@julius_s_malema You knowyou from Limpopowhen you wear apurple suit inMauritius. Ignant!

Dr Murray need-ed Michael Hulley,the guy who gotZuma’s 349 corrup-tion chargesdropped.Involentory (sic)manslaughter myass!

I curse the personwho thought itwould be a goodidea to have acamera on a phone.

People like to saythe book was betterthan the movie, tosound well read,I say if there is amovie fuck thebook.

When download-ing they alway askif I agree. I don’tread the thing I justagree. The last timedisagreed it [took]20 more minutes.I fucken agree!

Calm down. SteveJobs was not yourfriend.

When you loseyour job becauseyou took a day offto protest for Julius6 months later youwill protest sayingthere are no job[s].

I hate the factas a black personI can’t be openlyupset about apart-heid.

comic relief

A seriously funny guyComedian Loyiso Gola is known for his witty take on all things South African. The funny-man told SUSAN SMIT about the year that was and who he will be poking fun at in 2012

SA is an interesting place. Whoprovided most material this year?Probably Julius Malema.

And next year?Probably the president [Jacob Zuma]because he is fighting for his politicallife at the moment in the organisa-tion. They want him out and blah blahblah . . .

If you could have a portfolio in cabi­net which one would you choose?Probably the National PlanningCommission – the one Trevor [Man-uel] has.It’s the one with the most responsi-

bility, I assume.You delegate, you oversee. I wouldn’t

want to have one department. I wouldwant to be on top of things.

Which jokes were major hits andmisses this year?Anything current, anything that washappening at the time audiences liked.

What gag didn’t work? My Jesusgags still don’t work.

People are too sensitive about reli-gion; they just don’t laugh at religiousthings.

Sports minister Fikile Mbalula iscurrently implicated in a sex scan­dal. Do you think South Africansshould care about the sex lives ofour politicians?Well, it’s touch and go. The politicianswork for us so there has to be a certainlevel of trust for them to do their job.

Yet their private lives are none ofour business.

Part of their duty is to keep it a secret.

We don’t really care – but we docare.

Have you ever eaten sushi off anaked woman’s body?No, it’s unhygienic!

Do you have a partner?Yes.

If you didn’t have one, seeing thatKim Kardashian is now single, wouldyou go out with her?She’s hot but she seems retarded.

Any New Year’s resolutions?I need to exercise more. I have pickedup loads of weight. That’s the one goalI try to do every day but I fail becauseI’m lazy. Career-wise I want to do acountrywide tour.

IN 2002 at the age of 19 Loyiso Gola leftCape Town for Joburg to pursue a ca­

reer in comedy.It wasn’t long before he was ap­

pearing at South Africa’s most im­portant comedy events, includingthe Cape Town InternationalComedy Festival.

His one­man show, Loyisa Gola forPresident, gained rave reviews

across Africa and in 2007 he won theSouth African Comedy Award.

Gola makes many TV appearances andhad a cameo in comedy film Bunny Chow.He currently hosts the politically themedsatirical Late Night News on e.tv, with anestimated 1,5 million weekly viewers.

His DVD, Loyiso Gola: Life & Times – ACelebration of 10 Years in Comedy, iscurrently available.

He’s no social net­work wallflower

Loyiso’stweets:

About Loyiso Gola

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extra sources: entertainment-online.co.za

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Loyiso Golahas beencomparedto top UScomedianssuch asChris Rockand DaveChappelle.

The interview