dear mum & dad

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  • 1. Dear Mum & DadSource: From Bringing Up Kids Without Tearing Them Down by Dr Kevin Leman (Pictures from the web)

2. 1. Dont spoil me. I know quite well that Iought not to have all I ask for. Im onlytesting you. 3. 2. Dont be afraid to be firm with me. I preferit. It lets me know where I stand. 4. 3. Dont use force with me. It teaches methat power is all that counts. I will respondmore readily to being led. 5. 4. Dont be inconsistent. That confuses meand makes me try harder to get away witheverything I can. 6. 5. Dont make promises you may not be able to keep them. That will discourage my trust in you. 7. 6. Dont fall for my provocations when I sayand do things just to upset you. Then Illtry for more such victories. 8. 7. Dont make me feel smaller than I am.I will make up for it by behaving like abig shot. 9. 8. Dont do things for me that I can do formyself. It makes me feel like a baby, and Imay continue to put you in my service. 10. 9. Dont let my bad habits get me a lotof your attention. It only encouragesme to continue them. 11. 10. Dont correct me in front of people. Ill take much more notice if you talk quietly with me in private. 12. 11. Dont try to discuss my behaviour inthe heat of a conflict. For some reasonmy hearing is not very good at this timeand my cooperation is even worse. It isall right to take the action required, butlets not talk about it until later. 13. 12. Dont preach to me. Youd be surprisedhow well I know whats right and wrong.. 14. 13. Dont make me feel that my mistakes are sins. I have to learn to make mistakes without feeling that I am no good. 15. 14. Dont nag. If you do, I shall have toprotect myself by appearing deaf. 16. 15. Dont demand explanations for mywrong behaviour. I really dont knowwhy I did it. 17. 16. Dont tax my honesty too much. I ameasily frightened into telling lies. 18. 17. Dont forget that I love to experiment. I learn from it, so please put up with it. 19. 18. Dont take too much notice of mysmall ailments. I may learn to enjoypoor health if it gets me muchattention. 20. 19. Dont put me off when I ask honestquestions. If you do, you will find that Istop asking and seek my informationelsewhere. 21. 20. Dont answer silly or meaningless questions. I just want you to keep busy with me. 22. 21. Dont ever think that it is beneath yourdignity to apologise to me. An honestapology makes me feel surprisingly warmtowards you. 23. 22. Dont ever suggest that you areperfect or infallible. It gives me toomuch to live up to. 24. 23. Dont let my fears arouse youranxiety. Then I will become more afraid.Show me courage. 25. 24. Dont forget that I cant thrive without lotsof understanding and encouragement, butI dont need to tell you that, do I? 26. The End


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