develop character, deepen relationships tools for daily...

Develop Character, Deepen Relationships…Tools for

Daily Growth

Mountville Mennonite Church

Retreat at Camp HebronFebruary 12-14, 2016

with Mervin Charles

Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series:

…Tools for Daily Growth

Develop Character, Deepen RelationshipsReview 4


• Begin with a Biblical principle.





• Express this principle in a practical tool that…






• Develops our character (our inner core) to become more like Jesus;







• Deepens our relationships, becoming more open, transparent, healthy, constructive, and giving;







• Deepens our relationships, becoming more open, transparent, healthy, constructive, and giving; and…

• Can be used as helpful for daily growth.



Biblical principle:Each of you should look

not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Express this principle in a practical tool:Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument

(How much energy do I give to meeting my interests/concerns, your interests/concerns?)


Develop Character, Deepen RelationshipsReview 4 – Tool #1

3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit,but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests,

but also to the interests of others.

5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus…Philippians 2:3-5 (NIV1984)



High

High

Avoiding

Competing

Accommodating

Collaborating

Compromising

How much energy do I give to meetingYOUR INTERESTS?

How much energydo I give to meetingMY INTERESTS?

YOURINTERESTS

MYINTERESTS



Using this Tool

• For this tool to work, you need to identify the following:

• What are my interests and/or concerns?

• What are your interests and/or concerns?

• Both of the above need to be “placed on the table.”

• This is an act of trust (in God, and in others), and requires openness, transparency, self-awareness, communication skills, and concern for others.



Biblical principle:As Jesus modeled for us, we are to release our rights

into the hands of our loving heavenly Father, trusting God to meet those rights in His way and time,

while partnering with God in active, trusting obedience.Express this principle in a practical tool:

A 7-Step Prayer for an Attitude(How can I follow the example of Jesus who daily lived by

entrusting rights and accepting responsibilities?)



5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider

equality with God something to be grasped; 7 but made himself nothing [emptied himself]…

he humbled himself and became obedient to death…9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place

and gave him the name that is above every name…to the glory of God the Father.

Philippians 2:9-11 (NIV1984)

Philippians 2:5-8 (NIV1984)



12

34

5

.

67

Identify

Decide

ReleaseWorship & Rest

Receive

Commit

Walk (with a new

attitude)



Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.

TRUST and OBEY

• (Counted cross-stitch)

• “In His Hands”

Do you see

yourself?



12

34

5

.

67

Identify

Decide

ReleaseWorship & Rest

Receive

Commit

Walk (with a new

attitude)

Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.



Biblical principle:Do not judge, or jump to conclusions.

With humility recognize what you do not know.Live daily with a wisdom “open to entreaty.”

Express this principle in a practical tool:Identify Your Working Assumptions

(With humility, accountability, and transparencydiscern between assumptions and conclusions.)



Quick Tagline:

Identify your Working Assumptions!

Challenge:

Thinking in different, new, creative ways

Develop Character, Deepen RelationshipsDon’t Judge…But You May Assume


Identify your “Working Assumptions!”

In sharing this tool, which I’ve used intentionally and frequently over the past nine or ten years, I’d like to do two things: Give you PA

• Give you PERMISSION TO ASSUME

• Give you ADVICE ABOUT HOW TO DO SO WISELY

• I hope to use some things to help you remember. :)


Develop Character, Deepen RelationshipsReview 4: Tool #3

Experience: Observe:Ask

Questions:Consider Answers:

Identify “Working Assumptions”:

Draw Firm Conclusions:



A fool finds no delight in understanding,but only in expressing his opinion.

Proverbs 18:2 (TLB)

Understanding a person’s thoughts is as hard as getting water from a deep well.

But someone with understanding can find the wisdom there.Proverbs 20:5 (ICB)

A person’s thoughts are like water in a deep well,but someone with insight can draw them out.

Proverbs 20:5 (GNT)



Biblical principle:There is a treasure to be found

for those who would seek itthrough thoughtful, caring, intentional listening

Express this principle in a practical tool:Listening to Learn

(Imagine that you’re thirsty, and there’s refreshing waterat the bottom of a deep well.)



Develop Character, Deepen RelationshipsDrinking Daily from the Saucer


Biblical principle:Giving thanks…being grateful…honors God, encourages others,

and transforms me. Express this principle in a practical tool:

Drink daily from the saucer!(How can I live a life of daily gratitude?)

Philippians 2:12-18

develop character, deepen relationships tools for daily...

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