bandon recorder. (bandon, or) 1904-03-17 [p ]

BANDON UKCOKDEH.

THE MODERN NOTE.

I la .Not Sentiment, lint BraveryWltk. n Uih tif Humor.

According to the modern notion, a

aian should be something of an artistIn life. He should at least appear to

play his part easily, with dash andgusto, like the acrobat who performseach dangerous feat smiling. This is

la panache, the feather in the cap ofcourage bravery with humor added.It Is the spirit in which Lungtungpenwas jaken. in which Cyrano composedhis ballade while he fought a duel, forCyrano and Alan Brock, no less thanMulvaney and Sherlock Holmes, arevery modern heroes.

Stevenson's whole life was one longdevotion to this Ideal. He carried hisill health and penury bravely and wit-tily into far corners of) the earththrough many ftnuiD' adventures. Ashe wrote to William Archer: "Themedicine bottles on my chimney andthe blood on my handkerchief are acci-

dents. They do not exist in my pros-lect.- "

The melodramatic gloom of Byron,the lachrvmose pathos of Dickens andthe shallow seutlmentalitu of Thack-eray touch the source of our tears lesssurely than the sheer uuy heart ednessand courage in the face of disease, dif--

ticultv or danger. This is the modernnote. A clever woman told me thatevery yotim: man of her acquaintancewhen lie reached a certain degree of intmacy. quoted these lines of Henley's

Under the bImlconini;s of chnncoily head Is bloody, but unbowed.

Claude Bragdon In Header.

THE KANGAROO'S STORY.

Why the Hum Throw Their VoudkAwny AV'hen Hard PrcnNctl.

"I have heard that men folk In theirblindness deem our does to be lackingIn the proper instincts of maternity be-

cause they have found that a doe kan-garoo when hunted will throw awayits offspring to save its own skin byhastening its speed. This." says OldMan Jack in the "Autobiography ofan Australian Kangaroo" in Pearson'sMagazine, "is simply scandalous--an- d

foolish."Men people are evidently not aware

that our youngsters use the mother'spouch almost up to the age of maturity.Would they have our does attempt tofly from dogs and men and horseswith youngsters weighing nearly fiftypounds in their pouches? The thingwould be impossible.

"Among us a mother is taught to tossher youngsters to a place of safetywhen she is hard pressed. If she coultnot throw it to a place far safer In tincircumstances, than her own pouch shewould turn at bay with it and face anyodds.

"In the case of my mother, when wewere chased, and sure as the hunt became dangerous she would pause, drawme out of her pouch, throw me careful13' into long scrub on her right, thenturn sharply to her left, pause againuntil the hounds had seen her and thenbe off like the wind straight awavfrom me."

WAYS OF THE MAGPIE.

The Illrd In Snrlnhle. Secretive midFoil of MlNohief.

The magpie has the same sort of sociability, the same secret iveness. tlusame thirst for education ot a certainkind the same inherent and ineradieaDie love of misanct as has that veryversatile bird the raven. Not that in intellect and strength of character she isin any way equal to the raven. Funshe has in abundance, but hardly Imnior. Conscious. humor, that hi-- h amrare gilt ol man which interpenetratesand color? everything in life. is.imiiK. possessed m germ ny the ravenand the raven alone. You see it in hiseye. in the pose of his head, in libwalk, in every movement of his body'1 he eye of the magpie is. like the witof Dickens, always on the move, nervous, excitable, glittering, scintillating.The eye of the raven is like the humorof Goldsmith. It has a faraway lookit dreams, it tnuiKs, "it bodes ami itoooes, 11 an out smiles, i lie magpiewill pick up many words, or even sentences, and the old- - superstition thatshe will only talk or talk well if hertongue Is slit with a thin and sharpsilver sixpence died a natural deathabout the time that the coins of therealm had to be "milled" and so wererendered unsuitable for so stupidlycruel an operation. -- R. Bosworth .Smithin Nineteenth Century.

Scrvniitx In tJerniiiii y.It is ditlleult in Germany for a pro

fessional rogue to enter a family as adomestic servant. There every servanthas a character book, in which the mis-tress must enter the dates of the coming and leaving of the servant, withuer character while In service. Thisthe girl is obliged to take to the nearest police Htation ami have it datedwith the ollicial stamp, thus preventingthe manufacture of bogus recommen-dations.

What She Meant."Didn't I hear your wife refer to you

ns the human mince pie?" said the euriwis person.

"Yes," answered Mr. Sirius Barker."Is that a compliment""Not exactly. She means that I never

agree with anybody." WashingtonStar.

An Usnnl."When I looked at this picture last

Week I failed to observe those goats-dow- n

In the corner.""Probably they butted In since then."Kansas City Journal.

The Time to Think.Clara- -I suppose I ought to stop and

think before I accept him.Maud-O- h. no. You'll have plenty of

time to do that afterward. DetroitFree Press.

(ulte Pure.Housekeeper - You claim to seil pure

milk.Milkman (absentmindedly) Yes'm,

absolutely. All the water we use is 01

tered and germ proof.

-- When a man tells you that all wom-en are delusions and snares, it's dough-nuts to fudge he has be :n suared by adelusion. Cooking Club.

POLLY LARK1N

r

Well, Mine. Adelina Patti has been

here ami taken her flight again, like-

wise about forty thousand big American dollars. The pleasure of hearingthis queen of song came higli, hut itwas worth every cent to those whowere fort mute enough to hear her, amithey would cheerfully pay it again forthe privilege of listening to her. Ifshe did not come up to the expectationsof Mime of her critics it looks to Pollyas if it was because these selfsame crit-

ics desire to make themselves as stand-

ing alone in their critics' row and thatthey have agreed before hand toddlerwith their brother critics in regard to

drama, opera, etc. Fortunately suchcriticisms have little weight with an in-

telligent and cultured people who canjudge for themselves. That she is theQueen of Sting no one can dispute. Themellow notes of her charming voicewill dwell with the vast audience thatlistened intently as he soared into therealms of melodv ami then burst intothunders of applause as she finishedand bowed her acknowledgment of theevident appreciation. Those who heardher years ago state that her voice hasnot lost anything in richness and tonein spite of the threescore years and oneto her credit. She has gone, and un-

doubtedly this is her last appearance inSan Francisco, but the memory andthe echo will linger until death ringsdown the curtain or old age playshavoc with tickle mind ami memory.Hundreds of people who found it hn-jHtssi-

to attend either concert, themost desirable seats, being beyond theirmeans, crowded liefore the theater hop-

ing to catch a glimpse of Pattiassheentered the opera-hous- e, or better still,hoping that a fragment of sting fromher wonderful voice would lloat out tothem. Who knows but what it did.If they could not be present at the feastthey were willing to accept the crumbs.Patiently thev waited until the concertwas over and the crowds of people,radiantly happy and tilled with enthusiasm, came iHUinng from the operadoors. Jewels were Hashing ami leau- -

t ifu 11y dressed women were in evidence,but they cause 1 not a passing glance.I'liey wanted a sight of Patti, and whenhe had taken her departure for her

private car, Craig-y-no- s, they werercadv to retire but not liefoiv.

Father time has I teen wondrous kindto Mine. Patti, for in spite of her ac-

knowledged 01 year, she does not lookmuch over 40 years. Her face is won-

derfully smooth ami velvety, and sheMates that she uses no cosmetics orface creams of any description andclaims that she is younger than herhusband, Baron Cederstroin, who,, toJ.ill!vu Vial. n? Uffl1. U--

-

as Ix'ing a noble Swedish gentlemanand the very soul of honor, ami evidently thev area devoted couple.

Patti ay that the secret of her neverhaving any wrinkles is that she neverworrie- -, and that is a 1 letter recipe forkeeping the face smooth, velvety andyouthful looking than all the costlycosmetics, lotions ami creams of thebeauty doctors. She never reads un-plea.-

things, never reads the pa-

pers, and if critics say things that arenot very nice to hear, she simply passesthem by. Life is ttni short to liMeii ttiunplea.-ai- it things.

"But," says a friend, commentingtin tiiealMive, "Patti is famous and shecan all'ord to ignore public opinion andlet it go in tine ear and out the other.She is the nightingale, and while sheis trilling and soaring in the realms tif

what does she care for critics.They are nothing more or less, particularly if thev are unfavorable to her,than a Mock tif crows quarreling andchattering among themselves. Not sowith us. rnkind criticism hurts, un-

kind words leave the wound after thethorn is removed that in itself causesworry ami creates the troubled mindthat mirrors itself in wrinkles andfrownson our face. Why should Pattiworry? She is the most favored tif

mortals, tone lias tiie whole music-lovin- g

world paying homage tti her,and with that little musical Mute inher throat she has earned a snug for-

tune. She never in her life has knownwhat it was to worry :is to whether themoney would le forthcoming to paythe next mouth's rent, or where thenew school iKHiks were coming from,how ami where she was tti get thewherewithal to pay the doctor's bill..ItM think, tine night's salary that shereceives would put us tin .Easy street.She is the peerless songster and standsalone on the pedestal of fame with anadoring ami admiring . throng at herfeet and a fortune at her command. Jfhe worried or complained she wouldrove herself ungrateful for this great

gift that has been bestowed ujMin her.I wonder if Patti would not worry if

-he --aw her adorable Baron Ceder--

roin going languidly tti work everymorning with a hollow cough rackinglis thin body and the hectic Mushreeping up into his pale cheeks. 2soilace tti rtt until the silent city tif thelead claims its victim, no money to

give him change tif scene and a warmerlimate that would mean life amiicalth, for there are the wee folks to

think about who he knows will soon lieeft without a protector ami provider.smile, Polly; tti be sure it is a grim

smile and not rippling over with mirthiml light-hcartedne- ss, when I hear alerson who has never a care in the

world and money at their commandsay 'don't worry.' Why should theyworry? However, it is the grimmestkind of sarcasm tti hurl at tine who

has everything tti worry alMiut in theway of sickness and poverty. Talk ischeep, Polly, but experience is whattells, and if it be so bitter and so hardto bear that it leaves its tell-tal- e markson the face, then it is the uukindestcut of all for the rich and care-fre- e person to say to them, 'don't worry,' andthe admonition carries as much weightwith it as a feather soaring throughthe air."

The lady quoted aliove has had astormy pathway through life from hergirlhood, or, I should say, her child-hood up, ftir she was left with the

of a household and thecare of several little brothers ami sis-

ters when she was but a mere childherself, ami her life has been a seriestif tips and downs. "She was born un-

der an unlucky star," says the astrol-oger, ami she llrmly believes it. Shedoes not look for any change that williK'ttor her condition on this earth, andno one can convince her that there is aray tif light ahead.

On the other hand I know tif a charm-ing little lady who has been through asea of disapiKiintments, and death hasknocked at her door again and again.She 1ms risen from poverty's ranks byher own cllbrts and is now living incomfortable circumstances, but stillcontinues tti wield the brush ami cray-ons that have given her comforts thatwere denied her for so many years ofher life. Some times she would breakdown and then all the pent-u- p feelingsthat she had been bravely striving tohide would lie revealed. All theseheartaches which she so bravely kepttti herself told on her lovely face andbrought anxiety, worry ami care lines.Recently I met her and saw such achange in her and she was so brightand cheerful that I commented on theimprovement. "1 have just waked up'tti the fact, Polly, that it does not payto worry ami fret line's life away. I

have buried the past and am deter-mined never to resurrect it. I am liv-

ing for to-da- y, not for yesterday ortomorrow, and 1 am getting all I canout of the present. Another thing, I

will not listen to a sat! siory and havenot time to read tif distressing accidentsthat I cannot help by knowing any-thing alMiut them ami they only servetti make me wretched. 1 have beenliving long enough in the shadow.From henceforth now and forever I

shall live in the sunshine, and it is thebright, cheerful companions 1 shallseek and turn a deaf ear tti sat hi ess amiall tales tif wte. It is the keynote tohappiiiessoii this earth I am thoroughlyconvinced, and I only wish 1 had wakedup tti the fact long ago, for not onlymyself but others would have been thelietter for it.

Jf- -A Unique 1vp

The KickajKHi Indiajf f Oklahoni:hvo jiJrout six miles e:ist of Shawnee

--They are trying tti go tti Mexico tti jointhat part tif the trilc which Med thereduring the War tif the Rebellion. TheKit kaptMis are ruled by a woman chief.1 Ier name is Wapahoko. She is 10 yearsold. The title was inherited. Wapahoko is already in Mexico, and her advice tti the tribesmen tti follow her hasbeen accepted by all except twelve, whoare Mill tin the Oklahoma reservation

1 hese Indians have a very peculiarmarriage custom. They simply selectheir wives, ami if the selection is mutual they reside together as man amiwife and nothingis said. There are noscandals among these people. Hu?bands and wives are true to each other,and the quiet understanding is considered its sacred as our marriage vowsThere are few acts that can be termedcriminal among this small band of Indians. M tinier is seldom heard of, anddeath is the penalty for the crime,Kobliory from each other is unknown,All their possessions could be piled together in the street and no one of themwould think of taking the propertyTheir religion is the same jus Columbusfound among the Indians when he firstlanded in America. Thev believe thatthere are two spirits the great goodspirit, and the bad spirit. The religiousworship is carried tin every dav. Jtconsistsof dances and singingand beating of tom-tom- s. They are very delicate regarding their belief, and seldomtake a stranger into their confidence.

A New Element, Victorium.An account tif his discovery, tif the

ew element, which he calls victorium,has recently been given jby Sir William Crookcs, F. R, S., to the RoyalSociety. It bus a pale-brow- n color anddissolves easily in acids. Its oxide isless basic than that tif yttrium, butmore so than the greater part of theearths of the terbium group. Thechemical properties of victorium diM'erin many respects from those tif yttriumbut, generally speaking, it may lie saidto occupy an intermediate position lie--tween this element and terbium.

Thoughtful Before Death.Mrs. Angeline Harrington, agetl 93

years, committed suicide by takingpoison at her home in Uhepachet, R. I

In making her plans for death shethoughtfully ordered a. large amount ofgoods from a grocery store, saying thatshe wished a plentiful supply tif foodfor those who would attend her funeral.

In the Dakota Presbytery, composedentirely of Indians, there are twenty-seve- n

churches and 14o8 communi-cants, ministered tti by fifteen Indianpreachers.

From 1897 to JIK)2, inclusive, the totalexcess tif exports amounts to the almostineoniprehensiblesum of 3,1 111,000,000,

an average of some $250,000,000 a year.

In Sweden a milk Hour is made fromthe skimmed milk and Muds readymarket.

AUTING WITHOUT ORDERS.

General (irunt'N Tribute to CencriiHhcrldan'n Judgment.

Senator Hoar in his "Reminiscences"says that at a dinner where GeneralGrant and other distinguished menwere present Commodore Alden re-

marked that there was nothing he dis-liked more than a subordinate who al-ways obeyed orders. "What Is thatyou are saying, commodore?" said Pres-ident Grant across the table. The com-modore repeated what he had said."There is a good deal of truth In whatyou say." said General Grant "One ofthe virtues of General Sheridan wasthat he knew when to act without or-tier- s.

Just before the surrender of Lee.General Sheridan captured some dis-patches, from which he learned thatLee had onlered his supplies to a cer-tain place. I was on the other side ofthe river, where he could get no com-

munication from me until the nextmorning. General Sheridan pushed onat once without orders, got to the placetlfteen minutes before the enemy andcaptured the supplies. After the sur-render was concluded the first thingGeneral Lee asked me for was rationsfor hs men. . I issued to them the sameprovisions which Sheridan had cap-tured. Now, if Sheridan, as most menwould have done, had waited for ordersfrom me Lee would have got off." Sen-

ator Hoar adds this comment: "I lis-

tened with wonder at the generousmodesty which, before that brilliantcompany, could remove one of thebrightest laurels from his brow andplace It on the brow of Sheridan."

SCHOOLBOY BLUNDERS.

AmuMliifr MlMtnkcn In ExamlnntlonIa pern by Hrltlnh I'upll.

The following list of amusing mis-

takes made by British schoolboys intheir examination papers Is compiledby the University Correspondent:

Iron Is grown In large quantities formanufacturing purposes in S. France.

The sun never sets on British possessions because the sun sets in the west,and our colonics are In the north, southand east.

The diminutive of man Is mankind.Question: Define the first person.

Answer: Adam.Blood consists of two sorts of cork-

screws retl corkscrews and white cork-screws.

Asketl to explain what a buttress Is,one boy replied. "A woman who makesbutter," and another, "A female butch-er."

Teacher's dictation: His choler roseto such a height that passion well nighchoked him. Pupil's reproduction: Hiscollar rose to such a height that fash-ion well nigh choked him."

A Job's comforter is n thing you givebabies to soothe them.

A skyscraper Is anfovertrimmed hat.Political economy Is the science which

teaches us to get the greatest benefitwith the least possible amount of hon-

est labor.Au einolunienl. Jsa soonungjiit'dL

cine.In the United States people are put

to death by elocution.Gravity was discovered by Izaak

Walton. It is chietly noticeable In the.autumn, when the apples are fallingfrom the trees.

SHELLFISH LANGUAGE.

Curlou (HckltiK Soiindn Ilenrd onthe Water at MKht.

Most seamen will tell of curious click-ing sounds heard on calm nights at sea,and the origin of the noise seems so al-

together unaccountable that It has of-

ten createtl some alarm among super-stitious fishermen.

A distinguished naturalist made acareful study of the sounds on manyoccasions and found that it was not ti.

sustained note, but made up of a multi-tude of tiny ones, each clear and dis-

tinct in Itself and ranging from a hightreble down to a bass. When the earwas applied to the gunwale of the boatthe sound grew more Intense, and insome places as the boat moved on Itcould not bo heard at all.

On other occasions the Sounds resem-bled the tolling of bells, the boonMng'ofguns and the notes of an nWIan harp.

For a long time he was unable totrace the cause, but at length discov-ered that the sounds were made byshellfish, hundreds of them openingtheir shells and closing them withsharp snaps. The noise, partly mufilodby the water, sounded indescribablyweird. He was finally led to the con-

clusion that as the shellfish made thesounds the.v probably had some mean-ing and that the clicks might possiblybe a warning of danger when the shal-low water was disturbed by the boat.

He Liked Vouiik People.In his last work, "Facts and Com-

ments," Herbert Spencer gives a cu-

rious bit of self revelation. lie con-

fesses that, though he particularly likedthe society of young people. It boredhim to an unendurable extent if theyworried him with unintelligent chatter,and that to avoid this it was his cus-

tom to ask them some question whichcould not be answered without a gooddeal of thought. He was accustomedto base his judgment of their Intellectsupon the answers returned, and we canwell imagine that those who were sud-

denly confronted with some such prob-lem as "Why Is the sea salt?" musthave regarded a drive with the greatphilosopher as something of an ordca..

London Globe.

The .llodeMtjr of Ilruhma.At an interesting dinner party given

by Joachim, at which were present alsohis friends, Professor Horn of Naplesand Von Herzogcnberg, the composer,an amusingly characteristic scene occurred. Joachim In a few well chosenwords was asking us not to lose theopportunity of drinking the health ofthe greatest composer, when before hecould say the name Brahms houndedto his feet, glass In hand, and calledout: "Quite right! Here's Mozart'shealth!" and walked round, clinkingglasses with us all. Ills old hatred ofpersonal eulogy was never more prettily expressed. Leisure Hour.

Information at Hand.The Rev. Dr. Fourthly I confess that

this particular passage In the book ofRevelation lias always been somewhatobscure to me.

The Rev. K. Mowatt Lftlghlly-Wh- y,I cleared that all up In the first sermonI ever wrote. I shall be glad to let youread It some day. Chicago Tribune.

NEW SHORT STORIESA Quarter on Account.

Judge BIley, formerly of Virginia, butnow of Washington, met a friend onthe street the other day and said dra-matically:

"Bill. I will allow you to loan me aquarter of a dollar."

"Not me," said Bill. "I have beenMaking you for years, and I am goinglo quit."

"Very well," responded Uiley. "Ifyou put It on those grounds, I havenothing further in common with you."

Bill walked on up the street, and ashe did his conscience smote him. Hethought that perhaps the judge mightneed the money, and he went into theBiggs House, put a quarter In an en-

velope and told the clerk to hand it toRiley when he cajne In to ask for hismall. While he was standing thereRiley came In.

"Any mail for me, Mr. Clerk?" beasked. The clerk handed Riley the en-

velope with the quarter In It. Rileytook It suspiciously. lie had not re-

ceived a letter In five years, althoughhe asks for his mall every day. Heopened the envelope, found the quarterand then began to laugh, while theman who put the quarter In the envel-ope stood by watching.

"What Is it, judge?" asked the clerk."Why," Riley replied, "here's a

scoundrel who has owed me $0 for sev-

en years, and now he pays me a quar-ter on account." New York World.

Scluvnb and the Hammer.When Charles M. Schwab was man-

ager of the Carnegie Steel works hewas one day showing a party of emi-

nent foreigners through the mills andfurnaces. A German nobloman ofgreat wealth displayed unusual Inter-est In the 12o ton steam hammer. Hehad never seen anything larger thanthe eighty ton one at Krupp's worksIn Essen. Schwab spoke In high praiseof the workman who operated the mon-ster, and the usual invitation was ex-

tended, "Place your hand on the an-

vil, and Greene will stop the hammer

"NOW YOU CAN TAKK TIIE COUNT'S PKESEST 1'llOM MY OWN HAND.

within a hair's breadth q It" "Notmy hand, but, with pleasure, mywatch," said the German, placingsplendid jeweled timepiece on the anvll. Down came the immense mass ofsteel, and Greene, his hand on thelever, stopped It a hundredth part of aninch from the crystal.

When he went to hand the watchback the nobleman said, "No, Mr.Greene, I want you to keep It asmemorial of an Interesting occasion.'Greene was too much embarrassed tosay a word, but stood there with hishand outstretched till Schwab steppedforward and took the watch, saj'lng,("Never mind, Greene; I'll keep It foryou if you're afraid to take It fromtins count." A few minutes later theparty again passed the spot, amSchwab, summoning Greene, said,"Now you can take the count's presentfrom my own hand," and presented tothe mechanic the watch wrapped in a$100 note.

One on the Illshop.This is the story a Kansas City trav

eling man brought with him fromOmaha. It is "on" Bishop Millspaughof the Episcopal diocese of Kansas,who lives In Topeka.

It seems that the good bishop was recently fishing, and he caught a whopper. At a cafe In Omaha last week hewas describing this fish when a stratiger Joined the party, and the man whohad first heard the fish tale said to thebishop:

"Now tell that story again."The bishop, his identity unknown to

the late arrival, did so, describing minutely the fish's dimensions, weightund the like. When he had done, theman who had asked him turned to thelate arrival and said:

"What do you think of that?""Well, had you told that yarn I'd

have said It was a monumental lie. butI don't know your friend here. Introduce h'iii. will you?"

"I would like to present you to Bish-op Millspaugh of Topekj;," said thefirst man.

Tableau. Kansas City Journal.

The Dining: Itoom Wan IJettcr.There Is a remarkably small church

In Langdale. England, and a story, istold that when Sir George Rose wasdining on one occasion with the lateLord Langdale, patron of the living,mention was made tif the building. "ItIs not bigger," said Lord Langdale."than this dining room. "No." returned Sir George, "and the living Is nothalf so good."

Insrrotvn Appreciation.Wealthy Patron This portrait doesn't

resemble my wife a particle- - not a par-ticle.

Artist No; it doesn't look much likeIter, but, oh. dear sir, the technique, thetechnique!

A Critical Summitry."What do you think of that writer's

"Oh," answered Miss Cayenne, "hehas said two or three clever things and

'several thousand others." WashingtonStar.

YOUR DAILY MEALS.

i Little Sermon on What to Eat andWhen to Eat It.

If you cat a hearty dinner at the close

3f each day's work, a dinner made up

f food elements which have a chanceto build up the body during the night'srest, then you should eat a light break-

fast, so that your new energy may go

into your morning's work Instead ofbeing all used up in digesting yourmorning meal.' But If you have not eaten the properquantity and kind of food for dinneryou must eat a hearty breakfast, orelse feel faint from undernourishment

You should not eat meat for breakfast, for meat should only be eaten ata time when complete rest can be

taken. If you feel the need of meateat eggs Instead or nuts.

You should cat a well cooked cereal,but know this: The cereals which canbe cooked in three minutes are hardlyworth the eating, because they have solittle nourishment In them. Oatmealthat has beeu cooked several hours Isvery good. Half cooked oatmeal Is sopoor a tood that It Is almost a poison.Cornmeal must also he well cooked, too,if It Is to do Its best work for the hu-

man body and soul.And if you will eat bread for break-

fast eat the German zwieback, crisprolls or brown toast Hot bread andcakes clog your system and will makeyou cross and uncomfortable beforenoon.

Coffee could be a healthful drink if Itwere properly made and not boiled un-

til It Is bitter wlh tannin. Clear cof-

fee, one cup of ft, may have no 111 ef-

fects on your nerves. Coffee, withcream, one cup or two cups, will makeyou bilious.

But, whatever else you eat or drink,eat fruit and a great deal of fruit, forbreakfast. If you want a fruit tonicdrink the Juice of an orange and halfa lemon. If you want fruit for a foodoat apples or bananas. Or If these donot agree with you eat apple sauce,cooked prunes, cooked canned fruit.

WHY HE DID NOT GET ON.

He had low Ideals.He did not dare to take chances.He had too many Irons in the fire.He was never a whole man at any-

thing.He thought a good business should

run Itself.He did not appreciate the value of

appearances.He did not know how to duplicate

himself In others.He let gruff. Indifferent clerks drive

away ins business.He trusted Incompetent friends with

responsible iiosltlons.He would not change fairly good

methods for better ones.He did things over and over again

because he lacked system.He thought he knew all there was to

know about his business.He tried--to- . economize by cutting

down his advertising appropriation.He was a good, honest man. but he

did not do business In a business way.Success.

A Home Which Thought.Instances of great Intelligence In

horses are almost as numerous as thehorses themselves, but there are fewwhich make prettier stories than this.related in La Nature by a Parisian.

At Vincennes, In my childhood, hewrites, my father had two spiritedhorses of fine blood. One day while oneof them. Brunelle, was passing be-

tween two walls with my little sisteron her back the child slipped and rolled between the horse's feet.

Trundle stopped Instantly and heldone hind foot In air. She seemed tofear to lower that foot lest she shouldstep on the child. There was uo roomfor the horse to turn nor for a man topass In.

In that uncomfortable position, withlifted foot, however, the horse stoodpatiently while an attendant crawledbetween her forefeet and rescued thechild.

Fleld'n Flnlnhlns: Toneh.Eugene Field was once visiting the

house of Richard Henry Stoddard inNew York. During the evening a cer-

tain well known physician dropjied inHe was a serious man and a bit pompous. The talk turned on diet. "Doctor,said Stoddard. "I've heard that youeat two eggs at breakfast every morninir the year round." "No." said thedoctor emphatically. "No. On the contrary." "On the contrary!" cried Stoddard. "What's the contrary of eatingtwo ercs?" "Laying two eggs." cameIn deep, solemn tones from I'ield.

A L'nlqne Monument.It Is hot often that a monument Is

erected In honor of the tactfulness of ahostess In a trying situation. One ofthe few such. If not the only one. is abowlder from the battlefield of Harlemheights, removed to Bark avenue InNew York, to mark the site of thehome of Mrs. Robert Murray, who en-

tertained and so detained the Britishotllcers under General Howe while theAmerican troops under General Putnam were escaping from the city. Themonument bears an Inscription onbrass setting forth Mrs. Murray'sachievement. What a difference theremight have been in American historyhad Mrs. Murray been a less capablehostess!

A Cnrlonltj-- .

"The man I am looking for." said themature looking spinster sentimentally,"must be utterly unselfish, brave as alion, tender, truthful as the day. Indus-trious, Intelligent, thoughtful, of dis-tinguished presence and one who neverdrinks, smokes, gambles or uses pro-fane language. I shall not mind if lieIs poor-th- at will not matter."

"Not a bit." remarked the damsel'scynical old father grimly. "He'd havea fine chance of making money, mydear."

"How so, papa?""Why, they'd give a fortune for a

man like that In a show."

Cantlon."Do you mean to say you didn't give

that horse thlof a trial by Jury?"'We didn't dare," answered Broncho

Bob. "If anything as unusual as atrial took place the whole town 'udurn out to see it, and some one would

be sure to sneak in ami steal some morelorses." Exchauce.

CHOICE MISCELLANY

Price of a Family Skeleton.Ancestral graves prove one of the

Most serious obstacles to railway mak-

ing In China, and wherever possible theengineers have avoided them. Some-

times exorbitant prices are demandedfor the removal of an ancestor's re-

mains, but through the Influence ofChinese Interested In the railway some-thing like uniformity has been arrivedat, and the average price now paid- - fora grave is 4 taels (about 10 shillings)."Feng shul"v presents another obstacle.The literal translation of the term Is"wind, water," but It Is best explainedas a system of geomancy which rulestho dally action of the Chinese as arace, from the setting of a date for amarriage or a funeral to the location ofa city. The site of every city, town orvillage has been fixed by geomancersafter consulting the oracles. Each com-

munity has Its guardian dragon or somesuch hypothetical monster, and woebetide the Individual who proposes tocut it In two with tunnel or railwaytrack! Engineering Magazine.

The "Promoter" In Entcland.They have In London an "Inspector

general in companies liquidation."whose report on stock company Insol-vency for 1902, Just Issued, Is not with-out Interest on this side of the Atlantic.

The total number of cases In whichwinding up proceedings were com-menced during the year was 1,02;), ofwhich 1.G01 were voluntary liquida-tions, 10 voluntary liquidations subjectto supervision of the court and 112 com-pulsory liquidations by order of thecourt. The total number of new com-

panies registered In England and Waleswas U.niW. The total number of liqui-dating companies during the year wasIn proportion to the new companies reg-

istered 95 per cent as against SO percent during the previous ycrtr. In tenyears the amount Involved in liquida-tions was about,?2.S00,000,CM)0, of whichthe total loss to the Investors wuh ap-

proximately $1,000,000,000, a total re-

spectable by comparison with Ameri-can figures.

The Sham Brier Pipe.The other day It was reported from

Prussia, says the Westminster Gazette,that, though the amber Industry hadbeen dull of late, the trade In IniitJuamber had been highly satisfactory.It now seems, smokers will be Interest-ed to know, that even the brier rootpipe Is not what It Is supposed to be.The brier root of commerce Is the rootof the large growing heath (Erica ar-bore-

Brier In this connection is saidto be a corruption of "bruyere" (heath).

The brier root Industry has had asomewhat curious history. First begunIn the Pyrenees some fifty years ago, ittraveled along the French Riviera andthe LIgurian coast, taking Corsica bythe way, to the Tuscan Maremma andreached Calabria in the south. By thevery nature of the business, when act rtaln district has been exhausted ofall its roots the industry must come toan end there. The Italian branch Is notexpected to survive more than tenyears.

The Uesrlnnlnff ot Cotton Thread.Ex-Provo- st Clark of Paisley, Eng-

land, has been relating the origin ofcotton sewing thread, which was 0Tused In that town in the weaving of"heddles" as a substitute for silk,which was stopped by Napoleon In1S03, when he seized Hamburg. Mr.Clark's grandfather and his brotherthen bethought them of cotton, whichworked so smoothly that Mr. Clark'sfather, then a youth, took to recom-mending It to women Instead of linen,then mostly used. Originally it wassold In hanks or skeins. These the wo-men had to wind Into little balls, asthey do a cut of wool at the presentday. Wishing to convenience them,young Clark on selling a skein ofthread would sit down at a pirn wheelanil wind the thread on n bobbin, forwhich he charged a halfpenny. Thishalfpenny was refunded when the emp-ty bobbin was returned. Such was thebeginning of cotton thread.

American Fnnilllex.According to the statistical atlas of

the United States newly issued by thecensus otllce, the average number ofpersons to a family has declined from5.G In 1S50 to 4.7 In 1000. In 1ST0 the,average was a tritle above 5.

In 1900 the average ranged frommore than r in Texas, North Carolina,West Virginia and Virginia downthrough 4U In Iowa and Illinois to 3.0in Nevada. Nearly all the southernstates lead in the size of families, whilethe six New England states, with NewYork, California and Washington,bring up the rear. New York's averageis about 4.3.

Larjse Mileage.Distance lends enchantment to serv-

ice in congress. The delegate from Ha-waii will receive nearly $l."i.0UO duringhis term of two years in addition to hissalary of $10,000. besides drawing anallowance for clerk hire and stationery.The $l."i.000 is the bonus, or rather themileage, which he receives because helives In the Sandwich Islands. A dele-gate to congress from the Philippineswould be able to collect about $3omileage if there should happen to be anextra session during his term. Other-wise he would get about $2-l.(X-

Sad Sow For Gnm Chewer.The saddest news that ha ome out

of Maine In a long time Is that thespruce gum crop Is short. This meansthat chewing gum will cost mora ibisyear or gum chewers will get less fortheir money. Most of the gum put upby the great chewing gum concernscomes from the spruce trees of Maine,and the shortness of the crop, therefore,is of direct Interest to every messengerboy, typewriting girl, saleswoman andcash girl who has the gum chewiahabit

One Sweetlr Pleasant Thought.Georglana We are not old.Juliana Oh, yes. we are, my dear.Georglana Well, we are Just aa

young as any girls of our age in town.Indianapolis Journal.

Perverse.He Won't you let me civo von intone kiss befere I co?She Will Just one satisfy you?Her-Y-ea, darling.She Then I won't give It to you.

Standard.