Desperate for Desperate for RelationshipRelationship

Genesis 2:18-25Genesis 2:18-25

““It is harder to lead a family than to It is harder to lead a family than to rule a nation.” - Chinese Proverbrule a nation.” - Chinese Proverb

“ “Leading a family through the chaos Leading a family through the chaos of American culture is like leading a of American culture is like leading a small patrol through enemy-small patrol through enemy-occupied territory.”-Steve Farrar, occupied territory.”-Steve Farrar, author on family life issuesauthor on family life issues

Amazing FactsAmazing Facts

2 out of 3 marriages end in divorce.2 out of 3 marriages end in divorce. 54% of first time marriages end in 54% of first time marriages end in

divorce in the first 3 years.divorce in the first 3 years. 64% of first time marriages end in 64% of first time marriages end in

divorce in the first 7 years.divorce in the first 7 years. 75% of all second time marriages end 75% of all second time marriages end

in divorce.in divorce. 92% of all third time marriages end in 92% of all third time marriages end in

divorce.divorce.

Amazing FactsAmazing Facts Tonight, enough teenagers to fill the Rose Tonight, enough teenagers to fill the Rose

Bowl, Cotton Bowl, Sugar Bowl, Orange Bowl, Cotton Bowl, Sugar Bowl, Orange Bowl, Fiesta Bowl, and the average Super Bowl, Fiesta Bowl, and the average Super Bowl will practice prostitution to support Bowl will practice prostitution to support drug addictions.drug addictions.

66% of all church-involved teenagers are 66% of all church-involved teenagers are sexually active.sexually active.

66% of American high school seniors have 66% of American high school seniors have used illegal drugs.used illegal drugs.

Every 78 seconds, a teenager in America Every 78 seconds, a teenager in America attempts suicide.attempts suicide.

Genesis 2:18-25Genesis 2:18-25

The LORD God said, "It is not good The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." a helper suitable for him." Now the LORD God had formed out Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, the man called each living creature, that was its name. that was its name.

Genesis 2:18-25Genesis 2:18-25

So the man gave names to all the So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. the beasts of the field.  But for Adam no suitable helper was  But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the LORD God caused the found. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh.place with flesh.

Genesis 2:18-25Genesis 2:18-25

Then the LORD God made a woman Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. man, and he brought her to the man.

The man said, The man said,        "This is now bone of my bones        "This is now bone of my bones        and flesh of my flesh;        and flesh of my flesh;        she shall be called 'woman, '        she shall be called 'woman, '        for she was taken out of man."        for she was taken out of man."

Genesis 2:18-25Genesis 2:18-25

For this reason a man will leave his For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one his wife, and they will become one flesh. flesh.

The man and his wife were both The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.naked, and they felt no shame.

The Other SideThe Other Side

95% of the boys say their fathers 95% of the boys say their fathers regularly tell them, “I love you.”regularly tell them, “I love you.”

95% of the girls say their mothers 95% of the girls say their mothers tell them regularly, “I‘m proud of tell them regularly, “I‘m proud of you” or “You’re doing a great job.”you” or “You’re doing a great job.”

94% say their fathers attend their 94% say their fathers attend their athletic events.athletic events.

97% of the boys say they get hugs 97% of the boys say they get hugs from their dads.from their dads.

The Other SideThe Other Side

100% of the girls say they get hugs 100% of the girls say they get hugs from their moms and dads.from their moms and dads.

Recalling their childhood, 100% of Recalling their childhood, 100% of the girls remember having stories the girls remember having stories read to them by their mothers. 85% read to them by their mothers. 85% of the boys recall having stories read of the boys recall having stories read to them by their dads.to them by their dads.

The Other SideThe Other Side

89% of the boys say their fathers 89% of the boys say their fathers take them fishing.take them fishing.

100% of the girls say their parents 100% of the girls say their parents have taken them to church.have taken them to church.

ResultsResults

80% of these children say there are 80% of these children say there are against premarital sex.against premarital sex.

92% do not use illegal drugs.92% do not use illegal drugs. Majority do not drink alcohol.Majority do not drink alcohol.

AN ATTITUDE OF HONORAN ATTITUDE OF HONOR

But for Adam no suitable helper was But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the LORD God caused the found. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. brought her to the man.

AN ATTITUDE OF HONORAN ATTITUDE OF HONOR

The man said, The man said,   "This is now bone of my bones   "This is now bone of my bones

and flesh of my flesh; and flesh of my flesh;   she shall be called 'woman, '   she shall be called 'woman, '

for she was taken out of man." for she was taken out of man."

God speaks to husbands:God speaks to husbands:

““Husbands, in the same way be Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your so that nothing will hinder your prayers”prayers”

- 1 Peter 3:7 - 1 Peter 3:7

God speaks to wivesGod speaks to wives

““Wives, submit to your husbands as Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in should submit to their husbands in everything.”everything.”

- Ephesians 5:22-24- Ephesians 5:22-24

God speaks to childrenGod speaks to children

““Children, obey your parents in the Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother -which is the first father and mother -which is the first commandment with a promise- that commandment with a promise- that it may go well with you and that you it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”may enjoy long life on the earth.”

- Ephesians - Ephesians 6:1-36:1-3

AN ATTITUDE OF HONORAN ATTITUDE OF HONOR

Honor each other.Honor each other. What is honor? It is What is honor? It is respectrespect and and

esteemesteem shown to another. shown to another.

Showing HonorShowing Honor

Demonstrate a regard for their Demonstrate a regard for their presencepresence..

Engage them as a person of Engage them as a person of significancesignificance..

Listen until they are Listen until they are heardheard..

Showing HonorShowing Honor

Here are the dashboard indicators Here are the dashboard indicators that your relationship may be in that your relationship may be in trouble: “trouble: “unhealthyunhealthy resentmentsresentments”.”.

A PLEDGE TO LOYALTYA PLEDGE TO LOYALTY

““For this reason a man will leave his For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one his wife, and they will become one flesh.flesh.

A PLEDGE TO LOYALTYA PLEDGE TO LOYALTY

The “leave & cleave” principle The “leave & cleave” principle means that you commit yourself to means that you commit yourself to the relationship as the the relationship as the primaryprimary relationshiprelationship in your life. in your life.

AffairAffair

““an escape from reality, or a search an escape from reality, or a search for meaning outside the marriage.”for meaning outside the marriage.”

A PLEDGE TO LOYALTYA PLEDGE TO LOYALTY

God intends married people to live God intends married people to live like married people. like married people.

Here is the dashboard indicator that Here is the dashboard indicator that your relationship may be in trouble: your relationship may be in trouble: ““emotionalemotional withdrawwithdraw”.”.

A COMMITMENT TO A COMMITMENT TO INTEGRITYINTEGRITY

““The man and the wife were both The man and the wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.”naked, and they felt no shame.”

Here is the dashboard indicator that Here is the dashboard indicator that your relationship may be in trouble: your relationship may be in trouble: ““nono trespassingtrespassing signs”. signs”.

ApplicationApplication

Do you have any dashboard Do you have any dashboard indicators lighting up in key indicators lighting up in key relationships in your life?relationships in your life?

Possible responses:Possible responses:

DuctDuct tapetape response response ToolTool response response EvaluateEvaluate the cause of the the cause of the

dashboard indicator and “fix” the dashboard indicator and “fix” the problem.problem.

How to EvaluateHow to Evaluate

Honor – may require some “drawing out” Honor – may require some “drawing out” conversation to be sure your actions are conversation to be sure your actions are not hurting those you love the most.not hurting those you love the most.

Loyalty – evaluation of resources (time, Loyalty – evaluation of resources (time, money and energy) to be sure your most money and energy) to be sure your most important relationships have all that is important relationships have all that is required.required.

Integrity – an inside look to evaluate the Integrity – an inside look to evaluate the real you and the invented you that real you and the invented you that everyone admires.everyone admires.