healing the heart week 3

Healing the Heartand

Freedom From AddictionsPastor Susan Fochler

Week 3

Heart SyncAllowing the Truth of our Being to become the Way of our Being

Functional Emotional

GuardianOriginal Self

Guardians:

Self-protective strategies we’ve developed to help feel safe.

Corresponds to the Amygdala: Fight or Flight Response

Addiction

What it is,Why we do it,

And How to Heal from it

Guardians+ Apparently Normal: play it safe + Religious, self-righteousness+ Angry: Intimidate+ Obsessive-Compulsive, perfectionism+ Co-Dependent: Control others+ Self-Punishing+ Confusion: Overwhelmed+ Numb: Avoid+ Addiction

AddictionAny pattern of behavior or thought that is used

in an attempt to satisfy deep heart needs to feel comforted or safe.

Cycles that emerge in our lives when we cannot relieve our pain and anxiety through loving and intimate connection with people

(and God). KYLO Danny Silk

Belong>Believe>BehaveThe true problem is not the addictive behavior.

Behavior has it’s roots in our Belief system, and our Belief system has it’s roots in our sense of how we feel we Belong. (or not)

The pain of not feeling like we belong is so devastating, that we use more superficial behaviors or beliefs to numb the discomfort.

Addiction is a form of Control

We can “control” the alcohol, drugs, gambling, sex, pornography, shopping, working; all activities designed to keep us feeling safe and cared for. We don’t believe our hearts can feel cared for without engaging in this activity, and can feel overwhelming unmet pain without the guardian Addiction stepping forward.

The Solution is to allow God to establish a Belonging centered in

Him

Ps 63:1,5: O God, You are my God, earnestly will I seek You; my flesh longs and is faint for You, in a dry and weary land where no water is. My whole being shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness; and my mouth shall praise You with joyful lips.

Shame Reinforces the Addiction

Is 51:3 For the Lord will comfort Zion, He will comfort all her waste places. And He will make Her wilderness like Eden, and her desert like the garden of the Lord. Joy and gladness will be found in her.

God Created us for Enjoyment and Pleasure

In your Presence is fullness of joy; at your right hand pleasures forevermore. Ps 16:11

I will continue beholding Your face in righteousness; I shall be fully satisfied, when I awake beholding Your form, and having sweet communion with You. Ps. 17:15

Why do we Get so Stuck?

- We don’t like this part of our heart: - Self-hatred- Lack of self-awareness- Inability/unwillingness to Face Pain- We prefer denial to truth

The Strategy for Healing

Allowing a part of the Heart long walled off to experience Honor, Kindness and

Empathy, often for the first time.

The Goal is to communicate value and honor to each “part” of that person, including dysfunctional qualities. Recognize the dysfunction (anger, hatred, denial, confusion, etc.) is there for a reason.

We Reconcile these different “parts” through synchronization

First Step: As the prayer minister, ask permission to connect to the presenting part. We have no agenda, no pressure. This “part” has never known acceptance before. Give language to their purpose, their “job”.


Next, Synchronize: empathize and help that “part” know they are valued, have purpose, are needed. Very often they need to know they aren’t “bad”. Even anger is there for a reason. Honor with patience.


Third, engage a dialogue by finding out how the “part” feels about Jesus, feels about the rest of the person. Utilize open-ended questions and “Listening Prayer”.


We can leave behind parts of our hearts holding feelings that are overwhelmingly painful. We were a child trying hard to figure out difficult situations. These parts were needed to help process and handle things as best as we could.

Internal Reconciliation:

Synchronize

Validate how they feel, and why they’ve done the “job” they’ve done. They

were angry, sad, shut down, etc. for a very good reason. Recognition of what

they have done to help protect the heart is a powerful experience.

ReconciliationEngaging in open ended questions, understanding

areas of conflict and misunderstanding.

Releasing TraumaHeaviness, Grief, Responsibility, Violence

Infilling with Holy Spirit

We have walled off internally and unconsciously when we were in conflicting and uncomfortable situations that evoked very excruciating emotions that we didn’t know how to handle.

Internal Reconciliation: Reconciliation within the person

via Self-Synchronization

Synchronize

They were alone to figure out how to

protect their heart. Letting Guardian know

Jesus wants to be in relationship, helping

and loving.

Deliverance from Cosmic Beings

Jesus has authority over beings such as “rule, authority, power and dominion”. We

have authority over demons.

We ask Jesus to InterveneThe prayer is based on asking Jesus to exert His

authority, instead of taking authority for ourselves.

healing the heart week 3

Spiritual