjustdivorcedandyouaretheonlygirlIeverloved”routine–trackedherdownonFacebookHerlandlord’sbrothercametochangealightbulbandstayedforbreakfast.
Shewasn’tlooking;shewasn’teventrying.Sheneverspentoneminuteinaseedybar.Itjusthappened.
Whyisitthatwhengoodthingshappen,moregoodthingshappen?
IsItaCoincidence?
Doesthiseverhappentoyou?
Youareabouttophonesomeoneyouhaven’tcalledinamonthwhensuddenlyshecallsyouYouhearaboutaninterestingbookanddecideyouwanttoreadit.Nextdayyouwalkintoafriend’shouse,orajunkshop,oryoustepontoatrain,andthereitisYoustarthumminganoldsong–andthenturnontheradio,andit’splaying.
Orthis?
Youareoutonadate,andyouhavethethought,“Iwouldreallyhatetomeetmyex-husband!”Youwalkintotherestaurant,andthereheiswithhisnewfiancéeYoubuyanewcarandtellyourself,“IhopeIdon’tscratchit.”Withintwenty-fourhourssomekiddemolishesyourtaillightwitharunawayshoppingcartYouspendayearplanningaskiingvacation.Youtellyourself,“IhopeIdon’tgetsick!”Youcatchthe’fluontheflightoutandspendtheweekinyourhotelroom.
Wemayexplainthesethingsawayascoincidence.It’smorethanthat.
Quantumphysicshasnowprovenwhatspiritualmastershavetaughtforthreethousandyears:thoughtaffectsmatter,andeverybodyandeverythingisconnected.
Thoughtsarerealthings.Yourthoughtscreateyourcircumstances.Butthatisonlyhalfthestory.WhatmattersmostishowyouFEEL.
ThisbookisaboutwhyGOODTHINGSHAPPENWHENWEAREFEELINGGOOD,whyBADTHINGSHAPPENWHENWEAREFEELINGBAD–andhowtofeelbettersothatmoregoodthingshappen.
Intheprocessyoumaygetsomeinsightinto:
whybadthingssometimeshappentogoodpeoplewhyplacebosworkanddietsdon’twhyrichpeoplemakemoney–evenbyaccidentwhyJanenowhasboyfriendscomingoutherears.
Whetheryougetthejobofyourdreams,whetheryoustayhealthy,orwhetheryoufindyourperfectlifepartnerdependsonhowyouFEEL.
HowLifeWorksmayconfirmwhatlogictoldyouisimpossible,butapartofyoualwaysknew.
Yourlifeisnotalottery.Itneverhasbeen.
TheRedBMW
WhenIwastwenty-six,IdroveanoldDatsun180B.IwantedanicecarandIhadabudgetof$10,000.
Ihadfriendswhostuckphotographsoftheirgoalsontheirrefrigerators.Theytoldme,“Whatyouplantinyoursubconsciousmindyouattract.”SoIcutoutacolourpictureofabrightred320iBMWfromamagazineandstuckitonthewallabovemydeskathome.Nobodysawit.Itoldno-oneaboutthecarIwanted.FromtimetotimeIimaginedhowitwouldfeeltodrivea320i,butIdidnothingaboutit.
AfewweekslaterIwasinacoffeebarchattingwithmybuddy,Steven.Helovedcars.Heaskedme,“Whydon’tyougetyourselfadecentsetofwheels?”
Isaid,“I’mplanningto.”
ButInevertoldhimwhatcarIwantedorwhatmybudgetwas.
Amonthwentby,andIbumpedintoSteven.Hesaid,“There’sagreatlittlecarforsaleinayardinFranklinSt.”
Isaid,“Whatisit?”
Hesaid,“ABMW.”
Nowhehadmyinterest.“Whatmodel?”
“320i.”
“Whatcolour?”
“Brightred.”
“Howmuch?”
Hesaid,“It’s$11,500butyoucouldoffer$10,000.”
Myeyesalmostpoppedoutofmyhead.Ithought,“Thisisweird!”
Iboughtthecarfor$10,000–andfiguredthewholethingwasacoincidence.Afterthirtyyearsofwatchingthesethingshappen–andstudyingpeoplewhomakethingshappen–Iknowitwasn’t.
Hundredsofbookshavebeenwrittenaboutthepowerofthesubconsciousmind,includingThinkandGrowRich1,PsychoCybernetics2,TheMagicofBelieving3andThePowerofPositiveThinking4.
Themessageinallthesebooksisthatthoughtiscreative,andthemoreyouthinkaboutsomething–whetheryouwantitorwhetheryoudon’t–themorelikelyitistohappen.
Sohowdoesthesubconsciouswork?Andhowimportantisbelief?
Let’stakealook…
2.WhatControlsYourLifeIsthistypical?
MarygoesonthelatestHollywooddietMarylosestenkilogramsintenweeksandlookssensationalMarypilesontenkilogramsinthenextsixweeksandlooksliketheusualMary.
Whyisthat?Becausehersubconsciousmindisincontrol.Andsoisyours.
Youcanstarveyourselfwithwillpower.Youcaneatgrapefruitorevengrass.Youcanlose50kilograms.Butuntilyoursubconsciousaccepts“Iamslim”,allweightlossistemporary.
Inabattlebetweenwillpowerandyoursubconsciousmind,yoursubconsciouswillalwayswin.
SoHowPowerfulIstheSubconscious?
Everynightwhenyougotosleep,youcontinuebreathing,yourheartkeepspumpingandyoucontinuedigestingdinner.Sowhatiscontrollingallthat?Andwhatstopsyoufromwettingthebed?It’syoursubconsciousmind.
Ninety-ninepercentofyourbrainpowerisinthatpartofyourmindofwhichyouarenotaware.
Amazing,isn’tit?Youcandriveacar
whilemunchingpeanuts,singingtotheradioandplanningdinner.Everyfewsecondsyousteer,brakeoracceleratewhilegivingnothoughttocontrollingthecar.Sowhoisdoingthedriving?
It’syoursubconscious.
OneBigRecorder
Ifyouaskatouchtypist,“Whereareallthelettersonyourkeyboard?”she’llprobablyhavenoidea!Shecanpunchout80wordsperminuteblindfolded,butshecan’tTELLyouwherethekeysare–untilshestartstyping.
Why?Thekeyboardisinhersubconscious.
Yoursubconsciousmindisonegiantrecorder.Ithasprogramsyouwerebornwith–thatregulateyourbreathing,yourheartbeatandathousandotherbodilyfunctions–andithasprogramsyoucreated–likehowtowalk,talk,type,dance,driveandwhistle.
Itiseasiesttocreatenewprogramsbeforeyouaresixyearsold.
WhyChildrenLearnSoFast
Children’sbrainwavesaredifferent;theyareslower,andthatiswhychildrenliveinthepresentmoment.Untilyouareaboutsix,youareanopenbook,effortlesslydownloadinginformation.
Childrenhavenoadultconsciousmindsaying,“Thisistoohard.”That’swhythree-year-oldspickupRussianorChinesewithouteffort;it’swhyfour-year-oldslearntosnowskiinthreehours.
Childrenhavenofilters,nobarriers.Thisexplainswhyyoucanretardalittlechildforlifebytellinghimheisstupid.Whateveryoutellafour-year-old–“Youarebeautiful”,“Youarespecial”,“Youarealoser”,“YoumakeMummyunhappy”–becomeslawforhim.
Thesubconsciousexplainsalotofbadbehaviour.Youletafour-year-oldplayendlesscomputergameswithkicking,punchingandswearing–andwatchmovieswithkicking,punchingandswearing–andyoucreateabrat.Thereisnoadultconsciousmindtofilterwhatisokayforamovieandwhatisnotokayforreallife.Thebehaviourissimplydownloaded.Thenweblamethekids.
THESUBCONSCIOUSMINDDOESN’TARGUE.ITJUSTACCEPTSINFORMATIONASFACT.
“IJustWanttoDoNothing”
Yoursubconsciousmindtakesinstructionsveryliterally.
NicoleplannedavacationinBali.Shetoldme,“InthemonthsbeforemyBalitrip,Ikepttellingmyself,‘AllIwanttodoisliedownanddonothing’.”
Iaskedher,“HowwasBali?”
Shesaid,“Igotafive-daymigrainethattransformedintothe’flu.Ispentthewholeweekinmyhotelroomdoingnothing.”
TwoyearslaterNicolereturnedtoBali.Sheexplained,“Istilldidn’tunderstandthatIhadhelpedtocreatemyillness.SobeforethesecondvisitIkepttellingmyself,‘WhenIgettoBali,Iwanttoliedownanddonothing’.”SohowwasBali?
Shetoldme,“Icaughtaparasiteondayone;Icouldn’teat,couldn’tdrink,couldn’tread,couldn’tevensitup.Ispentfivedaysinhospitalonadripdoingabsolutelynothing.”
Whenyouplantathought,yoursubconsciousdelivers.
Nicolewasn’tfinishedwithBali.Shesays,“FormythirdvacationIhadanewstrategy.Ivisualisedmyperfectholidayaheadoftime.Isawmyselfhealthyandmychildrenhealthy.Iimaginedushappilyplungingdownwaterslides,relaxingbythepool,enjoyinggreatshoppingandwonderfulfood.
“Finally,wehadtheperfectvacation.”
Ifyouwintenmilliondollarsyouarejustatemporarymillionaire.
YourSubconsciousandMoney
William“Bud”Postwon16milliondollarsinthePennsylvaniaStateLottery.Bud’sbrotherhiredahitmantokillBudsohecouldinheritit(Budsurvived),hisex-girlfriendsuedhimforachunkofit,andhisfamilyhoundedhimfortherestofit.
WithinayearBudwasamilliondollarsindebt.Budmightargue,“Myproblemismyrelatives!”
Butsevenoutoftenlotterywinnerslosethelot.
Ifyouwintenmilliondollarsyouarejustatemporarymillionaire.Whetheryoustayrichhaslittletodowithclawingrelativesorglobalfinancialcrises.Ithaseverythingtodowithyoursubconscious.
InaNutshell
Yourbeliefswilleventuallytriumphoverwillpower.
3.WhyDotheSameThingsKeepHappeningtoMe?
Patterns
Haveyounoticedthatsomepeoplearealwaysbroke?Youcanhandthem$10,000cash,andbeforeyouknowittheyneedabankloantobuyapizza.
Somepeoplearealwayslate!Theycangetupat6amtobeatworkbynineandattenfifteentheyarestillcombingthehouseforcarkeysandhuntingfortheirwallet!
Somepeoplearealwaysbusy.
Somepeopleareforevergettingrippedoff–bysalesmen,phonecompanies,oldgirlfriendsandlong-lostrelatives.
Didyouevermeetaladywhosaid,“Ialwaysendupdatingjerks.”?Shehasaradarforfindingrude,selfish,lazypeople–andthenshemarriesthem.
Somepeoplestartanewrelationshipeverysixweeks.
“Ineedspace.”
Togetit,youhavetofeelit.
Somepeoplemakefriendswherevertheygo.Somepeoplemakemoneywherevertheygo.
Somepeoplehavefunwherevertheygo.Somefootballersarealwayswheretheballis.
Somepeoplealwayslandontheirfeet.Theirpatternsays,“Thingsalwaysworkout.”;Ted’scarbreaksdowninthemiddleofnowhere,andastrangerpickshimup,driveshimhomeandthenoffershimajob!
Subconsciouspatternsarewhyhistoryrepeatsitself.So,forexample,Maryalwaysfindswonderfuljobsbutneverfindsfaithfulboyfriends.Billnevergetssickbutkeepsgettingthesack!
Noneofthisiscoincidence.Weeachattract–andcreate–ourlifeexperiencesthroughoursubconsciousprograms.
Yousay,“Ifyoursubconsciouspatternscreateyourlife,there
wouldbehappypeoplewhosailfromoneadventuretoanotherandmiserablepeoplewhostaggerfromonedisastertoanother.
Andsomepeoplewouldkeepgettingricher,andsomepeoplewouldkeepgettingpoorer!”
Thatishowitis.Thatishowithasalwaysbeen.
InaNutshell
Lifeunfoldsfromtheinsideout.
TheGoodNews
Here’sthegoodnews:youarenotyourpatternsandYOUCANCHANGEYOURPATTERNS.
Forlifetogetbetter,youdon’tneedtodwellonhowyoucreatedyourpast.Youdon’tneedtoworryaboutwhatyoudid“wrong”.
Youjustneedtounderstandthatyouhelpedcreateitandbegintothinkandfeeldifferently.“I’vegotaheadache.”
“I’vegotaheadache.”
“I’mpositive.It’smystupidhusbandthat’stheproblem!”
4.HowWeSeeOurselves.Ifyousurveypeopleinashoppingmallandaskthem,“Areyougenerous?”,evenpeoplewhoneverevergaveacenttoacharityorapandawilltellyou,“SureI’mgenerous.”Nobodythinkstheyaremean!
Askanyone,“Haveyougotasenseofhumour?”Everybodyhas!Whendidyouevermeetsomeonewhosaid,“Idon’tknowwhat’sfunny.”?
Andeveryguythinksheisagreatdriver!
Weseeourselvesaswewanttoseeourselves.
Soifyouaskpeople,“Areyoupositive?”,mostpeoplethinktheyarepositive.Theysaythingslike,“I’mpositive.It’smystupidhusbandthat’stheproblem!”
Negativepeopledon’tthinkthey’renegative.Theythinktheyarerealistic.
Mostofusgrewupwithworriedparentswhotaughtustoworry.Theytolduswhatwecouldn’thave,whatwecouldn’tdoandwhatwewouldneverbe.Thenightlynewsconfirmedthattheworldisadangerousplace.
Howonearthcouldwebecomefearless,freespirits?
InaNutshell
Formostofus,negativebecamenormal.
NegativeRats
Manypeopleseemhappyandpositive,butweneverknowtheirinnermostthoughts.Howoftendowediscovertooursurprisethataneighbourorarelativewasdoggedbyyearsofdepression,guiltandsuffering?
Negativethoughtsarelikerats.Theyarriveingroups.Oneshowsup,andbeforeyouknowittheyhavetakenover.
EXAMPLE:Youtakeaphonecallfromarudecustomeratwork.Yourfirstthoughtis:“Ihaterudepeople.”
Followedbyyournextnegativethought:“InthisjobI’msurroundedbyrudepeople!”
Andyournextnegativethought:“InthisjobI’msurroundedbyrudepeopleandI’munderpaid.”
Andthenext:“InthisjobI’msurroundedbyrudepeopleandI’munderpaidandunder-appreciated.”
Andthen:“InthisjobI’msurroundedbyrudepeopleandI’munderpaidandunder-appreciatedandcometothinkofit,I’mnotappreciatedbymyhusband,either.”
Nowtheratsarearrivingindroves:“InthisjobI’msurroundedbyrudepeopleandI’munderpaidandunder-appreciatedandI’mnotappreciatedbymyhusbandandtonightI’llhavetocookdinner.Whycan’thegetoffhisbackside?MymotheralwaystoldmeIwasmakingaseriousmistake.AndnowI’vegotaheadache.Maybeit’satumour!”
Isthisfamiliar?Aloneratbecomesaplague.
Youneedanexterminationstrategy,andhereisthebeststrategyIknowtoridyourselfoftherats.Themomentyouhaveyourfirstnegativethought,youaskyourself,“What’sgoodaboutthis?”
What’sgoodaboutconfrontingrudepeople?
“I’mbuildingcharacterandpatience.”“I’mdevelopingpeopleskillsthatwillhelpmeinmynextjob.”“Therudepeopleatworkhelpmetoappreciatemyhusband.”
Nowyoumightsay,“Let’sberealistic.”HERE’SREALISTIC:
Lousythingshappen.Happypeoplehavethehabitofsaying,“What’sgoodaboutthis?”
Youbreakyourleg.“What’sgoodaboutthis?”
“Igettorest.”“I’lllearntoempathisewithsickpeople.”“I’llreadsomegreatbooks.”
Yourgirlfrienddumpsyou.
“What’sgoodaboutthis?”
“Icansavemoney.”“I’llseemoreofmybuddies.”“IcanwatchallthefootballIlike.”
InaNutshell
Onenegativethoughtattractsanother.Onepositivethoughtattractsanother.Beforetheplaguestarts,askyourself,“What’sgoodaboutthis?”
“Itriedbeingpositiveanditdoesn’twork!”
Fredhaslivedfortwentyyearsonhamburgers,doughnutsandCocaCola.Heisoverweightandexhausted.
Thenhediscoversabookthatsays,“Whatyouputinyourmouthmatters.”Hebuyssomecarrotsandbeans.Heeatssalad
forfourdays.
Afterfourdays,Fredsays,“IfeelnobetterandI’malwayshungry!”Fredgoesbacktoburgers.
Asalmostanyoneknows,fourdaysofsaladisagoodstart,butitcan’treversetwentyyearsofjunk!
Itisthesamewithourthinking.
Maryhaslivedfortwentyyearswithaheadfullofjunkthoughts:“Iamuseless.Ihatemylife.Ihatemyjob.Icanneverpaymybills.”
Shehastheoccasionalhappythought,“Ilovemydog.”Buttherestofthetimeismostly,“Lifeistoughandthenyoudie.”
Thenshereadsaninspirationalbookthatsays,“Whatyouthinkabout,youbecome.”Shetriestoimagineherselfashappyandsuccessful.Shetellsherself,“Iamabundant.Iamawinner.”
Shestickswiththepositivethinkingforfourdays.(Herhusbandthinksthatshehasjoinedaweirdcult.)
Afterfourdaysshelooksatherpileofunpaidbills,andsays,“Mylifeisnobetter.”Shegivesup.“Thatwastoohardandit’sridiculous.”
Here’sthepoint:youcan’tfixalifetimeofjunkeatinginafewdays,andyoucan’tfixalifetimeofjunkthinkinginafewdays–orafewweeks.
Beforewedismisstheideathatthequalityofourthoughtscreatesourqualityoflife,weshouldaskourselves,“HaveIthoroughlytestedthis?”
InaNutshell
Whatyouthinkabout,youbecome.Butmanypeoplegiveuptoosoon.
Wemightalsoaskthequestion,“Whatisathought?”
PollutedwaterfromtheFujiwaraDam.
Thesamewaterafteraprayeroffering
byaBuddhistmonk.
“Youdisgustme!”
“Loveandgratitude.”
Hereishardevidencethatyourthoughtsaffecttheworldaroundyou.
5.WhatIsaThought?Youmightsay,“Ifonlysomeonecoulddemonstratethatmythoughtscreatemyreality,thenIwouldbecarefulwhatIthink.Ifsomeonecouldshowthatthoughtaffectsmatter…”
Well,oneJapaneseresearcherhasbeendemonstratingitforyears.
DrMasaruEmotohasspentdecadesstudyingwater.Hefreezesitandthenphotographstheicecrystalsunderadarkfieldmicroscope.Now,here’swhat’sfascinating:hetalkstothewaterbeforehefreezesit,andtheicecrystalsrespondtohisconversation.
Toonejarofwaterhe’llsay,“Iloveyou,”andtoanotherjarhe’llsay,“You’reugly.”Thewaterthatisappreciatedformsexquisite,highlyorganisedcrystals–likejewels.Andthewaterthatiscriticisedcrystallisesintouglyblobs.
Already,thissoundslikesciencefiction,butitgetsmoreamazing.DrEmotohasdemonstratedthatyoudon’tevenhavetotalktothewatertoinfluencethecrystals.Youcanjustthinkaword–andsendthatthoughttothewater–andtheicecrystalswillreflectthequalityofyourthoughts.
Anditgetsmorecrazy.Youdon’tevenhavetosendathought.Youcansimplywriteawordonthesideofthejar,freezethewaterandobservesimilarresults.Wordsoflove,encouragementandgratitudeproducebreathtakingcrystals.Wordsofhateandcriticismproduceverydifferentformations.
Emotohasexperimentedwithwritingallkindsofwordsonthe
jars:gratitude,hope,hate,homecooking,conveniencefood.Heusesdifferentlanguagesandgetsthesameresults.Heplaysmusic–Beethoven,Mozartandheavymetal–towaterandphotographsthecrystals.Theillustrationsoppositeareselectedfromhundredsinhisbooksandfromhiswebsite,www.masaru-emoto.net5.
DrEmotohassharedhisresearchattheUnitedNations.Hisbooksareinoverfortylanguages.Hisfindingsareastunningillustrationofhowourworldworks.Hereishardevidencethatyourthoughtsaffecttheworldaroundyou.
Emoto’sworkissupportedbyotherresearch.McGillUniversityAssociateProfessor,BernardGrad,6whoexaminedwaterafterithadbeen“treated”bypeoplewithhealingabilities,discoveredthattherewas“afundamentalchangeinthebondingofthehydrogenandoxygeninitsmolecularmakeup.”Russianresearch7supportsGrad’sfindings.
Wecouldlistanynumberofexperimentswithsimilarfindings,involvingpeopleinsteelboxes,psychicplantsandbabyrabbitsinsubmarines.EvenAlbertEinsteinconductedhisownexperimentstoexplorethephenomenonofremotecommunication.Hecoinedtheterm,“SpookyActionataDistance”.
TheOldReality
Youask,“SowhatdoessciencehavetosayabouttheworkofDrsEmotoandGrad?”Mostly,itpretendsthesethingsdon’thappen!
Here’stheproblem:modernsciencestandsonthefoundationofhistory’sgreatestscientist,SirIsaacNewton.Newtonformulatedthelawsofmotionandgravitation,andadvancedourunderstandingofmathematics,mechanics,astronomyandmore.
Healsoconductedmanyexperimentstodemonstratetheinfluenceofmindonmatter.
Butsomeofhisworkwaslostinalaboratoryfire,andsomeofithasbeenmisunderstood.ModernsciencehastotallyignoredNewton’sconclusionsonthenatureofthought.
SciencehasusedamereportionofNewton’slifeworktoconcludethattheUniverseoperateslikeagiantmachine.ThisviewoftheCosmosisknownasthe“NewtonianModel”,andwestuckwithitfor400years.
Youlearneditatschool:yourteachersshowedyoudiagramsofatomsandtoldyoua)atomsarethebuildingblocksofeverything,b)everythingcanbemeasuredandc)thoughthasnoeffectonthephysicalworld.
ButNewtonwasastudentofancientwisdom.TheideaofamechanicalUniverseunaffectedbyprayerorhumanthought–thatweattributetoNewton–isaveryconvenientmodel,butNEWTONWOULDNOTAGREEWITHIT!Andthismodelcan’texplainDrEmoto’scrystals.
WenowknowthatsomethingscannotbemeasuredandthattheUniverseisnotlikeamachine.
TheNewReality
Wenowhavemicroscopesthatallowustoseeinsideatomsandwehavereceivedsomebigsurprises.
Wediscoveredthat:
solidlittleatomsarenotreallysolid.Theyare,infact,packetsofenergythesepacketsofenergyappearanddisappearasingleparticlecanbeintwodifferentplacesatonce.That’sright!Theexactsamemoleculecanbeinyourkitchenandinyourbedroomatpreciselythesameinstant.
Thisistheworldofquantumphysics.Thereisnosuchthingassolidmatter.Asastrophysicist,SirArthurEddington,said,“Thestuffoftheworldismind-stuff.”8
Sowhatdoesthisallmean?
Ifyouarebattlingtopaybillsorfightingchickenpox,thephysicalworldseemsfairlyreal!Almostanybodywouldsuggestthatparkingticketsandvirusesarerealthings,andthoughtsandfeelingsarelessreal.
Sowhywouldanyonearguethatourthoughtscanaffectthings?
BecausetheUniverseisnotlikeabigmachine;itismuchmorelikeabigthought.Buthere’swhat’sextraordinary:peopletalkaboutquantumphysicsinscienceclassoratadinnerparty,butbeyondthat,theymostlypretenditneverhappened.
ThecrazyNewAgeideathateverythingisconsciousnessturnsouttobecutting-edgescience!Youareconsciousness,
everythingaroundyouisconsciousness,andhowyouthinkandfeeldetermineswhatyouget.
Youmightsay,“Okay,soeverythingweknowismadeofthoughtenergy.BUTmythoughtsarejustonesmallcollectionofenergyinthishumungoussoupofthoughtswecalltheCosmos.Howcouldmythoughtspossiblybeinteractingwithallthatistocreatemylifeexperience?”
TheUniverseisanenergysystem,constantlybringingitselfintobalance.Youarepartofit.
Everytimeyouhaveathought–“Iwantanewjob”,“Imightgetthe’flu”,“Ineverhaveenoughmoney”,“Everythingwillworkoutfine”–youshiftthebalance.Thebalancerestoresitselfasyourthoughtsmaterialise.
InaNutshell
Thoughtsarerealthings.Thoughtschangesituations.
FromNothing?BeLogical!
Yousay,“Butwait!Howcansolidstuffmaterialisefromtheinvisible?”
Well,let’slookathowtheUniversegothereinthefirstplace.Mostpeoplebelieveinoneofthreepossibilities:
Solidstuffappearingfromnothinghasalonghistory.
1. GodmadetheUniversefromnothing,andwedon’tknowhow
2. TheUniverseexplodedfromnothing–TheBigBangtheory3. TheBigBangtheorywasGod’sidea–inotherwords,abig
bangisaverycost-effectivewayforGodtomakeaUniverse.
Yousay,“Outofnothing?Let’sbelogical.”
Well,scientistsarelogical.SowhatdoesProfessorStephenHawking,theworld’smostcelebratedcosmologist,havetosayaboutcreatingsolidstufffromnothing?Hesays:
Butwithoutadoubt,themostremarkablefactofall,isthattheentire,enormousuniverse,alltheinnumerablegalaxies,eventimeandspaceandtheforcesofnaturethemselves,simplymaterializedoutofnothing.9
Hesaysthateverythingeruptedfromthevoidasaboilingfurnaceofhydrogen.Eventually,thispureenergycooledintocountlesssub-atomicparticlesandbecametheUniverseyouknow–includingourEarthandMoon,theHimalayas,youreyelashes,thegoldonyourfinger,ahundredbillionothergalaxiesandallthechocolateinBelgium–outofnothing.
ScientistssaytheUniversecamefromnothing.SpiritualpeoplesayGodmadetheUniversefromnothing.Visibleappearingfromtheinvisiblehasalonghistory.
Yousay,“Butthat’snotlogical!”
NothingabouttheCosmosislogical.Nothingaboutlifeitselfislogical.
Weliveinanever-expandingUniverse.Howlogicalisthat?AndwhatistheUniverseexpandinginto?Spacethatisalreadythere?Orspacethatisn’tthere?
AndwhatisattheedgeoftheUniverse?Afence?
TheUniverseisn’tlogical.Itismagical.
InaNutshell
TheUniverseisn’tlogical.Itismagical.
Whileyouarefeelingbad,lifejumpsonyourhead.
6.YouGetWhatYouFeelThoughtandfeelingshavetheirownmagneticenergywhichattractsenergyofasimilarnature…ThisistheprinciplethatwhateveryouputintotheUniversewillbereflectedbacktoyou.
“Whatthismeansfromapracticalstandpointisthatwealwaysattractintoourliveswhateverwethinkaboutmost,believeinmoststrongly,expectonthedeepestlevelsand/orimaginemostvividly.10
ShaktiGawain
IwassittingonaplanewaitingtodepartHobartairport.Weweredelayedbyonefinal,ratherbreathlessandangry-lookingpassenger.
Whenshesawthatsomeguyhadparkedhisbig,black,heavybriefcaseinthespotaboveherseat,shebecameangrier.Whenshediscoveredthattherewasnoroomforherbagsanywhereintheoverheadlockers,shebegantolookseriouslydisturbed.
Andsoshesatseethingfortheentireflightwithherbagwedgedbetweenherfeet,irritatedbytheoffendingbriefcase.
Youmightguessthestoryfromhere.Welanded;theownerofthebriefcasestoodup,reachedovertoretrieveitfromthelockeranddroppeditonherhead.
BAM!WhenyouFEELthatlifeisagainstyou,itis.
Weattractpeopleandcircumstancesthatmatchhowwefeel.Whenwefeelhappy,weattractpositivecircumstances,andwhenwefeelupsetandangry,weattracteventstomakeusfeel
worse.
TheRulesoftheGame
Imaginethatyouwereplayingaballgameandyoudidn’tknowtherules–andotherplayerskeptjumpingonyourhead.
Wouldn’tyoufeellikeavictim?Wouldn’tyoudecide,“Thisisunfair!Idon’twanttoplayanymore!”?
Butthenifsomeoneexplainedtherules–“Whileyouareholdingtheballanyonecanjumponyourhead”–thatwouldreallyhelp!
Thegameoflifeissimilar.Youneedtoknowtherules,whichare:WHILEYOUAREFEELINGBAD,LIFEJUMPSONYOURHEAD.Wheneveryouareradiatingthoughtssuchas“I’mhopeless,angry,frustrated,jealous,scared,avictim”,lifebeatsyouup.
Nowondersomepeopledecide,“Lifeisunfair!Idon’twanttoplayanymore!”
Whenyouarehappy,lifeandpeoplerewardyouinthemostunexpectedways.
Whenyouarestressed,angry,orfeelinglikeavictim,lifekicksyouintheteeth.Whenisitthatyoujamyourfinger,biteyourtongue,stubyourtoe?Doesithappenondayswhenyouarefeelinggreat?No,ithappenswhenyouarefrustratedandangrywithyourself.
Whendoairlinesloseyourbaggage?Onthosedayswhenyouarehappyandexcited?Orattheendofalongtripwhenyouareexhaustedandcomingdownwiththe’flu?
Whatcomesfirst?Thoughts?Orfeelings?
Mostoften,itseems,thoughtscreatefeelings,abitlikeingredientscreateacake.
Youtakeathought,“Myhusbandalwaysleaveshisemptybeercansonthecoffeetable”,blenditwith“Heneverevennoticedmynewhaircut”andletitstewovernightwith“Ican’tsleepbecauseofhisconstantsnoring”andyoucreateanangryfeeling.Youtakeathought,“I’mluckytohaveajob”,mixitwith“Mostdaysaregooddays”andsprinkleitwith“Lifeisgettingbetter”andyoucreateahappyfeeling.
TheTHOUGHTSinyourheadbecomeAFEELINGinyourheart.
Here’sthegoodnews:changingyourthoughtscanchangehowyoufeel.
NegativeThoughts
Here’smoregoodnews:afewnegativethoughtswon’truinyourlife.
Youhaveupto50,000thoughtsperday.Amongstthose50,000thoughts,someareboundtobeabitnegative.
Theoddpassingthoughtwon’tmakeyourichorpoor,happyormiserable.
Butawholebunchofthoughtsisadifferentmatter.
Lotsofsimilarthoughts–forexample,lotsofhappythoughtsorlotsof“Lifeislousy”thoughts–becomeafeelingthatyoumayholdontoforawholedayoraweekoralifetime.
WeAttractWhat
WeFeelOnemorningin2004,mywife,Julie,andIhadadisagreement.Isaidsomethinginsensitivethatmadeherfurious.Idon’trememberwhatIsaid,butintwentyyearsIhadneverseenhersomad.
AsJuliegrabbedhercarkeysandleftforherappointmentIthoughttomyself,“NoonewhoisasangryasJulieisrightnowshouldbeanywherenearanautomobile!”
Nottenminuteslater,shewassittinginhercaratanintersection,perfectlystationary.Avanapproachedthecrossroadsathighspeed,lostcontrol–anddrovestraightintoJulie’scar.ThankGodsheescapedunhurt.
AsJuliesoondiscovered,thevanwasdrivenbyanotherveryangrylady.
Youask:
WasJuliethinkingaboutacaraccident?No!DidJuliewanttheaccident?No!Wassheexperiencingintensenegativeemotion?Yes!Didshehaveanintenselynegativeexperiencetomatchherfeelings?Absolutely!
Yousay,“ButJulie’scarwasn’tevenmoving.Itwasn’therfault!”
AskJulieandshewilladmitthatshecreatedherexperience.Shewilltellyouthatshehadaheadfullof“Todayislousy”
thoughts,andlifedeliveredanexperiencetomatch.Youareamagnet.Howyoufeelaboutyourselfdeterminesthequalityofyourexperience.
Yousay,“Doesthatmeanthateveryonewhoisangryinacarwillhaveanaccident?”No.Itmeansthatifyouarefullofanenergythatsays,“Lifestinks”,thenlifewilldeliveryou“Lifestinks”experiences.Andifyouaredrivingacaratthetime,anaccidentismorelikely.
Ifyouarehavingintensefeelingsofstress–youfeelthatlifeisunfair,thatyouarebeingpunishedbypeoplewhoareirresponsible–thenlifewilldeliveryouanexperiencethatwillmatchthatfeeling.Itmightbeanaccident,itmightbeanillness,oritmightbesomethingelseunpleasant.
Upliftingthoughtsattractupliftingexperiences.Angry,victim-typethoughtsattractlow-energyexperiences.Youcan’tdeterminetheexactnatureofallyourexperiencesbyhowyoufeel–whoyoumeetandexactlywhathappens–butyoudeterminetheQUALITYofyourexperiences.
InaNutshell
Whenyouarefeelingangryordepressedandyouaskyourself,“Whatelsecangowrong?”theansweris,“Quitealot!”
AMagicalLife
Achangeoffeelingisachangeofdestiny.11
NevilleGoddard
Didthiseverhappentoyou?
YouwenttoaninspiringseminarYoureadanupliftingbookYoujoinedachurchYoufellinlove.
Youfeltsogood.Lifewasdifferent,almostmagical.Itwaslikeyouhadbegunawholenewchapter.Youwereoptimistic.Challengeswereeasiertohandle,youhadmoreenergy,andpeoplewerenicer.Maybeyouthought,“Thisisthehowmylifewillbefromnowon.”
Youwerecruising–forthreeweeks.Thengradually,thingsreturnedtonormal.
Sowhathappened?Wereyoukiddingyourself?Wereyoudeluded?
No,youweren’t.YouweresimplyFEELINGbetter,andyourhappierfeelingscreatedhappiercircumstances.Butthenyourenergydropped–maybeyousufferedadisappointmentortwo–andyouwerebacktonormal.
Butsomepeopleneverreturntotheoldnormal.Theybeginanewchapterintheirlifeandcreateanewnormal.
TheykeepreadinginspirationalbooksTheymixwithupliftingpeopleTheydevelopimmovablefaithTheyfalldeeperinlove.
Inotherwords,theykeepFEELINGgood.Andsotheybecomeoneofthosepeoplewholiveacharmedlife,whoturndefeatintovictoryandwhoalwaysmeettherightpeopleattherighttime.
InaNutshell
It’snotwhatyouknowsomuchashowyoufeel.
GettheFeeling
Togetwhatyouwant,youfirstneedtohavethefeelingofwhatyouwant–asifithasalreadyarrived.Youmayask,“Isn’tthatthesameasprayer?”
Itcanbe,butitusuallyisn’t.
Mostofuslearnedtoprayinadifferentway,suchas:“God,Iamapowerlesssinnerandmylifeisamess.Canyoupleasefixit?”Thisapproachdoesn’twork,andnowweknowwhy.Ifyouarefilledwithfeelingsofdisappointmentandpowerlessness,andthebeliefthat“Iamabadperson”,youcreatemoreexperiencestomatch.
LostinTranslation
Soyouask,“Ifthemostpowerfulformofprayeristofeelthefeelingofyourwishfulfilled,whyisn’tthatspelledoutinChristianteachings?”
Itwas.Butitgotwatereddownandlostintranslation.Forexample,inthemoderncondensedKingJamesBible,inJohn16:24,weread:“Askandyeshallreceivethatyourjoymaybefull.”
Sowhatislost?
Comparethiswiththeoriginaltext:“Askwithouthiddenmotiveandbesurroundedbyyouranswer.BEENVELOPEDBYWHATYOUDESIRE,thatyourgladnessmaybefull.”12Inotherwords,feelitallaroundyou,alreadycomplete.
Traditionalculturestheworldoveracknowledgethepoweroffeeling.TheNavajoIndiansunderstandthatyoudon’twishforrain.YouFEELtherain.Yougivethanksthatithasalreadyarrived.
TibetanBuddhistMonksknowthatthemostpowerfulformofprayeristoprayFEELINGTHATTHEPRAYERHASBEENANSWERED.
Inhisbook,SecretsoftheLostModeofPrayer,GreggBraden13
describeshisexperienceinthemountainsofTibet.Bradenwantedtoknow,“Whatishappeningwhenmonkspray?”Whatishappeningwhentheychant?Whythegongs,thebells,themantras?Inafreezingstonemonasteryat14,000feet,
Bradenaskstheabbot,“Whenweseeyourprayers,whatareyoudoing…whatishappeningontheinside?”
Themonkreplies,“Whatyouhaveseeniswhatwedotocreatethefeelinginourbodies.Feelingistheprayer!”
Feelingistheprayer.Thatishowlifeworks.
WhyisitthatMuslims,Hindus,BuddhistsChristiansandJews–whethertheybefundamentalist,orthodox,unorthodox,charismatic,neo-charismaticormetrosexual–believeinprayer?Itisbecauseitisnotaboutyourparticularbrandorreligiousfaction,anditisnotaboutthewords.Itisaboutthefeeling.
Whenyourfeelingisaperfectmatchwithyourgoal–ortoputitanotherway,whenalldoubtiseliminated–thegoalisyours.
AttimesinmylifeIthought,“IfIjustsufferenough,maybeGod–ifHeisupthere–willfeelsorryforme.MaybeHe’llsendmeamilliondollars.”
Itdidn’thappen.
Mostly,itseemed,theguyswhoreceivedamillionweretheguyswhoalreadyhadamillion:“Fortoonewhohasit,itwillbegivenanditwillbeincreased.”14
Affirmations
Affirmationsarepositivephrasesthatwerepeattoourselvesoverandover.Youhaveprobablyheardofphraseslike“Iamamoneymagnet”or“EverydayineverywayI’mgettingbetterandbetterandbetter.”
Somepeopleswearbythem.Otherpeopleswearthattheyareawasteofenergy.Howcanthisbe?
Itisbecauseitisnotthewordsthatmatter;it’sthefeeling.AffirmationswithoutfeelingAREuseless;youmayaswellchantphonenumbers.
Butifyoucanfeelyouraffirmations,ifyouregularlytell
“JustwhenIthoughtIhadfoundMrRighthebecameMrLearningExperience.”
yourselfthingslike,“IhaveeverythingIneed”,“Mylifeisgettingbetter”,“IamlovedandIamloveable”,“Iamhealthy”,“Iamrich”,andfeelitandbelieveit,lifewillgetbetter.
FirstGettheFeeling
Wegrowupbelieving,“Whenthingsgetbetter,THENIwillfeelbetter.”Itsoundsreasonable.Butitistheslowwaytogetresults,anditishardwork.
TryfixingarelationshipwhileyoufeelbadaboutitTrygettingrichwhenyoufeelpoorTrysucceedinginajobyouhate.
Whenisitthatyoustarttoclimboutofanymess?Onlywhenyoustarttofeelhopeful.
FIRSTcomesaglimmerofhope.Then,perhapsyougetsomeencouragementfromafriend.Youstarttofeelbetter.Youreadabook.Youtakealongwalk.Youfeelbetterstill.Yougetalittleinspiration.Otherpeoplearrivetohelp.Youareonyourway.
Butfirst,youneedthatglimmerofhope,alittlebelief.OnlyTHENdothingsstarttoimprove.ItallhappensAFTERyoubegintofeelbetter.
InaNutshell
Experiencefollowsfeeling.Feelingistheprayer.
FindingMrRight
Whatdomanypeopledowhentheyarelookingforlove?Theyhangoutinsleazybarsdrinkingmorethantheywant.Theresultsareoftendisappointing.ExplainsMary,“JustwhenIthoughtIhadfoundMrRight,hebecameMrLearningExperience!”
Youdon’thavetotrawlthebarsandyoudon’thavetoimpressanybody.
Peopleinhappyrelationshipswilltellyou,“Ialwaysknewtherewouldbesomeoneforme.”Theyfeltit.
YourmissionistoFEELloved–notWISHINGyouhaditbutFEELINGYOUHAVEITnow–byimaginingyourperfectrelationshipandbybeingkindtoyourself.
Whenyoustartwiththefeeling,theUniversewillbegintoorganiseitselfaroundyou.Opportunitieswillarise.Yougowiththeflow.
Whenyoufinallyhavethat“knowing”thatheisoutthereandwhenyoustopbeinginahurryforhimtoarrive,MrRightwillwalkintoyourlife.Noonecankeephimout.
InaNutshell
Ifyouwanttoseeithappenyoufirstneedtofeelithappen.
Relax!
Inthe1980sItaughtaweekendrelaxationcourse.Overtwo
andhalfdays,theattendeesalsolearnedtolikethemselvesalittlemore.
Here’swhatamazedme:intheweeksfollowingtheircourse,peoplewouldreportallkindsofwonderfulhappenings.“Mybackpainhasdisappeared!”“Mybossisfriendlier.”“Ijustgotpromoted.”“Myfamilyismoreconsiderate.”“Myhusbandismoreloving.”“Islashedmygolfhandicap!”
SoIwouldaskthem,“Whatdidyouvisualisetomakethishappen?”Sooftentheywouldsay,“Nothing.”
Yearin,yearout,thestorywasthesameformostoftheattendees.Iwondered,“Whyareallthesepeoplereportingsuchpositiveresults?Alltheylearnedtodowasrelaxandfeelbetter!”
Youareacomplexballofenergy.Yourenergyballincludeseverythought,wishandfearyouhaveeverhad.Yourenergyiscreatingyourlife,momentbymoment.Youdon’thavetofigureeverythingout–butyoudohavetostopfightingandworryingandrelax.
InaNutshell
Whenwefeelbetter,betterthingshappen.
Ifyoucanfeelalittlebettertodayandalittlebettertomorrow,that’senough.
“WhatifICan’tFeelBetter?”
Yousay,“HowcanIfeelgreatwhenIfeelterrible?”Youcan’t.Youdon’thaveto.Youjusttakeonestepatatime.
Ifweweretorankemotionsonaladder,withthemostpositiveatthetop,wemightlistthemlikeso:
10.LoveandJoy9.Happiness8.Optimism7.Contentment6.Pessimism5.Disappointment4.Worry3.Anger2.HatredandRevenge1.FearandGrief
Soyouask,“HowdoIgetfromfeartojoy?”Thesamewayyougetfromfirstgeartotenthgearonabicycle,orfromfirstgeartofifthgearinyourcar.Youjustmovetothenextgear.
Youdon’tjumpfromhatredtojoyovernight–butyoucanmovefromhatredtoanger.Andangerfeelsbetterthanhatred.That’sprogress.
It’showlifeworks–onestepatatime,onerungatatime.Youdon’tgofrom$30,000peryearto$300,000peryear,butyoucan
getto$40,000andthen$60,000andkeepgoing.Itislike
buildingmuscle,gettinghealthyorlearninganewlanguage.
Ifyoucanfeelalittlebettertodayandalittlebettertomorrow,that’senough.
ItDoesn’tSeemFair
Yousay,“WhatifIamillorinpain?Howdoyouexpectmetofeelhappyandpositive?It’snotfair!”
Maybeitisn’tfair—butitisalawoflife:foryourcircumstancestoimprove,youfirsthavetofeelmorepositive.
Lawsdon’tcarewhatyouthink.It’slikewithgravity:ifyoutripoverthecatandbreakyourarm,youcanargue,“Gravityisn’tfair!”Butgravitydoesn’tcare.
Itmightseemlikeacrueltwist:“WhyshouldIhavetoFEELsuccessfulorlovedbeforeIcanBEsuccessfulorloved?”ItmayseemlikeanoddwaytorunaUniverse.Buthereishowthespiritualmastersexplainit:
Youareapartofeverything.Nooneisstoppingyoufromhavinganything.Godisnotstoppingyoufromhavinganything.Youalreadyhaveeverythingyouwant;youjustdon’tknowit.TheonlythinginyourwayisYOURBELIEFS.
Whenyouchangeyourbeliefs–andaseverythingisvibration,thismeanswhenyouchangeyourvibration–yourgoalsbegintodropinyourlap.
InaNutshell
Lifedoesn’thappentoyou.Lifehappensthroughyou.
TheEleventhHour
Haveyounoticedthatthingsusuallylookmostbleakjustbeforetheystarttogetbetter?Theentrepreneurisdowntohislastdollarwhenhefinallyscoresthebigdeal.Theinjuredathleteisreadytoquit,butshegivesitonelastshotandwinsthegoldmedal.
Youseeitallthetimeinmovies.Youseeitinmoviesbecauseithappensallthetimeinlife.Thereisaprincipleatworkhere.Thedarkesthourisoftenjustbeforethedawn.Itisalmostlikelifetestsus:“Areyouserious?”Thebiggerthegoal,thedarkeritgets.
InaNutshell
Thisdarknessbeforethedawnisknownastheeleventhhour.Buttheeleventhhourisanimpostor.Sooften,ifwejusthangon,thetidewillturn.
7.TheLawofAttractionYourmindislikeaniceberg:thepowerisinthepartthatyoudon’tsee.Everythoughtandfeelingthatyouhaveeverhadisthereinyoursubconscious.Itisdrivingyourlife.
Sothequestionis,“HowdoIprogrammysubconscioustocreateandattractwhatIwant?”
Theanswerthatfewpeopleknow–andthereasonforthisbook–isthatFEELINGSreprogramyoursubconscious.NevilleGoddard,20thcenturylecturerandauthor,explainsinhisbook,FeelingIstheSecret:
Ideasareimpressedonthesubconsciousthroughthemediumoffeeling.Noideacanbeexpressedonthesubconsciousminduntilitisfelt…Thesubconsciousisthewombofcreation…Itneverchangestheideareceivedbutalwaysgivesitform.15
YouimpressyoursubconsciousbyFEELINGwhatyouwanttobe;youhavetofeelrich,feelsuccessful,andfeellovedFIRST.Togetit,youhavetofeelit.
Whateverchangesyouwanttomakeinyourlife,youhavetofeelthem.AsGandhisaid,“Wemustbethechangewewanttosee.”
InaNutshell
Everythingstartswithin.Buddhasummeditup2600yearsago:“Youarenotofthisworld;thisworldisinyou.”
EverythingHasaUniqueVibration
Yousay,“That’sfineforBuddha,butIwantalogicalscientificexplanation!HowdoMYthoughtsandfeelingsattractthings?”
Let’stakeacloserlookatvibration.
Eventocavemen,itwasobviousthatSOUNDisactuallyvibration.Then,inthe17thcenturywebegantounderstandthatLIGHTisactuallyvibration.
Andinthe20thcentury–afterscientistsbrokeatomsintosmallerandsmallerparticles–wefinallyrealisedthatMATTERisactuallyvibration.Everythingisvibration!Andofcourse,vibrationisenergy.
Apeanutisapeanutonlybecauseitsenergyhasaparticularvibrationorfrequency.So,too,foradiamond,afeatheroraFrenchfry.
FortheLawofAttractiontowork–orevenforustoconsideritseriously–everybitofmatterintheUniversewouldneedtohaveadifferentfrequencyfromeveryotherbit.
Everypeanutwouldneedtovibratedifferentlyfromeveryotherpeanut.Everysparrow,bacterium,lotteryticketandLamborghiniwouldneedauniquesignatureor“cosmicbarcode”,sothatitcanbefoundinthiswarehousewecalltheUniverse.
NOTE:Ifyouarenotsointerestedinscience,youmaychoosetoskimoverthenextfewparagraphsandre-joinmeat“ChainReactions”.
AuniquevibrationforeverythingintheUniverse!Isthispossible?
AccordingtoquantumphysicsandProfessorWolfgangPauli,
absolutely!WolfgangPauliwonaNobelPrize–andAlbertEinstein’sadmiration–forhispartindiscoveringanewlawofnature,nowknownasthePauliExclusionPrinciple.16
Inphysicswelearnthatallelectronshavethreeproperties:a)energylevel,b)spinandc)orbit.Physicistsmultiplytheenergylevel,spinandorbittocalculatethe“quantumnumber”ofanelectron.
PaulidiscoveredthatNOTWOELECTRONSINTHEUNIVERSECANHAVETHESAMENUMBER!
SoWhat?
Toexaminethislaw,let’stakeanapple–andfromthebillionsofelectronswithintheapple,let’schoosejustoneelectron.We’llcallhimErictheElectron.Eric’squantumnumberwouldbeanimpossiblylongone,buttokeepthingssimple,let’spretendhisquantumnumberis23.
PauliprovedthatnowhereintheUniverse–notinalltheapplesinalltheworld,notinsomedistantshootingstar,noteveninthewhiskerofanarcticmouse–cantherebeanotherelectronwiththequantumnumber23.
It’sabitlikeeveryelectronintheUniversebelongingtothesamefootballteam,andnotwoelectronsbeingallowedtohavethesamenumber!
Sowhathappensifwepolishtheapple?Frictionaddsenergy.EnergyincreasesEric’squantumnumber.Suddenly,Eric’squantumnumberjumpsto,say,26.
AttheexactinstantthatEric’snumberleapsto26,theoneelectronintheentireUniversewithaquantumnumberof26–whetheritisoutbeyondtheMilkyWayorinyourporridge–
willinstantlychange.
ChainReactions
Whenyoupolishanapple,whenyoukissyourlover,whenyoucurseyourneighbour,whenyouforgiveyourbrother,whenyouscratchyourbackside,yousendchainreactionsacrosstheUniverse.EachtimeoneofEarth’ssevenbillionpeoplehasafleetingthought,electronsacrosstheUniverseadjust.Eachtimeyouhaveathought,electronsacrosstheCosmosadjust.
OurUniverseisrearrangingitselfeverymillisecond,bringingitselfintobalance.ProfessorPauliprovedit–anditisnotevencutting-edgescience.PauliwonhisNobelPrizein1945.
Wearenotlonecogsinsomegiantmachine.Wearewrappedinonegiantliving,breathingblanket.Somecallitconsciousness.
Ifeveryelectronhasauniquevibration,theneverythinghasauniquevibration.ScienceconfirmstheteachingsofBuddha,AristotleandJesusChrist:
EverythingintheUniverseisconnectedThoughtdoesn’tjustaffectmatter;thoughtismatter.
ThisIsNothing
NewHere’sthegoodnews.Whateveryouhaveinyourliferightnow,youcreated.Withyourvibration,youattractedit.Thismeansthatwhenyouchangehowyoufeel,youchangewhatshowsup.
Yousay,“Howdowechangeourvibes?”Whenwefindawayto:
lookforgoodthingseverydayquitblamingeveryoneelsequitblamingourselvesquitworryingseethebestinpeople.
Youmaynoticesomething.Thisiswhatgreatspiritualteachershavealwaystaught:BEGRATEFUL,FORGIVEPEOPLE,LOVEMORE,BLAMELESSANDBELIEVETHINGSWILLWORKOUT!Thisishowyoubecomeamagnetforeverythingyouwant.
InaNutshell
Allthatspiritualadviceweheardovertheyears–thatseemedlikeitwasdesignedtopunishus–actuallymakesusmorepowerful.
“Whatdosensiblepeoplesay?”
Youmaysay,“Thisideathat‘Weareallconnectedandourthoughtscreateourreality’soundsveryNewAge.
“Whatdopracticalpeoplesayaboutthis?Whatdoseriousbusinesspeoplesay?”
Let’sstartwiththeindustrialist,AndrewCarnegie.Heusedhisunderstandingofthesubconsciousmindtobecometherichestmanintheworld.
Ultimately,Carnegiedecidedtosharehissuccessstrategies.Sohecommissionedtheyoungjournalist,NapoleonHill,towork
alongsidehimandwriteabooktoexplainhissecrets.
CarnegieintroducedHilltodozensofentrepreneurs,includingHenryFord.Fordalsounderstoodthesubconsciousmindandbecameoneoftheworld’srichestmen.
Hill’sbook,TheLawofSuccessin16Lessons,ultimatelybecameThinkandGrowRich,17andremainsaninternationalbest-sellereightyyearslater.ThecentralmessageofThinkandGrowRichis:
WHATTHEMINDOFMANCANCONCEIVEANDBELIEVE,ITCANACHIEVEYOUBECOMEWHATYOUTHINKABOUTMOSTOFTHETIME.
Nevertheless,mostofthemillionsofpeoplethatreadthebookneverachievedalltheirdreams.TherearesomeconceptsinThinkandGrowRichthatdeservefurtherexplanation,forexample,“What’shappeningwhenthelawofattractionseemsbroken?”
“WhyisitthatIcanattractsomanythings
8.WhentheLawofAttractionFailsJanicewrote:
DearAndrew
IknewabouttheLawofAttractionlongbeforeitbecamepopularinNewAgebooks.Iwouldpicturemyselfworkinginanewcompany,andsomehowitwouldhappen,almostbymagicandwithouteffort.Iwouldseemyselflivinginanimaginaryapartmentandthenfindthatapartmentbyaccident.
Iwouldimagineparkingspacesinimpossibleplacesandgetthem.IfIwantedtoreadabookorwatchavideo,Iwouldseeitinmymind,andastrangerwouldmiraculouslygiveittome,orIwouldfinditinasecond-handstorewhenIwaslookingforfurniture.
IalsoattractedsomebadstuffwhenIworriedtoomuchaboutwhatIdidn’twant!
Thekeyalwaysseemedtobe:behappy,andrelaxintotheknowingthatitwillhappen.ItishowIhavemostlylivedmylife.IhavealsooftenwishedIhadamilliondollars,butitneverlandedinmylap.
Inyourbook,FollowYourHeart,youtalkedaboutattractingthings.Sohere’smyquestion:whyisitthatIcanattractsomanythingsthatIwantbutnotthemilliondollars?
Istherealimittothisstuff?WhyisitthatthisLawofAttractiondoesn’talwayswork?CoulditbethatthatGodsays,“No!”?
Iwantbutnotthemilliondollars?”
Janice
Here’swhathastakenmethirtyyearstofigureout,andwhatmostbooksdon’tthoroughlyexplain.
WhentheLawofAttractionseemstobebroken,it’susuallybecause:
wechoseagoalthatdidn’treallyexciteuswegotstuckin“reversegear”–meaningwefocusedonLACKwechosegoalswedidn’treallybelievewerepossible.
Let’sexaminethesepointsoneatatime–andlookatwhattodoaboutit.
ChooseaGoalYouReallyWant
Excitementmakesthingshappenfast.It’stheE-MOTIONthatsetsyourdreamsinmotion.
Feelingsofdisappointment,jealousy,boredomordesperationslowlifetoacrawl.That’swhyithelpstobeenthusiasticaboutourlifeandourplans.
Sometimes,wechooseagoalthatwethinkisexciting,butit’snot.Ifthegoalisnotexciting,wedon’tkeepthinkingaboutit;sowedon’tattractit.
Theperfectexampleisamilliondollars.
Anyonemightarguethatamilliondollarsisreallyexciting,butactuallyit’sboring.It’sjustabunchofpaper.Wouldyoueverspendyourtimedreamingaboutaboxfulofcash?Youwouldn’t.Amilliondollarssittinginthebankmightseemlike
aniceidea,butitwillnevergiveyoubutterfliesinyourstomach.
WhatisexcitingisWHATYOUCANDOwithamilliondollars:youcancreateanewbusiness,takeyourkidstoDisneyland,shifthouse,buyyoursonamountainbike,enjoyaworldcruise,quityourjobandgostudyarchaeology.
Peoplewhosucceeddon’tdreamaboutmoney.Theydreamabouthowtheywillmakeitandwhattheywilldowithit.Theyfeelitintheirbones.
Youneedtofeelyourselfexperiencingyourgoals.Photographsonyourrefrigeratorhelp.PicturesofAlaskancruiseshipsoryourdreamapartmentkeepyouexcited.Photographsonyourwall,bathroommirror,phoneorscreensaverofthespecialdog,horse,car,boat,helicopter,bicycleorguitarthatyouwanttoown,keepyouon-track.
FocusonWhatYouWant
Nowhereiswheremanypeople–likeFred–getconfused.
Fredsays,“I’vebeenthinkingaboutmydreamfortwentyyears,anditneverhappened!”
Butmostlikely,FredhasbeenthinkingaboutNOThavinghisdream.He’sbeenupsetanddisappointedaboutmissingoutfortwentyyears,andyoucan’tattractanythinggoodwhenyouareangry,upsetordisappointed.
Here’salittleexampleofhowwesometimesshiftourattentionfromHAVINGsomethingtoNOTHAVINGsomething.ImaginethatyouwalkintoJoe’sRestaurantinyourlunch
hour.
Youorderyourfavouritepizza.Fifteenminutesgobyandnopizza.(“Where’smylunch?”Alreadyyouareannoyed.)Theladiesatthenexttablegettheirspaghettimarinara.(“What?Iwasherefirst!”Nowyouareangry!)Youcomplaintothewaiter,“Whereismypizza?”Youtextyourfriend,“Theyforgotmypizza!”Forty-fiveminutesgobyandnopizza.Theladiesfinishtheircoffeesandleave.Youarefurious.Yougrabyourcoatandstormout.
Sowhatwereyouthinkingaboutwhileyouwerewaiting?Yousay,“Iwasthinkingaboutmypizza!”Butyouweren’t.Youwerethinkingaboutyourpizzaforthefirstfifteenminutes.Afterthat,itwasallLACKofpizza.
Foryoursubconsciousmind,PIZZAandLACKofPIZZAaretwototallydifferentsubjects.PIZZAISONITSWAYhasalight,happyvibration,andTHEYFORGOTMYPIZZAisaheavy,angryvibration!
Sooften,wethinkthatwearedwellingonwhatwewantandweexpecttheLawofAttractiontodeliver,butweareactuallypumpingoutthe“IHAVENOPIZZA”vibration.Sowekeepmovingawayfromwhatwewant.
SowhataresometypicalLACKthoughts?
IwishIwasrichIwishIwasconfidentIwishIhadadifferentjobIwishIhadaloving,caringhusbandIwishIwashealthyWhere’smydamnpizza?
HowdoyouknowtheseareLACKstatements?Becausewhenyourepeatanyofthemyoufeelbad.Andwhenyoufeelbadyougetmorelack.
StuckinReverseGear
Fredsays,“Ithinkaboutmoneyallthetime,butIambroke.”
Actually,FredisthinkingaboutNOTHAVINGmoneyallthetime.ThinkingabouttheLACKofprosperityistheexactoppositetothinkingaboutprosperity.Fredisstuckinreversegearanddoesn’tknowit.
Yousay,“Doesitmatter?”Itmatters!Itmattersmorethanpeopleeverimagine.
FeastorFamine
Howoftendoyouhearthis?
Billappliesfortwentyjobsintwelvemonthswithoutluck.Assoonashegetshired,hegetsthreemorejoboffers.Why?Hespentayearfocusedonlack.Assoonashegotajob,hisenergyshiftedfromlack–“Nobodywantsme”–to“Peoplewantme.”Whenyoufeelwanted,peoplehireyou.Bingo!
Orthis?Acoupletryfortenyearstohaveababy.Eventuallytheyadopt–andimmediatelyshegetspregnant!Theywenttenyearswiththefeelingofnobaby.Whensuddenlytheyhadthejoyandthefeelingofhavingachild–baby!
SoHowDoIKnowifMyThinkingIsCreatingGoodResults?
Itissosimple,itisridiculous.IfyoufeelGOODwhenyouarethinkingaboutyourgoal,youarecreatinggoodthings.IfyoufeelBADwhenyouarethinkingaboutyourgoal,youarecreatingwhatyoudon’twant.
YouimpressyoursubconsciousbyhowyouFEEL–nothingelse.YourmissionistoFEELGOODEVERYWAKINGHOUR.Your
missionistofeelgoodeverytimeyouthinkaboutwhatyouwant.
Fredsays,“Howcanyouthinkaboutamilliondollarsandfeelbad?”Veryeasily.Mostpeopledo.
InaNutshell
Whenyoufeelgood,youarecreatingwhatyouwant.Whenyoufeelbad,youarecreatingwhatyoudon’twant.
LukeSkywalker:“Ican’tbelieveit.”Yoda:“Thatiswhyyoufail.”18
YouNeedtoBelieveItIsPossible
Fredreadsoneofthosebooksthatsays,“Youcanhave,beordoanythingyouwant.”Fredsetshisfirstgoal:amulti-million-dollarmansion.Hethinksaboutitonceortwice.
Daybydayyounotice,“LifeworkswhenIamfeelinggood.”
Whenhethinksaboutithefeelsbadbecausea)hereallydoesn’tbelievehe’llgetit,andb)he’sthinkingaboutthosesnooty,richpeopleinnicehouses.Fredsoongivesuponthemansion.
Youask,“Togetsomething,doyouneedtobelieveitispossible?”Yes,youdo.
Ifyoubelieveyourgoalispossibleyoufeelgoodthinkingaboutit.Becauseyoufeelgoodthinkingaboutit,youoftenthinkaboutit.Youarecomfortablewithit.
Weachievegoalswithwhichwearetotallycomfortable.
Howimportantisbelief?Theentertainer,Seal,shareshisexperience:
Itwasn’tthatwewerethebestatwhatwedo.Wherewegrewuptherewerepeoplewhosangwaybetterthanwecould–butnoonebelievedharderthanwedid,andthatbeliefwasunrelenting.19
Unrelentingbelief.Youjustkeeponpumpingoutthatvibration.
WhyBeliefMatters
Let’ssayyouwanttogetfit,youwantabetterjoboryouwantahappierrelationshipwithyourhusband.Ifyoubelieveitisperfectlypossible,youenjoythinkingaboutiteverysparemoment.Sobelievingitandfeelinggoodcauseittohappen.
Butwhatifyoudon’tbelieveitispossible?Youfeelbadthinkingaboutit.Soyoudon’tthinkaboutit.Soyoudon’tattractit.Yousay,“HOWcanIfeelgood?HowcanIbelievein
anythinggoodwhenmylifehasbeensodisappointing?”
SmallSteps
Youdevelopyoursubconsciousmusclelikeyoudevelopanyothermuscle.Youpractisewitheverydaythings.Youpractisefeelinggoodwitheverythingyoudo,everyday.Yousetsmallgoals,everyday.Stepbystep.Forexample:
Youneedtomakeaspeech.YoupractiseFEELINGgoodaboutit.Aheadoftime,youimagineyourselfreceivingcongratulationsfromtheentirecrowd.Youplaymentalmoviesofyourownsuccess.Youareabouttodriveyourcarthroughanunfamiliarcityinrushhourandyouarefeelingnervous.Youimagineyourselfinyourcar,RELAXEDandsingingtoyourself.Youareworriedaboutpayingyourbills.Youbegintovisualisepayingthosebillswithasmileonyourface.Youregularlyaffirmtoyourself,“IhavemoremoneythanIneed!”Moreandmoreoftenyoufindyourselfmakingendsmeetwithlessandlessstress.
Daybyday,younoticethat“LifeworkswhenI’mfeelinggood.”Peoplerespondpositively,opportunitiesevolvefromthestrangest“coincidences”andimpossibleproblemsevaporate.
Weekbyweek,youdevelopaknowingthatlifeissomehowarrangingitselftosuityou.Youdevelopaquietconfidencethat“Mylifealwaysworksout.”
Yourfriendssay“How?”
Yousay,“Idon’tknowhow.Idon’tevenworryabouthow.”Nowyouhavethemuscletomanagebiggergoals.Thebookstellyou,“Yourmindisamagnet.
Gooutandhave,beordoanythingyouwant.”Theoretically,it’strue.Butyouneedtobuildyoursubconsciousmuscle.Youneedtorefineyourballofenergy.
ButHOWDoesThisAllHappen?
Theobviousquestionsare:
HowcanIpayoffmybillsifIdon’tevenknowhowtomakethemoney?HowcanIsellmyhouseinabadmarket?HowcanIpossiblygetabetterjob?HowwillImeetmyperfectmate?
It’sabitlikethesatellitesaying,“Howwillmysignalfindthetelevision?”It’snotanissue.Thesignaliseverywhere,butitonlyresonateswithtelevisionsthataretunedin.
Whenyouassumethefeelingofhavingfoundtheperfectmateorjob,yoursignaliseverywhere–butyouonlyattractthemateorbosswhoisvibratingatasimilarfrequency.
Successfulentrepreneurs,authors,sportsstarsandhappilymarriedcouplesassumethefeeling.
Youdon’thavetoalwaysbeincontrol.Youdon’tevenhavetoknowHOW.
InaNutshell
Yourproblemisnottofigureouthow.Yourmissionisjusttoassumethefeeling.
9.Imagine!In1986Idecidedtowriteabook.Iknewnothingaboutwritingbooks.SinceschoolIhadneverwrittenanythinglongerthanapostcard.AllIknewwasthatIhadatitle–BeingHappy!–andIwantedtosellamillioncopies.
Iwroteonepageperday,beforebreakfast.
Ialsomadeacassetterecordingtoplayinmycar.Ithadasimplemessagethatrepeatedoverandover:“‘BeingHappy!’isaninternationalbest-seller.”Itcontinuedforhalfanhour.
Forthewholeof1987,IplayedthisrecordingeverytimeIgotintomylittleredcar.Well,actually,IonlyplayeditwhenIwasalone–myfriendsseemedtopreferDireStraits.
Inmid-1987IsentmycompletedBeingHappy!manuscripttopublishersaroundtheworld.AllIreceivedwererejections.Thebookmayhavebeenasuccessinmysubconscious,butitwasn’tdoingverywellanywhereelse.
ItseemedIhadhitabrickwall.
TheninMarch1988,IwaspassingthroughSingaporewhereIhadlunchwithafriend,JacquieSeow.Iaskedher,“Wouldyouliketoreadmymanuscript?”Jacquieagreedtoreaditandsaid,“Thereisapublisherlivinginmyapartmentbuilding.I’llshowittohim.”
Ithought,“ASingaporeanpublisher?That’snotpartofmyplan.”IgaveJacquiethebookbutIdidn’tholdmybreath.
Withintwoweeks,IhadapublishingdealwithJacquie’sneighbor,Ian,andwithineighteenmonthsIwaslivingoffmyauthor’sroyalties.BeingHappy!1continuestoselltoday.
Youask,“Andrew,whatifyouhadneverusedthetaperecording?Wouldithavehappenedanyway?”
TwoFriendsPlay-acting
Inthe1970sFredCouplesandJimNantzwerebuddiesattheUniversityofHouston.FredwasadedicatedgolferwithdreamsofwinningtheUSMasters,andJimhadambitionsofbecomingatopsportsannouncer.
Together,theywouldoftenplay-actascenewhereFred,havingjustwontheUSMasters,wasinterviewedbytheCBSannouncer,JimNantz.
In1992,FredwontheMasters.HewasusheredintotheButlerCabintoreceivethefamousgreenjacket–andthere,togettheinsidestory,wasCBS’sJimNantz.
Atthecloseoftheinterviewtheyembracedwithtearsintheireyes,nodoubtreflectingonhowtheimaginaryscenethattheyhadsooftenrehearsedinHoustonhadjustunfoldedbeforetheworldinAtlanta.
WouldFredCoupleshavewontheMastersGolfChampionshipwithouttheplay-acting?WouldJimNantzhaveachievedhisdreamwithouttheplay-acting?Woulditallhavehappenedanyway?
Here’swhatIknow:there’snotasuccessfulactor,astronaut,brainsurgeon,pilot,popstar,presidentorpoledancerwhodidn’timaginetheirdreamoverandoverandoveragainlongbeforeithappened.
InaNutshell
Everythingisconnected.Nothinghappens“anyway”.
WhatHappensWhentheLawofAttractionDoesn’tWork?
Lawsalwayswork.
Thelawofgravityisneverbroken.Forexample,whenaplaneflies,itdoesn’tmeanthatthelawofgravityisbroken.Itmeansthatforcesstrongerthangravityarepullingtheplaneupward.Oncethereisenoughmomentum,theplaneliftsofftheground.
Thelawofattractionisthesame.Youneedmomentum.Youplantyourgoalfirmlyintoyoursubconscious.Onceitisthere,youhaveit–butmostimportantly,ITHASYOU.
Whenyourgoalhasyou,youdon’thavetofigureeverythingout.Itismorelikeyougoalongfortheride.Whenyouhavetheknowingthatyouwillbesuccessful–anditisonlyamatterofWHEN–doingtheworkisajoy.Doingyourbestisautomatic.
Whenyourgoalisn’tshowingup,oneoftheseexplanationsislikely.
Youchoseaboringgoalandquitthinkingaboutit;soyoudidn’tattractitYougotstuckinreversegearwithLACKthoughts.IfyoudwellonlackyougetmorelackYouaredoubtingit,andwhenyoudoubt,youdon’thavethenecessaryFEELINGtoachieveyourgoalYouneverbecamecomfortablewithit.
“SetaDate!”
Here’ssomethingelsethatthebookstellyou,butwhichoftendoesn’thelp.Theytellyou,“SetaDATE!”Theytellyou,“Chooseadatebywhichyouwillhaveboughtthehouse,foundtheperfectwife,scoredthedreamjob.”
Datesusuallyaddstressandgiveyoureasontodoubt.
Obviously,sometimesyourplansareattachedtoafixeddate–awedding,aspeechoratournament.Itmakessensetoseeandfeelthoseeventsunfoldingperfectly,attachedtoadate.Butinmostotherinstances,seeandfeelyourgoalsachievedandletthemunfoldintheirowntime.
SoHowDoIKnowWhenMyGoalsWillHappen?
Whenyourgoalfeelsperfectlynatural–whenyousaytoyourself,“Iknowitisgoingtohappen,andIamsocomfortablethatthiswillhappenthatI’minnohurry”–thatiswhenyourdreamjob,orboyfriend,showsup.
ButItWouldHaveHappenedAnyway!
Whenlifeworksout–whenyourloverwalksintoyourlife,whenyougethead-huntedbyarivalcompany,whenyourheadachesdisappear,whenyourbookhitsthebest-sellerlist–there’sthequestion,“DidIattractthis,orwouldithavehappenedanyway?”
Whenyoufeelgood,andkeepfeelinggood,opportunitiesand
Somepeoplejustknowthatthoughtsaremagnetic.Theydon’tneedtobeconvinced.
goodpeoplejustkeeponfindingyou.Justkeepdoingwhatworks.
WhataboutPeopleWhoSay,“Thisisallgarbage!”?
I’vealwaysbelievedinmagic.WhenIwasn’tdoinganythinginthistown,I’dgoupeverynight,sitonMulhollandDrive,lookoutatthecity,stretchoutmyarmsandsay,“Everybodywantstoworkwithme.I’mareallygoodactor.Ihaveallkindsofgreatmovieoffers.”
I’djustrepeatthesethingsoverandover,literallyconvincingmyselfthatIhadacoupleofmovieslinedup.I’ddrivedownthathill,readytotaketheworldon,going,“Movieoffersareoutthereforme.Ijustdon’thearthemyet.”2
JimCarrey,Actor
In1990,comedianJimCarreywasstillstrugglingtogetwork.Itwasononenightduringthatyear,sittinginhisoldToyotalookingdownonLosAngeles,thathewrotehimselfacheque.Itwasfortenmilliondollars,foractingservicesrendered.
Jimcarriedthechequeinhiswallet.By1995hehadstarredinAceVenturaPetDetective,TheMaskandDumbandDumber.Hisaskingpricewasnowtwentymilliondollarspermovie.
Plentyofpeopledon’tbelievethatthoughtaffectsmatterorthatwecreateourownsuccess.Buthereisachallengeforyou:findonewildlysuccessfulpersonwhodoesn’tbelieveit.
WhatdopeoplelikeJimCarrey,OprahWinfrey(thefirstbillion-dollartelevisionhost),Madonna(300millionalbumssold)andJackCanfield(500millionbooksinprint)sayaboutthepowerofthemind?Theywilltellyou,“Whatyouholdinyourmind,youattract.Whatyouholdinyourmind,youbecome.”
ThereareotherjournalistswhointerviewaswellasOprahWinfrey.AmillionotherpeoplehavehadbetterideasthanRichardBranson.
Buttheotherscouldn’tBELIEVEaswell.Andthisincludesyourbrother-in-lawwhosays,“Thisisallfantasy!”.Whodoyouwanttobelieve?
HowCanIBeHappyWhenIAmBroke?
IwasinaKualaLumpurshoppingmallin2013whenamanapproachedme.Hewascasuallydressedbutimmaculate.Hesaid,“AreyouAndrewMatthews?Ireadyourbooktwentyyearsago.”
Isensedhehadastorytoshare.SoIinvitedhimtoStarbucks.
Hesaid,“I’mTeukufromAcehinIndonesia.Myfamilywasverypoor.WhenIwasinuniversityIwassopoorthatIownedjustonepairoftrousers.Iwassopoorthatmygirlfriendwouldgivemehershirtstowear.ManydaysIhadnothingtoeat.
“WhenIwasatmylowestpoint,afriendloanedmetheIndonesianversionofyourbook,BeingHappy!3
“Apartfromtextbooks,itisthefirstbookIeverread.Ibegantounderstandthatwechooseourthoughts.Ibegantofocuson
whatIHADinsteadofwhatIDIDN’THAVE.
“ImadealistonacardofeverythingIwantedformyfuture:agoodjob,awife,twohealthychildren,anapartment,anicecar…”
Heleanedforward,“TodayIamtheregionalbusinessdevelopmentmanagerforamulti-nationalcorporation.Itraveltheworld.Ihaveawifeandtwobeautifulgirls.Theygotothebestschools…”
Teuku’seyeswelledwithtears.“Yourbookchangedmylife.”
Myeyeswerefulloftears,too.IfeltsohappyforTeuku.
Imustmaketwopointshere.Firstly,mybookdidn’tchangehislife;Teukuchangedhislife.Secondly,thereisnothingnewinmybooks.Theseprincipleshavebeenaroundforever.
Teukusaid,“Istillhavebaddays.SoIkeepthatcardonmywalltoremindmehowfarIhavecome.”
Heaskedaboutmynextbook.IexplainedthatHowLifeWorkswasaboutthepowerofemotion:“Howyouthinkmatters,buttherealpowerisinhowyoufeel.”
InaNutshell
Teukusaid,“Forthelasttwentyyears,wheneverIwantedtogettothenextstep,Iwouldtrytofeelwhatitwouldbeliketobealreadythere.
“WhenIwashungryIwouldtrytofeelwhatitwouldbeliketohaveenoughfood.WhenIhad
nojobIwouldtrytofeelwhatitisliketohaveajob.WhenIwasaworkerIwouldtrytofeelwhatitisliketobeamanager.”
Heasked,“Isthatwhatyourbookisabout?”
Yes,Teuku,thatisexactly,absolutelywhatthisbookisabout!
Whataboutthosesuccessfulpeoplewhoneverreadabookaboutthesubconsciousmind?
Somepeoplejustknowthatthoughtsaremagnetic.Theydon’tneedbooks.Theydon’tneedtobeconvinced.
Somepeoplearebornknowingwhattookmeathousandbooksandthirtyyearstounderstand.TheyjustspendtheirlifeFEELINGasgoodastheycanandknowingthateverythingwillworkout.
TheyjustknowTHISISHOWLIFEWORKS.
10.TheWorldIsYourMirror
Haveyounoticedthatwhenyouleavetheofficefeelingirate,peopleabuseyouinthesubway?Thereverseisalsotrue.Howdifferenttheworldlookswhenwefallinlove!
Theworldisamirror;whatyoufeelinside,yougetontheoutside.ThisiswhyYOUCAN’TFIXLIFEBYWORKINGONTHEOUTSIDE.Ifpeopleonthestreetareunfriendly,changingstreetsdoesn’thelp.Ifnobodyatworkgivesyouanyrespect,changingjobswon’tfixit.
Mostofuslearnedthingsinsideout!Welearned,“Ifyoudon’tlikeyourjob,changeit.Ifyoudon’tlikeyourwife,changeher.”Sometimesit’sappropriatetochangeyourjoboryourpartner.Butifyoudon’tchangeyourthinking,youaresettingyourselfupformoreofthesame.
Ifyouloveyourself,peoplewillloveyou.
EXAMPLE:Carol’shusbandBobgiveshernohelp.Theybothworkninetofive,butBobgiveshernohelpwiththekidsandnohelparoundthehouse.Weeknightshegoesdrinking;weekendshegoesgolfing.Shefeelslikeaservantandsheresentshim.
Butit’snotaboutBob.It’sabouther.Aslongasshefeelslikeaservant,shewillbetreatedlikeaservant.Forlifetochange,CarolhastovalueCarol.Theminuteshefeelsworthwhile,deservingandloveable,shewillfindsupport–eitherfromBoborfromsomebodyelse.
It’salwaysaboutourselves.
EXAMPLE:Friendsandfamilyarealwaysimposingonyou.Wheneversomebodywantstoshifthouse,theyaskyoutopackandcarryboxes.Whenpeopleneedaride
totheairportat4am,theycallyou.Youaskyourself,“Whydon’ttheyvalueMYtime?”
Becauseyoudon’tvalueyourtime!Whenyouchange,theychange.
It’sNotaboutTHEM
Manypeoplenevergetit.Theyspendalifetimeblamingotherpeople–butit’snotaboutOTHERPEOPLE.
Ifyoufeelthatyoudeservetobepaidnothing,youwillfindabosswhopaysyounothing.Ifyouignoreyourfeelings,youwillgetajobwherepeopleignoreyourfeelings.Maybeyou’lljointhearmywherepeopleshoutatyou!It’snotaboutTHEM;it’saboutyourrelationshipwithYOU.
Ifyouhateyourbigbackside,youwillfindaboyfriendwholaughsatyourbigbutt.Whenyouacceptyourbacksideyouwilllikelya)changeboyfriendsorb)discoverthatyouroldboyfriendhasanewattitude.Itwasneveraboutyourboyfriend.Itwasalwaysaboutyourattitudetowardyou.Ifyourbossdemandsbetterresults,ifyourwifewantsmorefromyou,itisusuallybecauseinyourheart,youwantmorefromyou.Evenracialprejudiceandreligiousprejudiceisn’taboutTHEM.Whenyouacceptyou,peopleacceptyou.
Ifyouloveyourself,peoplewillloveyou.
InaNutshell
Youcreateyourworld.Youdon’thavetoconvinceanybodyelse.Youjusthavetofeeldifferent.
ThePerfectEvening
Lifeisalwaysreflectingbacktoushowwefeel.
EXAMPLE:Youhavefriendsintown.Youdecidetotreatthemtoagreateveningatyourfavouriterestaurant,Coco’s.
Youcalltherestauranttobookatable.Themaîtred’says,“Sorry,we’refull.”
“Whatdoyoumean,you’refull?”
“We’rebookedout.”
“ButI’maregular!Fitmeinsomewhere!”
‘I’msorry.”
Youslamdownthephone.“Damnit!Thisshouldhavebeenagreatevening.”You’reangry.
Youchooseanotherrestaurant.Thefoodisgreasy,theoystersstink,youarguewithyourwifeallthewayhomeandyouwakeupwithfoodpoisoning.
OR…
Themaîtred’atCoco’ssays,“We’refull.”
Yousay,“Great.We’veeatentheretwentytimesanyway.Weshouldtrysomethingelse.”Youcallyourex-bosswhoknowsallthebestrestaurants.Herecommendsanewplacethatisevencloser.
Thefoodisunforgettable.Youchatwiththecoupleatthenexttableanddiscoverthattheyareyourneighbours.Youmakesomenewfriends,andnextweekyouallgotoCoco’s.
Isn’tthishowlifeworks?
Ifyoubelievethatlifeisagainstyou,itis.Thereisanotherwaytolive:believethattheUniverseisplottingtomakeyouhappy.
InaNutshell
Theharmonyyouseekisnotwithotherpeople;itiswithyourself.
WeAttractWhatWeFear
FormytenthbirthdaymyGrandpagavemeawatch.Inthe1960swatchesweren’tcheap!Iwassoproudandalittlenervous.Ithought,“Ihadbetternotbreakthis!”
WhenIshoweredthatnightIplacedmybrandnewTimexcarefullyonthesinkbesidemypyjamas.Iwashedanddriedmyself–andasIpickedupmypyjamas,thesleeveknockedmybeautifulbirthdaypresentface-downontothetilefloor.Itshattered.Iwasshattered.
Myfirstwatch:giventomeat6.30,smashedby8.15.Icriedandcried.Howcouldlifebesocruel?
Howoftendowebuysomethingnewanddamageitwithinhours?Whenisourfearstrongest?Whensomethingisbrandnew.
Lastmonthmytennisbuddy,Aldo,boughtabrandnewMazdaSUV,andwithinforty-eighthourssomevandalscratchedtheentireleftsidewithakey.Thatsameweekmyfriend,Frank,boughtaHonda.Withintwenty-fourhoursaladyremodelledhisbackbumperinthemallcarpark.
Howoftenhaveyoufoundyourselfinpreciselythesituationthatyoudidn’twant?Yousaidtoyourself,“IfthereisonethingIdon’twanttohappen...ifthereisonequestionIdon’twanttobeasked...ifthereisonemistakethatIdon’twanttorepeat...”andguesswhatyougot?
Weattractwhatwefear.
HellontheHighway
Haveyouhadthisexperience?Youdrivetoworkeverydayforfiveyearswithoutincident.Thenonemorningyoucarelessly
pullinfrontofabusandalmostcauseanaccident.Youareinshock.Breathinghard,feelingvulnerableandstupid,yousaytoyourself,“Thisroadisdangerous!”Youkeepdriving.
Withinfiveminutesatruckswervesintoyourlane.Youavoidit,butonlyjust.Nowyouareinacoldsweat.Tenminuteslaterakidonabikealmostcollectsyourfrontfender.Youhavehadnonear-accidentsinfiveyears–andthenthreenear-missesintwentyminutes!
Everythingyouexperiencecomesaboutbecauseyouarefeelingconfident,nervous,vulnerable,inadequate,excited,loved;youarecreatingyourreality.
Wedon’thaveaccidents;weconstructthem,thoughtbythought–“I’mavictim”,“Ihatethis”,“Thisisdangerous”–andthenoneday,“Whammo”.
Doesthissoundcruel,blunt,scary?Itisphysics,anditisgreatnews.Wouldyouratherbelievethat,regardlessofanythingyouthinkandfeel,youhavenoprotectionfromdiseaseandnodefenceagainstaccidents?
Youaremorethanaphysicalbodywithabrain.Youareamagnet,atransmitter.Whenyouarejoyful,happyandgrateful,yousomehowconnectwithotherpeopleandexperiencesthatmatchyourenergy.It’sthesamewhenyouarefeelingvulnerableorscared.
SeeYourselfProtected
Manypeopleliketoimaginethemselvesasdivinelyprotected.Theymakeitahabit.Whentheyarewalkingthrougharoughneighbourhoodordrivingonthehighway,theywillvisualisethemselvesassurroundedbyaprotectivewhitelight.
WhenIfirstheardaboutthis,Iwondered,“Howwouldthathelpagainstamuggerorarunawaytruck?”NowIunderstand.Thevalueinvisualisingtheprotectivewhitelightisthatitchangeshowyoufeel.Whenyoufeelcalmandprotected,youareprotected.
TheBiblesays,“Resistnotevil.”23Itmeansdon’tfocusonbadstuff.Itmeansdon’tspendyourlifethinkingaboutillnessandcarcrashes.Rather,fillyourmindwiththoughtsofhealthandhappiness.
SomepreacherstellyoutofearGod.Thathastobearecipefordisaster!
InaNutshell
Ifyouthinkaboutwhatyouwant,youattractit.Ifyouthinkaboutwhatyoudon’twant,youattractit.
11.HowimportantIsAction?Youmayask,“Whatismoreimportant?Thoughtsandfeelings?Oraction?”
Lookatitthisway.Whenyoubuildahouse,youcreateasolidfoundationthatnoonesees,andonthatsolidfoundationyouerectwhateveryonesees–thehouse.
Thesameprincipleworksforwhateveryouwanttodo.Ifyouwanttofindawife,writeabest-seller,startacompany,havesurgeryorcyclesafelythroughEurope,youneedasolidfoundation.
YoucreatethatSOLIDFOUNDATIONINYOURIMAGINATIONwithpositivefeelingsofyourgoalhappilyachieved.Onthatinvisiblefoundationyoubuildwhattheworldsees.
Manypeopleforgetthefoundations.Theyareallactionandeffort.Theyracearoundtryingtomakesomethinghappenonnofoundation,andthewallskeepfallingin.
WhyanInvisibleFoundation?
Withoutthefeelingofyourgoalalreadyachieved,youarebroadcastingallkindsoffeelingsofdoubtanduncertainty–feelingslike,“Thismightbehard!WhatifIcan’tdoit?”Thenyouattractexperiencesthatmatchyourfeelings.It’sarecipeforexhaustion.It’sthereasonthatsometalentedpeople–golferswithperfectswingsandsingerswithperfectpitch–settleforflippinghamburgers.
WhenyouhavethefeelingofyourgoalALREADYachieved,youbecomeamagnetfortherightpeople,books,websitesandcoincidences.Doorsopen.Youdon’thavetolayeverybrick
yourself.Itiscalledsynchronicity.
EXAMPLE:Youplanavacation.Yourfoundationisyoubeingexcitedanduplifted,gettingthefeelingofmeetingfascinatingpeople,tastingexoticfood,returninghealthyandrefreshed.Yousetitupinyourmind.Yourthoughtscreatethefeeling.Yourfeelings–andthentheactionyoutake–createtheexperience.
Withoutthefoundation,youarejustaleafinthewind.Anythingmighthappen.
EXAMPLE:Youneedtomakeadifficultphonecall.Yourfoundationisthefeelingofthegoalachieved,thefeelingthatyoumadethatcallandyouwereconfidentandrelaxed.YoucreateitinyourmindFIRST.Thecreationisfun.Thephonecallbecomesabreeze.
Theimaginingisajoy;thedoingbecomesajoy.Thatishowlifeismeanttowork.
ItAllSoundsTooEasy
Let’ssaythatyouhavebeenoutofworkforayear.Youappliedforsixtyjobsandgotsixtyrejections.Youareparalysedwithdisappointment.
Afriendsays,“Readthisbook,HowLifeWorks.”Youreadit.Yousay,“Thisisnuts!AreyousayingthatifIjustfeelgood,ajobwilldropinmylap?”
No.Thisishowitmayhappen.
Rightnow,youhavegivenup.TheideaofyourgettingajobseemsIMPOSSIBLE.Soyoufirstneedtochangehowyoufeel.
Youbegintopictureyourselfasbeinghappilyemployed.Youimagineyourselfexcitedtogotoworkeachday.Youimaginehavingaregularwage–andhowyourlifewillchange.Youwrapyourselfinthesehappyfeelings,fiftytimesaday.
Youbegintoaffirmtoyourself,“IamsogladthatIhaveajob.”
Atfirst,allthisseemsalittleridiculous,butasyoucontinuetoimagineandaffirm,theideaofyourbeingemployedstartstofeellikeaREMOTEPOSSIBILITY.
Nowthatyouarefeelingmoreoptimistic,itiseasiertotakeaction.Yougoonlineandstudywhattosayatajobinterview.Youbuyabook,HowtoGetaJob.YouaskafriendtohelpyourewriteyourCV.
YoustartlookingatPositionsVacantonline.Yousendouttwentyapplicationsandattendtwointerviews.Youdon’tgethired,butyouaremoreconfidentthanbefore.
Afriendofafriendgivesyouthreedaysofpart-timework.Youarefeelingbetteraboutyourself.TheideaofyourhavingajobseemsPOSSIBLE.
Youattendanotherinterview.Thecompanycallsyoutosay,“Youareoneofthefinalcontenders.”
AsBuddhamighthavesaid,“Yourjobisnotintheworld.Yourjobisinyou.”
Anotherguygetsthejob,butyousaytoyourself,“AtleastIambeingtakenseriously.”
AjobnowfeelslikeaPROBABILITY;it’sjustamatterofwhen.Yousendoutanothertwentyapplications.Nineteencompaniesaren’tinterested.Onecompanyinvitesyouforaninterview.Younailit.Thejobisyours.(It’snotover!)
Youworkhardforthenextyear.Youfeelmoreconfident.Soonenough,youarereadyfornewchallenges.
Youapplyforjobsatthreedifferentcompanies.Yougethiredatthethird.(It’smucheasiertogetajobthistime.)
Youworktwoyearsinthenewcompany,andthenoneday,outoftheblue,yougetaphonecall.Arivalcorporationoffersyouaposition.Youhavebeenhead-hunted!Nowthejobsarechasingyou!
Thisishowlifegetsbetter,stepbystep.
Yousay,“Butwhatifthereisaglobalfinancialcrisis?OrwhatifIamsixtyyearsold?”Notallcompaniesparticipateinglobalfinancialcrises.
Notallbosseswantyoungpeople.Whenyouhavetheunshakeableknowingthat“Iamindemand”,lifewillconnectyouwithpeoplewhowantyourservices,regardlessofwhatyoureadinthepapers.AsBuddhamighthavesaid,“Yourjobisnotintheworld.Yourjobisinyou.”
Whetheryouarelookingforworkoralifepartner,whetheryouwanttolose10kilogramsorlearntolikeyourself,youFIRSTbegintochangehowyoufeel.Thenyoutakeaction.Youfeelbetter.Youtakemoreaction.Thisishowyougetfrom
IMPOSSIBLEtoPOSSIBLEtoPROBABLEtoACHIEVED.
InaNutshell
Therearetwopartstotheequation:feelgood+takeaction.TheancientSufiproverbsays;“TrustinAllah,butfirsttieyourcameltoapost.”
WhatWeReallyBelieve
Howdoyouknowwhatsomeonereallybelieves?It’snotinwhattheysay.It’sinwhattheyDO.
Weallknowpeoplewhodreambuttakenoaction.Theydon’tDOanythingbecausetheyexpecttofail.Sotheystaystuck.Youcan’tfooltheUniverse.
Actiondemonstratesbelief.Forexample:
Whenyousavemoneyeveryweek,youconfirmyourbeliefthatadebt-freelifeispossibleWhenyoumakeasalescall,youconfirmyourbeliefthatasaleispossible
Whenyouliftweights,youconfirmyourbeliefthatfitnessispossibleWhenyougivetothepoor,youconfirmyourbeliefthatmoreiscoming.
Actionisthoughtinmotion.
Actionacceleratesresults.
InaNutshell
Fredmaytellyou,“Ideserveabetterlife!”Fredmayannouncetotheworld,“Iwillbesuccessful.”
ButunlessFredistakingaction,hedoesn’treallybelieveit–andnothingwillchange.
Excellence
Yousay,“Whataboutskill?Don’tyouhavetobegoodatwhatyoudo?”Excellenceiscritical.Themostsuccessfulpeopleareveryskilled.
Andfeelinggoodispartoftheprocess.
Whenyoufeeloptimisticandenthusiastic,whenyoucontinuetopictureyourgoalsachievedandwhenyoucontinuetobelieve,thesethingshappen:
YouareconfidentYouattracttherightcolleagues,coaches,mentorsandpartners
YouattractopportunitiesYoujoyfullyrefineyourskills.
TheLawofLeastEffort
TheIndianVedictextsfromaround1500BCexplaintheLawofCauseandEffect(karma),theLawofDetachmentandtheLawofLeastEffort.
TheLawofLeastEffortisperhapsleastunderstood.AsVedicwisdomexplainsit,loveisthefabricthatholdstheUniversetogether.Thismeans:
WhenyouaremotivatedbyLOVEandwhenyouareservingothers,youareinharmonywiththeUniverseandyourplansunfoldwithmuchlesseffort.Smallmiraclesoccurtohelpyouonyourway.WhenyouaremotivatedbyEGO,forexample,ifyouraimistobethemostpowerfulpersonintownorifyourbusinessissellingdodgyusedcarstounsuspectingcustomersorifyouraimistocontrolandimpresspeople,youwillencounterendlessresistance.“Success”willcomeataprice.
Self-helpbooksmaytellus,“Theskyisthelimit.Goanddowhateveryouwant!”butyouwillnoticeapattern:whenourambitionsarelargelyselfish,lifebecomesastruggle.
InaNutshell
Whenwearemotivatedbylove,ittakesLESSACTIONtoproduceMORERESULTS.Theuniversallawsremindusthatweareheretohelpeachother.
12.Resistance
GroundhogDay
Inthemovie,GroundhogDay,PhilConnorsisanangry,resentfulTVweatherman.Eachdaywhenhisalarmsoundsat6amitisFebruary2nd.Heislivingthesameday!
Philtrieseverythingtoescape.Hequitshisjob,hegetsarrested,heattemptssuicidesixtimes–hedrivesoffacliff,leapsoffatallbuilding,walksinfrontofatruck,getsshot,getsfrozenandelectrocuteshimselfinthebath–andwhenhewakesuptomorrow,itisyesterday!
Whenyoufightlife,lifealwayswins.
Eventually,Phillearnstoacceptwhereheis.HestartstofindbeautyintheordinarypeopleinthelittletownofPunxsutawney.
Itisacrazycomedyaboutaguywhoisstuckinatimeloop,re-livingtheworstdayofhislife.Onanotherlevel,ithasadeepmessage.
GroundhogDayisaperfectillustrationofhowresentmentkeepsusstuck,andlovesetsusfree.
It’sNotWhatHappenstoYou…
It’snotWHATHAPPENSTOYOUthatmattersmost.It’sHOWYOUFEELaboutwhathappenstoyou.
EXAMPLE:Let’ssaythatyouareattheairport,waitingtocatchaflight,andtheairlinetellsyou,“Sorry!Mechanicaltrouble.Youwon’tbeleavingforthreehours.”Yougetveryangry.Youtellyourself:“Thisisterrible!I’llmissmyconnectingflight.Thisisadisaster!”
Whileyouremainstressed,thingswillgetworse.Peoplewilltripoveryou,spillcoffeeinyourlapandloseyourbaggage.Whenyoufightlife,lifealwayswins!
Thenfinallyyoucooldown.Youtellyourself,“There’snothingIcandoaboutit.IamprobablywhereIammeanttobe.I’llmakethemostofit.”
Suddenly,everythingchanges!Fromnowhereanoldfriendappears,oryoumakeanewfriend,oryoustumbleonafreshopportunity,andlifebeginstosupportyou.Oncewechangeourthoughtsabout“abadsituation”,wecantakeadvantageofit.
EXAMPLE:Imaginetwowomen,MaryandJane.Bothgetdivorced.Marysays,“I’vefailed.Mylifeisover.”Janesays,“Mylifehasjustbegun!”Whowillblossom?
InaNutshell
Every“disaster”inyourlifeisnotsomuchadisaster,asasituationwaitingforyoutochangeyourmindaboutit.
Crises
Life’sgreatopportunitiesoftenarrivedisguisedasmisfortuneanddisaster.
Whenhaveyoumadethemostimportantdecisionsinyourlife?Isn’titwhenyouwereonyourknees,followingdisastersorknockbacks,andyousaid,“Ineverwanttobethisbrokeanymore,”or“Ineverwanttobeinthiskindofrelationshipanymore.”?
Thegoodthingaboutacrisisisthatwebecometeachable.
Whendoweusuallyfixourdietorstartexercising?Whenourbodyisfallingapart.Whendocouplestelleachotherhowmuchtheyloveeachother?Whentherelationshipisfallingapart.Whendowemakecriticalfinancialdecisions?Whenwecan’tpayourbills.Whendowebackupourcomputers?Afterwehavelosteverything!
Weknowitalluntil:
wehaveaheartattackwegobroketheloveofourlifeleaves.
Thegoodthingaboutacrisisisthatwebecomedesperate–andteachable.
Funny,isn’tit?Wespendourlivestryingtoaccumulatestuff,butwelearnmostwhenweloseit.
InaNutshell
Successwecelebrate.Failurewecontemplate.Welearnmostfrompainanddisappointment.
Pain
Wesufferpainwhenwebelievesomethingthatisnottrue.Forexample,wesufferpainwhenwebelieve:
“IAMMYJOB,”forexample,“Iamateacher,”or“Iama
doctor.”Ifyouthinkyouareyourjob,then,whenyoudon’thaveone,youfeellikeyouhavedisappeared.Whenyouknowyouarenotyourjob,youaren’tshattered,justinconvenienced.“IAMMYBANKBALANCE.”No!Yourself-worthisnotequaltoyournetworth.“IAMMYBODY.”Youhaveone,butyouarenotit.“IAMMYREPUTATION.”No.Yourreputationiswhatotherpeoplethink.Youarenotwhatotherpeoplethink.“IAMHELPLESSANDOUTOFCONTROL.”Absolutelyandentirelywrong!“IAMWORTHLESS.”Wrongagain.Seetherestofthisbook.
InaNutshell
Painisoftenamessagetochangeourthinking.
Death
Whenwethinkthatlifeshouldbeacertainway–anditisn’t–ithurts.Onereasonwhypeoplethinklifeisunfairisbecausetheythinkdeathisunfair.Peoplewhobelievelifeisterribleoftenbelievedeathisterrible.
Theideathatdeathisterriblestemsfrombeliefslike:
everyoneshouldliveatleast75years,andanylessisatragedydeathistheendofit.
Butisyourdeaththeendofyou?
Itendtotakenoticeofexperts.Whenpeoplededicatetheirlivestomakingmoviesormanagingcorporationsorperformingheartsurgery,IfiguretheyknowsomethingIdon’t.
Here’swhatInoticeaboutthosejoyouspeoplewhohavededicatedthemselvestoaspirituallife:theyallsayroughlythesamething.
YouareaneternalspiritinabodyLifeiswonderfulYoucameheretoexperiencejoyandrealiseyourtruepowerTherearenoaccidents;weleavethisplanetwhenwearereadyDon’tbesoserious!
Ifyoutrytofigurethisalloutintellectually,itprobablydoesn’tmakesense.Ifyoujustliveit,itworksbeautifully.
HowMuchTimeDoYouNeed?
Itmayseemreasonablethatweshouldallgetatleast75yearsonEarth,butthefactis,wedon’t.Somelivesareshort.Humanityisaboutvariety.Weeachthinkdifferently,livedifferently.NotallguyslooklikeBradPitt.
Asheartbreakingasitistoloselovedonesunexpectedly,itseemsthatsomepeopledotheirthingquicklyandmoveon.Somebeautiful,angelic,four-year-oldscomeforjustabriefvisit.
Somepeopleevolvequickly.Somehangonfor95years.
InaNutshell
Weareeachadivine,loving,powerfulspiritinabody.Whenweforgetthis,lifehurts.Itislife’swayofgettingusbackontrack.
Whenyoustoptryingtosellit,everyonewantstobuyit!
13.LetGo!Myfriend,Caroline,hasspentherlifemanagingexotichotelsaroundtheworld–islandgetawaysontheGreatBarrierReef,elephantsanctuaryresortsinnorthernThailand,breathtakingpropertiesonSydneyHarbourandevenahotel-that-used-to-be-a-palaceintheHimalayas.
Here’swhatfascinatesmeaboutCaroline.Shehasspentherlifemanagingluxurioushotelsandyetshehas:
notraininginhospitalityorhotelmanagementneverhadaCVneverbeenoutofwork.
Carolinerecentlyretiredafterherfourteenthmanagementpositioninthirtyyears,noneofwhichsheappliedfor.It’snotluck.
WhyisCarolinesuchamagnetforopportunity?Shehasabsolutelynofearofbeingunemployed.Sheistotallydetached.Herexperienceintheworkplaceisdifferentfrommostpeople’sbecauseherthinkingisdifferentfrommostpeople’s.
Shesays,“It’scrazy.I’mnotagreatmanager,butthesejobsjusthappen.Iliveinblindtrust.Iknowthattherightjobwillalwayscomeattherighttime.”
ChasingGirlfriends,ChasingDogs
TheBuddhiststeachdetachment.Youknowaboutit.Whenwechasegirlfriends,boyfriends,evendogs,theyrunaway.Why?Becausewearechasingthem!Whenwetrytotrappeopleinrelationships,theycan’t
waittoescape!WhenweLETGO,theyoftencomeback!
Didyoueverspendweekssearchingforanapartmentbutfoundnothingyouliked?Afterendlessfrustrationyouquitlooking–andthat’swhenyoufoundyournewhome.Assoonasyousignedthelease,youdiscoveredthreemoreperfectapartmentswithoutevenlooking!
Didyoueverwanttosellsomething–astroller,alaptop,aparachute?Nobodywantedit,andsoyougaveitaway.Whenyoustoppedtryingtosellit,everyonewantedtobuyit.
WetalkedaboutlackthoughtsinChapter8.DesperationandLACKTHOUGHTSarepartofthesamemindset.Ifwecan’tfindanapartment,orajoboraplaneticket–andwebecomedesperate–wecontinuecreatingthesamelackexperience.
Oncewegetthejob,theapartmentortheboyfriend,ourthinkingshiftsfrom“Ineedthis”to“IhavewhatIneed”.“IhavewhatIneed”isatotallydifferentvibration.“IhavewhatIneed”isyourmostpowerfulstate.“IhavewhatIneed”isthestartingpointforamucheasierlife.
Fredsays,“Butyoudon’tgetit!Idon’thavewhatIneed!WhenIhavewhatIneed,thenI’llbegrateful;thenI’llbehappy.”Perfectlyunderstandable,Fred,buttheresultsofthisapproacharealwaysdisappointing.
InaNutshell
Thetricktothegameoflifeistofeelhappy,gratefulanddetached.
Detachment
Detachmentisnotdisinterest.Itispossibletobedetachedandstillbeverydetermined.Peoplewhoaredetachedanddeterminedknowthateffortandexcellenceareultimatelyrewarded.Theysay:“IfIdon’twinthistime,I’llwinthenexttime,orthetimeafterthat.”
Let’ssayyouapplyforapositionatLoonyLarry’sLaptops.Youareexcitedaboutthejobandyoupreparecarefully.Youwriteoutyourinterviewspeechandyoupractiseitinfrontofthebathroommirror.Youevengetahaircut.Youarriveearlyfortheinterviewandyougiveityourbestshot.
Whatnext?Yougetonwithyourlife.Youenrolinextrastudy.Youplanyournextjobapplication.IfyougethiredbyLoonyLarry,you’rehappy.Ifnot,youarestillmovingforward.
Disinterestedpeoplesay:“Whocares,andwhybother?”
Desperatepeoplesay:“IfIdon’tgetthisI’lldie!”
Whenyouaredeterminedanddetached,yousay:“Onewayoranother,Iwillgetagoodjob–andIdon’tcarehowlongittakes.”
Lifedoesn’thavetobeanendlessstruggle.
Naturedoesn’tunderstanddesperation!Natureseeksbalance,andyoucan’tbedesperateandbalanced.
Lifedoesn’thavetobeanendlessstruggle.Letthingsflow.Thisisnotindifference;it’snotforcingthings.
InaNutshell
There’ssuchathingastryingtoohard!
Giving
Churchestellusweshouldgive,buttheydon’texplainwhygivingissomagical.ThesecrettolifeishowweFEEL.Fewthingsmakeusfeellighterandhappierthangivingsomeoneapresent,acomplimentorahelpinghand.Whenwegivehappily,wefeelwonderful.
Whenwefeelwonderful,webecomeamagnetforgoodthings.SoWHENWEGIVE,WECREATEAFLOW.Itisthatsimple.Nooneeverexplainedthistome!
Here’saprinciplewhichseemstomakenosense:whateveritisthatyoumostwant,shareit.Givefreely,wantingnothinginreturn.Ifyouwantmoney,sharesomeofyours.Ifyouwantlove,shareyours.It’showyoucreateaflow.
TakeMarywhoisdesperatetobeloved.Maryisangrywithherhusband,Fred.Shesays,“IdosomuchforFredbuthedoesn’tlovemeback!”MarydoesdoalotforFred–butsheisn’tlovinghim.Sheiscountingeverythingshedoes.Andsheiskeepingscore:Mary,10;Fred,2.
Whenyouaresimplylovingpeoplewithnostringsattached,lovecomesback.Ithasto.Italwayswill.
GiveHappily
ItmattersHOWwegive.Ifwegivebegrudgingly,wefeelbad.Whenwefeelbad,wedon’treceiveabundance.Thatiswhyitispowerfultogiveanonymously.
Hereisafungame:sendafriendabirthdaycardwithfiftydollarsinit–butdon’tsignthecard.Thegameistoneverletthemknowyousentit.
Yourfriendwillbedelightedandintriguedthatmoneyjustcamefromnowhere.It’salsoajoyforyou.
Andhere’sthebigbenefit:yougettopractisegivingwithoutneedingthanks.Yougettopractisenotcaringwhetherpeopleexpressappreciationornot.Andwhenyoudon’tNEEDgratitudeandappreciation?Yougetmoreofit.
InaNutshell
It’snotwhatyougive;it’showyougive.
FindingYourLife’sPurpose
TheSanskritwordforyourpurposeinlifeis“dharma”.AccordingtotheLawofDharma,weeachhaveuniquetalentsthatweareheretodiscover.Whenweexpressthosetalents,wefindjoy.
Accordingtothelaw,wearemostlikelytodiscoverthosetalentswhenweask,“WhatcanIgive?”ratherthan,“WhatcanIgetback?”
14.WhenEverythingIsGoingWrong
Rocky
Rockyisanangryyoungstreetfighter.Hehangsaroundclubsandbars.Almosteveryweekhegetsintoastreetbrawl,andhehasthescarsandthebrokenteethtoproveit.
ThenRockyhasabrainwave:“I’lllearnkarate.ThenIcanbeatupthreepeopleatonce.”
SoRockyenrollsinagym.Rockylovesit,butthemastertellshim,“Youaretooangry!Youcan’tfightwhenyou’reangry.”
Rockysays,“That’showIam–ANGRY!”
ButRockynoticesthathekeepsgettingthrashedatthegymbyoldguyswhoarehalfhissize.Eventually,helearnssomerelaxationexercises.Ithelps.Hegetsquicker,hisanticipationimproves,buthedoesn’tknowwhy.Hedoesn’trealisethatheisstartingtoharnesshissubconsciousmind.
RockyhasseenthoseguysonYouTubewhobreakbrickswiththeirhandsandsmashconcretewiththeirheads.Rockythinks,“Iwanttosmashsomeconcrete!”Heasksthemaster,“Howdoyoudothat?”Themastersays,“Youdoitwithchi.”
“What’schi?”
“Chi,”saysthemaster,“istheenergyoftheUniverse.YouhavetobecomeachannelforthepoweroftheUniverse.Youneedtolearntomeditate.”Rockylaughs.“Chi?That’scrap.”
Rockygoeshomeandputsabrickonhiscoffeetable.Hetriestosmashitwithhisforeheadandspendstheweekendinhospital.
Rockyispuzzled.Howcomeskinnylittlesixty-year-oldguyscanshatterlumpsofconcrete?AndhowcouldBruceLeeknockaguyacrosstheroomwithhisone-inchpunch!
Rockyreallywantstosmashthings.Sohelearnstomeditate.Rockylearnstofocushisenergy.Hediscoversthatthinkingdoesn’thelp;rather,youexpressyourintentionandthenyouhavetogetyourmindoutoftheway.Andsohelearnstobreakstuff–andit’sweird;ashediscovershispower,hebecomesmorehumble.
Rockynoticessomethingelse:ashebecomesmorerelaxed,hefindsmorepeaceofmind.Forthefirsttimeinhislifehebeginstolikehimself.Rockydiscoversthatpeoplelikehim,andhelikespeople.Hemakessomefriends.OnedayitdawnsonRocky,“Idon’tgetintostreetfightsanymore.”
Rockyhelpsotherangryyoungkids.Heunderstandsthosekids.Infact,helovesthem.Oftenhe’lltellthem,“Iusedtobelikeyou.”
AndonedayRockyhearshimselfexplainingtoayoungteen,“Youdon’thavetoimpressanybody.Youaren’theretoteachanyonealesson.Youareheretolearnaboutyourself.Relax.StayinthemomentandyoubecomeachannelfortheenergyoftheUniverse.”
Rockyexplains,“Asyoulearnhowtofight,soyoulearnaboutyourself.Whenyouhavemasteredyourself,thereisnoonelefttofight.”
Andthekidsays,“That’scrap.”
Life-changingrelationshipsandopportunitiesappearwhenweleastexpectthem.
InaNutshell
Sometimesyoucangetintosomething–ajob,amarriageorthescienceofhowtobeatupotherpeople–forallthewrongreasons,andemergewithalltherightanswers.
“Thisisadisaster!”
WhenIfirstlearnedabouttheLawofAttractionIwassingle.Ibegantoimaginemyperfectwife:beautiful,smart,funny,feminineandnottootall.Acoupleofyearswentby.Ikeptvisualisingher,butshestillhadn’tshownup.Ibegantowonder,“Howlongdoesthistake?Whereisshe?”
AtthattimeIwasrunningweekendseminars.Ihadrent,wages,advertisingcosts,electricalbills,printingandpostagecosts.Ineededeighteenpeopleinaseminartopaymybills.Mycoursesaveragedaboutthirtypeople,andsoIwasdoingokay.ThenoneNovember,Ijustcouldn’tgetthenumbers–andeventhepeoplewhohadbookedwerealldroppingout.
SoonIwasdowntotwelve.NomatterwhatIdid,Ijustcouldn’tfilltheroom.Ithought,“Thisisadisaster!”Eventually,Ihadtotellmyself,“Youhavedoneallthatyoucan.Whateverhappens,happens.”Istoppedstruggling.InmymindIstoppedcomplaining.Iletgo.
Andintothatseminaroftwelvepeoplewalkedthewomanofmydreams.Thatwas1986.Wemarried
in1991.
Julieismyinspiration.Sheisthesmartest,mostelegant,mostgenerous,mostcourageous,mostextraordinarywomanIevermet–all150cmofher.
Thisismyexperience:life-changingrelationshipsandopportunitiesappearwhenweleastexpectthem.Itislife’swayofsaying,“Neverunderestimatethepresentmoment.”
InaNutshell
Whenwethinkeverythingisgoingwrong,itusuallyisn’t.Wejustcan’tseethewholepicture.
YourRadarScreen
Ourconsciousmindislikeatinyradarscreenthatseesjustafractionofwhatisgoingonaroundus.
Wearealwayssurroundedbypeople,eventsandpossibilitiesapproachingusthatwecan’tseeontheradar.Becausewecan’tseethemwithourphysicalsenses,wethinktheyaren’tthere.
Buttheyarethere.Andeverytimeyouhaveapositivefeelingaboutloveormoneyorahappylife,whatyoufeelgoodaboutmovescloser.ButitisonlyattheveryENDofthecreationprocessthatwhatyouarefeelingappearsonyourscreen.
Peoplewhostruggleandsufferandcomplainbelievethattheradarscreenisallthereis.Butourradarscreenispickingup
justthetiniestcornerofourUniverse.
Juliewasalwaysoutthereandalwaysgettingcloser.Itjusttookmetwoyearstogetherontomyradar.
InaNutshell
Allthosethingsthatyouhavebeenfeelingexcitedaboutarestillmovingtowardyou.Youjustneedtokeepthefeelinguntilyoulandthemonyourscreen.
GowiththeFlow
Lifeislikeridingastream.Somepeoplespendtheirlifeswimmingagainstthecurrent.Somepeoplethrashaboutinapermanentpanic.Somepeopleneverjumpin.
Itiseasiertogowiththeflow.Themoreflexibleyouare,thebetteryoufeelandthebetterlifeworks.
Moneywillsometimesbetightandsometimesbeplentiful.Peoplewillsometimespromisemorethantheydeliver.Youwillhavedayswhenitseemseverythingisgoingwrong.
Onthosetoughdays,asoneveryday,affirmtoyourself,“Everythingwillworkoutfine!”
InaNutshell
Youcannotcontroleverything.
Youdon’thavetocontroleverything.
Youdon’thavetoknowHOW
thingswillworkout.
Energyflowsintoyourbeingeverytimeyousay,“ThisisaGREATMOMENT!”
15.Acceptance
WhereEnergyComesfrom
Imaginethis:youdidn’tsleeplastnight.Youwereupat4amandyouhadalongdayattheoffice.Youfoughtthebossandyoufoughtthetraffic.It’snow6pmandyouarehome,collapsedonthesofa,tootiredtoshowerandtootiredtoeat.
Yourphonerings,andit’saveryofficial-soundinglady.Sheverifiesyournameandaddressandsays,“Wehavebeentryingtocontactyouallday.Congratulations!Youarethewinnerofthestatelottery–thesumoftwentymilliondollars.”
Youleapthreefeetintheair.“Twentymillion!We’reRICH!”
Youraceupanddownthestairstofindthefamily.Youcallyourmother,yourbrother,allyourfriendsandneighbours.“Getoverhere!Let’sparty!”
QUESTION:Wheredidyougetalltheenergyfrom?Ithadtocomefromsomewhere!
Yousay,“It’sthemoney!”Butit’snotthemoney.Youhaven’tevengotityet.Anditcouldbeahoax.
Here’swheretheenergycamefrom:energyflowsintoyourbeingeverytimeyousay,“THISISAGREATMOMENT!”Itishowlifeworks.Itisthecosmicdifferencebetween“Oh,YES!”and“Oh,no!”
It’swhythree-year-oldsareunstoppable.Tothree-year-olds,everythingisfreshandexciting.Theyareenergychannels.Ifyoucouldgetathree-year-oldtoworryabout
mortgagesandmedicalbills,hewouldbeastiredashisgrandparents.
Blockages
TheChineseunderstandenergy.Chinesemedicineexplainswhy,whenyougetangrywithyourboyfriend,yougetaragingheadache.Youtenseupinyourneckandshoulders,youchokeofftheenergyflowinyour“meridians”andyougetapaininyourhead.
Wheneverweresistasituation,wheneverwesay,“Thisisnotokay,”weblockenergyflow.
Massageoracupunctureremovestheblockage.(Sodoesforgivingyourboyfriend.)Yourelax,theenergyflowsandthereisnomoreheadache.
Weareallchannels–wechannelenergyandinspiration.Theword,“enthusiasm”,comesfromtheLatin,“enthusiasmus”,meaningdivineinspiration,possessedbyagod.Whenweareenthusiastic,wehavelifeforceflowingthroughusandweareconnectedtoeverything.Buteverytimewesay,“Thisisabadmoment!”,everytimewefindfault,everytimewejudgepeopleandevents,weclogourchannel.
Whenelectricitycan’ttraveldownawireorpastapieceofplastictape,wesaythereis“resistance”.Whenthereisenoughresistance,electricalenergystopsflowingaltogether.
It’sthesamewithyou.Whenenergycan’tflowintoyou,it’sduetoablockage,orresistance.Howdowerecogniseresistance?Itsoundssomethinglikethis:
“Ihatethistraffic.”“Ihatemyjob.”
“I’malwaysbroke.”“Imightgetsick!”“Ishouldhavemarriedhersister!”
SavingEnergy
Youcan’tsaveupyourenergylikemoneyinabank.Thelessyoulove,thelessloveflowsthroughyou.Thelessenergyyouspend,thelessenergyflowsthroughyou.
Miseryandapathyshutoffyourenergy.Thatiswhydepressedpeoplearemostlyexhausted.Passionforlifeandpeoplerestorestheflow.
HowtoStayStuck
Here’showtostaystuckinanyjob,situationorrelationship:lookforthingsthatarewrong.
Themorereasonsyoucanfindtobedisappointedorresentful,themoreresistanceyoucreate,andthemoreslowlyyourlifewillmove.Youarenotbeingpunished;youaresimplychokingoffyourlifeforce.
Yousay,“DoIneedtobemoretolerant?”No!Toleranceisresistance:it’ssimplymorepolite.“Idon’tlikethis,butI’msufferinginsilence!”
Weneedtomovefromtoleranceto…
Acceptance
TodayIwilljudgenothingthatoccurs.24
ACourseinMiracles
Perhapsyouarebrokerightnow.Perhapsyouhavelostyourjoborlostalovedone.Maybeyouaresick.Yousay,“Ijustdon’tknowwhattodo.”
Hereisthefirstthingtodo:acceptwhereyouare.Toturnthingsaround,youfirstmakepeacewithyoursituation.Forgetaboutblame,forgetaboutguilt,forgetthe“whatifs”.Progressdependsonacceptance.
Acceptancedoesn’tmean,“Iwanttostayhere.”Acceptancemeans,“ThisiswhereIam–andnowImoveontowhatI
want.”
Insteadof,“MymarriageisamessandI’mangryandresentful,”itismorelike,“Mymarriageisamess.Whataperfectlearningexperience!Nowmylifecanbegintogetbetter.”
Acceptanceisn’tgivingup.Acceptanceisrecognitionthat“Thisisapartofmyjourney”.Veryoftenitmeans,“RightnowIhavenoideawhythishadtobeapartofmyjourney,butIembraceitanyway.”“Ineededtobehere”doesn’tmean“Ineedtostayhere.”
InaNutshell
Logicwilltellyou,“IfIacceptthisrottenmomentIwillbestuckwithitforever!”Infact,thereverseistrue.Acceptanceallowsyoutomoveon.
HowDoIPracticeAcceptance?
Doyouwanttoprovetoyourselfthatpositivethinkingworks?
Trythis:everymorningwhenyouwakeup,say“Thisisperfect.WhereIamisperfect.Allmymistakesareperfect.Mylifeuntilnowistheperfectpreparationtograduatetosomethingbetter.”
Doestheword,“perfect”,seemtooextreme?Thentryusingtheword,“okay”.Wheneverthingsseemtogowrong–youmissaflight,youloseyourhousekeys,youmissoutonapromotion–tellyourself,“Idon’tknowwhy,butthisisokay!”Andthenlookforreasonstobehappynow.
Whatwillhappen?Yourenergywillchangeandyourlifewill
“Ineededtobehere”doesn’tmean“Ineedtostayhere.”
change.
WhathappenswhenyouacceptwhatIS?Frustrationdissolvesintofascination.Youstillhavechallenges,buttheyresolvethemselvesalmosteffortlessly.Youargueless,youquittryingtomakeotherpeoplewrong,youquitcomplaining.Youlookfor
goodthings,andasyoulookforgoodthings,lifeheapsmoregoodthingsuponyou.Friends,loversandopportunitiesappearalmostmagically.YougetthefeelingthattheUniverseisplottingtomakeyouhappy.“Ineededtobehere”doesn’tmean“Ineedtostayhere.”
Tohaveabeautifullife,youdon’thavetoknoweverythingabouteverythingandyoudon’tevenhavetobeverysmart!Itismoreaboutacceptingwhereyouare,seeingthebestinpeopleandbelievinglifewillturnoutwell.
InaNutshell
Acceptanceispower.
Toforgivepeopleyoudon’thaveto
16.ForgivenessWheredowegettheideathatifWEdon’tforgivepeople,THEYsuffer?It’snuts!
Let’ssay:
a)youaremybossandyougivemethesack;orb)youaremygirlandyourunoffwithmybestfriend.
SoIsay,“I’llneverforgiveyouforthat!”Whosuffers?Notyou!I’mpacingthefloor.I’vegottheheadachesandtheindigestion.I’mlosingsleep.Youareprobablyoutpartying!
IfIdon’tforgiveyou,itruinsMYlife!
Isforgivenesseasy?Usuallynot.Itishardtoforgivepeoplebecausewhenwetrytoforgive,wefocusonwhat“theydid”.Sowekeepgettingmoreandmoreangry!
Sohere’sathoughtthatmaybehelpful:don’tevenTRYtoforgivepeople.Justlookfortheirgoodqualities,lookforthingstoappreciateinthem.Ifyoucanfindonequalityandconcentrateonthat,soonerorlateryouwillfindsomethingelsetoappreciate,andsomethingelse.Andasyouseemoreandmoregoodthings,yourrelationshipwillheal.
Asyourrelationshipheals,thepastwilltakecareofitself.
Toforgivepeople,youdon’thavetoagree
agreewithwhattheydid.
withwhattheydid.Youjusthavetowantyourlifetowork.
InaNutshell
Youdon’tforgivepeoplefortheirbenefit.
Youdoitforyourbenefit.
Andthere’smoretoit…
ItTakesTwo
IfIbelievethat:
lifeisunfaireverybodyisacheatallbossesarebullies
Iwillattractexperiencesthatprovemybeliefsystem.Peoplewillappearinmylifetoemptymybankaccount,breakmynoseorleavemestrandedatthealtar.Mylow-qualitythoughtswilldeliverlow-qualityexperiences.
DoIwanttheunhappyexperiences?No.
DoIchoosethoseexactexperiences?No.
ButbythequalityofmyfeelingsIdeterminetheQUALITYofmyexperiences.
Soif,forexample,Jimcomesalongandsmacksmeinthemouth,JimissimplyaperfectmatchforhowIfeelaboutmyselfatthemoment.Ifitwasn’tJim,thenitwouldhavebeenaneighbouroraperfectstrangerwhobeltedme.
ITISNOTABOUTJIM.Icreatedthe“window”forasmackinthemouth.Onepersonwhoisfeelingbadabouthimselfattractsanotherpersonwhofeelslikethumpingsomeone.Perfect!
SodoesitmakesensetoblameJimifIcreatedtheconditionsforJimtothumpme?Andtheansweris,“No.”
Atthispointyoumightsay,“Wait!Thisisridiculous!Whatkindofidiotwouldsay,‘Neverblameotherpeople?’.”
Andtheansweris:EVERYSPIRITUALMASTERWHOEVERLIVEDbecausetheyunderstandhowlifeworks.
“Stopbeatingyourselfup.”
PeopleappeartoberuiningyourlifeaslongasyoubelievetheyareruiningyourlifeYouarecreatingyourlifeexperience.
Yourbeliefskeepyoustuckrightwhereyouare.
InaNutshell
Youdon’tforgivepeoplebecauseit’sholyorspiritual.YouforgivepeoplebecauseitisPRACTICAL.ResentingpeoplekeepsyouSTUCK.Forgivenesssetsyoufree.Andthere’smore…
ForgiveYourself!
Itisnototherpeoplethatweblamethemost–itisourselves.
Mostofushadparentswhodidn’tfeelgoodaboutthemselves.Sotheyfoundfaultwithus.Sowegrewupbelieving:
“Iamstupid”“I’mtoofat,skinny,ugly,short…”
“Ineedtoprovemyself.”
WealsohavethatVoiceinourhead–theInnerCritic.TheInnerCriticisaninvisiblebully,foreverstalkingus,tearingusdown.
“You’renotsmartenough,you’renotloveable,you’renotbeautiful.”“Youneedtomakemoremoney,getmorestuff,winmoretrophies,bemoreimpressive.”“Youshouldbemorelikeyourbrother,sister,father,neighbour.”
SilencingtheInnerCritic
Youask,“SohowdoIsilencemyInnerCritic?”
Forthelastfiftyyears,psychologistsandtherapistshavetoldus,“Raiseyourself-esteem!Whenyoufeelbetteraboutyourself,theCriticwillleaveyoualone.”
Buthere’stheproblem:wetrytoraiseourself-esteembycomparingourselveswithotherpeople.Wetellourselves:
“I’mokaybecauseI’mthinnerthanher.”“I’mokaybecauseIgotapromotion,wonatrophy,driveanAudi.”“I’mokaybecauseI’maboveaverage.”
Butweallcan’tbeaboveaverage!Andwecan’tbeaboveaverageateverything.
Self-esteemworkswheneverythingisgoingwell.Buthowdoyoumaintainagoodself-imagewhenyoujustgotsackedordivorced–orwhenyouarebattlingaddiction?It’sliketryingtorunamarathonwithabrokenleg.
“Ineedtomakemoremoney,winmoretrophies,proveI’m
Self-compassion
Manyexpertsnowrecommendanotherway.It’scalledself-compassion–wherewequitthrashingourselvesandquitcomparingourselveswithotherpeople.
Withself-compassion,westopaskingquestionslike,“HowamIdifferent?HowamIbetter?”Webeginaskingthequestion,“HowamIthesameaseveryoneelse?”
Wegiveourselvespermissiontobeimperfect.Wetaketimetonoticewhenwearehurting.Interestingly,thelesswecriticiseourselves,themoreeffectivewebecome.Thelesswecompetewithpeople,themoreweconnectwithpeople.
Howdoesself-compassionhelp?Here’sthecrunch:
IfICRITICISEmyselfIfeelbad.WhenIfeelbad,lifebeatsuponme:Igetjilted,cheated,exploitedandexhausted.
right…”IfIACCEPTmyself,Ifeelgood.WhenIfeelgood,Igetlovedandappreciated.Igetopportunities.Thingsworkout.
Therearemanyhelpfulbooksandwebsitesaboutpractisingself-compassion,includingwww.compassionfocusedtherapy.com.auandwww.self-compassion.org.
TheSecrettoFeelingLoved
SocialogistBrenéBrown,PhD25,spenttenyearsstudyingpeoplewhofeellovedandpeoplewhofeelunloved.Sowhatisthedifference?Arelovedpeoplemorebeautiful,moreintelligentormoretrendy?Dounlovedpeoplemakemoreblunders?No.
Here’swhatBrowndiscovered:PEOPLEWHOFEELLOVEDBELIEVETHEYDESERVETOBELOVED.Itisthatsimple.
Ifyouhavemadestupidmistakes,guiltwon’tfixthem.Ifyouareimperfect,jointheclub.Ifyouwanttofeelloved,forgiveyourselffornotbeingperfect.
ThereisOnlyOneRelationship
Yourrelationshipsarenotaboutyourboss,yourgirlfriend,yourfamilyandfriends.YourhappinessisnotdependentonTHEM.Thereisonlyonerelationshipthatmatters,andthatishowyoufeelaboutyou.Therestaremirrors.
Nooneeverhadahitrecord,wonatournament,orkeptajoborafriendshipwhodidn’tbelievetheydeservedit.Noonewaseverlovedforalifetimewhodidn’tbelievetheywereworthyof
love.
InaNutshell
TheproblemisnotthatGodjudgesyou;theproblemisthatyoujudgeyou.
17.YourMiraculousBodyIfyougiveanygroupofpatientsasimplesugarpilltocureasthma,depressionoranallergy,about33%willreportimprovementoracure.Medicinecallsthistheplaceboeffect.
Yousay,“Okay,placebosmightworkforthingsthatareinthemind–likedepression–butwhataboutREALproblems?Whataboutsomethingphysicallikeosteoarthritis?”
FakeSurgery
Orthopedicsurgeon,DrBruceMoseley,wastheleadauthorofaBaylorSchoolofMedicinestudy26thatsetouttodeterminewhichoftwocommonsurgicalproceduresgavegreaterrelieftopatientssufferingfromseverekneepain.
Therewere180patientsinthestudy,dividedintothreegroupsof60:
GroupAgotsurgery:MoseleyshavedthedamagedcartilageofthekneeGroupBgotsurgery:Moseleyflushedoutthedamagedkneejoint,andremovedanymaterialthatmightbecausingthepainGroupPlacebogotfakesurgery.Moseleymadethreeincisionsintheskin,pretendedtooperateandthenseweduptheincisionsafterfortyminutes.
GroupPlacebowereallowedtobelievetheyhadhadrealsurgeryfortwoyearsbeforetheywerefinallytold,“Wetrickedyou.Youhadnosurgery!”
Andtheresults?
GroupsAandBthathadtherealsurgeryimprovedasexpected.ForGroupPlacebothathadNOsurgery,theirimprovementwasEQUALtothosewhohadsurgery.Onememberoftheplacebogroup,TimPerez,hadbeenrestrictedtowalkingwithacane.Followingthefakesurgery,hewasabletoplaybasketballwithhisgrandchildren.
DrMoseleyobserves,“Thebiggerthetreatmentthepatientthinksthey’regoingtohave,thebiggertheplaceboeffect,andingeneralsmallpillsdon’thaveasbigofaplaceboeffectasbiggerpills,andpillsdon’thaveasbigofaneffectasshots,andshotsdon’thaveasbigofaneffectasprocedures...”27Thepowerofbelief!
Thisshouldn’tsurpriseus.Thefirstplacebotrialwasconductedin1801andmedicalresearchhascontinuedtodemonstratethesamephenomenaeversince.
Howcanthisbe?Here’swhatwedoknowforsure:whetheryourulcerheals,whetheryoucureyourdepressionorwhetherthearthriticpaininyourkneedisappearsdependsmuchonwhatyoubelieve.Thisraisessomequestions.
Ifplacebosworkforathirdofpatients,whydon’ttheyworkforallpatients?
Perhapsitisbecauserealdrugsdon’tworkforallpatients,either.Beliefispartoftheequationandsomepatientsdon’tbelievetheycanbecured.Andstrangeasitmaysound,somepatientsdon’twanttobecured.
Whydoplaceboswork?
Asugartabletoranimaginaryoperationgivesyouexpectation
andhope,andwhenyouhavebeliefyourenergychanges.Whenyoufeelbetter,youhealbetter.
Whenpeoplediscoverthataplacebohelpedtheirbodiesheal,theyareusuallyembarrassed,asiftosay,“Asugarpillmademebetter!Itwasallinmymind.AmIcrazy?”
Whatweshouldsayis,“Asugarpillmademebetter.Iammiraculous!”
Howcanthemindinfluencethecellsofthebodytoeffectacurewhenwedon’tevenknowwhatourbodyneedstodotofixtheproblem?
That’sjustit.Youneverhavehadaclueabouthowyourbodyworks.Whenyoucutyourfinger,doyouhavetothinkaboutmakingascab,creatingscartissue,mendingandgrowingcapillaries?Whenyoueatapizza,doyouhavetoconcentrateondigestingthatlastanchovy?Whatdoyouknowaboutreplacingyourentirestomachlining(whichhappenseverytwodays)orproducingbileorgrowingfingernails?
Rightnowthecellsinyourbodyaredigesting,breathing,expellingwaste,makingproteins,replicatingyourDNA,watchingoutfortoxinsandpredators,sendingmessages.Thereare100,000chemicalreactionshappeninginEACHcellofyourbodyeverysecond.
Yourgenesarenotlikesometimebombwaitingtoexplode.
Eachcellislikeanentireuniverse.Injustonecellinyournostril,yourliveroryourrectum,thereare6trillionthingshappeningeverysecond.
Youhave50trillioncellsinyourbody;sothat’s300,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000thingshappeninginyourbodyeverysecond.Andhowmuchdoyouknowaboutit?
Itisyoursubconsciousmindthattakescareofit.YouareaPASSENGER.
ButIt’sMyGenes!
Yousay,“Okay,buttheremustbealimittowhatthemindcando.Isn’tourhealthdeterminedbyourgenes?”
Inthe1960s,longbeforemostofushadevenheardofgenetics,DrBruceLiptonwasalreadycloningstemcellsandstudyingDNA.Inhisbest-sellingbook,TheBiologyofBelief,28Liptondrawsonalmostfiftyyearsofresearchtoexplainthatwehavegoneoverboardinassumingthatourlifeisdeterminedbyourgenes.
SaysDrLipton,yourgenesareonlyablueprintforwhatMIGHThappen.Ablueprintisaplan,apossibility.Forexample,ifyouhaveablueprinttobuildabookshelf,andyouleavetheblueprintinyourbriefcase,thebookshelfnevergetsbuilt.Theblueprintcan’tbuildthebookshelf.Thenecessary
environmenttobuildabookshelfincludesyouandascrewdriver.
Itisthesamewithyourgenes.Yourgenesarenotlikesometimebombwaitingtoexplode.Howyourgenesbehavedependsontheenvironment.SomethinghastoswitchyourDNAonoroff.WhatswitchesDNAonoroffistheenvironmentthatyoucreatewithyourlifestyleandyourthoughts–atthequantumlevelatwhichmatterappearsanddisappears.
DrLiptonreferstotheworkofeminentscientistandphysician,DeanOrmish.SaysLipton,“Ormishrevealedthatbyjustchangingdietandlifestylefor90days,prostatecancerpatientsswitchedtheactivityofover500genes.”29
Liptoncontinues,“Somepeoplecomeherewithdefectivegenesandwiththeirmindtheycanrewritethosegenesandmakethemnormal.”
Heexplains,“Wedonothavetogothroughthefateofourgenesbecausewearemastersofourgenes.Wearenotvictimsunlessourbeliefsystemsaysweare.”
That’swhyDrLiptonnamedhisbook,TheBiologyofBelief.
Emotion
Traditionally,scientistsdon’tacknowledgefuzzythingslikeemotions,butthisischanging.
Renownedpharmacologist,CandacePertPhD,hasspentdecadesstudyingwhywefeelthewaywefeel.
Perthaspublishedover250scientificpapers.Sowhatdoesahard-nosedlaboratoryscientisthavetosayabouthowemotionsinteractwiththe“real”world?Andhowimportantareour
feelings?SaysPert:
Wecannolongerthinkoftheemotionsashavinglessvaliditythanmaterial,physicalsubstancebutinsteadwemustseethemascellularsignalsthatareinvolvedintheprocessoftranslatinginformationintophysicalreality,literallytransformingmindintomatter.30
JustasEinsteinandquantumphysicsdemonstratedthatallmatterisenergy,Pertsuggeststhatallenergyisinformation.ThisisausefulwaytopictureyourbodyandtherestoftheUniverse.
InaNutshell
WesternmedicineisstartingtoembracewhatEasternmedicinehasknownfor6,000years.
NegativethoughtsaretoxicWellnessanddiseasebegininthemind.
18.YourHeartHowoftenwetalkaboutourhearts!Wesaysomeonehasabigheart,alightheart,aheavyheart,ahardheart,asoftheart,ablackheart,achangeofheart,abrokenheartornoheart.Andnooneeversays,“Iloveyouwithallmybrain!”
Somethingelse:whenwepointtoourselves,weneverpointourfingeratourhead.Wepointtoourheart.
Iffeelingscreateourlifeexperience,somelogicalquestionsarise.
Doestheheartemitastrongenergy?Dotraditionalculturesrecogniseheartorfeelingenergy?Istheheartmorethanjustapump?
Canwemeasureenergyfromtheheart?
ThisisaquestionposedbyagroupofscientistsattheInstituteofHeartMath:www.heartmath.com.
HeartMath31foundthat“theheartproducesbyfarthebody’smostpowerfulrhythmicelectromagneticfield”.Thisenergyfieldisaboutthreemetresacrossandencirclesyourchestlikeahugedoughnut.
Thiselectromagneticheartfieldis5,000TIMESSTRONGERthanthefieldsurroundingyourbrain.Thisissignificant!Suddenly,theideathathowyoufeelshapesyourdestinysoundsalotmorereasonable.Yourheartnotonlyknowsthings;itremembersthem.
AMystery
Yourheartnotonlyknowsthings;itremembersthem.
Inthelast50yearswehavelearntmuchaboutthebrainbutlessabouttheheart.Wedon’tknowwhatstartstheheartbeatinginthewombandwedon’tknowwhyaheartcankeepbeatingafteritisdisconnectedfromthebrain.32
Ifyouplaceagroupofheartcellsinadishinalaboratory–witheachofthemseparated–theywillbeattoasinglerhythm.Howdotheydoit?Howdotheyknow?
MoreMysteries
Psychoneuroimmunologist,PaulPearsallPhD,spentthirtyyearsstudyingpeoplewhohavehadhearttransplants.Heamassed140reportsandaudio-tapesfrompatientswhoreceivedotherpeople’shearts.
Inhisbest-seller,TheHeart’sCode,33hetellsstoriesofpatientswhodevelopedthebehavioursandpassionsoftheirhearts’donorsBEFORETHEYKNEWanythingaboutthedonors.Forexample:
Athirty-five-year-oldfemalerecipientreceivedtheheartofatoplessdancer.Shereportedthatbeforethetransplant,sexwasnotabigpartofherlife.Aftertheoperationsheexplained,“Iwantsexeverynight…NowItiremyhusbandout…IusedtohateX-ratedvideos,nowIlovethem…IthinkIgothersexualdrive.”Afifty-two-year-oldmalewhoreceivedtheheartofaseventeen-year-oldboysaid,“Ilovedquietclassicalmusicbeforemynewheart.NowIputonearphones,crankupthestereoandplayloudrock-and-rollmusic.”
Inherautobiography,AChangeofHeart,ClaireSylvia34tellsofherowntransformation.Beforereceivingaheartandlungtransplant,shewasconservativeandhealth-conscious.Afterhertransplantshedevelopedapassionforbeer,chickennuggetsandmotorbikes.Whenshespokewiththedonor’sfamilyshediscoveredthatshehadbeengiventheheartofabeer-drinking,chickennugget-lovingmotorcyclist.
DrPearsallrecountsthestoryofaneight-year-oldgirlwhoreceivedtheheartofamurderedten-year-oldgirl.Theeight-year-oldbegantohavenightmares–andreportedthatsheknewtheidentityofthekillerofherheart’sdonor.
Policeuseddescriptionsandevidenceprovidedbytheeight-year-oldtoarrestthemurderer,whowasultimatelyconvicted.ReportsPearsall,“thetime,theweapon,theplace,theclotheshewore,whatthelittlegirlhekilledhadsaidtohim…
everythingthehearttransplantrecipientreportedwascompletelyaccurate.”35
Howcanthisbe?
AnemergingviewisthatALLcells–notjustbraincells–havememory.DNAcodeiscontainedineverycellofyourbody.So,too,itseems,ismemory.
TheWesternconceptisthatthebrainiskingandtheheartisapump.Butthehearthasanervoussystemofitsown.Theheartisaconsciousorgan.Yourheartnotonlyknowsthings;itremembersthem.
WhatTraditionalCulturesKnow
Traditionalculturesknowaboutlifeforceorheartenergy.Thereareover100wordsforit.ThePolynesianscallitmana,theIndiansandTibetanscallitprana,theIroquoiscallitorendam,theIturipygmiescallitmegbe,ChineseandJapanesemedicinecallsitchi.
Westernmedicinecallsitbaloney.
IntheWestwetendtoworshipthebrainandignoretheheart.Westernmedicinehasnowords–andnoplace–for“lifeforce”,“prana”or“chi”.AnditisintheWestthatheartdiseaseisoutofcontrol.Isnaturetryingtotellussomething?
InaNutshell
Yourfeelingsarenotjustincidentalby-productsofyourthoughts.Yourfeelingsareyourlifeforce.TheyareyourlifelinetotheUniverse.
Shouldthissurpriseus?Thefirstorgantoforminyourmother’s
wombwasyourheart.“Iknowmyhusbandcanbelovingandkind.Heisthatwaywiththedog.”
“Iknowmyhusbandcanbelovingandkind.Heisthatwaywiththedog.”
19.WeAreAllConnected
Isitselfishtoseekhappiness?
Psychologicaltestsprovethatwhenyouarehappy,youaremorelikelytolendpeoplemoneyorcarrytheirgroceries.Similartestsprovethatwhenyouaremiserableyouaremorelikelytostealtheirwalletorkickadog.
Soyourhappinessbenefitseveryonearoundyouandallthedogsintheneighbourhood.
Itdoesn’tstopthere…
HelpingPeopleataDistance
DuringtheIsraeli-LebaneseWarin1983,DrCharlesNAlexanderandDrDavidOrme-Johnson36conductedastunningstudyinJerusalem.
Theywantedtofindout,“Whathappenswhenagroupofpeoplefeelpeaceful?Andwhathappensifagroupofpeoplefeelhappyandpeacefulinthemiddleofawarzone?”
FortwomonthsbetweenAugust1andSeptember30,agroupofmeditators,ranginginnumberbetween65and241,meditatedtwicedailyinahotelinEastJerusalem.Theirmissionwassimplytocometogetherandfeelpeace.Andwhathappened?
Duringthesetwomonths,wardeaths,terroristattacks,fires,hospitalemergenciesandautomobileaccidentsdecreasedmarkedly–inLebanon,JerusalemandIsraelasawhole.Therewasapreciserelationship.
DrAlexanderandDrOrme-Johnsonmadeasophisticatedanalysis,accountingforvariablessuchasweather,daysoftheweekandholidays.Thedatashowedthatwhentheexperimentbegan,violencedecreasedimmediately.Whenmoremediatorsparticipated,violencedecreasedfurther.Whentheexperimentstopped,theviolencereturnedtoformerlevels.
Theirresearchpaper,TheInternationalPeaceProjectintheMiddleEast,isonline.37
SimilarstudiestothishavebeenconductedinPuertoRico,inthePhilippines,inDelhi,Indiaandintwenty-fourcitiesacrosstheUnitedStates.Itonlytakesasmallgrouptomakeadifference–asfewasahundredpeopleinacityofamillion.
WhatElse?
Youmayask,“Ifweareinvisiblyconnected,shouldn’ttherebescientificevidence?”Thereis.Herearesomeexamples.
In1988DrRandolphByrd38
conductedastudyattheSanFranciscoGeneralHospitalcoronarycareunit,demonstratingthatheartpatientswhowereprayedforbyrandomgroupsscatteredaroundtheworldrecoveredsignificantlybetterthanpatientswhowerenotprayedfor.Biofeedbackexpert,DrElmerGreen,39hascomparedtheelectrostaticenergyreleasedfromthebodiesofordinarypeople(10-15millivolts)withtheelectrostaticenergyreleasedbymeditatorswhentheyare
meditatingandhealerswhentheyarehealing.Hefoundhealersproducedvoltagesofupto190volts–or100,000timesthenormalamount.In1966,CleveBackster40connectedapolygraph(liedetector)toapotplant.Hewascurioustoseewhetherhisdracaenaplantwouldreacttobeingwatered.Whenthepolygraphrecordedasmallresponse,hewondered,“WhatwouldhappenifIburnedaleaf?”Thatiswhentherecordingpenswungwildlyandnearlyjumpedoffthepage.Backsterhadn’tevenburnedtheplantyet!Hehadsimplythoughtaboutit.Backsterhadstumbledontosomething.Hespentthenextthirtyyearsinresearchdemonstratingthatplants,mouldcultures,eggsandevenyoghurthaveanawarenessoftheirsurroundingsthathecalled“primaryperception”.NobelPrizewinner,NielsBohr,discoveredthat,oncesub-atomicparticleshavebeenincontactwitheachother,theyremainforeverinfluencedbyeachother.Toexplain,let’simaginetwoparticles;we’llcallthemBobandAlice.TheyspendonecrazynighttogetherinRio,andthenBobmovestoMiami.Here’swhat’samazing:wheneverBobchangesthespeedatwhichheisspinning,Alicewillchange,too.EvenifBobmovestotheothersideoftheUniverse,whenBobchangeshisspeedofrotation,Alicewillchange,too,ATTHEEXACTSAMEINSTANT.
Thisphenomenon,whereparticlesremainlinkedforever,isknowninquantumphysicsas“entanglement”.Myquantumphysicistfriend,Phil,explains,“Itdoesn’ttakeageniustofigurethat,aseverythingwascreatedatthesametime,theneverythingisentangled.Andthatincludesyouandme.”
ThephenomenonwhereparticleslikeBobandAlice,millionsof
lightyearsapart,danceinperfectstep,regardlessoftimeordistance,isknownas“nonlocality”.
Whatmoreproofdoweneedthateverythingisconnected?
For2600yearstheBuddhistshavebeensayingthatalllifeisconnected,andyouarepartofit.
Aboriginalculturesknowit.ToquoteDrBruceLipton,“Aboriginalculturesdonotmaketheusualdistinctionsbetweenrocks,airandhumans;allareimbuedwithspirit,theinvisibleenergy.Doesn’tthissoundfamiliar?Thisistheworldofquantumphysicsinwhichmatterandenergyarecompletelyentangled.”41
ThisistheUniversewelivein.Wetakeradiowavesandultrasoundforgranted.Andmicrowaves–isn’titamazingthatyoucanbestandinginasolidsteelelevatorandtakeaphonecallfromyourmother?HowdoesyourMumgetthroughsolidsteel?
Humansaresimplysophisticatedtransmittersandreceivers.EdisonandEinsteinhadnodoubtsaboutthat.
PartsReflectingtheWhole
Theideaofeverytinypartbeingconnectedtothewholeisnotnew.Herearesomeexamples.
Holograms–those3Dimagesthatweoftenseeoncreditcardsandsoftwarepackages.Youmayhave,forexample,animageofaneagle.Theentireimageisineverypartofthehologram.Ifyousmashthehologramintoathousandpieces,yougetathousandcompletelittleimagesofaneagle.EverycellinyourbodycontainstheDNAblueprintforyour
entirebody.
RememberProfessorWolfgangPauli’sExclusionPrinciple–elementsthroughouttheUniversearecontinuallyadjustingandrespondingtoeachother?Whatdoesthisresemble?
Itresembleshowasinglecellworks.Itresembleshowthe50trillioncellsinyourbodycooperate.ItresemblestheGaiaeffect–howtheEarthcontinuestobringitselfbackintobalance.
AhundredyearsagoNobelPrizewinnerandoriginatorofquantumphysics,MaxPlanck,discoveredthatavacuumisn’tavacuum.Emptyspaceisactuallyahiveofactivity.
IftheUniverseisactuallyahiveofroaringactivityandthereisnosuchthingasemptyspace,theneverythingISconnectedtoeverythingelse.
InaNutshell
ThewholeUniverseisaliving,breathing,consciousthing.Wecouldcallituniversalconsciousness.
20.InspirationHowoftendoesthishappentoyou?Youhavebeentryingtofigureoutwhattosayinaspeechorwonderingwheretofindamissingfile.Youaresittingonthetoilet–youarenoteventryingtosolvetheproblem–whenoutoftheblue,youknowtheanswer.
Ormaybeyou’vespentweekswonderingwhattobuyyourMumforherbirthday.Youaresoapingyourselfintheshower,andbingo!Yougettheperfectsolution!
Suchsolutionspopoutofyoursubconsciousmind.Wetouchedonthisearlier.
Thesubconsciousmindonlyengageswhenwearerelaxed–andformanyofus,oneofthefewtimeswerelaxisonthetoilet.Infact,youhavetorelaxtogetthejobdone!
Itisthejoboftheconsciousmindtoposetheproblem,tosetthegoal.Beyondthat,theconsciousmindisoflimitedvalue.
Allofusareopentoinnerguidanceandinspiration.Wecaneachaccesshelpfromasourcehigherthanourphysicalselves.WhetheryouarecomfortablewithwordslikeGod,Sourceorinfinitewisdomisnotanissue.Butyouneedtobeseriouslyaskingandseriouslylistening.Innercommunicationislikeregularcommunicationbetweenpeople.Togethelp,youneedtobeopentoit.
TheProblemwithEgo
ImaginethatIwantedtogettothetrainstationandIstoppedyouinthestreettosay,“Canyoutellmewhichwaytothetrainstation?Actually,IdoknowthewayandIhavefoundmy
ownwaytherebeforeverysuccessfully,andIhavesomegoodreasonswhyI’mhereandnotthereyet,andIdon’treallyneedanyone’shelp,butI’mcurioustoseeifyouknowasmuchasme.I’mdoingfine,actually,andIcanfinditbymyself.”
Wouldyouhelpmegettothestation?Notlikely.
I’mjustifyingallmyactions.IalreadyhavealltheanswersandI’mnotlistening,anyway.Myegoisintheway.
ButwhatifIhadbeenwanderingthestreetsforthreedaysandIstaggeredtowardyou,thirstyandexhausted,andsaid,“HowdoIgettothestation?”
NowI’mhungryforinformation.I’mmakingnoexcuses.I’mbeyondworryingaboutwhatyouthinkofme.Myegoisoutoftheway.I’minastateofcompletenon-resistance.NowI’mlistening.Nowyoucanhelpme.
Ineverydaylifewecanreceivehelponlywhenweareopentoit.Soitiswithinnerguidance,inspirationandintuition.
Sodoyouhavetobeonyourkneesbeforeyougetinspiration?Notatall.Theeasiestwaytogetinspirationisbybeinghappyandgrateful.That’swhenlifeflows,that’swhenyougetideaswhenyouneedthem,andthat’swhenyoukeepfindingyourselfintherightplaceattherighttime.
Thewaytochokeeverythingoffistobeupset,angryanddepressed.Whilewearearguingwitheverythingandinsistingthattheworldiswrong,whilewearefullofexcuses,ourmindistoodistractedtoevennoticeanyhelp.
Theeasiestwaytogetinspirationisbybeinghappyandgrateful.
InaNutshell
ItmakesnodifferencewhetheryouareaChristian,aMuslim,aBuddhist,aScientologist,anatheistoracommunist;whoeveryouare,youcanaskforhelpandgetit.
WillIHearaVoicefromtheSky?
Whenyouareoverwhelmedanddistressed,yourbeststrategyistosay,“Pleaseshowmethenextstep.”Ifyouarehumbleenoughandopenenoughtosay,“JustshowmewhatIneedtodotoday,”andaskforthesamehelptomorrow,youcanfindyourwayoutofthehole.
Let’ssaythatyouareflat-broke.You’velostyourjob,you’rehungry,yourcarhasbeenrepossessedandyouarefacingeviction.Youseenowayoutandsoyoudecidetoaskfordivineguidance.
Now,toyou,theidealsolutionmaybefirstprizeina$50millionlottery–butsolutionsmaycomeinotherways.Verylikely,helpwillbemoreofanunfoldingprocess.Helpdoesn’tmeanthateverythingisfixedforus.Helpmeansassistanceanddirection.
Askandyouwillbeshown,butusually,itwon’tbeavoicefromthesky.Itcouldbethatafriendcallswithahelpfulsuggestion.Itcouldbethatyouareledtoabookoramagazinearticle.Itcouldbethatfornoknownreason,youturntoaTVchannelyouneverwatchandseeanadvertisementyouneversawbefore.
Oftenwereceivehelpandneverrecogniseit.Sowesay,“Itwasn’tdivineinspiration.ItwasactuallymyoldfriendTedwhoshowedupunexpectedly.”Infact,Tedwasapartofamiraculousprocess.
InaNutshell
Ifweonlyask,wefindhelpandguidance.Aswemakeitahabittosilentlygivethanks,helpandguidancecomemoreandmoreoften.
FindingYourWallet,FindingAnswers
Howoftendoyoulosesomething–yourkeys,yourwallet,yourphone–andsearchdesperately,withoutluck.Eventuallyyougiveup.Yousaytoyourself,“IfIquitlooking,Iwillfindit.”
Youabandonyourdesperatesearchandgetonwithyourday.Andthen,withinminutes,andforabsolutelynoreason,youdecidetoshiftacushiononthesofaandthere,wedgedintothearmrest,isyourwallet.
Thesecrettofindingsolutionsinyourlifeisalotlikefindingyourwallet.Yousaytoyourself,“Iwanttofindit.Iwillfindit,”andthenyouquitbangingyourheadagainstawall.Youletgo.
NeedingDoesn’tHelp
Wantingisanimportantpartoftheprocess.Butitisarelaxedkindofwanting–notadesperate“thisisruiningmylife”kindofneeding.
Hereisanimportantdistinction:thefeelingofneedingistotally
differentfromthefeelingofwanting.Needingismorelikeahopelessdesperation.Whenyouneedsomething,yourattentionisonwhatyoudon’thave.Andwhenyoufocusonwhatyoudon’thave,youwillcontinuenottohaveit.
Wantingismoreoftenahappyanticipation.Whenyouwantsomething,youarefocusedonwhatyouwillhave.Thatiswhyyougetit.
Songwritersandinventorswilloftensay,“Theideajustcametome.”Perhapsyouhavethought,“Howcomebrilliantideasdon’tcometome?Iwouldliketoinventsomething!Iwouldliketowriteahitsong.”Whenyoureally,reallywantideasandinspiration,theydocome.
Singerandsongwriter,CaroleKing,haswrittenover100hitsongs.SaysCarole,“WhenI’mtrulypresent,Igetoutofthewayandallthisstuffcomesthrough.”SirPaulMcCartney,ex-Beatleandwriterofthemostrecordedpoptuneever,saidthatthemelodyfor“Yesterday”cametohiminadream.Yousay,“Whataluckyguy!Hetakesanapandwakesuphavingwrittenthemostpopulartuneinhistory.I’dliketodothat!”
Butthereismoretoit.Hereisamanwhoseeverywakingmomentwasdedicatedtowritingbeautifulmusic.Hespenthislifeputtingphrasesandmelodiestogetherandpullingthemapart.Whenyouloveyourworkthatmuch–andwhenyouaskyoursubconsciousforhelp–yougetanswers.
TheotherhalfofthestoryisthatPaulspentmonthswritingthelyrics.Sosometimesyougetflashesofinspirationandsometimesyouneedtorollupyoursleeves.
InaNutshell
Thesecrettofindingsolutions–creativesolutions,financialsolutions,relationshipsolutions–istwofold.Youhavetowantit,andyourmindneedstobeinarelaxedstateofanticipation.
SoHowDoesAllThis“Feelings”InformationFitwithSpirituality?
Itfitsperfectly.Itexplainsspiritualityperfectly.
Itexplainswhyallthegreatspiritualteachingshavelove(feeling)astheirfoundation.WhetheryouareHindu,Sikh,Taoist,Christian,MuslimorJewish,yousimplyEMBRACEYOURSPIRITUALBELIEFSSOTHATYOUFEELASGOODASYOUPOSSIBLYCAN,ALWAYS.
Youmightsay,“ButI’mnotspiritual.”
Ifyoucandelightinwatchingababysleep,ifyoucanbetransfixedbyamountainview,ifyouhaveeverbeenentrancedbyanelephantorahummingbird,ifyoufindjoyinpaddlingacanoeorwonderintheeyesofaGermanShepherdorawhale,youarespiritual.
Thelifeforcethatholdstogetheradiamond,thelifeforcethatrunsthroughanoaktreeorakitten,isthesamelifeforcethatrunsthroughyouandme.
Youcan’thelpbeingspiritual.TheUniverseiscoursingthroughyou;spiritisinyou.
Thefirstpeace,whichisthemostimportant,isthatwhichcomeswithinthesoulsofpeoplewhentheyrealisetheirrelationship,theironenesswiththeuniverseandallitspowers,andwhentheyrealiseatthecentreoftheuniversedwellstheGreatSpirit,andthatthiscentreisreally
everywhere,itiswithineachofus.
BlackElk,SiouxMedicineMan
Inhisclassicbook,TheAutobiographyofaYogi,ParamahansaYogananda42tellsthestoryofhissearchforaguru.Hisquestbeginsattheageoftwelve.HetravelsthousandsofmilesaroundIndiaandeventuallyfindshismasterlivingalmostnextdoor.
Yogananda’sstoryiseveryman’sstory.
WelongtoconnectwiththepoweroftheUniverse.Wejoingroups,doseminarsandscalemountainsinTibet.Wevisitcathedralsandmakepilgrimages.Butwedon’treallyneedtogoanywhere:
Youdonotneedtoleaveyourroom.Remainsittingatyourtableandlisten.Donotevenlisten,simplywait,bequiet,stillandsolitary.Theworldwillfreelyofferitselftoyoutobeunmasked,ithasnochoice,itwillrollinecstasyatyourfeet
FranzKafka
InaNutshell
Youarenotseparatefromanything.Youdon’thavetogoanywheretofindthepoweroftheUniverse.Youfinditbyfeelingdifferent.
21.ABetterWaytoAchieveGoalsDoesachievinggoalsmakeushappy?AccordingtoMotherTeresa,notnecessarily.Shesaid,“Moretearsareshedoveransweredprayersthanunansweredones.”
DidyoueverchasesomethingandGETit–apayrise,adegree,atrophy–anditdidn’tmakeyouashappyasyouhadhoped?
Soisthereaproblemwithsettinggoals?No,thereissometimesaproblemwithHOWwesetgoals.
ChoosingSpecificGoals
Therearetwoproblemswithchoosingspecificgoals…
TheFIRSTPROBLEM:Whenyoufixyourmindonaspecificwife,carorjob,youarechoosingbasedonlyonwhatyoucansee.Soyoulimityourself.Youcan’tpossiblyknowwhetheritisthebestoptionforyou.
AndtheSECONDPROBLEM?Whenyoufixyourmindonsomething,itisveryhardtoremainunattachedandhappy.Youkeepthinking,“Issomebodyelsegoingtograbmycar,job,apartmentorfuturehusbandbeforeIdo?”
Soifwewanttobehappy,doesgoal-settingneedtobemorecomplicated?”
Actually,itneedstobesimpler.
TheSolution
Therearebasicallytwowaystopursueourdreams.TheHARDWAY…
Thisiswhenwesay,“Iknowbest!”Wechooseveryspecificgoals:ImusthaveTHATgirl,THATjob,THATcar.ImustgetonTHATflight.Wesometimesachieveourgoal,butweareregularlydisappointed.
TheEASYwayistobelessspecific…
Let’ssayyouthinkyouhavefoundtheperfectcar,job,apartment,vacationpackage.ItSEEMStobetheanswertoyourprayers.Whatdoyoudo?Youbegintofeelyourgoalhappilyachieved,andhereiswhatyoutellyourself:
“thatcarORSOMETHINGBETTER”.“thatapartmentORSOMETHINGBETTER.”“theperfectmanforme–WHOEVERHEIS.”
“They’renothappy.Theyjustthinkthey’rehappy.”
Thiswayofthinkingbecomesyourwayoflife.
Themagicisthatyouareunattached.Youacceptthatyourconsciousmindcanonlyseeafractionofthepicture.
Beforeyoubookaflight,youseeandfeelyourself
travellingontheperfectflight–andyouletthingsunfoldBeforemakinganappointmentwithadoctor,dentist,accountant,youseeandfeelyourselffindingtheperfectprofessional–andyouletthingsunfoldBeforeyouhireasecretary,bookavacation,attendaninterview,goonadate,youfeelitasunfoldingperfectly.
Youdon’ttrytofigureitallout.Youjustknowthatyouareconnectedtoeverythingandthatwhenyouarecalmandwhenyoubelieveintheprocess,itworks.
TheSecret
TheIndianguru,JKrishnamurti,oncegavealecture.Midwaythroughhistalkhestopped.Heaskedhisaudience,“Doyouwanttoknowwhatmysecretis?”
Thehallwentsilent.Everyoneleanedforward.Everyonewantedtoknow.Krishnamurticontinued,“Thisismysecret:Idon’tmindwhathappens.”
Thisisthesecrettogoal-setting.
YoufeelgoodYoupicturetheperfectresultforyouYoutakewhateveractionseemsnecessary,momentbymomentYoudon’tmindwhathappens.
Yousay,“Andrew,ittookusahundredpagestogettothispoint!Nowyousay,‘Feelgoodanddon’tcarewhathappens!’.”That’sright.ThebestanswersareSIMPLE.
Spiritualteachersoftenusetheexampleoftheacorn.Theacornhastheideaofthebeautifuloakinsideit.Itdoesn’tstruggleto
beatree.
Itisthesamewithus.Wearebornwiththeideaofabeautifullifeinsideus.Strugglingdoesn’thelp.
InaNutshell
Thehardwayisforcingthingstohappen.Theeasywayisallowingthingstohappen.
22.ASketchofHowLifeWorksThisiswherewehavecomesofar.Hereisasketchofhowlifeworks:
NOTHINGINTHISUNIVERSEISREALLYSOLID(provenby100yearsofquantumphysicsexperiments)whichmeans:EVERYTHINGISENERGY(demonstratedbyAlbertEinstein’sfamouse=mc2)andMATTERISREALLYCRYSTALLISEDTHOUGHTTHOUGHTSAFFECTMATTER(beautifullyillustratedbyDrMasaruEmotoandhiscrystals)WHENONETINYELECTRONCHANGESITSSPIN,CHANGESREVERBERATEACROSSTHEUNIVERSE(asprovenbyProfessorWolfgangPauli),whichprovesEVERYTHINGISCONNECTED.
Thisallsoundsbeyondbelief–butthen,soistheconceptofcreationoraBigBang.
AUniversethatisexpandingatthespeedoflightisalsobeyondbelief–andsoisthefactthatthereare300,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000thingshappeninginyourbodyeverysecond.
Itisallmiraculous,includingthefactthat:
YOURSUBCONSCIOUSSTORESALLTHETHOUGHTSANDFEELINGSTHATYOUHAVEEVERHAD(whichiswhyhypnosisdigsupoldmemories)Becauseeverythingisconnected,YOURSUBCONSCIOUSISCONNECTEDTOEVERYTHING.Thisexplainswhy:YOURSUBCONSCIOUSMINDCREATESYOURLIFEEXPERIENCE.
Thegoodnewsis:
FEELINGSREPROGRAMYOURSUBCONSCIOUSWHENYOUFEELDIFFERENT,YOUCHANGEYOURDESTINY.
Youareresponsibleforyourlifeexperience.Youarecreatingyourlife,momentbymoment.
YouAlwaysKnewIt
Sowhatistheformulaforsuccessandhappiness?
LivewithjoyandenthusiasmUseyourimaginationtocreatevividpicturesofwhatyouwantPersisttowardyourgoalsinalight-heartedhappywayLivewithoutfearandprejudiceLetgoofdisappointmentsForgiveinaheartbeatLovefornoreason.
Yousay,“Bereal!Wholiveslikethat?”Andtheansweris:“Three-year-oldchildren.”
Youarrivedhereprogrammedforsuccess.Atthree,youknewhowlifeworks.
Jesussaid,“Exceptyebeconvertedandbecomeaslittlechildren,yeshallnotenterintothekingdomofheaven.”43
Whatdoyouthinkheistalkingabout?
“NowthatIfeel
HeavenisnotachunkofrealestatefordeadpeoplesomewherebetweenVenusandUranus.Heavenisastateofmind.Heavenisastateofbeingwherelifeunfoldsmiraculously.
InaNutshell
Fortunately,youdon’thavetorememberanyquantumphysics.Juststudythethree-year-oldmasters.
WillSuccessMakeMeHappy?
No.Youhavetobehappyfirst.Youhavetolikeyourselffirst.
Ifyouaremiserablebeforeapromotion,youwillbemiserableafterapromotion.Ifyoufeelworthlesswithoutamilliondollars,youwillfeelworthlesswithamilliondollars.Iflifeisemptywithoutaboyfriend,lifewillbeemptywithaboyfriend.
Achievinggoalswon’tmakeyouhappy.Youneedtolikeyourselfwhenyouarenotachieving!
InaNutshell
Theworldbelieves,“Successmakesyouhappy.”Thetruthis;happinessmakesyousuccessful.
TheHappierYouGet…
ThismorningIwasinterviewedonradio.Thehost,Sara,sharedherownstorywiththelisteners.Sheexplained:
“Fiveyearsago,Iwasunhappy.My
somuchhappier,Ican’tbelievehowluckyIget!”
boyfriendisalwayshappy.
“MyboyfriendworkswithrefugeesattheYMCA.Hehelpstobuildtheirconfidenceandhelpsthemtostartnewlives.Soheisapositiveguywholooksonthebrightside.
“WheneverIusedtocomplainaboutsomething,hewouldsay,‘Whatisonegoodthingaboutit?’IfIwasunhappyabouthavingtoworkonaweekend,hewouldaskme,‘Whatisgoodaboutworkingonaweekend?Thereislesstraffic.Itmeansyouhaveajob.’
“Heconstantlyencouragedmetolookforgoodthings.Atfirst,itwasirritating.Ifoundithardtochangemythinking.Butitgoteasiertoseethepositiveside.Iwashappier.Eventually,lookingforgoodthingsbecameahabit.
“NowthatIfeelsomuchhappier,Ican’tbelievehowluckyIget!”Sara’sexperienceisthisbookinanutshell.Atfirst,itcanbehardtofindreasonstobehappy.Butitgetseasier.Yougathermomentumandthebetteryoufeel,the“luckier”youget.
Forthoseofuswhodon’thaveSara’sboyfriendtocoachus,thenextthreechapterssharethreesimpleprinciplesthatchangeeverything.SometimesIaskmyself,“WhyamItheluckyone?”
SometimesIaskmyself,“WhyamItheluckyone?”
“WhenI’mhappy,thenI’llbegrateful!”
23.BeGratefulIftheonlyprayeryoueversayinyourentirelifeis“Thankyou”,itwillbeenough.
MeisterEckhart
AsakidIoftenaskedthequestion,“IfGodissowonderful,whywouldHecareifwesaythankyou?Whygivethanksatmealtimes?Whatisthepointofthosebedtimeprayers:‘ThankyouforMummyandDaddyandawarmbed.’?Whyisgratitudeimportant?”
WhydidAbraham,Zoroaster,LaoTzu,Buddha,JesusChrist,Mohammed,YoganandaandmyMumallrecommendbeingthankful?Andwhyisitthatsomanypeoplemaketimeforgratitudejournals?
It’sbecausegratitudechangesyou.Thereisnofasterwaytoelevateyourvibration.Gratitudeisthefasttracktothelifeyouwant.
Themoreoftenthatyouhavethefeeling,“IhavewhatIwant”,themoreoftenyougetwhatyouwant.Appreciationisasgoodasmeditation.
Howdoyoupractisegratitude?Herearesimplethingsanysix-year-oldcando.
EACHNIGHT:Asyougotosleep,reviewyourdayandmakealistofeverythingyouarethankfulfor:family,friends,sunshine,medication,deodorant,yourlaptop,asafeflight,agreatlunch,alaughwithaneighbour,awalkwithyourdog,stars…
EACHMORNING:Givethanksforonemoreday.
KEEPAGRATITUDEJOURNAL:Makelistsofeverythingthatyouarethankfulforandkeepaddingtoit.
MAKEAGRATITUDEBOARD:Ihaveapinboardbymydesk.Itiscoveredwithabout50photographsoffamilyandfriendsIlovethemost,photographsofplacesJulieandIhaveenjoyedthemost,highlightsofvacationsandeventsforwhichIfeelblessed.Ilookatiteverydayandtellmyself,“IAMsolucky!”IputittogetherwhenIwasfeelingstuckandnotverygrateful.
Agratitudeboardisajoytomake.Andhere’sthekey–eachtimeyoulookatit,besuretosay“IAMsofortunate,”andnot“HowhappyIWAS.”
“WhenIwasyourageIwasproudtobeseenwithmyparents!”
GIVETHANKSFOREVERYSMALLTHING:Whatevergivesyoujoy–dogsatplay,aglassofcleanwater,ahugfromyourwife–makeitahabittosayasilent“thankyou”.Ifastrangergivesyouasmile,sayasilent,“thankyou”.Ifyouarebrokeandyoufindadollar,say“thankyou”.Gratitudeforeventinythingsmakesyouamagnetformoregoodthings.
WHENTHINGSSEEMTOBEGOINGWRONG:Askyourself,
“Whatisonegoodthingaboutthisdisaster?”Andifyoucanfindnothinggood,say“thankyou”,anyway:“Ihavenoideahowthiscouldpossiblybegood,but‘thankyou’inadvance.”
Onceyouunderstandthatgratitudetransformslives,youbecomeagratitudewarrior.
Onceyoubelievethatnothingisanaccidentandeveryeventishelpingyouonyourjourney,yougivethanksforeverything.That’swhentheUniversereallystartsplottingtomakeyouhappy.
InaNutshell
Averagepeoplesay:“WhenI’mhappy,thenI’llbegrateful.”
Joyfulpeoplesay:“WhenI’mgrateful,thenI’llbehappy.”
24.LivingintheNowWhyisitthatwearesoobsessedwithfindinglove,keepingloveorgettingitback?
Ofcourse,lovefeelswonderful.Forexample,TedmeetsPoppy.Forthefirsttimehehasfoundsomeonewhodoesn’twanttochangehim(yet).Andhedoesn’twanttochangeher.“Poppy,youaremyprincess!Youareperfectjustasyouare!”WhenTedisinPrincessPoppy’sarms,hewantsnothingelse;hewantstobenowhereelse.
IsitthatPoppyissowonderful?Obviously!Anditisalsothis:forthefirsttimeinhislifeTedistotallyhappywiththepresentmoment.Forthirtyyearshehasbeenconsumedbythebeliefthat“Ishouldbebetter.Ishouldbericher,smarter,taller.OnceIgetthis,onceIbecomethat,I’llbeokay.”ButwhenheiswithPoppy,everythingisperfect.
Loveisseeingthebestinourselvesreflected.Loveisawindowontothebeautyofhumanity.Andloveisawindowintothepresentmoment.
WhenTedhasthatrushofjoy,thatboundless,breathlessenergythatfillshisbeing,hethinksit’sPOPPY.HisfriendsthinkheisonDRUGS.ItisactuallyTedembracingthePRESENTMOMENT.
Whenyoufallinlove,youhavenoresistance.Youarenolongertryingtofixanythingorchangeanyone.Youarenotjudging,hidingorwishingyouwereanyplaceelse.Youbecomeapurechannelforuniversalenergy.
InaNutshell
Whenyoufindlove,youareinthepresent.Andifyoucanfindthepresent,youfindlove.
YouHaveNoFuture!
Self-helpgurusandZenBuddhiststellustoliveinthepresent,butdoesitmatter?Itmatters.Becausewhenyouarehappy,enthusiastic,absorbed,inlove,youplugintothepoweroftheUniverse.Whenyouaredissatisfied,distractedanddepressed,youareunplugged–andwhenyouareunplugged,youarepowerlesstocreateanythingbetter.
Yourkeytoabetterlifeistofeelgoodnow.Notnextweek,notwhenyoupayofftheapartment,notwhenpeaceisdeclaredintheMiddleEast.Everymomentthatyouspendregrettingthepastorfearingthefutureisanaffirmationthatlifeislousy–
Thetwomostpowerfulwordsintheuniverseare,“IAM”.
andsoyougetmoreof“lousy”.
Here’sanotherreasontoliveinthepresent:thefuturedoesn’texist.Youhavenofuture!Ofcourse,wepretenditdoes.Wepretendthattimeislikeapieceofstringwherethepastisononeend,thefutureisontheotherend,andthepresentisinthemiddle.Notso.
Allwehaveisaneternallyunfoldingpresentmoment.TheonlytimeyouwillevermeetthefutureiswhenitbecomesNOW.Andwhenthefutureisnow,itisnotthefuture.
Whyeventalkaboutthis?Becauseitexplainswhysomepeoplewhoimagineawonderfulfuturestaystuckinacrappypresent.Thereisnovalueinwaitingforsomethingthatdoesn’texist.Itisuselesstellingyourself“IWILLBErich,IWILLBEhappy,IWILLBEsuccessful.”Whenyourmindisinthefutureyouarespinningyourwheels.
Yourpowerisinthepresent:“IAMrich.IAMhappy.IAMsuccessful.”WhatdidGodsaytoMoses?“IAMthatIAM.”It’snocoincidence.Godgetsit.ThetwomostpowerfulwordsintheUniverseare,“IAM”.
Somepeoplelivetheirlifeliketheyarestrandedinawasteland:“OnedayI’llfindmywayoutofthishellandmylifewillstart.”No!YouescapebygatheringhappythoughtsNOW.Howso?Becauseproblemsexistinthefuture.Unlessyouarehavingaheartattackorbeingeatenbyabear,yourpresentmomentisusuallyfine.Itistheimaginaryfuturethatdrivesyounuts:“Whatwillhappenif?HowwillIsurviveif?Whatwillotherpeoplesay?”
Youareperfectlydesignedtohandlepresentmoments.You
conquerworrybydraggingyourmindbacktothepresent.Youremindyourself,“RightthissecondIhaveeverythingIneed.IchoosetoenjoyTHISmoment.”Everysecondthatyouliveinthepresentmomentisanaffirmationthatlifeisgood–andthat“feelinggoodness”showersmoregoodnessonyou.
Yourlifewillworktotheextentthatyoucansay:
thereisnothingIneedotherthanthismomentthereisnooneIneedtoimpressandnooneIneedtobecomeIamwhatIamIhaveeverythingIneedtobehappy.
InaNutshell
Theanswertothebigquestion,“WhatshouldIdowithmyfuture?”is“Liveinthepresent”.
25.LoveYourself
BeGentlewithYourself
Thereisonedangerinacceptingthatyoucreateyourlifeexperience:onceyouacknowledgethatyouareresponsibleforhowyourlifehasunfolded,youmaywanttobeatyourselfup!Youmayaskyourself,“HowcouldIhavebeensostupid?”Youmayblameyourselforevenhateyourself.Thisisareallybadidea!
Here’sabetterwaytotalktoyourself:
“IhavebeenlivinglifethebestwayIknowhow.”“NowthatIknowbetter,Iwillthinkandfeeldifferently.”“NowthatIknowbetter,Iwilldobetter.”
Congratulateyourselfonsurvivingtothispoint.NOSHAME.NOBLAME.
WhyLovingYourselfMatters
EveryexperienceyouwilleverhaveiscolouredbyHOWYOUFEELABOUTYOU.
Everythought,everyconversation,everywakingmoment,everydreamingmomentisshapedbywhetheryoulove,hate,blameorforgiveyourself.
Sonowwegettotheheartofthematter.Because:
thelifeyoucreatedependsonhowyoufeeltherewillneverbeatimeinyourlifewhenyouarenotpresent(becausewhereveryougo,youarealwaysthere!)
EVERYTHINGTHATHAPPENSINYOURLIFEDEPENDSONHOWYOUFEELABOUTYOU.
TOCONTINUOUSLYHAVEGOODTHINGSHAPPENINGINYOURLIFE,YOUHAVETOLOVEYOURSELF–notinsomearrogant,conceitedorboastfulway,butinanaccepting,compassionate,good-humouredway.
Peoplewholoveandacceptthemselvesareenergeticandoptimistic.Theyarehealthier.Theyhavetheirchallenges,buttheydon’ttakeproblemspersonally.Thingsalwaysseemtoworkout.Peoplewhoblameandberatethemselveslivelivesofstruggleanddesperation.
Theevidenceiseverywhere.Itdoesn’tmatterhowmuchyouknow.FORYOURLIFETOWORK,YOUHAVETOLOVEYOU.
“ButhowcanIlovemyself?”
Buddhagivesussomeencouragement:
Youcansearchthroughouttheentireuniverseforsomeonewhoismoredeservingofyourloveandaffectionthanyouareyourself,andthatpersonisnottobefoundanywhere.Youyourself,asmuchasanybodyintheentireuniversedeserveyourloveandaffection.
Buddha
WhatCanYouDo?
FOCUSONYOURGOODPOINTS:Quitlookingatwhatyoudon’tlikeaboutyourself.Concentrateonwhatyoulikeaboutyou,andthebadstuffwilldropaway.Whatyoufocusonexpands.
ALWAYSSPEAKWELLOFYOURSELF:Nevercriticiseyourself.Itisself-sabotageanditirritatespeople.Ifyouhavenothinggoodtosayaboutyourself,saynothing.
LOOKFORGOODTHINGSINOTHERPEOPLE:Peoplewhofeelbadaboutthemselvessearchforfaultsinothers.Theflipsideis:lookforqualitiesinothersandyouwillfeelbetteraboutyourself.
LOOKFORBEAUTYEVERYWHERE:Torecognisebeautywithinaflower,acathedral,arock,asunset,apuppy,youhavetohaveitwithinyou.Otherwise,youwouldn’tknowitwhenyousawit.
Appreciationofeverythingaroundusleadsustoself-love.
TAKECAREOFYOURHOME:Whereyouliveaffectshowyoufeel.Createaspacethatwillupliftyouwhenyouwalkinthefrontdoor.Neatnesscostsnothing.Bettertoliveinaone-roomapartmentthatiscleanthaninamansionthat’samess.Yourhomemaynotbegrandbutitcanbetidy!Hangpicturesorphotographsthatinspireyou.
Fredsays,“WhenIgetsuccessful,I’llquitlivinglikearat.”Wrong!Tobeasuccessyouhavetobegintolivewell.Youhavetofeelgoodnow.
NURTUREYOURSELF:Firstly,here’swhatnurturingyourselfisNOT.
Lisa,whoisamonthbehindinherrentandowestengrandonhercreditcards,buysatwo-thousand-dollarhandbagandproclaims,“Ideserveit!”No,Lisa!Blowingbigmoneyyoudon’thaveonstuffyoudon’tneedisnotnurturingyourself;it’spunishingyourself.
Nurturingyourselfisdoingthingsthatmakeyoufeelgoodthat
youcanafford.Here’swhatitmightmean:
Ifyouareflat-broke:walkinginacityparkandenjoyingtheflowers;sittinginthefoyerofabeautifulfive-starhotelandreadingabook(it’sfree);learningmassageonlinewithafriendandspoilingeachotherwitharelaxingtreatmentonceaweek.Ifyouhavesomesparedollars:buyinganeconomyairticketandusingpointstoupgradetobusinessclassforthefirsttimeinyourlife;savingtendollarsaweekuntilyoucanaffordtotakeyourMumtolunchatthebestrestaurantintown.
Makeityourmissiontoenjoyaffordablepleasures.Startnow.Nurturingyourselfmeansspendingtimewithpeoplewhoupliftyou.Itmeansseekingoutsweetexperiences,stretchingyourexpectationsandfeelingbetterandbetter,bitbybit.
MEDITATE:ThepurposeofmeditationisTOBEwithoutpurpose.Wearesobusy“doing”,weoftenforgettobehuman“beings”.Meditationistheultimateexerciseindetachmentandfeelinggood.
LEARNTORECEIVE:MaybeyouhaveafriendlikeMary.
Youinvitehertodinner.Shesays,“Don’tgotoanytrouble.”Youbuyherabirthdaypresent.Shesays,“Youshouldn’thave.”Youoffertocarryhergroceries.Shesays,“Icanmanage.”Youtellhershe’sbeautifulandshesays,“I’vegotafatbutt.”
MaybeyouarelikeMary.Ifyouwantarichlife,learntoaccept
Getcomfortablewithreceiving.
otherpeople’shelp,invitations,giftsandcomplimentshappily.
DOTHINGSYOULOVE:Spendtimedoingthingsyoulove–ifnotinyourworktime,theninyoursparetime.Ifyoulovemusic,orpaintingorswimmingwithsharks,maketimeforit.Whenyoudothingsyoulove,youaffirm,“IamworthitandwhatIcareaboutmatters.”
BEGENTLEWITHYOURSELF:Ifyoufinditdifficulttoloveorforgiveyourself,getaphotographofyourselfagedtwo,orfour,
andputitonyourdesk.Itismucheasiertoforgiveafour-year-old.
Weloveourhusbands,wives,parents,boyfriendsandthey’renotperfect.Sowhyshouldyouhavetobeperfect?Tellyourself,“Idon’thavetobeperfect–andthat’sperfect”.
GIVEYOURSELFCREDIT:Ahappylifeisaboutimprovement,notperfection.Celebratesmallstepsofprogress.
InaNutshell
Loveyourself.Yourlifedependsonit.
26.WhyAmIHere?
“WhyamIhere?”
Happinessisthemeaningandthepurposeoflife,thewholeaimandendofhumanexistence.
Aristotle
ImagineforamomentthatyouwereGodandyoudecidedtomakesomehumans.
Thesehumansarelikeapprenticecreators.Theydon’tbuilduniverses,buttheyarefairlyhandy.Theywritestoriesandmakemusic,inventhelicoptersandiPods,buildcitiesandalsomakebabies.
IfyouwereGod,howwouldyoudesignthings?Wouldyouorganiseitsothatthesehumanswerehelplessvictimsoffate–andwhatwouldbethepoint?Orwouldyoudesignaworldwherehumanscouldgraduallyrealisetheirownpowertocreatetheirownlifeexperiences?Howwouldthisbeforascheme?
ThesehumansinhabitaUniversethatseemssolidenough.Butoninvestigationtheydiscoverthatthebuildingblocksofthe
Universearenotsolidparticlesbutwavesofenergy.Thisenergyturnsouttobethesamestuffashumanthoughts.
InthisUniverse,themissionofeveryhumanistotaketotalresponsibilityforhislifebycontrollinghisthoughtsandfeelings.
Doyoulikethisidea?Ihopeso,becausethisisourUniverse.
EdgarMitchell,theApolloastronaut,putitinanutshell:
Ifwechangeourheadsaboutwhoweare–andcanseeourselvesascreative,eternalbeingscreatingphysicalexperience,joinedatthatlevelofexistencewecallconsciousness–thenwestarttoseeandcreatethisworldthatweliveinquitedifferently.44
ThespiritualMastershavealwaystaughtthis.Somepeoplearebornknowingit.Scienceiscatchingup.
Doesitsoundtoofantastic–thatwithourthoughtsandfeelingswecreateourlifeexperience?Theevidenceisallaroundus.Wecomeheretodiscoverourownpower.Weareneithervictimsnorpawns.Wearecreators.
Youhaveprobablyalwayssensedthis.Youarenotsomeleafinthewind.Youcontrolyourdestiny.
TheBigQuestions
Toooftenwefocusonourdifferences.Whatisthedifferencebetweenmenandwomen?Whatisthedifferencebetweenmy
religionandyourreligion?
Butimagineforamomentthatwegatheredsomespiritualmasters–Jesus,Buddha,Mohammed,LaoTzu–andaskedthemtoanswersomebigquestions.Iamguessingthattheywouldallagreeontheanswers.
WhatamI?
YouareasparkofGod,orSource.Youressenceislove.Therestisillusionorwrongthinking.
WhatisMyGoal?
TothinklikeGodthinks.TolovelikeGodloves.TocreatelikeGodcreates.
InSummary
Youareaspirithavingaphysicalexperience.Whatevershowsupinyourlife–joy,abundance,ulcers,theFBI–isprecisefeedbackonwhatyourthoughtsandfeelingshavecreated.
Atsomestagethepennywilldropthatyouareentirelyresponsibleforyourreality.Untilyougetit,lifecanbehellonEarth.
Afteryougetit,lifebecomesagameinwhich:
yourdreamsmovetowardyouwithincreasingspeedeverythingbecomesmoreandmorefun.
Themajorrulesofthegameare:
ACCEPT–yourself,othersandyourcurrentsituation
FORGIVE–yourselfandothersBEGRATEFULLIVEINTHEMOMENTFEELYOURGOALSALREADYACHIEVEDREPLACEFEARWITHLOVEANDKINDNESSBEHAPPY.
Livingwiththeseguidelines,youraiseyourenergyandsteadilybecomemorepowerful.Youachievemoreandmorewithlesseffort.Youalsorealisethatitisnotactuallyyouthatisdoingit.Thepowercomesthroughyou.
Nooneisholdingyouback.Noonecanholdyouback.
Youdon’tneedmoreinformation.Youdon’tneedmoreseminarsoranyone’spermission.Youjustrefineeachpieceofthepuzzleinyourowntimeandknowthatitisperfect.
InaNutshell
YourmissionistoFEELASGOODASPOSSIBLEEVERYMINUTE,EVERYHOUR,EVERYDAY.Thatishowlifeworks.
ThankyouforreadingHowLifeWorks!Ifyouenjoyedit–orifyouhaveanycommentsatallaboutmybooks-pleaseletmeknow!
Belowarelinksforyoutogetintouchorfeelfreetobrowsesomeofmyothertitles!
FacebookMessagemeandjoinourwonderfulFacebookcommunityhere!
[email protected],wetrytorespondtoallofourreader'smessagesinatimelyfashion!
NewsletterJoinournewsletterhereforexclusivecontentfromAndrewMatthews!
DownloadNow
FollowYourHeart
Twomillioncopiessoldin42languagesin60countries:
“FOLLOWYOURHEARTturnedmylifearound...Iliterallyfeltadifferentperson.Thankyouforsuchawonderfulbook!”DebbiePerske,Proserpine,AUSTRALIA
DownloadNow
HappinessNow
The#1bestseller:
“YourbooksgavemealightwhenIwasintotaldarkness.Theychangedmeandmyviewoflife.Nowyourbookshavebecomeakindofbibleforme…IwanttoexpressmyREALandDEEPappreciationforyourbooksandyourmessage.”MoonsunChoi,KOREA
DownloadNow
HappinessinHardTimes
“ReadingHAPPINESSinHARDTIMESIfeltanewsurgeoffaithwithinme.Isometimesneedsomeonetosay,‘Everythingisokay’,andthatiswhatyourbooksdoforme.”JoanTaylor,AUSTRALIA
DownloadNow
BeingaHappyTeen
Overonemillionreaders!Atlast,abookthatteenagerswanttoread:
“Yourbooksdowonderfulthings.Ialwayshatedmyself...Ifailedatexams.Nowmylifehaschangedandnowordscandescribemyhappiness.Thankyou.”NguyenDucAnKhanh,VIETNAM
DownloadNow
HappinessinaNutshell
“BecauseofyourbooksIammoreselfconfident,moresecure,moremotivatedandthelistgoesonandon.ThankyouAndrewMatthewsmostsincerely.”PredragIvanovic,Serbia
DownloadNow
StoptheBullying!
Whybulliesbullyandhowbulliedkidscanmakeastand...abookforparents,teachers,bulliedkidsandbystanders.
“STOPtheBULLYING!-Ilovedit!Extremelyhelpfulandaneasyread.IonlywishIhadthisbook20+yearsago!Boy,thiscertainlywouldhavechangedhowIhandledmybullies!Absolutelyspot-on.”DrDonnaRobinson,Pennsylvania,USA
AndrewMatthews:SpeakerAndrewMatthewsspeakstoconferencesworldwide.
Andrewhasaddressedoverathousandinternationalcorporationsonfivecontinents.
Hespeakstobanks,hospitals,governmentinstitutions,ITcorporationsandprisons,andhehasaddressedmorethan500universitiesandschoolsaroundtheworld.
Andrew’stopicsinclude:
attitudedealingwithdisastersembracingchangelife/workbalanceprosperityandsuccess.
Contact:
ForenquiriesandtoengageAndrewMatthews:Email:[email protected]:+61740556966www.andrewmatthews.com
References1Hill,Napoleon.ThinkandGrowRich.Cleveland,Ohio:TheRalstonPublishingCo,1953.
2Maltz,Maxwell.Psycho-Cybernetics.PocketBooks,1989.
3Bristol,ClaudeM.TheMagicofBelieving:TheScienceofSettingYourGoalandThenReachingIt.Fireside,1991.
4Peale,NormanV.ThePowerofPositiveThinking.FawcettColumbine,1952.
5PhotographsreproducedbypermissionofDrMasaruEmoto.
6McTaggart,Lynne.TheIntentionExperiment.FreePress,2007,p24.
7Rein,GlenandMcCraty,Rollin.StructuralchangesinwaterandDNAassociatedwithnewphysiologicallymeasurablestates.JournalofScientificExploration.1994;8(3):438-439.
8Eddington,Arthur.TheNatureofthePhysicalWorld.Macmillan,1935.
9Hawking,Stephen:IntotheUniverse,Series1:Episode3(4:16)
10Gawain,Shakti.CreativeVisualisation,WhateverPublishing,1978pages8and10.
11Goddard,Neville.FeelingistheSecret.BNPublishing,2007,page19.
12Douglas-Klotz,Neil(trans).PrayersoftheCosmos:MeditationsontheAramaicWordsofJesus.SanFrancisco:Harper,1994,p.86-87.
13Braden,Gregg.SecretsoftheLostModeofPrayer.HayHouse,2006,pp7-8.
14Matthew,13:12.
15Goddard,Neville.FeelingistheSecret.BNPublishing,2007,pages16and21.
16Pauli,Wolfgang.Relationbetweentheclosinginofelectron-groupsintheatomandthestructureofcomplexesinthespectrum.ZeitschriftfurPhysik.1925;31:765-783.
17Hill,Napoleon.ThinkandGrowRich.Cleveland,Ohio:TheRalstonPublishingCo,1953.
18FictionalcharactersfromGeorgeLucas’sfilm,StarWars,1977.
19TheVoice,NineNetworkTelevision,Australia,2013.
20Matthews,Andrew.BeingHappy!MediaMasters,Singapore,1988.
21JimCarrey.InterviewinMovieline,July,1994.
22Matthews,Andrew.BeingHappy!MediaMasters,Singapore,1988.
23Matthew5:39.
24Trudeau,Kevin.YourWishIsYourCommand,14CDaudioset,GlobalInformationNetwork,2009.
25FoundationforInnerPeace.ACourseinMiracles.2nded.NewYork:VikingPenguin,1996.Lesson243.
26Moseley,J.Bruce,etal.Acontrolledtrialforarthroscopicsurgeryoftheknee,NewEnglandJournalofMedicine,2002;347:81-88.
27Moseley,Bruce.60Minutesinterview,29November,2012.
28Lipton,Bruce.TheBiologyofBelief:UnleashingthePowerof
Consciousness,Matter&Miracles.HayHouse,2011.
29Ibid,p.42.
30Pert,Candace.MoleculesofEmotion.SimonandSchuster,1997,p189.
31Pearsall,Paul.TheHeart’sCode.Broadway,1998,p65.
32Ibid.
33Ibid.
34Sylvia,Claire.AChangeofHeart.WarnerBooks,1998.
35Pearsall,Paul.TheHeart’sCode.Broadway,1998,p7.
36Orme-JohnsonD,AlexanderC,DaviesJ,ChandlerH,LarimoreW.InternationalPeaceProjectintheMiddleEast:TheeffectsoftheMaharishiTechnologyoftheUnifiedField.JournalofConflictResolution.1988;32(4):776-812.
37InternationalPeaceProjectintheMiddleEast:TheEffectsofMaharishiTechnologyoftheUnifiedField.TheJournalofConflictResolution,Vol32,No4,Dec.1988.
38Byrd,RC,Ph.D.,Positivetherapeuticeffectsofintercessoryprayerinacoronarycareunitpopulation.SouthernMedicalJournal.1988;81:826-829.
39McTaggart,Lynne.TheIntentionExperiment.FreePress,2007,p23.
40TheSecretLifeofPlants,Part2of4,interviewwithCleveBackster,http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYksxtB0w8U,(0:47)
41Lipton,BruceH.TheBiologyofBelief.HayHouse,2005,pp155.
42Yogananda,Paramahansa.AutobiographyofaYogi.Self-RealizationFellowship,1948.
43Matthew18:3.
44Mitchell,Edgar.Astheparadigmshifts:Twodecadesofconsciousnessresearch.NoeticSciencesReview.1992;24:p.7.Notes