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I’m Andy

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•Good afternoon – For those of you who don’t know me my name is Andy. •I am the best man.

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Can you hear me?

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•Unlike everyone else who is either an engineer or a solicitor, I’m a teacher and I also happen to be deaf – I’ll start this in the same way I do when I first meet a new class. Louder, Quieter Practice

• I won’t be able to hear if you laugh at my lame jokes – use some visual clues to help things move along.

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LAUGHNOW

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• I’d like to start with a few words of thanks. On behalf of the bridesmaids and myself, I’d like to thank Dan and Debs for asking us to be involved in their special day. I know they’ve both put a huge amount of effort in to the planning this wedding, and I can only hope that, apart from this speech, everything else will be perfect for them.

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It’s not Rocket Science 9

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• I must agree with Dan what a great job the Bridesmaids did – you all look fabulous.

• I would also like to thank the Ushers for top quality ushing – Being an usher is a hard job, not to be underestimated. Telling people roughly where to sit in a church or venue is a real challenge.

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•Nobody ever seems to pay the Groom a compliment – I think you’ll all agree Dan is looking very dapper –although I think the lilac suit would have perhaps been more striking.

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•What can I tell you about Dan?

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•Dan is well-travelled

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•Dan is adventurous•Dan is a thrill seeker

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•Dan is caring and kind•Dan is attractive

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•Dan is… sorry Dan, I can’t read your handwriting here.

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•When Dan told me he was marrying Debs and asked me to be here today, naturally I said I’d be delighted. I’m honoured to be asked and involved on this special day.

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• I’ve met lots of Dan’s friends over the years, many of them are here today.

• I got to know most of you on Dan’s stag do, in Wales. I’d also like to thank them for carrying me up and down a mountain - well I say a MOUNTAIN, it was more a hill really. So I know how lucky he is to have such a great bunch of friends.

•However,… I CLEARLY am the… 23

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BEST MAN

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•I soon realised I would be giving a speech so I sat down and wrote a list of all Dan’s greatest achievements…

•(Produces small list)25

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•Dan grew up just down the road from me right over on the other side of the country – near France.

•As you know, Dan loves to travel and has been all over the world.

•One of his earliest travels was a family holiday to Spain when he was about three

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• After a day spent happily playing on the beach. Dave and Sheila started to pack up and realised they couldn’t find Dan’s shoes anywhere.

• Sheila asks, ‘Dan where are your shoes?’

• ‘In the SAANNDD’

• It took a lot of detective work and a number of flights to Spain but…we’ve found your shoes.

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• Dan loves climbing, a bug he picked up at a very early age. Dan’s parents’ house is in a road called Conifer Drive – and that’s just what it is – a drive through some very tall conifers. Much to his mum’s dismay, Dan used to love climbing in the masses of giant conifers in the garden.

• He would call out ‘muum’, ‘muum’, but she’d have no idea which tree he was in.

• ‘I’ve got no idea where you are but come down right now.’

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• I get the impression that Dave was a bit of a hippie to be honest.

• He’s got a number of 60’s looking ‘ladies’ around the house and a really great record collection. I think this all rubbed off on Dan who became a long-haired guitarist in his teens. Dan and his mates started playing in Trashcan.

• They used to practice in our lounge or bedroom on a Sunday, with strict instructions to keep the windows closed so as not to annoy the neighbours!

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• It was around this time that I first got to know Dan. I’ll always remember the first time I went to his house.

•They’ve got this great sunken lounge, a big open fire – and huge patio doors – it’s like something out of a James Bond film.

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•Dan’s dad was sitting in a leather swivel chair stroking a cat.

• ‘Hi Andy, we’ve been expecting you’

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Not Dave Rose

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•I went round there the other day to pick up some photos…he’s still there.

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•Dan went off to Bath University to become an engineer before finally settling in Bristol. I still saw Dan but mainly during the holidays or at Christmas, so I’m going to ask Dom and James to tell us something about Dan’s West Country years.

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Dom

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James L

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•Dan left university and went to work for Renishaw. I’m not an engineer, unlike pretty much everyone else here, so excuse me if I explain this in layman’s terms. When he wasn’t sleeping in a toilet cubicle he helped make some kind of pokey thing with pink bits at the end. 45

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• My research has shown Renishaw are perhaps the world’s leading manufacturer of pink-tipped pokey things.

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•After a number of years, Dan moved on to another company, whose name I can’t pronounce. Here Dan makes drills

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•Big Drills•Dan and Debs first met at a rugby match.

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•I don’t know who won that day but I think you’ll all agree that Dan scored as well.

•They hit it straight off and discovered they had so much in common.

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•The Great Outdoors

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•Exotic Travel

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•I think Dan and Debs are good for each other because you complement each other so well

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•Dan, you have found someone who is beautiful, intelligent, funny, loving and caring

•Debs you have found someone who is…

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•…Well, DAN really

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www.the-best-man.co.uk

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• Jokes aside, Debs you have brought a joy and light into my friend’s life. I’m so happy that you have found each other and I know that you will have a long and great future together.

•So can I ask that you all join me in raising your glasses to…THE BRIDE AND GROOM

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