communication that matters
TRANSCRIPT
Communication That Matters
Presented by :
David P Fitch, Attorney
Elder Law Services, PLLC
elderlawminnesota.com
caringformyparents.org
George & Martha
Meet
& THE CHILDREN
Eldest SonSon 2 Son 3Oldest
daughterYoungest daughter
Communicate!
WHY?
Control and InvolvementHere is an inevitable fact –
Decisions will be made that affect George & Martha!
The Question is -
Will George & Martha be involved in the decision process?
Expressing Wishes and Desires
For George, Martha & Family
Physical, Mental & Spiritual Health
Financial Matters
“Bucket List”
All of these are Quality of Life Issues Unique to George & Martha
Discuss options George reminds himself that -
Life ALWAYS has Choices and Options
Some are obvious and some are not.
A discussion of Wishes & Desires uncovers OPTIONS that describe ways to achieve wishes and desires
Which leads to ….
Setting a CourseGeorge decides his “WHY”
Which is intertwined with his Wishes & Desires
George has chosen a plan, a road map, a set of steps to follow …
He has made his choice, chosen his options
And by doing this he has created PURPOSE in his life and a HOPE for the future.
George has set his course!
Defuse WorriesGeorge realizes that SETTING a course helps to reduce the …
UNKNOWN.
Which reduces WORRY…
Which breaks the cycle of:
WORRY that leads to …
DISCOURAGEMENT that leads to …
DEFEAT that leads to …
HOPELESSNESS
WHO?
THE POSSIBILITIES OF “WHO” -
Children
Siblings
Friends
Professionals: Pastors, Attorneys, CPA’s, etc
Spouse of a Child
Trusted
George makes his decision based on his own judgment of who he can trust.
George knows that trust is the Greatest attribute of anyone that he confides in with his and Martha’s personal information!
WHAT?
Medical History
George’s & Martha’s Medical History
Critical Information for Family and Health Care Agents*
Much easier for George to create than a third party
* Health Care Agents are established by George & Martha signing properly drafted Health Care Directives.
Personal InventoryFinancial/Personal Account Info
Legal Documents Information
Funeral Pre-Arrangements
Inventory not an accounting
List what you have and where it isBank accounts, insurance, stocks, bonds, IRA’s, etc
List of online accounts and passwords
Where are they?
Wills, Trusts, POA’s, HCD’s, Deeds, Marriage certificates, Divorce decrees, Birth Certificates, Passports, Armed Forces Discharge papers, etc.
Where you keep your pre-arrangement information
Family History/LegaciesFamily Stories
Family Trees
Legacies
Favorite
Biggest Lesson
Funniest
Family Secrets
How far back can you go? Great Grandparents?
3 most important things that you want to tell your family
Your greatest hope for each member of your family
HOW?
Face to Face
With a trusted –
Family Member,
Friend, or
3rd Party
or to a Group
Put it in Writing -Help those that you want to carry out your wishes remember what your wishes are!
Video or Audio
Great way to share stories, pictures, personal encouragements, messages to be played at a funeral.
Be Creative!
ACTION STEPS
Just Do This Now!
Starting is half the Challenge!
This presentation and the “worksheets” for the “What to Communicate” section are
available for download at www.caringformyparents.org/
Credits