assignment one workshop peer feedback 1st draft

7/27/2019 Assignment One Workshop Peer Feedback 1st Draft

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Reid Moldenhauer

ENGL 1102-003Observation Notes

Thursday, September 5, 2013

7:00 pm 8:00 pm

Weight Room

Note: These observations take place over three different observations within a week. The actors

are real and do belong to the discourse community that they belong in, but their names are not

correct. Even if a single person has been observed multiple times in different observations,

doesnt mean that this person truly belongs in a particular community. These actors and

communities are what was observed during these observations only.

Description of Location: The Student Activity Center (SAC) is a large building with multiple

possibilities to exercise and workout. The weight room is located in the basement of thebuilding next to all the locker rooms. The weight room is a large room that is full of exercise

machines from treadmills to dumbbell sets. Right inside the door way is a desk; this is where an

employee of (SAC) checks the student with their student ID card. This allows them to get into

the weight room for free. After the desk, directly to the left are 4 separate sets of dumbbells

and around 8 portable benches. To the right there are three bench set ups, 6 different cable

machines four squat racks, and a leg press machine. Also to the left of the desk there is a water

fountain with a bottle filler. Also located on that side of the room is the water fountain which is

back behind the wall that is separating the desk and the squat racks. Once you get past the

dumbbells and all the different racks and benches, there are 8 different machines that can only

perform a certain workout. These machines are leg curls, leg extension, leg press, bench press,

military press, calve raises, and two abs machines. Right behind this row of machines are 12

tread mills, 6 bikes, and 10 elliptical climbers. behind the row of running machines.

Figured Worlds: A figured world can be seen anywhere a person looks. A figured world is a set

world that runs prematurely on specific rules and applications. A figured world, we can say has

its own laws and ways of behaving, acting, and a specific ways of doing something. But inside a

figured world a person has multiple options on how to act within the figured world.

Rules and Conventions: In the figured world of the weight room in the Student Activity Center,

there are very few strict rules that are meant to be followed. The most important rule states

that no cut-offs are to be worn in the weight room at any time. The student must have sleeves

Comment [RM1]: Put before actors a

before observation one.

Comment [RM2]: Take pictures of th

areas from point of observation.

Comment [RM3]: Good description,

than nesscessary.


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on their shirt in order to get in. The second most important rule is to not leave weights on the

floor of the room, the weights must be re-racked in there designated spot. With the absence ofa lot of rules comes a lot of acceptable ways to act. In the weight room each community shares

a specific code that everyone follows while working out. This code is a sense that most people

follow, and it is that when someone is in the act of doing a work out, you let that person finish

their rep before asking them something. Another code that is sensed in the weight room is that

before using a machine or bench set, make sure that no one else is using it and that you are

able to take over that particular machine. The appropriate ways to act in the weight room are

easy to follow. As long as the person follows these codes and doesnt get into the way of

someone who is intensely going about their workout usually there is no issues at all.

Actors: Actors are what make the figured world what it is. Without actors there would be no

rules and conventions and therefore there wouldnt be a specific figured world. Actors are the

characters that interact in the figured world and therefore interact within discourse

communities found in the figured world under the rules and conventions of that figured world.(Note: All the actors are given a name. These arent there real names.)

Ray: Was only seen in the weight room for one of the observed days. He doesnt feelvery confident in his abilities and he tends to try and stay out of peoples way.

Samantha: Was also only observed once in the weight room, but I guarantee she goesa lot. Samantha doesnt prefer a plain running workout like most of the girls that go to

the gym. She follows a very tough rigorous workout regimen that looked equally as

tough as a lot of the guys regiment.

William: William is seen in two observances. In the first observance hes not veryconfident at all in his ability and really has no prior knowledge of lifting at all. In the

second observance, we see William take the initiative to gain more knowledge about

lifting and better himself despite his lack of confidence.

John: We seen John for a very small part of Observance one. He portrays himself as abig tough guy showing off his arms, when all of the sudden the gym worker put him in

his place and told him to leave and get sleeves on.

Craig and Scott: Craig and Scott are only seen in observance one, but there charactertype is the main kind of people that go to the weight room. They have a set goal in

mind before they go and they execute the goal to their finest.

Cal: Cal is a tall skinny dude that just seemed lost in the weight room setting. Hedoesnt seem to have much prior knowledge about lifting and again isnt confident in

his abilities.

Charles: Is a very confident person when it comes to the weight room. He doesntknow it but he carries himself as a very big bad tough guy, but really he isnt all that he

thinks he is.

Artifacts:

Rays Med Ball: This blue med ball gives Ray the sense of comfort in the gym full ofpeople who know exactly what they are doing.

Comment [RM4]: A brief example of

community.

Comment [RM5]: Add a tread mill.

Tough guys= squat bars, bench presses.


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Literacy Practices: In the weight room there arent very many literacy practices. The main one is that

most people keep to themselves or their group of 2-3 buddies lifting together. Other

than that there really isnt cooperation good or bad that goes on . Just about

Everybodyjust minds their own business and stays focused on what they went there

for.

Discourse Communities

Tough guys: This community is full of people like Charles. These people think they arestronger and bigger than they actually are. They are very cocky and arrogant and not

necessary.

Dedicated and passionate: The majority of people fall under this community. Mostpeople are lifting for a reason and they dedicate themselves and the time each week

to help better themselves. Craig, Scott, and Samantha are prime examples of people inthis community.

No confidence: We see William and Ray in this community because they lack selfconfidence in there ability to lift and they would prefer to stay out of everyones way.

Observation One:

The day was Thursday, September 5, 2013, at 6:00 PM in the Student Activity Center.There were 33 people working out. About 6 females and 27 males in the weight room

at that time.

Ray was in the middle of the hallway standing around with a med ball close by. Heseems to be just observing the other people in the room. He is wearing shorter shorts

and a blue t-shirt. He is not quite sure of himself and doesnt seem very confident in

his knowledge and ability to work out.

While Ray is standing in the middle of the room, mostly everybody else is grouped upwith two or three other people lifting.

Five of the females were in the back of the room running on the tread mills. WhileSamantha, the other female, was lifting by herself in the dumbbell section. She was

jamming out to something on her iPod that made her feel invincible. She was holding

her own with the rest of the boys. Even though she wasnt in a group, she was very

confident in her abilities and knew exactly what she wanted to accomplish.

At 6:25, William checked in at the front desk and started walking to the back of theroom. William was wearing jeans and a t-shirt; right away he stuck out like a sore

thumb in the middle of everyone else.

William went straight to the machines and started doing them very slowly. He waslooking around at all the other groups the whole time. He seemed lost and confusedon what to do.

At 6:28, Ray went and put the med ball back, and got a quick drink of water and thenleft.

Comment [RM6]: Explain a person th

alone doesnt demonstrate literacy pract

people in groups tend to verbally encour

help others in the group.

Comment [RM7]: Explain a purpose

with the groups.

Comment [RM8]: This is the most po

group present.

Comment [RM9]: Explain what Ray w

with the med ball.

Comment [RM10]: Elaborate on why

out.


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At 6:30, the first rule violation occurred. A very muscular guy, with the name of John,walked to the front desk to check in. As the worker looked up at him he noticed Johnsshirt didnt have sleeves. Immediately the worker told John to leave and go get a t-

shirt on.

At 6:35, a group of two guys were lifting on the squat racks. Their names were Scottand Craig. Scott was getting ready to go for a 410 lb. one rep squat. While Craig was

standing directly behind him as a spotter.

At 6:36, a loud grunt was heard from the squat racks. Scott quickly set the massiveweight back on the rack and Craig quickly gave him a high-five.

At 6:40, William just got done doing the last thing in the machine row and quickly leftthe weight room.

Craig and Scott got done on the squat rack and moved to the leg press machine wherethey stayed the rest of the time swapping turns doing the work out.

At 6:45, I was done doing my workout and decided to head home. There were 36people in the weight room at that time. All of the females that were on the treadmills

had left and 4 more females replaced them on the treadmills. Samantha was still

jamming out to her iPod and still lifting in the dumbbell section. John never showed

back up during that period of time.

Observation two:

The day was Friday, September 6, 2013. I arrived at 7:00 PM and went to the bench sets for upper body day. There were 31 people in the weight room at this time. There were 10 females on the

treadmills. These females fall under the same community, they were running to stay in

shape considering all of them were fit looking.

That leaves 21 males were spread about in the rest of the area. The dumbbell sectionhad 7 males, none of which were there in my previous observation.

Right away I saw a person that stood out of the crowd of hard core lifters. Cal was about6 foot and probably 150ish pounds. He was just really, really tall and skinny. He would

walk in circles and watch everybody else lift. He reminded me of William.

At 7: 35 PM, the music changed from Hip Hop to an instrumental piece of music. Itwasnt a really motivating song.

The T.Vs thatline align the wall in front of all the tread mills, were showing Sportcenter,CNN News, some sort of cartoon channel, MTV, and ESPN 2.

At 7:55, I was done with my workout. There were 34 people in the room. Cal was stillgoing strong as he migrated from the machines to the dumbbell sets were he was just

occasionally picking up a dumbbell and curling it a few times.

Observation 3

On Thursday, September 12, 2013, I went to the weight room at 6:45 PM. There were 49 people in the room while 9 of them were females. The room was very

crowded and congested. I had to wait 10 minutes for a bench to open up so I could start

my work out.


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It was around 6:54 when I finally got to start lifting. Right before my first rep, I sawWilliam walk into the gym. But this time he was wearing sport shorts and a t-shirt. Helooked a lot more prepared than last Thursday.

Out of the nine females that were there, 7 of them were running on the treadmills andbikes. Two of them were over lifting in the dumbbell section. They were doing more

light weight toning lifts instead of heavy lifts like Samantha was doing the week before.

Charles was walking to the dumbbell stations when I first saw him. He had long brownhair and was wearing a Charlotte Bobcats Shirt with the name of Okafor on the back of

it, he seemed like he was very knowledgeable about what he was doing but he seemed

a lot weaker than what he was acting like.

Soon after I saw Charles walk by I saw William was dead lifting by the squat racks. Hehad someone next to him telling him the correct form and teaching him how to perform

the lift. He still didnt seem very confident in his ability.

Charles was over strutting around the bicep machine and jumping in and doing one armcurls.

It was 7:30 PM when I was done with my workout. Charles was still over by the bicepmachine and William was still with his friend doing some bar curls.

There were 39 people in the room, and 11 of them were female. But this time instead ofrunning 5 of them working out on the machines.

Interview Questions

Nick Derobertis

1. How often do you lift a week and at what times? Why?I usually lift 5-6 times a week at 8:00 PM. I like going that time because it generally is

less crowded than at afternoon times

2. What is your motivation to lift?I have a passion for bodybuilding, its just what I enjoy doing.

3. What are your thoughts of the weight room at the SAC?I hate it! Its too small, hot, and there is just not enough options.

4. Do you lift with or without people? Why or why not?I lift alone because I like going at my own pace.

5. Do you listen to music off an iPod while you lift? Why or why not?


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Yes, I do, I dont like the music they play in the gym. My music also gets me motivated

and ready to lift hard.

assignment one workshop peer feedback 1st draft

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