FloatingSheep in Missoula,

MT

Days 1 and 2

I had booked a compact car, wanting to be budget conscious. At the rental counter I showed the polite agent mymenacing sheep, who looks all-business. She quickly relented and handed me the keys to an SUV well above whatmy price point was – at no charge. The FloatingSheep was now ready to roll!

I first came across the FloatingSheep on this deposited log. Most geomorphologists would think this was carried down the river by a large flood. But arguably the sheep has helium power, and was able to deposit it in place. To give you some idea of the magnitude of this feat, I later saw some drunken UMT students attempting to nudge this log. They failed.

A single log was no match for the FloatingSheep… Here is a log jam he created along a side channel of theClark Fork River – ovine efficiency at its finest!

The FloatingSheep owns Missoula and all its associated waterways.

I had kept a pretty tight leash on the FloatingSheep all day, but the one moment I let him out of my sight he windsup sitting on top of this sign. Whatever he may have been trying to communicate was ominous, but then I realized it was a mere practical joke. I remembered the balloon, and decided to hang up on the psychiatrist I had called. Even if hewanted to jump he couldn’t – silly sheep! He should be aware of his ontological constraints.

In a moment of pretentiousness the FloatingSheep spotted this lone sandal adjacent to the riverbank. In afit of artistic inspiration he posed for a shot, calling it a stunning mediation on the ephemerality of human materialityperched against the bricolage of enforced nature. It conveys a sense of fleetingness, no? Sublime ecstasy!

Not only does the FloatingSheep own the city, he comes into such sharp contrast against its backdrop, and thedistant mountains that we can say he positively dematerializes the presence, and possibility, of landscape.

Most commentators (including myself) have underestimated the power of the FloatingSheep – He can alsosingle-handedly carry out river restoration and rearrange entire floodplains. Here we see him carefully guardinghis work, telling all visitors to fuck off – this is his territory!

Some minor trespassing may have been involved in the capture of this photo. But the FloatingSheep impelledme to do it. In fact, he even suggested focusing on the middle- and background, leading to the blurry distortion of his Sheep-Dasein. A lovely panorama – but when he suggested that he had created the entire valley and thesurrounding mountains, I said he was absurd, and that he should cut it out, and asked if he knew what mutton was.