do all you can to save that marriage

DO ALL YOU CAN TO SAVE THAT MARRIAGE

The Marriage Institution is under great attack and the numbers of those either

separating or divorcing is on the increase. The effects of separation and divorce are

enormous and particularly on the children. Do all that you can to save that marriage

Kigume KaruriTuesday, October 31, 2017 1

• Marriage is wonderful because it brings two completely different people together to create a new relationship. It comes with personal and social benefits, and the ability to satisfy one’s emotional, social and physical needs.

Tuesday, October 31, 2017 Kigume Karuri 2

• Though married life has its ups and downs, living alone is not so easy either. All of us need someone with whom to share our feelings, dreams, and frustrations. We also need someone to support us through the hard times.


• Marriage enables you to bring up your kids in an ideal environment. This is one of the main reasons why people prefer to save marriage rather than pursue divorce and separation.


• Children require the love and attention of both parents. If they miss out on the love of one parent, they will be more prone to psychological and social problems in the future.


• If you have decided to save your marriage, then you must work with your spouse to create practical solutions for resolving your marital conflict.


• The most important thing is to:

• 1. Find the root cause of your marriage problems.

• 2. Communicate with your spouse. Tell them how you feel and what you think about the situation.

• 3. Remember to give him/her a chance to speak. Listen.


• 4. Love and intimacy are vital for saving a marriage and restoring the relationship.

• 5. Work on healing any rift and create deeper intimacy with your spouse and you will be pleasantly surprised how easy it becomes to solve other marriage problems.

• 6. Seek skills required to repair the emotional damage caused by your marriage problems.


• Separation and divorce exact a price that many, many people say in retrospect is just too costly. In fact, do whatever it takes to save your marriage now. So don’t wait. Take action.


• The personal cost to you right now emotionally, physically and financially is high as you try to survive the conflict. But it will be a whole lot more expensive later on if you and your spouse call it quits.


• Once the honey moon phase passes, things go downhill, eventually leading to chronic relationship problems and a struggle to save the marriage. Bitterness turns into battles when tolerance levels are exceeded.


• When this happens, many couples put divorce or separation on the table as an option.

• But before making this decision, consider the consequences. And then decide to do whatever it takes or whatever it costs to save your marriage.


• Repairing emotional damage is very necessary. Not only will this save the marriage, but it will enable you to completely recover from the mistakes you have made.


• Apologizing can save a marriage. A sincere apology from the heart such as saying; “I’m sorry, what I did was wrong and stupid. Please forgive me” can go along way in healing your marriage.


• If you want to have a better marriage then be honest with your spouse; share your fears and insecurities with them. This is a great way to improve understanding, closeness, and intimacy in your marriage.


• Listen to your spouse and again I say listen. Listening to your spouse is very important when you are trying to save a marriage. Just because you don’t agree with their point of view doesn’t mean they’re wrong.

• To save your marriage, be an active listener.


• Be open and let your spouse know that you take responsibility for your mistakes.

• Find a common ground. Nothing destroys a happy marriage faster than focusing on your differences. To save a marriage you should choose to focus on what the two of you have in common.


• Move to the next level and avoid repeating the same mistakes over and over again. Show your spouse that you are trying to change and they will appreciate it.

• Don’t make promises to quiet your spouse. Follow through on what you say you will do.



• Deal with disagreements productively.

• If you can see that endless disagreements are driving you and your spouse apart and creating a wall of separation, find a way to call a truce so that you can break through and be intimate again.

• Finally

• You can save your marriage. You have to quickly learn to adjust in all marital situations. We come into the marriage institution as two people who have never been together before, have different back grounds and have a life to live together until death separates them.


• Allow your spouse to be real and stand

with them in real life challenges.


• Go an extra kilometre because of your spouse. You can forfeit all because of him/her.

• Your spouse would not forget the sacrifices you have had because of him/her.


DO ALL YOU CAN TO SAVE THAT MARRIAGE.IT WILL PAY DIVIDENDS

IN THE ENDTuesday, October 31, 2017 Kigume Karuri 23

do all you can to save that marriage

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