authentic manhood

Authentic Manhood Manhood Promises as We Stand at the

Starting Line

Session 1

I. 5 of the presuppositions

A. The first is this: _____________________________________

B. Secondly, I ______________________________________________

• AnthropologistMargaretMeadsaidthesewordsasshespannedhumanhistoryindifferentculturesanddifferentsocieties,“Thecentralproblemofeverysocietyistodefineappropriaterolesforitsmen.”

C. Thirdly,Ibelieve____________________________________________1. PsychologistRolloMaypickeduponthisagenerationago.Hemadethisprofoundstatementbackinthe1950s: “Theclearestpictureofanemptylifeisthesuburbanmanwhogetsupatthesamehoureveryweekdaymorning,takesthesametraintoworkinthecity,performsthesametasksattheoffice,lunchesatthesameplaces,leavesthesametipforthewaitress,comeshomeonthesametraineachnight,spendsatwo-weekvacationattheshoreeverysummerwhichhedoesnotenjoy,goestochurchbutdoesnotreallyknowwhyhegoes,andmovesthrougharoutine,mechanicalexistence,yearafteryear,untilhefinallyretiresatage65andverysoonthereafterdiesofheartfailure,possiblybroughtonbyrepressedanger.Though,Ialwayshavethesuspicionthathediedfromboredom.”

D. Ibelievethereisnolofty______________________ofmanhoodtodaythat’scompellingtomen—thekindofmanhoodthatcallsmenup.

E. Ibelievethe_______________________hashelpfulinsightstoalloftheabove—toalloftheotherfourpresuppositions,theWordhastime-testedwisdominit.

Sothesearemy5presuppositions:1. Manhoodisinastateof______________________;2. Confusedmencreatemajor___________________;3. Confusedmensettlefor______________________;4. Thereisnolofty____________________________ofmanhoodcallingusup.

5. _______________hashelpfulinsightstoalloftheabove.

III. Historical roots of our present crisis in masculinity.

A. Thefirst,isthe__________________Revolutionthatoccurredatthebeginningofthe20thCentury.

B. Thesecondmajoreventwas_____________________,whichfurtheraddedtothedisconnectionbetweenfathersandsons.

C. Andthencameathird,sweepingeventinthe1970s–whatI’llcall________________________.

IV. Promisesonthefrontendforthoseofyouwhofinishthisadventure

A. Firstofall,you’llhaveaclear____________________ofmanhood.

B. Secondly,youwillmakesomesignificantpersonal____________________aboutyourself.

C. Youwillmakesomenew_________________herewhoarepursuingacommongoal.

D. Andthenthelastthingisthatyouwillhaveyourownpersonalized____________________forachievingauthenticmanhood.

Authentic Manhood

Session 2Why Men are so confused

II. Every Man has a suitcase that he carries around with him

III. Men are in a state of ____________________________.

IV. Why are men in this state of confusion

A. ___________________________________

B. ___________________________________

C. ___________________________________

D. ___________________________________

Prov.29:18

V. Authentic Manhood Revolves Around Three Critical Issues

A. __________________________________________

VI. Iwanttotellyouaboutfivewoundsthatcouldbeinyour suitcase.

A.______________________________________________

A. _____________________________________________

B. ____________________________________________

C. ____________________________________________

D. ___________________________________________

VII. For a man to become and Authentic Man:A.Hemustcometogripswithhis_________________,unlockhissuitcase,and________________________withsomewounds.A. Hemustestablishaclearandcompelling_____________and____________________todirecthisfuture.

B. Authenticmanhoodcomesbycreatinga____________workableplanforourlives.C. Thesweetnessofitwillbesteppinginto________________manhood!D.

Authentic ManhoodSession 3

The Absent Father Wound

VIII. The Absent Father WoundA. Thereisanincredible_______________thatasonislookingforinhisdad.B. Thereisakindof_____________________thatasonwantsfromhisdad.C. Thereisacertainfather_________________thatasonislookingforfromdad.D. Ifafatherdoesnotpaintapictureaboutlifewith__________________,________________,and_________________,thenasonislefttohimself1. Hewillbeginto_______________intohimself2. Hissoulwill____________________3. Hebecomes____________________,no_______________________,no________________________________inhislife.DavidBlankenhornsaid,“Asafather,thegoodfamilymanisnotperfect,butheisgoodenoughnottobereplaced.”

Asonwhoislivingnexttohisdad,whoislivingalifeofhonorandhasconvictionsaboutlifeandcancommunicateinwaysotherthanIsaidsoisadad!

Prov.17:6E. Asadad,wegetauniqueadvantagewhenasonisborn

F. Ifadadwilltakeadvantageofthisnaturalinclinationtowardshimandblesshisson,youwillhaveasonofsubstance.Ifnot,thenatsomepointinhislifehewillhavetodealwiththewoundofaabsentfather.

IX. The Absent Father WoundA. Definition:1. Anongoingpsychological,social,orspiritualdeficitthatwouldordinarilywouldbemetinahealthyrelationshipwithdadthatwasnotandnowmustbeovercomebyothermeans.

B. Writethreephrasesthatwoulddescribeyourdad.

C. Describeourrelationshipwithyourdad.

X. The Absent Father Wound results in:A. _______________________________________

Eph.6:4

Col. 3:21

B. TheSecondAbsentFatherWoundresultsin__________________or__________________________.1. Anger__________________pain.

2. Addictions______________________thepain.

C. TheThirdAbsentFatherWoundresultsinsenseof______________________________.

D. TheFourthAbsentFatherWoundresultsin____________________________.

XI. What every son wants and needs from His Father:

A. __________________________________withhisdad,whichresultsinexperiencesthatbuildgreatmemories.

B. Everysonneeds____________________with________________answers.

C. Sonswant______________________through_____________________.

D. Lastly,asonneedstoseeDad’s___________________________.

Matt.3:16-17

Men’s Fraternity

Session 4Facing The Father Wound

XII. We are, to some degree, _________________ of our past.

XIII. We are in some ways _______________________by our past, until we consciously and willfully choose to break that __________________.

A. Thegoodnewsisthatyoudonothavetoliveunderthatcontrolanylonger.

XIV. Past ___________________ often have a powerful, controlling effect over our lives.

XV.ThedefinitionoftheFatherwound:A. Anongoingpsychological,socialorspiritualdeficitthatisprimarymeantwiththefather,butitwasnotandnowmustbeovercomebyothermeans.

LanceMoreal,awriterforTimeMagazine,wrote,“Thedamagecausedbytheabsentfathersmaybesevereandmaylastalifetime.Sonsneedtheirfathers.Today,inafeministculture,manhoodisbeingminimized,pushedtothemargins,tothepointthatafatherisnotevenneeded.Ifthishappens,youarecreatingpeoplewhoarecrippled.Thiswillcastashadowoverkids’livesforalifetime.”

Mal.4:6

XVI. Six Proactive Remedies for the absent Father Wound:A. ______________________________________________B. Hereishowtotouchthiswoundresponsibly.1. Choosingto________________________________

Heb.12:9-10

Heb.12:1

2. Thesecondwayischoosingtobelieve_____________________.

Rom.12:19-21C. ______________________________________________________________

D. ______________________________________________________________

E. _____________________________________________________________

F. ____________________________________________________________

2Cor. 3:5

G. ___________________________________________________________

Men’s FraternitySession 5

The Overly-Bonded-With Mother Wound

XVII. A bookend of the absent father woundA. ThemosturgentdomesticchallengefacingtheUnitedStateisthe_______________________asavitalsocialroleformen.B. Whateverydadshouldgivehisson:1. A___________________causethatgoesbeyondtheself.2. A__________________visionthatgoesbeyondsuccesstosignificance.3. A___________________thatbuildshonorableconvictions.XVIII. ExaminingthemotherwoundA. Ifdadwasgoneornotinvolved,whocomesrushingin__________________________

“Otherthandad,noonehasinfluencedmorethepersonyouaretodaythanyourmother.Thewayshehashandledyourneedsasachildhasshapedyourworldview,yourrelationships,yourmarriage,yourcareer,yourself-image,andyourlife.Whatwelearninourrelationshipwithourmotherdeeplyaffectseveryareaofouradultlifenow.”

B. Tendenciesare:1. To____________________againstmomaswellaswomenthatareauthoritiesoverthem.

2. Toover_______________.

C. AdefinitionfortheOverly-Bonded-WithMotherWound

D. OtherCharacteristics1. Thiswoundisvery_________________.

2. Itisnotawoundofabuse,neglect,orabsenteeism,butawounddisguisedas______________________________.

3. Itisnotawoundof_____________________________________.

a) Ilookslikelove,butitfeelsasyougetolderandolderlike____________.(1) Itissopowerfulthatitcan_________________________.

4. Sourcesofthiswounda) Itbeginswithan______________________________.

b) Itisinflictedby:(1) __________________________________.

(2) Nextsourceofthiswoundis___________________________.

(3) Thenextsourceis____________________________________.

Gen. 2:24

(5) Thefinalsourceis________________________________.

XIX. This wound can create a feminized man.

Authentic ManhoodSession 6

FurtherClarificationoftheMotherWound

XX. Mother and SonsA. Clarificationonhowmomcreatewounds.1. Itisnot____________________________inflicted.

B. TwoSignificantbreaksbetweenmotherandson:1. ________________________bondandpostpartumblues.

2. Thenextbreakisan_________________________bondandpost-powerblues.

Threewordsidentifythismanwhobecomesoverlypassiveinregardstowomen,becauseofhisrelationshipwithmom-thesoftmale.

3. Thirdly,sonscanbecomeoverly______________________________inregardtowomen,iftheyhavebeenthreatenedbymom.

Initsextremeform,itleadstodomesticviolence,abuse,rape.Rapeisaguywhoissothreatenedbywomenthatthisishiswayofgettingeven—butithasrootsthatgowaybackinthatregardtomom.

C. JesusandHismother

1. Luke2:43-50Jesuswentmissing.Luke2:42Luke2:48

Luke2:49

a. JesussaidthatHemust__________________________withHisFather.

2. John2:1-4Jesuswasinvitedtoawedding.John2:2-3

John 2:4

3. Matthew12:46-50-LaterinJesus’ministry

Matt.12:46

Matt.12:48-49

John19:26-27

XXI. Two Wrong Response to the Wound:

A. Menbecomeoverly_____________________inregardstowomen.

B. Menbecomeoverly______________________inregardstowomen.

XXII. If not passive or dominant, then what?

A. Somewheremenneedtobeinstructedinmanly__________________________thatinspiremanly_____________________,notpassivity.

B. Somewheremenneedtolearnaformofmanlyleadershipthatisneitherdominantorabusive,but_______________________________________________________________.1. Youngwomenneedtolearnthatleadershipis_______________________toyoungmen.

C. Justwheretheycanlearnthisisthe_____________________________.

XXIII. 7 suggestions for you for healing this wound. 1. Understandingthatbreakingmom’sover-involvementisgoodfor____________and_____________!2. Recognizethatyourultimategoalistobecomeamanwhosevisionisfixedonwhat_____________thinks–notonwhat______________thinks.3. _______________complainingorstrugglingwithmom.4. Communicateyour_______________.5. Usethe________________inyourlifetoreportbacktoforclarity,encouragementandaccountability.6. Ifyouaremarried–listenclosely,guys-tellyour_____________you’vegotanover-involvedmominyourlife.7. Finally,insomecasesyoureffortstoestablishahealthyrelationshipwithmomwillresultinatimeof_______________________punishment.

“DearMom,

Iwanttobehonestwithmyfeelingsaboutyou,soIwillthrowawaymynaturaltimidityandsaywhatIthink.Manyaspectsofyourrecentlettertomeareliketheworstaspectsofouradult,mother/sonrelationshipforthepast20years.Twowordscometomindtodescribethisrelationship:dominationandmanipulation.IfeellikeanytimeIresistyourdominantwill,thenyourresponseismanipulative,particularlytoinducetheemotionofguiltinme.Oftentimesinthepast,thishasworked,althoughtonoone’ssatisfaction.Hopefully,wecannowbreakthiscycle.

Iwillcontinuetohonoryouasmymother,butIcannotfulfillyourneedsinanyarea.Wecanacknowledgethiswithoutgoingtotheextremeofatotallycut-offrelationship.Isuggesttoyouthatifyoufindourrelationshipverypainful,thenyourexpectationsfromitarenotproper.IhadaskedthatwemayhavearightrelationshipasamothertosonbeforetheLord.PleaserecognizethatasagrownmanImustfollowthecalltobeaman;nolongertiedtohismother.ImustfollowtheBiblicalcommandtoleavemyparents’homeandtocleavetomywife,andpleasedon’tuseemotionalmanipulationtechniquesonmeinthefuture,forIamplanningtoresistitfromnowon.Thisletterisfromme—notfrommywife.IplantoletBettyreaditbeforeIsendit,butonlyyouandIcanbeaccountableforourrelationship.Bettyisneitherthecausenorthesolutiontoourrelationalproblems,andsheneverhasbeen,althoughinthepastyouhaveblamedherasthecause.Thiswillnodoubtbeaslow-movingstruggle,butit’stimetoworkonanewkindofrelationshipbetweenus.IloveyouandIawaityourreply.”

That’sprettygood,isn’tit?Here’shismom’sreply:

“DearSon, Maybethereisnolegalmeansforyoutogetridofmeasyourmother,orasBetty’smother-in-law,butIcansuretrytomakeiteasierforyoutobefreeofmeemotionally.IherebygrantyoupermissiontoforgetthatIexist,everwas,oreverwillbeapartofyourlifeorthelivesofyourchildren.Irealizethatisthewayitisanyway,butjustincaseyouoccasionallyfeelburdenedwiththefactthatIactuallydoexist,andyouhavetoputupwithme,Iwanttoremovethatobstacleforyou.I’lladmitthatIamnotdoingthisjustforyouandthekidsasIamtrulywearyofthehostilityandrejection,aswellastheshatteredhopesanddreamsIhadforus.Ihavewaitedsolongforustobefriends–thatkindoffriendsthatIbelieveweoncewere.It’snoteasytosaygood-byetosuchanimportantpartofmylife.Butyouhavereallyleftmenochoice.

WithalltheloveI’llholdinmyheartforyouboth,Yourex-mom

P.S.IknowhowJesusfeltwhenHespokeinMatthew23,‘O,howIhavelongedtogatheryoutogetherasahengathersachickunderherwings,butyouwerenotwilling.’”

Authentic Manhood

Session 7Disconnected From Other Men and

Mentors

XXIV. Definitionofthiswound

A. A_________________,_____________________,and_________________deficitthatresultsinmengoingitalone.

XXV. Every man ___________________ from the company of other __________.

A. Menneedothermen____________________himon

B. Menwithoutothermencheeringhimwillbe_____________________andwillstarttolookforcheersinsomedangerousplaces.

1. Whatwehavebecomeisa__________________AmericanMale.

ChuckMillerwrites:“I’mtired,blessed,butalone.Oneyear,wesawaten-foldincreaseinbusiness,andthatisexciting,butI’mtiredbecauseIfeelalone.Yes,Ihaveawifewhoisverysupportive,buttherearenomensupportingme.WhenIreadinExodus17aboutMosesbeingliftedupbyothermenlikeAaronandHur,twofriends.God,IneedsomeAaronsandHursinmylifetojoinme.”

C. ThereAreSignificantDownsidesToIsolation(havingnoothermeninyourlife.)1. Onedevelopsovertimea____________________perspectiveonlife.a) Onoftheworstthingsthatamancandois__________________onlywithHimself.b) A______________________ofmenwillhelpamangetarealsenseofwhatheisandhowheiscomingacrossMargaretMead,Americanculturalanthropologist,wrote,“Women,it’strue,makehumanbeings,butonlymencanmakemen.”

Prov.27:17

2. Secondly,asignificantdownsidetoisolationiswhatIcall_______________living.a) No__________________inaman’slife.b) Amanlefttohimselfwithliveinrealmsof_____________________and________________________

________.3. Thirdlythelossofmotivationforthe___________________areasoflife.

4. Lastly,thereisalossof________________________________________.

D. WhatScripturessayaboutfriendships:

Heb.10:24

Theword“stir”istheGreekwordparoxusmos.

E. Whatyoucandotoencourageanotherman?1. Reach_________________toothermen.

2. ________________________amantomeetregularly.3. Donotjustmeet,butenjoy______________________together.

4. Getrealandshareyourheartandbe___________________and_______________________challenging.a) FourA’sinrelationshipbetweenmen:(1) A________________________(2) A________________________(3) A________________________(4) A________________________

Authentic Manhood

Session 8The Importance of Having A Mentor

In Your LifeXXVI. EveryManBenefitsfromthecompanyofa____________________ or other men giving meaningful input to their life.

A. Amentorissomeonethatisgoingtobea_________________________inyourlife.

B. FromDadtowhom?

C. Mentorscancomeinallshapesandsizes:1. __________________________mentor2. __________________________mentor3. __________________________mentor

D. CharacteristicofAMentor1. Onewho________________________________withyou.

2. Secondly,heisonewhoprimarily_______________________________.

3. Thirdly,heisonewhoseeksto______________________thedevelopmentofyourgifts,whilealsoseekingtoprotectyoufromcostlymistakes.

4. Fourth,heisonewho______________________________inyou.E. Ismentoringdifferentthandiscipleship?

F. Whatdoesamentorbringtothetable?1. 2. 3. 4.

XXVII. TheBibleisabookfilledwithmentorsandmentoring.A. Someexamples1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6.7.

B. SomeScripturestosample1. Ex.18:13-192. 1 Thess. 2

XXVIII. The Marks of a Mentor 9 (from Howard Hendricks book As Iron Sharpens Iron)A.

B.

C.

D.

E.

F.

G.

H.

I.

XXIX. The Impact Of Mentoring A. OntheMentor

XXX. Four things that you can do if you need, but lack a mentor. A. ______________________________________forwisdom

B. Godand________________courageously

C. Don’tgetdiscouragedifyouare________________________

D. Geta_______________________togetherandthengoaskhim.

Ifyouwanthappinessforanhour,takeanap.Ifyouhappinessforadaygofishing.Ifyouwhathappinessforayearwinthelottery.Ifyouhappinessforalifetimehelpsomeoneelsesucceed.

Authentic Manhood

Session 9The Depravity Wound

XXXI. Nurture vs. Nature Wound.

Rom.7:14-20(TheMessage)

XXXII. Born To Win?

XXXIII. Half truths for why we’re losing:

A. Somesaywearelosingbecauseofpoor_____________________.

B. Somesaywearelosingbecauseothersareto_______________________.

C. Somesaythatwearelosingbecauseofalack____________________________.

D. Somesaywearelosingbecause_________________________________________.

E. Finally,somesaywearelosingbecauseofdefective_________________________.

XXXIV. The Hidden Truth Behind All Of Life’s TroubleA. Weareallcursedwithaconditionknownas________________________________.

B. Definition-Weareall________________and________________creatures,at_________________bynaturewithourcreator.

C. Threestatementsthatdescribesthistotaldepravity:

1. Iam___________________fromGodandunderHis________________________.

Rom.5:12

2. Ihaveinheriteda____________________naturethatnohumanagencycan______________.

Psa.51:5

3. My_____________________naturecorruptsmylifewith_________________.

D. TwoImplicationsofthisfundamentalflaw:1. Totaldepravityrequiresa_______________________________.

2. Secondly_____________________my_____________________istheessential___________________infindinga_________________________relationshipwiththelivingGod.

Authentic ManhoodSession 10

The Good News Solution To The Depravity Wound

XXXV. Two Perspectives / Two Wounded Hearts

2Cor.5:17

Fromtheleftmystory.

Inyouroutline,therearethreethingsthatIcametotermswith.A. Ididn’t____________much;butIknewthat__________________.B. Ididn’thavemuch__________whatIdidhaveIputin____________________.C. Ididn’t________________muchatfirstoutwardly;butsomething____________________changedinsideofme.

Titus3:3-7

XXXVI. From the very far right … Old Saint Nic’s story, and it is found in John:3.John 3:1 John3:2-3John3:4-5John3:5-10

A. “fromabove”-A_________________________________rebirth.

John 1:12

John 1:13

B. “must”-ThattherealthingisAn______________________________rebirth.

C. Thirdly,noticetheword“You.”Therealthing-A_____________________rebirth.

Authentic Manhood

Session 11The Search for Self Worth/Self

EsteemPt. 1BelievingTheLie

XXXVII. The Goal of _______________________.

A. Tounderstandsalvation,wemustlookatthe_______________________.1. RememberthatGodisaGodofpurposeandcreateseverythingwithapurpose.

B. Whyarewe_______________?1. Godchosetomakemantohaveaneternallove_________________withHim.2. Manwasmadetobelovedwithaninfinitelovebyit’s_________________.

C. Mansawthathewas___________________thanalltheanimals.1. Whenmanwasnamingtheanimalshesawthattherewasa________________betweenhimandthehighestprimate.2. Unlikethem,he:a) Existedtoenjoy____________________withGod.b) Had_______________choice,forwhichhewasresponsible.c) Manknewthathewasthe_____________oftheCreator’slove.

3. Thecreatormadeitknownthatmanwasto_____________withthecreatorinthe________________oftheplanet.a) Hewastobethe______________ofcreation,_________________toGod.

D. Allofthiswasman’sby_________________.1. Manlivedinitwithouta___________________.2. ManneverthoughtaboutGodlovinghimmore_____________than_________________.3. Mandidnotwonderifhad__________________hisrighttowalkinthat___________________.

4. Manwasahuman________________

XXXVIII. The Temptation and Fall A. The __________________1. satanliedto__________________,believedhisown_____________andconvincedotherspiritsthatthe_________________wastrue.2. satandepictedGodas____________________them,holdingthembackfromtheirfullest____________________.3. Theliestartsbysatantellingthemthattheircompletionashumanswouldbefound_______________ofGod.B. Thiswouldmean:1. Theywouldhaveall______________,all_________________and_____________________inthemselves2. Theywouldbe________________-____________________.3. Itwasnotacallto____________________,Godwouldstillbethere,buttheywouldbe_________________________________ofhim.Rom.1:25John8:44

XXXIX. Man In _________________.

A. AdamandEveare_____________________ofwhotheyhavebecome.1. They___________________themselvesinthepresenceofeachother.2. They_______________inthetreeswhenGodcomestovisit.B. GodasksAdamsomequestionsthatrevealsAdam’s_________________about_____________________.GEN3:9-101. Adamhaslosthissenseof__________________2. Heisnow___________________himself,noton_________________,buthis___________________actions.3. Adam’ssenseofworthlessnessistwo-fold:a) Heis__________________and_____________________it.b) Adam’sactionsaresaying_______________________________________________,andIknowthat__________________________________,andwill_________________________________toyourrage.”Luke15:4

Authentic Manhood

Session 12Man’s Reaction To His Shame

XL. After the Fall

A. Thefirstitemwastohandlethepainfulfeelingsof______________and________________________.1. Theymadeacoveringand____________________.Gen.3:7a) AdamandEvebroughtalltheir_______________________powerstobearonfindingawaytoadequately____________________theirnakedness.b) Theyhadtotallylosttheirsenseof________________andsoughttheperfect____________________thatwouldmakethem_____________________________toGodandtoeachother!c) Theyweresayingthatnoonecould________________themor____________________________them,certainlynotGod.

2. Thiswasthefirstcrudeattemptto____________________man’sshameofbeinga______________________mortal.a) AdamandEvewerenolongerhumanbeingsliving_________fromarelationshipwithGodbutb) Humandoings,livingonthe________________,maskingtheir_________________and________________________innerselveswith____________________________.

3. InseekingtopurgehimselfofshamebeforeGod,manbegantouseother__________________________.a) Adamtookhisownsenseofabandonmentandrejectionandhurledthemathis_________________.b) Helookedforrelieffromhissenseof_________________________bytryingtomakeherlookevenmore_________________________.

Gen. 3:12 c) AdamwassayingthatGodgavehima________________humand) Hewastryingtodisassociatehimselfwithhis________________andhis__________________.

Luke18:11

Rom.1:25e) TryingtofillthevoidofGod’sunconditionallovebyturningtoothersandcreatedthingsisthefruitof___________________.

Jer. 2:13

XLI. God’s Response

A. ThequestionsthatGodasksman:1. ________________________________________2. ________________________________________B. Theseareexpressionsof:1. __________________________2. __________________________C. ThisgivesagreatpictureofGod’s________________________________love,notbaseduponwhattheyhave________________orwill________,buton____________________HeisandwhatHewill

____________.

Gen. 3:15D. Godspeaksofthe_______________________________E. WhatJesusdidF. WhattheGospeldoes

Authentic Manhood

Session 13 The Cost of Independence

XLII. The New Testament

A. WhenmancamefromtheGarden.1. Hebelievedthathecouldandshouldbeas_________________,andhis____________________wasfoundeduponthisbelief.B. TheNewTestamentdescribesman____________________ofGodasthe_______________Adam.Thosethatbelievethelieandactonthatlie.1. Believingthisliemanisnowdeterminedtomeetallofhis_____________needsoutsideofthefaithdependenceupon__________.C. Nowmanseekshissenseofbeinglovedfromother____________.1. Performanceinlifebecomesidentity.2. InsteadofperformanceaswhatIdoitbecomes_______________3. Ahumandoingissomeonethatdefineshis_________________/___________________basedonperformanceandexpectancyfromothers.D. Therecomesapointwhenthisemptinesshasnotfilledthepain.1. Thehumanracehasthenmentalityof“I’mlookingforlove,butwillsettlefor_________________________________”b. UntilyourinnerrelationshiptoGodisdealtwith,youmaychangefromunacceptabletoamoresociallyacceptablewayoffindingasubstituteformeaning.c. LovecomesfromGodnotfrompeople.

E. AnotherpartoftheLie,isthatwethinkwearesupposedtobe_____________________.

Mat.7:3

E. Thedevilpromisedthatwewouldbeall____________________,thatwecouldanswereveryprobleminthehumanrace.

1John4:7-8

1. LookthislovecomesfromGod__________________people.

a) Thisloveisspontaneous,notdrivenbythe_____________tobelovedinreturn.

b) ThislovedependsuponGod_________________us.

F. Thisknowledgebringsdramaticchange.1. Wenolongerexpectfrom________________,theunconditionallovethatonlycomesfrom_____________________.

Authentic Manhood

Session 14The Web of Denial

XLIII. The Domain of Darkness

A. Inhisoriginalsin,manbroughthisentireexistenceundertheauthorityofthe__________.B. Thisliebecamethedomainofdarkness,andmanlivestheirbyhisownchoice.John3:18-19

C. Spirituallyspeakingmanhasbecome____________________.1. Manlivingin________________truthsD. Therearetwokindsofshame.1. Goodshame;______________________________________.a) WhenweturnbacktoGod:(1) Our________________________isswallowedupinHislove(2) Our________________________isswallowedupinHisstrength

E. Becauseofthisshameitleadsusrightintoalifeof______________________.

XLIV. The First DenialGen.3:7-13

A. Aftertherebellion1. Adamandhiswifehadanurgentneedto___________________themselves.2. InresponsetoGodquestionoflove“Adamwhereareyouandwhathaveyoudone”?3. Adamdoescomeout,butallhedoesis_____________________.

XLV. The Second DenialGen.4:1-9

A. Thedenialof__________________

Aslongaswearelookingtootherhumanbeingsforloveandacceptanceandidentity,thenwespendmylifehidingmytrueselffromthem!

XLVI. The Effects of DenialA. _______________________1. Inordertoeasythepainofoursinfulshameandoursenseofworthlessness,weescapeinto____________________and______________________

Psa32:3-4

XLVII. The AnswerA. JesusidentifiedHimselfasthe_________________inaworldlivingalie.

John14:6

1. Jesusmanifestedthe_____________,andthe_______________oftheFather.2. Heshowedusthat:a) TheFatheris______________________loveb) Heisseekingourhighest_______________andfullest_____________ashumans,whichislivingin

relationshipandunionwithhim.c) KnowingtheveryworstabouthumanityHecommunicatedthatHe_________them.

B. Wecomeintothelight.1. Byknowledgethe_______________about______________andthetruthaboutGod.2. Wearetoobeythegospel,submittingourselvesasrebelstothe________________love.3. Salvationisnotaonetimeevent,butitisa___________________thatinitiatesaprocess.4.

Authentic Manhood

Session 15The Search For Love

XLVIII. When we say “I have come to Christ”, who has really come to Christ?A. Wemustunderstandwhothat_________________isthatcametoChrist.

Ex.20:4-5

B. Theword“iniquity”means_______________or________________.1. Itdescribes_____________asitaffectsgenerations.

C. Youstandattheendofabranch.

D. TheIdealFamily

E. Factorsthatcontributetofeelingsofbeingun-lovedandunworthy.

XLIX. How We Grow Into AdultsA. AchildsearchingforlovethatonlyGodcangivewilltake_________________thatisavailableastheymoveintoadulthood.

1. Theygetthis___________________mentality.2. Westartsearchingforunattainablegoals,tryingtogainself-worthby______________.

B. Whatwebringfromthe_______________leadsusintoour_______________.1. Iwillnever...2. Iwillnever...

L. WhatIsTheAnswer?A. Manypeopleaskwhy…1. GodsaidthatHewouldneverleaveusorforsakeus.

Luke4:18

B. Jesus’deathwasthe_______________,unconditionallovefromthefather.

Psa.22:6-8

Isa.53:3-5

LI. We see the unconditional love of God.A. Allofour________________________arepartoftheoutworkingofthelie.B. Wearesavedfromrebellionandthedarkpast,notbyour_______________atself-atonement,butby_____________________Hissalvation.C. Wethenputtodeaththehuman_____________andbeginanewpersonofhuman_________.D. TheHolySpiritbringstousthereasonforourcreation,whichto____________withGod’sownlove.

E. Thisloveisgivennotoutofaneyeof________________,butoutofcompassionforthepersonwelove.

Authentic Manhood

Session 16Healing the Hurts

LII. See the lie as it really is—a lie.A. Nowthatwehaveseenthelieforwhatitisandweturnourlivesbacktoa__________________________________uponGod.

Luke23:34

LIII. New Testament applicationA. ThewritersofthelettersoftheNewTestamentmovesintoan_____________________oftheGodcenterlove.1. Thepurposewastogivesustoolstodealwithallthethingsinwhichwebroughtwithusintothe

Eph.4:17-32

1. “Putaway”____________________________________________a) ____________________2. ________________________________becomestheheartcausingustobroodoverthewrongdonetous.3. ThefactthatPaulistellingbelieverstoput__________________________outoftheirlives.4. Whydowewanttoget_______________________?

LIV. How do we forgiveA. TheLifeofJosephgivesusabiblicalmodelofaforgivingperson.

1. Josephwasabused,andhischildhoodwasfilledwith_____________________________.2. HisearlyrevelationsofGod’spurpose______________________thegapbetweenhimselfandhisbrothers3. Heissoldandendsupa_____________________houseandbecomeschiefadministrator.

LV. How do we go about ________________________ those that have hurt us.A. Wemust____________________thinkwecanforgivebyourownwillpower.

Col. 1:11

B. ThisscripturesgivesusthreewordsthatdescribethealmightypowerofGodthatisunleashedtothehumanandwhenthisunleashedwithinusweobtain:1. ____________________and_____________________-Youwillbeabletogothroughwhateveranybodycandotoyouoranycircumstanceyouarein.2. ____________________________________-Lovethatkeepsonforgivingandkeepsthepositionofforgivenesstowardthepersonthathashurtyou.

3. Godhasgivenusthepowerinwhichtochooseto__________________________.a) Col.1:11theword“power”isusedb) Itistheword“Dunamis”anditusedtodescribedthepowerofthe_______________________.

John16:13

C. Manyareafraidto_____________________.D. HowJosephgoesaboutforgivinghisbrothers.

Gen.50:19-20

E. Forgivenessis:1. Forgivenessis_______________________apersonintothehandsofGod,forHimtodowhatHewills.a) Theforgivenessmeansto____________________or__________________away.

F. Jesusdiedfortheirsinsaswell.

1Pet.2:21-23

1. Forgivenessis_____________forgetting.

2. WhydidGodallowitinthefirstplace.a) Becauseofthe____________________,weliveinatwisted,rebelliousworld

G. Godshowshispowerby_______________________________Hislove.

NomattertheabuseandhurtsyouhavegonethroughGodwaswithyouandyouhavegottenthevictoryandGodhaswonbecauseyouhaveheardthiswordandlearnedhowtodealwithhurtandpain.

LVI. It is now time to bring our thinking up-to-date.A. MakealistofeveryonewhohashurtyouandreleasethemtoGod.1. Youare________________longerresponsibleformakingthempay.2.

Authentic Manhood

Session 17Filling The Void

LVII. Outside of __________________ in Jesus, our identity has been blurred by the ___________.

A. We____________________ourselveswithoutperformance.

B. We__________________.

C. We__________________forothers.

D. In Christ

Phil. 4:13

LVIII. The nature of Christ’s love

1John4:7-10

A. WhatdoesthisEnglishwordLovemean?1. Generally,wearespeakingofthe_____________________loveofthelie.2. Another,IlovedbecauseIneedforyoutolovebebacksothatIcanfeel_______________.B. TheNew-TestamentusesawordthattheGreeksdefinedasaweakkindoflove____________.1. Agapeisthevery______________________ofGod,Godislove.a) IneverythingthatGodis,Heis________________.b) IfHeislove,thenwecannotthinkoflovehassomethingthatHe________________.(1) ItisHisvery________________!(2) ItisHisvery_________________!(3) LoveisthewayGod________________!

C. IfGodislove,thantherecanbenoother_______________________loveexceptthatwhichoriginatesinHimasasource.

1John4:7

1. Theword“Of”______________________________.

2. God’sloveisnot:a) BornoutofHis_______________ofustobecompleteanemptypartofHimself.b) God’sloveisnot______________________forus.c) Isnotaresponsetoour________________,ortoany______________________________wehaveaccomplished.d) Isnotbaseduponourintensededicationto__________________better.e) IsnotbasedonHisknowledgethatsomedaywewillbe_________________enoughtobeloved.

LIX. God is not seeking anything for__________________________ .A. Hisloveforus.1. Seeksour_____________andourfullest_______________and________________ashumans,thatwelostinthefall

2. Thisloveseekstomakeushappyaswearelivinginthe_____________:3. Thislovewantstobringnew________________________tous.

B. BecomingaChristianismorethanreceivingpardonfor_________________.

John13:34-35

1Thess. 4:9

LX. Notice Paul’s method of determining a believerEph.1:15

Col. 1:4

1John 3:14

A. God’ssupernaturallovetoabeliever1. Tobefullyaliveinthe____________,____________,and_______________manytimesinbodywemustunderstandthislovefromGod.2. Itisoppositeofthe________________loveofthelie.

LXI. What does Agape look like in a believerA. Itiswithout________________or_________________,trulyafreechoice1. Itdoesnot________________it’sown2. Itdoesnotneedtobe______________or_________________it’sobjects.3. Itdoesnotactoutof______________or__________________orabandonment.4. Itdoesnotariseoutof____________________

B. Agapelooksalotlike_________________1. Hewasnotcompelledbyoutsideforces,but________________choose.

John 10:15

2. Agapelovewillneverdoforsomeoneelsewhattheyshouldbedoingfor_____________.3. Agapeunderstandseachpersonisresponsiblefortheirowndecisionsand_____________.4. Agapeloveforcestheself-destructingpersonto__________________hislifestyle5. LoveisfromGod,andsolivestruth.Lovetherefore,willnotcloseit’seyesto__________inordertomakeeveryonehappy.6. Agapeisnot_____________,butrespectsthewishesofthosewhomayhaveproblems.7. Agapedoesnotneedtobe____________________.

1Cor.13:4-8

LXII. What is toxic love?A. Itis______________andcapableof__________________ifitdoesnotgetit’sway.1. Itis______________,_______________,_________________andinturnwantstohaveexclusiveattention2. It’sa) Itispushyb) Its__________________c) Itisirritable,angryandharborsbitternessd) Itdoesnotfacethe_____________.e) Itwillalways______________.

LXIII. What shall we do?

Authentic Manhood

Session 19Looking from within - to looking

forward

LXIV. We now start to look forwardA. Inthefirsthalfwestatedourpresuppositions:1. _______________________isinastateof________________.2. __________________mencreatemajor___________________.3. __________________mensettleforless.4. Thereisnolofty__________________ofmanhoodthatiscompellingtomentoday.5. The____________hastheinsightandanswerstoalltheabove.

2Tim.3:16-17

LXV. The Promises:A. Youwillhaveaclear____________________________________ofmanhoodB. Youwillmakesomesignificantpersonal________________________aboutyourself.C. Youwillmakenew_______________________whoarepursuingacommongoal.D. Youwillhaveapersonalized__________________________toachievingauthenticmanhood.

LXVI. Two Ways Of Living life involving These WoundsA. ProblematicMasculinity1. An______________________ismade.Icameintothisworldandeverythingis__________andeverythinghasbeen_____________________uponme.2. Soyouburythe__________________.3. Asyougrowolderisstartsto__________________out.4. Thereisnowaproblem_____________thathasbecome___________________.5. Theresult,problematicmanhoodwill__________________away.B. TheWayofAuthenticManhood1. Wenowknowthatwearenotinnocentanymoreandthe________________isme.2. Weare__________________fromGodandwehaveissuesthatwemustdealwithnomatterourenvironment.3. Whenweare___________________,wenolongeruse__________________tocoverupbadbehavior.4. Butwelookinsideourselvestoexamineour_____________,thenwerepentifneedbeandturntoJesusforhelp.

LXVII. Advantages of this New Authentic Masculinity A. Christinmanandthenmanbeginstomoveintheenergyofthat____________________________.B. Insteadofbeing____________________bythewoundsofthepast,thisnewmaninChrist__________________them,andthenembracestheseknewtruths.C. Thisnewmanaccepts_______________________________forhislife.

LXVIII. RatherthanignoringthemasculinityofJesusChrist,thisnewauthenticmaniseagertopursea________________masculinityfoundinJesusChrist.A. Thisnewman__________________himselftomakehardchoicesandashedoesthisnewmanemerges.1. JesussaidtomenaroundHim,_______________________.2. Whenamandoesthis,hewillbedifferent.3. Whenanauthenticmanmakesthatkindofdecision,excusesofthepastarenolonger____________________.4. ThatiswhatChristianityandauthenticmasculinityisallabout.

Authentic Manhood

Session 20Genesis and Manhood Pt. 1

LXIX. The Genesis myth.

A. Mythisnotsynonymouswith_______________________1. Webster’sDictionarydefinesamythas:a) Mythisanyrealorfictionsstorythatappealstotheconsciencesofpeoplebyembodyingideasorrealities.B. Writersofthescripturesconstantlyappealbackto___________________.1. Genesissetsupthe__________________structuresbetweenmenandwomenandwhythechurchissocialorderedthewayitistoday.2. Sothesefirstthreechaptersembodies____________and____________ofallofhumanity.C. Realmythexplainsandmeasuresour____________________.1. Thekeywordhere_______________.2. ThemythofGenesisexplainsandmeasures_________________initsoriginalideal,howitwasintendedanditmeasuresitintermsas_____________________,howitplacesitselfoutasmanhaslosthisway.3. Hisnatureis______________,heis________________________fromGod.

LXX. What Does Genesis Say About Manhood?A. Overviewofthefirstthreechapters1. Chapteroneisyour_______________angel2. Chaptertwo,youare__________________inononepartofthepicture3. Chapterthree,youaregettinga_____________up.4. So,wegofrombig,tosmall,to_____________.

B. Chapter1,verses26and27.1. Fromtheverystartofscripturesthatthereisa_________________ofGod.2. Gen1:27GodcreatedmaninHisown____________________.a) ThatGodisoneinessencebut________________________inpersonality.C. GodmakesthemanandthewomenintheimageofHisown___________________features.1. CreatingtheminHisimage,thattheywere___________________endowedwiththatimage,and_________________valuable.2. Thatisveryimportant,becauseafterthefallmanhasputdownwomanasbeing____________________.3. HecreatedtheminHisownlikeness,andthengavethemthis_______________rulership.Gen.1:28

D. Partnersofcreationwhohavebeenequaledbreathedintowiththelifeandtheessenceofthe________________ofGod.

1Pet.3:7

1. NoticewhatGodcalledthem?___________________.2. Whydidcallthem______________________?3. WhywhenGodcametoearthinfleshas___________________.4. WhywhenpickingtheleadersoftheChurchtheirwere_______________men.E. Chapters2and3Godnowmovesfromwideangletoacloseup.

1. ThefirstthingthatyounoticeisAdamwascreated_________________.Gen.2:7a) Firstoftentimesspeaksof___________________.b) WhywasAdamcreatedfirst?(1) Bythemalebeingcreatedfirst,itmeantthatitmeantsomethingaboutthe_________________structuresthatwasgoingtooccurbetweenamanandawomen.(2) Adamneedtounderstandthatitwouldbeavery____________________position.

2. Adamisgivenan_________________________withresponsibilitybeforeEveiscreated.

Gen 2:15

a) GodgaveAdamthisvocationandputhimtowork,andhegavehim___________________________,whichwasgardeningandGodgavehimawillto__________________,whichwasnottoeatofthatonefruit.

3. Adamis_______________________byGodwiththeresponsibilityofleadingwithHis_____________________.

Gen.2:16

4. Adam_________________theanimals,asignalofhis________________overcreation.

Gen.2:19-20

F. Adamisgivena___________________________aphrasethatdefinesthecoresocialidentityforboththemanandthewomen.

Gen.2:181. Lookatthephrase,“comparable,orsuitableforhim”:a) Thedifferencesinmaleandfemalearenotjust_________________.b) Theyareintensely___________________.

2. GodsaysthatHeisgoingtomakeahelper.a) Ifthewomanisthe______________,whatdoesthatmeanthe______________is?

Authentic Manhood

Session 21Genesis and Manhood – Pt. 2

LXXI. Manhood insights from Genesis 2-3Gen.2:22-23

A. Adamhasawhisperof______________________inthatheisallowedtogiveher,hername.

B. Thishelpsthemtoknowhowto_________________tooneanother.

LXXII.Itisthemanwhoistoldtoleaveand__________________anewhousehold.

Gen,2:24-25

A. Itisthe____________thatistobreakawayfromthe_________________unitandthengoesandgetswomenandstartsanewhousehold.B. Whenamanleaveshisfamily,heis________________________leadershipandawomaniswaitingforleadership.

LXXIII. Genesischapterthree.Wearemovingoutofthepre-fallintothefall.A. Thetemptationseeksto____________________God’soriginalsocialandspiritualorder.Gen.3:1-5

B. Whatiswrongwiththisstory?C. Wheredoessatangotoattackthefirstfamily?_____________________

D. satantalkstothe______________notthe___________________.

LXXIV. God holds _________________, not Eve accountable for this transgression.Gen.3:8-9

A. WhodidGodcallto?_______________________.Whereareyou?

Gen.3:12-13

Gen.3:17

B. Adamdidnotresponsibly________________,but___________________listened.

C. ToEveGodsaysitisbecauseyouhaveeatenthatIamgoingtocurseyouandyour________________________.

Gen.3:16

Gen.4:5-7

LXXV. Adam’s judgment of death falls not just on him, but also on all those under his leadership. Rom.5:16-18

A. Adam,notEve,is_______________________withthefallofhumanity.

Rom.5:12-20

LXXVI. Adam renames his wife as a continued sign of his ___________________________ after the fall.Gen.3:20-21

A. TheGenesismountainsaysthatmanismaleandcreatedbyGodwitha_______________________________________.

B. Thisman’sdifferenceisnotjustphysicalbutinhis____________________andhiscreationasaman.

• Ourcalling-ifittakesusscrapingoffalltheskinonourknucklestoclimbthatGenesismountainsothatwecangettotheplacethatwestarttolookliketheleaderthatGodcreatedustobe.

Authentic Manhood

Session 22Biblical Defenition of Manhood Pt.1

I. Core Contributions of Men and Women from History and The Scriptures:A. Womenarethe_________________oflife.1. Wherethiscorecontributionis_________________,societyprospers.

1Tim.2:14-15

B. Menarethebearersof________________.Asmen______sogoessociety.

1. Genesistoldusthatmanwascreatedwithaunique____________and_____________________inmind.2. Defectionfromthisleadershipspellstroublenotjustforman,butalsofor___________________________.

II. Two Men/Two Masculine identitiesA. AdamandJesusChrist

1Cor.15:44-49

B. Theyaretheleadersoftwodistinct____________________________.

C. ThefirstAdamrepresents:

D. ThesecondAdamrepresents:

E. Howdothesetwomasculinedestiniesplayoutpractically,today?

Adam JesusFocusonwhataman______. Focusonwhataman_______.

In_________withothermen. Concernedwith___________________withothermen.

Focuson__________power. Focusontranscended______________.

Outfor___________reward. Focusedon_______________rewards.

Tobea___________. Tobe___________________.

III. ThefourdefiningdifferencebetweenAdamandJesus:A. ThefirstAdamfellintopassivity;thesecondAdam___________________.

Gen.3:6

B. Theonlyonethatcanpullusoutofthispassivestateofmindis_____________.

Arealmanrejectspassivityandacceptsthesocialandspiritualleadership.Thisisrealmasculinity.

Authentic Manhood

Session 23A Biblical Defenition of Manhood Pt. 2

I. FourdefiningdifferencesbetweenAdamandChrist:

A. ThelastAdamfellinto___________________;thesecondAdam___________________________.B. ThefirstAdamdisregardedhisresponsibilities;thesecondAdam_________________________andhelivedthemout.1. Adamsresponsibilitieswere:a.b.c.

II. What about the second Adams responsibilities.a. Awillto________________.Psa.40:7-8(MessianicProphecyofJesus)b. Hehada__________________todo.John17:4c. Jesushada________________________tolove.3. Whatcausesayoungmantoacceptsocialandspiritualresponsibility?a. Whenitisclearfromayoungagethattheprimaryresponsibilityofthewellbeingofothers___________________________________.b. Youngmenhavebeen___________________fromanearlyagebythemenintheirlivestorecognizewhattheirresponsibilitiesareandhowtoassumethem.c. The_______________________oftheheartcausesadesiretowanttheseresponsibilities.

C. Thethirddefiningdifferenceis—ThefirstAdamabandonedhispostofleadership;thesecondAdamchose to ________________________________.1. Menwerecreatedto_______________,butittakes_________________!2. JesusdidthreethingsinHisleadership.a. Hegave______________.b. Hegave______________.c. Hemade_______________________forthosearoundHim.

3. Tobeacourageousleader,everymanmustmasteronesignificantobstacle:________________________________.a. Youcannotdefinerealityby_____________but__________________.

D. ThefirstAdamsoughtagreaterreward;thesecondAdam________________.1. ThefirstAdamwasnot__________withthelifethatGodwaspromisinghim.2. ThesecondAdamknewifhe____________thecourseHewouldgetGod’sbest,thegreaterreward.

C. SecondAdamliving.Expectingthegreaterreward.1. Jesus-Hebrews12:1-22. David-Psalm27:133. Moses-Hebrews11:24-264. Paul-2Timothy4:7-8.

III. So what is a real man cut from a biblical mold?• Arealmanisonethat:

A. Rejects____________________.B. Heaccepts____________________________.C. Heleads______________________overfeelings,bygivinglifetothosearoundhim,bygivingdirection,protectionandprovision.D. Expectsthegreater______________,Gods____________________.

Authentic Manhood

Session 24A Man And His Women Pt.1

LXXVII.Afisherman2,000yearsagomadethisprofoundstatement:1Pet.3:7

A. Thisphrase“....inanunderstandingway”literallymeansaccordingto__________________________.

1. Thisspeaksof________________________________.

B. “...Grantherhonor.”1. Thisspeaksto________________and_________________.

2. Numberoneneedofawomenistoknowthatsheis___________________.

3. Awomencannotgetenoughappreciationforher________________.

C. Acts3:7b“asafellowheirofthegraceoflife,sothatyourprayersmaynotbehindered”(NASB)

1. Thisspeaksof___________________________________.

2. Whenwomendonotfeelequaltheyfeelthathavetobethe___________________asmen.

LXXVIII. Three Models of Marriage:A. TopDown____________________Marriage.1. Inthispositionheisthe___________ofhishome.2. Leadershipstyleisbeinga_____________.

3. Hisgoalis________________benefitsandtheyareforhimself.4. Theeffectonthemarriageis:a. Thereisa_____________anda_______________.

B. Thesecondoneiscalledthe___________________IdenticalMarriage.5. Inthismodelthehusbandistobea____________________.6. Leadershipstyleis___________________.7. Goalinmindis___________________.8. Theeffectsonthemarriageis:a. Itisadifficult__________________andsometimesithashard__________.

LXXIX. The third model is the _____________ by ________________ biblical marriage.A. Theguywhohasthetraditionalglassesonseeswhatword?_____________B. Theguywhounderstandspirituallifeseewhatword?_________________9. Thehusbandspositionistobethe____________.10. Theleadershipstylethatspeaksto__________________and_______________.11. Thegoalinmindis__________________.12. Theeffectsofthemarriageshouldbe:a. thatitis_______________thatitis_____________thatthereis______________.

LXXX. DefiningCoreA. Itisasmallbutessentialingredientofeverymarriagethatmustnotbecompromised,neglectedorignoredifamarriageistosucceedoverall.

B. CoreRoles1. Amarriageisa_______________________relationship.2. Topeoplethatare______________________livinginsuchawayastothe________________benefitofbothandtodothattheybothhavetoplaytwo_____________________roles.C. CoreResponses:3. Onething____________.4. Onething______________mustdoto.D. Core Concerns5. Therearenumberof____________thatyourwifehasthatwillneverchangeandyoumustknowwhattheyare.6. Thereareanumberofthingsyouhaveinyourlifethatwill_________changethatyourwifemustmeetinyou.

LXXXI. Core RolesA. Thehusbandscoreroleishis______________________.• InamarriageleadershipisdefinedasblendedoppositesB. Thecoreroleforawomenisthe___________________.

• Paulinstructions:1. Helperheremeanstheservant______________________.C. Thiswordhelperisusedoffourpeopleinscriptures:1. God the __________________________

2. God the __________________________3. God the __________________________4. __________________________

“Husband,livewithyourwifeinanunderstandingway.”

Authentic Manhood

Session 25A Man and His Women Pt. 2

I. A brief review:A. Ourkeyverseandaverywisestatement.1Pet.3:7B. OurThreeModelsofMarriage1. TopDown_________________________2. 50-50_____________________________3. Side-by-Side__________________________II. MarriagefromaBiblicalstandpointweneedtolookathreecoreissues.• Core• Itisasmallbutessentialingredientofeverymarriagethatmustnotbecompromised,neglectorignoredifamarriageistosucceedoverall.A. CoreRoles....That_____________givesahusbandandawifeinMarriage.1. Godcallsthewifea_______________________.a) Thistitlethatstress___________,____________and_________forthemembersforonesfamily.Prov.31:10-12Prov.31:27-292. Theman/husbandiscalledtobe_____________.a) Thisisatitleofhonorthatstress_____________________,_______________________,_____________________,anddirectionforthemembersofhisfamily.B. CoreResponses...that_____________________yourmatesrole.1. Forthewife,sheneedsaresponsefromherhusbandof_________________and________________________.1Pet..3:7Prov.31:282. Forthehusbandtofulfillhisleadershiproleheneedsfromher,________________________.a) Submissiondosenotmeana______________________person.b) Submissionisnotaman’sto____________________fromhiswife.c) Submissionisnotmeanan_____________________ofwrongdoing.Col.3:18C. CoreConcerns...Thatmeetyourmatesdeepest_______________________.1. Tothewifetowardsherhusband:

a) ____________________b) ____________________c) ____________________d) ____________________

II. Meeting the deep needs of a women:a) _______________________________(1) Mustdo:(a) Regularly_______________yourwife.(2) Cando:(a) Developacommon_______________areatogether.(3) Displaysomecourage:(a) Planaspecialjustforyou________________,yearly.b) ______________________(1) Mustdo:(a) Tellheryouare____________________toforlife.(2) Cando:(a) Establish________________________disciplines.(3) Displaysomecourage:(a) Seektoprovide_____________________sothatyourwifedoesnothavetowork,ifshedoesnotwantto.c) ______________________(1) Mustdo:(a) Regularlytellhowmuchyou________________andhow__________________________sheistoyou.(2) Cando:(a) Surpriseyourwifewitha________________________ofpraise.(b) Lavishyourwifewithspecial___________________.d) _______________________________(1) Mustdo:(a) Regularly_______________________________.(2) Cando:(a) Learntosay____________________________.(3) Displaysomecourage:(a) Onspecialoccasionsletyourwife_____________________whyyouloveher.

III. Why we need to teach and proclaim the side by side biblical model of marriage:

A. It___________________amanandawomenforwhattheydobest.B. It___________________amanandawomentocomplementeachotherratherthancompetewitheachother.C. It__________________anenvironmentthatis___________forthehealthydevelopmentofchildren.D. Itbecomesthe________________wecantrainourchildrenfromanearlyagetoembrace.E. It________________God’swordandis____________________byHim.F. It_________________and_______________________societyasawhole.

Authentic Manhood

Session 2625 Ways to be a Servant Leader

I. 25 Ways to Be a Servant-Leader:1. Aservant-leaderincludeshiswifein______________________thefuture.2. Aservant-leaderaccepts________________________________forhisfamily.3. Aservant-leaderiswillingtosay______________and_______________tohisfamily.4. Aservant-leaderdiscusses_________________________responsibilitieswithhiswifeandmakessuretheyare________________________distributed.5. Aservant-leaderseekstheconsultationofhiswifeonall________________________decisions.6. Aservant-leader___________________withcommitmentshehasmadetohiswife.7. Aservant-leaderanticipatesthedifferent___________________hismarriagewillpassthrough.8. Aservant-leaderanticipatesthe____________________________hischildrenwillpassthrough.9. Aservant-leader_______________________tellshiswifewhathe_________________________.10. Aservant-leaderprovides______________________forhisfamily’sbasic________________.11. Aservant-leaderdealswith_________________sohecan__________________________withhiswifeandfamily.12. Aservant-leader___________________withhiswifeonaregularbasis.13. Aservant-leader______________________meaningfulfamily_____________.14. Aservant-leader_______________________forthefamilyonaregularbasis.15. Aservant-leadertakesthetimetogivehischildren______________________________aboutlife,whichinturngivesthemconfidencewiththeirpeers.16. Aservant-leader___________________the___________________ofthehomeandanticipatesanypressurepoints.17. Aservant-leaderkeepshisfamily________________________soundandoutofharmful_________________________.18. Aservant-leadermakessureheandhiswifehavedrawnupa_____________andarrangedawell-conceivedplanfortheir___________________incaseof___________.19. Aservant-leaderletshiswifeandchildrenintothe_____________ofhislife.20. Aservant-leader______________________hiswifeofteninpublic.21. Aservant-leaderexplains_________________toeachchildinawaythatgivesthemawholesomeperspective.22. Aservant-leaderencourageshiswifeto_______________asanindividual.23. Aservant-leadertakestheleadinestablishingwithhiswifesound,biblically-supportablefamily____________________.24. Aservant-leader____________________________asmallgroupofmenwhoarededicatedto___________________theirskillsasaman,husband,andfather.25. Aservant-leaderprovides__________________________forhiswifetopursueherownpersonal______________________.

Authentic Manhood

Session 27Fathers and Sons

LXXXII. The Power of Dad:A. ThreemodelsofParenting:1. The___________________parent.

2. The____________________parent.

3. ________________________parenting.

B. DadisDestiny1. Hispresenceorlackofithasnorivalwhenitcomestoshapingtheformativebeginningsofchildlife.

Prov.17:6

• Everysonneedstohearthreethingsfromhisdadoverthelengthofhislifetime.7. Son,I____________you.8. Son,Iam________________ofyou.9. Son,youaregoodat________________.

EvenJesusneededtohearthat.

LXXXIII. The Three Ingredients of Strategic Fatherhood:A. The___________=Thedigis______________________________.

B. The ___________ = The Set is_______________________________.

C. The___________=TheSpikeis____________________________.

LXXXIV. 5 Characteristics of A Memorable Ceremonies.A. Memorableceremoniesare____________________.

B. Memorableceremoniesascribe________________________________.

C. Memorableceremoniesalways________________________________.

D. Memorableceremoniesinvolve_______________________________. E. Memorableceremoniesalwaysempower________________________.

LXXXV. Ceremonies that Robert Lewis Used: A. The“Page”Ceremonyofpuberty• Dobsontapes“PreparingforAdolescence.”A7-tapeseries

B. The“Squire”ceremonyofleavinghome.

C. The“Knight”CeremonyofcollegeGraduation

D. The‘Oath”CeremonyofMarriage.

Authentic Manhood

Session 28A Man And His Life Journey

LXXXVI. The Life Cycle MapA. SeasonsofaMan’sLife(DanielLevinson,BallantineBooks,1978)1. Theyfoundthatmenfollowacommonlifecyclewiththesamebasicseasonalcharacteristics.B. AnOverview1. 0-22-__________________________________________stage.2. 17-45-_________________________________________stage3. 40-65-_________________________________________stage4. 60-?-_________________________________________stage

LXXXVII. You could associate them with the four seasons of a year.1. ___________________________whereamanisgrowing.2. ___________________________whereamanishot.3. ___________________________whereaman’slifeisfullofcolor.4. ___________________________whereaman’slifeisdecliningandfinishing.A. TheFourSeasonsandTransitions:1. Spring-0-22-___________________&____________________stagea) Transitiontakesplace.1. Summer-17-45-___________________________stage2. Fall-40-65-_________________________Adulthoodstage3. 60-?-____________________________stage

LXXXVIII. The Life Stages Map• TheMasculineJourney(RobertHicks,NavPress,1993)

1. Adam:The________________________-0-20stageofmasculinity.2. Zakar:The______________________-13-25-stageofmasculinity.3. Gibbor:The_____________________-20-40-stageofmasculinity.4. Enosh:The______________________-40-50-stageofmasculinity.5. Ish:The_________________________-50-60-stageofmasculinity.6. Zaken:The______________________-60+-stageofmasculinity.A. TheSixLifeStages B. Adam:TheCreational-0-20stageofmasculinity.1. Giftsandtalents.

2. Two question that must be answered in this stage to move successfully to the next stage.a) __________________________________b) __________________________________Prov.22:6

C. ThePhallicStage-Zakar-(13-25)1. Sexualenergy1Thess. 4:3

D. Gibbor:_______________________________(20-40)Prov.20:29

1. Adriveto_____________________oneself.2. Thegoalinthisstageistoestablishyourselfasa________intheworldandfightforit.3. Thegoalinthisstageoflifeisto__________________.

E. Enosh:The_______________________-40-50-stageofmasculinity.

1. Thisisthestageofpowerful_____________________.2. Thisistheseasonof___________________________.F. Ish:The_______________________-50-60-stageofmasculinity.1. Thisstagereflectsamanbecausehehasmadetheright____________________isnowtherulerofhisownsoul.G. Zaken:The____________________-60+-stageofmasculinity.1. Thismanmovesof______________________stageandbecomesastandardbarrier.Prov.20:29

LXXXIX. The Last Map Is Your Manhood Plan Map: