5 ways an introvert can build a thriving online audience

7/28/2019 5 Ways an Introvert Can Build a Thriving Online Audience

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by MELISSA NG 60

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2/61

Do you often find yourself

intensely focused on the

things that interest you? Do

you enjoy solitude and quiet?

Do you prefer deep

conversations over loud

parties? Do crowds drain you?

Does alone time energize

you?

If so, chances are youre an

introvert.

Either youre giving a knowing

nod or youre confused

because you thought

introversion meant you were

merely shy.

And maybe youve despaired

that that introversion and

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3/61

shyness have held you back

from achieving your business

goals online?

Introverts canbe shy but so

can extroverts.

Likewise, introverts can also

be confident, social, and

inspirational in their own

right. Take self-described

introverted bloggers like Brian

Clark, Chris Garrett, Chris

Guillebeau, Guy Kawasaki, and

Sonia Simone.

Or to take things to a higher

level, revolutionary thinkerslike Mahatma Gandhi, Albert

Einstein, and Rosa Parks.

Susan Cain, author ofQuiet:

The Power of Introverts in a

World That Cant Stop Talking,

clarifies that introversion is

different from shyness, which

is a fear of social judgment.

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4/61

Introversion simply means you

are more energized and at

your best in less stimulating

and quieter environments.

So, how can introversion help

you achieve world domination,

how can you the introvert

capture the hearts, minds,

and trustof an audience?

The m yth of the

unprofitable

introvert

The advice usually revolves

around you putting yourselfout there in some way. But as

an introvert, you might be a

little wary about how much

you expose yourself.

This would be considered

problematic in our extrovert-

favoring American

culture. Your cautiousness

gets criticized as being not

bold or assertive enough to

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5/61

stand out and command the

confidence of an audience.

But its not true. We often

forget that there is always

more than one way to

accomplish something. Whats

important is knowing what

works best for you.

In fact, qualities of your quieter

nature give you an advantage

in building your

trustworthiness and

credibility. Lets look at five of

them

1. Be bookish

Sometimes you find spending

a night with a good book more

exciting than a night out. And

when it comes to a topic thatinterests you, you could easily

spend hours reading more

about it.

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6/61

But you know what the critics

say: You learn by doing, not

by sticking your nose in a

book.

Yes, we do learn a lot by

doing. But it would be silly not

to take advantage of books

since one of their greatest

purposes is to educate.

The funny thing I notice is that

these critics are usually the

ones who have no patience for

reading in the first place.

Ask any popular content

publisher how to become atrusted authority in a niche and

theyll tell you this simple

reality:

You need to build expertise.

And that usually involves

reading a lot.

This means reading,

researching, and obsessing

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7/61

over everything in your niche.

It also helps to diversify your

reading to improve your

general knowledge and spark

new connections.

Trust grows when you support

your writing with

knowledge and understanding

of your audiences needs.

The more you know, the more

you can blog with authority

and credibility. So, read on.

2 . B e q u i e t (a n d

l i s t e n )We introverts prefer to listen

more than talk. But when we

do speak, its only when we

think we have something

useful to say.

And in todays noisy world of

increasingly short attention

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8/61

The problem is that most

people never truly listen

anymore. Instead, people just

wait to talk about themselves.

Same thing online. Many

writers online mistakenly focus

on themselves instead of on

their readers needs.

We cant trust a self-centered

writer.

But we can trust a writer who

listens first and offers solutions

later.

By listening, you understandthe minds and needs of your

readers. And when you know

whats on their minds, you can

craft more focused content to

solve their problems.

Listening online is just like

what youd do in reality. You

observe where the

conversations on your topic

are happening. This can be in

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9/61

your favorite social media

hangout (like Twitter or

Google+), your site comments,

forums, or (if youre starting

out) your favorite sites

comments.

Listening deeply takes

patience and understanding.

Do it well and your readers will

be sure to lend you their ears(and eyes).

But if you dont have anything

useful to say, dont say

anything at all. The Internet is

cluttered enough as it is.

3 . B e s e r i o u s

When were focused on

something we care about, we

introverts can pour some

serious time into it.

Your thrill-seeking friends

might even say youre too

serious. That you need to

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10/61

have some real fun and go

crazy.

Today, being called too

serious is like being called a

killjoy. But we dumb down the

act of being serious when we

substitute its meaning with an

inability to have fun.

By definition, to be serious

means to be earnest, sincere,

and characterized by deep

thought.

And in the case of the content

youre creating, if you want to

win the hearts and trust ofreaders, you need to be damn

serious.

Being serious means having a

sincere interest in improving

the lives of your readers, being

consistent, and getting back

up from every fall.

Being serious sometimes

means skipping fun time in




11/61

order to finish your product

and deliver on your promises.

Being serious means really

committing to your readers

and the life of your ideas.

Trust is a precious thing that

isnt given away freely. You

need to work hard to earn it.

And if you want to gain and

keep that trust, you need to be

someone they can rely on.

Theyre counting on you to be

serious.

4 . B e se n s i t i v e

Youre usually considered a

sensitive soul if you frequently

reflect on your thoughts,

feelings, and experiences.

If you get started on a topic

youre passionate about, you

may occasionally surprise

yourself and others with your




12/61

emotional firepower. Or

maybe youre easily moved by

sad movies.

Of course, the know-it-alls will

say that being emotional

makes you too delicate.

Clearly not the strong figure

readers need.

But you know what?

Readers dont trust know-it-all

towers of strength. Thats just

unrealistic and uninspiring.

Readers trust human beings

with heart and emotion.

They want someone sensitive

and empathetic.

Someone who gets them.

Someone who can feel as

vulnerable as they probably

do.

Readers want someone who

can inspire them with so much

passion that theyre brought to




13/61

tears and motivated to get off

their asses.

To share great passion, you

need to feel great

passion. And great passion

thrives on intense emotion.

Readers love an open heart,

not a hidden one. And having

strong feelings

about something is better than

not feeling enough of anything

at all.

5 . B e a l o n e

For you, solitude is a vital

source of not only energy, but

The true test of a

m ans character is

what he does when n o

one is watchin g. ~

John Wooden




14/61

also the very quality of your

work.

Its a nice break from the noisy

world when you can think

clearly, creatively, and deeply.

But solitude offers you much

more than that.

When you are alone, you are

your true self.

In solitude, you dont have to

perform for anyone. Free from

the influence and pressure of

your peers, your thoughts and

opinions are at their most

authentic.

And becoming a trustworthy

and memorable writer

depends on your ability to be

authentic to yourself and your

audience.

Yes, its important to listen to

what your readers need (refer

to #2). But when you finally sit




15/61

down to write, you must take a

position.

And that means knowing

yourself well enough to know

what you believe in, to know

what you stand for.

In the end, if you ever want to

have a trusting relationship

with your audience, you need

to first know and trust yourself.

Your solitude is key

to accessing yourself. Dont let

anybody ever take it away

from you.

T h e w o r l d n e e d s

q u i e t

In a gentle way, you

can shake the world. ~

Mahatma Gandhi




16/61

One of my favorite points on

Susan Cains Introvert

Manifesto is Quiet leadership

is not an oxymoron.

Its a useful reminder that

there is no single set of

standards on what makes a

respectable and trustworthy

figure.

Fitting in with the status quo to

fulfill someone elses ideal is

an injustice to yourself. The

world needs the quiet and

contemplative, the soft-spoken

and gentle, the thinkers and

dreamers. Because if we wereall the same, then we would

have no need for each other.

Starting out, maybe only a

handful of people will

appreciate what you have to

offer. But continue to build

your trustworthiness in the

quiet ways that suit you and

your followers will grow.




17/61

Now, go forth and gently

conquer.

About the Author:Melissa Ng

[Eng] is a doodler,

entrepreneur, and inspiration-

seeker. Download her free

Introvert 's Care Package. She

doodle-blogs aboutentrepreneurship, passion,

and self-awareness at

lumecluster.com. She is also

co-founder ofPianoVerse, a

place to play, learn, and love

piano and voice in New York.

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19/61

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Comments

ALI ZIANovember 27, 2012 at 7:53 am

Hi Mellisa,

I liked the quality number




20/61

one; be bookish (Maybe

because I am of that

nature). You said right, a

good book is better than a

night out but just readingis not enough.

I think if we change quality

number 5 in ourself and

instead of being alone,

discuss what we read with

like minded friends, we

can built more thriving

audience online.

Thanks for the great

article

Reply

MELISSA NGNovember 27, 2012 at2:03 pm

Hi Ali,

My points are

really aimed at

highlighting the

common

misunderstandings

of popularly

underappreciated




21/61

qualities. Its true

that there are

benefits to

discussing our

ideas with others.However, solitude

is equally

important as

socializing and is

just as vital to

growth,

understanding,

and the creative

process.

Thanks for your

thoughts

Reply

DARIN L.

HAMMOND

December 1,2012 at 6:35

pm

Iabsolutely

agree with

this as an

experienced

introvert




22/61

and one

who has

studied

how to

overcomethis

deficiency

in my

social self.

For so

many

years I

tried to be

social,

work

together,

feel

comfortable

in front of

people,

manage

other

people,

etc.

However,

you do

well inpointing to

the

strengths

of

introverts,




23/61

and there

is plenty

of

research

out therenow that

values the

shy and

independent.

Quiet and

solitude

are helpful

to all in

some

situations,

but for

many

people

they are

the right

environment

most of

the time. I

read an

article

recently

thatpointed to

Gandhi,

Bill Gates,

Al Gore,

Warren




24/61

Buffett,

Albert

Einstein

and many

othergeniuses

who

needed

solitude

and quiet

in order to

be most

productive

and

creative.

A great

myth of

our time is

that

everyone

must be

equally

social, or

even

worse,

that thehighest

person

within an

organization

must be




25/61

the most

outgoing,

social, and

collaborative.

We arewise to

remember

that

people

are unique

and work

optimally

in

different

environments.

Few

things are

more

painful

than a

person

who feels

comfortable

working

independently

but is

forcedinto social

environments

where she

cannot

give her




26/61

best

effort.

Feelings

of guilt

andshame

combined

with

anxiety

are the

result, and

this is a

recipe for

eliciting

the worst

performance

possible.

Skillful

managers

and

leaders

recognize

the

qualities

of each

individual

and triesto help

them do

their best.

In

blogging,




27/61

most

experience

more

freedom

which iswhy I feel

so

comfortable

with it.

Unfortunately

its not

always

profitable,

but your

tips help

point us in

the right

direction.

Thank you

for the

insightful

post. I

needed it.

Reply

MELISSA

NG




28/61

December 3,2012 at 10:04pm

It

can

bedifficult

to

resist

the

social

pressures

toconform

but

all

we

can

do

is

keep

tryin

to

understand

and

stay

true

to

ourselves.

Thanks

for

the

thoughtful




29/61

SONIA SIMONENovember 27, 2012 at 9:53 am

I really enjoyed Susan

Cains book. My favorite

from her Introvert

Manifesto is: Everyone

shines, given the right

lighting. For some, its a

Broadway spotlight, for

others, a lamplit desk.

Reply

comment.

Reply

J ACNovember 27, 2012 at11:31am

Sonia, This is SO

true. Everyone can

shine under the

right circustances.

Thanks for

bringing out this

quote from Susan

Cains book.




30/61

A great introvert

)

Reply

BRENDA GOLBUSNovember 29, 2012 at

11:03 am

I love this quote

but I have to add

that even as a

consummate

introvert I

occasionally like

the limelight. Ishine on the right

stages but then

crave the solitude

of a lamplit desk.

MELISSA

NGNovember 27,2012 at 1:25 pm

Cheers to

that

Reply




31/61

DEMIAN FARNWORTHNovember 27, 2012 at 10:11am

Heres the thing: I enjoy

people. I like talking to

them. Hanging out with

them. But on my own time.

And in a very limited

amount of time. Like 2% ofthe time. The other 98%

devoted to solitude.

We need people,

however, and they need

us. And a successful

introvert learns how to

scale that wall and get in

front of people. Build

relationships (which are

often small in number but

insanely deep). Not for

himself. But because he

cares about other people.

Invtroverts can make

some of the greatest

leaders because they do

listen, reflect and

research. They are Platos

Philosopher King.

Reply




32/61

True story: the first time

my wife met my moms

side of the family (a very

large and loud family) she

casually mentioned that Iwas shy. They absolutely

lost it. It just takes me a

while to warm up to

strangers.

Great article.

Reply

SHERICE JACOBNovember 27, 2012 at 11:10 am

I found myself nodding

and smiling throughout

this whole article. Thanks

for giving us introverts the

chance to shine (quietly

and brightly!)

Reply





33/61

MARCYNovember 27, 2012 at 12:05 pm

Wonderful and inspiring

article as usual. I really

have no idea if Im and

introvert or extrovert, but I

know the truth of this

article speaks to both.

Listening, being authentic,

and truly caring are

necessary to connect with

your audience. Thanks for

the encouragement!

Im glad it made

you smile.

Whatever we are

(introvert,

extrovert, etc.), wemust remember to

give ourselves the

chance to try (and

keep trying) and

not let our peers

define who we

are. Shine on

Reply




34/61

Reply

J OANNA PENNNovember 27, 2012 at 12:28 pm

Thanks for posting this I

loved Susan Cains book

and recommend it a lot. It

helped me recognize

aspects of myself that I

can now accept andcelebrate, rather than

chastise myself about!

Its also important to

remember that introvert

doesnt mean shy that

introverts can be social

and be international

speakers and network etc,

but we need to manage

our energy in a way that

allows us to do that. I have

now learned from

experience that to speak

for one day, I need to

schedule time either side

to store energy and then

replenish it. And I cant do

3-4 day conferences

fulltime or I die from over-

stimulation.




35/61

Energy management is

therefore the most critical

thing!

For those who might notknow what they are try

the Myers Briggs test It

helps to understand

where you are on the

spectrum.

Reply

BRIAN CLARKNovember 27, 2012 at1:07 pm

People always

wonder why after Ispeak at a

conference, I tend

to disappear in my

room. Well, now

you know.

Reply





36/61

MALINDA JOHNSON

November 27, 2012 at 12:36 pm

As a successful introvert, I

couldnt agree with you

more!

Reply

PEGGY VARNER,

BAFFINPADDLERNovember 27, 2012 at 12:45 pm

Yes, knowing you

need that time to

yourself is crucial.

Everyday, I spend

a lot of timespeaking to

teachers and

students at my

company. Every

now and then I

like to hide in the

storage room to

re-energize

Reply




37/61

The sign of an excellent

article is that you read

every word, and go back

and reread some of it, and

then take the time tothank the writer and the

publisher. Thanks for this

great article and

opportunity to find a good

book. Also, thanks for

explaining what the word

introvert might actually

mean. Most think its a

word for a bad thing. Ill

bet a lot of writers and

bloggers are introverts.

And thats certainly not a

bad thing.

Thanks and cheers from

Canada. I enjoy following

Copyblogger.

Reply


Thank you for

your warm




38/61

LINDA MURRAYNovember 27, 2012 at 1:37 pm

In the grocery store I mayhave a 10 minute chat with

someone about salad but

most often only say things

like Yes, No, or Thank

you. In a tennis match I

plot with my partner and

play to win then chat up

our opponents with a

smile afterwards. I return

home to peace and quiet

before my noisy kids are

out of school. I love the

solitude of fly fishing and

having a beer in a pub

with happy cheering about

football. Introvert or

extrovert?

After reading this post I

feel better answering

comment, Peggy.

Being an introvert

is certainly not a

bad thing at all

Reply




39/61

introvert. I guess its like

trying to divide the

population into 12

personality profiles based

on the month you wereborn in. Humans are too

diverse to categorize in a

small number of

categories. Yet there are

many truths to be found

and better understand

ourselves by

acknowledging our

commonalities.

Thank you for the great

post.

Reply

CHRISNovember 27, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Melissa,

This is an article I find very

helpful! I consider myself

an introvert and, having

just recently started my

own blog

(www.startsmallmarketing.com),




40/61

its important to follow the

5 points you discussed. In

fact, every post I sit down

to write, I try to think about

the topic, the side I am on,and how to explain it all. I

find being an introvert is

great for productivity as I

am very efficient during

my alone time!

Reply

DAVID PENNINGTONNovember 27, 2012 at 2:00 pm

I have been an introvert

forever. Introverts, while

not necessarily shy,

certainly need different

platforms to thrive. Thanks

for writing this, I know that

the internet is 100% the

reason I am where I am

today.

Reply

MELISSA NG




41/61

LI-LING


Melissa, thank you for this

very timely reminder! In

this day and age of

attention always being

given to the loudest voice,

it is so easy to forget that

it is not always necessary

to join the fray.

Although I am a social

person and enjoy

communicating with

others, I am not by nature

an extrovert and find it

hard to blow my own

trumpet, thank you forreminding me that there

are other, sometimes

better ways to make a

difference.

November 27, 2012 at4:46 pm

Glad it was

helpful. Oh, how I


42/61

Reply

ERIC GALENovember 27, 2012 at 3:20 pm

As an introvert myself, I

was very excited to read

this. Thank you for sharing

such powerful insights. I

really enjoyed Susan

Cains book as well. Istrongly agree enough

with Quiet leadership is

not an oxymoron. Thank

you again for letting the

world know that being an

introvert is not the same

as being shy and that we

have value to contribute.

Reply

DEBORAH GABRIEL


I wanted to mention the

the beautiful, fluid

doodles, the quiet motion

of the introvert. thank you




43/61

for sharing those.

dg

Reply

LINDA MOSESNovember 27, 2012 at 5:37 pm

Interesting article. There

are bloggers who do

terrific work as long as

they can blog without be

seen. So many now are

calling for transparency;and those who do not

want to be seen will have

to make sure their content

is bigger than life.

MELISSA NG


Thank you,

Deborah. Im so

happy you enjoy

them!

Reply




44/61

Reply

SALLY MAYORNovember 27, 2012 at 6:09 pm

Hi,

Thanks for an excellent

article. Forgive me for

being a pedant but

shouldnt it be online

audience rather thanaudience online?

Sally (a bookish introvert).

Reply

SONIA SIMONE


Depends on what

you see Online

as modifying. As it

is now, it modifies

build, but if it wasAudience online

it would modify

audience. Two

slightly different




45/61

ANDREW


Melissa you naile dit!

I can relate to all of thosetraits and so often feel that

Im not the type to make

significant progress bu

then still waters run

deep..

I particullary like this line

Introversion simply

means you are more

energized and at your

best in less stimulating

and quieter

environments.

Thanks for a really good

post.

Reply

meanings, either

works.

Reply




46/61

J ARED LATIGONovember 27, 2012 at 9:34 pm

Very insightful post! I

learned that Im an

introvert. Never knew that.

Never really tried to

understand the definition

of it of course, but still.

Thanks!

Reply


Were all learning

things everyday. I

highly recommend

Susan Cains book

if you want to find

out more about

introversion. Its a

great place to

start

Reply




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GABENovember 27, 2012 at 9:38 pm

Thanks for this, Melissa.

Its good for me to be

reminded of these things

regularly. A great goal in

life is to be the best me I

can be the way I was

made, not the way I think

everyone wants me to be.

I love that Im able to see

growth in confidence inwho I am over the last

several years. Working

online is a great place for

an introvert to shine!

Reply


Im so glad this

could help. The

path for selfimprovement is

tough and never

ending. At least

know that youre




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RICHARDNovember 28, 2012 at 12:19 am

I feel as if this post is

written for me only. Being

an introvert, I do agreewith most of the points.

Reply

TOM KINGNovember 28, 2012 at 12:50 am

I really liked this article as

it hit very close to home. I

know personally I can not

work well unless I am

alone!

Reply

PAWEL PIEJKONovember 28, 2012 at 3:31am

not alone on that

journey

Reply




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Well, I think writers who

dont like being alone and

quiet, dont like reading

and listeningdo not

exist. But most ofcopyblogger readers are

writers AND introverts, so

nicely done Melisa, at

least at the know-and-

satisfy-your audience part

Reply


Perhaps. But there

are some writers

who enjoy doing

work in busy

cafes. I even have

a friend who can

only write with

music or TV

running in the

background. I

personally enjoy

writing with a

single track on

repeat We




50/61

J ENNIFERNovember 28, 2012 at 6:45 am

Thank you for highlightingthe positive side of being

bookish, serious and

sensitive!

Reply

ANGIENovember 28, 2012 at 10:20 am

Thank you for lightening

my load. I oftentimes find

myself among people who

take my introvertednessfor inability, which I find

thoroughly irritating! Yes, I

am a quite leader;

bookish, serious and

passionate (especially

humans are a

diverse bunch

with diverse

needs.

Reply




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when I am absolutely

certain of my convictions.)

This article was refreshing

and encouraging!

Reply

NTATHU ALLENNovember 28, 2012 at 1:33 pm

Thanks for publishing this

blog. i am really enjoying

the views and thoughts

and comments. Mydaughetr, who has

recently started university

introduced ME to Susan

Cains work..Like most new

students, my daughter


Im so happy it

helped. Keep

doing what you

have to do

Reply




52/61

was feeling swamped and

overwhelmed by the

whole process of typical

student life so it was a

god send to her to comeacross Susans work and

regain her confidence nad

self belief that quiet and

being myself is great! and

as chance would have it,

today I read this post!

Thank you. keep

spreading the word.

Reply

MELISSA NG


Its wonderful to

know your

daughter is able to

find herself in the

midst of the

pressures of

university life.

Thank you for

sharing such a

sweet story.




53/61

HELLOPRESTONovember 28, 2012 at 2:53 pm

This is the 2nd post Ive

seen today referencing

Susan Cains Quiet. Looks

like I have more fuel for

your #1 tip.

Reply

LISA WEIKELNovember 28, 2012 at 4:28 pm

Melissa,Thanks so much for this

great post. I love solitude

and find the hours whisk

away far more quickly

than Id like when I permit

myself to dive deeply into

whatever I am reading orwriting. Youve described

me to a T and inspired

me to purchase Susan

Cains book. Id heard it

mentioned on NPR, I

Reply




54/61

believe, and only heard

the last bits. Im thinking,

now, that I should follow

up on it.

Reply

TINANovember 29, 2012 at 12:46 am

Wonderful post Melissa.

An as introvert myself, Iveoften wondered about

how being an extrovert or

an introvert impacts on

building a successful


Would love to

hear your

thoughts on the

book. I know I

thoroughly

enjoyed it

Reply




55/61

business. Very insightful

post. Thanks!

Reply

ANNNovember 29, 2012 at 11:03 am

Wonderful article! As an

introvert, I found myself

agreeing with all of it, aswell as everyones

comments. Thanks for all

the great insights. Always

be true to who you are.

Reply

BRIGITTE VAN TUIJ LNovember 30, 2012 at 11:18 am

Hi Melissa,

Great post, thanks forsharing! I am an extreme

introvert myself, and it has

taken me quite a while to

totally accept and

embrace it, and see it as a




56/61

quality and a gift instead

of a burden I had to learn

to live with.

And finding a way tosuccessfully build my

business and fulfilling my

mission while being a

hermit has presented me

with an interesting

challenge over the past

couple of years (to put it

mildly

Your post shows that, yes,

all of us CAN thrive in our

own unique way, whether

were introverts or not.

Everyone has unique

qualities and gifts to

share.

Thanks Melissa!

(P.S.: I recently wrote an

article about my own

journey and challenge;you can read it here if

youre interested:

http://www.brigittevantuijl.com/breakt

from-the-cave/)




57/61

Reply

PHYLLIS EDSONNovember 30, 2012 at 12:10 pm

Thanks you so much for

writing this article. Its

taken me years to realize

Im an introvert and what

that means. I cant wait to

look up some of the books

you mentioned. Thanks,

again.

Reply

ARI HERZOGDecember 1, 2012 at 10:47 pm

MELISSA NGDecember 3, 2012 at 9:54pm

Im so happy for

you. Lets keep up

the good fight!

Reply




58/61

I find most successful

bloggers (who have

community, not

necessarily money from it)

are introverts. Enablesthem to say what they

want.

Reply

ROSHINIJanuary 25, 2013 at 8:46 pm

Beautiful post. Felt as if

you are talking directly to

me and about me. Thanks

for sharing

Reply

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