ascension magazine march 2013

7/29/2019 Ascension Magazine March 2013

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MARCH 2013, VOL. 11 ISSUE 1

See Page 22


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Publisher / Editor

Mike Strong

Sales Manager

Dottie Godberry

Staff Photographer

Jimmy Dunkley

Contributing Writers

Bill Delaune

Marilyn Bowman

Linda Melancon

Calvin Bessonett

Ron Baratini

Bully

Goosie Guice

Orhan McMillan

Kellie Seymour

Tanya Stilley

Roland Doucet

Denise Smith

Karlin ONeal

Jimmy Dunkley

For Advertising

Information Please call:

225-622-1324

E-Mail Comments

to [email protected]

www.ascensionmagazine.net

Note: Features in this

publication labeled

advertorial

are paid for editorials.

All Rights Reserved.

Opinions expressed are not

necessarily those of the

publisher, editor or staff of

18386 Little Prairie Rd.Prairieville, LA 70769

DREAMS COME TRUE ...........4

ASCENSION HOUSEWISE .....10

SWEET EYES W/ TANYA.... ....12

ASK YOUR REALTOR ............. 18

BOUARI COVER STORY....................22

JAMMIN WITH GOOSIE........ 25

BILL DELAUNE........................26

THOUGHTS FROM BULLY ....32

Table of Contents

In a Store Near You Ask for it by Name

DeliciousVeronsGreen OnionSausagehas takenthe parish

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Taste the Best!


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In January of 2012, GuarantyBroadcasting continued itscommitment to the communityby hosting its Third AnnualDreams Come True Radiothon.Guaranty utilized all five of itsstations to hold a two dayradiothon at GuarantyBroadcasting in effort to raisemoney for this wonderful

organization.Dreams Come True is a local

organization designed to grantdreams to local children withlife-threatening illnesses.Dreams Come True grantsupwards of seventy five dreamsper year to children and theirfamilies in Louisiana.

Guaranty BroadcastingsDreams Come True Radiothon

was held January 19th and

20th. As listeners tuned in tothe stations, they heardheart-breaking stories ofchildren with life threateningillnesses and their familiesstruggles. These children haveeither already had their cometrue or were currently waitingfor their dream to be made.Listeners were encouraged to

either call in or visit any ofGuarantys websites to make adonation to help in efforts tomake these childrens dreamscome true.

The radiothon was supportedby many distinguished members

of the communityincluding MayorPresident KipHolden, LSU

Baseball CoachPaul Maineiri,Baton RougeSheriff SidGautreaux, BatonRouges HilarMoore, WAFBand many more!These guests cameand donated theirtime on the radioand answered thephones at

Guarantys PhoneBank! Withouttheir support, the

radiothon wouldnt have beenso successful.

Through this radiothon,Guaranty Broadcasting helpedDreams Come True raise over$20,000 to help grant dreamsto these local children with

life-threatening illnesses! Notonly did Dreams Come Truereceive a substantial sum, theyalso received countless contacts

wanting to donate time,resources, and services to helpgrant dreams to these children.

Guaranty Broadcasting looksforward to hosting thisradiothon for years to come.Guaranty Broadcasting is sohappy to be a part of such anamazing organization, grantingdreams to children with lifethreatening illnesses in the area.Its events like this that keep

Guaranty live and local andalways willing to servethe community.

Community Service Award Single Effort

Dreams Come True Radiothon

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The American Cancer Societyis the nationwide, communitybased, voluntary health organi-zation dedicated to eliminatingcancer as a major healthproblem by preventing cancer,saving lives, and diminishingsuffering from cancer, throughresearch, education, advocacy,and service.

In Ascension Parish in 2012,the American Cancer Society

provided 902 services to 273families at no charge to them. Ifyou are a cancer patient that isreceiving treatment in NewOrleans and you do not live

within a 40 miles radius of NewOrleans you can stay at HopeLodge. This is free of chargeand is 100% funded by the

American Cancer Society. Therehave been 48 families from

Ascension Parish that have

benefited from Hope Lodgetotaling 573 night. There is nolimit on how long you are ableto stay as long as you are intreatment you are allowed tostay at Hope Lodge.

Since 1991, there has been adecrease in the mortality ratedue to clinical trials, treatment,awareness, and research.

The Ascension Parish Relayfor Life event will be held April

20,2013, from 3:00 p.m. till3:00 a.m. April 21, 2013, atLamar Dixon Expo Center. Ourgoal is to have 30 teams signedup and to raise $125,000.00. If

you have never experienced arelay or not heard of this event

we invite you to come out andsee what it's all about, and if

you have been before we inviteyou back. People that havebeen touched by cancer of

every kind come together incelebration to raise awarenessand raise money that will go tothe American Cancer Society in

hopes that one day we may livein a world with no Cancer and

we can celebrate morebirthdays. Each team sets upand decorates their campsiteaccording to the theme. This

year's theme is " Crusin For ACause". During the event atleast one member from eachteam must have someone walk-ing. The way teams raise moneyat relay are raffles , and lots ofgood food . There will also be acar show, 5k run/walk, balloonlaunch, and luminaria ceremo-ny. Many teams have alreadybeen fundraising with activities

such as a golf tournament,Jambalaya sale, raffles, sellingcookbooks, Painting with a

Purpose, a beauty pageant, andscrapbooking. Congratulationsto Lexie Breaux, and TristynLaborde our 2013 Queens.

There are many activitiesplanned for Relay starting off

with the EA Jazz Bandperforming at 5:00 p.m.followed by the openingceremony at 6:00. Donna Brittfrom Channel 9 and ParishPresident Tommy Martinez willbe the guest speakers. There

will be the survivors lap andcaregivers lap . If you or anyone

you know is a cancer survivoryou may sign up to take part inthe laps by going to relayfor-life.org/ascension. It is free and

you will receive a survivorst-shirt. Center Stage

Performing Arts Academy willbe there as well as TheGonzales Black Belt Academy

The American Cancer Society

The Ascension Parish Relay for Life event will be held April 20, 2013


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and EBBA and the Gatoretteswill perform. The Luminariaceremony is sponsored by Ms.Sharon Saia and the DutchtownHigh School Allied Health.They do such a great job inallowing us to honor those whohave beaten cancer and toremember those who have losttheir battle . We will have a DJ,live music, line dancing andzumba, a night full of fun andexcitement.

Kriste Haydel from Amanda'sGang relays for her daughter

Amanda Haydel Sininan wholost her life to Gliobastoma"Brain Cancer" at the age of 28.Family and friends of BrandiChaney became involved inRelay for Life shortly after herdiagnosis of Ovarian Cancer atthe age of 29. Although she losther battle in March of 2012they continue on in her honor.

Awareness, earlydetection , and proper diagnosisis a huge part of improving thesurvival rate of this disease.Together we can make adifference. Noelle Waguespack-Franz relays in memory of herhusband, Joel "TJ" Franz ll.Relay for life hit home when herhusband was diagnosed withcancer. This is her second year

having a team in memory ofhim and it is a way ofhealing. Many times we hearpeople don't come out orparticipate because they don'tknow what Relay is all about.Relay is not just for peopleaffected by cancer it's foreveryone to come out andsupport the cause. There are toomany people affected by thisdisease , but if we all cometogether and raise money andawareness , then one day thesurvival rate will increase.Noelle relays in memory of herhusband and all those who werelost to cancer, who are stillfighting , and to those who aresurvivors. Let's change the

world and find a cure .There are so many stories of

cancer survivors and those lostto the disease. Please come outand celebrate, remember andfight back.

If you would like to join ateam, start a team or evendonate to a team you may do soby visitingrelayforlife.org/ascension orcontact Lindsay turner,

Ascension's ACS CommunityRepresentative. at225- 287-5177.

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My year as the 2012 GonzalesJambalaya Queen is slowly windingdown - and though I am sad itscoming to an end - looking back, Irealize I have had an absolutelyamazing reign. I have traveled over3,695 miles across the state ofLouisiana and to Washington, DCrepresenting the Jambalaya Festivaland City of Gonzales. I havepicked Oranges in the Orange

groves of Plaquemines Parish,learned how to sew a bag ofharvested rice in Crowley, andpicked fresh Strawberries on thefarm of the PonchatoulaStrawberry King - just to namea few. During my travels I have

made many memories and friendsthat will last a lifetime and for that,I am forever grateful.

It has been a blessing to spendmy reign with my champ andjambalaya King, Danny. We have

had so much fun this year servingJambalaya in our community atthe Senior Citizens sock hop, theGonzales Veteren's Day

Celebration, and multiplefundraisers for St. Jude Children'sHospital. He and his helper, Kurt,are always such good sports aboutthe numerous pictures my wonder-ful "queen mother" insists ontaking and they always keep melaughing! I am truly a lucky girl tohave had this year as queen and tohave forever gained a secondfamily in the Jambalaya FestivalAssociation.

With the 2013 pageant steadilyapproaching I am excited to meetall of the lucky ladies vying for thechance to be Miss Gonzales

Jambalaya and to have the bestyear of her life representing thisamazing organization. Thepageant will be May 4th at theGonzales Civic Center. Anyoneinterested in competing please visitwww.jambalayafestival.org formore information and forms!

Thank you to everyone for all ofthe love and support this year,

Miss Gonzales Jambalaya 2012

Meredith Claire Conger

Jambalaya Queen, Meredith Conger, Takes a Look Back

8


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Fixing The Bedtime BluesBy Dr. Dawn Zitman

Many parents struggle with thebedtime blues, oen doing any-thing possible to coax a child tostay in his or her room. Whetherit is one last story, the remainderof their favorite television show oranother sip of water, children ndways to keep themselves from fall-ing asleep. Parents, oen exhaust-ed themselves from the nightly rit-ual, sometimes feel forced to givein and suggest a peace oering to

entice the child to go to sleep.While no child is exactly thesame, all children generallyrespond well to nightly routines.is is particularly important from1 to 3 years of age, when the childis learning to put his or herselfasleep with little parent interac-tion. Consistent, planned bedtimeroutines help minimize strain onboth parent and child.

Here are a few things when plan-ning a routine:

Give night time baths to help

calm and relax a child before bed. Turn o the television 30-45

minutes before bed. Televisioncauses the brain to become stimu-lated, making it di cult for a childto fall or stay sleep.

Oer a story before bed, andread aloud in a so calming tone.

Have a dened bedtime andstick to it. ough you may need todeviate from this time every nowand then, this is an important stepin creating a routine.

Minimize liquids 30-45 before

bed, and encourage the child to usethe bathroom before getting in bed.

Learn to walk away. Reassurethe child that everything is alright,but be rm and let him or herknow that it is time to go to sleep.

Oer a nightlight if the childseems uneasy in the dark, but re-member that too much light cancause stimulation. Consider usinga so glow night light.

When beginning your rou-

tine, it is normal for your childto wake during the night. If yourchild is not calmed easily andseems scared, he or she may besuering from night terrors. It isimportant to discuss any problemsin your childs sleep patterns withhis or her Pediatrician. e Pe-diatrician can help determine whattreatments are available.

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Many mistakes in furnitureplacement are made becauseits difficult for many people to

visualize the three-dimensionaleffect of furniture in advance.

A floor plan is a necessaryingredient of furnitureplacement pre-planning,

BUT you must also take intoconsideration the dimensionalqualities of furniture as well!This is where a professionaldecorators expertise will save

you time and money!

DONT block a view from apicture window especially ifits a good one! So placing tall

chairs and a lamp on a tableplaced smack in the center of apicture window is a big no-no.Choice and placement offurniture should complement,not conflict with architecturalfeatures.

DO plan a furniture groupingthat wont conflict with your

window. A sofa might fitbelow it, flanked by two end

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Do's & Donts ofFurnniture Placement

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DONT place only woodenpieces of furniture along one

wall or at one end of aroom. Too many woodenpieces in one cluster ten tohave a cold, inhospitablelook.

DO mix wooden pieces withupholstered furniture fortexture contrast and interest.

Rich, polished wood toneslook more so when contrast-ed by handsome fabric, and

vice versa.

DONT use too manymatched pairs of tables,lamps or chairs in one room.Matching pieces help unify aroom, but too many pairs

will make your roomresemble a furniture store.

DO achieve variety bychoosing some similar but

not exactly matching piecesto balance each othertwonon-matching lamps ofsimilar size and shape, forinstance, would be theperfect solution.

DO place large furniture piecesfirst. Its definitely a mistake tostart with your smaller pieces.I guarantee your frustrationlevel will definitely increase if

you try to start the process withsmall tables and accent pieces.

DONT place a largeentertainment center on a small

wall opposite a high wall ina room with a vaultedceiling. Balance andsymmetry will immediatelyfly out the window!

DO try angling your furni-ture. When your furniturepieces chairs, sofas, loveseats are all lined up flatagainst a wall, you lose the

opportunity to createinteresting conversationalgroupings.

When selecting furnitureto be placed in smallerrooms follow thesesimple rules:

1. Pieces with roundedcorners will work best

2. Dont select large oroversized pieces

3. Open shelving styleswill help your space seemmore expansive

4. Opt for a more tailoredlook in upholstered furniturepieces

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SpanksAnyone?Um..No!

Every year around this time

I get a little anxious. Spring is

near and all the comfort food

from the holidays, and the king

cakes during Mardi Gras has

caught up with my waistline.

When Spanks dont get youinto your tried and true jeans,

then its time to get refocused

on proper nutrition and

real exercise!

I know Ive really got to kick

my sugar cravings. You ever

noticed how when you eat

something high in carbohy-

drates, or sugar, your body

tends to just want more? Well,

the cravings have been in full

effect in my body for the pastseveral months. I want this

monkey off my back!

So, I decided to try IdealProtein. A friend of mine thats

a Nurse Practitioner that

opened an Ideal Protein clinic,

so I thought Id visit her, find

out more about the program

and give it a try.

During my visit with Liz

Melancon, NP at Ideal Weight

Loss in Gonzales, I learned that

the Ideal Protein program was

developed in Canada by Dr.

Tran Tien. Dr. Tien realizedthat most weight issues were

due to an insulin imbalance

from too many processed foods.

When your pancreas produces

an overabundance of insulin it

tells your body to store

energyAKA fat. Not good!

So, in order to burn my

bodys fat reserves, Ive got to

keep my insulin low and stay

away from high sugar and

processed foods. This is not anew concept, but what I really

liked about this program is that

they offer low carb, highprotein, easy to fix foods and

snacks. Ive been through low

carb diets before, but I like a

little variety. I get tired of just

eating tuna, chicken, egg whites

and protein powder.

So after hearing about the

ABCs of Ideal Protein, my

measurements were taken and

my weight was recorded (oy

vay)! Then I went into a large

room to choose my weeksreserves of completely

compliant foods and snacks.

I shouldnt have started on a

Friday, because I had a few slip

ups during the first weekend of

my program. I really like the

taste and the flavor of the IP

foods I chose. I especially liked

the soups. The protein in these

products really helps you to feel

full; however, you may still

experience some cravings. Itsnot necessarily because youre

hungry, but because your body

is craving those foods that are

high in carbs. I noticed I did

have a little headache the first

few days, but nothing some

Advil didnt help.

Its day four of the program

and Ive lost three pounds. I

am staying completely

hydrated, so I know its pounds

and not just water weight. Bestof all, I feel lighter and better

about myself. I have a goal of

eight to ten more pounds, and

Im determined to get there.

Many Thanks to Liz at Ideal

Weight Loss in Gonzales for

her motivation and continued

support through this process.

ItsHypnotic!

I actually intended to talk

about something else in my

beauty bit for Sweet Eyes, but

Ive had a change of plans. I

have a new favorite mascara.

Its called Hypnose Star and its

made by Lancome.

The unique brush is so easy

to use. One side of the wand isa bit stubbier and is useful for

applying more mascara at the

base of the lash, while the flip

side of the wand creates long

and lush lashes. I am

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received a sample and already

purchased a full size. The mas-

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Noir Midnight, and runs about

$28.00. For more information

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ImSpringingForward

We spring forward thisweekend. I always feel so

conflicted every Saturday nightor Sunday morning I goaround the house to change allthe clocks. It always seems likea good idea, but really, itstough for me! When we springforward, it stays darker later in

the mornings and its muchtougher to get out of bed.But enough complaining;Im going to focus on theproductive things I will do withan extra hour of daylight inthe evenings. I will enjoybarbequing and eating dinneroutside while the sun sets,taking a swim, catching a

baseball game, working in mygarden, taking a walk AFTERdinner, and spending moretime with family and friends

with an extra hour of daylightin the evenings. Id say thatcertainly beats a littlegrogginess in the mornings.

What will you do with anextra hour of daylight?

Send any questions orcomments to [email protected]

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14/4414

Cajun galdoesSundance

by Jennifer Rhea Cross

The Sundance Film Festival is anAmerican film festival that takes placeannually in January at Park City,Utah. It is one of the largest inde-pendent film festivals in the UnitedStates. It is a showcase for new docu-

mentary and dramatic films, fromAmerican and international independ-ent filmmakers..Earlier this year, I discovered that myparents would be going to Utah forbusiness during the same time thatthe Sundance Film Festival was beingheld. I knew that this would be achance of a lifetime, since I'm a filmenthusiast and writer. So the processof getting my press credentials, or, asI like to call it, "the golden ticket"began. The best way to describe it isthat it's sort of like getting stadiumseats for an LSU game rather thanthose nosebleed seats. The press cre-

dentials gave me admittance to the-atres and public venues on a space-

available basis. It permitted me toenter theatres to photograph filmintroductions and Q&A sessions withthe actors and filmmakers, as well asaccess to press conferences, mediaareas, and press events.Once I got my press credentials,

Operation Cajun Sundance began. Ihad to prepare for the "freezing"snow and therefore bought the properboots, pants, sweaters, and obnoxioussnow hats (I didn't wear any ofthem). As a matter of fact, it was hot.Not LSU-game hot, but more likeMardi Gras hot. Four suitcases for myparents and I, and we never wore halfthe clothes, hats, gloves, cuddle duds,thermal socks, and earmuffs that we

bought. It snowed, but it was a "dry"cold. Even when it got down to theteens, it was never as bone cold as weget here in the 40's. However, thedry cold did amazing things for myhair. You don't need a blow-dryerbecause your hair dries as soon as youwalk out of the shower. The cold doesmake your nose hurt and you take amillion deep breaths because of thealtitude. Combine the two, andyou're a sight to see...or maybe just aCajun.The first person that I met wasHarvey Weinstein, legendary execu-

tive producer of films such as PulpFiction, The Aviator, and The Artist.

He was casually dressed sitting next tous at the restaurant at dinner. He wasinteresting, not at all what I expected.I learned quickly that you have aboutthirty seconds to choose what youwant, get a picture or an autograph.One of the most interesting aspects ofthe festival was the "gifting suites." Ihad the opportunity as a press mem-ber to attend many, and discoveredthe importance of them. As a non-

celebrity (a.k.a Cajun), I just thoughtof gifting suites as places for famous,rich people to get free products thatmost people could never afford oreven think about owning. Let meexplain what a "gifting suite" is reallyall about. The premise of a "giftingsuite" is for a brand to get the oppor-tunity to have a celebrity be pho-tographed wearing their product, anapplied endorsement, if you will.While some were only for the "impor-tant people," I was honored to attenda couple as a press member. I'm stilltrying to find out how to get a freepair of Ugg boots to replace myCajun Reeboks; a Cajun gal can only

dream.L'Oreal Sundance Gifting Suite wasfabulous because my mother and Igot to get our hair and makeup done,

and we left with some goodies. Wewalked down Main Street like celebri-

ties until we got on the shuttle. Sidenote: Salt Lake City has incredibleand clean shuttles.Deb Durkins "Eco-Hideaway" atThe Chateaux in Deer Valley was anhonor to attend because everythingthat was given, decorated, or present-ed was eco friendly. Durkin chooses anon-profit organization to be high-lighted at all her events. At Sundance,it was Save the One Campaign with

Guard a Heart Foundation. I got thechance to speak with one of the brandowners Deb Miller President/CEOHugrz Boot Wraps and asked herhow gifting suites have benefited herproduct. She said, "The company isonly 19 months old and I can't affordthe advertising in high- profile maga-zines. Festivals give me the opportuni-ty to not only get my product outthere, but it allows me to interact ona personal level with many differentpeople."The Outdoor Retailers Innovation

Gallery at Sundance gives the publica glimpse into brands that capture thespirit of the outdoors, as well as its

role in independent film. Althoughthis Cajun gal doesn't get to usemuch winter gear, I found the"Outdoor Retailer" to be the Fashion


15/44

Week of Sundance! The OutdoorRetailer assisted with promoting theLouisiana International Film Festivalin Sundance, which will be held inBaton Rouge on April 18- 21. TheLouisiana Film Festival staged a tradi-tional "Second Line" up Main Streetled by Jonathan Batiste, as well aspeople with Mardi Gras Beads,umbrellas and some funky moves!Throughout my trip the most memo-rable celebrity sightings were:Amy Poehler from Saturday NightLive, who was not only adorable, but

surprisingly petite. I introduced her tomy parents (they're not up to date oncelebrities) as "mom and dad, this isAmy Poehler!" She shook their handsand then kept re-introducing herselfto them, on purpose. I was so excitedto get a picture with her that I over-looked her Parks & Recreation co-starAdam Scott. Sorry Adam, you're fabu-lous and thanks for photo bombingmy picture with my new BFF (BestFriends Forever).Catherine O'Hara was a delightful andbeautiful surprise to meet. It tookeverything in me to not ask her to yell"Kevin!" (Home Alone) or sing "Day-o" (Beetlejuice).

Must see Sundance Festival Films:A.C.O.D. is a hilarious comedy filmdirected by Stu Zicherman and star-ring Adam Scott, Amy Poehler, JessicaAlba, Catherine O'Hara, and JaneLynch. The name of the film is anabbreviation for Adult Children ofDivorce. I had the pleasure to meetfirst-time director Zicherman and seehis film; it's definitely a must see, andI promise that you'll cry from laugh-

ing with the stellar cast.Sound City is a documentary aboutthe famed recording studio in VanNuys, California, which was the originof records by Fleetwood Mac,Nirvana, Rick Springfield and TomPetty among many others. Rock musi-cian Dave Grohl, of Nirvana and FooFighters, sets out to tell the story of arecording studio in his first film. Thestudio became famous for a singlepiece of recording equipment a

1970s era sound board that

became a "hope diamond" formusians. Sound City is a musical timemachine that allows film and musicenthusiasts to travel back throughtime to when music was recorded withraw, pure imperfections that led tomany remarkable careers. It made mewant to throw out my iPad and com-puter, and start typing on a typewriter while rocking out to the SoundCity soundtrack.

Blood Brother is a documentary fea-ture film directed by Steve Hoover. Itcaptured the grand jury prize and theaudience award for U.S. documen-taries at the Sundance. Hoover tracesthe journey of his best friend, Rocky,who travels to India and changes hislife forever. Rocky establishes a bondwith children and their families withAIDS, who face life and death situa-tions on a daily basis. This documen-tary made me cry, smile, laugh, and

want to scream all at the same time.

Hoover captures the pure innocenceof AIDS as well as the horror with anend result that will transform views onAIDS. "The funding of this film isquite unique. It was all supportedthrough donations. This means wehave no debt and no one to pay backfor the film, allowing any/all of theproceeds from the film to be used tohelp support the orphanage and thechildren with HIV in India, as well as

supporting Rocky and his continuingefforts," Hoover explained in hishumble interview. Hoover admittedhis ignorance towards AIDS at thebeginning of filming. By falling inlove with the children, his passion andneed to help transcended his ownthoughts on AIDS. When asked ifHoover felt like an activist for AIDS,he admitted Im not sure if I consid-er myself an activist because I don'tknow what an activist feels." It was atthat moment that I knew that I wasinterviewing not only an AIDS

activist, but a film director that willchange the world through his lens.Operation Cajun Sundance was chal-lenging with a few disappointingmoments. I may not have gotten tomeet the most famous celebrities orwatch every film at Sundance. I didn'tget to attend any of the premiers, orcover the red carpet. But the experi-ences that I did have were unforget-table and unimaginable. Besides thefestival, I also took the time to visitthe Utah Olympic Park. It was a com-petition venue for the 2002 OlympicWinter Games for Nordic jumpingand the sliding sports of bobsleigh,luge and skeleton. I highly recom-

mend taking the time to visit to see aglimpse into the Olympics.Sundance took a little piece of myspicy Cajun heart. As I flew over themountains on my way home toLouisiana, I smiled knowing that thisCajun will be back next year!

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225.744-3631 Fax 225.744.3647


17/4417

Estate PlanningMistakes

Many think that estate planningis only for the rich, but thatthinking is wrong. Estateplanning is life planning and itsfor everyone. Whether you oryoung or old, healthy or ill, younever know what life holds and itis best to be prepared. In thisarticle we discuss some of thecome mistakes that people makeor actions they fail to take withregard to their planning.

The death rate from automobileaccidents is more than double forsomeone 20 compared to

someone 60 years old; therefore,planning is not just for olderpeople. An accident can occur atany age that can leave you unableto make financial or health caredecisions for yourself. Therefore,its important to have financial

and health care powers of attor-ney in place to allow the personyou choose to make decisions foryou if you cannot make them foryourselves. Further, you shouldconsider whether you want to bekept alive artificially if doctorshave determined that you arenever going to recover. All of thecases that have reached the U.S.Supreme Court that dealt withend of life decision makinginvolved young people. So, evenif you dont believe you haveenough assets to warrant a will or

a trust, make sure you at leasthave the proper decision makingdocuments in place in the eventyou become incapacitated.

Another common mistake isfailing to coordinate beneficiarydesignations with the remainderof your plan. All too often,peoples lives change and theychange their will or trust but donot coordinate these changes withtheir beneficiary designations. As

a result, the bulk of their assets,such as insurance, retirementplans, and IRAs, end up going inways that are no longer desired.This mistake occurs becauseassets controlled by beneficiarydesignations are not controlledby wills and trusts.

Many people leave assets outrightto their children or otherswithout consideration of other

options. This can often be amistake. Often, leaving assets intrust provides advantages for thebeneficiaries. By leaving theassets in trust, the assets can beprotected from the creditors orex-spouses of the beneficiary, aswell as from the beneficiarysown indiscretions.

Another common error isforgetting to update you estateplanning documents when there isa change in their circumstances.Life is constantly changing. The

birth of a child or grandchild,divorce, re-marriage, substantialincrease or decrease in assets,change in health, and many othercircumstances can have significantimpact on your estate plan.Periodic review of your estateplan can keep it current and instep with changing circumstancesas life goes on.

Of course, the greatest is estateplanning mistake is the failing to

plan at all. None of us like tocontemplate our own mortalityand everyone always thinks thatan accident that causes incapacitywill always happen to the otherguy. Therefore, we put offplanning sometimes until it istoo late. One of the mostcommon comments I receivefrom those who complete theirplanning is what a relief it is toknow that their family and loved

ones will be taken care of ifsomething happens to them.

As you can see, estate planning isnot just for the wealthy. Estateplanning is life planning and it isfor all adults, regardless of age orcondition of health. To find outwhat you need to do to protectyou and your family consult aqualified estate planning attorneycan help you implement a planthat fits your life and your wishes.

Ms. Melancon has engaged in thepractice of law in Louisiana forthe past 14 years. The primary focusof her practice is estate planning,special needs planning, elder lawand probate. She is also accreditedby the VA to give advice regardingveterans benefits. For moreinformation, please contact her at744-0027 or visit her website atwww.LegacyCenterLa.com or herfacebook page at: http://www.face-book.com/pages/Prairieville-LA/Legacy-Center-of-Louisiana/267942070212.

YOUR ESTATE MATTERSBy Linda Melancon


18/44

A S K Y O U R

Realtor

wi th Mar i l yn Bowman

Starting from where I left off

last month, this article will

explain which option is better.

SHORT SALE vs.FORECLOSURE:

Which is the Better Option?

Losing your home toforeclosure due to inability tokeep up with your monthlypayment is one of life's mostunpleasant experiences. It isalso an event that keeps onaffecting you long after yourhome is history by devastating

your credit score. Peoplecannot be 100% sure thatthey will remain safe fromforeclosure because they can'tforesee the unexpected like

serious illness, divorce, job lossand other hardships peopleexperience in life.

Of all available options,

FORECLOSUREIS THE WORST

The inevitable result of a

foreclosure is the lender taking

your house. Not only will you

lose your house, but thelender can get a judgment

against you for the arrearages

you owe plus his costs for the

foreclosure action. If that isn't

enough, your credit report will

be in terminal condition for

many years into the future,

worsening an already bad

financial situation and making

it very difficult to obtain any

other kind of credit.

THERE IS NOUPSIDE TOFORECLOSURE.

It should be avoided atall costs.

Almost any option is betterthan foreclosure

Simply stated, do everythingyou can before foreclosureoccurs and do it as quickly ashumanly possible. Don't sitback and keep thinking,"What can I do?" Insteadconsider that short sale andcall me before your optionsbecome more limited.

The One Best Tip I canGive You:

DON'T DO THISALONE

Facing Foreclosure is a scary

thing. Having someone who

knows who to talk to, when to

talk to them and how to

handle all the paperwork is key

to getting the job done and

saving your credit. You need

my professional help so call me

today(225) 936-8534, don't

wait until it's too late. I am

free of charge to you and will

work to help you avoid

foreclosure. The lender pays

the commission at the

time of a sale.

18


19/44

Grinding Time

In the late 1930s and early

1940s my grandfather, Joseph

Alexander Braud, had a

rendezvous with Cora; Cora

Texas that is. Cora Texas is a

sugar factory located on Hwy. 1

just down the road fromDonaldsonville in White Castle.

It is still a very lucrative and

productive business.

Each year in September,

Grandpa Braud would ride his

horse from Bluff Road in

Ascension Parish to Cora Texas.

There he would stay until

Grinding Time was over,

usually a period then of about

six weeks. There was no going

home during this

time. This was

Grandpas only cash

income for the yearwith the exception

of the little money

coming in from

selling eggs.

Grandpa raised most

of his own food;

cows for milk,

butter, cream, calves

for meat, pigs for

bacon, pork, chick-

ens , vegetables, etc.

Times were hardand you didnt pass

up a chance to make

some cash money.

As a young girl, I

had a chance to visit

the Cora Texas.

Living in Calcasieu Parish, we

didnt get to visit my grandpar-ents very often. One of our

visits was during the sugar cane

grinding season. I was scared

while riding the ferry across the

Mighty Mississippi and couldnt

believe Grandpa did it on a

horse. If you had a horse with

four white stocking feet you

didnt have to pay the nickel

that it cost to ride. For those

reading this that aren't familiar

with this term, four stocking

feet meant that your horses

legs were white from above the

ankles to the hooves. Grandpa

had one of these.

The men who worked during

sugar cane grinding during this

long-ago time, stayed in a tinbuilding somewhat like an old

Army barrack; very plain and

austere. The building thatserves as living quarters today is

known as the boarding house

and is equipped with all the

amenities of a hotel. The

migrant workers today come

from many different countries

and I am quite sure, none rode

a horse there!

I remember enjoying the

guided tour we were given of

the small sugar factory and

being terrified when the manshowing us around told us kids

that if we fell in to the boiling

vats of sugar we would

immediately be cooked until we

too became sugar and never

found again. That remark has

always stayed with me.

My photographer daughter,

Stacie Crawford, and I

thoroughly enjoyed our visit

and reminiscing about days

gone by. Mr. Robert Youngmade us feel very welcome and

shared some interesting facts

and Ms. Barbi Hood gave us

some interesting information.

For more information about

this very lucrative and still

thriving factory go to their

website, CoraTexas.com. It is a

much larger operation now and

very interesting. I think my

Grandpa would be pleased that

I shared this little story aboutGrinding Time

By Connie Braud Brock

19


20/44

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NEW PATIENT GIFT

GUMDISEASEBy Calvin Bessonet, DDS,FAGD

What is Gum Disease?

Gum disease, or periodontaldisease is a chronic inflammationand infection of the gums and

surrounding tissue. It is the majorcause of about 70 percent of adulttooth loss, affecting three out offour persons at some point in theirlife. Periodontal diseases includegingivitis and periodontitis.

What causes gumdisease?

Bacterial plaque a sticky,colorless film that constantly formson the teeth is recognized as theprimary cause of gum disease. Ifplaque isn't removed each day bybrushing and flossing, it hardensinto a rough, porous substance

called calculus (also known astartar).Toxins produced andreleased by bacteria in plaqueirritate the gums. These toxinscause the breakdown of the fibersthat hold the gums tightly to theteeth, creating periodontal pocketsthat fill with even more toxins andbacteria. As the disease progresses,pockets extend deeper, and thebacteria moves down until thebone that holds the tooth in placeis destroyed. The tooth eventuallywill fall out or require extraction.

Are there other factors?

Yes. Genetics is also a factor, as arelifestyle choices. A diet low innutrients can diminish the body'sability to fight infection. Smokersand spit tobacco users have moreirritation to gum tissues thannon-tobacco users, while stress canalso affect the ability to ward offdisease. Diseases that interferewith the body's immune system,such as leukemia and AIDS, may

worsen the condition of the gums.In patients with uncontrolleddiabetes, where the body is moreprone to infection, gum disease ismore severe or harder to control.Pregnant women experienceelevated levels of hormones thatcause the gums to react differentlyto the bacteria found in plaque,and in many cases can cause acondition known as "pregnancygingivitis."

What are the warningsigns of gum disease?

Signs include red, swollen or

tender gums, bleeding whilebrushing or flossing, gums thatpull away from teeth, loose orseparating teeth, pus between thegum and tooth, persistent badbreath, a change in the way teethfit together when the patient bitesand a change in the fit of dentures.While patients are advised to checkfor the warning signs, there mightnot be any discomfort until thedisease has spread to a point wherethe tooth is unsalvageable. That'swhy patients are advised to getfrequent dental exams.

What does periodontaltreatment involve?

In the early stages of gum disease,most treatment involves a specialcleaning called scaling and rootplanning, which removes plaqueand tartar around the tooth andsmoothing the root surfaces.Antibiotics or antimicrobials maybe used to supplement the effectsof scaling and root planing. Inmost cases of early gum disease,

called gingivitis, scaling and rootplaning and proper daily cleaningachieve a satisfactory result. Moreadvanced cases may requiresurgical treatment, which involvescutting the gums sometimeswith the assistance of a laser andremoving the hardened plaquebuild-up and recontouring thedamaged bone. The procedure isalso designed to smooth rootsurfaces and reposition the gumtissue so it will be easier tokeep clean.

How do you preventgum disease?

Removing plaque through dailybrushing, flossing and professionalcleaning is the best way tominimize your risk. Your dentistcan design a personalized programof home oral care to meetyour needs.

What is the role of thegeneral dentist?

The general dentist usually detectsgum disease and treats it in the

early stages. Some general dentistshave acquired additional expertiseto treat more advanced conditionsof the disease. If the general den-tist believes that the gum diseaserequires treatment by a specialist,the patient will be referred to aperiodontist. The dentist and peri-odontist will work together to for-mulate a treatment plan for thepatient.

How can I maintain

treatment at home?Sticking to a regular oral hygieneregimen is crucial for patients whowant to sustain the results ofperiodontal therapy. Patientsshould visit the dentist everythree to four months (or more,depending on the patient) for spotscaling and root planing and anoverall exam. In between visits,they should brush at least twice aday, floss daily and brush theirtongue. Manual soft nylon bristlebrushes are the most dependableand least expensive. Electricbrushes are also a good option,

but don't reach any further intothe pocket than manual brushes.Proxy brushes (small, narrowbrushes) and other interdentalcleaners are the best way to cleanbetween the recesses in the teethand should be used once a day.Wooden toothpicks and rubbertips should only be used if recom-mended by your dentist.

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21/4421


22/44

It was exactly one year ago thatthis crazy, yet exciting new journeyin my life would begin. It all startedwhen a longtime friend asked Patand I to attend the grand openingof a new weight loss clinic in ourarea. As lifelong residents of theparish and owners of severalbusinesses over the last 30 years,

he thought we might be able tohelp the young couple just startingout. I must admit I did not want togo, but agreed after much persist-ence from Pat. When we arrived I

was very impressed with thelay out of the clinic and theprofessional atmosphere. As wetalked to the owners, they told usall about this new and innovativeway to lose weight. I listenedhalf-heartedly, because they weretalking to someone who hadstruggled with her own weightissues and had battled with anegative body image her entire life.

I had tried numerous diets andprograms, joined health clubs, andeven resorted to surgery, all to noavail. So what could possibly beso different about this program?I was about to find out.

After meeting with this youngcouple, I was asked if I would helpthem to spread the word abouttheir business. They were notfrom here and did not have anybusiness connections. I told them Icould not promote a businessunless I knew that it did in fact dowhat they claimed it could do, so Iwas offered a 30 day trial program

to see what I thought of it, which Ihesitantly accepted, but thoughtwhat did I have to lose, exceptweight. I agreed to follow the planto the letter because I wanted tobe able to tell them I had doneeverything exactly as they told meto but it just didnt work thiswould be yet another program toadd to my list of failed attempts.

Or would it? Within the first two

weeks of the program, I had lost14.4 lbs. and over 7 inches. Bythe end of the month I was at the20 lb. mark and over 10 inches.

My trial period was over, but I

agreed to keep going, this wasactually working. I was not hungry,I loved the food, and I loved theresults. I continued the programfor the next 5 months, takingbreaks in between because I alsowanted to test for myself that if Istopped the program, would Igain the weight back? (I do notrecommend this by the way,because it is very hard to get backinto the routine. Its better to toughit out, so once you are on a rollstay on it!!) But even on thebreaks, I was able to maintain myweight. After all was said and

done, I was 40 lbs. lighter and hadlost 23.5 inches all over my body.I could not have been happier andI was ready to spread the word.

In August, I was asked if I wouldconsider working part time at theclinic. I agreed. Within three

The Bouari Program will help you lose an

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Pat & Karen Sigur


23/44

months of working there I wouldbe managing the clinic and thisyear would become the owner.Wow, how your life can change in

just a few short months! If youwould have told me at thebeginning of last year, that by theend of the year I would not onlylose 40+ lbs., but keep it off; Iwould become a weight lossconsultant - and would eventuallyend up owning my own clinic, I

would have told you to lay off thesauce for a little while because itwas beginning to affect your brain.But God, is all I can say. It wasHis plan all along. For I know the

plans I have for you, declares theLord, plans to prosper you andnot to harm you, plans to give youhope and a future. Thank youLord, for renewed hope, a brightfuture and the opportunity toteach others how to weigh lessand live longer.

The Bouari Clinics werefounded by Dr. Carol Ann

Chaney, an RN, with a PhD innutrition, who has 17 yearsof experience in the weightloss indusdtry.

Bouari Clinic of Prairieville is apart of a rapid expanding nationalfranchise. Currently, there are5 locations in Louisiana. Checkus out at www.bclouisiana.com

The Bouari

program consists

of three simple

steps:

All you have to do is:

Use our metabolism-boosting products andfollow our scientificallydesigned meal plan,

made up of fruits,vegetables and

lean meats.

Benefit from weeklysessions with our

nutritional counselors, tomake sure you are fully

accompanied onyour journey to

healthier living.

Let your bodysmetabolism do the hard

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weight, and then rely onthe nutritional aware-

ness you will haveachieved with Bouari to

help stay that way.

P R A I R I E V I L L E

17534 Old Jefferson Hwy, Ste. B2

Prairieville

(Next to Oak Grove Primary School)

225.819.3741

[email protected]

P. O. Box 1626 Prairieville

225.622.6475

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24/44

THEOFFICIALPROGRAMOFTHEJAMBALAYAFESTIVALASSOCIATION

DannyRobert2012JambalayaChampion

2 0 1 3

INTRODUCING THE OFFICIAL PROGRAM OFTHE JAMBALAYA FESTIVAL ASSOCIATION

Finally, there is an Official Program thatrepresents the Greatness of the Festival and

Showcases Our Community with photos,schedules, pageants, events and history.

In addition to distribution at the Festival,the program will be distributed at localgrocery stores and businesses.

Also, advertising revenues raised go toThe Jambalaya Festival Associationwhich, in turn, are used and put backinto our community.

ATTENTION ADVERTISERS:

The Official Program will be the

ONLYpublication distributed at the

Jambalaya Festival.

To purchasead space contact:

Wally Tallion

225.806.6579Mike Strong

225.622.1324

24


25/44

As far as I can remember, whenI first started fishing there was onlyone type of fishing line. We calledit salt and pepper because it hadblack and white colors on it. Atsome point monofilament fishingline was introduced and it becamea mainstay for years to come. Well,not anymore. Types of fishing linetoday has gone far beyond most ofour expectations to say the least.

I recently attended a seminar atthe Louisiana Outdoor Writersconference where a representativefrom Berkley fishing lines gave atalk on the entire realm of the past,present, and future of fishing line.Some of the materials used incertain types of line makeup wereactually invented for use in WWII.Most of the components for

today's different types of lines areproduced from our chemical andpetroleum plants.

Some lines are optimized forspinning reels such as Trilene XL.Some are optimized for baitcasting such as XT. There are linesthat allow for stretch and shockabsorption and there are othersthat do not. Some lines sink, whichis good for fishing baits that needto sink, while other lines float orsink slowly and are designed fortop water lures. Fluorocarbons areresistant to UV light and will

disappear under water. This line issensitive to heat and friction.Things such as clinching a knot toofast or clinching the knot when theline is too dry can cause knotfailure. Gel-spun polyethylenesuper lines, more commonly calledbraided line has made it's mark inthe fishing line industry. Again.Although very tough line, they arenot for everyone or for all types offishing reels or fishing methods.Berkley is now offering its newestcategory offline to the market. It'sa unifiliment fishing line called

NaNo-fil. This line is not a mono,braid,or fluorocarbon.

One may think that if you go out

and buy the most expensive line onthe market you will have all thebases covered. That's not the casehere by far. All these lines aredesigned for certain types of reels,rods baits, and methods of fishing.Things such as lb. test, diameterrange, buoyancy in water, waterabsorption, effect of UV light,stretch, shock absorption,sensitivity, abrasion resistance,spool memory, and colors shouldbe taken into consideration beforepurchasing fishing line. And by theway, there's no one type knotthat's a cure all for for thesedifferent types of line. Most ofthem require different knots forultimate results. Some lines requiredifferent types of eyes on the rodfor abrasion control.

Your line is a direct link fromyou and what's on the end of theline. It could be your fish of alifetime. It could be that one youneed to win a tournament. Maybeit's your kids' or Grandkids'biggest fish, whatever it is, youdon't want to lose it even if youintend to release the fish after youcatch it. (But you want to catch itdon't you?). I DO. I wouldsuggest that you do a littleresearch before buying line thesedays, because one thing is forsure, fishing line ain't just fishing

line anymore.

Till next time,

" Are you confused yet?"

James " Goosie" Guice

Fishing Line Ain'tJust Fishing Line Anymore

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26/44

Nothing should surprise meanymore concerning my annualspring pilgrimage into the bowelsof the Bluff Swamp to find theelusive, reclusive All-Seeing,

All-Knowing Sports Ninja.But this year even the Great

One (his preferred titled) trulyoutdid himself.

He was certainly easier to findthis March as high water in thebasin had forced him to relocateat the old Alligator HiltonBar-but the props around him

were all different.For starters there was a classic

cherry-red Mustang parkedoutside the establishment

instead of his usual 49 manuretruck with the whiskey dents inthe side.

Then, the costume he worelooked like he should be playingin the Golden Band fromTigerland instead of predictingthe outcome of sporting events.

And then there was the musicblaring from within the Hilton

where cowboys, hippies, bikersand LSU frat kids had oncedanced across the warped floorto Uncle Jims one-man showon Sunday nights.

It was unmistakably the Beatlesbemoaning the inevitable fate ofthe ageing process

If Id been out till quarter tothree, would you lock the door?

Will you still need me, willyou still feed me, when Imsixty-four?

Even Ninjas mood was morejovial than his usual stoic mannerbut his greeting hadnt changed.

Hello, Fishwrap. Youdinosaur tree-killers havent beenput out of business by theInternet yet? How do you likethe new digs? Frank and Jim are

letting me stay here a while untilthese bureaucrats figure out howto drain a swamp. The water atmy place is higher than a KeithRichards post-concert partyright now.

I took a second look aroundand measured my reply carefully.

Is that your car?An original 64 Mustang

complete with the 289 cubicinch V-8-best engine Ford evermade, he announced soundinglike a proud papa.

And the outfit-the music?Come one-youre the

detective wannabe. Give someinvestigative reporting, Ninjaencouraged.

Okay, I ventured. Youredressed like you belong on thecover of the Sgt. Pepper albumand-if my fading memoryserves-When Im 64 was thesecond song on Side 2.

Bingo! he exclaimed.That calls for a beer. Howabout a Miller 64? he askedalmost gleefully.

Say, all this wouldnt haveanything to do with the fact thatI turned 64 on March 19, wouldit? I finally surmised.

Its the best surprise party Icould come up with under thecircumstances, he admitted.

From inside the Alligator Barcame the first song from Side 3of the White Album

You say its your birthdayscreamed Lennon andMcCartney.

Well, I must say Imimpressed, I confessed. Howon earth did you remember?

The Great One knows all andsees all, he preached majestically

before dropping the faade justas quickly. Besides, when youcame here four years ago inMarch you were turning 60 and

you had a depressed face so longI thought Men in Black werecoming to pick you up. So I dida little math and figured some64 references might cheer youup for this landmark occasion.

And if these rednecks downhere had passed a law like

Amendment 64 like they did inColorado, we couldve had areal party.

Whats Amendment 64? Iasked innocently.

Legalization of marijuana,

Birdcage Bottom, he scolded.They regulate if just likealcohol.

The Beatles had now launchedinto a satirical song-number sixfrom Side 1 of the White

AlbumHey, Bungalow Bill, what did

you kill?Well, the effort is appreciat-

ed, I managed, butBut the reason youre here is

to find a winner in the NCAAbasketballs field of-dare I sayit-64, he interrupted. Anddont give me that field of 68nonsense with play- in gamesbetween teams that sound likethey should be on Rocky andBullwinkle-Barely Normal, TickTock Tech and Wossamotta U.,Ninja ranted.

The cars a 64, the songs a64, the beers a 64, the Beatlesarrived here in 64, youre 64and the March Madness teamsnumber 64 and thats just the

way it is, he concluded.We have no quarrel, I

assured him. But four yearsago, you pulled me out of my

doldrums-and also out of somedebt-with the advice to move aTom Izzo-coached team a couplerounds farther then one wouldhave them in the brackets.

I penciled longshot MichiganState in all the way to the finalsand although they lost to NorthCarolina, I still made a bundle,I recalled.

The Great Sports Ninja got apensive look on his face andadmitted honestly. Look, Rag

Writer, this years tougher thanbear meat. The tournaments

wide open and its a long andwinding road to

On cue the third song fromSide 2 of Let It Be began

The Fab Four Picks the FinalFour or Weve Got a Ticket to Lie

by Bill Delaune

26


27/44

from insideThe long and winding

roadDammit, I told them to sing

Delaune and winding road inyour honor, but I guess they for-got, sighed Ninja.

For the umpteenth time thatday I was taken aback. What do

you mean by that? I asked.Look I appreciate the tape bymy all-time favorite band but

Tape? he shouted incredu-lously. I go to all this troubleto arrange a Beatles reunion for

your birthday and you think its atape?

The Miller 64s were startingto take effect and I was not to beintimidated.

Listen, Ninja, Ive seen youdo some amazing things-somebordering on the miraculous-butJohn Lennon and GeorgeHarrison are dead.

So was Paul McCartney in1969, he countered.

But all that Paul is deadbullsquash was just a hoax toresell old albums as was thatbusiness about him having adouble, I argued.

Or maybe all four of themhad doubles, stated the Ninjacalmly.

But that would mean that theguy Mark David Chapman killedin New York and the quiet Beatle

who died of cancer were notreally John and George-is that

what youre saying?At that moment a startlingly

exact replica of John Lennon

stuck his head outside theAlligator Bar door and demand-ed, Any chance of getting abeer in here, mates. Were allthe way through Side 6 of the

White Album and our throats arebloody dry.

Ninja smiled and nodded inmy direction, but I was reducedto stammering.

How-what-who? Oh please,let me get you a 64.

Thanks, mate. You must bethe birthday boy. Hey guys,come out and meet Bungalow

Bill, John called.One by one, they emergedfrom inside the Hilton-PaulMcCartney, George Harrison andRingo Starr.

But how? I was still inshock.

It wasnt easy, said Ninja,but I have friends in lowplaces.

Then a sudden brainstorm hithim without any test of theemergency warning system.

Hey! Why dont we let theseguys pick your Final Four? In atournament as unpredictable as

this years, their guess is as goodas any.

He seemed very pleased with

his idea.Come on, Beatles. Youve

been in the States long enoughto know something about thisMarch Madness. George, yougo first.

All right, said the mostspiritual one of the group. Ipick Georgetown.

Wait a minute. Thedeep-thinking, Hare Krishna,sitar-playing disciple of the

Maharishi of India just chose ateam based solely on his name?

I like to keep things simple,understated George noticing myastonished look.

That could be good advicefor a lot of people, Ninja noted.Okay, Ringo, youre next.

The Cockney accent of thedrummer once known as RichardStarkey was unmistakable.

Well, since we were onceknown as the Fab Four-or FabFive if you include our producerGeorge Martin who was known

as the Fifth Beatle, Ill take theteam who once had a Fab Fivein the 90s-Michigan.

Sound reasoning that doesntmeet a beat, agreed Ninja.John, youre up.

Now if this was really JohnLennon, the next response wouldbe clever, satirical, and perhaps abit crude and vulgar-dependingon your taste. After all, this wasthe man who had proclaimed theband more popular than Jesusand had mocked repetitive bluesartists with the not so subtleWhy Dont We Do It in the

Road.He did not disappointIll honor bonny Prince

Charles with my selection ofIndiana, John pause for effect.After all, he was In-Diana morethan anyone else.

The group roared with laugh-ter but the merriment was short-lived when Paul made his choice.

Speaking of royalty-and sinceI am knighted-Ill take a team

with a royal title-Duke,proclaimed the southpawbass player.

John was swift to react-asperhaps some old wounds werestill festering.

I figured youd go with thoseblue-bloods, you elitist pig. SirPaul, indeed.

Why dont you mind yourown business, Mr. Power to thePeople-or should I say your Onobusiness, shot back Paul.

Just when it seemed a brawlwould break out, another figureemerged from the bar carrying aFender Stratocaster.

Whats all the commotionout here? Somebody shot the

sheriff?Arguably the greatest white

guitar player that ever lived

strolled out to join thehistoric gathering.

Eric Clapton? I gasped.But you werent one of theBeatles.

Eric played lead on WhileMy Guitar Gently Weeps,admitted George. I was busyon the production end andthought we could use the help.

Ninja was not ready to let goof his selection process just yet.

What about it SlowHand-you got a favorite inthe tourney?

Claptons eyes began to twin-kle and he began to strum theFender while launching into a

variation of one of his classicsBay-la, youll bring them to

their knees, Bay-laExcuse me, Mr. Clapton-and

this is no reflection on yourclever parody-but I dont evenknow if Baylor made thetournament, I said sheepishly.

Then give them to me in the

Womens Tourney, he replied.Ive always liked women betterthan men anyway.

Ill say, interjected George.You stole Patti Boyd awayfrom me.

Before another argumentcould ensue, the Great Ninjaintervened with still anothersurprise.

Cmon guys, lets load up.Well be late for our gig. Paul

and George, you ride with me.John, you take Ringo and Ericin the Mustang. The ampsand mikes

Wait a minute, I interrupted.You mean this band is going toperform somewhere?

Were playing at the oldGonzales Country Clubtonight, announced John.Going under the name ofBanana and the Bunch-the

group with appeal and well seewho shows up. Itll be like theold Cavern days in Liverpool.Have a great birthday mate-and Ihope we passed the audition.

I watched them ride away withthree superstars in a 64 Mustangand two others in a 49 Manuretruck with a crazed Ninjascreaming, I always wanted tobe a roadie for a rock group,with equipment in the back.

That night when I went tobed, I put on my God forgiveMark David Chapman-I dont

t-shirt, cued up When Im 64on my sound system anddreamed of Strawberry FieldsForever.

Oh, and I also made a smallwager on Georgetown,Michigan, Indiana and Duke tomake the Final Four.

Give peace a chance.

Dr. Rob,

I Love What YouDo for Me.

27


28/44

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30/44

THEGIVINGQUILT2013

QUILTEXHIBIT

WHERE:

Lamar Dixon Expo Center,

Trademart Bldg.,

9039 St. Landry Rd.,

Gonzales, La. 70737

WHEN: Sat., April 6, 2013

10AM - 4PM

INFO: Food and drinks will

be sold on the premises

2013 QUILT EXHIBIT

All displayed quilts are

donated by the quilter to the

charity of her/his choice.

Quilt submission is free.

Admission and parking are free.

Door prizes will be awarded

throughout the day. Must bepresent to win. There will

be cash prizes and ribbons

for Viewer's Choice,

Challenge Choice and Judges'

Choice Quilts.

SPECIAL EXHIBITS

We are privileged to present a

heartwarming Quilts of Valor

documentary produced by Iowa

Public Television about TheQuilts of Valor Foundation.

Host and co-producer

Marianne Fons, of Fons &

Porter's Love of Quilting, tells

the story of the unique and

important work of this

foundation. Free QOV patterns

will be available.

A fidget apron for patients

with Alzheimer's Disease willbe displayed with free patterns

available.

The following Vendors will be

available with a wide variety of

fabric and accessories:

Accurate Sewing

Machine LLC.,

Bright Hopes Quilt Shop,

Cottage Creation Quilt Shop,

Mama's Quilt Shop,

Martelli Enterprises, Mes Amis Quilt Shop,

The Borne Quilter.

The Scissors Man, Dennis

Glass, will be here to sharpen

your scissors for a fee.

Enjoy ongoing demonstrations

of some of the newest quilting

tools and gadgets.

Contemporary Fabric Artist ofLouisiana Exhibit.

ACTIVITIES

Kits will be available, at no cost,

for sewing pillowcases on-site

for the children of GRACE

camp. GRACE camp is a 5-day

non-denominational camping

experience for children ages 10-

18 who have a parent incarcer-

ated.

Kids Draw for Kids sponsored

by National Quilting

Association, is a community

outreach project in which

school age children can help

make a quilt to be donated to a

child through Baton Rouge

Quilt for Kids.

Children will have the opportu-nity to stuff fabric bears which

will be donated to Our Lady of

the Lake Children's Hospital.

PRESENTATIONS

Blessing of Quilts will take

place at 11:00 A.M., by Father

W. Patrick Edwards, of St.

Margaret's Episcopal Church

Awards and Ribbons Ceremony

will begin at 2:00 P.M.

The winner of the 2013 Raffle

quilt will be announced at 3:45

P.M. The quilt, Blue Willow,was made and quilted by Jessie

Comeaux. Winner need not

be present to win.

For directions and more

information please see

www.thegivingquiltinc.org

When You

Need RoomFor Your

Stuff

When You

Need RoomFor Your

Stuff

Free Delivery

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No Credit Checks

Lowest Price Guarantee

Low Monthly Payments

225.644.0130 cell 225.715.0977

www. coo kpo rtab lew areh ous es.c om

12537 Airline Hwy. Gonzales


31/44

Total PestElimination isjust a PhoneCall Away.

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With Gold Shield 365 all pests

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BUGGIN OUTwith Ron Barattini


32/44

Ooweeee

Maui

I am a lucky man. I think?This past month my Sisterinvited to spend 10 days inHawaii. Maui to be exact.

First it takes an entire day toget there. I flew from NewOrleans to Denver. Connected

with family, flew to SanFransisco, picked up morefamily and flew to Maui. I hadleft my home at 5:30am centraland am in Hawaii 9 oclock,Hawaiian time. I dont evenknow what time zone. Werented a car and found out wehad an hour drive to the resort.Sure is tiring try to enjoy a tripof a life time.

There was an entertainingmoment on the plane. Apassenger walked on the planeat one of the connections. He

was dressed in Oklahoma redand white. Some TexasLonghorn fans immediatelystarting razing him. He had

some good comes backs for theLonghorn fans. Then aLonghorn asked out loud,

Hey Tiger fan? Whats yourthoughts? My simple replywas, We love Oklahoma in theDome!

We finally arrived at theKanapalli Alli resort. It wasdark, I was tired so I passed outand when I woke, I was inparadise.

Let the VacayBegin with a

Round of Golf.

Like most good vacations thefirst morning should start witha round of golf and our tee

time at 7:02, sunrise.The course was magnicant.

The wind sucked. I chipped realhigh one time and thought theball was going to land behindme. As many of my golfingBuddies know my puttingstroke has a lot to be desired. I

was 10 ft. from the hole whenmy nephew spoke up and said,If you 2 putt from here hed

wear the coconut bikini top onthe beach however if I missed, I

had to wear the top.You can see by the photo Imissed. After a razing from Tim

I decided to purchase somebeer at the turn. I purchased afew Buds in the alluminumbottle shaped can. The catch

was these cans did not havetwist off tops. I inquired how I

was to open the beer. Shepointed to a small sign.Bottle Openers for Sale, $1.

What a jip.

Who saidSwimming with

the Turtlesis Fun?

The next day we woke earlyagain to take a boat trip to areef to snorkle. The boat ride

was fun. About an hour to ourdestination and at this time of

year the Hawaiian waters areperfect for whales to breed. Allaround us you could see whalesbreaching and blowing. Ilearned these were males trying

to impress the females to tryget close to her at just the rightmoment. Reminds me of a fewguys Ive seen at Park Place ona Friday night. One whale liftedhis tail out of the water andspanked it up and downover-and-over. I couldnt tell ifhe was making an impressionor got lucky.

As we approched theswimming area I must havebeen distracted by the whales.I looked around an 60% of thepeople on the boat were seasick and hurling everywhere. Iput my flip flops back on andfaced up wind.

After swimming for anhour we headed to the nextdestination, Turtletown. Duringthe travel time the deck hands,also known a Naturalist,educated us on identifying thefish we were about to see. Ilearned that the fish munch and

survive off the coral reef andafter crunching and munchingthe coral becomes fish wasteand up to 30% of the beaches inthe area is fish poo. A smilecame across my face. I remem-bered the nephew I had lost thebet to was buried in the said byhis niece. He was like JoeDirt. I got the POO on me!.

Once we arrived toTurtletown I jumped in the

water and looked for the docileSea Turtle. Before entering the

water it was explained that the

turtles were protected andanyone violating the turtlesspace can be fined up to$10,000. With little success Istarted to give up when thisgiant turtle came up by me. His

Thoughts from Bully

32


33/44

head was bigger than a softballand we were 2 ft. apart and Ican here him breathing. Docileor not Im getting a littlenervous because he is a distantrelative to a snapping turtle.Then a turtle flipper or legscrapped across my inner thigh.Oh crap. Hes was violatingmy territory. I may needPegram to defend me from the

Turtle fondler. His flipper wasright where it shoudnt be.Please dont anyone startle thisturtle because flipper thrust

would be a bad thing. Once Iwas back on board, the turtlewas identified as a female. Ididnt feel so violated.

Lets Hang Outon the Beach.

After a few days into thevacation it was a day for

hanging on the beach.Wow. Palm trees, sailboats

and 7 shades of blue coloredwater.

I sat down, took my shirt offand everyone on the beach puttheir sunglasses on. I was whitebut didnt care. Tide wouldhave been proud. Lets get thesunscreen out and hope thatit works.

Just think. I was on LittlePrairie Road just a few days agoand now I am on the beach inMaui. Im feeling social and

walked the beach and tried tomeet a few people. I spoke to acouple for a few minutes. Theythen looked at each other andshrugged and walked away.Dang it! I hate when foreignerslook like Americans. Theydidnt understand a word Isaid. Maybe? You neverknow about those multilingualforeigners. Their schoolssystems must teach phonics.

During my walk I drifted intoa Sea Walk Mall. A booth justoff the beach had oysters on thehalf shell. They were a littlebrown and golden but Ivebeen away from home andthought a taste home would benice. As I picked one up to eatan attendant stopped me fromsucking down the delicacybecause it was a pearl oysterand the booth was making

jewelry. The attendant pointedout that my LSU hat was aoyster warning sign becausesome weeks earlier a group ofpeople from Louisiana hadeatten about $650 worth ofpearl oysters in no time.Just teasing.

Dont Judge aBook by Its

Cover at the Luau

It was a beautiful sunsetafternoon. Totem poleseverywhere. A pig was cookingunderground. It almost had afeeling of the hunting camp butnot quit.

When we entered, we wereprofiled immediatley. Mynephew from Colorado had acamo hat on so the staffthought he was from Louisiana.

As the night went on thingswerent always as they seem.

First we received free drinkswith our table but not freebeer. I was givin my first FREEFruity Hawaiian drink. Dang!This drink taste good. I had acouple more when a skirt

wearing, grass halo kindaHawaiian fellow came to meetme. He looked at me and said,SEC Number 1! Are you kid-

ding? He ad learned about ourtable and his brother works onthe University of Arkansascoaching staff.

The food, atmosphere andpeople were great. The showended and as we walked out. I

thought Hawaiian Dancers

were hitting up on me. Left andright, everytime I stopped byone of them, they would strikea pose for the camera. I guess it

was their job but I was thinkingI might be sweet on the one inthe blue dress. The otherdancer, dressed in Saints colors,had my attention also. She wasslim as my pantry back homeand was making some hip sign

with her hand. I later learned itmeant, Hang Loose. I wasdown with that because the freefruity drinks had me loose.

Pearl Harbor

What an experience. Myfather was in the Army AirCorp at Hickem Air Base. He

was there on December 7th.He survived and I will not write

ascension magazine march 2013

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