“dating na may dating”

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Dating na may Dating na may dating” dating” A Biblical and Practical A Biblical and Practical Study Study On dynamic dating On dynamic dating Rolan & Weng Monje Rolan & Weng Monje

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“Dating na may dating”. A Biblical and Practical Study On dynamic dating Rolan & Weng Monje. Some questions for tonight. What is the purpose of Christian dating? What is the heart behind dating? How can dating glorify God? What is the heart behind dating guidelines?. - PowerPoint PPT Presentation

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Page 1: “Dating na may dating”

““Dating na may Dating na may dating”dating”

A Biblical and Practical StudyA Biblical and Practical StudyOn dynamic datingOn dynamic dating

Rolan & Weng MonjeRolan & Weng Monje

Page 2: “Dating na may dating”

Some questions for Some questions for tonighttonight

What is the purpose of What is the purpose of Christian dating?Christian dating?

What is the heart behind What is the heart behind dating?dating?

How can dating glorify God?How can dating glorify God? What is the heart behind What is the heart behind

dating guidelines?dating guidelines?

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Fact: Dating and courtship Fact: Dating and courtship are largely cultural in are largely cultural in nature. If we search the nature. If we search the Bible for direction, we find Bible for direction, we find that many of the dating that many of the dating practices are Jewish. practices are Jewish.

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Courtship ala-Jews?Courtship ala-Jews?

Can you imagine implementing some Can you imagine implementing some of the ancient Jewish dating of the ancient Jewish dating practices?practices?

Gen 24 – pre-arranged marriage Gen 24 – pre-arranged marriage (w/o (w/o courtship)courtship)

Page 5: “Dating na may dating”

Jewish dating pratice?Jewish dating pratice?

Ruth 3 – women Ruth 3 – women can can initiate/propose initiate/propose marriagemarriage

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Judges 31 – men just pick-up Judges 31 – men just pick-up (literally) their wives to-be from a (literally) their wives to-be from a bonfire partybonfire party

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Principle over practicePrinciple over practice

Fortunately, while dating is mainly Fortunately, while dating is mainly cultural, the Bible is cross-cultural. cultural, the Bible is cross-cultural. So, when it comes to dating, the So, when it comes to dating, the Bible suggests Bible suggests principlesprinciples, not , not practicespractices..

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Biblical Principles that Biblical Principles that can apply to datingcan apply to dating

Giving God the glory in everythingGiving God the glory in everything

1Co 10:31-33 So whether you eat 1Co 10:31-33 So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble…cause anyone to stumble…

Gal 5:13 You… were called to be Gal 5:13 You… were called to be free. But do not use your freedom free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.serve one another in love.

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Being patient & trusting GodBeing patient & trusting God

Ps 37:4-6 Delight yourself in the LORD Ps 37:4-6 Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your and he will give you the desires of your heart…heart…

Pr 3:5-7 Trust in the LORD with all your Pr 3:5-7 Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And do not lean on your own heart, And do not lean on your own understanding… understanding…

SS 2:7 Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge SS 2:7 Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you… Do not arouse or awaken love until you… Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.it so desires.

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Staying pure, honoring God with your bodyStaying pure, honoring God with your body

1Co 6:18-20 Flee from sexual immorality. 1Co 6:18-20 Flee from sexual immorality. … You are not your own; you were bought … You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.body.Tit 2.11-12 The grace of God…teaches us Tit 2.11-12 The grace of God…teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives…upright, and godly lives…

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MOTIVATIONMOTIVATION

Remember our motivation:Remember our motivation: Main reason = Main reason = encouragementencouragement (Ro 1:12, (Ro 1:12,

15:5; 1 Th 5:11; Heb 10:25). In time, 15:5; 1 Th 5:11; Heb 10:25). In time, going on dates may lead to looking for a going on dates may lead to looking for a partner for life.partner for life.

Done with a spiritual mindset (See 2 Cor Done with a spiritual mindset (See 2 Cor 5:16)5:16)

Dating is only one of many ways to Dating is only one of many ways to encourage someone of the opposite sex encourage someone of the opposite sex (See Heb 3:13)(See Heb 3:13)

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CAUTIONCAUTION

Rom 12.1-2a NLT And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will accept. When you think of what he has done for you, is this too much to ask? Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do..

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How dating endsHow dating ends

Successful steady dating ends up in Successful steady dating ends up in two ways:two ways:

1.1. MARRIAGEMARRIAGE

2.2. BREAK-UPBREAK-UP

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How dating endsHow dating ends

1.1. MARRIAGEMARRIAGE

2.2. BREAK-UPBREAK-UP

BothBoth are successful because you don’t are successful because you don’t end up marrying someone not for you, end up marrying someone not for you, or marrying when you’re not ready!or marrying when you’re not ready!

Anyway, you are brother and sister Anyway, you are brother and sister beforebefore you are boyfriend and you are boyfriend and girlfriend.girlfriend.

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The Heart of GuidelinesThe Heart of Guidelines

Guidelines are natural, normal, and neededGuidelines are natural, normal, and needed FamiliesFamilies OrganizationsOrganizations InstitutionsInstitutions BusinessesBusinesses

OT, God imposed certain practices on Israel to train OT, God imposed certain practices on Israel to train themthem

NT, advice was given by leaders concerning various NT, advice was given by leaders concerning various issues. These directions were not meant to be issues. These directions were not meant to be legalistic rules but reasonable guidelines to protect legalistic rules but reasonable guidelines to protect the church and to help others. These examples the church and to help others. These examples guided the heart and prevented stumbling. (e.g. Acts guided the heart and prevented stumbling. (e.g. Acts 15:6, 22-29; 1 Cor 7:12-14; 1 Cor 16:1-2)15:6, 22-29; 1 Cor 7:12-14; 1 Cor 16:1-2)

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Guidelines…Guidelines… Meant to protect our souls Meant to protect our souls

from crossing the from crossing the boundaries of sinboundaries of sin

Ensure that disciples Ensure that disciples are are differentdifferent from the world, from the world, since we are called by God since we are called by God to have different patterns to have different patterns than the world. than the world.

Working tools, which did Working tools, which did much good for the purity of much good for the purity of our members. Some basic our members. Some basic guidelines that we believe guidelines that we believe we still need:we still need:

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Basic guidelines (from FOF Basic guidelines (from FOF booklet)booklet)

For singles to date only Christians in For singles to date only Christians in the pursuit of holiness (2 Cor 6:14-the pursuit of holiness (2 Cor 6:14-7:1; 1 Co 7:39, see articles on at the 7:1; 1 Co 7:39, see articles on at the church website).church website).

To have at least a double dateTo have at least a double date For those going on dates to be home For those going on dates to be home

by 12 midnight (This is for purity as by 12 midnight (This is for purity as well as personal safety.)well as personal safety.)

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Practicals: Beginning Practicals: Beginning datingdating

Pray and work on your guidelinesPray and work on your guidelines Create a circle of couples, including Create a circle of couples, including

married couples which will help you married couples which will help you growgrow

Evaluate your guidelines after some Evaluate your guidelines after some timetime

Enjoy your romantic friendship!Enjoy your romantic friendship!

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Practicals: Distance Practicals: Distance datingdating

Count the cost before you proceedCount the cost before you proceed Decide on how you will be connected Decide on how you will be connected

with your partnerwith your partner Get close to those around your Get close to those around your

partnerpartner Grow in a number of friendshipsGrow in a number of friendships

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Practicals: International Practicals: International datingdating

Count the cost before you proceedCount the cost before you proceed Keep your relationship from being Keep your relationship from being

isolated isolated Have a main couple to help you with Have a main couple to help you with

bridging the gaps; be completely open bridging the gaps; be completely open with this couplewith this couple

Be humble to accept that there is Be humble to accept that there is much to learn, especially in cultural much to learn, especially in cultural adjustmentsadjustments

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Closing ChallengesClosing Challenges

Be extra spiritual and gratefulBe extra spiritual and grateful Strive to grow personally, and in the Strive to grow personally, and in the

area of encouragementarea of encouragement Spiritual booksSpiritual books www.douglasjacoby.comwww.douglasjacoby.com www.addtoyourlearning.comwww.addtoyourlearning.com

Bring out the best in your partner!Bring out the best in your partner! Seek to glorify God in everything you Seek to glorify God in everything you

dodo

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ConclusionConclusion God loves it when we delight in His God loves it when we delight in His

blessingsblessings Enjoy your Christian lifeEnjoy your Christian life