fall 2013: week 8
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Parenting: Our hearts His Plan. Fall 2013: Week 8. Influence vs. Control . Authority. Parenting: beginning / end!. Guidelines, flexibility, release. Structure and Controlled. Train up a child…. - PowerPoint PPT PresentationTRANSCRIPT
Parenting: Our hearts His PlanFall 2013: Week 8
Influence vs. Control
Authority
Infant 3-5 years 6-10 years 11-14 years 15-18 years Adults0
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4
5
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ControlInfluence
Parenting: beginning / end!
Structure and ControlledGuidelines, flexibility, release
Train up a child…
“Train up a child in the way he should go and even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
Proverbs 22:6
Living the journey with them….
Train up a child…Love the LORD your God with:
• all your heart • all your soul • all your might.
You shall • teach them diligently to your children, • talk of them when you sit in your house, • when you walk by the way• when you lie down• when you rise.
You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes.
Deuteronomy 6:5-8
BOUNDARIESStage Goal Training
Birth – 2• Can I trust you?• Who is in charge?
Trust Establish Routines• Set a schedule• Be the parent
3-5 years• Are you watching me?• Who do I belong to?
Security Offer Recognition• Pay attention• Show ownership
6-12 years• Do you really love me?• Are you real?
Obedience Build Relationship• Be a good listener• Be authentic
13-19 years• Who am I?• Can I be in charge?
Self-Respect Give Responsibility• Enable self-discovery• Transfer accountability
Adults• I am God’s
Man / woman after Christ’s heart
Come along beside of them, Friendship, Mentor
• Does it matter?• Have you considered this question?• Have you done anything to answer it?• What should you do with it?•
What does it mean to be a part of the “____Family”?
Dotson Family Constitution
• My God• My Family• Family Development and Growth• Loving Your Neighbor• Communication
Dotson Family Constitution: Family Development and Growth
Galatians 5:22 The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.
We will encourage the development and growth of the fruits of the spirit in one another by nurturing…
• Positive self-image: Psalms 139:14 – each is fearfully and wonderfully made• Journey of self-awareness : understanding, encouragement and development of
one another’s gifts and talents.• Serving others: look beyond “self” and consider God’s unique purpose and plan for
each in His unfolding Kingdom story.
Dotson Family Constitution: Respect and Value Others
John 13:34 A new commandment I give to you that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.
Matthew 22:37-39 ‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’
Hebrews 12:14 Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy.
Lying, cheating, stealing, dishonest are not acceptable.
“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” Winston Churchill.
Dotson Family Constitution: Communication
Colossians 4:6 Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to respond to each person.
James 1:19 Let everyone be quick to hear, slow to speak, and as a result slow to anger, for man’s anger does not ring about the righteous life that God desires.
Proverbs 15:1 A gentle word turns away anger, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
• We will actively seek to understand one another’s viewpoint.• Integrity of intent – thinking the best of one another.
Shepherds of Your TeamName Jim Ann Hillary Bennett Hunter
Strengths Maximizer Responsibility Learner Significance
Competition Harmony Empathy Restorative
Belief Consistency Achiever Deliberative
Woo Belief Includer Belief
Individualizer Context Futuristic Competition
D.A.R.E 7 6 1 14 6
12 14 12 4 7
8 28 29 7 30
24 2 8 24 7
Motivator Affection Time Gifts Fun Affirmation
Recognition Public 1:1 Written Public 1:1
Learning Style
Observe Read Read Doing Doing
Love Language
Words of Encouragement / Affection
Time / Undivided Attention
Words of Encouragement / Time
Words of Encouragemnt
Words of Encouragemnt