help for asking for help

8/8/2019 Help for Asking for Help

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Help for Asking for Helpby Rick Brenner

When we ask for help, from peers or from those with organizational power, wehave some choices. How we go about it can determine whether we get the help weneed, in time for the help to help.

arigold was now hopelessly late, which is why Andrew was now sitting in Jane'soffice, asking for advice. "So you think asking Emmons for help is the way to

break the news," he said.

"Yup," said Jane. "Worked for me."

Absorbing this, Andrew realized that Jane probably knew how to go about it. "OK, but

how can I make sure we get the help we need, and not what he thinks we need?""Easy," Jane said, "you do your homework first. Show him what's going on and why,compressing it to keep his attention while you lay out the story. You have to make itinteresting."

"Sounds good, but how?"

"Start by asking him for ten minutes that should be enough. Then youlay out theheadline, and go from there."

Jane has just given Andrew three of the keys for asking for help successfully. Here areten tips for asking for help. Work with your peersbefore you go upwardsin the organization

Do everything you can do firstAsk for help only after you've done what you can in your own circle of autonomy.Work out whatever you can with your peers before you go upwards in theorganization.

Choose your forumIf your needing help would be embarrassing to you or to anyone you ask for help,

think carefully about the forum in which you make the request. Be discrete.Ask permissionWork out a mutually agreeable time and setting for making your request.

Ask earlyThe temptation to delay is strong, because we often hope that the problem willresolve itself. Resist temptation. If you wait until panic sets in, you riskforeclosing options.

Deliver the headline first
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Begin with the big idea don't build up to it. For instance, Andrew could say,"Marigold will be late, and I need your help."

Organize your optionsHave in mind at least a couple of kinds of help. The third one can always be: "Canyou suggest something else?"

Have a clear objectiveDefine the problem, and then describe the solution you have in mind. Whetheryou need advice, expertise, or resources, ask for it specifically. Be clear, but beopen to alternatives.

Explore alternate solutionsBe prepared to justify the solution you've selected, but be ready to explorealternatives. People tend to feel uncomfortable about helping the unprepared orthe narrow-minded.

Make it interestingPresent your problem in an intriguing way. You'll be presenting a solution, too, sotouch hot buttons that will intrigue the listener.

Use what you getBecause rejecting or ignoring help you've asked for can create real problems, beprepared to accept the help that's offered.

Bi 9: asking for help and offering help(xin gip )Cp nht: 15/12/2009 - 04:13 GMT-6

Tham gia tho lun bi ny Bn in

John Hardie va mi ti Melbourne v ng mun thu mt bung khch sn. Bi hithoi gia ng Hardie v c tip vin khch sn c chia lm ba phn.

Click vo y nghe

Part 1 - THE DIALOGUES (i thoi)

Dialogue 1:

RECEPTIONIST: Good afternoon, Sir. May I help you?Mr. HARDIE: Yes, I'd like a room, please.RECEPTIONIST: Have you got a booking?Mr. HARDIE: No, I haven't.RECEPTIONIST: Well, just a moment, please. I've got a single room with bath.Mr. HARDIE: That's fine.RECEPTIONIST: May I have your name, please?Mr. HARDIE: Hardie, John Hardie H-A-R-D-I-E.
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Mr. HARDIE: Sure.RECEPTIONIST: And would you mind printing in block letters?Mr. HARDIE: All right. There you are.RECEPTIONIST: Thank you. And would you mind signing your name please, MrHardie?

Mr. HARDIE: Certainly.Dialogue 2:

ng Hardie nh c tip vin ni cho bit u bn qu lu nim a phng.

RECEPTIONIST: Good morning. May I help you?Mr. HARDIE: Yes, I want to get some souvenirs. Where should I go?RECEPTIONIST: Try the big department stores in Bourke Street.Mr. HARDIE: Bourke Street, eh? How do I get there?RECEPTIONIST: You can catch a bus outside the hotel.

Dialogue 3:

ng Hardie ni chuyn vi ngi li xe tc-xi trn ng i v khch sn. ng l ngithuc bang Queensland, mt bang nm pha bc Australia ni ting v du lch v khhu tt. Ngi li xe tc-xi cng l ngi thuc bang Queensland v l ngi hay ni.

Mr. HARDIE: Travelodge, please.DRIVER: Right. Are you staying at the Travelodge?Mr. HARDIE: Yes.DRIVER: How long have you been in Melbourne?Mr. HARDIE: Since Monday Hey! Look out!DRIVER: Hm and where are you from?Mr. HARDIE: Queensland.DRIVER: Queensland, eh? Me, too! Great place, Queensland great weatherMr. HARDIE: Look out! Would you mind stopping here, please?DRIVER: Great beaches in Queensland, tooMr. HARDIE: Would you stop here, please?DRIVER: Great foodMr. HARDIE: Driver, stop here!DRIVER: This isn't the Travelodge.Mr. HARDIE: I know. I suddenly feel like walking to the hotel. How much is that?

Part 3 - LESSON (bi hc)

1. Polite ways to ask someone to do something for you (mu cu lch s dng khi nghai gip mnh lm mt vic g.)

May I have your name, please?


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Yes. Certainly.Would you sign here, please? Yes. Sure.

Would you mind signing here, please? No. Not at all. Certainly. All right.Do you mind helping me? No. Not at all. O.K.Xin bn ch n nhng cch ngh di y:

Would you + verb? Lm nMt mu cu ngh lch s dng khi mun nh ai gip mnh lm mt vic g.Would you mind + verb + ing?Nu khng c g phin, xin lm nMt mu cu ngh khc - lch s hncch ni trc.Do you mind + verb + ing?Nu khng c g phin, xin lm nMt cch ni thng thng khi mun t li ngh.

Nhn chung, ngi ta thng chp nhn cc cu ngh kiu trn. Bi l ngi nithng bit chc chn rng ngi nghe s chp nhn yu cu ca mnh, nu khng h khng ni nh vy. Sau y l nhng cch tr li: Of course not Certainly not Not at allKhng sao. tr li nhng cu ngh trn khi bnng lm theo li yu cu.

2. Polite ways to offer to help someone (cc mu cu lch s dng khi mun gip ngi khc.)

Can I give you a hand? Ti c gip bn c khng?(cc bn xem li bi hc s 8)

trong cc ca hng, chng ta thng s nghe nhng cu hi v tr li sau:

May I help you? Yes, I'm looking for No, thanks. I'm just having a look.Are you right?


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Well, I'm looking for Yes, thanks. I'm just having a look.

3. Talking to strangers in Vietnam (ni chuyn vi ngi l Vit Nam.)

Bn c th hi cc ngi nc ngoi cu hi sau:How long have you been in Vietnam? I've been here since July I've been here for a month

How long have you been l cu trc ng php ca th hin ti hon thnh. Nh vy ccbn cn nh, th hin ti hon thnh bao hm mi lin quan ca hnh ng, t qu khcho ti hin ti.

I came here a year ago and I'm still here Ti n y nm ngoi v li cho n by gi.

I've been here for a year. Ti y c mt nm ri.I've been here since last year. Ti y t nm ngoi (n by gi)Ch :Since ch r hnh ng c bt u ti mt thi im c th trong qu kh v tip tcdin ra cho ti hin ti.For ch r thi gian l bao lu.

4. Conversation devices (nhng cu m trong i thoi)

Nhng cu tr li sau c nhiu ngha ty theo ng cnh

Sure. Vng. c, ti ng . ng vy. Ti hiu.All right. Vng, ti ng . Th cng c.There you are. Xong ri y. Ti va lm xong. Ti va lm xong vic m bn nh ti.

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